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I have a type. My type is very specific.
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Just a little early season spencer dump 🤗
taglist- @spencers1wifey | @mvndfvelds | @mindfullycriminal | @luce-reid I @ferrjulie | @khxna | @ilovebeingdelulu | @lover-of-books-and-tea I@jaden-reid | @eli-chris | @multifandomsimp69 | @multiversejumper | @shadoesx
taglist/masterlist
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stalker- s.reid
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a/n: i imagined a fem reader but as per usual, imagine what you like :)
summary: spencer saves you.
pairing: spencer reid x reader
warnings: general criminal minds topics, gore and brief descriptions of harm, mutual pining, heavy topics, stalking, reader if from Texas
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Spencer sat at his desk, a less than pleasant expression on his face. His glasses had slid down his nose, his usually perfectly gelled hair was messy, and a frown played at his lips. 
“If you stare any longer you’re going to end up with your face stuck like that,” Jj joked as she placed herself in his eyeline. Spencer’s frown deepened and Jj chuckled. “Come on, we have a case.”
Spencer got up, falling into stride with you as you left your desk, hanging up the phone.
“Who were you talking to?” He asked, trying to make small talk. You were new to the team, an old contractor Strauss had hand-picked, you were smart (smarter than him), beautiful, and you were so polite and dutiful that Spencer couldn’t tell if you were actually his friend. You just had an air of coolness that seemed so unreachable for Spencer. You and Derek had worked together in Chicago, you two made sense as friends, Penelope, Emily, Jj, and you all got along well, that made sense. David and you had a shared love of cooking, something SPencer couldn’t even begin to understand. You even made Aaron laugh on the worst of days with some witty comment or sarcastic joke. 
Had Derek just asked you to befriend Spencer for the team's sake? Why would you be interested in him? It made no sense.
You smiled. “My friend from home.”
“Where are you from?” He asked as you two sat in the conference room, Aaron shot you two a look that Spencer clearly didn’t see so you didn’t answer. 
“Tell you later,” you whispered as the briefing began. 
—----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Walking into the sweltering heat of Texas from the lovely air-conditioned plane was quite the shock to the body. 
“Fuck it’s hot,” you sighed, pulling off your hoodie to reveal a tight black top beneath. Yes, it was work-appropriate and completely within regulations, but Spencer’s eyes all but popped out of his head like he was in one of those cartoons. 
“You’re drooling,” Derek joked from beside him, pretending to wipe his chin. Spencer pushed his hands away with a shy smile, trying to recover from his embarrassing moment. 
“Ok, Spencer and Derek you two go to the latest crime scene, Y/n, Jj and I will go to the precinct, David and Emily you two will go talk to the deceased family,” Aaron gave out jobs. “Oh and Y/n, I want you with someone at all times, this unSub is going after women with your exact description and our team is a definite hit for him. He’s made contact with the police asking specifically for you and me,” Aaron explained. 
You all dispersed into your separate cars and began working the case. The precinct was full of slimy cops who all promised to ‘protect you’, just not from themselves.
“We want you to wear this,” Jj handed you a bulletproof vest and you rolled your eyes. 
“Seriously? I’m not a porcelain doll, I can handle myself-” You tried to reason with them but the look on Aaron’s face made you stop. He, himself, was wearing one too. “Fine.”
“Good,” Jj smiled. 
—----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Spencer was worrying himself sick at the crime scene, rambling about all the ways the unSub could get to you and how you shouldn’t even be in the state.
“Spencer!” Derek exclaimed. “Go to your girlfriend, send Jj back after you. You’re no help when you’re like this.”
Spencer didn’t need to be told twice. He grabbed the keys and drove down to the precinct, finding Jj immediately and making up a poorly executed lie about feeling sick. She saw right through him.
“Hope you feel better Spence,” she smirked. “Y/n is with Hotch interviewing a suspect here,” she pointed it out on a map. “See you later.”
After grabbing the keys to Emily and David’s vehicle (they’d just come back from the crime scene) and driving there, anxiety ran through him as he found the door to the farmhouse open. He turned the corner, finding three figures. One was on the floor, shouting in agony, the other was standing, hands above their head. The third was holding a gun.
He turned back, dialling Derek’s number. 
“We need back-up, we’re at 34 Terrace Avenue! Agent down!” He spoke quietly into his phone. 
“We’re on the way kid, don’t go in without back-up,” Derek told him. Spencer didn’t respond. “Spencer?”
“She’s dying,” he reasoned and hung up, walking in. “FBI! Put your weapons down!” 
The unSub, Mitchell O’Hara had been obsessed with you since high school, you’d rejected him in senior year when he’d asked you to the prom since you already had plans with friends. All over the farmhouse, there were photos of you from every stage of your life. Childhood to teenage years, to college years, to your various positions before joining the BAU just a few months ago, including your CIA and covert Ops positions. 
Spencer could see you on the ground, multiple knife wounds in your exposed torso, he’d made you take off your vest, Spencer thought. You groaned in pain on the floor. “Spencer?” You asked hazily. Spencer kept his gun trained on Mitchell. 
“Yeah?” He was stalling, waiting for Aaron to get his own gun or for back-up to arrive. 
“Good,” you were slipping out of consciousness. “I’ve always liked you,” you smiled hazily. Spencer would be elated at those words if the circumstances were different. 
“This is your dream guy Y/n?!” Mitchell shouted. “Him?!” 
“He’s nice,” you managed. “He’s funny.”
“I’m nice! I’m funny!” Mitchell screamed. 
“You’re not Spencer,” you mumbled as everything went dark. 
SWAT suddenly filled the room and Spencer ran to you, trying to stop the bleeding. Thank god Derek had ordered for an ambulance to follow them to the scene.
As Aaron cuffed Mitchell, Spencer went with you in the ambulance. He watched as they attempted to treat your wounds, needing to cut open your shirt. Spencer was shocked to find what looked like 50 different scars. Some from bullets, others knives, others things he couldn’t name. He knew you’d been in the CIA and on a Cover Ops team, he never thought you would’ve been hurt this many times and still have the strength to go on. The ambulance pulled up to the hospital and you were brought straight into emergency surgery. 
He waited for hours there just pacing, nervously biting at his nails, or attempting to sit there as no one told him a thing. He lied, saying he was your boyfriend. Technically it wasn’t a lie, you liked him, he liked you. He just hadn’t asked. 
“Dr. Reid?” A nurse called out. He stood immediately. “She’s stable and should be waking up soon, you can see her.”
Spencer nodded a ‘thanks’ her way and entered your hospital room. 
You were alive. You were here. You were awake. 
You smiled at him. “Hey.”
Your voice was hoarse, tired from the shouting you’d done. 
“Hi.”
“Thanks for saving me Spencer,” you smiled. “And about what I said… if you don’t feel the same I’d totally get it. I just thought I was… y’know dying so…”
Spencer shook his head and smiled. “I like you a lot too.”
You grinned. “Good.”
He leaned down, a sudden surge of confidence ran through him and he kissed you softly.
“I’m from Texas by the way,” you smiled against his lips. 
“I actually guessed that, yeah,” he joked, making you laugh. God, he loved your laugh. 
He loved you. He just wouldn’t tell you that yet.
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criminal minds masterlist :)
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this picture is so funny to me it looks like a family on a roadtrip. aaron and elle are the exhausted parents, reid is the annoying backseat driver, and garcia is the ipad kid
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you know how to ball, i know aristotle
s.r x f!reader
summary: spencer's love feels so high school
warnings: none!
wc: 689 (she's short!)
a/n: inspired by so high school!! i have 50 different fics planned after listening to ttpd.......be prepared
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It felt childish in a way. The way Spencer feels his cheeks flush and a chill run down his body whenever she’s near him. The constant butterflies. The shyness he feels when she's around. The high he gets from being near her. It feels like he’s a teenager in love.
Right now, the feeling remains as he watches Y/N and the rest of the team that fills the bullpen play a makeshift game of basketball with a trash bin and crumpled up paper. Whenever she makes a basket, she snaps her head over to him to see if he was looking– of course he was– and his chest fills with pride. Once her turn was over though, his head went right back down to his current read, something about Greek philosophers.
“Pretty Boy!”
His head immediately went back up at the sound of Morgan calling out to him. “Hmm?”
“We need reinforcements. Your girl is kicking our asses over here.”
A red wave flooded his neck, making its way up to his face, and he moved his chair back the tiniest bit, giving a small nod as he tried to hide his shy smile. He felt the way one would if they were asked to play kiss, marry, kill with their crush’s name thrown in there. Honestly, he’d be content if she did all three to him.
