undyinghope

[undyinghope]

" yes. okay. picturing." blue eyes squint while her imagination activates , her bottom lip pulls between her teeth while she does as she's told and looks at what it would be like with maksim at the helm of the volki for arguments sake and listens carefully as she always does when mikhail is speaking. of course asli is an intelligent listener for anyone who was willing to have a conversation with her. but when it comes to mikhail , he always seemed to be teaching her something about the world around them ; thus , she appreciates the time she has with mikhail , knowing how hard he’s worked up until this point and how very little personal time he has. back to the task at hand , picturing maksim as leader wasn't difficult , and asli wasn't one for internal politics or hierachy , but she is loyal.“ so , sort of like you and svetlana. ” asli pins on as a way to make a connection that makes sense to her. asli has never doubted mikhail for one second , though , if mikhail didn't have svetlana things might look a little different. the way they interacted with one another , the way they leaned on each other. " anyhow , there isn't much use in being lev's partner when i'm already busy. "

“ it may just be the riskiest job you ever take , do you think you could handle it? ” asli plays along , her voice becoming unusually matter of fact and her brow rise for playful effect. “ you don't strike fear in hearts now , mikhail. at least not mine. ” how could she fear someone who has done nothing but looked out for her since becoming part of crew the crew? “ you say that like it’s a bad thing. who cares if you’re round and lazy , isn't that the whole point of retirement? ” asli grins widely, picturing mikhail in another life, perhaps after all of this is over. a little older , a little rounder , and a little lazier. 

it's a pretty thought , mikhail says. it's not the first time he’s say things along these lines ─ like he’s willing himself to believe , he’s trying to believe. believe in faith , in hope , in dreams , in plans and ambition ─ whatever you want to call it. darkness has touched every soul. life changing , world altering situations. unconditional hope , a steadfast guide , whispers ' hold one , embrace ,' she takes it as an order , her tone if soft , yet her answer is definite. “ i will. i swear. ” and now, just like that , asli doesn’t hold onto hope just for herself , but tenaciously , she holds onto hope for mikhail. for the rest of the volki. for her parents.

speaking of her parents , asli hums with warmth and a smile at the mention of her father. “ it was hard. those first couple of years without her. ” without ece. “ it still can be , i suppose. ” asli was young and unfortunately remembers everything vividly about the day her mother was taken away. after that , life seemed rough around the edges without her , the peace and wisdom that she carried with her was gone. the absence of ece was filled with grief that felt like the ocean , the waves are calm some days and other days she cannot swim. once she came out of her own period of grief and was able to witness her father , hurt and broken , she made a promise that she would be by his side fiercely. ece made people feel like they could see the stars even when they are feeling dark and isolated. “ he used to say that half of his heart was missing. he doesn’t mention it at all anymore , but i know he still feels that way. how could he feel any other way? you can tell from his eyes , as if it’s become part of him , step by step , breath for breath. ”  it makes her sad. she looks toward mikhail , into his dark eyes that look hauntingly familiar to kerem's ...

" ooh. those are good scents. i can't believe i didn't say peppermint. " asli mentions to mikhail with an approving nod. " i wonder what we're going to see , " she watches as lev messily prepares an assortment of teats , apparently each infused with its own ' enchantment '. excitedly nudging mikhail , asli rocks onto the balls of her feet with anticipation. with shaking hands , lev hands over the first pastry to asli and she takes it with care into the palms of her hands and without hesitation she bites into the soft cream puff ... white bells fill the meadows under a sun that beckons them to grow strong and beautiful. soft guitar music , the aroma a new loaf rising in the hot oven. asli gives a delighted laugh. overwhelmed by memories that remind her of home , but delighted nonetheless with powdered sugar at the corner of her lips. " you've really outdone yourself , lev ! go on , mikhail. stuff your face ! "

“How about this. Picture Ig – actually, Maksim deciding to be the leader of the Volki.” He is swift to alter his words with minute details, or rather names. He wasn’t so high up in the chain as to not be aware of the certain level of blind faith she had in the boy, yes boy, who had enraptured her attention. Too much attention, if you were to ask him. Or likely her father if it were to be brought up to him. But it doesn’t get brought up; maybe as more of a favor to himself as to not incur a father’s wrath over who kept her company. He’ll sweep it under a rug, for now, as well as use other examples of those less likely to have her full-hearted support. Though, there will likely never be one whom she doesn’t support somehow. He continues, regardless. “Now, at first, it might be fine. But eventually, over time, too much fire and not enough composure just gets everyone burned.” Plans probably wouldn’t get past the preliminary stages if Maksim was in charge. If he were being honest. “Which, in a rather roundabout way, is to say that my point is that people can benefit from help. Even if they don’t say, or show, it. Decades of having this shop open can be easier with a partner.” 

The glimmer of content wavers at her surety. At how easily, and so plainly, she can look at him and say such a bold statement. He doesn’t remember the last time he has spoken so assuredly about the future. Maybe it was before his hands had become so stained. And maybe it was often, without a sliver of doubt clenching his heart in a tight fist. And now – well, now the future is anything but bright. It is bleak, mostly, and riddled with pain. But he wouldn’t say that. Not to her. His smile is grim then. But it is a smile, nonetheless. “I’m sure your right.” He isn’t. Not in the slightest. But there isn’t an ounce of bitterness in his voice to betray him as he pivots to her next thought; never lingering in his sorrow in preference of focusing on others. 

