#pran apologist

[thegayneurodivergentagenda]

I haven't read the in depth analysis by people yet but I would like to just say that

Pran made Pat talk about needing him first the same way he made Pat admit to the entire Architechure faculty that Pran is Taken. It was for Pat and not because Pran doesn't show growth.

He realized that since Pat needed to be needed just as much as Pran didn't want to need him, and he sacrificed his want over Pat's need. He gave in. He always gives in.

#pran apologist #please hes just a baby #i will not take ANY slander on how the conflict was not addressed completely #because it wasnt and thats FINE #its okay !!! #bad buddy #our skyy 2 #patpran #bad buddy brain rot #bad buddy our skyy 2 #pran parakul

[wen-kexing-apologist]

Bad Buddy x ATOTS aka Damn You WMT

Dear @waitmyturtles, fuck you, respectfully wen-kexing-apologist. Turts, I have shit to do, I do not have time for this. But once again I CANNOT STOP THINKING ABOUT IT SO, FUCK ME I GUESS WE’RE DOING A FOREST EPISODE. 

More specifically, we are doing an Our Skyy 2, Episode 15 Part 1/4 post, probably far earlier than I should be, and definitely instead of doing work I absolutely need to be doing. But Pat and Phupa’s interactions in this part of the episode have me thinking about Phupa and his relationship to queerness. 

I don’t know about anyone else, but I had a marvelous time watching Part 1 of our latest Bad Buddy x ATOTS crossover episode. Why? Because it is absolutely incredibly fun to watch Pat personally terrorize the local gay elder. 

What I have really been enjoying in these crossover episodes is watching the ways the similarities and differences in Phupa, Pat, Pran, and Tian play out. Each person spends most of the time paired with the character who play the same role in the relationship but whose personalities and approaches to their relationships are very different. Phupa is the support in his relationship with Tian, Pat is the support in his relationship with Pran, but Phupa never bends and Pat always gives in. 

The thing I love about Pat is that he is unabashed in his queerness, he rolls up on to the scene and starts flirting the second he opens his mouth, and then he 

Literally

Never

Stops

He annoys Pran, he tests the structural integrity of the house with Pran, sure, but he also wakes up next to Phupa and then proceeds to never let Phupa forget that a) he would and b) that they thought they might have. 

He rolls up on the scene as Phupa and his coworker are getting ready to head into the forest, and he starts talking openly and loudly about Phupa’s boyfriend, and the relationship problems they are having. 

Phupa is less than amused.

Phupa does not want Pat coming with him, Pat sneaks into the back of the truck, Phupa begrudgingly allows Pat to come with him and Pat says “you’re the cutest”

Phupa is less than amused. 

I’m gonna skip ahead a little bit and then regress if that is okay with everyone, after Phupa puts bandaid’s on Pat says yet again “what a cute print, Chief”, “you have a cute side, Chief” 

“No wonder teacher is head over heels for you,” 

Here Pat is, one half of the first queer couple to interact with Phupa and Tian in god knows how long or possibly ever, talking casually, happily, loudly, and openly about Phupa’s relationship with Tian and Tian’s feelings for Phupa. Reaffirming to Phupa in a way that it is obvious that Tian is in love with him.  

And still Phupa is not having it. 

As they continue their walk, Pat starts smelling the trees and Phupa is like oh jesus fucking christ what the hell are you doing you are making my life a living hell- “What are you doing?” 

And in response, Pat is very open and sappy about Pran. 

gif from @liyazaki

“Pran smells so good, if he is nearby, I can find him,” and Phupa is flabbergasted. He just stands there for a second, looking Pat up and down like “okay, seriously…what the fuck?” and he is so obvious about it in the way he looks at Pat and in the way he walks away, that Pat is able to tell immediately that Phupa is, once again, not vibing with Pat’s casual references to his queerness, or overt and honest love and admission of intimacy with his partner. Pat knows Pran’s scent so well that he is confident he could pick it up in the middle of the forest. That suggests a level of familiarity with a body that would traditionally be considered uncouth, if you were polite, and doubly so if you are queer. 

gif from @liyazaki

When Phupa starts walking like he’s over the conversation, Pat’s easy smile shifts to confusion “What? Haven’t you smelled Teacher’s body before?” 

(Translation: Aren’t you also so in love with your partner, and aren’t you so intimate with your partner that you could recognize his scent anywhere you went? Looking at you watermelon soap sponsorship…looking at you tea bag smell pouch…)

And it’s the inclusion of the word body that really strikes me here, because to say “what? Haven’t you smelled Teacher before?” evokes a different relationship than “What? Haven’t you smelled Teacher’s body?” does. 

“That’s too bad” Pat says, and leans suggestively close to Phupa. Like a cat toying with a mouse. Pat likes needling at Phupa’s discomfort around explicit references to Pat and Pran’s sex life. And while we know Phupa has most certainly smelled Tian’s body before, Phupa SPINS around, has this brief moment of absolute wide eye about being so blatantly asked a question that alludes to his physical relationship to and with Tian, looks Pat dead in the eye and says “I’m not a pervert like you,”

gif from @liyazaki

Harsh words. Incredibly harsh words, especially because of the connotations of queerness with perversion, especially because iirc from the KinnPorsche LGBTQ+ Facts special on IQIYI, pervert is often an insult used in Thailand for queer people. Phupa is uncomfortable with Pat’s open conversation about his queer relationship, about his queer intimacy and he chooses to meet Pat with homophobia in the way of a slur. 

But Pat is having fun, and I honestly believe he expects that kind of reaction. Pat and Pran were awkward witnesses to Tian and Phupa’s little domestic about watching him shower and looking lovingly into their eyes, but Phupa is stiff the whole time, he is aware that he is engaging in that conversation while other people are present, and he can’t take it and he literally flees. And some of that is because he is getting riled up about their fight, but we see in part 2 of this episode that when Phupa is actually angry with Tian about something, he has no problem standing up and planting his feet to confront Tian about it. 

Anyway, Pat is having fun, and Pat wants to test Phupa and so, completely unphased he starts talking about how Tian smells, as if he is familiar. He is like "my boyfriend smells soooo good, do you smell your boyfriend's body? Your boyfriend smells good" and it’s a direct display of Pat's comfortability with his partner, their closeness, and their level of intimacy. 

“Teacher Tian smells so good” Pat says with the world’s widest grin 

“How do you know that?” Phupa asks almost challenging

“I thought you said you’d never smelled him” 

gif from @liyazaki

Caught ya. Phupa has indirectly admitted to intimacy. Pat has successfully engaged Phupa in a conversation that is completely about Phupa’s queerness. 

And as Part 2 goes on, we are made more and more aware of how little outward public affection Phupa and Tian engage in. If Phupa and Tian touch around other people, there has to be a legitimate reason to do so (Tian fainted, Tian fainted again, Tian fainted a third time, Tian is drunk, Phupa is drunk, etc.). In this episode, Tian is weak and almost collapses in to Phupa’s arms because he exerted himself too much with his heart. Phupa’s hand is on Tian’s back and then Tian is away from him and standing upright, and when Phupa, Tian, Pat, and Pran exit the forest and enter the clearing of the safe house. 

Pat is using Pran as a crutch, and Phupa and Tian have placed a child in between them. They are not touching, they aren’t even standing all that close to each other. Phupa is in ranger mode, sure, but he’s not really in front of people he has to impress, he doesn’t have to be completely professional and on guard when they are in the shack together. Especially when his partner with a body that is currently trying to reject his heart, is sitting there looking on the verge of a heart attack. 

Phupa is making direct eye contact with Tian here, he is worried about Tian here, his focus is on Tian here, and yet he does not offer any physical comfort. No reassuring touch, no forehead kiss, hell, not even a hand on the back of his head to check for fever. He’s focused on getting the radio working, which is incredibly important in case there is a medical emergency, but he does not spare a second to physically ground him and Tian. He can only look from a distance. Because there are other people around, there is a child around. Phupa can’t be seen engaging in homosexual softness, Phupa has to be seen as a forest ranger, doing his job, his actual job that involves rescuing his stubborn dumbass boyfriend from yet again getting lost in the forest, but does not involve him being in love. 

Again, Phupa truly has no one here he needs to impress, he’s in a room with a child, his boyfriend, and a couple of nuisances that have shown him absolutely zero respect since the moment they waltzed in to his neck of the woods. 

At dinner even, after things have settled down, Phupa still cannot bring himself close to Tian in front of prying eyes. 