From there on, the game went terribly. While Y/N was making shot after shot, Emily was barely making it around the rim, Derek made it every other time, and Spencer was so far off it was pointless in asking him to join (but he knew the ball wasn't weighted properly, and he’d die on that hill). It didn't take long for those who were losing to become uninterested in the game, so everything eventually went back to business.
That was until Spencer felt a pair of hands gently knead into his shoulders.
Normally, he would tense up immediately. He wouldn't want to be touched– he’d be questioning why someone was touching him. But he knew it was Y/N. He’s become accustomed to her delicate touch; the smell of her lotion; the light reflecting off of the promise ring he bought her for their last anniversary. She would massage his shoulders until he was completely relaxed against her, allowing her to lean forward more and wrap her arms around his neck, placing her chin on his shoulder.
“I had a lot of fun earlier. You did well.”
He let out a giddy laugh as he craned his neck in order to look at her. The same giddy feeling a teenager gets when playing spin the bottle and truth or dare spread through his body whenever he’s this close to her, it truly never fails.
“I’m glad. I absolutely embarrassed myself with my lack of skill, but I’m glad at least someone enjoyed it.”
“Hey,” she shifted slightly so that she was directly looking at him all while keeping her chin perched on him. “You didn't embarrass yourself. We all have things we’re good at. Like, look at this.” She lazily gestured to the books scattered across his desk, “I couldn't even begin to describe what you're reading. You’re brilliant, Spence.”
“It’s called The Philosophy of Aristotle. It’s a selection of Aristotle’s works and–” he stopped himself, watching the way Y/N was completely mesmerized by what he had to say.
“Keep going. I've done my reports and I’m sure you've finished yours. We have plenty of time.” She kissed his cheek as a way to get him to start speaking again, and he felt on top of the world.
It was childish, really. The constant buzz he felt when speaking to her. The crinkles he can feel by his eyes from smiling so hard. The childlike wonder at how someone could be so perfect for him. No one’s ever had him like her. He felt as though this is what he would've felt if he had a normal childhood, one where he had a high school sweetheart. And despite it feeling so high school, he loves it. He loves her.
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Double-Booked for the Night
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Summary: Reader and Spencer have been double-booked by JJ for a night of babysitting. What happens when the situation brings out some buried feelings from both parties?
Prompt: JJ accidentally double booked a babysitter for Henry. You both end up staying, and after watching the kids all night, he can't help but want you.
Couple: Spencer Reid/Fem!Reader
Category: Smut/Fluff
Content Warning: Spencer POV, coworkers to lovers, oral sex (f receiving), dirty talk, he picks her up, heavy making-out, unprotected sex, shades of breeding
Word Count: 7.7k
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In my time at the BAU, I had grown accustomed to the many changes it had brought to my life. I’d been made part of a world where long hours, serial killers, and few hours of sleep were the standard, and despite what anyone had to say about it, I had yet to truly hate my job. There were times where I couldn’t fathom that this was my life, that I was being made to peer into the minds of prolific serial killers at any given day, and expected to come out fine after, but for every negative this job brought, there was always one overwhelming positive. 
My team.
 If you got me tipsy enough, though, I’d probably end up babbling about the girl I’d come to know in the years I’d been here. (Y/N). 
If you got me a little drunker, I’d probably end up whining about how in the aforementioned years I’d been here, we’d never made a move on each other, despite the obvious chemistry. Part of me just wanted to mitigate the tension that had been building for ages, pull her into some darkened hallway and  kiss her senseless. Unfortunately, I was aware of the consequences that would come from acting so rashly, and so for both our sakes, I held back.  
Thankfully, there were a thousand things to distract me from my crush on the agent, and one of those things was JJ’s adorable son. Apart from being his godfather, my known lack of  a relationship among the team caused me to become the resident babysitter for the Jareau-LaMontagne household.
 It was always wonderful to lend a helping hand to one of my closest friends at the BAU, and let her and her husband get out of the house once in a while, but it was even more of an added bonus that Henry was absolutely adorable, and had honestly stolen my heart. I’d make my way to JJ and Will’s house, opening the door to be greeted by the blonde boy, who was always equally as excited to see me. I’d grown fond of him, and genuinely looked forward to whatever time we’d end up spending together. 
Which is why, when I’d come around to JJ’s house on a Friday night at her request, it was a little staggering to not see a head of blonde hair running to cling to my legs, but rather the coworker that had been plaguing my thoughts everyday for nearly three years at that point. It took me a second to focus on the actual situation at hand, as I was momentarily stunned into silence over how she appeared before me. She looked so casual, her hair loosely strung about, with a big hoodie and yoga pants enveloping her figure. She looked cozy, and warm- a noticeable change from the professional work attire I’d become accustomed to seeing her in. It was nice. And it briefly stopped my brain for a second.  It took me about five seconds before I remembered where I was, meeting her confused expression with mine. 
“(Y/N)?” I started. “What are you doing here?” I watched her keep the door open, whilst I raised my own eyebrow. 
“Babysitting for Henry, what are you..?” She replied, knitting her brows a bit. 
“Babysitting for Henry.” I responded, a little incredulously. 
“But JJ asked me..?” She started, when I interrupted her.  
 “Will asked me.” I said, and she nodded knowingly, realizing what had happened. 
“They double booked us.” She said, with a chuckle. 
God, she was so beautiful when she laughed like that.  
“Yeah, they did, didn’t they?” I say, rubbing the back of my neck, a little self consciously with a stupid smile plastered on my face. 
I couldn’t help but watch the little crinkle that formed at the sides of her eyes as she smiled affectionately at my remark. She had this way of making my insides turn to goo with a simple look, and at this moment, that was exactly how I was feeling. The way my body reacted to her came about naturally, and it was almost impossible to keep under wraps, even in moments like this. She gave me an adorable grin, laughing with me about the absurdity of the situation. 
“I guess I’ll..  go then.” I say with a chuckle, looking down at her. “JJ and Will only need one babysitter, and you’re already here..” I reason, gesturing to her standing at the door. 
“Yeah, I.. suppose you’re right.” She says, giving me another one of her small smiles. 
“I’ll see you at work then?” I say, a little awkwardly. Her hands twitched as they approached the doorknob, and I could feel it again. The absolute strain that seemed to reside between us. The manner in which her gaze connected with mine.  The way she seemed to linger a little too close to me instead of the handle of the door. It was so obvious we were denying what we wanted from each other, and it felt so ridiculous. I could feel myself letting out a breath, stepping away before I did anything stupid, until I heard a barreling of little steps hurtling towards me. 
“Uncle Spencer!” Henry cried, pushing past (Y/N), who nearly toppled over as the boy sprang at my legs. I steadied myself by grabbing onto the frame on the door, my smile returning as I reached down to hug him. 
“Hey! Henry.” I say, ruffling the boy’s hair affectionately and bending down to meet his eye-level. “How are you doing?” 
“Auntie (Y/N) was about to put on a movie for us.” Henry says, smiling brightly and already attempting to tug me into the house. “Come watch!” 
“Aww, Henry.” I say, giving him a little frown. “I can’t, I’m sorry though.” I say, gently. “You should watch with Auntie (Y/N) though!” I say, smiling and looking up at her from my place on the floor. My gaze softened a bit as I noticed the unmistakable trace of blush on her cheeks, but my attention was quickly turned back to Henry, feeling another tug from him.  
“You don’t wanna watch with us?” He says, with the biggest puppy-dog eyes I’d ever seen. 
“Henry..” I start with an apologetic tone, about to explain that I really couldn’t impose, even if deep down,  I secretly wanted to, if not to spend time with him, but her. 
“You can stay, you know?” She interjects from above us, and I look up at her, displaying my confused smile. 
“Really?” I say, raising my eyebrows at her, as I stood back up to face her.  “You’d be okay with that?” I say, still keeping my eyes locked on hers. 
“I mean, I don’t think I’d not take up the offer of more help with him.” She says, chuckling a bit as she crossed her arms and leaned up against the door frame.
I looked at Henry once more, grinning. I asked him, “Would you be okay with that, buddy?” 
Henry nodded excitedly, already pulling me into the house with his little hands. “Auntie (Y/N) put on a movie for me.”  He continued adorably, a bounce in his step as he guided me to the couch. 
I smiled at Henry as he led me to the living room, some children’s movie I didn’t recognize playing on the screen. I could hear (Y/N) following us after closing the front door and as I sat down, she smiled at me again. 
“It’s actually kind of a miracle you showed up when you did.” She says to me, a light giggle escaping from her lips. “I had no idea how I was going to get dinner out  and watch him at the same time.” She explained, as Henry made his way next to me, getting comfortable. 
