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when i came out as trans i had an old friend from my church days message me to congratulate me and ask me for my name and pronouns. and i was shocked tbh cause he was such a head-deep-up-the-church’s ass kind of guy so i was super wary.

and after digging a little deeper i found out that he was very supportive of transness, saying that trans men are men and trans women are women

BUT

he also believed in the church’s gender roles meaning that trans women had to marry men and be submissive wives and trans men had to marry women and be strong christian husbands.

which is like ????

the weirdest and most surreal form of trans inclusive misogyny i’ve ever seen.

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is it just me or is the "trans guys are just some boring guys and they make lame music and trans women are cool and interesting and make loud music" jokes almost like. an excuse for why theres not that many trans guys who are popular content creators or musicians or actors or authors or what have you. like blaming the invisibility of trans men on being "boring" and therefore not doing anything rather than oppression.

not to mention the example of music being that people have heard of one singular trans guy who works in a genre they dont like [people really love to act like cavetown is like specifically bad or cringe but thats just what most indie pop/rock/folk sounds like] and theyve heard of a handful of trans women who make hyperpop that they already like [and laura jane grace of course] and its really telling on themselves. theres trans guys making hyperpop and trans women making ""lame ukulele music"" and both of them and nonbinary people making music of tons of other genres. like. cmon. it reminds me of xkcd 385.

also i dont think these jokes are intentionally malicious or anything [most of the time] but it also feels sort of weird to be joking about how boring a group of marginalized people are. im not going to act like its the biggest deal in the world but its sort of low level bullying, innit? and i imagine having this weird expectation to be "cool and interesting" isnt fun for trans women either. its nice to get to be lame sometimes.

Yeah it's super weird, especially because it's repeated over and over, that part is the suspicious part. I even saw it on reddit a few days ago in one of the ftm subs. I do think it's like blaming the lack of trans men artists on trans men being "boring" instead of, you know the bigotry, the erasure, the inequality I think it's also a weird expectation that we all HAVE to live up to what other people think of as "cool" like if we're all not making hardcore metal and being as "SICK" as humanly possible, we are failing at transgender music and therefore are the reason trans men aren't represented as artists enough, which is ummm. okay.

why can't we make soft love songs about being bugs, or whatever. What happens to trans women who don't live up to the metal hardcore aesthetic? Look at Dylan Mulvaney. She made a dumb cutsie girlypop song and everyone acted like she is the founder of misogyny herself. So not only are we ridiculed for the music we make, we're trapped in transphobic expectations of what music we can or should make.

If you expect all trans women to make metal, you'll only see trans women who make metal, if you expect all trans men to make soft music, that's all you'll find! because that's all you looked for! Another thing is like, Oh all trans women music is cool and hardcore rock and roll, but trans men music is dumb and cutsie ukulele music? I wonder what gender those genres are normally associate with? Uhoh we're doing a sexism maybe the person making the joke doesn't have malicious intent, but the joke itself sure does.

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perhaps some will disagree, but i think the world got worse when we changed the colour of the night

#red gives horror vibes #but anything is better than the white or blue that's so freaking popular rn #a stretch of highway in my area tried purple for a bit (at least a month idk if it's still there now) and it was ok #kind if jarring tho bc it was just like 1/4 mile #and everything else was still white

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thinking about how when you experience a lot of shame in your formative years (indirectly, directly, as abuse or just as an extant part of your environment) it becomes really difficult to be perceived by other people in general. the mere concept of someone watching me do anything, whether it's a totally normal activity or something unfamiliar of embarrassing, whether I'm working in an excel spreadsheet or being horny on main, it just makes my skin crawl and my brain turn to static because I cannot convince myself that it's okay to be seen and experienced. because to exist is to be ashamed and embarrassed of myself, whether I'm failing at something or not, because my instinctive reaction to anyone commenting on ANYTHING I'm doing is to crawl into a hole and die. it's such a bizarre and dehumanizing feeling to just not be able to exist without constantly thinking about how you are being Perceived. ceaseless watcher give me a god damn break.

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saw a tiktok of a mother taking her very tiny daughter to an art museum and she’s just walking around going “whoooa” “woooaah” to everything but then they got to a marble statue of a nude woman lying on her back and the girl points and goes “mommy🫵” and i just immediately welled up with tears and all the comments are just laughing about it and of course it’s funny but how are you not insanely moved by the way art connects everyone on earth from a centuries-old sculptor to a toddler in 2023

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You don’t say.

