#why cant i stay asleep?

[auggiedrawsturts]

Younger siblings doing younger sibling things (they were supposed to go to sleep six hours ago)

#rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rise of the tmnt #rottmnt donnie #rottmnt mikey #rottmnt leo #everyone always talks about Donnie and Leo hanging out at night bc of insomnia/hyperfixations #and I love that headcanon #BUT WHAT ABOUT MICHEAL???? #hes a teenage artist with adhd and his own private room #you cant convince me that he doesn't stay up late or pull all nighters because he gets too focused on his art #also if youre wondering why Raph isnt included #he is currently asleep in his own room like a normal person with a normal sleep schedule #the weirdo /lh #I totally drew this at a reasonable time and not in the middle of the nights

[fourteenthz]

Been thinking abt thesa/thancred and how long it took her to take her feelings seriously. Sometimes, you repress a part of your heart for so long that when it's reawaken, it feels like a dream. Or a nightmare even. And it's painful at first and just genuinely seems morally wrong for someone, so duty bounded, but then.... once he takes a step forward, it flows so easily. It's like he's giving her his hand and saying, "I'll teach you how to deal with it," and if it was spoken by any other soul in any other tone, she'd take offense. If it was anyone else but him. And when they are together at first, it just entirely feels like puppy love. And for some reason she knows that past-thesa would scoff at this and how childish it looks - how she acts like a teenager in love sometimes when they are alone - and she loves it because Thancred doesn't think that. And slowly, she isn't thinking that anymore. She's learning with him, you know.

#its 6am what am i even doing with my life #i should be asleep. i have 1 day free and instead of sleeping and stay awake all night with thoughts abt thesa/thancred #and for some reason i still can't write anything im happy with. i miss writing. #whats wrong with my word doc and why did this text post came easier than anything I've been trying the last month #anywah THEM...... #thinking about them at the beginning of their relationship so hard rn. cant stop the thoughts. #how they are so used to understand one another by looks but then when it comes to romance it changes the dynamic #how she is a lot more vocal but still so bad at conveying her feelings and truly understanding that kind of his #and shes always like 'i think you will have to tell me what is it' and how she gets ready for it to be annoying thing to say #but instead of reacting like that he goes 'once you stop distracting me I'll try' and kisses her and and and 🗣🗣 #its the person who thinks they are hard to love x person who loves them like breath etc etc...... u get me.. #its abt her slowly opening up to love and how just bc its hard doesn’t mean it's bad.... #thancred being surprised about how cheeky and talkative she is once they are comfortable in a relationship.... #and her not being surprised at all with how gentle he is. because some things change but other's are intricately theirs #and its abt learning the new things and getting used to love the old ones and just. love is so nice. im having feelings rn excuse me. #throwing up etc etc how do i sleep with my head so full of wolcred this is unfair truly. almost 7am. how. #sorry just really can't stop thinking abt how thesa I'll never forget the look in thancred's eyes when their first met and how thancred saw #a very similar one once she said ily out loud for the first time. being sane and normal and not unwell at all #kelly says #dl #thesa/thancred #wol posting #x: together to the bitter end #(just for tagging/blacklist means) #<- just noticed i drafted this out of shame YOU KNOW WHAT.............. POSTING IT TODAY SORRY #i'm having thoughts about them i can stop I miss them I miss them I miss them I miss you writing wolcred save me save me etc etc #i really wrote that text post with my whole chest and drafted it at 7am. 🫵 shame on you prev kelly 🫵 #posted today's vierapril with them well get this too. being annoying and making it everybody's problem today. have at it.

[the-yearning-astronaut]

.

