arrestjellyfish

[arrestjellyfish]

a winter's tale (chapter 1)

Remus goes to a winter break party... so does his love-stricken brother, his meddling roommate, his nosy-ass friends, and, oh yeah, his totally-not-a-crush. What could go wrong?

Read here on AO3

~

“You need to tell him.”

“I’m not gonna tell him. You need to tell him.”

“Well, I’m not gonna tell him!”

“Children, please,” Janus said tiredly. “Daddy’s trying to read.”

Roman glowered at his roommate from across the kitchen table. “Please don’t ever refer to yourself as ‘daddy’ in my presence.”

“Oh, can I call you daddy?” Remus asked, chipper and bright even in the midst of yet another spat with his brother over the breakfast table. He flopped over the back of Janus’ shoulders, wrapping his arms around his chest and making obnoxious kissing noises against the back of his head. Janus patted his arm.

“A tempting offer, but no thank you,” he replied. “I’d rather not become yet another excuse why you refuse to confess your hopeless crush on Logan.”

Remus gagged, moving to step away, but Janus suddenly grabbed his forearms and kept him from leaving the conversation.

“Truly, it’d be such a shame for yet another year of your friendship to come and go without you finding the balls to inform him of your growing romantic feelings for him,” Janus continued.

Remus hissed and struggled against the hold Janus had on him.

“Ah, yes, a perfectly mature response. I’m shaking in my slippers.”

“And it’s not like he’d get mad about it!” Roman added. “Even if Lo doesn’t feel the same way, he has the right to know how badly you want him!”

“And you have the right to ask for what you want from him.”

“Maybe he’ll say he likes you too!”

“Or maybe he’ll reject you, and you can focus your attention on rebuilding your shattered pride and redirecting your emotions toward self love instead.”

Remus stopped struggling. “Oh, I love myself plenty, thank you very much.”

“Yes, I know, we share a wall,” Janus replied. Roman gagged.

“No sex talk at the table, please?”

Remus quirked his head. “Is masturbation sex?”

“You know who would love to have that fascinating debate with you?” Janus interrupted suddenly. He twisted around to catch Remus’ eye without letting him out of his grasp. “Logan.”

Remus groaned. He dropped his head against Janus’ shoulder, banging it softly. “Why are we even talking about me? Roman’s the one who almost sucked face with Virgil last night.”

“We had a moment,” Roman corrected primly. “And… yes, perhaps said moment would’ve been nicely bookmarked with a proclamation of my long-term romantic interest in him, but a bitch is anxious, okay?”

“And if you hadn’t been so distracted eating all of the cookies I literally just baked yesterday,” Janus said to Remus, “then you would’ve heard that Roman actually does intend to profess his love tonight.”

“Bullshit! That’s what he’s said before every winter break party we’ve been to for the last two years!”

“I have a plan!” Roman insisted. “Virgil always leaves parties early, and I know he walks home because he doesn’t want to ask anyone to leave the party to drive him— I’ll find him before he leaves, ask to accompany him home, we’ll have a wonderfully romantic midnight stroll, I’ll time my confession so that I finish just as we’re arriving to his house—”

“Do not make a joke about finishing,” Janus muttered just as Remus opened his mouth.

“Wherein he will have the immediate escape option of going inside if he needs time to process my declaration!” Roman finished triumphantly.

“Is that honestly your plan?” Remus asked.

“It is exactly my plan, brother dear.”

Janus hummed. “And how many times have you attempted to initiate this plan by offering to walk Virgil home, only to chicken out halfway back to his house?”

Roman stuck his tongue out in lieu of answering. And people say Remus is the immature one.

“Well, you have fun with that!” Remus announced, finally pulling himself away from Janus’ grasp. “While you’re pussy-footing around with Virgil, Jan and I’ll be starting our bi-annual semester-ender bender.”

“Unless…” Janus started, before trailing off. Remus froze and looked at him.

“Unless?”

Janus cocked his head and gave Remus an appraising look. “Unless you… follow Roman’s footsteps…”

Remus’ jaw dropped. “Oh, fuck off.”

