#tw; suicide mention

[kitkatopinions]

i dont even understand how CRWBY gives themselves a pat on the back and goes that suicide plot? nailed it 🥃. like bro, you unironically said suicide is badass!!!, made two of your characters off themselves, and IT WAS A GOOD THING??? like, sure ill (begrudgingly) go along with the notion that ascension is not your traditional suicide method where your life ends, HOWEVER the person you were is changed to such an extent that you are rebirthed into something entirely is uhhhh???? did nobody cared enough to stop or question if the portrayal of ascension was fucked? that maybe we shouldnt add cheap shock value???? i am sentencing the writers to write coffee shop aus for all of eternity, they clearly cannot handle anything more sensitive than the awkward tension between ordering an item but being told its sold out.

Bro, that coffee shop thing is so funny. XD

I've often said that the writers clearly can't handle serious topics that require sensitivity, and the whole V9 suicide plot is just proof of that. Imagine looking at a plot where you have one girl who was bullied into suicide but then gets an 'are you sure' menu screen while all her friends are smiling and happy and saying that if she decides to kill herself for real then they'll be happy, and then you have another girl who actively does kill herself and it's treated as 'thet best thing for her' and then being like.... "Yeah, it's good, let's drop it."

Couldn't be me.

#rwde #tw; suicide mention #trigger warning; suicide #tw; suicide

[avilionea]

@amantesmultorum (SWEENEY TODD)

"No!" Lucy had both hands in her matted hair, pacing about the apartment, trying to get past him and out of what she thought was harms way. "Ain't never did nobody no harm. Not even picked lint out of a pocket, I did. Been a good girl, I have. kept me hands to me-self. "They'd cut her hair in prison shortly after her 'accident'. the mandatory six months in a cell awaiting a trial to determine the cause of her 'accident' was time Lucy had thought was sealed in a very common sentence. She'd have gotten her intended exit in the end, as the common federal punishment for such self-murder was often met with a noose.

The laws were different now. Her girl was ripped from her because of it now.

She would often pull at the golden curls atop her head when she was anxious, but that was long before all this. Now, her hair was discolored from dirt and unable to form a single ringlet. There may have been a hairpin or two lost within the matted tangles, rusting away. She could only rest her hands atop the matting. Lucy didn't pay any attention to the lice or other bugs that had made what she called her hair now home.

"No, sir, never sold what wasn't mine, never took nothin' neither. I'm a good girl, I am. No sheers to my head, no debt, no bars. free lady now, I am. I did it , served it. Won't hurt nobody, not me either, no more. " She shook her head, "healthy, too! No sickness what needs flyin' out! No doctor says I needs it. No sheers, sir. No!"

#amantesmultorum #c; lucy #V:? #tw; suicide mention #this is sort a clunky I'm sorry. if you need anything changed let me know!

[avastyetwats]

Stede Bonnet - Open Starter #2

Bang.

The bullet flies past the makeshift dummy's head and connects with the wall behind it, right next to the door leading to his quarters.

"You're pathetic." He can hear his father's voice so clearly, he can see the look of hatred and disappointment in his eyes.

Another gunshot. Another miss.

"Weak." Another gunshot and this time it hits the dummy's shoulder, but it wasn't good enough for Stede. Because that isn't where he was aiming.

"Lily-livered." Tears fill Stede's eyes now, obscuring his target. "Rich boy and that's all you'll ever be. You'll never amount to anything!" Stede pulls the trigger, but nothing happens.

It's empty.

He throws the gun onto the ground and unsheathes his sword, storming towards the dummy.

"Baby bonnet!" He can hear Nigel Badminton's laugh now, but not just his - there's so many others. And they're all laughing. "Silly! Outlandish! Pathetic!"

He raises his sword and slashes downward, slicing the old shirt open. "You're no pirate! You're barely even a man!" Anger, shame, and pain fuels him as he slices at the dummy over and over and over, tears spilling from his eyes. He can't stop himself from crying no matter how hard he tries. He's pathetic. He's weak.

"You let me get away. Your plan failed, just like you always do! You're a failure, you're nothing!" Now it's Ricky's voice. The man that took so many lives because of Stede, the man that almost killed Izzy. He turned Ricky into their biggest enemy yet, just as he turned Ed into Blackbeard when he fled. When he ran. Because he was afraid. Because he was a coward.

"It's all your fault! People died because of you, Israel almost died because of you!" This time it isn't his father's voice. It isn't Nigel's voice. It isn't Ricky's voice.