#that feeling when you have the overwhelming urge to cry #but you're staying at a friend's house #and her and her kid and her husband are all asleep #and you know you'll be up for another hour at least because fuckin insomnia doesn't give a shit how physically exhausted you are #and ofc its the Bad Hours so my brain is doing gremlin things #like making me feel self conscious and awkward and out of place #i KNOW im not! i know my friends love me!!! #but being amongst them and their families.... idk it just highlights how very very different my own life is #and i know thats not a problem either! #but like. they can relate to each other in ways I never will #the three of them are married and have kids and have their own homes #and it's just. idk. i feel so outta place. like a mismatched puzzle piece. and i hate that i feel like that but i do. #Fuck im gonna start crying & i really don't wanna do that again so im gonna go finish Artificial Condition (again) & try some crocheting #im so tired and my head still feels like shit from this afternoon #fml why cant i just be happy and enjoy myself #tbd #☉ #fox thoughts #(and you three idk how often you're on tumblr anymore but if you happen across this-- #IT'S NOT YOU. it's got nothing to do with anything youve said or done. you're all lovely and perfect -- my brain's just bad)

[robotpussy]

woke up from my sleep angry because I take too long to do anything like I'm so fucking annoyed rn I genuinely cannot comprehend how ppl have full time jobs and go to school and also fully indulge in their hobbies and get them done in timely manners because if I'm doing anything I have to either finish it in a day or it will take a year to complete it

#anyways im not working on that hobie thing anymore its stressing me out that its taking me a month to make a fucking collage 😭😭 #u thought i could have real progress yesterday but after 3 hrs of working on it i got tired and wanted to sleep #*i thought #also the reason why i barely ever make videos im either too tired or it will take me 5 months to edit because #i can't focus on more than 1 thing at a time. if im editing something don't fucking ask me to go anywhere i need yo finish this shit #or it will never be done #been trying to edit my Beyonce and spiderverse vlogs and its just taking too long i just abandoned them #and then like. school. #that fucking university has done nothing but waste my time. wasting my time travelling for 6 hrs so by the time i get home #i cant even do anything but eat and fall asleep because if i stay up to work on what i want to do i will basically get no sleep #cant even indulge in my hobbies without wanting to kill myself because even those stress me out OH MY GOD

[netscapenavigaytor]

5am bloging

#i stillhave a migraine i just woke up and cant get back to sleep #beause i was asleep almost all day.......... i am tired of sleeping lol #error 0 #anyway im probaply goig to just reblog stuff in my lieks #also irrelevant gohan gif is from gifcities. i already forgot why i put it on this post but he can stay anyway

[arthur-r]

falling asleep worked i did it for three hours. now what i’m still tired i just also wasted the day and looked stupid to my roommate….

#like im glad i slept but also. same problems as before #although my french teacher emailed me back said i should go to office hours. which is a proper response to my email #wikipedia guy texted me back with details like an hour after i texted but also like two or three hours ago #gonna settle the score by bringing a $20 bill tomorrow then i won’t feel so weird and guilty #but no i feel so fucking stupid and gross for like. i was crying so close to my roommate so i had to fall asleep #or else i’d be standing up with tears in my eyes next to my roommate which is worse #but i just. i dont know. like he thinks i’m just lazy. i’m always asleep i never tell him why #i dont know. good morning i hope everyone is doing well #there are two people i usually get dinner with and one is out of town and the other i think his parents are here and also things are weird #translation things aren’t weird i’m just weird and feel guilty for being such a weird person #anyway i just. college?? what am i doing here???? #i talked to my mom this morning she says that she felt the same way during college and that she should have dropped out way earlier #which. not helpful?? what do i do after i drop out?? i am someone who can’t hold a normal part time job and my only HOPE is ending up being #i mean anything really just something that requires a lot of prior experience!! #and the college is paying me really good to go to school but only if i stay full time #so i cant just lower my course load because that will actually make everything worse instead of better #idk. going to french teachers office hours tomorrow and will figure out time for linguistics teacher too and will get my LIS grade back up #(that one is just simple that one is i missed two discussion posts but there are ten more to come and also tests and stuff. i’ll be ok) #idk. and i still want to go to my LIS teachers office hours and ask how he became professor of rare books print culture and information bias #that is a good set of things to be a scholar for. and he’s curating collections at the same time as being my teacher #so idk. professors don’t seem as stupid and uppity as they used to. and i think i want to do that someday #plus with the salary jump from librarian i can feasibly become a major donor to local libraries to keep that influence around shdhdf #(although. if i get paid by the school (!!) to get a phd in print culture who says i don’t become a fancy librarian with that??) #i dont know. this is so stupid because i get so excited about the prospects and then i go back to the present and i’m flunking out of school #my grades haven’t been this bad since the height of COVID i thought something about me had gotten better but apparently not #like literally who went and made me traumatized?? why did you have to do that?? now i can’t be a normal person?? shut up!!!! #idk. just feel like if i weren’t having panic attacks about the fact that people are safe and kind here (and therefore must be hiding their #true intentions and taking advantage of me) then maybe i would have remembered to take my french test #idk. i’m tired and want to go home. sorry for venting all day i hope everyone is doing okay #vent cw