Janus scoffed, slapping down his newspaper. “Well, at least Roman is trying to pursue his romantic endeavors. You, on the other hand, you’d rather— what? Dance around the subject until you and Logan both finish grad school and your opportunity will be lost to the sands of time?”

“Tonight’s the perfect opportunity!” Roman added. “He’ll be so relieved the semester’s over, he’ll probably start making out with you on the dance floor right then and there. Isn’t that what you want?”

A spark of something hot and sharp burst in Remus’ chest. “You don’t know what the fuck I want.”

He knew of all people, his brother and his roommate were the least likely to be shocked by his outbursts, but even they stopped the ribbing to look at him cautiously. Which Remus hated, because cautious borders on concern which borders on pity, even though he knew that they were just trying to be respectful of his feelings. Bastards.

Because, in reality… Roman really didn’t know what Remus wanted. Remus really didn’t know what Remus wanted. He didn’t know if he wanted to kiss Logan or to hold hands with him, if his fantasies of them two of them together ending with fucking or cuddling, if he even wanted Logan to do anything other than look at him and listen to him and talk with him. That’s all he could think to ask of Logan: he just wanted to hang around him all the time.

Not like he was actually going to ask Logan anything.

“You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do,” Roman said softly, pulling Remus out of his stupor. He rolled his eyes, half on instinct and half to diffuse the tension in the room.

“Oh, don’t get soft on me, Pissy. We all know I do what I want, when I want— and what I want is to get fucking smashed at this party tonight. Not dragged down by a bunch of sappy confession shit.”

Roman snorted, raising his hands in surrender. “Message received, Gross-feratu. All I ask is that you consider your options— can you think of any better time to have an emotional conversation with Logan than immediately after his final exams are over, when his endorphins levels are at their peak?”

“And at the risk of sounding… altruistic,” Janus added, nose wrinkling with distaste, “I believe you owe it to him to tell him how you feel.”

Remus stuck his tongue out. “Since when do you prioritize other people’s feelings over your own self interest?”

“Since the two of you brought Patton home like a stray,” Janus replied drily. “Besides, the only thing I like more than deception is blackmail. Tell Logan you want to pursue a romantic relationship with him, or I will.”

“Me too!” Roman chimed in. Remus fixed him with a glare.

“Want me to snitch to Emo Nightmare about your little crush, Princeypie?”

“It’ll be mutually assured destruction, dear brother.”

“Yeah? Then I guess you won’t mind if I tell Virgil about all the poetry you’ve written for him.”

“Well, then I’ll tell Logan about the drawings you’ve done of him.”

Remus flushed. “That’s— that’s different, you piece of shit—”

“Aw, what’s wrong? You thought we didn’t notice all the times you pulled up his Instagram just to stare at his pretty face?”

“Don’t call him pretty, zit head!” Remus snapped, bounding around the table and reaching for Roman. Roman squawked and jumped out of his chair just in time for the two of them to begin racing in circles around the dining room table like a couple of cartoon characters.

Janus sighed, flipping to the next page of his newspaper. “One day. One day they’ll kill each other and then I’ll be free.”

[arrestjellyfish]

Worldbuilding Questions: Other* Cultures - a handy list for writers with little time

(*not the main characters')

After my extensive [list of questions for towns and cities] for your main setting, there will also be many countries, regions and cultures mentioned in your project, that aren't central to the plot, that you don't have time to delve into detail about, but that still should feel 'real'.

For this use (or, really, in general, if you don't have much time to worldbuild before you start your first draft), I prepared a list with 10 very rough, basic questions to make your world feel alive:

What is their most important export good or economy?

What was the most important event in their recent history, and how long ago did it happen?

What do people from that place wear and how do they style? Are they distinguishable in a crowd?

What is their language, and is it understandable for your narrator? Do they have an accent?

What are they famous for? (People from there, their humor, their food, their skills at something...)?

Are or were they at war / at the brink of war with other people; esp. with those at the center of your story?

What is their most important difference to your "main" / narrator's culture? (Religion, society, economy...?)

Are representatives of that culture seen often in your setting?

What is something outsiders say about them?

What do they say about themselves?

I recommend thinking about these for your side character's home cultures, as well as for your setting's most important regions and neighboring countries. Five or so might even be enough, just as a handy ressource to make your setting feel alive and real.