It's his own.

He stabs his sword into the dummy's abdomen once, and then twice, and thrice, brutally running it through as the rage fills him. He's breaking. He's trying desperately to keep himself from shattering, but he's failing. He's always failing.

He stabs the dummy once more and this time, he can't pull his sword out. He pulls and pulls, but to no avail, so with a howl of anger, Stede releases the handle and uses his fists instead, punching the dummy's face over and over and over again until his knuckles start to bleed. "IT'S MY FAULT!" Stede cries out as he beats on the dummy, ignoring the searing pain in his hands. He deserves it anyway, doesn't he? "IT'S ALL MY FAULT!" Innocent people died because of him. The blood was on his hands. Not Blackbeard's, not Ricky's, but his. He'd been the cause of it all. Izzy's life nearly lost because of him. Because of his plan.

It's only suicide if we die. And they almost did. Israel almost did. God, he was an idiot. He was a failure. He didn't belong out here. He was no Captain. He was no pirate. He was no man. Not a good one. Everyone was right... everyone was right.

With a cry of pure anguish, Stede collapses. He shatters completely. His knees hit the floor as he grabs onto his head, sobbing loudly into the otherwise quiet night. Blood drips from his knuckles, adding to the blood he already had on his hands, as the heartbreaking cries rip through him, his body shaking, his stomach churning painfully, his heart shattered.

Stede Bonnet, not a Gentleman Pirate, but a broken man.

#soooo i felt in the mood for angst #and i can absolutely see stede breaking after everything that happened #he has blood on his hands - he feels at fault for so much that happened #including izzy's death or in this case his almost death cause izzy's alive idc #everyone has broken down in this show and now it's stede #understandably so #he left ed and look what happened. he left ricky behind and look what happened #even if he isn't entirely to blame he feels at fault for so much of it so i want to explore that #open starter #c; stede bonnet #tw; bullying #tw; suicide mention

[terrence-silver]

You wrote something before about older terry poisoning himself and beloved so he can have beloved forever, but what if beloved didn’t wake up and terry did? How would he react seeing beloved in that state because of something he did?

Isn't it deeply ironic? That a cobra didn't die from its own venom?

His grief is disastrous as he finds beloved's lifeless, limp form and gets to experience what he did, and planned to do to himself, to no avail, firsthand, overtaken by panic, anger, wrath, several different types of anguish and an immediate loss of control as he cradles their body and just vails, laughing, crying, cackling and seething all at once --- his outburst terrible to behold lest of all imagine as he realizes that they've passed away and he hasn't. That he is just that much stronger and more resilient than them and this is the one time he might regret that fact; he is beyond himself that he couldn't even ritualistically die when he firmly decided upon it, and instead, he meets obstacles even there. Rings especially true if this is old man Terry and the reason why he even decided upon an action this drastic is because of his own age the fact that he could never experience a full life with beloved and such, his goal was absolute ---- he will go and take beloved with him on his own terms, when he chooses, instead of helplessly waiting for the final outcome. Yet, there is now more than ever all the more reason to die, he feels. He's killed the love of his life, and they wont be stolen from him by death. No. Not without him devotedly following suit and taking full control of the situation in the most harrowing way possible, jealous even at the prospect of being outmanoeuvred by the effects of his own poison. Jealous that he and beloved haven't gone together. He does it the way he figures a Samurai would've done it in centuries bygone, even though, half-maddened by now, he might be amused with the gruesomeness of the situation. The slight irony of him as a Samurai. Him of all people. He utilizes one of the Seppuku ritual blades from his vast collection and impales himself on it beside beloved, ever taking his eyes off of them, making it hurt. There's shades of Romeo and Juliet to this, in a messed up, fucked up way, he realizes, and he was always meant to die on the battlefield. Maybe this is a sort of battlefield too.