[miss--river]

i just wanted to go to bed at a reasonable time but here i am waking up at 1am 😑

#why cant i ever stay asleep!?

[reaperkaneki]

trying not to think about the fact that our rent + utilities + internet is about as much as i make in a month. sometimes more sometimes less depending on utilities. that is not including gas and groceries. i go through a full tank in 2/3rds of a week. gas is like 5/gal. augh. fucking hate it here,

#plus i just paid for my bfs wisdom teeth removal out of pocket bc his job fucked him and he doesnt have insurance #and that was… several thousand. why is existence painful #have had to get new brake pads for my car for a while now but just cant find the time+energy+money for it #and my windshield is just gonna have to stay cracked for the foreseeable future bc as it is it doesnt obscure my vision #🙃🙃🙃 #contemplating splurging on antibiotics for this uti that is the reason i am awake and not asleep rn #symptoms are so mild that it feels like a waste to spend time and money and horrible anxiety points on obtaining medicine for it #but its also been like. almost a week now. we’ll see

[starredforlife]

in a cat conundrum

#my cat jackie needs to be fed in 20 minutes but she has to stay outside of the room #bc inside she jumps all over my desk and then tries to eat paper (its her form of protest) #cant keep her outside bc roommates cat fights with her/she scratches at the door relentlessly #i have my earphones in and cant really hear it well #and im trying to work #my roommate is asleep in here #cant leave the door open bc the first roommate's cat wants to masturbate on my room-roommate's PILLOW while hes SLEEPING #shaking stewie by the shoulders WHY CANT U JUST BE NORMAL. #star's thoughts #dl

[kimmkitsuragi]

why is every game in wholesome direct trying to recreate the undertale soundtrack??? u will never be toby fox

#why did i even watch wholesome direct dont ask #I'm desperate trying not to fall asleep doing my project #I wonder when i will give up and go to bed tonight #it cant be before 4am.... pls stay strong until 4am we need this #🗒 #technically i shall not sleep at all but welp #g

[bibleofficial]

ok not smoking cigarettes is not that bad i’ll be honest like i was thinking this was going to be WAY worse

#stream #but i still use like 2-3 patches / day (bc they fall off when i’m asleep bc im like a toaster oven & a pig bc i SWEAT) #& also several pieces of gum but no cigarettes no vape since like THURSDAY OR WHENEVER THE HELL #it’s nicotine gum obviosuly 😭😭😭 #but i mean #having to literally #go outside & find somewhere to sit to smoke sounds really fucking horrible to do rn like it’s 90° it’s hot i’m dying no thank U !!!!!!! #stay inside in the FANS in the AC !!! #bro i cant wait until i can walk again #it’s been 2 days #i’m angry #like today is sooooo beautiful out #i could be on a bike ride rn #but i’m not #i mean ALSKALKSLAKSLA i haven’t even looked at my bike i think my chains a bit fucked too or the alternator or whatever #like u know switch speeds on the bike thing #wait why is that fucked up i went down on my left & it’s on the right #u know what idk maybe that piece IS on the left

[maddiescars]

God FUCKING dammit I give up.