“Taste tester? Now that seems like a risky job.” A joke. Or the closest he’ll get to one. Being a taste tester would, without question, be the safest job he has committed to. Or, at the very least, one that the only real harm might be an occasional burnt tongue or loosening of his belt. “A job like that might make me rounder or lazier. I doubt I’d cause much fear in someone’s heart then. And I might not have the best taste.” He has never been overly picky when it came to food. Often it has been a ‘take what you can get’ kind of life for him. Still, he knows he’d be her taste tester without complaint if she ever did ask. With a smile that reaches his eyes. 

His features do soften then at her hopes. His smile is less dour, less forced, as his shoulders droop from a less rigid stance. “It’s a pretty thought.” A thought he was desperate to make true, and a promise he was desperate to keep. If only for the sake that she deserved it. Her father and her both did. “Don’t ever lose it. Hold onto it until it’s a reality.” And surprisingly there isn’t an ounce of sorrow tinging his voice. His grief doesn’t follow him like a shadow despite knowing what her loss felt like. Because her loss had a crumb of hope whereas his was nothing but a distant memory. Growing fainter. “I wish I could tell you the pain goes away.” And maybe he wished it more for himself. “But it doesn’t. We only ever find ways to cope. Though, I have to say, your father handles it better than most.” Loss could cripple. It could tear beautiful lives to shreds. It was a festering wound that rots. But, the Yildiz family never seemed to wither. Especially not her. Not as he has. “It will be the warmest reunion, I’m sure.” He says as he allows himself to be pulled with surprising strength towards the front counter at her insistence.

And he quickly discovers how much he has to bite his own tongue. The man is eccentric, to say the least. He is a pure burst of energy and soon it is easy to recognize why Asli is somewhat attached to him while everything was overembellished and a tad quirky for his tastes. But he keeps his thoughts to himself, and maybe slightly leans backwards from the man who flirts easily with Mikhail’s personal space. He doesn’t fret on that long, however, when a question is pointed directly to him and he stumbles, visibly, over it. There were a lot of scents that drew to mind. Some more painful than others. Scents he would never return to just as they would never return to him. So, he wouldn’t go there. Those weren’t memories he wanted to relive. Not now. “ Let’s go with peppermint, rosemary, and pine instead.” Scents that were newer to him, but familiar. Scents he experiences in his everyday life now with the Volki; the peppermint of svetlana’s skin, rosemary the smell of his office gifted through katya, and pine a frequent smell from the fighting pits where he is often found with the rest of them. He doubted these scents would offer a memory he’d want to see, past or future, but it couldn’t hurt like other scents might.

#˚✧ INTERACTIONS. #˚✧ INTERACTIONS: MIKHAIL.

[undyinghope]

Richard Bosman (American, b. 1944), Night Sky, 1990. Etching, 44 x 30 in.

#˚✧ AESTHETICS. #˚✧ LIKES.

[undyinghope]

you’ll be okay *puts flowers in your hair*

#˚✧ ABOUT. #˚✧ QUEUE.

[undyinghope]

while varyis' takes from the basket , asli realizes that it's difficult to feel lonely when she's sharing. life is can be filled with bitter and sharp things ; but then you remember that the bread is warm and fluffy , when you remember the birds will always wake you up and despite everything , the sun will always come up. when you take a look around there is everything that you need. shelter , food , a caring hand , a friend you can speak about your day with , without holding anything back because the trust is there. sharing emits all of this comfort. " thank you , varyis , " the healer beams , " enjoy! " asli patiently awaits an answer. her elbow is placed on the counter while her chin is being held in the palm of her hand. she smiles softly as varyis explains themselves and she silently appreciates that their willing to share with her. " much like you , excited and nervous. i'm excited to see the world outside of mine. " asli didn't have time to think about what was going on outside of her little farm and taking care of her father. she also wasn't the type of person to go looking for adventure on her own on a random whim. " having the chance to see new landscapes and meet new people is , well , it feels like i'm about to be opened to a different world. " the change in her tone is clear ; it's bright with anticipation , waiting what journey lays out before her.

varyis' eyes light up when they are presented with the basket of buns, the smell of spice sweetening the air and making their mouth water, ❛  these look amazing ❜ fingers immediately reach to take the nearest, tearing a piece off and taking a bite, letting out a sound of appreciation the moment the taste hits their tongue, ❛   you've outdone yourself, asli. ❜

they continue breaking off pieces of the bun as asli rounds the bar and takes a seat next to them, taking in the question posed as they finish their mouthful before replying, ❛ it feels like something inevitable. i've waited six years and now it's finally happening. ❜ a beat, a breath as their gaze wanders to the bottles of liquor stacked on the shelves opposite before returning to asli, ❛  so i guess i'm excited. nervous. eager to get going. all of the above. ❜ a soft smile, varyis gestures towards the other with the last of their food, ❛  what about you ? how are you feeling ? ❜

#˚✧ INTERACTIONS. #˚✧ INTERACTIONS: VARYIS. #these two are way too cute jdhfkjshf #also WELCOME BACK #soooooo happy to have you back!!!! <3