Pat and Pran? Literally sitting side by side, knees touching. They are as close to each other as they possibly can be without literally sitting in each other’s laps. 

Here is a close up of Pat and Pran literally making physical contact with each other at the knee and at the elbow. 

And what Phupa and Tian do not know, is that Pat and Pran can't be outwardly and openly affectionate to one another in public when they are at school and so they make up for it by being disgusting when they aren't in school. Pat and Pran have to keep up a pretense, and its a tragic undertone to their ability to diffuse the brewing Tian and Phupa fight by looking at each other, nodding, and then improvising a fight realistic enough to get Phupa and Tian to pull them apart. 

Because Pat and Pran’s relationship at home is a metaphor for external homophobia, because they are so used to it by now, the having to hide, to pretend they don’t like each other, to pretend they are mad, to pretend they aren’t in love, that they can just ease right in to staged fights at the drop of a fucking hat. But even in their fake fight they wind up pressed up against each other. 

(hehe, screen shot funny, look at Phupa, he zoomin’)

Because for so long the only way they could have physical contact in public was by fighting, was by beating each other up, was by pushing or pulling each other away from a fight. Pat and Pran understand that Tian and Phupa are having a fight that they also once had, but they can also see the parts underneath it, the parts that make Phupa ask why the emphasis on him in Tian’s story is about Phupa being in love with Tian rather than his work. 

Pat is simultaneously taking the opportunity of being hours and hours away from home, from where he has to hide his relationship, to be as openly and obviously in love with Pran as he has always been and is telling Phupa he is safe to be gay around. That he and Pran are safe people to be gay around, are safe people for him to be openly affectionate with his boyfriend around. 

And that stems from the parts of Pat and Phupa that are wildly different. 

Like, it is very very notable that Pat confesses his feelings for Pran practically as soon as he realizes that he has feelings for him and initiates the rooftop kiss which they share before they are even together, and then they have a bunch of little kisses, and they sneak as many touches as they can, and they make out multiple times in the show 

And Phupa and Tian have…a single forehead kiss and then one kiss, at the top of a mountain, where no one would ever be able to see them after their story is complete. 

In last week’s crossover episode, the level of intimacy that Phupa engages in with Tian is called out, even by Aof himself with the roleplaying scene between Pat and Pran where they pretend to be Phupa and Tian putting up a mosquito net and conclude that they absolutely must have kissed then. 

But we know they didn’t. We know how painstakingly long it takes for Phupa and Tian to reach that level of intimacy with one another. 

I'm even thinking backstory-wise, what is forest ranger training like? Is it part of the military? Did Phupa's gay ass have to enlist in a presumably male dominated field and like, go to training, and be around a bunch of guys, and make sure they didn't suspect he was gay?

I’m thinking about the moments in last week’s episode where it seemed like things were going better between Phupa and Tian, and it was always when Phupa was physically affectionate with Tian, putting his arm around him and not letting him go, when they were at karaoke, and when they were drunkenly stumbling home together, again locked in eachother’s embrace, where anyone could see them. 

To regress as I promised back to the leech scene I am struck by what the approach to removing the leeches says about Pat and Phupa respectively. 

Pat rips the leech off of him and Phupa takes time to put a lighter to them and pluck them off in a way that does not hurt Pat

Pat rips the leech off and bleeding for it, hurting himself in the process, because he is impulsive and impatient, Pat bleeds emotion, he's practically incapable of hiding what he's feeling, and he must obey his emotions before all else. Therefore, in Bad Buddy Episode 5, when he realizes he has feelings for Pran, Pat immediately has to talk to Pran about his feelings, immediately leans in to the emotion he is feeling in the present moment, and initiates a kiss. A kiss that leaves him feeling blissful, and that leaves him hurt because Pran walks away, because Pran has known forever how much he likes Pat, because Pat has only just figured out his feelings, he hasn’t had to sit with them for long, and yet that kiss is an equally strong release for both of them. When Phupa removes the leech from Pat’s leg he is methodical and patient, he tries to minimize the wound, it takes longer but it has the same result which is why it takes so damn long for him and Tian to get together. When I watches ATOTS and they touched pinkies under that blanket and I went "ah yes! This is the part where you start making out and fucking cause they are adults who have maybe been in a relationship before and who have both been obviously painfully aware of their feelings for eachother since the moment they laid eye on each other"...and then they don’t. Phupa waits, and waits, and waits. 

I think the fundamental thing that I see replaying in this episode especially, and with Pat and Phupa’s interactions especially is the elder versus younger queer mentality we got in Moonlight Chicken, with very different characters from Jim and Li Ming, but following a similar pattern of restraint and time versus just jumping right in. 

And it’s also why I think the conversation between Pran and Phupa is so important:

gifs by @nanons

Pat and Pran’s need to keep their relationship secret because of their family’s, and because of Pran’s mom specifically is a metaphor for external homophobia. Pat and Pran are extremely comfortable in their sexuality, very open in their love for one another when they are amongst other queer people, or amongst allies, when they are away from their hometown or when they are in the privacy of their homes. 

There are a lot of different pieces in play around Phupa and Tian’s relationship, but there is ultimately a metaphor at the most or a blatant sense at the least of internal homophobia on the part of Phupa. 

Pat has chosen to stay “in the closet” in order to be with Pran. In a convo with @shortpplfedup about this, Nini said it the most accurate and heart wrenching line: “It's honestly that Pran can't really ever compare to Pat's sacrifice here, and he KNOWS it,” 

Similarly, Phupa believes that Tian has made a sacrifice to be with him, and he knows it. Which is why he can’t bring himself to go to Tian’s birthday, because Tian has left before, because he is scared every time Tian goes that he will realize that Phupa isn’t enough. Because Phupa is afraid of being seen as Tian’s partner. Because Phupa is really only capable of being physically affectionate behind closed doors. When they are completely alone.  Cause even in the camp, when the child is sleeping and Pat and Pran are off literally fucking in the tent minding their own goddamn business, Phupa cannot bring himself to touch Tian.

They’re sharing place but not space, or whatever it was that Ayan said to Akk in their Our Skyy 2 episodes. When Phupa gives Tian his medicine, at most their fingers brush, they don’t sit down together, they don’t ground themselves with touch. They share this place, but they do not encroach on each other’s personal space…

…until Phupa falls asleep

gif by @earthpirapat

At which point Tian gets up, and places his blanket on him, and physical touches his arm, his shoulder, etc. as he is adjusting the blanket for him. 

Tian initiates the touch, Tian stayed in the village with him, Tian is sacrificing his health to be here with Phupa. Phupa has spent 90% of his time alone with the bouncing ball of sunshine that is Pat, and 5% of his time with the chaotic homosexual energy of Pat and Pran together, and to be real, as much as we know about Pat and Pran’s relationship, and as much depth as we are able to pull from these specific characters interacting in the way they do, Phupa has no idea what Pat and Pran have been through to be where they are. 

To anyone who does not know Pat and Pran’s story, they seem like nothing more than two horny young adults in love, who feel no need to hide themselves and their queerness away, that have never had a struggle in their life, and do not understand the trials and tribulations of navigating an older queer relationship, who will last the length of a honeymoon period and then disappear at the first sign of real conflict. Thus, I think Phupa grossly underestimates the company he is currently keeping.

So I think, personally, Phupa is kinda of struck by the sudden and unexpected depth that comes from Pran. That Pran is able to identify and then absolutely hone in and strike at the exact things that Phupa is struggling with. As much as Pat has both relished in the freedom he has to be disgustingly in love with his boyfriend in the woods, and as much as Pat has tried to make himself an obviously safe person to be openly gay around, Phupa is incapable of understanding what he can learn from Pat and Pran’s relationship until he realizes these boys have a lot more in common with him than he thought, and that their relationship and their relationship to one another is more complex and therefore more similar to him and Tian’s situation than he would like. 

Pran and Phupa carry the weight of feeling like nothing they do will ever compare to the sacrifices their partner has made to be with them. I didn’t get much in to Pat and Tian here, but their interaction makes it clear that they both carry the weight of feeling like their partner does not need them. 

Phupa has literally saved Tian’s life on numerous occasions, Tian is chronically ill, Tian has limitations. Phupa is a forest ranger, who is a foundation in his community, who is skilled and competent, and fiercely independent. Pat is disorganized, and impulsive, his father is the reason he and Pran can’t be open about their relationship, he is the reason Pran got sent away. 

