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I have myself for what I’ve become.

I don’t even know myself anymore.

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When you realise you’re not good enough for anything.

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It’s amazing how worthless someone can make you feel only by saying one thing. Honestly, great. Just great.

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True Friends // Bring Me The Horizon

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I am still hurt. I am still depressed. Maybe even more depressed now than I was before. I don’t know if I can trust anyone ever again. I really don’t think I can.

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I just need someone to hug me and tell me I’m not as worthless as I think I am.

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Eleanor Ruth Londo May 19, 2018 0221 Born at 35 weeks and 6 days.

She is in the NICU and has been since she was 5 minutes old. Tomorrow she will be 2 weeks old. We’re waiting for her to eat her meals without a feeding tube now. Please send positive thoughts and vibes for my little love.

#mumblr #may baby #may 19 2018 #preemie #premature #nicu #nicu life

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I feel void of happiness. What is it? I don’t know anymore.

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6 weeks 4 days

Aversions are strong. Nausea comes and goes. Craving for breakfast sausage is strong. Very strong.

#pregblr #baby number 2 #baby 2

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Christian is driving me up the wall today.

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5 weeks.

I’m 5 weeks pregnant today. Everyday I pray that this baby sticks. That I’ll have another perfect little baby to hold.  Christian doesn’t quite understand that he’s going to be a big brother, and I don’t think he will until the baby is here. That’s okay though. He’ll be a good big brother. He’s so sweet, kind, and caring. That’s all I could ask for in my children.