[arrestjellyfish]

Thomas is trying to sleep, so Logan sends Roman and Patton to bed. He doesn't bother with Virgil, whose vivid glittery purple eyeshadow makes it clear he's way too keyed up to sleep. He also stays awake himself, since they know from experience leaving Thomas alone with his Anxiety-- especially an overexcited/overenergetic Anxiety-- is not a good idea. Thirty minutes later, Virgil has completely exhausted himself-- his excitement eating up all the energy it produces and more-- and almost falls asleep on the couch, and Logan coaxes him to bed.

#awww :((

[arrestjellyfish]

Analogical Week 2: Electric Boogaloo

Analogical Week 2022 is on its way! The event is currently in a planning phase. Prompts + content rules are currently set to come out in mid to late December and the event will occur in early April

Similar to last year, an Interest Check form has been created! This form is also being used to collect prompt suggestions as well as general suggestions/feedback. Filling out this form is completely optional.

If you have any questions or additional prompt suggestions later on, please send an ask! Thank you!

#woo !!

[arrestjellyfish]

I’m a writer…theoretically. But I don’t have the spark inside me it seems. Without being egotistical I know on a technical level I’m a very good writer and I like writing - but it seems like I’ve been stuck in a rut for years (I’m 23 so …it’s been a long time) with no ideas or creative juices. So many authors talk about having a story inside of them that they want to write but I feel like a barren landscape of ideas - there’s nothing! And when I do sit down and try to flesh things out into actual plot and characters, it seems to suck any of the creativity away and it becomes lacklustre. Did you go through periods of your life where writing was this hard? I want to write…but I feel like I have nothing to write. It frustrates me to know I’m wasting my talent

You’re 23. Right now you’re gathering the material and the life experience that will give you things to write about in the future. You’re finding out what you have to say in order to say it.

There’s a reason why most writers aren’t published at 23, and it’s not because their books are rejected. It’s because they don’t have anything important to say, yet. Their lives are composting down and the stories that will grow on those compost heaps are often still only green shoots.

Don’t worry. Read a lot. Experience life a lot. Get fired. Work in some weird jobs. Get your heart broken. Discover what you have to say.

[arrestjellyfish]

Sometimes I put off doing something because I'm worried that I'll do it badly or I'll make a mistake. As long as I never do it, I can't do it wrong, right?

Except not doing it at all is worse than doing it badly. If I do it badly, at least it's still done. If I don't do it, it just hangs over me forever like a thundercloud.

I either need to make peace with the fact that I'm going to make mistakes or I need to stop trying to do new things. This interminable span of time where I'm stuck wanting to do the thing and not actually doing it is driving me fucking nuts.

#hmmmmm #truuuuu #i should write ruh roh

[arrestjellyfish]

Hello Sir!

I’m a university student and I’ve been assigned a project where I have to write a paper with a partner. We’re both a little lost on how we’re supposed to write as a team and we were wondering how you and Mr. Pratchett wrote Good Omens together? What did that process look like? Did you trade off chapters, or?

Thank you! I love your work!

Have lunch and talk about it with your partner. What are your strong points? What are theirs? Which of you likes structure? Which likes writing and finding out what happens? Who loves creating but hates editing? Who loves editing but dreads a blank page?

Find out who you both are and then play to your strengths.

[arrestjellyfish]

The real joy of fanfiction is getting to read several versions of the exact same, oddly specific plot written by different people and seeing the small ways things differ and falling in love with every one.

[arrestjellyfish]

That moment, hopefully more than one but especially the first one, when you're reading a fanfic and a character says something they never ever said in canon, but you hear it crystal clear in their voice in your head, when it hits so spot on in word use and syntax and characterization that you feel like you heard them say it, like it could have come straight from their mouth in canon even though it didn't, and you know this one's gonna be good

[arrestjellyfish]

its so freeing when you realize you can literally write whatever you want 

[arrestjellyfish]

but i don’t want to write my wip your honour i want to read the completed story

[arrestjellyfish]

One fear: Publishing one of my drafts without realizing that it still includes something like “so that’s why [FIND A WAY TO PHRASE THIS THAT DOESN’T SOUND FUCKING STUPID LMAO] is very important :)”

