21grammaa

[21grammaa]

[21grammaa]

“I’ve never been very good at leaving things behind. I tried, but I have always left fragments of myself there too, like seeds awaiting their chance to grow.”

— Joanne Harris

[21grammaa]

We all loved harambe

[21grammaa]

me: i think i look okay today

my body dysmorphia as soon as i step outside:

[21grammaa]

vibes of that experimental time in animated kids movies: alt indie, gay, STRONG aesthetic, weirdly dark, epic world-building, gay again, found family as fuck, demon ladies, cat ladies, father issues, SHIPS AND STUFF

idk what was UP with this time period, but I want to embody whatever these vibes were into my very soul

[21grammaa]

Ducks on the ceiling. Via u/thederpimal

[21grammaa]

angery!

[21grammaa]

[21grammaa]

Get out of my face like that

[21grammaa]

[21grammaa]

Me: almost caused myself to have a trauma induced panic attack

Me, two minutes later: okay but what if that abuse wasn’t real

[21grammaa]

[21grammaa]

the trauma moods

i wonder why my life is in shambles that's weird

i'm going to redesign my room and paint a portrait and binge watch six shows and dye my hair and start a makeup brand and write a novel and read poetry and clean my whole house and

i Can't Get Out Of Bed

uh oh sisters! *showers with the lights off*

cries in the car and almost crashes accidentally

tv static noises

*wakes up* [redacted] *goes to sleep*

i haven't slept in 72 hours and i'm talking a lot about ophelia and reciting hamlet's soliloquies and everyone around me is worried

trying to sleep but there's Something In My Room

*texts abuser(s)* oh this is a fantastic idea

i'm horny and angry about it

i'm horny and sad about it

masturbates and then cries

If You Touch Me I Will Kill You

*thinks about trauma* oh that sucks for whoever that was

oh, wait, that actually happened?????

Shame

i'm going to starve myself until i'm so small no one will want me

i'm going to overeat until i'm so big no one will want me

*throws up for unknown reason*

talk about trauma, but make it funny

I CAN'T DO SOMETHING REALLY SIMPLE AND INSTEAD OF WORKING THROUGH IT I'M GONNA YELL AND HURT MYSELF UNTIL I GET TIRED

i have forgotten every single coping skill i've ever learned

hnnnnnnng

*listens to music from That Time and gets weirdly nostalgic*

i Want To Be Abused

i will never love again! ever!

confuses platonic and romantic emotions because anything that feels Good is confusing

[21grammaa]

[21grammaa]

[21grammaa]

[21grammaa]

Shoutout to everyone who doesn’t actually have a solid best friend because their best friends have better best friends or because they don’t bond enough with people to have best friends, or because their ‘best friends’ constantly come and go and it just kinda leaves them feeling vaguely isolated even though they might have plenty of regular friends.