“Ah, you know.” I say, shrugging and laughing nonchalantly, opening my arms to allow Henry to lean against me. “Always happy to help. Especially if it involves this little guy.” I ruffled his hair and heard a little chuckle against me from the boy, as I kept my eyes on her, flashing her a soft smile.
Henry grinned at that, as he excitedly started talking about the movie that was playing, wildly gesticulating as he attempted to explain what I’d missed since I’d entered the room. I nodded, but out of the corner of my eye I saw (Y/N) enter the kitchen, presumably to prepare Henry’s dinner. I heard and saw her rustling about the kitchen in small flashes, and a small smile graced my face at the sight of her. It was silly, but I rarely got to see this side of her. She looked so calm and laid-back, and it was a welcomed change, one that brought a certain warmth to my chest just from the look of it. 
I watched her for a few more moments, before turning my full attention back to Henry. I listened to him, nodding like I totally understood everything he was saying, even if he was talking fifty words a minute and stumbling over his speech every step of the way. Regardless, I loved him. Loved spending time with him, and that was only made better when I saw (Y/N) approach us in the living room, plopping down next to Henry with a plate of lasagna. 
“Okay, I know Mommy doesn’t usually let you eat in front of the TV.. so this’ll be our secret, okay?” She said, a playful glint in her eye as she carefully handed the plate to Henry. “But you gotta promise me one thing.” 
Henry nodded excitedly. She spoke with mock seriousness to him, pursing her lips and nodding. “You gotta promise me you’re gonna finish everything off your plate, alright?” It wasn’t even a question, as Henry nodded, happily agreeing with her, and digging into the food she’d brought. She sat back, looking satisfied with herself.  I couldn’t help but smile to myself at the sight. She was always kind at work, and it wasn’t surprising that she was good with kids, but I never expected her to be this good. She fit into the role naturally, and it sent a feeling of endearment through me as I watched her speak to Henry. 
Henry ate quietly between the two of us as I watched the TV, but in actuality my mind was completely focused on her. The softness in her actions towards Henry, the tenderness in her eyes as she dealt with him. It was truly having an effect on me, and in a moment of weakness I allowed myself to get wrapped up in a fantasy involving her, me and a child of our own. It was insane! I’d never even kissed the girl before, but watching her like this made me desperately long for a situation in which we had a family together, a concept I had been yearning for privately, only exacerbated by the wonderful woman in front of me. 
It seemed I’d gotten a little too lost in my thoughts, because I felt Henry tugging at my shoulder, and I blinked, realizing he’d been trying to get my attention for a few seconds now.  “Uncle Spencer!” He whined, and I looked at him with a stir. 
“Ah, sorry Henry! Got really into the movie.” I say, feeling my cheeks heat up a bit as I ran my hands through my hair. “What’s up?” 
“Can you help me wash my hands?” He asked, in his little voice, and I laughed a little, nodding. 
(Y/N) took his plate from him, smiling at me and mouthing a ‘thanks’, which I returned with a smile of my own and thumbs-up, as I took Henry to the bathroom. I led him there, opening the door and watching from the door frame as he stood on the kiddie-stool, washing his hands for the full, recommended twenty seconds. I’d taught him well. When he finished, he wiped his hands on the hand towel and leapt off the stool, running past me. I rolled my eyes fondly, because as usual, Henry had left the bathroom light and door open. I closed both for him, walking to catch up with him, and before I’d even entered the living room, Henry was sitting on the couch, already back to watching the movie that played in front of him. 
I came near him, ruffling his hair. “You all good there, bud?” I asked, and Henry nodded absentmindedly, clearly focused on the TV instead of my words, and I chuckled affectionately at his total and complete disinterest in me, now that he could watch TV uninterrupted. 
“You okay if I go help out Auntie (Y/N) in the kitchen real quick? I’ll be right here.” I said, reassuringly, but Henry wasn’t even paying attention, so I smiled and walked towards the kitchen, beckoned by the sight of (Y/N) washing Henry’s dinner dish, her sleeves rolled up and her previously open hair now pinned back. 
I approached her and leaned against the counter, smiling a little dumbly as I watched her, until she looked up at me, sending me a confused grin. “What are you smiling about, Reid?” She asked, a playful lilt in her voice as she continued scrubbing away at the dishes. 
“Ah, nothing.” I responded, but she looked up, rolling her eyes with amusement. 
“You know we’re both profilers, right?” She shot back, raising an eyebrow and smirking at me. “I can tell when you’re not exactly being truthful.” She paused, before taking a second to properly look at me. “Come on, spit it out.” 
I took a breath, shrugging and turning my body to face her as she kept her gaze trained on me. “It’s really nothing, I just.. I guess I’m surprised by how good you are with kids.” I say, not trying to let on how much tonight had actually affected me in regards to my feelings about her. 
She raised her eyebrows, letting a giggle fall from her lips. “What, you think I’d suck with them or something?” She said, biting her lip a bit and I felt my heart turn a bit at that. Even though I was aware she was joking, I felt the overwhelming need to comfort her, to make my intentions more than clear. 
“No, no, (Y/N).” I say, shaking my head and chuckling. “I just meant- you’re so thoughtful at work, of course you’d be good with kids. It’s a no-brainer. But I don’t know, seeing it in front of me was just..” I took a breath, smiling. “This may be totally weird to say, but you’d make a great mom.” 
I watched her reaction, fearing I’d maybe crossed a line by saying so, but she smiled shyly, purposely keeping her eyes off me as she asked, “Yeah? You think so?” 
I kept my eyes on her, adoringly observing her as I nodded. “Yeah, no. I know so.” 
I watched her bite her lip as she kept her view away from mine, and even in the dim lighting of the kitchen, I saw a light blush fill her cheeks. She looked up at me, an innocently amused look on her face. 
“Thank you, Spencer. That means a lot.” She responds, starting to dry her hands with a dish towel off the side of the sink. As she reached forward, she shifted herself a bit closer to me and I watched as she rubbed off the water droplets on her skin with the fabric. I could physically hear her swallowing as our proximity to each other was brought closer, and I couldn’t help but watch her lips, slightly red and swollen from biting on them all night. It was a habit of hers I’d noticed since we began working, and tonight, it was driving me fucking crazy. I wondered what it’d feel like to have her lips against mine, to run my tongue over the plumpness of them. I imagined pinning her against the counter right here, kissing her until we both forgot our names and lost our breath in each other. I shakily exhaled at the thought, and at that moment, she looked up at me, and seemingly caught me in the act of staring, except she didn’t move away. We exchanged glances for a beat, and I was beginning to contemplate leaning in, repercussions be damned, but in a twisted turn of fate, we heard a little voice calling out to us in the other room. 
“Auntie (Y/N)! Uncle Spencer! The movie’s over!” He called out, starting to run into the kitchen with the remote. (Y/N) laughed nervously, moving away from me to pick up Henry in her arms. I stepped away just as fast,  going back to leaning on the counter as I watched her cradle the boy in her arms, and I could physically recognize the feeling of affection filling my body as my eyes were fixed on her. If she noticed, she pretended not to, turning her entire focus on the boy. 
“You know what that means, right, Henry?” (Y/N) asked, cooing a bit at the boy. “It’s time for bed, alright? Let’s get you upstairs.” 
“Can Uncle Spencer come too?” Henry asked, looking at me. The boy was clearly a little more tired now that it was later in the night, but he was quite clear in his demands. Henry then looked at (Y/N), his eyes big and wide. “Did you know Uncle Spencer can read me a whole story without the book?”
(Y/N) only laughed at that, looking between me and the boy. “Can he now? I guess he’s just going to have to join us for bedtime, right?” She looks at me, raising an eyebrow and I nod, beaming a little coyly. 
“Eidetic memory, remember?” I say, smirking at her. 
She makes an amused sound at that, nodding knowingly. “How could I forget?”
 She sighs softly, still supporting Henry in her arms. “Okay, let’s get you to sleep, bud.” She says, kissing the top of his head,, beginning to walk towards the stairs, looking back at me and motioning for me to follow. 
I smiled at the gesture, and again, I could sense my heart yearning for a future in which this was our life. It was ridiculous, and yet as the night progressed, my imagination only continued to go wild with the possibilities of a reality where we were each other’s. I continued to walk with her, until we reached Henry’s room, which she slowly turned the knob to. She walked in, keeping the door open for me as I trailed behind her, closing the door. She laid Henry down in the bed, looking at me. 
