#victória vents ✶

[strongheartneteyam]

God... what I've been fearing is actually happening... a lot of the people who were in the Avatar fandom are actually slowly going away, leaving their Avatar tumblrs behind or focusing way more on other fandoms... the fandom seemed so big in the beginning and that made me incredibly happy but I'm seeing that it was mostly just a hype for a lot of people and once it slowly started going away, the movie not being a new thing anymore for them, it being available to stream at anytime they wanted on Disney+ (for those who have it), the next movies releases being postponed... that was it for a lot of people. And I totally understand y'all, I promise I'm NOT judging anyone. Of course not everyone was gonna stay in the fandom n feel so deeply touched by the Avatar Universe like a lot of us (me included) do and they would eventually wanna move on. That's natural and normal. Everyone is different. Nothing wrong with that. I guess I just got really attached to how cool and big and warm our Avatar obsessed community was in the beginning and now that the fandom is getting smaller and a lot of people are leaving their blogs behind or not being that active anymore, it feels like I'm losing something special, y'know? I know there will always be a fandom, even if small... but I miss how it was in the beginning. It makes my heart hurt, if I'm being honest. And yes, guys, I am a really emotional person lol But anyway, does anyone relate to what I'm feeling? I hope I'm not alone when it comes to feeling like this lol

#꒰ა victória speaks ໒꒱ #victória vents ✶

[portraitinblacknblue]

.

#hi it's been so long since i vent here #don't read #i am just so afraid.. #of everything #everything terrifies me i can't deal #i thought i was so ok with how things are going but i am not. i am not. i have so much fear. so much incertainity #i just want to be able to breath #i am trying so hard to keep my thoughts and attitude positive and remember that my brain is lying.. #things ARE going to be ok. everything IS going to be fine. people you love ARE NOT leaving you. please please believe this victória #it's true #you know it is #...sighs #delete later ??

[strongheartneteyam]

IMPORTANT MESSAGE FOR THE FANDOM:

The hate and competition in this fandom tires me, honestly. I'm SO grateful that I made wonderful Avatar loving friends outside tumblr and here but like one of my dear Avatar loving friends has said "Tumblr is sick. I stay away from there and keep posting my content on my other socials." The Tumblr Avatar fandom is turning into an unpleasant thing, instead of a good one. I'm so so glad for the dear friends I have here. Many blogs here are incredibly lovely to me and to other people. But a lot of the fandom is just stupid and sad. I don't care about losing followers or about my reputation or whatever bc I don't owe anybody anything so I will be the one to be bold n brave and talk about this problem. The Avatar fandom on Tumblr is freaking toxic and exhausting. I haven't received a lot of hate but I see so many wonderful people here suffering and it just makes me extremely angry because I am a calmer person but if there's one thing I HATE is injustice. Anonymous haters are cowards n pathetic. Animosity among writers is stupid as fuck. Competition is even more ridiculous. We are all just fans writing, we should be united and have fun and be creative together. I have dreamed of being a published author ever since I was a child (and writing fanfiction is also a way to sharpen my skills because soon enough I will be publishing a book) and I write mostly for me, because it helps me, because writing is like an spiritual experience for me, and because I love the idea of touching people with my stories. To make them laugh, cry, get scared, confused, hopeful, emotional, HORNY ahaha Anyways, that is why we should all write. Because it's our passion. Not to have followers and be "Tumblr famous". But... humans gonna human. My point is, let's be kind to one another. Let's not send anonymous hate to innocent people. Let's remember we are all humans and we should be good to each other and not be jerks. If Eywa looked at the Tumblr fandom, she would laugh and say "Dumb humans. They cannot learn." and I think there's still hope that we can change and please the Great Mother a bit more, mmkay? That's it.

PS: there's life outside Tumblr. Some of you guys take this place too seriously. It's not that deep.

#꒰ა victória speaks ໒꒱ #victória vents ✶ #avatar fandom #avatar james cameron #avatar the way of water #atwow fanfiction #avatar twow #avatar 2009 #sully family #pandora avatar #neteyam sully #jake sully

[strongheartneteyam]

Most of the friends I made here (I have like 5 added on Discord thank God) that I used to talk to about Avatar with are inactive/have left their blogs behind and I'm so sad I miss them :( What am I gonna do? Need more ppl to talk about Avatar with... I take long to answer because my life is totally chaotic and I'm chronically ill so I'm always tired but I come back often and answer ppl and can be a good friend I promise 🥺 Does anybody who's obsessed with Avatar wanna be my friend? 🥺👉🏻👈🏻

#꒰ა victória speaks ໒꒱ #victória vents ✶ #i miss having more avatar obsessed friends 😪 #avatar the way of water #avatar twow #avatar james cameron #avatar 2009

[strongheartneteyam]

call me crazy for saying this but all I wish I could have right now was a hug from neteyam :'( a tight, warm, good hug from my big alien kitty... I just know it would make me feel better

I love him so much 💔

#꒰ა victória speaks ໒꒱ #victória vents ✶ #victória will never get over neteyam sully 🥺💘

[strongheartneteyam]

I'm gonna die... (for my people who use Fahrenheit... this is really hot.)