[undyinghope]

the fire came to light up the night , to warm the air that was more accustomed to the winter chill. it lit each face and asli finds comfort in the heat going to her core. sparks the spit out from the fire look like a dance of fireflies , the fire of embers gives energy that the healer embraces. asli firmly believed that spending time with each other , as a group or one on one , was important. a bonded group means a solid group. though , many of the members don’t speak freely or much at all about their pasts or even themselves. she tries and tries again to chip away the walls some of the members have placed around themselves. it's not unusual she’s met with a colourful choice of snippy words , a dismissive wave of the hand or a silent glare. that didn’t stop her though , never. how could she not want to understand them , even just an ounce more?  

asli grins at the raven ─ haired grisha and laughs lightly when she tells she would rather be somewhere but admits isn't a terrible situation. “ that’s the spirit! if it's any consolation , you're doing a fantastic job at toughing this out. ” her smile broadens before starting to shuffle her feet beneath her as she sits back on her ankles and leans against the log katya has perched herself on , now completely engrossed with her conversation with other. " in that case , where would you rather be , if not here? " with her curiosity comes the tilt of her head to one side , doe eyes blinking with nothing but the intent of connecting.

when the question is turned on her , asli doesn't hesitate to answer with a confident, " yes , i am. " this was the time for the crew to come together , where they could at least pretend to be normal for the next few hours. for so long it has only been her father and her. of course she has friends in svel , but this all felt very different from what she's used to. this group of eclectic , passionate people from all walks ; every time she looks at this group , asli glimpses into the resilience and grit and determination ─ and asli loves every bit of it. " it's nice to catch up , to see what the others did with their free time or maybe what they brought back with them. " her eyes turn back toward the night sky. in the back of her mind , asli is wondering what her father is doing , how he's handling being alone. he's most likely doing something similar to what asli is doing now. sitting in front of a fire , comfortable and warm and soaking in the quiet peace of night.

" so ," the healer begins slowly , as if preparing katya that another question was coming. " ─ what did you do before you came back for the bonfire? "

Whilst most of the Volki had backgrounds shrouded in mystery and chose to keep most of it concealed, Asli differed from them. Katya knew most of Asli's history, having been curious to discover it for herself when it was announced that she would be joining them. She was one of the unique ones who had somehow found her way to the Volki, even though she most evidently wasn't suited for the lifestyle. And whilst Katya was grateful that they now had a healer within their midst, she wasn't entirely convinced that Asli wouldn't be one of the delicate parts of their system, one who would inevitably lead to their downfall. But as her gaze roamed over the other who seemed to settle herself in for a conversation with herself, she chose to keep these thoughts to herself as she brought her legs to fold beneath her chin, her arms wrapping around her knees. A sardonic chuckle escaped her lips at Asli's promise to keep her presence brief; Katya knew that the other might have intended this to be true. Still, inevitably, she was sure this might be much longer than she had schemed — especially since the other thrived on conversation. Katya had certainly noticed this since Asli joined the Volki.

"I'm sure," Katya replied eventually after a short pause, letting Asli continue the conversation as she surveyed their surroundings, gazing at the others who seemed to break into small groups and others who seemed to roam on their lonesome, similar to her. Raising an eyebrow at Asli's comments, knowing that the other was rather genuine in sharing her thoughts, Katya wondered if she, too, also found it "nice" to see everyone together. Sure, it was advantageous that they were finally gathered simultaneously so they could plan for their next moves. Still, she could surely think of better ways to have spent her evening, and she most definitely would have avoided participating in this bonfire if she had the opportunity to do so. Nevertheless, here she was — and thus, at least she wouldn't have to hear the commentary from Mikhail about her missing yet another session. A slight smirk reappeared on her lips at Asli's continued remarks; Katya chose to reply, "There are places I'd rather be. But it's not as bad as it could be." Half a falsehood, but the other didn't have to know that exactly. "And you — are you enjoying yourself, hm?"

#˚✧ INTERACTIONS. #˚✧ INTERACTIONS: KATYA.

[undyinghope]

AYÇA AYŞIN TURAN via INSTAGRAM

#THAT'S MY GIRL ! #THAT'S ASLI ! #˚✧ VISAGE.

[undyinghope]

at the inn , asli can be found tucked away in a dark corner ; her nose in a book and a journal with a feathered pen sits on top of the table she occupies. she doesn't notice the presence of another volki until they speak and it causes asli to jolt her eyes away from the worn pages and toward the looming figure who had approached. “ sofiya , ” she breathes the others name in surprise and concern. straightening up quickly and blinking up at the smuggler.

in her surprise , it takes a moment for sofiya’s words to sink in. “ oh ─ okay. yes , of course. ” a ' please ' would have been nice , though in this current crisis and the simple fact that this is sofiya she's dealing with asli can , indeed , let it go. blue eyes sweep around the dimly lit inn , always cautious about showing her abilities out in the open. luckily enough for the two it was empty. “ sit , please , ” she instructs softly while shuffling out of her own spot and ushering sofiya to take the open chair in order to be more comfortable and take the weight and stress off of the wound. despite being curious , asli doesn’t ask how sofiya acquired such an injury.

what she does do is begin to quickly roll sofiya’s pant leg up ; she needs to be able to see if the injury is big and it helps to see if the wound is deep. the sight is gruesome but not the worst , thank the stars. with a sudden force of concentration , energy and the swift movement of fingers still learning. a little jagged , seemingly even a little unconfident they are still eager to ease the pain for her fellow volki.  