We get a fun reversal with dynamics in these Bad Buddy x ATOTS episodes because Tian and Phupa are older, but Pat and Pran have an entire lifetime of navigating and overcoming conflict under their belt. Pat and Pran have already weathered the storm of the fight that Tian and Phupa are having. They have already settled in to who they are, but Pat and Pran (Pran especially) are able to see the ways that always giving in and never backing down wears on a person. Pran learns from seeing the pain that Tian is in that being uncompromising might cause fractures in their relationship in the future. 

Tian and Phupa (Phupa especially) are learning how to resolve their conflicts. Pran, who is holding on to Tian and Phupa’s story so tightly because it is shared, because it is open, because anyone who wants to can know about it, pushes Phupa, who cannot cope with being portrayed as being in love with Tian, to read all of the diary Tian published online. Pran pushes Phupa to push through the emotional blocks, to push past his initial concerns, and to assume Tian wrote and published this story with both an understanding of who is partner is and what Phupa is comfortable with, and with no intention of hurting anybody. 

Anyway, all of this to say, that this episode has really made me analyze Phupa with an internalized homophobia lens, and though one can never trust a P’Aof trailer, it has left me with two impressions. 

On the subject of Phupa and internalized homophobia, and needing to move past that (and more) in order for his relationship with Tian to survive this fight, @shortpplfedup said it best: 

“Now I'm thinking about one moment from the preview (but just a moment!) where Phupha tells Tian he's not gonna sneak to look at him, he's gonna OPENLY look at him”

And cause it seems like Phupa learned some things from the Bothersome Boys:

--

Case in point:

Here's multiple hours of my life I will never get back, at least I had fun! Time to go do the work I was supposed to be doing tonight :p

That's all folks!

#our skyy 2 x bad buddy #our skyy 2 x a tale of thousand stars #our skyy 2 #our skyy 2 x bad buddy x a tale of a thousand stars #bad buddy #a tale of a thousand stars #atots #patpran #pranpat #nanon korapat #ohm pawat #ohmnanon #earthmix #earth pirapat #mix sahaphap #gmmtv #aof noppharnach #our skyy 2 x bbs x atots #phupha x tian #tian x phupha #pat x pran #pran x pat #thai bl #thai series #bad buddy analysis #atots analysis #bad buddy meta #atots meta #bbs analysis

[lurkingshan]

I’m thinking a lot about the scene between Pran and Tian where they discuss the fight Tian and Phupha are having. Not the fake one about who liked who first, but the real one about Phupha refusing to travel home with Tian or change anything about his life to meet Tian’s needs. It’s a funhouse mirror image of the conflict Pat and Pran are having about how much Pran should let Pat help him, and their long-term dynamic of Pat letting Pran win every disagreement and always being the one to compromise or give in when their needs are in tension.

What I love about it is that Tian doesn’t know anything about their relationship, he’s just (drunkenly) talking about his own experience, and how frustrating and exhausting it is to be with someone like Phupha who never meets him halfway. And Pran is sitting across from this guy who looks like his twin, whose story he has already memorized and connected to, who he now thinks of as a sort-of friend, and he is self-aware enough to see the parallels instantly, and to feel a little embarrassed and ashamed that he is essentially the Phupha in his relationship. And you see him react, just a little, and maybe start to think for the first time about what it must feel like for Pat to yield to him on everything, and never have that reciprocated by Pran.

Reading this wonderful post from @waitmyturtles earlier where she mentioned how she empathizes with Pran, I was also reflecting a bit about where I see myself in this story, and let me tell you, I am such a Phupha. When it comes to how I want to live my life, where I want to be, and how I want to spend my time and with whom, I am uncompromising to a fault. I completely get where Phupha is coming from - I told you who I am, and now you’re telling me it’s not enough. He is frustrated by the idea that he has to change himself for Tian, and I get that, I really do. It’s something I am personally not willing to do. The key difference between me and Phupha, however, is that I am not in love and I do not desire to be in a romantic partnership. He very much is, and very much does.

So what might a guy like Phupha think, as he is struggling so much with the idea of yielding to Tian, when he is met with someone like Pat? Someone who is so like him in some ways - in his strength, his masculinity, his physicality, his confidence, his loyalty, his desire to help others - and yet so unlike him in other ways - his emotional openness, his vulnerability, his comfort with compromise, his absolute willingness to put his pride aside for his lover. Where Phupha is rigid, Pat is versatile, in every sense of the word. There is a lot Phupha might learn from talking to someone like Pat about how he sees his relationship, why he is always willing to bend to Pran’s needs, and why he ultimately feels it’s worth it, even if he sometimes feels some of the frustration that Tian does. Might Phupha have his own epiphany next week, opening up a path for him to finally compromise on something important to Tian?  

@dribs-and-drabbles, I’m not sure how this might fit into your theory about the patterns playing out in these episodes, but I really hope we get to see this happen next week, and watch both of these couples learn from each other’s experiences and find a way to meet their partners in the middle. Because as @waitmyturtles said, this is the work of being in a long term relationship.

In the server with @bengiyo @shortpplfedup @kyr-kun-chan @wen-kexing-apologist we talk often about how amazing it is when romances address what happens to couples after they get together, and how exciting it is that we are starting to see more bl shows about the work of staying together, and I’m so glad that the genius minds behind Bad Buddy and A Tale of Thousand Stars took the opportunity of this special to dig into that so authentically. And to have done it in such a brilliant way, by mixing and matching these characters from beloved shows, putting them side by side and demonstrating how they are similar and also how they can learn from each other, creating a sense of community in this shared universe, and making it all so damn fun along the way, is just an unbelievable treat for us as an audience. Can't wait to see how it all comes together next week.

#bad buddy #a tale of thousand stars #our skyy 2 #thai bl #shan shouts into the void

[ranchthoughts]

✨2023: A Summary✨

Post your most popular and/or favourite edit/gifset/analysis for each month (it’s okay to skip months!)

Tagged by @lurkingshan (here) and @wen-kexing-apologist (here). Thanks for the tags!

In 2023, I made 175 original posts, including 45 metas about 12 different shows and two large scale projects (the GMMTV Multiverse and the GMMTV Kissing charts). It was interesting to see what meta (and how much) I had written in which months. It's also fun looking back as I approach my one year anniversary of watching and writing about BL - I'm so grateful for all the wonderful people I've met and gotten to chat with over these past months!

January and February [0 metas]

I wasn’t on BL Tumblr yet! Any and all meta came in the form of thoughts, texts, and powerpoint presentations.

March [6 metas]

My BL Tumblr debut! I started this blog with the intention of 1) more easily gathering and archiving posts for future reference, and 2) collecting my thoughts somewhere other than text threads and my notes app, so I began posting meta the day I got here.

Most popular: what started as me thinking about Win’s rock t-shirt from ep 11 and then grew from there… - reading a lot into a random Thai ql shirt choice? Me?

Favourite(s): Thoughts on Tinn, his mother, and coming out (part 1, part 2); Thoughts on Tinn, his mother, and music - My first meta ever posted! I keep returning to Tinn and his mother's relationship in My School President...

April [1 meta]

By default, the most popular (and favourite): Gun's feelings are realistic - I love when MSP subverts our expectations

May [13 metas]

Oh damn! This was a big meta month for me. Some of my favourite metas I've ever written were posted this month.

Most popular: The Eighth Sense and Missing Pieces - I am really proud of this one. It also made me laugh that I apologized for the length at the beginning when I would go on to post much, MUCH longer metas.

Favourite(s): Thoughts on genre, tropes, Bad Buddy, and My School President (aka my Bad Buddy and MSP thesis, which began life as a powerpoint presentation... now here's one of those much, MUCH longer metas in question); Wai as a faen fatale (which also began life as part of that same powerpoint presentation and I think perfectly encapsulates my analytical style); Conversations in ITSAY that are about more than they seem (I am really proud of the analysis I did here and the writing style I used to present it). This was also the month in which I started my deeply self-indulgent GMMTV Multiverse project, which later inspired my mission to record all GMMTV kisses.

June [11 metas]

Oh nooo another bunch of my favourites. This is cruel to make me choose.