#terry silver #kk3 #cobra kai #tw; suicide mention #terry silver x reader #terry silver x beloved #tw; dark topics #old man terry #tw; age gap

[jxgi]

notable medical / health - physical

he needs this like heid needs this; i wanted to make a little write up of jagi's physical health and things that may be referenced in threads etc.

head scar / trauma / brain damage -

the most obvious is his head scar / face scar. for anybody who doesn't know; after a fight with his brother, his brother used a technique to essentially swell jagi's brain and kill him. this WOULD have killed him but jag, being the stubborn bastard he is - decided to nail metal into his head to stop the swelling / injury. on the right side of head, he has this metal scar with wires that pump blood and keep him alive.

he also suffered some brain damage from this injury.

he is ALWAYS in pain with this injury. it's pure agony; not much distracts him from it. but he will welcome any kind of relief. if your muse wants to control jag in some way, perhaps they can offer him pain relief - he might just be there friend :eyes:

here is an image of what this looks like; the depiction varies dependent on which manga, anime, game etc you see so i'm going to use this reference as it's most clear / my favourite.

regarding jagi's brain damage - i like to think that he has odd mannerisms spotted when with him for a long time; he blinks unequally, his pupils are always tiny, he twitches and can sometimes appear as if under the influence of drugs ( he isn't ).

he also sees a demonic figure from time to time ( the one his mask is inspired by, as seen in the gaiden manga ) and it also speaks to him. this is purely as a result of his brain damage. when alone, he will sometimes talk to himself or mumble - his mumbles border on an almost indecipherable rambling, but to jag, he can see / hear something that nobody else can. this is purely his head playing tricks on him.

old leg injury -

his leg injury is inspired by ken's rage, as i noticed he has a bandage around his right leg - i like to think that he once badly broke his leg whilst in the dojo as a teen and the injury never quite settled. even with toki's healing and ryuken's orders to 'take it easy', jagi just couldn't and insisted on using it, thus damaging it further.

ever since, it's given him slight discomfort / pain but nothing unbearable. his attention when it comes to pain is entirely distracted by the throbbing pain in his skull, so he isn't too bothered by his old leg wound. it is something that can be sensitive, mind you, and is another reason for him using his motorbike to get around everywhere.

scars on torso / self-harm -

the scars on his torso are supposed to imitate kenshiro's as to impersonate him - they are real. jag gave them to himself; he stabbed himself multiple times with a knife, digging the circular scars into his torso. he did this in a fit of madness shortly after receiving his head injury.

on this note, jag is no stranger to self harm. he has stabbed himself with a pipe through the hip before during a suicide attempt and when younger, would regularly cut into his thighs.

if asked of these wounds - he'll play them off as being wounds caused while training / fighting in battle. only toki knows their true origin.

#.headcanon #you can tell me jag wouldnt self-harm bla bla but we've literally seen him in canon stab himself multiple times #you cant tell me this man doesnt have some serious issues #tw; self harm #tw; mutiliation #tw; blood #tw; wounds #tw; suicide mention

[melly0990]

An au whare tekken and bungou stray dogs take place in the same universe and the characters from both series interact

(Bungou stray dogs Season 4 spoilers for a certain characters backstory so scroll down and don't look at the post or just don't look at the post if you don't want spoilers)

The bsd characters would be pretty surprised to find that there are non ability users who are fully capable of fighting

Atsushi would understand jin with his struggle of trying to control the devil gene but be conflicted with him as well since he did cause wars and chaos in the world

Dazai would ask Lee if he knows any beautiful ladies he can commit suicide with, Lee was disturbed by that question at first then composes himself and answers

Lee: well yes I do know one beautiful lady you could commit suicide with

Dazai: really?:D

Lee: and her name is mental hospital

Dazai: you know what i'll pass 😑

Kunikida would talk with lars about how he wants to live up to his ideals and the justice it brings, lars would encourage him to keep fighting for his ideals that there are people he won't be able to save but he's gotta save who he can, Kunikida takes those words to heart

Lei wouldn't belive ranpo's claims of being the best detective in the world and assume he's just a little kid, ranpo would be annoyed by that tell him he's 26 and proves to him that he is a great detective by using ultra deduction guesses things and surprises lei as well as impress him

Xiaoyu and alisa would act like big sister figures to kyouka showing her some clothes shops ,eating crepes with her (with atsushi and lucy) and Xiaoyu would have kyouka pet panda whom kyouka would finds very soft

Yosano would dislike dragunov's nickname "the white angel of death" as that's what the soldier called her right before he died in her backstory other than that she's neutral on him

I honestly think chuuya and hwoarng have similar personalities but I think they would get at each other's nerves and hwoarng would challenge chuuya to a fight (which he losses every time cuz chuuya's very op)

Feng Wei would see kenji beating a bear that isn't Kuma (reason why kenji beated said bear was cuz the bear attacked him and kenji was trying to protect himself he even checked if the bear was ok after he beat it) be shocked of the farmer boy easily beating a bear with his own hands and since he like strong opponents he challenges kenji to a fight to test his strength which kenji is like "okie sure!"

