#rosuuuu writes

[rosuuu]

For the Sin of Swallowing the Sun

Ensemble Stars x Fem Reader

In which Yumenosaki’s first producer is forced to say goodbye

CW/TW: Blood, Animal Cruelty, Bullying, harassment, mentions of cyber bullying, alcohol, implied minors using alcohol, intoxicated intimacy, photography w/o consent, anxiety paranoia, love confession (but like not really)

Not proofreaded (I need proofreaders)

If I regret one thing about yumenosaki, it would be that night, that night and him

It was a party held to commemorate the idols for a semester well done a party that should’ve been completely innocent.

I’m not exactly sure who to blame, Maybe the Staff who had left a group of (mostly) minors to their own devices, Maybe Rinne Amagi for bringing alcohol to a school centered function

Point is someone has to take the blame and who better than Yumenosaki’s sweet producer. My thoughts run rapid and I remember that night, the music blaring through the speakers imparting my senses, my eyes flashing between the dozens of intoxicated idols stumbling across the halls

I just wanted a to get a breath of fresh air, just to take a deep breath without my lungs being filled with the acidic scent of cheap liquor and soda it only felt like a minute but I knew that it was much longer when he came to look at me.

His cheeks, slightly flushed and his breathing a bit laboured he leans his upper body against the rails, folding his arms to rest his head as he stares up at me.

It’s a blur from the lighthearted conversations we engaged in to the quiet laughs as the wind caressed our hair it was all a blur until it wasn’t and before I knew it, lips, his lips, Eichi Tenshouins lips were on mine. The kiss was soft and loving because drunken actions sober thoughts, right?

The kiss expressed so much passion so much love and I don’t know, I couldn’t bring myself to pull away maybe if I wasn’t so focused on his lips I would of noticed it, the soft shutter of a camera that was gone just as quick as it appeared

As he parts from me were out of breath, his cheeks are flushed and for a moment it’s unclear if it’s from his current state of intoxication or from the intimacy just displayed

He wraps his hands around my waist and rest his head on my shoulders and then he’s asleep, I must’ve brought him back to the party but I feel like I was on autopilot up until I wake back up in my tiny apartment from my alarm blaring.

Maybe if I was a little more put together I would of thought to check the thousands of messages, notifications and tags I had but I didn’t, maybe if I did I wouldn’t of been caught of guard by the stares directed to me during my bus trip and short walk to the school I had become so used too

The atmosphere was thick at Yumenosaki and it seemed like everyone but me knew why it seemed like I was invisible but there at the same time. The stares that would disappear the moment I turned my back wasnt helping the anxiety that grew as I approached my locker

My breathing resonated through my very bones the subtle pain in my stomach steadily making feel the urge to through up, my legs quaking and I shakily reach for my locker door resting my hand on the handle I grip it hard, my knuckles scrunching up and I desperately try to calm my rampant thoughts and ignore the eyes digging into my skin like millions of needles stabbing me simultaneously

‘Why am I like this? It’s just another day at school just open the locker what are you doing?’

I cut the thought off swiftly opening my locker as my eyes go wide and my face drops in horror. It was something out of a nightmare, one that you’d only see in dark shows that you would curiously click on

My locker, smeared in the blood of whatever poor animal was foul smelling, the mixture of animal guts, razor blades and thumbtacks more graphic than anything any horror enthusiast could ever dream of seeing I felt my body freeze

The eyes from before Now red and shadows crowded around me and chatter inflicted my thoughts, and the words written in red shined through like some kind of false light at the end of a tunnel

‘Go die, Sl*t’

My breathing was at an all time low and the feeling of ice cold water being dumped on me shook me to the core hot tears streaming down my face as I desperately push through the crowd furiously and fruitlessly wiping at my tears

I don’t know where I’m running to but I force myself to keep going like it’s the only thought my brain can muster the halls fade into a blur and. I think I hear the bell ring for class but I can’t stop I run and run and run until I collide and clash with someone

“(Y/N)? What are you doing don’t you have class? I’ll-“

I his words go in one ear and out the next I don’t even process who it is as a shove past him and out of the school. Like the world is a mirror for my emotions the once sunny sky is dull and pouring as I make my way home.

I opt to walk not wanting to be packed into the bus of the working class commuting to work. I walk as the rain weighs me down and my tears run endlessly I don’t stop until I collapse onti my bed, it isn’t until then that my the vibrating coming from my phone compelled me to open up the nearest social media,

Like opening the door inn a hail storm the news hits me like a ton of bricks, my face is everywhere on every trending page on every blacklist site on every hate forum there I am my vision becomes blurry and one headline stands out to me

“Yumenosaki Producer caught in Relations With Idol”

The media is bias willing to protect their idols more then anything the way that only his face is blurred out, the way that only his name is kept secret is like black and white to the sheer amount of information of me presented like a chef with her finest dish

I don’t have the heart to check the messages be it from the idols I adored so much of the swarms of angry fan girls my body moves on it’s own as I dial the the number, her name feels foreign on my tougue and I resist the urge to hang up.

This is a result of my foolishness, the naïvety of someone blinded by pure love and fascination, the wishful thinking of a girl who only saw the good in everyone squeezing my eyes shut I let the name flow from my mouth as my voice breaks

“Mom?”

-fin-

I wanted to write something for enstars so here I am, I might make this a series so prepare for horribly written angst

Taglist!

#enstars #ensemble stars #eichi tenshouin #enstars x reader #enstars angst #rosuuuu writes #ensemble stars x reader #enstars fanfic