Most popular: Thinking about Pran's "Pat, you've got to stop doing this to me" (I love this one! and this was the first of several times I've gotten to collaborate with the wonderful @dudeyuri)

Favourite(s): An analysis of the baseball mom shirt, Bad Buddy ep. 5 (my entry into the venerable field of Bad Buddy/ql shirt analysis and also encapsulates pretty much everything I try to do in my metas); An impassioned defense of the Bad Buddy ep. 5 rooftop kiss (combines many of my favourite things: reading deeply into the minute details of Bad Buddy, an analytical framework that just clicks itself together as I write, and literature reviews); and Thinking about Snow White as the engineering play, part 1 (shout out to the two other people going ham on Snow White as an allegory during the Our Skyy 2 madness - @chickenstrangers (here) and @letgomaggie (here))

July [3 metas]

Most popular (and favourite): Thinking about Pat, Pran, and pursuit (I think this was my first time articulating the idea of Pat and Pran's commitment to the bit, a concept which continues to circle in my head. This was also another collaboration with the wonderful @dudeyuri!)

August [7 metas]

Here comes Only Friends... and the GMMTV Kissing Multiverse project.

Most popular: GMMTV Kissing Multiverse updates 1, 2 and 3 (this is so much fun to track and analyze, and I've been really touched by everyone else's excitement for the project too); Various thoughts and musings on Only Friends and ephemerality (the Ephemerality Squad assembles!)

Favourite: Thinking about Boston: a study of episode 3 - I find Boston's mind a fascinating place to explore

September [8 metas]

Oh look! It's more Only Friends!

Most popular: Mansplain, Manipulate, Manwhore: Ray confronting Boston - once again, I love getting into Boston's head. This post was inspired by @wen-kexing-apologist's scene breakdowns, especially their Fight Night one

Favourite(s): The above, and also The Mundanity of Meanness

October [5 metas]

Most popular (and favourite): The first fist bump in Bad Buddy - oof. I've gotta come back to this idea sometime.

November [3 metas]

Most popular: The Latest Update to the Kissing Multiverse - the hotly anticipated post-Only Friends update to the kissing charts

Favourite: the kissing charts, and Thinking about Pat, Pran, and competition - again, I love to think about Pat and Pran. I consider this one to be part of an ongoing series, along with my earlier metas on pursuit and the rooftop.

December [1 meta]

Most popular (and favourite): Not Me and earrings - technically an addition on @chickenstrangers' post, but was a relief to get my months old "Not Me is about ears and earrings!" thoughts out.

some no pressure tags: @chickenstrangers, @distant-screaming, @dudeyuri, @neuroticbookworm, @slayerkitty, @telomeke, @twig-tea, @waitmyturtles

#bl wrapped #ranch thoughts #honestly all laid out this doesn't seem like a lot. I'm surprised by how much more I wrote in May and June! #fascinating how you - Shan and WKA - also didn't start your meta journeys until a couple of months into 2023

[waitmyturtles]

@manogirl and @telomeke both tagged me in tag games recently, and I apologize to @manogirl, because I'm about to play one that you did NOT tag me in, but hopefully this covers my responsiveness to you -- thank you both!

9 People You'd Like To Get To Know Better

3 ships (make it 4)

Let's see, these guys (Shiro x Kenji),

and these guys (Togawa x Nozue),

and these guys (Kurodachi),

are my absolute OGs, but these guys (Pat x Pran)

now live equitably in my brain(rot).

First ship

The old guards:

If you don't know already, these two (Nishijima Hidetoshi and Uchino Seiyo) exhibited THE BEST ACTING in any BL ever, and fight me about it! <3 <3

Last song

Oh shit! Speaking of old guards:

The motherfucking LEGENDS! I guess Thaitanium might be the first Thai media I ever consumed; I was listening to these guys in my 20s before I ever knew that Thailand produced amazing dramas.

Currently reading

Dr. Thomas Baudinette's Boys Love Media in Thailand.

Last movie

Aam Anusorn's BL: Broken Fantasy. (Not really a movie, more of a mini-documentary)

Currently craving

Lunch, some kind of lunch

TAGS! @isaksbestpillow @shortpplfedup @bengiyo @thegalwhorants @whatisgodtoanonbeliever @blmpff @neuroticbookworm @wen-kexing-apologist I dunno who else but consider yourself tagged!

#thanks for the tag! #9 people you want to know better #9 people tag #Youtube

[ginnymoonbeam]

11, and please feel free to list more than one :)))))))

SO. All but one of the asks I've gotten so far include 11, which is very funny. I suspect this has something to do with my loud and proud enjoyment of several taboo setups, such as stepsiblings/pseudoincest. And I wanted to take this opportunity to write about some of those, I really did. I thought I was finally going to write about my treasured mess, Ye Xingsi and Fu Yongjie. But here's the thing: taboo is different from forbidden, and the more I thought about it the less it fit. The forbiddenness in that relationship isn't the primary or even the secondary issue. And instead of writing a whole essay on why they and most other pseudoincest pairs aren't doing "forbidden love" as a primary trope, I sigh and turn my gaze to other pairs.

Forbidden Love, to me, has to involve at least one of two things as a primary obstacle: unyielding social/familial barriers, or deep internal guilt. It's one of several tropes on the list that plays a little different for gay ships, because in so many contexts just the fact of being a same-sex couple makes it a forbidden love. Most BLs let the social barriers soften pretty quickly, if they're present at all, and very few have the characters really wrangling with guilt (shame is slightly more common, but that's another essay I'm not going to write right now.) However, we do have a few stellar examples.

Pat and Pran, Bad Buddy

Obvious when you think about it. Pran's mother explicitly says that she'd accept Pran being with anyone except Pat (or Pat's sister.) From Pran's secret, agonized pining to them sneaking into each other's rooms years later, their whole relationship is conducted under the understanding that their parents cannot and will not accept it. A lot of Bad Buddy's power comes from the way it transmutes familial homophobia, letting queer viewers who live under that same degree of forbiddenness and secrecy see their experiences reflected without having to sit through on-screen homophobia.

In and Wang, 180 Degree Longitude Passes Through Us

Here's the other side of forbidden love, one that's primarily about internal guilt. The attraction between In and Wang is deeply triangulated on the ghost of Wang's father, but that doesn't mean it isn't genuine. Here's a love that In understands to be forbidden in every aspect: by age, by prior bonds, by his own enduring reluctance to accept his desire for men. Inthawut's guilt is a millstone in every moment between them, and in the end it sinks any possibility of a longer relationship. Now, is it better for both of them that it went that way? Almost certainly. But it's still a relationship saturated with guilt and the consciousness on In's side that this is and must be forbidden. And it constantly calls up the echo of In's past relationship to Siam which, without the same weight of guilt, might have taken beautiful flight.

And I don't want to end without a nod to a few historical ships, where the characters really are restrained by the simple fact of being gay in a hostile society:

Tian and Jiu, Khun Chai

Eeang Peung and Maey, I Feel You Linger in the Air

Jom and Yai, I Feel You Linger in the Air

(also tagging EVERYONE ELSE who asked me this one: @twig-tea @shortpplfedup @wen-kexing-apologist)

Ask me!

#ask game #bad buddy #180 degree longitude passes through us #khun chai #i feel you linger in the air

[dudeyuri]

That was perfect for me. Genuinely have no notes. That brand of Bad Buddy humor was on point—the rivalry between Architecture and Engineering, the accidental porn mishap, Pat and Pran competing with each other while still being so lovey dovey. And that huge apartment they have together??? Domestic bliss??? In their fake hating era!! As a shenanigans apologist, I’m also totally sold on the crossover for now. We’ll see what tomorrow brings

Finally some good fucking Our Skyy 2 food. Knowing it’s going to last two weeks is giving me heartburn but I’m also grateful (I’m excited to watch a show I love, etc)

#bad buddy #our skyy 2 #I was cheesin the full hour like THEYRE BACK #I might even rewatch like right now

[telomeke]

Thai QL Favorites Tag Game

Tagged by my Internet buddy and fellow QL fan @pandasmagorica! Thanks 🥰

Credit also: this game was created by @thatgirl4815 as Thai BL Favorites Tag Game.

So let's get into it:

Favorite Thai QL: Bad Buddy, still. After all this time it continues to hold up, I think because it packed so much intelligence into its short run of 12 episodes. I also have a soft spot for Moonlight Chicken, although it is arguably more queer cinema in episodic form and not classically a QL/BL.

Favorite Pairing: Umm, gonna leave aside the ships and talk about professional pairings for QL series. Ohm and Nanon as PatPran still top my list; they tore my heart to shreds in Bad Buddy and healed it too. But I don't need to see them as any other pair in another series also for that reason. MaxTul seem to bring it in any series they're in, so they get a mention too.