She ran her hands down her thighs, beaming gently at me through the low light of Henry’s bedroom. “I’ll.. um. I’ll leave you here with him?” She asked, keeping her voice low. I felt a moment of disappointment flash through me, secretly wishing she’d stay, for us to spend more time in this bubble we’d created for ourselves tonight. I know I wasn’t crazy, I know that she had to feel it too. But, at the risk of seeming clingy, I nodded, permitting her to leave the room. But a little voice protested, sitting straight up in his bed and tugging at her hand back to him. 
“No, no!” Henry whined. “I want Auntie (Y/N) and Uncle Spencer here.” 
I could hear her pause, before looking at me with a subtle, surrendering expression in her eyes. “Okay, okay, Henry.” She says, sitting down in his bed next to him.
 She smoothed over his hair, and Henry looked at me expectantly. I exchanged a quick, covert look with her, implicitly making sure she was okay with all this, and she nodded, even repositioning herself to allow me more space on the other side of Henry. I slid in, moving around until I found a more comfortable position. The three of us attempting to squish into the same, child-sized bed resulted in a slightly tight fit, but it was cozy, nonetheless. (Y/N) had adjusted to be slightly leaned on her side, her hands now lazily playing with Henry’s hair, brushing the hair away from his face. I observed her affectionately, sensing a familiar warmth suffuse me yet again, as I beheld the domesticity in front of me. She made eye contact with me, still keeping her fingers running through the strands of the boy’s hair, smirking softly at me. 
“You know.. I think someone promised us a bedtime story.” She murmured quietly, a touch of whimsy in her voice. 
I chuckled softly at that, breathing out a little harder out of my nose. “Okay, yeah. Right.” I took a breath, and tried to recall something to recite off the top of my head. I decided on a classic, Alice in Wonderland as I felt its longevity would allow Henry ample time to fall asleep. She seemed pleased with this too, relaxing into her position on her other side of Henry, watching me as I began. I started to speak, my tone low and soothing, and in about twenty or so minutes, I could hear the soft breathing of the boy slow down and I gazed upon him, but quickly realized that (Y/N)’s fingers had stilled in his hair too, and in a moment of realization, I became aware that not only was Henry asleep, but so was she. I allowed myself to stare at her sleeping figure, marveling at the way strands of her soft hair gently placed themselves around her face in a way that framed her delicate features perfectly. I swallowed, wishing more than anything that I could lean over, brush over the wisps and kiss her forehead, but I held back, opting to gently push her awake. 
“(Y/N).. hey.” I breathed out softly, keeping my voice to a low whisper so as to not wake Henry. “Come on, you don’t wanna fall asleep here.” I brought my hand to her shoulder, rubbing it softly to stir her awake and she did, blinking herself awake. She realized where she was and yawned, and let a soft giggle escape her lips. 
“Ah, I totally fell asleep, didn’t I?” She mused, keeping a hushed voice. 
“Yeah, you did.” I replied, watching as she woke up slowly, waiting for her to get up. 
“You’re good at that. Getting him to sleep, I mean.” She said in return, keeping her attention on me, never once diverting her eyes from mine. She paused, seeming to consider her next words carefully, before following with a gentle addition, “You’d make a great dad.” 
I tensed at the words, feeling my cheeks heat up from embarrassment and the sheer need to reach over and grab her by the shoulders, as if to alert her that, ‘Yes! I would! And I want that with you!’
Instead, I softly chuckled at her words, swallowing down my affection and nodding. “Yeah, I guess.”
She released a quiet breath, starting to move off the bed as slowly as she could. “We should get out of here. JJ and Will will be home soon, and we can go home.” She replied, in a faint voice. 
I nodded, already beginning to shuffle off the bed and joining her at the door. I watched her give Henry one last look, before opening the door. She held it ajar for me and I walked past her quietly, and as I did, she followed, closing the door with a gentle click, and releasing another exhale. 
“Thank god.” She said, smiling a little brighter now. We walked down the stairs, and she allowed her voice to raise as we got further and further away from Henry’s room. “It takes me forever to get him down. You’re like.. actual magic.” She continues, nudging my shoulder. 
I fidget with my fingers, feeling a little bashful. We approached the living room again, standing in the middle of the room as we continued talking. “Yeah, no. JJ and Will have been asking me to babysit since Henry was three. You learn a lot.” 
She gleamed at that, nodding. “Regardless of how you figured out how to do it, you were still a huge lifesaver tonight.” She remarked, adding to her statement in a soft voice. “Thanks.”
 Her eyes met with mine. I gave her a smile, making eye contact with her again. I’d always loved her eyes, they were always so big and expressive. They just contained so much emotion, and I’d grown to love watching her when she was happy, or excited, because those emotions were so clearly reflected on every part of her face. But right now, as I looked into her eyes, they expressed an emotion I’d become very accustomed to seeing tonight, and found myself precariously losing my will to deny.
Desire. 
And there it was again, that tenderness, that affection, and just the absolute craving to be with her, in every sense of the word. She bit her lip, and in an instant it was made clear to me that perhaps my sentiment to overlook the possible aftermath of giving into the desire that plagued us was shared, because she moved a little closer to me, her eyes moving from my eyes to my lips. I swallowed.
“Tonight was.. fun.” I murmur, eyeing her lips in a similar manner as she had.
She nodded, silent, before releasing a shaky exhale. “It was .. fun. Yeah.”  She responds, her voice barely above a whisper. 
We were barely speaking, and yet in that moment I felt entirely breathless in her presence. I wanted to say something, anything, but any thought of mine completely died, because as soon as I even attempted to open my mouth, she surged forward, planting her lips on mine. I was momentarily stunned. She kissed me once, then twice and then slowly pulled away.  I instantly missed the feeling and warmth of her mouth against mine, wanting nothing more than to pull her against me again. She, on the other hand, looked mortified, her lips parted and her complexion flushed.
“Oh god, Spencer.” She started, a little frantic. “I’m so sorry, I don’t know what came over me, and we can forget-” 
I finally gave into what I’d been yearning for the whole night, not even bothering to respond to her apologies as I pulled her back against me, bringing her face closer to mine in a heated, passionate kiss. I could feel her happily sigh into my mouth, and I took the opportunity to slip my tongue into her mouth, and she only responded more enthusiastically to that, her arms wrapping themselves around my neck. I took the opportunity to lean down, placing my hands on the back of her thighs, never once letting my lips leave hers. I heard her moan slightly into my mouth at that, and I couldn’t help the smirk that formed on my face. I’d wanted this for so long, and with the way she was reacting, I could tell the lust I felt was mirrored in her as well. 
I laid her on the couch, finally letting my lips leave hers to take a breath as I positioned myself above her and grinning wildly, She looked equally as excited, already trying to pull me back against her. 
“You have.. no idea.. how bad I’ve wanted this.” She murmured, in between breaths, attempting to kiss me yet again. 
Before I kissed her, I leaned down, letting my lips brush over the shell of her ear, lowly whispering, “I think I have a clue.”
 I heard another soft moan coming from her at my words, and I felt a wave of pride knowing I’d done that to her. She was the one under me, moaning for me like that, and it only spurred me on further. I promptly moved myself closer to kiss her again, letting both of my hands rest on either side of my face as I hovered above her, fully losing myself in the action. We continued at this, feeling our hunger for more grow. I began to let my hand trail down to her hips, slowly bringing my hand under her hoodie, feeling a shudder as my hand met her warm skin. It took nearly everything to not rip it off her, but in an unanticipated shift in circumstances, we heard the telltale noise of the front door knob moving from its locked position, signifying that JJ and Will had gotten home.
I lept off her, her body imitating my movements, instantly moving away from mine and I almost immediately yearned for her touch again, but I understood the dire situation we’d found ourselves in. She brushed over her hair, attempting to make herself look as normal as she possibly could. I took in her state, hair in disarray, her skin reddened and her lips swollen. I had a sneaking feeling that I most likely mirrored her disheveledness, and took a breath, silently begging that JJ and Will wouldn’t notice, and even if they did, they didn’t comment on it. We heard the footsteps of them approaching the living room, and (Y/N) stood up to greet them. 
“JJ, Will.” She said, smiling. “Henry’s all asleep and put down.” 
JJ smiled at her, hugging her gently. “Oh, thank you so much. Was he good?” She asked, laughing a bit. 
“An angel.” (Y/N) responded, smiling. 
As JJ’s eyes met mine, she raised an eyebrow. “Spencer, what are you doing here?” She asked, with a confused look, before Will spoke up behind us.
“I thought (Y/N) couldn’t babysit.. I called Spencer.” Will said, a little sheepishly. 