#꒰ა victória speaks ໒꒱ #victória vents ✶ #humans are destroying Mother Earth and she's biting back

[strongheartneteyam]

I'm sick guys :(( my throat, eyes, head and whole body hurts 🥺🤕 it sucks sm

#꒰ა victória speaks ໒꒱ #victória vents ✶ #victória is sick 🥺

[strongheartneteyam]

man i wanna write so bad but i'm also having author's burnout it's not only my chronic illness that is a problem ugh i feel sad and feel like i'm not letting my characters keep living their lives cuz i'm not writing them doing their stuff/living (yes it sounds crazy but i'm not the only one who feels this way i've actually researched about it and many authors relate lol) and that breaks my heart there's this constant itch to write and i keep brainstorming ideas for my fics n writing them down (it's a part of my creative process 🤍) but i can't actually write rn aaaargh i'm f r u s t r a t e d

#꒰ა victória speaks ໒꒱ #victória vents ✶ #writer problems

[strongheartneteyam]

I'm so happy that I'm being able to write, even if it's just some short drabbles 😭 I'm still really anxious and depressed and my brain isn't at its best right now to be as creative as I can be when I'm better so I was so scared I wouldn't be able to write again or that at least it would take me ages to write again... I'm thankful things are better than I had imagined. Thank u guys for reading what I write 🥲💕

#꒰ა victória speaks ໒꒱ #victória vents ✶ #victória l♡ves her readers so much :')

[strongheartneteyam]

Guys, my life is really hard rn and I have writer's block so I can't promise when I'm gonna update and finish my fics on hiatus but I still am very much in love with the characters and the stories so, I do intend to finish them when I can. Please, hold on <3

#꒰ა victória speaks ໒꒱ #victória vents ✶ #victória l♡ves her readers so much :')

[strongheartneteyam]

guys I'm worried... did everyone stop liking me and/or my content all of a sudden (or bc of some reason idk about ???) n that's why I'm getting so little notifications and the last chapters of Realize where you belong have not been receiving as much attention as the fanfic did in the first chapters or has the Avatar fandom really gotten so small and quiet? 🥺

#꒰ა victória speaks ໒꒱ #victória vents ✶ #where is everyone

[strongheartneteyam]

I'm sick :( my throat, nose and ear are acting up

#꒰ა victória speaks ໒꒱ #victória vents ✶

[strongheartneteyam]

An update of my chaotic life/an explanation to all my moots, readers and followers who interact with me 🤍

TW: family issues

Things are real tough with my parents right now. We had a big fight, horrible one, but, after some time everybody apologized (but not my mother. it's rare that she says "sorry" for anything) and now things are more peaceful but the air is still heavy, y'know? So that's one of the main reasons why I've been MIA lately, why I haven't been answering your messages and asks, but, God, I still love you all LIKE CRAZY, so, so much (for real) and I have, like, the next 4 Chapters (or more. not sure) of Realize where you belong saved. They're almost ready, I just have to write a few more things and edit them and they will be ready to be posted! ♡ even though this one is by far the darkest, most raw fanfic I've ever written (so hard to put reader and Neteyam through so much but I PROMISE it will all make sense and be worth it in the end!), it's been such a great experience and a bit of a challenge to write this story, for so many reasons, which is wonderful. And I'm also so happy with the fact that this is my most "famous" (I don't like using this word. Gives me the ick) fanfiction so far and I DID NOT anticipate this AT ALL! It's amazing 🥲🥰 Sorry for being so inactive and taking long to answer y'all (and not being able to answer everyone 🥺), my life is really hard rn. Today my kitten is going to be spayed and she will spend the night at the clinic and me and my bf are really worried about her (she's our lil daughter 🐈‍⬛🥺) and I'll have to take care of her post surgery healing process almost all by myself for the next weeks (my bf works until late at night) so... I've got a lot on my plate rn. I really need to focus on taking care of myself, of my loved ones and on surviving and thriving through it all. It'd be lovely if you guys would leave me some nice comments in this post. Your kind words always make me feel better. Thank y'all for everything and wish y'all only the very best 🙏🏻 💖 kiss kiss 💋 💌

#꒰ა victória speaks ໒꒱ #victória vents ✶ #victória l♡ves her readers so much :') #victória's moots live in her heart <3◝(ᵔᵕᵔ)◜ #victória l♡ves her followers!! ꒰✮꒱

[strongheartneteyam]

oh God I hate being so goddamn sensitive istg you guys I will see smth that upsets me online something that triggers me and Jesus freaking Christ my heart starts beating fast, my throat tightens and then I'm like excuse me girl I know we're neurodivergent and full of anxiety in our small 5'1 body but can you pls not?????

#꒰ა victória speaks ໒꒱ #victória vents ✶ #its hard out here

[strongheartneteyam]

I want my new glasses SO BAD 😭😭😭 I miss reading more than anything

#꒰ა victória speaks ໒꒱ #victória vents ✶ #being somewhat visually impaired sucks

[strongheartneteyam]

istg I have to stop comparing myself to other creators and thinking everything I write will never compare to their wonderful works and that I'm not talented enough and that I shouldn't even insist on keep writing on the first place bc I'll never be good enough anyway (my brain has been a bitch to me lately)

I gotta realize that just bc they're good it doesn't mean I'm not good too. We're different artists and all of us can shine differently. I hate how my biggest enemy is inside my own head. I'm the first person to bring myself down, to make me feel bad for things that I should not feel bad about. I dream of becoming a pro writer one day and if I keep comparing myself to others and telling myself I don't measure up, it will most definitely not help me have the confidence I need to one day start and finish writing my own novel. I can't keep doing this to myself

sorry for venting tho I just really needed to write this down somewhere...

Any words of advice or love are very appreciated 🥺🤍

#꒰ა victória speaks ໒꒱ #victória vents ✶