Akutagawa and Miguel would get into a fight, akutagawa is surprised that a non ability user has stood up to him and thinks of knocking him out and bringing to mafia hq for questioning on how he was able to go toe to toe with an ability user (if your wondering why he doesn't think of killing him its cuz this is after season 3 akutagawa whare he promises atsushi not to kill anyone in 6 months) so he tied up Miguel and was about to knock him out only for Miguel thinking he would die since he was fighting a wanted killer said something quietly like " I guess I'll see you again soon sis" making akutagawa stop and ask him this

Akutagawa: do you have a little sister?

Miguel: yea what's it to ya?

Then akutagawa left Miguel by himself and leaved the place they were fighting in

King would see atsushi's tiger abilities when atsushi is dealing with some low life criminals and accidentally saw his scar they would talk asking him whare he got his scar from atsushi just remarks he got it in an orphanage whare the headmaster did that to him king would feel bad for him for what he's gone through and would also give him advice about some stuff, atsushi feels reassured and comfortable by those advices and also thinks his jaguar mask looks cool they talk for a while then they leave and king is more determined then ever to not only raise money for orphanages but also make sure the caretakers at the orphanage are not abusive bastards like with atsushi's caretakers at his own orphanage

#tekken #bsd #Bungou stray dogs #i couldn't really find any characters for kazuya and heihachi to interact with #i thought maybe heihachi interacting with kouyou and be uncomfortable around her cuz her attitude and elegance remind him of his wife #but i thought thats kinda a stretch so i didnt do it #not gonna tag every characters name here cuz theres a lot #TW; suicide mention #warning; suicide mention

[happybird16]

kill yourself

Um.. hi? Never send this to someone? Ever. As someone who has had issues in the past this is very dangerous! I'm actually very upset rn.

I got this an hour ago and i'm not sure what prompted it? Please seek help and rethink your actions

#tw; suicide mention #tw; threats #anons #i'm actually genuinely upset and i was doing well #:((( #i'm gunna delete this in a couple hours

[starjynx]

This quiz didn't have to come for my baby boy like this... ( placing reference under the cut because of trigger warning. )

#【🌺】❛ Jazzy Babbling ❜ ( ooc ) #【✨】Fandom: ❛ Tokyo Revengers ❜ #tw; suicide #tw; suicide mention #{ tagging just in case }

[ladyimaginarium]

its my& two cousins' funerals today but idk when exactly it is bc their brother is a fucking idiot who can't make up his fucking mind. anyway i&. sometimes i& think about how my& family is just. so cursed. substance abuse runs so heavily in the family tree & its even more prominent bc we're native. & its sad. its really fucking sad. one of them died to chronic illness that i& cant bring myself& to name for some reason & i& was one of the last ones to see him before he died. the other died due to substance abuse complications. he just. let himself go in the hospital after an overdose in the snow. but they both loved me& deeply. they did things for me& that they never did for other people. the former lost his little brother as a child in an accident when they were sliding in the middle of the road - the same road in my& driveway - in winter when a car hit them & ever since he was blamed for it & teased for it by the other children at school & i& think that fucked him up for the rest of his life even if he stopped drinking afterward in the last few years of his life. the latter lost his beloved wife & never recovered. grief is so tangible in the family tree & i& fear it's latched itself onto me& although ive& never taken substances & don't plan to except for the occasional w33d. so many of my& family members died due to substance abuse issues, even ones i& never knew. two other cousins, twins, lost their lives one after the other due to substance abuse. another cousin committed suicide in his own family's house years before i& was born - & a house i& visited years afterward - because he couldn't handle his grief.

this is indigenous intergenerational trauma.

#arcana.vents #tw; antinative racism #tw; substance abuse #tw; chronic illness #tw; drugs #tw; suicide mention

[kitkatopinions]

I got into this argument recently over the whole “V9 is pro-suicide” thing (it is) and, despite the fact this other person agreed that Ascension is an allegory for suicide, they kept on saying that when I looked at the story through that lens I was “taking it too literally because it’s a fairy tale”

Like… what’s the point in even reading a story if you’re NOT supposed to buy into what they’re trying to say with said story? Am I supposed to ignore all of the characters and the literal world of the story saying that “Ascension is actually a good thing that people should go through” and how Ascension throughout the entire volume is framed as death?