Most underrated actor: Have to agree with @pandasmagorica about Fluke Gawin Caskey. They need to use him more – he's doing a truly credible job in Be My Favorite plus wow he can sing really well. And I think Krist Perawat in the same series is also surprising all of us; he's certainly matured since his stumbly, mumbly turn in SOTUS.

Favorite Character: Eep. This is like trying to choose among your children. I love so many! Pat and Pran for different reasons (I'm very much like one, more than the other, but I love them both). But I also like Li Ming in Moonlight Chicken, maybe because of his confident self-knowledge, and all the hope he represents for the next generation.

Favorite Side Character: Arm from KinnPorsche for the wrong reasons; devastating combination of nerdy and also hot when shirtless. Also maybe Daddy Chan from the same show. And (odd/unpopular choice) maybe Dissaya from Bad Buddy; I'm just fascinated by her character and backstory, and wish we got told more of it. Also Manaow from Until We Meet Again and Yihwa in Together With Me for being the effervescent supportive besties I wish I had growing up.

Favorite scene in a QL: The opening scene in Ep.5 of Bad Buddy because it tells us so much, in so many layers, and upon the re-watch you can sense that something's starting to turn (though the closing scene on the rooftop is a very close second, for obvious reasons).

Favorite line in a QL: Pat and Pran at the end of BBS Ep.5 going "Do you want us to be friends?" followed by the softest, most gut-wrenching "No..."

Most Anticipated QL (& why): Only Friends – looking forward to something steamy for a change. Been too long since KinnPorsche.

Healthiest relationship in a QL: HeartLiMing in Moonlight Chicken. And PatPran in BBS, but only post-Ep.12 timeskip. They're so respectful to each other – but also a bit boring, so I'm not sure I'd want to watch them in another show because a drama with no drama wouldn't be a drama, now then would it?

Most toxic relationship in a QL: VegasPete in KinnPorsche? I'm still divided about their dynamic. Or TharnType in TharnType perhaps. That was just badly written.

Guilty pleasure series: KinnPorsche. Nuff said.

Most underrated series: He's Coming to Me really needs more love. Production values not the strongest but themes, acting, storyline are all top-notch (with some minor points only that I might want to quibble about). One of the earliest to deal with cultural themes in Thai QL and it was fascinating.

Tagging @airenyah, @dribs-and-drabbles, @waitmyturtles, @bengiyo, @twig-tea, @colourme-feral, @miscellar, @ranchthoughts, @chickenstrangers, @dudeyuri, @inventedfangirling, @dimplesandfierceeyes, @wen-kexing-apologist, @starryalpacasstuff, @kattahj, @lurkingshan, @neuroticbookworm...

...@theheightofdishonor, @dimpledpran, @silvercrystal1, @mineonmain, @sharingfandoms and anybody else I might have missed, feel free to play (or not!).

#thai ql tag game #apologies if any of you have blacklisted anything that's on here #i guess i'd better tag the number one offender: #kinnporsche #also #bad buddy #patpran #moonlight chicken #tharntype #until we meet again #together with me #heartliming #maxtul #bad buddy dissaya #until we meet again manaow #together with me yihwa #vegaspete #fluke gawin #krist perawat

[gennianydots]

OS2 Favorite Moments with Genni: Ep 16 A Tale of Thousand Stars (Part 1)

ALL! (AHHHHH!) PARTS! (HOLY SHIT!) WERE! (NO REALLY HOLY FUCKING GOD DAMN SHIT THIS WAS AMAZING) MY FAVORITE!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHH

❤️❤️❤️) : ) PAT AND PRAN’S ( : (❤️❤️❤️

🌱🌱🌱) : ) LOVE SPROUT ( : ( 🌱🌱🌱

🌾🌾🌾🌾) : ) MY BELOVED ( : (🌾🌾🌾🌾

I knew we would see THE SLUTS™️ again

Read a post @wen-kexing-apologist about the internalized homophobia Phupha holds inside over these four episodes and how he is careful in his outward love of Tian in public and it - ughh makes so much sense - and I noticed Phupha’s love (/Earths acting) was a lot louder when they were alone (representing the queer journey for MANY people) and i just — WOW

Also tentative small touches, hands, feet, closeness as the queer experience; P’aof is saying so much with so little

This kiss was 💜BEAUTIFUL💜 also this counts as A MAKE OUT IN THE WOODS

gay cuddles are so precious to me ahhhh

Phupha you can’t just say “on a scale of 1-10 how would you rate me” and not credit Pat, but also they are NOT patpran because tian gives his man an 11/10, also the nong nao sleep mask is in the shot showing us just how much patpran influenced phuphatian…something something older gays vs younger gays

mix’s look of love™️ gave me such a dopamine rush

hot damn earth is hot 🥵

THE PLAY! MY SLUTS! AHH I FUCKING LOVE YOU PATPRAN

Good job babies 🙌🏼👏🏼💐

Continues in Part 2

#OS2 Favorite Moments with Genni #our skyy 2 x a tale of thousand stars #our skyy 2 #a tale of thousand stars #phupatian #earthmix #1k* #patpran #our skyy 2 x bad buddy x a tale of thousand stars #p’aof my beloved #bad buddy #the queer experience

[movementsofmylife]

bad buddy ep 8 (rewatch)

how many times does pran pull out his entire (extremely intense) set of markers and not use them:

total so far: //// /

this is the episode of call backs, and references, and improved scenes. also one of the episodes which fully destroyed me with the ending on first watch.

starting with improv scene one, i love that this was nanon's idea. it's so cute and the fact that ohm clearly hated it in real life, as well as in character, perfect.

this ep is also the saga of orange. it's all neutrals, orange, and green, unless they're in private or, in one case w pat and rugby.

the entire episode has them in colors that aren't their own, but put blue/red/yellow in the background, or as accents.

i really like that they've done this because it shows them trying to acclimate to this change in their relationship. and also the fact that they have to hide everything even more intensely now. it can only exist in the background.

reference no. 2 to the outside world, the happy birthday song that ohm plays on the xylophone for nanon (iirc it's for him, but might be for someone else on set). this whole scene was cute af.

the giiirls, in their green and yellow. honestly i am so so grateful we got them.

and got to see ink shut wai the fuck down.

reference no. 3, the nanon and sizzy song, which ngl not even this scene could get me to actually like.

also! this is when wai sees them. this is so early. which makes his outing them soooo much worse, because the entire bar convo happens after this, ://

once more iirc i think part of the clumsiness was just love. which is again, perfect casting, extremely cute.

also omg i love this scene.

and now that i've seen that mastermind edit of ink, i am wondering if she had the whole "call to cancel on us" thing planned with the other club member lol

i just, i mean, look at how cute. also the call back to the call backs. this pat just makes me,,,,, ,, ,

so the exception to the exceptionally orange ep. which is intriguing, because this is what he's wearing when pat thinks he might have been found out by his friends. and also as he's feeling sad over the rooftop phone incident. and it shows like a commitment to this relationship and his desires for it to be more out and loud which he tries to keep hidden from pran because he knows that pran's not ready for that yet. it's such a bold choice and so good at conveying pat's feelings. once more, this fucking show.

this head pat is truly one of my faves. also just the blue/red more peripheral with the orange in the center, with yellow inside of that, and also doom green. it's saying so much!!!

ok so the fact that wai heard this, and knew or suspected something with pat and didn't bring it up and instead outed them. just, i'm not like a wai hater (and also not an apologist lol, just a find wai amusing in his terribleness), but someone said he had main character syndrome and truly. (also just finished ep 9 and that episode makes wai so goddamn annoying).

also, i know the 'when did i teach you to lie' or w.e line is deeply terrible, considering everything. but truly this line was the worst for me. because it's also a blatant lie. but one that i don't even think ming realized he's lying about.

like he has intervened in pat's life so much. pat wouldn't even be playing rugby if he hadn't been all, rugby best, be mvp. and it is implied it's like that for a bunch of other stuff, likely with his major too. and then he has the audacity to say this. fuck this man.

look this incredible well done diegetic music plus flashback ugh. i don't even like flashbacks, but this ep used them so effectively.

the flashbacks during this xylophone scene, with again, diegetic music. this show! the call back to the same technique from the previous scene but now sad af. it's simply so good at destroying me.

and finally to my favorite theme of this whole episode. it's patpran learning about each other's boundaries and learning to respect them. and looking at the difference between love as a feeling and love as an action.

i love that this show doesn't have them magically be perfect together because they've had feelings since high school. instead it shows that having feelings is different to embodying, enacting, being a person in a relationship.

i fucking love this episode. it's so good. i say that about every ep though.