with a surge , the fractured bone comes together , the skin mends and stitches together in a few short breathes. “ better? ” a question asli never fails to ask after healing someone. if they're uncomfortable in anyway , she needed to know. " nothing feels as if it's about to rupture , does it? " asli doesn't know what possess her to feel as if she needed to try and jest with sofiya maryin ; the presences of who fills her with unease.

there's a moment that is eclipsed with silence. when asli is finished healing and she begins to retract warm hands from the once torn skin. “ ... i’ll get you a damp cloth to wipe the soot off your face. ” not sure if the smuggler is aware of the bit of dirt on her face , the healer gestures to her own features and in a bout of nerves , then scampers away.

who: @undyinghope where: the bonfire when: 5th of october, 5:50 am

Here is a simple truth: Sofiya Maryin doesn't ask for help, even when getting down the stairs is killing her. The dull ache had spiraled, grown from the marrow of her knee into a sharp, stabbing pain. She should swallow it, digest it until there is nothing left of the unbearable ache. She is a soldier, after all, a thing of steel and gunpowder, trained to endure far worse than this. Wounds and injuries, they were ordinary, like rain or sun or anything or the natural world. Her knee, in particular, was a reminder. Of fingers digging into her skin, of smoke burning her eyes, of how her tongue would twist to mimick affluence. Of her knee hitting the bottom of the boat.

She swore under her breath. Maybe Glassy run really did wash up the cigar, and maybe she is asking too much of it, but as Sofiya finds the healer in the corner of the inn, she dares to hope that the river had taken the Lyktin man without mercy.

Sofiya Maryin doesn't meet Asli's gaze. It is too soft, too warm for a creature so accustomed to winter. Her gaze is directed at the healer's hands, her means to an end. For a moment, she is silent, collecting words on her tongue. She is not about to deviate from her simple truth. So, she demands.

»My knee is fucking killing me and you're gonna do something about it.«

#˚✧ INTERACTIONS. #˚✧ INTERACTIONS: SOFIYA. #thank you thank you thank you !! <3 #injury tw #drowning tw #˚✧ EVENT. #˚✧ EVENT: THE PRISON.

[undyinghope]

victoria hannan kokomo

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#˚✧ INTROSPECTION.

[undyinghope]

asli nods at her friend in confirmation , lips twisting in a bit of apprehension. mikhail was good at keeping his card close to his chest , and that included his emotions. ultimately , when sasha tells that they and mikhail had a good visit , this gives asli a bit of ease. simply thinking about two people she cares about having a nice conversation was enough to lighten her mood. pockets of good are everywhere ; in a warm cup of tea , a walk in nature or a conversation with a friend. it's so simply , but enough.

 life comes in clusters. heartbreak , happiness , solitude. this time around , it's the pride for her friend that marks this moment for asli. intrigued eyes follow the way sasha's finger moves against their jaw. blinking back to sasha's hues , a sound of absolute excitement comes from asli. she feels so proud of her friend. " sasha , that's amazing! you are amazing! " encouragement shines in her blue eyes , warm and soft. asli has always known that sasha has so much potential and having alanka to help unlock that potential was a fantastic step in sasha understanding her power. sasha's abilities don't add up to their worth as a person or member of this crew. at least , not to asli. though and if they ever needed a reminder , asli will do so in a heartbeat. but , for now , she will give her friend the praise they rightfully deserve. " you've accomplished so much already. i really can't wait to see what you're going to next. " 

taking sasha’s hands with ease , asli grips onto her friends digits ; a mixture of endearment for her friend and the need for comfort courses through her. “ i am too , i've missed him , ” the comment comes wistfully as she thinks back on the cool mornings spent on the front porch with a warm drink before starting early duties around the small farm. “ it was just as hard to leave him this time around then the first ... ” she trailed off this time, now remembering how much had gone undone and chores untouched sine she's been gone. her father was getting old , his bones weren’t a strong as they used to be. asli tries to not allow the sadness she feels seep into her features. she doesn't want sasha to worry. but she can't help but a despondent sigh escape past her lips , her eyes becoming downcast to the table top. " i know i'm supposed to be here , but i ─ i can't help but feel wrong for leaving him alone. "  

“ no! stars , no! ” asli exclaims, shaking her head with a big smile. dark brows are furrowed , though, she can't picture herself going out on a night of dancing. it sounds nice , of course. there's a lot happening in the moment , everything feels tense and important and the last thing asli wants to do is slip up ( it doesn't help that she has nothing nice to go out in ). she appreciates the invites from anton and she's positive it wont be the last by how adamant anton seemed. “ i had to tell him no so many times before he finally went off by himself. maybe next time. and maybe you’ll come with me? ” the healer beats her eyelashes , nudging her friend with a playfulness that she was never short of.  

A full smile rises to Sasha's face as Asli takes them into an embrace. There is nothing restrained in Asli's manner or her joy and it soothes something in Sasha. Makes them feel wholly loved and appreciated for little more than walking into the room. They weren't sure that anyone else had ever made them feel like that.

"Has he?" Sasha asks, some worry taking a shadow over their happiness. Though, that makes sense -- obviously something happened; is happening. That's why that were all called back, after all. Still, they hate to think that Mikhail was upset. "We had a nice visit," they settle on, unsure in their ability to cheer up their leader. Unsure that, as Asli said, they had really been missed so much.