Or how, before Ruby ascends in the first place, she literally says “I don’t want to be me anymore” after being brutalized and then drinks a substance she believes will actively kill herself?

I was told over and over again that “because Ruby chose herself it’s anti-suicide,” but the entire reason she gets to CHOOSE IN THE FIRST PLACE is because she killed herself? The entire thing is a glorified way of saying “if you like yourself, you’ll become a better person for it because you’ll magically realize that you’re perfect the way you are” when that’s literally not true and not how it works?

I’m sorry this is going on for so long. I just wanted to see a different perspective. V9 has consistently fucked me up as a survivor of suicide and I just don’t understand how people can vehemently say that there’s nothing equating to suicide or pro-suicide messaging in this story when they literally admit constantly that suicide is present in the narrative.

I am really upset about whoever this other person is admitting that Ascension is an allegory for suicide but taking the stance of 'but we're not supposed to think about it because this is like a fairy tale.' Does that person not understand fairy tales? Most of them have lessons baked into them. Does that person not understand how media works? Most media has something under the surface, some sort of meaning or intended takeaway or even accidental biases on the part of the writers baked into them. You can watch even the most stupid just there for pure entertainment piece of media - You can watch Alvin and the Chipmunks 2007 and still come out of it understanding that in-between the CGI Chipmunks singing songs and the bad charmless acting of the guy who played Dave (my sis and I believe that role should've instead been played by Brendan Fraser,) you're supposed to get the take-away that kids should be allowed to be treated like kids and not used just for money-making and that found family is valuable and should be embraced and not pushed away out of fear of commitment. RWBY should tell us something, it should have messages and takeaways, especially because the very start of rwby presents us with the conflicting beliefs of Salem and Ozpin - Salem insisting that mankind's passion and strength will always wane and darkness will take over, with Ozpin countering that mankind's victory will be found in 'the simpler things she's long forgotten, things that require a smaller, more honest soul' while we see Ruby. The entire thing is full of (admittedly contradictory) morals and take-aways and meanings. Some of them are bad, some of them reflect the biases of the writers, or the bigotry that Miles Luna and Kerry Shawcross never deconstructed. It's not just there to be pretty lights, and it's actually imo wildly irresponsible for people to not try to analyze rwby.

"Yeah, Ascension is like suicide, but we're not meant to think about it" that person can fuck off. The trend of 'media isn't meant to be critically consumed or analyzed, it's just there for us to like and have fun' is the worst and it's destroying thoughtful media. I swear to God if the Lord of the Rings movies came out today people would be like "yeah I guess it's probably informed by Tolkien's time in war or whatever, but we're not supposed to think about it or take it seriously, it's just a make-believe story."

(I will be talking about Ruby's attempted suicide down below, please be advised and don't read if that sort of thing might be triggering to you.)

Also, on the note of "because Ruby chose herself in the end, it's anti-suicide' that really is just... Wildly wrong. Ruby chose to commit suicide. She thought that drinking the tea was going to essentially remove her from existence, erase all her memories, transform her body into something else, that she would not be 'Ruby Rose' at all and would instead be replaced by someone better. That is her hating herself, that is her wanting to die. Just because she thought something else would take her place doesn't mean she herself wasn't trying to commit suicide. Basically what the rwby writers wrote was the equivalent of a story where a girl pops pills in an attempt to kill herself, but is clinging to life, and while she's lying on her deathbed, her consciousness meets God and they give her the choice to either die or wake up, and she decides to wake up. Although this in and of itself would be incredibly dicey (irl people don't get to decide POST-ATTEMPT whether they really want to go through with it while getting the option to see their long dead mom and get assurance of her affection before they choose, and acting like that's the case is damaging especially to teens and kids,) the rwby writers make it worse! They make it worse by showing Ruby's closest friends including her older sister essentially sit around her bedside having smiling happy chats with each other and assuring each other that they'll be happy for Ruby if she DOES choose to die and that it's her choice and that it could be a good thing.

This is so damaging. And it's so damaging to show Ruby just coming out of it unscathed, smiling, having her role as a leader back and accepting it with happiness, having her struggles just waved away as if they hadn't happened. It's an allegory for a suicide where Ruby gets an 'are you sure about this' menu screen that people irl don't ever get, gets to see her mom and hear her mom say she loves her which people irl don't get, gets to talk to God and be told 'encouraging things' which is something people irl don't get, and gets to come out of it seemingly better than ever with no consequences which is something people irl don't get, and her friends and family don't have to grapple with what happened because they can just dismiss it as 'Ruby choosing to go to therapy' essentially somehow, and then the whole thing is just left in the past - while NEO COMMITS SUICIDE TOO AND IT'S TREATED LIKE A GOOD THING DESPITE THE FACT THAT THERE IS NO REASON TO BELIEVE SHE'LL 'CHOOSE HERSELF.' Which just makes the allegory three hundred times more damaging if you ask me.

