#seems to have the tendency to not onlu care about me deeply despite What Level Friendship IS This

[void-tiger]

Someday I’ll just have my Howl-esque whimsigoth cottage core with geek couture corvid layer. Lots of soft curtains and tapestries and lamps and fairly lights. Me and my cat and my bird. Tea kettle on the stove screaming. Full spice rack.

And if people wanna see me they can come to ME and invite ME out into The Great Outside.

#tiger’s roar #…sorry just. in a mood. #on one hand. mama’s upset. which gets me on edge #on the other. pretty sure I know the chain of events: I admit I’ve been more neurotic than usual ‘cause she keeps going aVOiDiNG yOU #in my ear for. y’know what? months actually #and…if the pattern holds…the person I finally admitted that to y’know. after assuring me things are Fine very calmly and kindly and sweetly #(okay but what if I want a different friendship that whatever this hodgepodge is what then. right. letting it go. can’t force shit. #(and inadvertantly ousted my apparently even deeper than I thought attatchment issues. good grief.) #then…contronted the person who hurt me months ago by claiming I hurt them #who then privately pulled mom aside to apparently apologize? idk the details #and…mom’s now mole hunting. when. it’s me. I’m the mole #because I actually trust someone who. while IDK what to even call this #seems to have the tendency to not onlu care about me deeply despite What Level Friendship IS This #and then go tell people to apologize to me (or my mom apparently) #without…telling me that’s what’s been done but. that seems to. y’know. track. #which…if you really do care I just. I just want an actual rapport vs us dancing around one.