Their concern over Mikhail shifts to the back of their mind as Asli brings up Alanka. "She is. She's well." Their time with Alanka had been wonderful, as always. The healer praised Sasha's progress in Tailoring and listened to all of their very boring stories about Starovsa. She pet Sasha's hair and smiled and asked questions and Sasha felt warm and safe. "And she said I was getting better." They give a proud smile, drawing one finger delicately along their jaw to indicate their tailoring ability.

Once settled into a booth with Asli, Sasha allows themself a moment to study their friend. She looks tired, but only slightly, just around the eyes. She's still beaming of course, but Sasha wonders if whatever is coming has been taking its toll on Asli as well as Mikhail. "I'm glad you had the time to see your father." Reaching across the slight space between them, Sasha laces one of their hands around one of Asli's. While Sasha's parents are more of a cold void in their life, it isn't the same for their friend. Something they would be envious about if they didn't love Asli quite so much.

"Did you go?" They ask, sparing a giggle for Anton's antics. Sasha isn't always sure about Anton, but Asli seems to like him which is good enough for them. "I doubt he thought you were useless. No one could ever. It's far more likely that he just enjoys your company. Who doesn't?"

#˚✧ INTERACTIONS. #˚✧ INTERACTIONS: SASHA.

[undyinghope]

september , with its cucumber leaves and calm air had all but disappeared ...

asli had been tossing and turning all night in the small bed she and sasha shared at the inn ( a habit they have always felt comfortable with ) , unluckily for sasha. she had tried to not think about how big of a day tomorrow . it was an opportunity for the crew to gather their bearings , that's all. yet , there was a certain tension in her bones that made asli fidget from the moment she rest her head on the pillow the previous night to the moment this morning when she decided sleep was not coming. fed up , she leaves sasha a note: gone to king's hoard. be safe. love you , a. after putting on a layer of two thin sweaters , an over - sized jacket and with a gentle kiss to the tailor's temple , asli leaves the warmth of the inn and into the october weather that has over in a blur of bitter chill and cold winds.

now , she starts her short journey toward the markets , head craned up toward the dark skies as a hawk , dove - grey and crimson in colour , had caught her attention. his cry from the hooklike beak , echoes in the autumn morning air ; a shriek that sounds like steel , the sound that lingers in wavelets. wind from the north lifts him high above , bravely he allows the drift to lead. this sighting gives her the courage to start , but the discipline to focus and the confidence to figure it out was hardly there.

hearing the familiar greeting , asli turns halfway to met the dark eyes of the volki leader. “ mikhail. hi , good morning , ”  her tone is light , a bit of otherness to it , a tiredness. mikhail looks at her and she looks down to her boots a little too quickly. she knows that tone and she knows that look. it isn't the first time mikhail has approched her with reservations. fingerless gloves allow her to chew on the dry skin around her nails in a nervous tick. she can already see where this conversation is going and what mikhail is implying. " surveillance , of course. " the way she doesn't specific who the surveillance will be for is harshly obvious and almost makes her regret saying anything at all. she wants to be able to be trusted. she doesn't want to be a liability. it makes her stomach feel heavy.

stuffing her hands into the over-sized jacket , asli goes on in a way to convince mikhail ; her voice rises from the fog of uncertainty. “ you’ve been training me for three years to not get caught up in distractions. and i've been able to hide myself in these markets for much longer , ” the king's hoard is the only place she truly feels comfortable scoping out. giving a sure nod , “ i can do this. ” besides , being closer to her father , having an eye on him and knowing where he was would make asli feel better , a bit more at ease. only a little. her shoulders her stiff and she kept having to reminder herself to unclench her jaw.

who: @undyinghope where: outside rendezvous point inn; near markets when: october 5th @ 7:30am

There had been a disquiet in the journey here. His attentiveness had been divided. Largely it focused on the task at hand; his thoughts spiraling again and again on the cargo lists as well as the lodgers. There was something there, he just couldn’t put his fingers on it yet. And, secondly, his thoughts stewed over taking his focus off of the South. Another matter he couldn’t figure out. It kept him quiet, and pensive, during the travel and more towards himself. So much so, he hadn’t had an opportunity to speak with two of his crew who might have reservations, or distractions, when it came to visiting Svel. He’d been meaning to, but he just hadn’t. He had decided, however, to make it a priority this morning. A priority that didn’t take much waiting as the two of them both seemed to be early birds, and he had no issues matching her stride walking outside of the inn. 

“Good morning, Asli,” he says in greeting, pulling his coat tighter around his form once the piercing morning wind whips around him. “Are you headed towards the market for surveillance or –” He cuts himself off with a knowing look in her direction, almost empathetic. He knew what, or actually who, could often be found selling his fresh baked goods bright and early, likely before the sun had fully risen. A person he hasn’t actually faced since his very first encounter with Asli. He lets out a sigh he had been holding on to then. One that has a tinge of apprehension to it. Whether that is apprehension for himself or her, is yet to be determined. “I have to ask now. Before everything.” Clasping his hands behind his back, slowing his movement, he continues carefully. “Is this going to be a distraction? Do you think it would be beneficial to place yourself in the markets selling baked goods with him, or should you go elsewhere?” His apprehension then leaks into something more of concern. “That last thing I would want is for him to be caught in the middle of our affairs. The Lyktin’s aren’t known for their niceties.” They were known for their smuggling; which included smuggling people.