On top of how bad that is, we have the Paper Pleasers, we have an example of people that didn't come back as themselves, but as entirely new people. They killed themselves, and didn't 'chose themselves,' instead destroying their bodies and their memories, essentially wiping themselves from existence, and it was framed as an exclusively good thing that Jaune needed to recognize was just a part of letting people make their own choices - framed alongside not only the fact that Ruby herself had yet to choose to come back as herself but also the fact that Penny just chose to die in the last season after begging for death over and over and getting Jaune himself to help her commit suicide... That lesson is so much worse. The paper pleasers killing themselves was presented in the narrative of RWBY as a positive, good thing despite the fact that they did not come back as themselves. If what happened to Ruby is the equivalent of someone popping pills and miraculously surviving by meeting God and getting the choice to return, the Paper Pleasers are the equivalent to an entire village of people willingly drinking poison in an attempt to meet God because they believe they'll ascend and shed their mortal forms so they can no longer be damaged and may carry on their assigned duty and reason for living as perfect creatures, and... Where have I heard that before? And the rwby writers present it as a good thing they were right about! The rwby writers present suicide as not only a sometimes good choice that helps you grow, but a needed choice that you're worse off for not taking - and coupled with Penny, it's horrible.

People have this idea that because Ruby, Neo, and the Paper Pleasers believed that something would continue on living from the remnants of who they once were, it's not suicide, but... That's very much so the way I thought about suicide growing up as an evangelical Christian. When I struggled with thoughts of suicide in my early teen years, that’s how I thought of it, and realizing that my friends and family WOULD care and WOULDN'T be able to accept it and WOULDN'T think of it as a good thing was one of the things that helped me start to get better. If I had seen RWBY in those days, seeing volume nine and seeing them praise the suicide of the people pleasers while smilingly deciding they'd be happy if Ruby destroyed herself would've fucked me up, and as it is right now, it was still triggering and upsetting to me.

I'm so sorry that this season was hard for you as a survivor of suicide, and that people are being so willfully stubborn in their refusal to see how damaging it was. What the rwby writers may have been intending to make - a story about a suicidal girl realizing she is enough - is not what they actually put into their show. Instead, accidentally or otherwise, they glorified suicide in incredibly damaging ways, and the fans need to recognize that. They need to stop with their 'tree therapy' jokes and their 'drink the tea' cracks, and just accept that the writers got it wrong. Saying 'it's just a fairy tale so why would I think about it' is a ridiculously stupid cop-out. Like, if people aren't even thinking through anything in RWBY, then why are they even watching it? If people aren't engaging with it, aren't getting anything out of it, won't even try to think about the themes and morals and what's being communicated, then why watch it in the first place?

#rwde #tw; suicide mention #tw; suicide #trigger warning; suicide mention

[lllluka]

someone tell twt that sui jokes aren't and have never been funny

#tw; suicide mention #i had to recently mourn the loss of ANOTHER family member to sui and while i was like. heading to the funeral my entire twt tl was just. #that.

[multi-scrapbook]

@nuravity liked for a Ghost Izuku Starter!

Izuku was floating. He sometimes did that, drifting high in the air, above the clouds, staring at nothing and trying to just find a moment of calm. It usually wasn't a happy sort of calm. It was a lot like what he imagined drowning would be like, as a kid (and he was not going to introspect about why he used to fantasize about that, absolutely not). Drifting, not breathing, watching the endless blue sky above him as he just slowly stopped thinking...

He was older and, he hoped, a little wiser at that point. Drowning would come with a messy, ugly struggle as his body tried desperately to survive, no matter what he thought about that. Or, it probably would, if he wasn't dead already and freed from the burden of needing to breathe in the first place.

He was a bit caught up in those thoughts, so he didn't really notice that he wasn't the only one floating up there that day, not for a few seconds. He jolted when he did notice, though, and quickly turned so he was upright instead of laying down in the air.

"Oh! Uraraka!" he said, giving her a bright smile. "Did you come up here to talk to me about something?"

