Tumgik
uncouth-peasant · 2 months
Text
The cookie dough fandom is dying reblog if you like it wet and raw
48K notes · View notes
uncouth-peasant · 2 months
Text
This is so special to me.
I’m so emotional about dinosaur stuffed animals,,, there are these creatures, extinct long before any of us were alive, but we found their bones and their eggs and their footprints. And we made drawings and models of what they could’ve looked like. And we made them into stuffed animals so we could hold them. We made them soft so we could love them. I’m sobbing
104K notes · View notes
uncouth-peasant · 2 months
Note
Hi, sorry but could you recommend any of your favourite Peter Parker fics please?
For sure !!! *cracks open ao3 bookmarks*
Thirty Hours by polaroid15 - Peter doesn't take any breaks during a lengthy fight with the Avengers. The mind-melting fever that follows really should have been expected.
Hurt Peter Parker, my favourite tag <3 I love when Spider-Man is a badass and also lacks self-preservation. He's so cool fighting alongside the Avengers and we get some sweet hurt/comfort irondad!
Fitting In (Tiny Spaces) by aloneintherain - Peter's trapped beneath a collapsed building during a mission, hurt and unable to move. Luckily, his comm still works. Unluckily, the Avengers don’t realise how bad of a state Peter is in, and Peter isn’t inclined to tell them.
This fic is an icon in the fandom and for GOOD REASON. I just can not get enough of Peter Parker hiding his injuries. More heavy whump and angst!
All good things come in threes by Bergen - Peter has three secret identities: Spider-Man, the superhero who swings around the city to save people. Parker Benjamin, who gives Tony Stark unsolicited advice on his research. And NightMonkey, the Instagrammer who keeps uploading increasingly popular but embarrassing drawings of Iron Man.
And he can juggle them all just fine, thankyouverymuch.
Okay here is the fluff!!! Peter is a genius, a menace, and a sweetheart. Tony Stark runs into him (again and again) and can't help but have a soft spot for him every time. Funny and cute and an all 'round good time!
Held Together by Spiderwebs by TunaFishChris - Steve is not coping well in the twenty-first century. At all. Three months after the Chitauri invasion, he decides he's had enough.
But just as he's about to end it all, he runs into the new hero in town.
This one focuses a lot on Steve but I really like him and Peter's relationship in it, and I think this is great Peter Parker characterization. TW for discussions of depression and suicide, it gets a bit dark!
5 Times Spider-Man Saved an Avenger's Ass (and 1 Time They Saved Him) by TunaFishChris - this fic showcases how strong and capable Peter is, he's definitely a BAMF. I really like this genre where the Avengers know Spider-Man but not Peter Parker, makes Peter feel more independent and mature like in the comics.
Five Time Faculty Members Had to Call Peter's Emergency Contact + One Time He Shows Up Anyway, Five Times Tony Stark's Fabled Intern Just Showed Up + One Time He Was Invited, and Five Times Strangers Talked About Peter and Tony + One time Someone They Know Did by kingdomfaraway - I am just gonna recommend this entire series. Super fluffy, extreme irondad and spiderson. They're just adorable from an outside perspective and I love when Peter gets to just be Tony's intern and a teenager for a while :)
research and disaster by blueh - “So, uh, Mr. Stark definitely knows Roomba-Kid,” Becket says and discreetly tilts his head in the direction of the pair.
“Oh my god,” Jess says. She almost sounds gleeful. “Oh my god, he’s not just some random kid. He’s Mr. Stark’s kid.”
or: the interns at Stark Industries have some questions about Peter Parker. The answers aren’t quite what they expect.
I just love intern Peter mk? Let him be a kid genius and have fun!!! Fluffy and humorous, again with the irondad.
Captain, Oh My- Not My Captain! by uncouth_peasant - Peter swallowed hard before firing a web to swing into the fray. “Cap’s going after civilians. I’m out of time.”
Bruised and bloody men <3. Just Peter being a badass and getting beat to a pulp. Cool fighting, lots of Peter whump, and of course the Avengers being protective.
Good publicity by Bergen - Between Peter Parker barely speaking, and Spider-Man being the ultimate chatterbox, how was Tony ever supposed to figure out that they were one and the same person?
Tony Stark is secretly a softie for cute kids, especially when they're a genius and have a sense of humour to rival his own. Peter is a foster kid who ends up finding a home with Pepper and Tony, very sweet.
The Third Option by Uncertainty_Principle - When Ben is murdered Peter goes into foster care. It takes just a tiny taste of superpowers for Peter to decide he doesn’t want to put up with his horrible foster father anymore—the streets are infinitely more appealing. All he wants is to be Spider-Man anyway.
So he leaves, simple.
Simple, that is, until Iron Man needs Spider-Man’s help.
Heavy TW for this one, mind the tags. This is a popular fic and for good reason. A very mature and realistic portrayal of the foster care system and homelessness. The Peter angst is really great and I could barely put it down, that boy needs a hug so bad.
Now here's some hydra!Peter fics cuz they're my jam:
Peter is a precious chickpea by Bergen - They attack the HYDRA safe house shortly before sunrise.