#˚✧ INTERACTIONS. #˚✧ INTERACTIONS: MIKHAIL. #thank you for starting <3 <3 <3 #˚✧ EVENT. #˚✧ EVENT: THE PRISON.

[undyinghope]

#hehehe <3 #˚✧ CHARACTER STUDY. #˚✧ FEAT. #˚✧ FEAT. SASHA.

[undyinghope]

despite accepting the small praise with a gentle smile and a heart full of gratitude , asli shakes her head , humbly disagreeing. “ what makes you say that? ” looking at mikhail , her small head tilts one way in question , genuinely curious as to what she has to offer lev , if anything. “ lev has been in business for , well , actually i don’t know how long he’s been doing this for. decades , most likely! he'll be fine a few decades more without me. ” perhaps she could heal his burns and fix the sliced skin lev had cut himself on numerous occasions due to his scatterbrain and erratic behaviour.

as long as there is a one day , rings loudly. the hope is still there. it always is. usually , the hope is a quiet prayer , a whisper of trees, the silent anticipation of something better. this time , coming from mikhail , it's echoing around her like a symphony. since the day asli met mikhail , she’s felt that he needed to be reminded that there is beauty and serenity and peace waiting for him. it's not that his words of encouragement such a rarity , it's simply nice to hear mikhail's words resemble comfort. “ there’s always going to be a one day. every time the sun rises in the morning and sets in the evening , one day will be there. for the both of us. ” when you see someone holding the weight of the world on their shoulders , you can't help but feel a deep sense of compassion for them. it takes an incredible amount of strength and resilience to stand up and bear such a colossal load , but mikhail always seems to find the courage and determination to do so.   

the laugh mikhail shares with her is far and few between , so the sound makes her ears perk and her heart warm. “ are you kidding? you aren't going anywhere , i'll need you as a taste tester! ” mikhail had the unique ability to see the invisible threads that connected the hearts of everyone he encountered. each thread represented the emotions , struggles , and dreams that people carried with them. he brought them all together. he bears so much and she knows that's why he can be so stiff ─ she understands , on some level.

the gentle touch is a surprise , but a welcomed one. ever since this journey started , she couldn’t stop thinking about her parents. kerem , suffering years with a broken heart. her mother , ece , a woman she remembers little about and still manages to miss her with ever fiber of her being , but only now that it's entirely possible she's been out in the world. asli rests her hand over mikhail's with a gentle squeeze and gives a thankful smile. " i'm always imagining his face when we both arrive home , side by side ... ” kerem would talk about what he would have done differently the day ece was taken away from him. " for a time , the loss of my mother made everything so sharp. everything that she and my father used to do suddenly stopped. he was suffering. still is. the absences of my mother tore up the roots of my home. " teeth sink into one side of her cheek in the hopes to calm the swelling emotions stirring in the middle of her chest. " ... it's going to be wonderful having her back. ” inside the warm shop , asli gives mikhail a look. she can hear the uncertainty in his voice and she wishes she could tell mikhail that he can relax and enjoy the ride. she doesn't though. " well , first off , if you want to know what's good you have to look behind the counter. " everything at the front of the shop is ... edible enough. but not what she came for. she's been coming here too long and respects her team enough to not bring them back cookies that crumble or pumpkin loafs that are as dry as hot sand.

when asli catches the wide and rowdy eyes of the shopkeeper , he beckons his customers closer. ' the girl is right , ' he said, his voice filled with a raspy , yet magical charm. ' today , my dear friends , you have stumbled upon a momentous occasion! ' asli glances to mikhail and gives him a shrug. asli has been in and out of this shop numerous times for a couple of years now and only a few times has there been such occasions ─ and most of them , truthfully , never panned out as lev had intended. though , still intrigued, asli moves towards the gray - bricked counter and leans in , waiting for him to explain further. with a mischievous grin, he continued, ' you see , every item you taste here will unlock a hidden memory from the past or a glimpse into the future. are you ready to embark on this extraordinary journey? ' without hesitation , asli nods , surrendering herself to the whimsical surprises the little shop had in store. ' now , tell me , what flavours do you associate with your home life ? ' the shopkeeper asks. " oh , hmm ─ maybe ... vanilla , citrus , and ... ginger! " eyes sway towards mikhail , both healer and shopkeeper waiting for the man to give an answer.

“I can’t say I have.” He can’t actually recall the last time he has had the chance to witness what Rysk has to offer; which has always been considered very little. He has been absent from Rysk more often than not or his hands diligently scouring through piles of paperwork from their spies and scouting missions. He doesn’t often indulge in the smaller joys of life anymore, but he is content to see it through her eyes. Part of him delighted in the knowledge of how the crew can still be carefree. “Ah, well, I’ll take your word for it. Though, I’d say he might benefit from having you on board then.” In his experience, chaos has never prevailed. Chaos has only led to a quick demise and this is why he has never wanted to have too much chaos in his ranks. Though, there are always exceptions. He nods then, quick and easy, pleased with her answer. “As long as there is a one day. I know you still have a bright future ahead.” There is nothing that makes him happier than knowing they can still envision a future for themselves. That they haven't become as bleak as he, and that the hope in them is enough to have him continue on for them. And he doesn’t stop the soft laugh, just barely heard, when she mentions drawing the eye of even Katya. He knew Katya had a tendency to be hard on others and could be the toughest cookie to crack. Probably more so for Asli despite Mikhail's endless reminders to Katya that everyone serves a purpose here even if she doesn’t see it. “Even if she doesn't, you won’t be able to keep me away.” If he were still around. He’d like to see her flourish and find her place in the world. 