#Izuku; ic #Izuku; Don't Give Up Your Ghost #tw; suicide mention

[starborn-souls]

Parents, and more specifically shitty parents, is a really easy button to push to get Pixie pissed off or at the very least in an irritable mood. Especially if it’s in regards to someone close to her.

Her relationships with her family, her mother especially, are strained at best. There’s a reason why Pixie rarely calls home, and even then those rare times are to her brother.

The origin of things becoming fractured is simple. Pixies parents didn’t want her going into the active duty when she just lost an arm as a reservist and had a child. And Pixie would have killed herself if she spent another day as a civilian. She knows that for certain, she came close once or twice. Only her younger brother knows that however, and she made him promise never to tell their parents about it.

And besides that, well, Pixie’s family is full of stubborn fuckers who even after ten years want her to leave the service. And make that no secret whatsoever the few conversations they still have every once in a while, regardless of who it is, with Arnold being the only exception.

There’s other factors too that have driven a wedge into her relationships but just aren’t as relevant or didn’t enter the picture right away. Her sister Lisa’s job as a journalist and Pixie’s refusal to even say what she does now beyond ‘intelligence’ being two of them.

In all honesty, if it weren’t for Evie, Pixie wouldn’t bother keeping in contact with anyone besides her brother at all. As far as she’s concerned, they’ve made their views clear and so has she. And nothings seemed to change so she doesn’t see the point in trying.

But, all that to say, her problems with her family all ultimately stem from those involved all caring too much if anything, even if it’s not showed in the healthiest of ways. On her side of things, her distance from Evie is because she cares, because she doesn’t think she’d be a good mother to her and she’d just do her little girl more harm than good by being around in her current mental state.

So to see or hear about those close to her dealing with shitty parents or parents that just don’t give a fuck? It pisses her off to no end because yeah, sure, her relationship with her parents sucks but at least she knows they care. And yeah, she is far from a perfect mother but at least she’s trying and doing what she can given the circumstances without potentially negatively affecting Evie.

It’s a sore spot for her, and even with her usual civility and level-headedness, she won’t hesitate to call that shit out if she sees or hears about it.

#yes I’ve discussed some of these here before #but y’know what #previously revealed details relevant to the New Point #so it’s fine #Red Simmons // Pixie (mw2 verse) #truths brought to light // headcanons and lore #tw; suicide mention #realized it probably sounds like I’m rambling her #oops #I had Organized Thoughts when I was first writing the post but well #post dinner schleepy hit #but I wanted to finish it so it wouldn’t just be damned to the drafts lol #dust in the wind // mobile #think that’s the tag lol

[julianobungus]

This is really dark but did Belos in your Baby Bel AU ever attempt suicide?

While he never did, he certainly considered it. This only ever happened when he wasn't regressed. After a couple of months, he eventually caves and tells Luz and Hunter, who take extra turns watching him.

#tw; suicide mention #tw; suicide #dead dove do not eat #dead dove #Baby Belos AU

[cwarscars]

the sins of his father

tw // child abuse mention & suicide mention

it’s no secret that i write heidegger essentially being the carbon copy of who his father was before him. however, i write them with one difference to each other. 

heidegger is a monster to his underlings / enemies. his father was a monster to his own family. 

SO - 

basically, 

heidegger’s father was a man who ruled with an iron fist. he started his own militia at a young age and went from somebody of lower status & class to somebody who’s attention and time was demanded by the upper class and the wealthy. heidegger sr was efficient and strong - he’d clawed his way up from the absolute bottom of society & so, when he became an upper class man himself / wealthy, he held this view of the world that you have to seize whatever it is that you want with both hands.

when it came to his family - he married the first rich woman to give him the eye ( one, lady cassandra ) and the two had a son (magnar). proud to have had a son, heidegger sr raised his boy to only ever be strong. to never falter in the face of anything. he taught him every toxic masculinity trait he could. 

the boy couldn’t cry, couldn’t show weakness. the boy had to be a man. 

and were magnar at all out of line (or what his father considered to be out of line) he would be beaten senseless by his dad. the old man also had a penchant for picking on his wife, too. who quickly took to drinking to ease that sorrow. 

now, when it comes to heidegger (aka, magnar) - though he follows his fathers footsteps in the way that he’s hyper-masculine, doesn’t believe in ‘weakness’ bla bla toxic traits. he absolutely does not follow the abusive father route. heidegger picks on his soldiers, he’ll batter the men beneath him because he’s got this view that they need toughening up. 