#bad buddy #bad buddy ep 8 #it's been a week #but i finally got back to it #badbuddyrewatch #also if you could not tell #the ming line was basically lifted verbatim from my parent's lips #and it's one of those things that make me so mad

[jin-can-eat-me-like-biryani]

I got my cousin to watch bad buddy. She was kicking her feet the whole time. She lost it now. She is worse than me. She is kissing the laptop screen and pinching the screen trying to pinch pat and prans cheeks. She is a Wai apologist. And she was shipping wai with pa more than inkpa (let's not judge her choice tho🤦😂). She caught the cushion on the sofa so hard wahike watching the ep4 ending that it gor scratches and we got scolded the next day for it🥲. She can't get over their cuteness and is following ohmananon on insta . All this happened in span of 3 days.

Anyway...the biggest thing was- today we went for a wedding. Being from India weddings are extravaganza and fully ritualistic. She was looking that the wedding rituals and just blurted out-

"I WANNA WATCH PAT AND ORAN HAVE AN INDIAN WEDDING"

I LOST MY SHIT!! SHE OUT DID ME IN THIS SHIT! I AM IN THIS BAD BUDDY AHIT FROM THE DAY THE MOCK TRAILER RELEASED AND NEVER HAVE i ever thought about PatPran Indian wedding. And my cousin just blurted out CUZ SHE IS NOW EQUALLY OBSESSED AND CANT GET THEN OUR OF THEIR HEAD!!

DID I DO A BAD THING SHOWING HER CIZ SHE GOT ADDICTED NEXT LEVEL. IS IT MT FAULT? OR is it what it is and I should leave it up to fate????

#bad buddy #patpran #bad buddy series #ohmnanon #PatPran in Indian wedding!

[snickerdoodlles]

Wai’s still the same

So something that I haven’t seen mentioned yet is how a lot of Wai’s actions in ep7 directly parallel his actions in ep1. And I want to turn a quick light on that because I’m personally really invested in how Wai’s actions have turned from a positive push in Pran’s life to a negative one due to different contexts, and how I think they will still change again as the story goes on and all these characters grow together

Put this under a readmore since it got long, but here’s some rambles about how Wai’s trying to be a good friend and why it’s not working, plus some Pat rambles as an end treat because I love that boy:

So, the first thing to talk about is Wai’s still trying to help Pran reconnect to music. Consider one of the first interactions we saw between Wai and Pran:

Music is very important to Pran and integral to himself. He’s always listening to music in everything he does and he even puts a lot of consideration in how the music integrates with his activities. It’s also a way he connects with his family and his friends, and also a very important way he expresses himself:

Yet in the audience’s introduction to the Freshy Day Music Competition, Pran insists he’s given up the guitar and he has no interest in going back to it. This is very obviously a lie, just look at the way the kid lights up any time he looks at the guitars in the music shop, but it’s a lie Pran’s clinging to. And one of the main reasons why Pran picks up the guitar again is Wai.

In fact, for most of ep1-4, we as the audience see Wai being a really good friend and a huge positive push Pran needs. Pran's main conflict in all of Bad Buddy can really be summed up here:

We know how it’s going to end, isn’t it better not to start at all? (x)

And Pran’s slowly learning that the answer is no, it’s always worth pursuing what makes you happy. You can’t know how something will turn out, but letting opportunities pass you by means you will never achieve what you want. You can’t and won’t out plan every risk, and that’s okay.

Of course, Pran’s biggest influence to overcoming this fear will be Pat. And I’ll circle back to that in a minute, but before Pat, the person pushing him and encouraging him was Wai. It’s Wai who encourages Pran to join the Freshy Day Competition and encourages Pran to confront the floor guy hitting on him via dumplings. And these pushes are a good thing. Pran is very insular and at the beginning of the show, he needs this outside push to help him confront his fears of risk. Wai’s earlier actions helped give Pran the excuse and encouragement he needed to reach for something he wanted (or, at least, something he’s scared to face).

The problem with Wai now is that he’s hasn’t realized Pran’s grown.

Pran is not the same person he was in ep1. In ep1&6, he wasn’t running away from only the guitar. He was running away from the very old and still weeping sore of his family’s drama he doesn’t want to be a part of and his long time crush on Pat. He’s wrapped up so much of this pain in his guitar that he wants to get rid of this physical reminder and presence.

Wai doesn’t know this.

Pran doesn’t open up to Wai about this very complex and messy situation. Which, fair tbh, but it means that all Wai knows is that his friend is running away again from something that he loves, something Wai had just seen Pran reconnect to:

Now, this push to help Pran come out of one of his shells in regards to music was only successful because Pran chose to make this leap--Wai may have encouraged him, but Pran was the one that ultimately chose it. The sequence where Pran is delayed getting the competition form wasn’t just a narrative tool to keep Pran away from Wai and the other engineers--it’s Pran choosing, repeatedly, to join the music competition. He could’ve let Wai distract himself getting the form, he could’ve left as soon as he saw the empty music room, he could’ve left when there were no more forms. But he doesn’t. Pran chooses, over and over, to join the competition, even if he won’t say it in words.

And that’s where Wai’s actions start to fall apart in ep7.

He assumes that Pran’s still running away from music and tries to help push Pran back to it. Just look at the progression of Wai trying to reconnect Pran to music in ep7: he starts with asking Pran to join him on sound for the play. When Pran rejects him, he still tries to get Pran to help out (and, from his perspective, Pran does seem to be pretty into it). And then, finally, he begs Pran to take over his duties as the sound person for the play and drops off Pran’s guitar that he’s been caring for.

And it’s wrong.

Wai is not listening to Pran. Even if giving Pran a push would be a good thing, it is not Wai’s place to decide this. He needs to respect Pran’s boundaries, both spoken and unspoken, and remember that it’s ultimately up to Pran to choose what he wants to do. Right now, he’s taking advantage of Pran’s nature to accept responsibilities to try to push Pran into a place that he thinks will be good for him.

Now, all of this does not make Wai a bad person. It just makes him a person.

But there are two reasons why Wai’s coming off as especially bad in this episode: Pat, and perspective bias.

Pat is just plain amazing. He’s very good at offering his help and encouragement to others in ways that don’t come off as overbearing or intrusive, and the way he acts around Pran especially highlights this aspect of his caring nature. Every time he pushes Pran to confront something he might be uncomfortable facing, he still does it in a way that still gives Pran control over the situation--he’ll ask Pran questions but let Pran set the boundaries (”do you think we could be friends?” / “do you?”), he’ll fold the newspaper but let Pran decide how much space to give him, he won’t let Pran run away but he’ll make up a bet to help Pran feel more comfortable. Pran can open up to Pat because Pat’s really the only one so far that doesn’t impose on Pran--he lets him come to him and he’s always there when Pran looks for help, and that’s why we see Pran’s first awkward and clumsy (and defensive) attempt to reach out for help in ep7

(Also, the way Pat rejects Pran hiding behind the wall of their bet but later still showing Pran that he’ll be there for him is AMAZING and we will be talking about that in a different post because I’m still half-feral over Pat being the best boy I love him so much.)

And the thing is, when we have this amazing foil and positive influence in Pat, the other characters trying to help/push Pran fall leagues short. They were good for Pran at one point and they're still actions of care, but Pran’s grown beyond it and his friends haven’t (yet).

That said, Wai’s actions are still particularly grating in ep5-7 in a way that they aren’t in 1-4, and that tone shift is also due to the change in narrative perspective.

Pran is a lot more forgiving of his friends than Pat. We see it in how the fights are framed and how Pran defends his friends in the first 4 episodes, and then we see that bias flip on the two friend groups for ep5-7 (and probably ep8 as well). But that doesn’t mean that the perspective won’t shift again.

We’ve already seen a huge narrative shift in character perspective on one character: Pat. Even just comparing how he’s introduced in the first half of ep1 to the second half. We got a speedrun on the narrative shift because of PatPran’s history, but Pat is introduced as a thug that’s uninhibited and out of control, plus a selfish jackass that won’t even do his own laundry and thinks the world revolves around him (”why did you follow me to university?”). But as soon as he starts to reconnect with Pran, his caring and nurturing personality is revealed. We even see how his confidence is mistaken for arrogance, how he gets pulled into drama he doesn’t want to be a part of, and how careful he is of other people’s boundaries even when he’s pushing someone out of their comfort zone.

the tl;dr of this is Wai’s acting the same as he always has been. He’s still the sweetheart we met in ep1-4, but he’s currently a static character in a developing narrative and we’re getting a much less forgiving narrative perspective on his flaws right now. And that’s okay! All of these characters still have a lot more room to grow, but they care about each other. It’s going to be really interesting to see how the narrative’s perspective on all of them change as we not only shift to a more balanced narrative POV in ep9-12, but also as these characters grow to be better people as well.