He watches the trepidation that ensues alongside the mentions of her family. Watches as she turns from him, grows less chatty, and is cursory in response. He wants to feel remorse for asking. But he doesn’t. It’s important. Family is important. There’s an importance to him that his crew continue to make time for those they love, and make an effort, as nobody knows more than he how much regret you'll feel when the time is abruptly ripped for you. It’s a thought he doesn’t allow himself to linger on. He desperately continues to pour focus into others, and into listening to her thoguhts on the short trip. When she looks back at him, though, there is a brief stutter. A quiet moment of despair at the grief in her eyes that makes him ache. A familiar ache that scorches his mood, but only for the tiniest of moments as he is too alert to ever really let his pain be shown or mirror hers. Instead, he lifts a hand to her cheek. To brush his thumb along her skin, fleeting in the comfort it offers. “He will be fine. Soon he’ll have both your mother and you at his side.” A promise he doesn’t mention often, but one he intends to keep. One he won’t ever quit investigating for her. “Then they can come to your bakery and spend endless time with you.” 

He lets his hand drop then, as he notices a disorderly man stumble towards the door with a cloud of smoke following him at the same second she is urging him forward. He can’t say he is thrilled to willingly burn his eyes red by stepping through the smoke. But the warmth of the bakery is preferable to the bitter cold of Rysk, and he told himself earlier he could have a few moments of reprieve today. Just a few. And he always finds himself just a tad more willing to relax when it comes to Asli. So he follows, and doesn’t forget to leave the door open as it will be the only sure way to clear the smoke as well as the perfuse smell of burnt baked goods. Mikhail is, however, slightly slower in movement now as he is out of his element. His expertise lies in tactics; in positioning people and executing ambushes. He wasn’t adept at picking out cookies. At all. So he defers to Asli. Letting her lead him this time, withholding any thoughts or judgment towards the countless trays of unsalvageable goods. At least he knew she wasn’t exaggerating. “You let me know what’s good here, Asli.” He insists, quite loudly, over the sound of Lev still rushing about as he wasn’t confident in anything he was seeing yet.

#˚✧ INTERACTIONS. #˚✧ INTERACTIONS: MIKHAIL. #i dky why but i'm having fun with lev lmaoo

[undyinghope]

𝐃𝐎𝐒𝐊𝐎𝐑𝐎𝐆𝐎 𝐓𝐀𝐒𝐊: 𝟎𝟎𝟏 , 𝘚𝘖𝘊𝘐𝘈𝘓 𝘔𝘌𝘋𝘐𝘈 𝘈𝘜.

asli wouldn't necessarily be instagram famous. she would have a lot of friends that follow her and most of the people she follows back are her friends/people she knows really well. she's an everyday person with a peaceful life , who works on the family farm , which she will eventually inherit from her aging father. her instagram documents as a sort of open journal ; what she's creating , what animal's she takes care of around the farm , what the sky looked like , how she feels while stumbling into a daydream while sitting in a breezy field. not everyone is a fan , but she keeps doing what she's doing. in this life , asli doesn't own a bakery , but she still sells fresh homemade bread and baked goods at the wednesday and saturday market in town with her father. eventually , with her easy - going nature , honest heart , and gentle disposition , asli would eventually gain a following that would lead her down a different path. aka , she gets her own little reality show and it's a hit!!

#doskorogotask001 #˚✧ AESTHETICS. #˚✧ EDIT. #˚✧ TASKS. #it's my hc that in the field day photo ... the person is sasha <3

[undyinghope]

asli hadn’t been keeping track of how long sasha had been gone for. it could have been two days , two weeks , or maybe two months. either way , asli wouldn’t have a clue because all she knew is that she missed her best friend with all of her heart. asli has missed sasha so much , and it's felt like a piece of her heart had been missing. They had gone from talking every day , sharing their room , a bed together , and then they had gone their separate ways to do what they needed to do before the meeting with mikhail and the rest of the volki … and it felt like she had been missing out on so much of what's been happening in sasha’s life. asli quickly realized she didn’t like that feeling. she missed their late night conversations , their inside jokes , and all the fun times they have together. asli eagerly awaited the day , the hour , the minute when sasha would return to rysk.

finally , that day arrived ─ the day filled with joy and excitement. as the sun began to shine on the beautiful summer afternoon , she couldn't contain her happiness as sasha came through the door and toward her without hesitation. in that magical moment of reunion , asli couldn't help but let an excited sound escape the back of her throat. her faces lights up with radiant smile as their embraced. asli’s own gentle laughter filled the air as the embraced in the middle of the shattered cup , giggling with happiness , like a carefree child. it was as if no time had passed and those two days , two weeks or two months didn’t matter at all. 