when it comes to his own daughters / even his ex-wife; heidegger doesn’t bother to get physical or even verbally abusive with them because he knows how terrible it is to be raised that way. he wont go on a spiel about emotions or how it ‘made him feel’ but will instead talk as if it wasn’t a ‘practical way’ to raise a child. 

in truth, heidegger would never hurt his own kids (or anyone else’s) or a spouse because he’s seen the effects it would have on those involved. he isn’t for a second, ‘soppy’ about it. he wont be talking to a therapist any time soon about these issues or ever even admit to it - it’s just a part of him that differs from his father.

it also goes to say that - while heidegger is proud to be like his father in the sense that he now reflects the man’s war prowess; when compared to him (which would happen a lot when he was younger) it actually irks him. it’s the one way to make him angry without him lashing out shouting. he’ll just quietly become indifferent to the rest of the conversation. 

heidegger hated his father.

as a side note to all of this // when i originally wrote about heidegger’s relationship with his father, i implied that he eventually murdered his father. i’ve changed this. heidegger’s father committed suicide when he was in his early twenties. he heard of this whilst on a mission with his platoon at the time. 

#(headcanon) #tw; child abuse mention #tw; suicide mention #(queue; open the door get on the floor everybody walk the dinosaur)

[twinkuraba]

I never even heard the word ‘transgender’ until I was about 16. Didn’t stop me from having the Trans Child experience. I just didn’t know that’s what it was at the time.

It’s a horrible feeling; not having the words to define why your body feels wrong. To not know how to express the mental flinch whenever you’d be socially punished for not performing your AGAB adequately. Being uncomfortable being grouped in with the girls but not being able to point to a reason why.

For thinking that you were the one doing something wrong, clearly. Adults knew everything and none of them were talking about anyone else who felt this way, your peers never talked about feeling this way, so clearly the issue was with you.

I was never a girly child, or even a tomboyish one. I was the ‘weirdo’ everyone avoided because I didn’t act like a ‘girl’ was supposed to but I wasn’t a tomboy. My peers were confused when instead of being excited about having ‘early beauty’ when I started puberty at 10, I felt disgusted and betrayed by my body, I felt like it wasn’t mine, like I was being controlled by it instead of the other way around.

I need to repeat; I had never heard about the concept of being trans at this point. I only vaguely even knew that being gay was a thing people could be. I went to a religious school so that’s likely part of it but no amount of ‘you are perfect just how you are’ could counter my revulsion of an afab body.

Cue high school where I met my first trans person; a friend of a friend. And it still didn’t click for me then because I was heavy in the ‘repress all the bad and everything will be fine’ method of coping with stress, self hatred, undiagnosed ADHD/Autism and depression/anxiety.

Unsurprisingly. I went to a very dark place where I couldn’t imagine myself having a future like this. I hated my body and what it stood for. What everyone else assumed of me when they saw a teen girl’s body, how I hated having to perform feminine and why did I want to be a boy so badly when I was supposed to be perfect how I was?

I got very close to attempting suicide twice in my life. Both times I was talked down by a queer friend because I was hiding my pain from my family, but after the second one I decided this couldn’t continue so I made the tough (at the time) decision to tell them what I’d been planning.

The rest of my life until I was well into my 20s was basically me moving through my life shrouded in fog. I wasn’t happy with who I was, but I knew suicide wasn’t the answer to how I was feeling. I tried to learn how to love myself again, and in little ways I did. I rediscovered my love for my artistic ability. My eye colour. My taste in music.

But I could never even begin to figure out how to feel about being a woman. Other women were amazing, I admired them for being so sure, so confident in themselves, so brave for living with what I was feeling was a personal hell.

Then I found out that actual women... like being women. They have their feelings about gender inequality or the societal expectations on AFAB people but on the whole they’d never ever been confused about who they were.

Then one day, talking to a friend. It clicked. All my feelings, my past experiences. I hadn’t had the words for it then, but I had been a trans boy trying to navigate a cis girl’s world blindfolded without even a map to help me find my way.

And according to everyone who knows me from then to now the change has been enormous lmao. I talk more with people, I have more pride in my appearance, more smiles and laughs, less self-hate.

I’m not 100% where I want to be yet, and I’m still bad at envisioning the future. But at least I know with certainty that I have one now.

#Umbral chats #long post #TW; suicide mention #I dunno I'm feeling reflective and shit