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#this is so ooc cuz min would Never take a pic like this but he WOULD grab ryans ass if he wore cunty little bootcuts. so
kindaorangey · 21 days
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did i put ryan in cunty little bootcuts? yes but in my defense i only did it so i could make min-gi grab his ass
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thevioletjones · 4 years
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The Ian & Mickey Show
Week 10
Timestamps
5:47-7:43 - Preview scene where Byron is trying to fix his Vespa while Mickey sits there smoking, and Ian crutches up to return his plaid shirt that may or may not be from the club kiss scene. Mickey doesn’t wanna talk to him. Byron invites Ian to that Imperial Mammoth show, including a plus one, and Mickey gets immediately up in arms about that. Ian lies very obviously and says he met someone and it’s going well, and Mickey is visibly regretting the little game he set off.
15:26-16:51 - Ian takes Grindr pics in the bathroom mirror, looking like a goober who has never pulled a date in his life. Very off brand, really. Liam clowns him hard for being inept, cuz I guess it’s his role to be the greek chorus that’s smarter than everyone else and gives precocious advice. This version of Ian is so dumb that his 12-y/o (or whatever age Liam’s supposed to be now) brother has to tell him that nabbing a gay guy would be easier with a shirtless pic! WOW! Who knew? Thank you, lil love guru.
20:30-21:23 - Ian scrolls Grindr, sifting through dick pics, asshole pics, and orgy propositions. Finally he gets a ping from Cole. Says he looks normal, so obvs he’s not gonna be “normal.”
31:40-32:26 - Ian’s @ The Alibi waiting for Cole to arrive, and they manage to get in a quick dig about Mickey (from Kev this time), and Kev asks Ian what he knows about rich people conspiracy theories, relating to some scheme him and Vee are getting into (I don’t know what it is, cuz fuck the rest of the show). 
33:54-34:37 - Cole arrives at The Alibi like a flamboyant alien of the gods and the music basically stops. His first line delivery is awful, but it gets better after that. This dude just wants to party and have a good time. Living his best shallow life, as you do in your early 20s. Ian is skeptical and the regulars have never seen an episode of Drag Race in their lives, because this gender-bending being is like a foreign concept given the way they gawk. So, by Shameless logic: Hard criminals in prison = Totally down with gay relationships. Alcoholics who live at the dive bar = Never seen a confident guy in a dress.
48:57-50:00 - Mickey is delighted when he sees and hears Cole arriving with Ian. Ian is uncomfortable and confused, because even though he spent months to a year working in a gay club, he’s apparently never interacted with a swishy, superficial, partyboy gay????? But he’s being polite at least. They both watch in amusement as Cole “orders drinks at the bar” by twerking up on it in his lacy ensemble. It’s one of maybe two genuine chuckles I got from all these scenes combined.
53:37-56:07 - Which brings us to the scene we were all waiting for... ready to bring us crashing down to reality for expecting even just a tiny little bit more. Ian is annoyed with Cole, and wanders over near Byron’s table, where of course he overhears him finally admitting his true feelings about Mickey to his friends. In a nutshell, Mickey is the worst. And he has been, to this guy in particular, to be fair. But Ian is not down with the whole talking behind Mickey’s back instead of to his front thing, and he tells him to hold his crutches before punching him. Mickey is next to Cole at the bar now, and Cole is all, “Look at my man. Don’t take no shit. I’m gonna do gymnastics on that dick tonight. I’m gonna Simone Biles that dick, know what I’m sayin’?” And Mickey knocks him out cold. (2nd lulz of the evening there.) Mickey approaches the scene of Ian’s fist “fight” in which Ian has basically just wailed on tiny Barry with no decent return hits, and Ian is already down on his good knee, so he decides this is the right moment to propose again. Says he loves Mickey more than anything and that if he’ll let him, he’d like to spend the rest of his life... and Mickey cuts him off with a sharp, “Save the fuckin’ speech you pussy. Course I’ll marry you.” And they kiss. The camera cuts away. And that’s that. Lol. If you thought you were gonna get any depth added in these last few eps, you were wrong. The next ep will be hilarious hijinks sprinkled with OOC bullshit, and who knows how they’ll manage to fuck up the actual nuptials, but I’m sure it’ll happen. 🍻
56:27-57:52 - IxM arrive back at the Gallagher house looking happy, but they don’t announce their engagement. Instead, Lip announces that he’s moving to Milwaukee with his baby mama and kid.
Episode Tally: 8 scenes. 9 mins 19 secs.
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