JJ looked at him, her jaw dropping a bit. “No, remember? I told you, (Y/N) wasn’t but then she could.” 
The two of them laughed a little apologetically as they realized their miscommunication, turning to face me and (Y/N). 
“We’re so sorry guys. We didn’t even realize..” JJ started, but (Y/N) interrupted her. 
“No, no. It’s okay! Spencer was a huge help.” She says, smiling at me. 
“Yeah.” I responded, nodding and affirming her statement in an attempt to alleviate any guilt JJ or Will might’ve felt about the situation (not trying to reveal how secretly pleased I was with it). “(Y/N) made the time go by faster than usual. Don’t even worry about it.” 
JJ sighed, smiling and nodding. “Thank you. It was nice to get out of the house tonight.”
“It was  no problem.” (Y/N) responds. I can tell she’s trying to play it cool, to end off the interaction before JJ looked at the two of us for a little too long and realized what had conspired in her and Will’s absence. “So.. uh. It’s late.” (Y/N) breathes out. “And I love your kid, JJ, but I’m ready for some well deserved sleep.” She said, with a little smile. 
JJ nodded, knowing the feeling all too well. “Yeah, get out of here.” She said, playfully waving a hand at (Y/N), then me. “You too, Spencer. I’m sure you’re tired too, even if you’re too polite to say so.” 
I rubbed my neck with my hand, chuckling softly. “Yeah, yeah.” I replied, trying to fake tiredness to match JJ’s expectations of what I’d be like after a night of watching her kid. However, I was probably the furthest thing from tired. My mind was racing with the possibilities of what had just occurred with (Y/N) just now, and how badly I wanted to do more. The sheer desperation I felt for her was absolutely ruining me, and honestly, I had very little willpower stopping me from just taking her hand and dragging her out of the house, and kissing her right outside on the porch. Thankfully, before that could happen, (Y/N) started walking towards the door and I followed behind her, attempting to look as normal as I could. 
“Goodnight!” She called out, opening the door. 
“Get home safe!” JJ responded, watching as we both left and closing the door behind us. I took a breath, turning towards her and exhaling. The night air was a lot colder than the warmth of the house, but even then I could feel how hot my body was becoming, absolutely begging for her once again.
“So..” I started. 
“So..” She responded, and then suddenly spoke up. “Do you need a ride home?” 
I blinked in response, understanding the implicit request in her words and biting my lip at it. “Yeah, I do.” I responded. 
“Great.” She responds with purpose, grabbing my hand with a need I’d never seen from her before. It thrilled the hell out of me to know she was just as eager as me, and longed for me with the same fervor. Her gaze was intense as she led me to her car, and in a split second, I decided I couldn’t wait an entire car ride to taste her again. I quickly pinned her against the war, and I could feel her let out a noise of surprise before I dove in for another kiss, taking delight in the way she pressed against me instantly, giving into the kiss. She demonstrated her enthusiasm, nearly moaning into my mouth and I laughed, shushing her in between kisses. 
“(Y/N)!” I said, whisper-yelling. “We’re right outside JJ and Will’s house. Someone’s gonna hear us.” 
She pulled back, breathing heavily and looking at me with a glint in her eye. “Well, will you hurry up then and just take me back to your place?” She retorted, playfully, diving in for one last kiss. 
I nodded. “Gladly.” I took the car keys from her, grinning wildly. 
“Hey! It’s my car!” She said, trying to grab the keys back, a hint of amusement in her tone. 
“I know a faster way back to my place. Wouldn’t you rather get there, than argue over who drives?” I say, feeling a surge of confidence as I cockily raised an eyebrow at her. 
She rolled her eyes, but I could sense the fondness in the expression as she basically ran to the passenger side, opening the door. “Drive fast. Please.” The desperation in her tone heightened my arousal and I wondered if it’d be possible to just give up and have sex in the backseat of her car, but I quickly let go of the thought. I’d wanted this for so long, and when I fucked her tonight, I was going to take my time. I was going to savor her, worship her for everything she was. 
It took ten, painstakingly long minutes for us to reach my apartment, and less than three to stumble to my apartment, all over each other like a pair of horny teenagers. It was like we were magnets, unable to get away from each other for even a second without thinking we couldn’t live without the other. I responded passionately to each and every one of her advances against me, kissing her fervently against the wall, up the stairs, before finally leading her to my bedroom. We fell into my bed in a tangle of limbs, and I breathed heavily over her. Ultimately, we found ourselves once again in the same position we’d been in on JJ and Will’s couch, with me on top of her. I looked down at her, finally taking a break from kissing her to cradle her face with my palm, still holding myself above her body. 
“Did you mean it?” She asked, softly, biting her lip. 
“What do you mean?” I respond, starting to move my lips gently down her neck, testing out different points of sensitivity. I wanted to kiss every inch of her bare skin, to feel her in every way. I could feel her body squirm and tense as I let my lips linger on a particular spot between her ear and neck, beginning to lightly suck there until I heard a quiet moan coming out from the girl in front of me. 
“The thing about me being a good mom.” She spoke, in between moans and happy sighs. “Or was that like, flirting? For sex?” 
I suddenly retracted my position from her neck, making her whine a bit but I quickly placed a hand under her chin, forcing her to look at me. 
“(Y/N), I cannot express how devastatingly real my feelings are for you. You’re- you’re perfect. And I wish I’d said it a long time before tonight, if I knew we could’ve done this much earlier.” I looked deep into her eyes, hoping my words and the intensity of my gaze could properly convey just how sincere I was about this, about her. 
Her lips parted, and she let out a soft exhale, and then allowed the corners of her mouth to turn upwards in a smile. I smiled down at her, once again recapturing her lips in a kiss, almost as if to seal the deal between us. She reciprocated, before pulling back. “I meant it.” She admitted softly. “I’ve always thought you’d be a good dad.” 
I could feel myself blushing at that, moving in for another kiss. I was enthralled by her, addicted to her taste and the way her lips moved over mine. I felt like I could do forever, but a slight mewl alerted me that she wanted a bit more than that.
“Spence, kissing is really, really nice. But if you don’t fuck-” 
I quickly understood, beginning to kiss the expanse down her neck, already moving my hands under her hoodie and grabbing at her breast, squeezing the soft and supple skin through her bra, eliciting the sweetest sounds from her that only served to embolden me. I slowly moved to remove the pieces of fabric between us, and as soon as she registered the shuffling of her hoodie, she eagerly reached out to begin undoing the buttons of my own shirt. She paused, letting me pull off the hoodie and I leaned back, admiring her, all laid out like this for me. I ran a finger against her jawline, and watched her shudder at the intimacy of the action. 
“You’re so beautiful.” I whisper, physically unable to take my eyes off her. I could tell it was affecting her, as she looked shy under my gaze, a light tinge of pink now dusting her cheeks as I spoke the words. 
“Thank you.” She says, in a similar tone to mine. She leans up to kiss me again, and her fingers are working my buttons. I let her, shrugging the shirt off and pressing my bare chest against her. She was just so soft, and warm, and I truly couldn’t get enough of her. I moved down, kissing the swell of her breasts and moving my fingers back to unclasp her bra, slipping it off her and immediately attaching my mouth to her nipples, moving my hand to rub at the other one. I watched her mouth drop open, her face contorting with pleasure, moaning out my name. I continued my ministrations for a moment, before beginning to kiss down her stomach. I could feel the tensing of the muscles, her happy sighs and light moans indicating to me I was doing a good job at pleasing her, and at that moment, it’s all I wanted. 
I began to slip down her sweatpants, reveling in the way she lifted up her hips, kicking off the clothing. I kissed near the hem of her underwear, teasing her by lightly tracing my finger near where a wet patch had formed against them. 
“You were so good today, you know that?” I murmur, letting my breath hit her clothed core. I pressed a chaste kiss against it. “So fucking good.” 
I hear a desperate moan from her, her hips jolting against my face, begging me for more. I nod, using my fingers to slide down the fabric, watching in fascination as her glistening folds were revealed to me, and in an almost primal way, I let my tongue dart out, licking a fat stripe against her. She immediately shuddered, nearly closing her thighs around me from the intense euphoria she was experiencing. I hooked my hands underneath them, holding her open and tasting the hot flesh against my tongue, enjoying the way she tasted against me. I had never felt such a burning need for anyone in my entire life, and I’m sure she could tell by the way, given the way I was absolutely devouring into her, my tongue continuing to move against her like a man starved, lapping up whatever I could. I wanted it all. I began to feel her thighs shake uncontrollably against me, and her moans reverberating around the room as her volume got louder. 