#bad buddy #bad buddy ep7 #long post #people can hurt each other out of love but they can also grow to be better for that love as well #all i want is for the friends to find out about patpran and decide on their own in secret to stop fighting and stop being dicks #like i just want them to go thru their character growth on their own time with many shenanigans so patpran can flirt in peace #ANYWAYS tl;dr i get being annoyed at wai these latest episodes but hes still the sweetheart from ep1-4 #i think i saw smth about a tweet about how hes not ''nice'' and tbh i???? dont get why ppl are worried about it??????????? #wai's literally never been ''nice'' have u watched ep1 #he cares and he tries but he has a mountain of an ego he needs to get over he always has #pran's just more sympathetic to him and we feel bad for him when hes bullied at work #i just dont think a b&w read on. well. any of the characters tbh but esp a b&w read on the friends is accurate #that does not fit bad buddy's overarching narrative #and if u dont care about the friends growth or reasonings thats cool but then this post isnt for u so 😂😂 nbd #i dont intend to be a shameless friends apologist but im vvvvvvvvv invested in that group squad pic at the end of the op sequence #and im v excited to see how we're going to get from the friends-as-of-now to that #the friends just havent rly changed since ep1. the audience still has to do a lot of legwork to extrapolate their characters atm #so it makes sense that they first want to show those sides and flaws of the characters first before they go onto the character growth stage #ANYWAYS SHUTTING UP NOW #this is so rambly hfjhfhjf i just have a lot of feelings about foils pat and wai ahhhhh

[luxwillbefree]

pran trying so hard to appear nonchalant as he asks "oh how do you like her then" and failing miserably

#pat: i dont like her like that #pran: 👀🤔😳.....😒😐 #i'm a pran apologist but he deserved the answer he got from pat tbh #bad buddy #bad buddy: ep 6 #lux watches bad buddy

[lurkingshan]

I am thinking a lot about Pat and Phupha today. After last week, I shared that I was excited to see how spending time with someone like Pat might open up Phupha’s perspective on his relationship and how he’s been showing up for his partner. @wen-kexing-apologist wrote this fabulous post about Phupha’s internalized homophobia and how it drives so much of his behavior, and why Pat, who is so open and unashamed of his queerness, was so successful in getting under his skin. And today, we saw all of that pay off in spades.

There was a lot to love in this final episode, but my absolute favorite thing was how we saw Phupha transform himself into the kind of partner Tian has always wanted him to be, and we saw him draw the inspiration for that directly from Pat. As soon as Pat and Pran left town, Phupha went into action.

We saw him openly share his desire with Tian.

We saw him pull Tian closer and invite intimacy.

We saw him literally steal Pat’s morning after pillow talk routine!

It was a total vibe shift! Phupha was a newly emboldened man, and why? Because he spent a few days with Pat and got to experience what a different version of himself could be like. What if he didn’t have to be so afraid all the time? What if he was more free with his affection? What if his love and care for Tian didn’t have to be something he was ashamed of, but instead something he could be proud for others to see? Pat was in Phupha’s hometown, with his community, wearing his love for Pran and his whole heart on his sleeve and everything was fine. Pat and Pran were happy and no one was uncomfortable. So couldn’t it also be that way for him?

I love that we saw him test that out immediately. And importantly, back it up by compromising and doing something meaningful for Tian by traveling to Bangkok. He finally found the confidence he needed to stand by Tian’s side in front of others and be a couple out of the safety of PPD. He gave his permission and went to see their love story performed on stage by two people he trusts to do it justice. He stood confidently in front of Tian’s family and assured them that he is devoted to caring for Tian. And he gave Tian his absolute commitment to moved forward into their future together.

That, my friends, is what we call growth! And he has one absolutely shameless hyperactive pansexual puppy to thank for it.

#a tale of thousand stars #bad buddy #our skyy 2 #shan shouts into the void

[ranchthoughts]

Inspired by a few people who have done this hi @wen-kexing-apologist and @justafriend-ql (and because I love organization):

Ranch's Thoughts

(aka, a meta roundup)

Meta 2023 Wrapped

GMMTV Multiverse

In which I attempt to untangle all the various universes in which GMMTV shows are set. An ongoing battle, so stay tuned for updates. My GMMTV multiverse posts can be found here, and my kissing chart posts can be found here.

Old Masterpost

Latest: The Multiverse so far, reorganized

Original GMMTV Multiverse Map post

Latest GMMTV Multiverse map

Kissing Multiverse: version 1, version 2, version 3

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ATOTS X Bad Buddy Our Skyy 2

Thinking about Snow White being the engineering play: parts 1, 2, and 3

Bad Buddy

Thinking about Bad Buddy and the (un)intentionality of seme/uke dynamics

Thoughts on genre, tropes, Bad Buddy, and My School President (aka, my Bad Buddy and MSP trope subversion thesis)

Wai as a faen fatale: a defense (in conversation with @chickenstrangers)

An analysis of the Baseball Mom shirt, Bad Buddy episode 5

Thinking of Pat and Pran, and genre awareness

Thinking about Bad Buddy, and prequels, and tragedies

An impassioned defense of the episode 5 rooftop kiss, aka the Rooftop Kiss and Dichotomies

Thinking about Pran's "Pat, you've got to stop doing this to me" (in conversation with @dudeyuri)

Pat, Pran, and pursuit (in conversation with @dudeyuri)

Thinking about Pat, Pran, and competition (in conversation with @dimplesandfierceeyes)

My School President

Thoughts on Tinn, his mother, and coming out

More thoughts on Tinn, his mother, and coming out

Thoughts on Tinn, music, Gun, and his mother

The Good Place and MSP: Pacing and Narrative Structure

Thinking about MSP and how it shows us that imagination and theory are not the same as real life

MSP and the relief of a sweet show

Thoughts on genre, tropes, Bad Buddy, and My School President (aka, my Bad Buddy and MSP trope subversion thesis)

Thoughts on the MSP ep.11 Chinzhilla fight scene

The Eighth Sense

The Eighth Sense and hazy cinematography

The Eighth Sense and missing pieces

The Eclipse

The Eclipse, repression, and self-knowledge

He's Coming to Me

"If you know how it's going to end, why start anything" as explored in HCTM and Bad Buddy (in conversation with @waitmyturtles)

Kieta Hatsukoi

Thinking about Aoki and Ida and how differently they think (in conversation with @chickenstrangers)

I Told Sunset About You

Conversations in ITSAY that are about more than they seem: Teh and Oh-aew floating

ITSAY is about: noses, backs, knees, and chests

Only Friends

Going to collect some of the OF ephemerality/voyeurism/control/trust, etc. posts I have written here for my own easier reference

Thoughts on ephemerality, permanence, YOLO, and photography post Ep. 2 (additions on photography by @chickenstrangers and @lurkingshan)

Where we are headed post Ep. 3 (with surveillance and voyeurism additions by @lurkingshan, @waitmyturtles and @slayerkitty)

Photography and audio/video in the series, as of Ep. 3

Boston's Manipulations - a study of two scenes in Ep. 3

Manipulate, Mansplain, Manwhore, Manslaughter: Ray confronting Boston, ep. 6

The Mundanity of Meanness

My series cataloguing moments of ephemerality/permanence/YOLO/photography/voyeurism/control/hypocrisy/accountability etc. in Only Friends: ep. 3, ep. 4, ep. 5, ep. 6, ep. 7, ep. 8, ep. 9, ep. 10, ep. 11, ep. 12

and then of course the collection of everyone's thoughts, which got updated weekly.

3 Will Be Free

Opposing Triads

Between Us

Thoughts on Win's rock shirt

Miscellaneous

Signs, symbols, icons, indexes, genre, and BL

#ranch thoughts #my meta! collected! organized! #meta masterpost

[waitmyturtles]

THAT WAS PERFECT. SPOILERS FOR EP. 4 OF OUR SKYY 2 x BBS X ATOTS.

What can I say. I don't really know what to say. I'm going to blather because otherwise I'm gonna start really crying in this Starbucks.