#the realest

[arrestjellyfish]

I saw a post talking about how Terry Pratchett only wrote 400 words a day, how that goal helped him write literally dozens of books before he died. So I reduced my own daily word goal. I went down from 1,000 to 200. With that 800-word wall taken down, I’ve been writing more. “I won’t get on tumblr/watch TV/draw/read until I hit my word goal” used to be something I said as self-restraint. And when I inevitably couldn’t cough up four pages in one sitting, I felt like garbage, and the pleasurable hobbies I had planned on felt like I was cheating myself when I just gave up. Now it’s something I say because I just have to finish this scene, just have to round out this conversation, can’t stop now, because I’m enjoying myself, I’m having an amazing time writing. Something that hasn’t been true of my original works since middle school. 

And sometimes I think, “Well, two hundred is technically less than four hundred.” And I have to stop myself, because - I am writing half as much as Terry Pratchett. Terry fucking Pratchett, who not only published regularly up until his death, but published books that were consistently good. 

And this has also been an immense help as a writer with ADHD, because I don’t feel bad when I take a break from writing - two hundred words works up quick, after all. If I take a break at 150, I have a whole day to write 50 more words, and I’ve rarely written less than 200 words and not felt the need to keep writing because I need to tie up a loose end anyways. 

Yes, sometimes, I do not produce a single thing worth keeping in those two hundred words. But it’s much easier to edit two hundred words of bad writing than it is to edit no writing at all.

[arrestjellyfish]

Yesterday was a bad writing day. I spent a lot of time staring at a screen. Lots of Tumblr replies. Lots of Twitter (the Netflix Sandman trailer going out didn’t help). Lots of being grumpy at myself and convinced I couldn’t do it any more. The script was a mess. I was doomed. This morning I printed out what I had to fix, picked up a pen, made a few notes and started typing. It was fun and easy and straightforward. I finished it and sent it to the people who needed to see it, and just got an amazed call from our script editor saying she was laughing while crying and couldn’t work out how I’d done everything in a day.

And I hadn’t done it all in a day. All of the being miserable yesterday was necessary for it to fly today. All of the knowing it was insoluble and awful made the work today relatively easy. I had to get out of my own way, and had to read it freshly, without being attached to anything. And then I just did the notes. And to make the thing that worked today, a lot of stuff that didn’t quite work or sort of worked had to be written too. It’s always easier to fix stuff that exists.

Anyway. Yesterday = bad writing day. Today = good writing day. I thought it was worth telling people, in case there was anyone else out there who was having a bad writing day too.

[arrestjellyfish]

I took some historical sword-fighting lessons to make the fights in my novel more realistic - here’s what I learned.

To make the fighting scenes in my low fantasy novel more realistic, I went to see a trainer for historical sword-fighting last week, both to barrage her with questions and to develop realistic choreographies for the fight scenes in the novel. Since I figured some of what she told me might be useful for you too, I put together a small list for you. Big thanks to Gladiatores Munich and Jeanne for making time! (Here are some more pictures if you’re interested.)

Caveat: I’m by no means a sword-fighting expert myself, so take these nuggets with a grain of salt – I might have misremembered or misinterpreted some of the things Jeanne told me. If I did, feel free to tell me.

1.) Weapon choices need to make sense

Let’s start with a truism: always ensure your character’s weapons make sense for a.) their profession, b.) their cultural background and c.) the environment they’re going to fight in. A farmer probably couldn’t afford a sword and might use a knife or threshing flail instead, and someone who doesn’t want to be noticed probably wouldn’t be milling about sporting a glaive or another large weapon. Also, soldiers native to a country with wide open plains would be more likely to carry long-range melee weapons such as spears or large swords, than those from a country consisting of mostly jungle or dense forests. The same applies to situations: if your character is going to be fighting in close quarters (even just a normal house), he’d get little value out of a spear or even a longsword, as there’d be no space to swing it effectively.

2.) Boldness often beats skill

In real swordfights, recklessness was often more important than technique. The fighter less afraid of getting injured would often push harder, allowing them to overpower even opponents with better technique.