“Please-please! Spencer. Holy fuck. Please don’t stop, please don’t-” 
I let my tongue dart harshly against her clit, and her begging fell into a string of incoherent whimpers and praises for my mouth, making me chuckle slightly. It seemed to do her in, the vibration of my mouth causing her moans reaching a peak they hadn’t this entire night, and a tension leaving her body as she looked down at me with glazed eyes, breathing heavily. I drank her arousal, feeling the entirety of her arousal coating my lower chin. She moaned at the overstimulation, but I could only focus on how fucking good she tasted. 
I moved up against her, giving her another kiss, before I felt her moving, tugging me off her. 
“Something wrong?” I asked, knitting my brows and biting my lip. 
“I need you inside me. Now. Please.” She said, the intensity of her desperation going straight to my cock as I nodded quickly. 
“Okay, yeah.” I replied, quickly beginning to undo my own pants and pulling my cock out of the confines of my briefs. I gave it a few strong tugs, before moving above her again, rubbing the head of my arousal against her folds. She moaned at the feeling, before it died out into a silent scream as I moved inside of her with no warning. She screwed her eyes shut, before moaning out, “Fuck. You feel so good.” 
That was all the incentive I needed, beginning to buck wildly against her watching as we both lost ourselves in the pleasure we were giving to the other. As she whimpered, I moaned out at the feeling of how well she was taking me. I leaned down, whispering into her ear. “You’re so good.” I moaned, feeling a particularly strong clench against my cock. “I want you so badly. I wanna make you mine.” I groaned, barely getting the words out as she tensed against me, clearly nearing her second release of the night. 
I could feel the twitch of my member inside of her, feeling the arousal fill up in the pit of my belly, my breathing getting heavier and faster as we both reached our peaks. 
“Take me.” She moaned, desperate and needy. “I’m yours. Make me yours.” She said, nearly screaming out the words. 
My hips snapped harder against her, a primal growl coming out of me as I heard the words. “Is that right? You wanna be filled? You want my cum inside you, then?” 
“Yes, yes! Spencer, please- please! I need it!” At her last beg, I groaned, feeling myself expel inside of her, feeling myself come inside of her. A few moments later, her walls spasmed against me, soft whimpers and moans leaving her lips as she convulsed against my cock. I thrust lazily, working both of us through our orgasms, before gently rolling off her, and kissing her forehead, then her cheek.
“You’re so amazing.” I whisper to her, as she gives me a dazed smile, clearly fucked out but elated. A thin sheen of sweat covered her, and it only served to make her look even more radiant in the light of my bedroom. 
“You too, doc.” She said, a teasing quality in her voice, as she shifted herself closer to me. I opened my arms up to her, letting her lay her head on my chest, and I could feel her breathing relax and slow down as she settled against me, closing her eyes. 
“Goodnight.” I murmur, kissing the top of her head one final time. I began to close my eyes, ready to fall asleep like this, before I heard her voice again, soft and light. 
“Spence?” She mumbled, half-asleep as her lips brushed the bare skin of my chest. 
“Mm?” 
“I really like you.” 
I laughed at that, feeling a bloom of absolute adoration fill my chest. “I really like you too.” I sighed, closing my eyes once more. “Sleep.” 
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The next morning, I woke up to the sound of my phone ringing, groaning as I realized it was JJ. (Y/N) was still asleep in my arms, and I shifted our positions slightly, careful not to wake her. I answered the phone in a low tone. “JJ? What’s up?” 
JJ’s voice came frantic from the other line. “Spencer?! Spencer. Oh my god. Did (Y/N) get home last night? I’m here at her apartment, and I don’t see her car in the parking space and-” 
I internally groaned, realizing I was going to need to explain her whereabouts without revealing what we had done. “Erm. JJ. Don’t worry.” I responded, trying to seem nonchalant, keeping my voice down. “I’m sure she’s fine.” 
“Don’t worry?! Spencer, where the fuck is she?! Did you see her go home or-” 
I interrupted her, sighing discerning that JJ wasn't going to take a vague answer right now. “She’s with me, okay! It’s okay. She’s with me.” 
There was a beat, and then I heard the smile in her voice. “She’s with you?” 
I rubbed my forehead, letting out a low groan. “She is.” 
JJ’s voice, now growing excited erupted in a fit of giggles and laughs. “Oh god, I owe Will twenty bucks now. I knew it would happen eventually, but I never assumed all it would take would be one night spent together!” 
It was my turn to be confused, knitting my brows. “Sorry, what?” 
JJ responded simply, her coyness over the phone giving away everything. “Let’s just say we knew we were double-booking last night.” 
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hello again! thank you so much for reading. as usual, likes, reblogs, feedback are all appreciated. i cannot say thank you enough. <3 p.s . thanks for everyone's help on the poll!! i hope this satisfied everyone's want for a long smut fic, haha:3
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Double-Booked for the Night
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Summary: Reader and Spencer have been double-booked by JJ for a night of babysitting. What happens when the situation brings out some buried feelings from both parties?
Prompt: JJ accidentally double booked a babysitter for Henry. You both end up staying, and after watching the kids all night, he can't help but want you.
Couple: Spencer Reid/Fem!Reader
Category: Smut/Fluff
Content Warning: Spencer POV, coworkers to lovers, oral sex (f receiving), dirty talk, he picks her up, heavy making-out, unprotected sex, shades of breeding
Word Count: 7.7k
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In my time at the BAU, I had grown accustomed to the many changes it had brought to my life. I’d been made part of a world where long hours, serial killers, and few hours of sleep were the standard, and despite what anyone had to say about it, I had yet to truly hate my job. There were times where I couldn’t fathom that this was my life, that I was being made to peer into the minds of prolific serial killers at any given day, and expected to come out fine after, but for every negative this job brought, there was always one overwhelming positive. 
My team.
 If you got me tipsy enough, though, I’d probably end up babbling about the girl I’d come to know in the years I’d been here. (Y/N). 
If you got me a little drunker, I’d probably end up whining about how in the aforementioned years I’d been here, we’d never made a move on each other, despite the obvious chemistry. Part of me just wanted to mitigate the tension that had been building for ages, pull her into some darkened hallway and  kiss her senseless. Unfortunately, I was aware of the consequences that would come from acting so rashly, and so for both our sakes, I held back.  
Thankfully, there were a thousand things to distract me from my crush on the agent, and one of those things was JJ’s adorable son. Apart from being his godfather, my known lack of  a relationship among the team caused me to become the resident babysitter for the Jareau-LaMontagne household.
 It was always wonderful to lend a helping hand to one of my closest friends at the BAU, and let her and her husband get out of the house once in a while, but it was even more of an added bonus that Henry was absolutely adorable, and had honestly stolen my heart. I’d make my way to JJ and Will’s house, opening the door to be greeted by the blonde boy, who was always equally as excited to see me. I’d grown fond of him, and genuinely looked forward to whatever time we’d end up spending together. 
Which is why, when I’d come around to JJ’s house on a Friday night at her request, it was a little staggering to not see a head of blonde hair running to cling to my legs, but rather the coworker that had been plaguing my thoughts everyday for nearly three years at that point. It took me a second to focus on the actual situation at hand, as I was momentarily stunned into silence over how she appeared before me. She looked so casual, her hair loosely strung about, with a big hoodie and yoga pants enveloping her figure. She looked cozy, and warm- a noticeable change from the professional work attire I’d become accustomed to seeing her in. It was nice. And it briefly stopped my brain for a second.  It took me about five seconds before I remembered where I was, meeting her confused expression with mine. 
“(Y/N)?” I started. “What are you doing here?” I watched her keep the door open, whilst I raised my own eyebrow. 
“Babysitting for Henry, what are you..?” She replied, knitting her brows a bit. 
“Babysitting for Henry.” I responded, a little incredulously. 
“But JJ asked me..?” She started, when I interrupted her.  
 “Will asked me.” I said, and she nodded knowingly, realizing what had happened. 
“They double booked us.” She said, with a chuckle. 
God, she was so beautiful when she laughed like that.  
“Yeah, they did, didn’t they?” I say, rubbing the back of my neck, a little self consciously with a stupid smile plastered on my face. 
I couldn’t help but watch the little crinkle that formed at the sides of her eyes as she smiled affectionately at my remark. She had this way of making my insides turn to goo with a simple look, and at this moment, that was exactly how I was feeling. The way my body reacted to her came about naturally, and it was almost impossible to keep under wraps, even in moments like this. She gave me an adorable grin, laughing with me about the absurdity of the situation. 
“I guess I’ll..  go then.” I say with a chuckle, looking down at her. “JJ and Will only need one babysitter, and you’re already here..” I reason, gesturing to her standing at the door. 