I have so much Aof on my mind right now, especially with wrapping up not just this Our Skyy 2 series, but Bad Buddy, ATOTS, and finishing off He's Coming To Me last night (which I haven't intentionally processed yet, because I want to do a little rewatching before I get any passing words down).

Another thing I wanted to consider before starting on the episode is that while I've been so hugely focused on Pat and Pran, that I was also saying goodbye to my very first Aof couple in Phupha and Tian. I watched ATOTS WELL before even ever thinking about doing a Thai BL watchlist. I literally only watched ATOTS to get to know Earth and Mix before the premiere of Moonlight Chicken, close to the time that I joined Tumblr last summer. And I was fucking HOOKED after that.

I mean, before I get into my thoughts on this episode, I think what I'm feeling is similar to how I felt when I finished Bad Buddy. I just feel really fulfilled as an Asian that an Asian director is exploring all of these monumental themes in such an in-depth, loving, empathic, and creative way, vis à vis the lens of queer Asian characters in Asia dealing with issues very familiar to my own culture, and my watching how these characters, vis à vis the writing and direction of Aof himself, navigate those worlds.

What I'm realizing about this episode are a number of themes -- again, themes, as I wrote this morning to dear @wen-kexing-apologist, that I see Aof returning to time and time again. (I'm feeling really surprisingly emotional still, so this post is going to ramble a bit, the writing is not calming things down as it usually does.)

I think what's getting me really emotional here is that this episode was about transcendence -- HUGE transcendence on the part of Phupha, but on all the other guys, too. But in regards to how the transcendence STARTED, and from whom and to whom it started: it all happened when Pat and Pran arrived in Pha Pun Dao, and experienced Tian and Phupha, and vice versa. All of them experienced each other, and all of them changed because of it. Because they had found queer community amongst each other, they were able to share their experiences with new people, compare stories and emotions, and grow the better because of it.

Something I didn't realize last week was (or maybe I did, and I can't remember writing about it, because I'm a jumble): Pat and Pran moved again, Hegel-ian style, as I wrote in my massive BBS thesis. They went from Bangkok to Pha Pun Dao, a nicely big trip. Pat and Pran move, independently and together, always searching for their synthesis, which they can't QUITE find, because their families are in the way.

But they came REAL close to a public synthesis in this episode, and we know that they were essentially on another out honeymoon in Pha Pun Dao last week and this week, knowing that they were in the company of another queer couple, as @wen-kexing-apologist so sharply noted last night.

And then -- vis à vis Phupha's permission, a new modality of finding openness and honesty -- they came as close to a public synthesis, together, in the play as they could possibly find. While still closeted to almost everyone around them. They were still able to provide cover for fucking Dissaya. But they were as out as they could be between BBS episodes 11 and 12.

And that's just Pat and Pran's transcendence journey. With each Pat and Pran having separate conversations with Tian and Phupha in Pha Pun Dao, they could TRANSCEND THEMSELVES, their biases about their relationship with each other, and reflect on what holds people back in their own relationship. Indirectly, Pat and Pran were learning about what was holding Phupha back in being open and honest with Tian, and reflecting back to Chief on how THEY related to that (as communicative and reflecting youngsters), and Phupha could see THEIR processing, and learn from that. Pat and Pran could process because THEY found queer community, as much as Phupha and Tian did.

So: back to Aof and his themes. The theme of community building. How building a community and strength in numbers can help you grow.

It was so meaningful to hear Phupha comment that no one understood Phupha and Tian better than Pat and Pran. BECAUSE YOU NEED COMMUNITY TO GROW TOGETHER, AND THAT IS WHAT AOF IS SAYING FOR EQUITY FOR THE ASIAN QUEER COMMUNITY: FIND EACH OTHER AND BE TOGETHER, STRONGER. There are so many forces working against that community in each country of the continent, in their own ways.

And what happens when that happens, when people find community? You get strength and growth. You get a story like Phupha, who UTTERLY TRANSCENDED HIMSELF IN THIS EPISODE, MY GAWD. And Phupha did a Bad Buddy, he did a Hegelian thesis transition. HE MOVED. HE CROSSED HIS BORDERS and WENT TO THE CITY. As Pat and Pran, in episode 11, had to go to the eco-village -- Phupha needed to go to the city to close this newly awakened circle in him to confirm his relationship with Tian, and to find his sturdiness and commitment in living his life to take care of his partner.

Phupha found his courage through Pat, seeing how utterly OPEN and sappy Pat was to Pran. Phupha found that HE COULD STILL BE HIMSELF through Pran, hearing and seeing Pran's own reticence, Pran's own inclination to hold himself back. Phupha saw himself and Tian in Pat and Pran, and saw how a different paradigm could play out, simply with different mindsets.

I'm feeling really, just.... I am feeling really deeply grateful that we got to close out all of this on Phupha's story. Especially discussed among the friends (@lurkingshan, @shortpplfedup, @bengiyo, @wen-kexing-apologist, @ginnymoonbeam, and @kyr-kun-chan) -- could the ATOTS story have held up WITHOUT Pat and Pran?

Maybe? But, but, but. That wasn't Aof's point -- AT ALL.

Aof's point was to hammer home the equity of community. How you can be a BETTER PERSON when OTHER PEOPLE are helping you reflect, with THEIR PERSPECTIVES, on your life and your struggles.

There's a part of me that thinks here that there's a parable regarding the importance of having the freedom TO BE OUT. Each of the four guys -- Tian, Phupha, Pat, and Pran -- have their own ways of dealing with outness, and what it means to them. Each of them has their own group of people that would be affected by their outness.

And, fucking Christ, how beautiful. What we got to see in this episode is the internal reckoning of each character -- BUT ESPECIALLY PHUPHA, BECAUSE HE'S THE ELDEST AND WAS LIKELY EXPERIENCING THE MOST DIFFICULTY IN ADAPTING BECAUSE OF HIS PAST EXPERIENCES that we know nothing about (Uncle Jim, Uncle Jim).

We see Pran's reckoning at the moment of the play -- that he's gonna fool Dissaya. We see Pat not giving a toss for Ming. We see Tian WANTING Phupha in with his parents.

Each of the guys are in a different place and a different moment with their micro-circles. They needed to talk about their own stories with each other, and to hear each other tell their own stories, to build this story together of community.

They needed to each, vis à vis all of each other, that each one of them, individually, do need to compromise -- but not to GIVE UP THEIR LIVES for each other, or for anyone else in their lives.

None of these guys needed to give up their lives to compromise to each other's demands or characteristics. Pat and Pran do not need to use their lives to repay the fucking foibles of their parents. They're gonna play their parents until their parents are ready, which I love and think that that's very realistic and empathic from the lens of Asian filial piety. (I LOVE @grapejuicegay's analysis -- and I like it, and am going with, the read that Pran needs to get separation from Dissaya through Singapore. Boy, do I ever fucking relate to that.)

Phupha doesn't need to use his life of reticence and secrecy to repay... what -- the world's bias against the queer community? Thailand's bias against public servants being out and open?

And Tian's is helping him through that. But Phupha couldn't have done this ONLY with Tian, because Tian has his own needs and his own issues, his own stubbornness, that Phupha and Tian need to contend with as a couple.

Phupha needed the big push, he needed the push of the community that Pat and Pran provided, and the objective REFLECTION that Pat and Pran provided vis à vis the play, to TRANSCEND himself and get to a place of openness and comfort.

And he found that, in the arms of Tian, but also in the acceptance of Tian's parents and Tian's community in Tul.

I think it is really ripping my heart apart that the close of ATOTS was told with the story of Bad Buddy. I actually don't see it ending any other way. And we didn't get a close of Bad Buddy, per se. We're getting the close of Pat and Pran and OhmNanon, for sure, but we know the boys will find ways to move forward in our beloved world of fiction, wherever they go.

We do know that Phupha has committed, openly, in family and community, to love and care for Tian, Tian with the borrowed heart and the thousandth star on his finger -- and that's exactly an ending for ATOTS that I could have asked for.

I have more to process... but mom needs a break and a cocktail tonight. I could not have asked for anything more than this -- I am so fulfilled.

#our skyy 2 x bad buddy #our skyy 2 x a tale of thousand stars #our skyy 2 x bad buddy x a tale of a thousand stars #our skyy 2 x bbs x atots #bad buddy #bad buddy the series #a tale of thousand stars #atots #pat x pran #pran x pat #patpran #pranpat #tian x phupha #phupha x tian #mix sahaphap #earth pirapat #nanon korapat #ohm pawat #ohmearth #OHMEARTH 2024 #asian queer community #asian queer themes