3.) Even a skilled fighter rarely stands a chance when outnumbered

While a skilled (or lucky) fighter might win a two-versus-one, it’d be extremely unlikely for even a single master swordsman to win against superior numbers, even just three and if they’re below his skill level. The only way to plausibly pull this off would be to split the opponents up, perhaps by luring them into a confined space where you could take them on one by one. The moment you’re surrounded, you’re probably done for – because, unlike in Hollywood, they wouldn’t take turns attacking but come at you all at once.

4.) Dual-wielding was a thing

… at least in some cultures. I often heard people say that people using a weapon in each hand is an invention of fiction. And while my instructor confirmed that she knew of no European schools doing this—if they did, it’s not well-documented—she said it was a thing in other cultures. Example of this include the dual wakizashi in Japan or tomahawk and knife in North America. However, one of the biggest problems with the depiction of dual wielding in novels/movies/games are the “windmill”-type attacks where the fighter swings their weapons independently, hitting in succession rather than simultaneously. Normally you’d always try hitting with both weapons at once, as you’d otherwise lose your advantage.

5.) Longswords were amazing

Longswords might seem boring in comparison to other weapons, but they were incredibly effective, especially in combat situations outside the battlefield. The crossguard allowed for effective blocking of almost any kind of attack (well, maybe not an overhead strike of a Mordaxt, but still), the pommel was also used as a powerful “blunt” weapon of its own that could crack skulls. Though they were somewhat less effective against armored opponents, the long, two-handed hilt allowed for precise thrusts at uncovered body parts that made up for it.

6.)  “Zweihänder” were only used for very specific combat situations

Zweihänder—massive two-handed swords—were only used for specific purposes and usually not in one-on-one combat as is often seen in movies or games. One of these purposes was using their reach to break up enemy formations. In fact, one type of two-handed sword even owed its name to that purpose: Gassenhauer (German, Gasse = alley, Hauer = striker)—the fighters literally used it to strike “alleys” into an enemy formation with wide, powerful swings.

7.) It’s all about distance

While I was subconsciously aware of this, it might be helpful to remember that distance was an incredibly important element in fights. The moment your opponent got past your weapons ideal range, it was common to either switch to a different weapon or just drop your weapon and resort to punching/choking. A good example of this are spears or polearms—very powerful as long as you maintain a certain range between you and your opponent, but the moment they get too close, your weapon is practically useless. That’s also why combatants almost always brought a second weapon into battle to fall back one.

8.) Real fights rarely lasted over a minute

Another truism, but still useful to remember: real fights didn’t last long. Usually, they were over within less than a minute, sometimes only seconds – the moment your opponent landed a hit (or your weapon broke or you were disarmed), you were done for. This is especially true for combatants wearing no or only light armor.

9.) Stop the pirouettes

Unfortunately, the spinning around and pirouetting that makes many fight scenes so enjoyable to watch (or read) is completely asinine. Unless it’s a showfight, fighters would never expose their backs to their opponent or even turn their weapon away from them.

10.)  It still looks amazing

If your concern is that making your fight scenes realistic will make them less aesthetic, don’t worry. Apart from the fact that the blocks, swings and thrusts still look impressive when executed correctly, I personally felt that my fights get a lot more gripping and visceral if I respect the rules. To a certain extent, unrealistic and flashy combat is plot armor. If your characters can spin and somersault to their heart’s content and no one ever shoves a spear into their backs as they would have in real life, who survives and who doesn’t noticeably becomes arbitrary. If, on the other hand, even one slip-up can result in a combatant’s death, the stakes become palpable.

That’s about it! I hope this post is as helpful to some of you as the lessons were to me. Again, if anything I wrote here is bollocks, it’s probably my fault and not Jeanne’s.  I’ll try to post more stuff like this in the future.

Cheers,

Nicolas

[arrestjellyfish]

I'm volunteering for a literary journal right now and there's two things I think you all should know.

1. Most people that submit to literary journals are cis white men. We know this because our journal has an anonymous survey about demographics for people that submit.

2. Most things that get submitted to the creative non fiction section are on the level of middle school "What I did over the summer" essays.