“Yeah, I.. suppose you’re right.” She says, giving me another one of her small smiles. 
“I’ll see you at work then?” I say, a little awkwardly. Her hands twitched as they approached the doorknob, and I could feel it again. The absolute strain that seemed to reside between us. The manner in which her gaze connected with mine.  The way she seemed to linger a little too close to me instead of the handle of the door. It was so obvious we were denying what we wanted from each other, and it felt so ridiculous. I could feel myself letting out a breath, stepping away before I did anything stupid, until I heard a barreling of little steps hurtling towards me. 
“Uncle Spencer!” Henry cried, pushing past (Y/N), who nearly toppled over as the boy sprang at my legs. I steadied myself by grabbing onto the frame on the door, my smile returning as I reached down to hug him. 
“Hey! Henry.” I say, ruffling the boy’s hair affectionately and bending down to meet his eye-level. “How are you doing?” 
“Auntie (Y/N) was about to put on a movie for us.” Henry says, smiling brightly and already attempting to tug me into the house. “Come watch!” 
“Aww, Henry.” I say, giving him a little frown. “I can’t, I’m sorry though.” I say, gently. “You should watch with Auntie (Y/N) though!” I say, smiling and looking up at her from my place on the floor. My gaze softened a bit as I noticed the unmistakable trace of blush on her cheeks, but my attention was quickly turned back to Henry, feeling another tug from him.  
“You don’t wanna watch with us?” He says, with the biggest puppy-dog eyes I’d ever seen. 
“Henry..” I start with an apologetic tone, about to explain that I really couldn’t impose, even if deep down,  I secretly wanted to, if not to spend time with him, but her. 
“You can stay, you know?” She interjects from above us, and I look up at her, displaying my confused smile. 
“Really?” I say, raising my eyebrows at her, as I stood back up to face her.  “You’d be okay with that?” I say, still keeping my eyes locked on hers. 
“I mean, I don’t think I’d not take up the offer of more help with him.” She says, chuckling a bit as she crossed her arms and leaned up against the door frame.
I looked at Henry once more, grinning. I asked him, “Would you be okay with that, buddy?” 
Henry nodded excitedly, already pulling me into the house with his little hands. “Auntie (Y/N) put on a movie for me.”  He continued adorably, a bounce in his step as he guided me to the couch. 
I smiled at Henry as he led me to the living room, some children’s movie I didn’t recognize playing on the screen. I could hear (Y/N) following us after closing the front door and as I sat down, she smiled at me again. 
“It’s actually kind of a miracle you showed up when you did.” She says to me, a light giggle escaping from her lips. “I had no idea how I was going to get dinner out  and watch him at the same time.” She explained, as Henry made his way next to me, getting comfortable. 
“Ah, you know.” I say, shrugging and laughing nonchalantly, opening my arms to allow Henry to lean against me. “Always happy to help. Especially if it involves this little guy.” I ruffled his hair and heard a little chuckle against me from the boy, as I kept my eyes on her, flashing her a soft smile.
Henry grinned at that, as he excitedly started talking about the movie that was playing, wildly gesticulating as he attempted to explain what I’d missed since I’d entered the room. I nodded, but out of the corner of my eye I saw (Y/N) enter the kitchen, presumably to prepare Henry’s dinner. I heard and saw her rustling about the kitchen in small flashes, and a small smile graced my face at the sight of her. It was silly, but I rarely got to see this side of her. She looked so calm and laid-back, and it was a welcomed change, one that brought a certain warmth to my chest just from the look of it. 
I watched her for a few more moments, before turning my full attention back to Henry. I listened to him, nodding like I totally understood everything he was saying, even if he was talking fifty words a minute and stumbling over his speech every step of the way. Regardless, I loved him. Loved spending time with him, and that was only made better when I saw (Y/N) approach us in the living room, plopping down next to Henry with a plate of lasagna. 
“Okay, I know Mommy doesn’t usually let you eat in front of the TV.. so this’ll be our secret, okay?” She said, a playful glint in her eye as she carefully handed the plate to Henry. “But you gotta promise me one thing.” 
Henry nodded excitedly. She spoke with mock seriousness to him, pursing her lips and nodding. “You gotta promise me you’re gonna finish everything off your plate, alright?” It wasn’t even a question, as Henry nodded, happily agreeing with her, and digging into the food she’d brought. She sat back, looking satisfied with herself.  I couldn’t help but smile to myself at the sight. She was always kind at work, and it wasn’t surprising that she was good with kids, but I never expected her to be this good. She fit into the role naturally, and it sent a feeling of endearment through me as I watched her speak to Henry. 
Henry ate quietly between the two of us as I watched the TV, but in actuality my mind was completely focused on her. The softness in her actions towards Henry, the tenderness in her eyes as she dealt with him. It was truly having an effect on me, and in a moment of weakness I allowed myself to get wrapped up in a fantasy involving her, me and a child of our own. It was insane! I’d never even kissed the girl before, but watching her like this made me desperately long for a situation in which we had a family together, a concept I had been yearning for privately, only exacerbated by the wonderful woman in front of me. 
It seemed I’d gotten a little too lost in my thoughts, because I felt Henry tugging at my shoulder, and I blinked, realizing he’d been trying to get my attention for a few seconds now.  “Uncle Spencer!” He whined, and I looked at him with a stir. 
“Ah, sorry Henry! Got really into the movie.” I say, feeling my cheeks heat up a bit as I ran my hands through my hair. “What’s up?” 
“Can you help me wash my hands?” He asked, in his little voice, and I laughed a little, nodding. 
(Y/N) took his plate from him, smiling at me and mouthing a ‘thanks’, which I returned with a smile of my own and thumbs-up, as I took Henry to the bathroom. I led him there, opening the door and watching from the door frame as he stood on the kiddie-stool, washing his hands for the full, recommended twenty seconds. I’d taught him well. When he finished, he wiped his hands on the hand towel and leapt off the stool, running past me. I rolled my eyes fondly, because as usual, Henry had left the bathroom light and door open. I closed both for him, walking to catch up with him, and before I’d even entered the living room, Henry was sitting on the couch, already back to watching the movie that played in front of him. 
I came near him, ruffling his hair. “You all good there, bud?” I asked, and Henry nodded absentmindedly, clearly focused on the TV instead of my words, and I chuckled affectionately at his total and complete disinterest in me, now that he could watch TV uninterrupted. 
“You okay if I go help out Auntie (Y/N) in the kitchen real quick? I’ll be right here.” I said, reassuringly, but Henry wasn’t even paying attention, so I smiled and walked towards the kitchen, beckoned by the sight of (Y/N) washing Henry’s dinner dish, her sleeves rolled up and her previously open hair now pinned back. 
I approached her and leaned against the counter, smiling a little dumbly as I watched her, until she looked up at me, sending me a confused grin. “What are you smiling about, Reid?” She asked, a playful lilt in her voice as she continued scrubbing away at the dishes. 
“Ah, nothing.” I responded, but she looked up, rolling her eyes with amusement. 
“You know we’re both profilers, right?” She shot back, raising an eyebrow and smirking at me. “I can tell when you’re not exactly being truthful.” She paused, before taking a second to properly look at me. “Come on, spit it out.” 
I took a breath, shrugging and turning my body to face her as she kept her gaze trained on me. “It’s really nothing, I just.. I guess I’m surprised by how good you are with kids.” I say, not trying to let on how much tonight had actually affected me in regards to my feelings about her. 
She raised her eyebrows, letting a giggle fall from her lips. “What, you think I’d suck with them or something?” She said, biting her lip a bit and I felt my heart turn a bit at that. Even though I was aware she was joking, I felt the overwhelming need to comfort her, to make my intentions more than clear. 
“No, no, (Y/N).” I say, shaking my head and chuckling. “I just meant- you’re so thoughtful at work, of course you’d be good with kids. It’s a no-brainer. But I don’t know, seeing it in front of me was just..” I took a breath, smiling. “This may be totally weird to say, but you’d make a great mom.” 
I watched her reaction, fearing I’d maybe crossed a line by saying so, but she smiled shyly, purposely keeping her eyes off me as she asked, “Yeah? You think so?” 
I kept my eyes on her, adoringly observing her as I nodded. “Yeah, no. I know so.” 
I watched her bite her lip as she kept her view away from mine, and even in the dim lighting of the kitchen, I saw a light blush fill her cheeks. She looked up at me, an innocently amused look on her face. 