The only people defending said safe house are Peter and Leo, and Leo slams his cell door open and starts spitting out orders, but then promptly gets clobbered over the head and keels sideways.
So that just leaves Peter. And he’s not even going to try to fight a whole team of Avengers. He looks up at Iron Man filling the doorway. “I surrender.”
He’s never been captured before and he’s not sure what to do. Escape, probably.
This entire series is PERFECT. I just love how adorable Peter is, and all the relationships Peter forms with the Avengers absolutely melt my heart. Peter's characterization in this is really unique and I wish there was more. The Bucky and Peter friendship is everythingggg. I love hydra!peter and bucky fics.
Indoctrination by phoenixon - The Avengers thought they were on a typical assignment: Infiltrate the Hydra base and find the weapon. What they didn't expect was the small boy raised by Hydra that they found instead. And they definitely didn't expect him to stay at Avengers Tower or how he somehow wormed his way into their lives. As for Peter, he just wants to be good and obey what the Hydra men told him so he doesn't get in trouble.
I just really love hydra Peter changing into a sweet and intelligent boy once he's rescued and safe, and how all the Avengers take up such heart-warming parental roles around him.
out there, living in the sun by Hailfire_73 - The Avengers rescue Peter from a Hydra base ran by his father, Richard Parker, except Peter doesn't really see it as a rescue, and has trouble settling into a new life away from Hydra and his father at the Avengers compound. OR - Peter learns how to be an actual teenager, live life, and put his abusive past behind him, and Tony learns how to be a father.
Hydra Peter but he's most definitely a traumatized and moody teenager. I really enjoyed Peter's character arc and the exploration of his trauma. It felt more realistic the way his journey isn't just a straight or clear path. He's more mature in this one and it was a really compelling read, balancing the angst with some humour and fluff. Loved the ending.
Tinker, Tailor, Spider by Bergen - Tony is roped into a mission to transport a teenager to safety. But when things go south, it soon becomes more and more puzzling who the teenager is and what ‘safety’ means for him.
I really enjoy that the author doesn't water Peter being hydra down. Yes he is a highly skilled assassin and a badass who's trauma pervades his every thought and decision. Made me fall in love with the Tony, Pepper, Morgan and Peter as a family dynamic. Super domestic while still highlighting Peter's troubled past.
180 notes · View notes
uncouth-peasant · 3 months
Text
Kind of silly, random lesson from today:
It’s okay to have a bag that you just put stuff in. It’s ok to have a guilty pleasure messy bag. Especially when you’re a clarinet student in college and your professor hands your friend two VERY EXPENSIVE clarinet mouthpieces and says that he doesn’t have a way to store them.
And that’s why it’s ok to have a messy everything bag. Because that’s when you remember that you just got a new mouthpiece, and the box is big enough to hold two, and there were even little foam cubes on either end of the box to support the mouthpiece. So you save the day and whip out your little box and boom.
So it’s ok. Collect well, my little magpies. Use your powers for good.
0 notes
uncouth-peasant · 3 months
Text
My best friend and I will be roommates next year and they have begun to refer to themselves as Mom’s Weird New Boyfriend in every matter regarding my cat and their need to spoil her so.
"roommate's cat" is the ideal pet. This creature is not my responsibility in any way and I spend zero dollars of my income keeping her alive and she lives in my house and is obsessed with sitting on my lap. Perfect arrangement
29K notes · View notes
uncouth-peasant · 3 months
Text
Tumblr media
131K notes · View notes
uncouth-peasant · 3 months
Text
A customer contacted our team with questions, and then finished their email with: "I am daunted by the complexities and unknowns." I haven't been able to stop thinking about it since.
66K notes · View notes
uncouth-peasant · 3 months
Text
Character A: you ungrateful little SHIT—
Character B: who are you, my father???
A:
B:
0 notes
uncouth-peasant · 4 months
Text
you can click on this button once daily to help palestine and support other causes in the middle east for free. it takes literally 5 seconds and could help save lives so please take the time to click and share this link.
237K notes · View notes
uncouth-peasant · 4 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Does anybody remember Dragon Tales? 🥺
34K notes · View notes
uncouth-peasant · 4 months
Text
Real
my feet hurt
5 notes · View notes
uncouth-peasant · 4 months
Text
*kicks my feet playfully whilst lying on my front and lining up my sniper rifle*
31K notes · View notes
uncouth-peasant · 4 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Buy the Massachusetts Ape Drops to give yourself what experts are calling “turbo monkey liver failure.”
23K notes · View notes
uncouth-peasant · 4 months
Text
Tumblr media
308 notes · View notes
uncouth-peasant · 4 months
Text
The best friendships are the ones that can stop mid bickering to compliment each other’s hair or clothing on the occasion
“This? *points to a sheet of music titled Riff Raff* This is you.”
“This is exactly why you’re two chairs below me.”
“I’m GLAD to be far away from YOU— also your sweater is cute”
0 notes
uncouth-peasant · 4 months
Text
Turn on the sound. Cowards.
Do not turn on the sound
50K notes · View notes
uncouth-peasant · 4 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Everyone reblog this IMMEDIATELY
11K notes · View notes