“ good! that gives us more time to chat! and i'm sure mikhail was happy to see you back. he's been tense over the last few weeks and your presence has been very missed. ”  alanka , the grisha who had saved sasha's life. asli didn't think about it until now , but she wonders if healers are inherently compassionate and so willing to save others without a second thought? ece , asli's mother. alanka , and now , well , herself. if she wants to be so bold to incline and add her own name after the talented healers before her. " how is alanka? i hope she's keeping well and busy. ” despite never meeting alanka herself , asli will always hold a space of admiration and gratefulness for the healer for saving sasha's life. if alanka hadn't , asli wouldn't have met her other half. it's a selfish reason , asli knows. but , now that sasha has entered her life , she can't imagine the other not in it ... and who knows how long asli would have survived without sasha by her side.

bringing them to a booth still hand in hand , asli doesn’t plan on staying for long. she was done here and sasha now has her full and devoted attention. but like sasha , she did want to catch up first. “ i didn’t do too much. i did go back to svel to see my father. i helped him get ready for the coming winter the best i could. ” she shrugs. other than her father , she had nothing else to take care of. “ anton tried to get me to go out dancing. i think he saw how useless i am without you and felt pity. ” asli a huff of a laugh , but she isn't sure if she finds it so funny.

Sasha doesn't love the Shattered Cup. Oh, it's quite nice as bars go, but that's part of the problem. It's nice enough and the drinks are good, which means there are often people there. Enough to start up a high whine of something close to anxiety rippling through their chest. But Asli hadn't been at their apartment or the bakery which really only left the bar.

At least Sasha is proved correct when they move through the door. And the smile rising like dawn over Asli's face is enough to soothe away the press of any crowd. Meeting their dearest friend halfway, Sasha scoops both of her hands in their own. "No, no. I just dropped everything off at our flat." Most everything. Sasha does have a small package wrapped in wax paper in their bag -- Asli's gift.

"I've been back a few days, actually." An intimate smile, almost somewhere else, floats along Sasha's face. "I stopped in to see Mikahil, and then I was visiting with Alanka." The healer at Taste of Nirvana, the one who saved Sasha's life just a few years ago and gave them their first confidence in what their own hands could do. "But yes, my travels were fine. Only coming from Sarovsa, it was hardly a journey." They know others in their party were coming from much further.

"I want to hear all about our time apart, though." Sasha squeezed Asli's hands in their own gently, just a hint of pressure that exuded tender affection.

#˚✧ INTERACTIONS. #˚✧ INTERACTIONS: SASHA.

[undyinghope]

miu miu 1999 pocket boots

#˚✧ ENSEMBLE. #asli absolutely wears boots that have pockets

[undyinghope]

for the most part , asli simply wanted to stay out everyone's way and stick to her healing practices. she isn't tough , she isn't fast. she isn't a leader nor a soldier. she's someone who simply wants to make it through. with that being said , it doesn't mean asli hasn't come to admire the talents that her fellow volki hold in great abundance and with such ease. unfortunately , where there is admiration comes asli's insecurities. some days it feels like there’s a big empty void where there’s supposed to be something ; something that is perpetually missing. or days , it feels like being uncomfortably naked and vulnerable. she tries to make up for it , but there's only so much one can bring to the table with such little experience. asli , in her eyes , brings seedlings and grapes to a feast , where brought a boar , fish and other savoury foods.  “ i won’t stay long , " she insists quickly , knowing that katya isn’t much of a talker. unfortunately for the other grisha , asli is drawn to conversation and truthfully , she wanted to know where everyone was at. emotionally , that is. as she was trying to think of something to say or bring up a topic they could both connect on. katya surprisingly beat her to the punch - and asli couldn't be anymore delighted. “ it’s nice to see everyone together , ” she muses gently. it’s a genuine answer , but genuine doesn’t mean completely true. she’s been feeling a little displaced , watching everyone mingle. asli herself feels incredibly out of place despite trying to push herself into the spaces , to force herself to fit. maybe she’s starting to get too much in her head , overthinking that leaving her father was a bad decision. it doesn’t help that she isn’t comfortable out here. " and you? are you enjoying yourself would you rather be elsewhere? " asli grins a small knowing grin over at katya. 

While Katya was reluctantly beginning to get to know the rest of the Volki, it did not mean she was suspicious of whether she could truly trust these individuals, some of whom she would have to learn to leave her fate in gradually. And wasn't that a rather frightening thought? She knew what it meant to be helpless and dependent upon someone else's whims, and Katya had sworn that she would never allow herself to be in this position again. Never again. As Katya finally removed her attention from the bonfire towards the nearing figure, a slight sardonic smirk appeared upon her lips as she witnessed Asli with her arms full of firewood that she had obviously brought to ensure that the fire would not go out. Naive little thing. The flames hadn't even begun to die down yet. Didn't she realise that Maksim could so easily set it alight if needed? Crossing her legs to observe the relaxed nature of Asli, she raised an eyebrow as the other seemed unaffected by her cold nature. What a shame, she had hoped her remarks would have afforded her a bit more of separation from the others. It seemed she would have to endure the company of Asli, if at least for the next bit. Hopefully, Maksim or Varyis would come over at some point to rescue her. Or Svetlana. "Make yourself at home." She replied, her fingers itching yet again for a bottle of alcohol or some liquor so that she could have something of comfort for this conversation at least. "Why, thank you." Unsure of how to exactly continue the discussion, she asked, "And how have you been enjoying this little gathering?" 

#˚✧ INTERACTIONS. #˚✧ INTERACTIONS: KATYA. #˚✧ EVENT: BONFIRE.

[undyinghope]

AYÇA AYŞIN TURAN   |   1.01  －  Kader Bağları

#˚✧ VISAGE. #the hair! the smile! the vibes! #soooo very asli <3