#thats an unstable way to feel like who you are is inherently lovable. you and i both know that and you and i both know why

[snekdood]

No one accepted you and loved you unconditionally and instead of doing it for yourself you take it out on anyone who has figured out how to do it for themselves.

#mood #ig im just builp dipperent #like. no one accepted me for shit either. everyone around me had somethin judgemental to say about me. #but i knew it was important to be myself and i knew how much fun i had being myself and that was the most important thing to me. #i always had more fun being myself even when i was alone than submitting and trying to be someone else to make others happy #idk. ig this is the two sides of where ones life ends up of they actually try to do something about loving themselves instead of tkaing it #out on everyone around you. its not like i dont understand its just not an excuse and it still wasnt okay and you've hurt MANY people. #all bc your heart is so bitter and you cant even being yourself to even imagine loving yourself genuinely. you rely so heavily on everyone #outsid eof you to validate that you're good and lovable but even the people around you have shit to talk to #thats an unstable way to feel like who you are is inherently lovable. you and i both know that and you and i both know why #ig lets keep praying they dont find out. #idk why i do this or try to help you sort through your trauma. i guess i feel so guilty that you have no one to work on this with bc you #probably cant afford a therapist or dont care enough abt yourself to get one. #its not my job to help you introspect but ig for the sake of you learning how important it is to be honest with others but more importantly #yourself i feel some type of obligation. #but i cant keep doing this. i cant keep trying to understand you and your thought process.i cant keep sitting here letting you bully me in #public but we both know you're looking at this sorta shit in private. #i dont deserve to be abused like this and its not my job to make you feel better or figure yourself out or help you work on your trauma #or help you recognize where the bs behavior you have comes from and help you try to work on it to become better #bc truth is. idk if you actually care about being better or you just like to know that i still care about you on some level in spite of #everything youve done. ig im hopeful you can be brought out of your shitty resentful bitter vengeful state against humanity that leads you #to hurt people with no mercy all for your own gain. ig im hopeful you can change but quite honestly its not my job to help you with it #esp with the way you treat me publicly anyways. #part of me really hopes you're not just one of those edgy disecfected people from 4chan or whatever who just doesnt care about hurting ppl #and justifies it bc you think someones cringe. im sure thats what you try to tell everyone im like but im finding more and mkre that #iterally everything you accuse me of is projection. even aside from the sa. just so ppl dont look into your history and focus on attacking #me instead. #hell. i wouldnt be surprised to find out you're a kiwifarmer weaponziing ppl on heres intention to help and be moral and weaponizing #the fact that ppl used to think callouts were the way to do that. literally wouldnt surprise me an inch.