#then why doesn't he love her back? and it's like diana pleaaase he does!! he does so so much!! he just doesn't want to admit it to himself!

[arklay]

oh. just thought about how shit it would feel for diana every time [redacted] is tender with her after she told him she loved him and he hadn't said it back. big oof

#like i have said right like it didn't matter to her if he said it back right? and that she just wanted to tell him cause that's how she #feels and she wanted him to know. and that's all true like if he never says it back then so be it like she will deal with it and move on #(aka her denying she really wants this and just rationalising her emotions rip in pieces) but that doesn't change the fact that her stomach #drops every time whenever he is soft with her because she's still so confused. she doesn't know if he feels anything back for her but then #why would he be so tender with her? she hates that she let herself have feelings for him. hates that she's in love with a man who might not #be able to give that back to her. because for as much as she says she doesn't care for romance or that she doesn't need it deep down she #has always wanted such a connection with someone and she has that with him. they get each other. she's never felt so *known* before but #then why doesn't he love her back? and it's like diana pleaaase he does!! he does so so much!! he just doesn't want to admit it to himself! #like them both just having these overwhelming emotions for each other which they haven't really felt before and both don't know how to deal #with it oughghg and diana just like knowing okay yeah we are friends and he's shown he cares for her but does he love her? and she just #doesn't know. she's so confused. so him being soft always makes her tense up a little bit after she tells him she loves him and he just #stayed quiet. it didn't feel like a slap in the face at a time but after all this time oh boy it sure does now... like arhghghgggh idk if i #am wording what i'm trying to get across properly but i am having so many emotions about them tonight send help #and yeah this was about the somft spicy thought i had like literally okay so beforehand like not even very soft moments but she was #standing in the doorway while he was just relaxing in bed and he reached a hand out and she got so like eeeee right but then sitting on the #edge of the bed and tentatively taking his hand cause her stomach just feels so tight and she's so oughg bye i am passing away #pair: ewskers #leah.txt