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Okay so someone shared this link on the server for the Chronicles of Darkness game I've been running since 2020 and I looked at the link and went 'yeah right' and then I read the article and went 'hunh' and then I watched the first three episodes of 'Knuckles,' which didn't take long because each episode is about half an hour long, and actually I fucking cried my eyes out at the big fight that is referenced because like... it's ... good, actually?

The show is very silly, and a lot of the humor is very childish, which makes a lot of sense, right, because it's about a fucking video game, but, at least so far, it's an extremely sincere show.

The siblings in this show act like highly exaggerated siblings. Of course adults wouldn't act like this, but it doesn't matter, because that's not really who the show is for. The show is for kids. It's goofy. The heart of sibling rivalry is there. The heart of hurting over a parent who abandoned you is there. The heart of a parent missing a family tradition is there.

The jokes that are made are made with love for Jewishness. Whoever made the food jokes has eaten a lot of gefilte fish and matzoh ball soup. Whoever wrote the episode understands how important it is that nothing puts out the Shabbat candles. Whoever wrote the episode understands the importance of minhagim -- the traditions that are unique to your family, to your synagogue, whatever.

Clearly they're not shomer Shabbos because their traditions include watching movies after Shabbat dinner, but that's not presented as them being Bad Jews -- it's just their family tradition, and that's just how it is.

Mom's bracha for the candles has the 'Adenoy' pronunciation which is so very New York Older Ashkenazi Jewish that it made my heart ache and made me powerfully homesick for the East Coast, since so many of the older people at my old shul used that specific pronunciation.

The fact that they literally centered a pair of Shabbas candles (with what are clearly kosher candles burning!!) in the fight, and the entire fight revolves around those candles? It just hit me right in the middle of the chest.

There's a difference between a show being silly and a show being insincere, and Knuckles is silly but it's not insincere. I will fully admit that I watched the first three episodes to get to the episode entitled The Shabbat Dinner, but you know... I might just finish the series? It's got heart, and all of the actors are clearly having such a good time. It's one of those projects that I refer to as a Summer Camp Show/Movie, where everybody's getting a nice paycheck and having a very good time and not taking themselves too seriously.

Plus, Christopher Lloyd made me laugh until I choked.

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this video now

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"well if it's not androgynous what should a nonbinary person look like??" ***EXTREMELY LOUD BUZZER SOUND*** WRONG!!!! YOU GOT IT ALL WRONG!!!!!!! NOBODY "SHOULD" ANYTHING!!!! THAT IS NOT WHAT QUEERNESS IS ABOUT!!!!! GO TO THE CALM DOWN CORNER AND THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU'VE JUST SAID.

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adults are always talking about how “kids will do anything to get out of school” and okay, first of all that’s not true, but I think we really need to ask why that idea holds so much sway.

children’s brains are hard-wired to take in new information and acquire new skills. consider, for a moment, just how thoroughly our society had to fuck up the concept of education for it to be a normal thing to assume kids are universally desperate to avoid learning.

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“Nobody’s going to want to sit on high-speed rail for fifteen hours to get from New York City to LA.”

Me. I will sit on high-speed rail for fifteen hours. I’ll sit on it for days. I’ll write and read and nap and eat and then do it all over again. I’ll stare out the windows and see America from ground level and not have to drive. I’ll see the Rockies and the deserts and cornfields and the Mississippi River and your house and yours and yours too. I’ll make up stories in my head about the small towns I see as we go along. I’ll see the states I’ve yet to see because driving or flying there is a fucking slog and expensive to boot. I’ll enjoy the ride as much as the destination. And then I’ll do it all over again to come the fuck home.

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Something about having an universal translator, and learning to understand without it

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I made these 👍

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I must not mock Gen Alpha. Mocking Gen Alpha is the mind killer. Mocking Gen Alpha is the little-death that brings total generational solidarity obliteration. I will engage with Gen Alpha lovingly. I will permit them to be cringe. And when they grow up I will turn my eye to their accomplishments. Where mocking has gone there will be nothing. Only generational solidarity remains