I cannot see the demographics of the people whose essays I'm reading, but guys, if you are wondering if you should submit your work to a literary journal or not, I promise you that just in terms of statistics there are a lot of mediocre cis white men and people in general confidently submitting weird crap that isn't literature to literature magazines. Do it. Submit your work. Please. If you want there to be more diversity in literature, be the diversity. Do it. Do it do it do it.

[arrestjellyfish]

How to Get Out of A Writing Slump

Feeling a writing slump approaching you and your story? Get ready for some tips by guest writer Aamna to help get you focused and ready to continue your writing goals.

So writing slumps. Wow! Isn’t that a big can of worms? This little curse can descend upon a writer, no matter a beginner or published when they least expect it. And for several reasons. The most common instance can be when you are right in the middle of a story or a first draft. So here are some methods that I have come across in my writing journey, and have seen work really well for either myself or others.  

1) Take a break from your current project. Let your subconscious do the processing.

Sometimes you’re just not feeling your current project. How do get your heart back into it again? Drop it and do something else. What I would recommend doing in this situation is, write a short story. Or a poem. Or fanfic. It doesn’t have to be related to your WIP. It will get your conscious mind out of a rut, but it’ll still be processing in the back of your brain, and later when you come to your novel, Voila! You have a fresh set of eyes and renewed vigor for your story. 

2) There’s a reason NaNoWriMo has pep talks.

By far, the thing that has worked for me the most is listening to other writers speak. Even if it is just a writing buddy and not a published author, there is something truly magical about listening to a storyteller gush about their story with the passion of a hero ready to save the world. The incessant urge to create something just as beautiful or being on that high of imagination that washes over me as I listen to them has worked for me several times when I feel myself falling into a slump.

Go through the NaNoWriMo pep talks, listen to author interviews or podcasts, or find a writing buddy. Remind yourself how fun it is to write. 

3) Go back to the synopsis of your story to see what made you excited to write that in the first place. Rejuvenate the love! 

I have personally seen that doing this little can trick can give you that dose of motivation you need to get back into a story. It takes you back to that place when you loved that idea and gets you excited to work on it again. 

My ideas come to me in the form of something like a Goodreads synopsis, so whenever I want to get back to working on it again after a break (maybe because of upcoming exams or tests), I have seen that going through the “hook”, helps to re-ignite that love and excitement about the idea. 

4) Make a mood board or playlist for your characters or setting.

A writing slump may not necessarily be a complete turn-off from working on a story. It can also be that you are just in a position that you are not able to get the words out, but that doesn’t mean the only way to effectively work is ‘words.’

Creating aesthetics and playlists can be a very fun, entertaining exercise to do, and make the writing process seem less like a chore. 

5) Allow yourself the break. Don’t push yourself back into writing full-length novels or projects. 

Every time you take a break from writing does not have to be called a writing slump. Sometimes it’s way better to take a mental health break, or just put a pause for no other reason that you don’t want to, and you’d rather work on something else. 

You should know when to shelve a story or let a project go. It’s completely okay to stop in the middle of a WIP and delve into a new idea instead of forcing yourself to brainstorm and drag yourself through a story that you are not interested in anymore. A lot of the time that’s exactly what pushes you into a slump in the first place. 

6) Remove the pressure. Don’t let perfectionism hold you back.

Editing as you write is not the most advisable course of action, especially when you’re a new writer. And fretting about things like sentence structure, word choice, or minute grammar errors shouldn’t be the focus while you’re writing. The first draft of anything is a mess. This is when you should turn off your inner editor, and let your perfectionist inner-self take a back seat. Little things like these, even though you may not realize it, do a lot to demotivate you and take the away joy of writing because you feel that nothing you write is ever good enough. Don’t compare yourself to published authors. Their books have gone through developmental edits, copy edits, beta readers, and whatnot. 

Constantly expecting and beating yourself up for not being as good as someone else can push you into a slump faster than a boring story. 

Aamna (she/her) is a young devourer of books, stories, and any other form of words you can give her. More often than not, you can find her either reading, daydreaming about her seemingly never-ending WIP, or working on her blog. She likes to say that words are her superpower, and has a weird obsession with Marvel, ice cream, really bad art journaling, and Scrabble. She lives in India and is currently working on a Turkish-inspired fantasy novel. You can also follow her on IG.

Top Photo by Ryan Snaadt on Unsplash