#i cant stay long i tell him. i have school tomorrow i tell him. okay he says. just come over we'll have fun he says #i go over and he starts acting all melodramatic and refuses to tell me whats wrong until i ask him four fucking times #talks at me yet again about how im failing him as a girlfriend #damn dude just fucking break up with me already. #he only keeps me because im his shrink #he calls and i come running but heaven forbid i tell him how slur reclamation works when he ASKS ME ABOUT IT!!!!!!!!! #i cant fucking win. he needs to leave. he needs to break up with me because ill never be who he wants me to be #and im not gonna change to be who he wants because then ill become suicidal #dude is not stupid but damn man how the fuck am i supposed to do anything at all when every six weeks you drill me for something #something central to myself that i don't even do on purpose #i already know im not gonna marry this dude I don't know why i stick around #hes hot as hell and nice as all get out but dude isn't funny and makes me listen to music i hate #he makes me waste my time with him nonstop i was supposed to be asleep by now every time i make something cool #he hounds me until i make it for him too i cant even run and hide because he'll hunt me down and get all pissy #that im not mouthfucking him as much this week and is something wrong??????? communication is key honey u have to TELL me well shit man #how the fuck dp you expect me to tell you when you're the problem?

[macjaket]

.

#guess this is my venting hours now #like. okay. i get it. u dont ussually share a room. but we are sharing it now. so u cant just exist like the room is just yours #like. keep the window open cuz if u close it when i come in the room smells like shit #like. if u know i need my tine alone and i can only play music loud with the speaker in the room #dont be an aswhole and hog the room all day #like i know u leave it sometimes. but why is it that u are there all day but only leave it at like 10pm #a time when i would be and ashole for playing music with the speaker peiple are already asleep #and when im in the room u dont care and just go in like i havent said multiole times thst i need it for myself sometime #and that i cant exist in the room if ur also there. like u know it is my safeplace in the house and still u tske it from me #and then u go back i to the room at like 1 am and stsy there on ur phone #i cant fukin sleep if i know ur awake inside the room. and ive told him many times #but the piece of shit still stays in the room just on his phone till like 2 am. and everyday he tskes longer to go to skeep #so my sleep is even more fucked that usual cuz i gotta stay out of the room cuz i cant be in there untim he is asleep #also. its not a ‘he will get mad if i go in’ no. its a ‘my brain doesnt let me exist in the room if someone else is there’

[jewishdainix]

ytou know this really reminds me of th time me and my friends did karaoke and i sat tjhrough all their bad songs but when my turn came and i put a warrior cats song they didnt site with me and our cool karaoke moment fell apart like bro i sat thorough yours but when my intrest comes it's too cringey for you i didnt complain because i liked being togather even though i didnt enjoy your intrest why canrt you respect mine

#by 'this' im refering to anne and sasha falling asleep at the sleepover when #marcy shpowed them tjat movie #likw #ouch #thAt is relatable #mina watches amphibia #LIKE IDK WHY CANT THEY HAVE SAT WITH ME OR AT LEAST PRETENDED #BUT THEY HQAD TO GO TO THE OTHWER ROOM THEY JSUST DIDNT CARE #and it's not that mine was something only i liked and theirs was something we all liked #i didnt like their's but i stayed because they were #my friends and we had fun why couldnt they do that for me #vent #honestly marcy's the most relatble character there for me because of those type of things

[cityprix-moved]

lmfao

#im gonna stay up for the race. MAYBE practice 1 but i doubt i wont fall asleep #this is why i cant have 3 american races 😓sorry americans #f1 #miami gp #p

[onewingeddragonqueen]

spider in my house (on wall)

spider in my house (big)

spider in my house (hit it with broom)

spider in my house (fell)

spider in my house (not dead)

spider in my house (on cup)

spider in my house (threw cup outside)

spider in my house (was actually not in cup)

spider in my house (can’t find it)

#going insane going insane going insane #i have a severe phobia of bugs #this is day 2 btw #on day one i froze when i saw it and it disappeared and i stayed up all night looking (didnt find it) fell asleep from exhaustion #saw it while watching stranger things (why vecna WHY) #still haven’t found it. maybe it curled up and died but i aint that lucky #cant relax pls help