“Thank you, Spencer. That means a lot.” She responds, starting to dry her hands with a dish towel off the side of the sink. As she reached forward, she shifted herself a bit closer to me and I watched as she rubbed off the water droplets on her skin with the fabric. I could physically hear her swallowing as our proximity to each other was brought closer, and I couldn’t help but watch her lips, slightly red and swollen from biting on them all night. It was a habit of hers I’d noticed since we began working, and tonight, it was driving me fucking crazy. I wondered what it’d feel like to have her lips against mine, to run my tongue over the plumpness of them. I imagined pinning her against the counter right here, kissing her until we both forgot our names and lost our breath in each other. I shakily exhaled at the thought, and at that moment, she looked up at me, and seemingly caught me in the act of staring, except she didn’t move away. We exchanged glances for a beat, and I was beginning to contemplate leaning in, repercussions be damned, but in a twisted turn of fate, we heard a little voice calling out to us in the other room. 
“Auntie (Y/N)! Uncle Spencer! The movie’s over!” He called out, starting to run into the kitchen with the remote. (Y/N) laughed nervously, moving away from me to pick up Henry in her arms. I stepped away just as fast,  going back to leaning on the counter as I watched her cradle the boy in her arms, and I could physically recognize the feeling of affection filling my body as my eyes were fixed on her. If she noticed, she pretended not to, turning her entire focus on the boy. 
“You know what that means, right, Henry?” (Y/N) asked, cooing a bit at the boy. “It’s time for bed, alright? Let’s get you upstairs.” 
“Can Uncle Spencer come too?” Henry asked, looking at me. The boy was clearly a little more tired now that it was later in the night, but he was quite clear in his demands. Henry then looked at (Y/N), his eyes big and wide. “Did you know Uncle Spencer can read me a whole story without the book?”
(Y/N) only laughed at that, looking between me and the boy. “Can he now? I guess he’s just going to have to join us for bedtime, right?” She looks at me, raising an eyebrow and I nod, beaming a little coyly. 
“Eidetic memory, remember?” I say, smirking at her. 
She makes an amused sound at that, nodding knowingly. “How could I forget?”
 She sighs softly, still supporting Henry in her arms. “Okay, let’s get you to sleep, bud.” She says, kissing the top of his head,, beginning to walk towards the stairs, looking back at me and motioning for me to follow. 
I smiled at the gesture, and again, I could sense my heart yearning for a future in which this was our life. It was ridiculous, and yet as the night progressed, my imagination only continued to go wild with the possibilities of a reality where we were each other’s. I continued to walk with her, until we reached Henry’s room, which she slowly turned the knob to. She walked in, keeping the door open for me as I trailed behind her, closing the door. She laid Henry down in the bed, looking at me. 
She ran her hands down her thighs, beaming gently at me through the low light of Henry’s bedroom. “I’ll.. um. I’ll leave you here with him?” She asked, keeping her voice low. I felt a moment of disappointment flash through me, secretly wishing she’d stay, for us to spend more time in this bubble we’d created for ourselves tonight. I know I wasn’t crazy, I know that she had to feel it too. But, at the risk of seeming clingy, I nodded, permitting her to leave the room. But a little voice protested, sitting straight up in his bed and tugging at her hand back to him. 
“No, no!” Henry whined. “I want Auntie (Y/N) and Uncle Spencer here.” 
I could hear her pause, before looking at me with a subtle, surrendering expression in her eyes. “Okay, okay, Henry.” She says, sitting down in his bed next to him.
 She smoothed over his hair, and Henry looked at me expectantly. I exchanged a quick, covert look with her, implicitly making sure she was okay with all this, and she nodded, even repositioning herself to allow me more space on the other side of Henry. I slid in, moving around until I found a more comfortable position. The three of us attempting to squish into the same, child-sized bed resulted in a slightly tight fit, but it was cozy, nonetheless. (Y/N) had adjusted to be slightly leaned on her side, her hands now lazily playing with Henry’s hair, brushing the hair away from his face. I observed her affectionately, sensing a familiar warmth suffuse me yet again, as I beheld the domesticity in front of me. She made eye contact with me, still keeping her fingers running through the strands of the boy’s hair, smirking softly at me. 
“You know.. I think someone promised us a bedtime story.” She murmured quietly, a touch of whimsy in her voice. 
I chuckled softly at that, breathing out a little harder out of my nose. “Okay, yeah. Right.” I took a breath, and tried to recall something to recite off the top of my head. I decided on a classic, Alice in Wonderland as I felt its longevity would allow Henry ample time to fall asleep. She seemed pleased with this too, relaxing into her position on her other side of Henry, watching me as I began. I started to speak, my tone low and soothing, and in about twenty or so minutes, I could hear the soft breathing of the boy slow down and I gazed upon him, but quickly realized that (Y/N)’s fingers had stilled in his hair too, and in a moment of realization, I became aware that not only was Henry asleep, but so was she. I allowed myself to stare at her sleeping figure, marveling at the way strands of her soft hair gently placed themselves around her face in a way that framed her delicate features perfectly. I swallowed, wishing more than anything that I could lean over, brush over the wisps and kiss her forehead, but I held back, opting to gently push her awake. 
“(Y/N).. hey.” I breathed out softly, keeping my voice to a low whisper so as to not wake Henry. “Come on, you don’t wanna fall asleep here.” I brought my hand to her shoulder, rubbing it softly to stir her awake and she did, blinking herself awake. She realized where she was and yawned, and let a soft giggle escape her lips. 
“Ah, I totally fell asleep, didn’t I?” She mused, keeping a hushed voice. 
“Yeah, you did.” I replied, watching as she woke up slowly, waiting for her to get up. 
“You’re good at that. Getting him to sleep, I mean.” She said in return, keeping her attention on me, never once diverting her eyes from mine. She paused, seeming to consider her next words carefully, before following with a gentle addition, “You’d make a great dad.” 
I tensed at the words, feeling my cheeks heat up from embarrassment and the sheer need to reach over and grab her by the shoulders, as if to alert her that, ‘Yes! I would! And I want that with you!’
Instead, I softly chuckled at her words, swallowing down my affection and nodding. “Yeah, I guess.”
She released a quiet breath, starting to move off the bed as slowly as she could. “We should get out of here. JJ and Will will be home soon, and we can go home.” She replied, in a faint voice. 
I nodded, already beginning to shuffle off the bed and joining her at the door. I watched her give Henry one last look, before opening the door. She held it ajar for me and I walked past her quietly, and as I did, she followed, closing the door with a gentle click, and releasing another exhale. 
“Thank god.” She said, smiling a little brighter now. We walked down the stairs, and she allowed her voice to raise as we got further and further away from Henry’s room. “It takes me forever to get him down. You’re like.. actual magic.” She continues, nudging my shoulder. 
I fidget with my fingers, feeling a little bashful. We approached the living room again, standing in the middle of the room as we continued talking. “Yeah, no. JJ and Will have been asking me to babysit since Henry was three. You learn a lot.” 
She gleamed at that, nodding. “Regardless of how you figured out how to do it, you were still a huge lifesaver tonight.” She remarked, adding to her statement in a soft voice. “Thanks.”
 Her eyes met with mine. I gave her a smile, making eye contact with her again. I’d always loved her eyes, they were always so big and expressive. They just contained so much emotion, and I’d grown to love watching her when she was happy, or excited, because those emotions were so clearly reflected on every part of her face. But right now, as I looked into her eyes, they expressed an emotion I’d become very accustomed to seeing tonight, and found myself precariously losing my will to deny.
Desire. 
And there it was again, that tenderness, that affection, and just the absolute craving to be with her, in every sense of the word. She bit her lip, and in an instant it was made clear to me that perhaps my sentiment to overlook the possible aftermath of giving into the desire that plagued us was shared, because she moved a little closer to me, her eyes moving from my eyes to my lips. I swallowed.
“Tonight was.. fun.” I murmur, eyeing her lips in a similar manner as she had.
She nodded, silent, before releasing a shaky exhale. “It was .. fun. Yeah.”  She responds, her voice barely above a whisper. 
We were barely speaking, and yet in that moment I felt entirely breathless in her presence. I wanted to say something, anything, but any thought of mine completely died, because as soon as I even attempted to open my mouth, she surged forward, planting her lips on mine. I was momentarily stunned. She kissed me once, then twice and then slowly pulled away.  I instantly missed the feeling and warmth of her mouth against mine, wanting nothing more than to pull her against me again. She, on the other hand, looked mortified, her lips parted and her complexion flushed.
“Oh god, Spencer.” She started, a little frantic. “I’m so sorry, I don’t know what came over me, and we can forget-” 
I finally gave into what I’d been yearning for the whole night, not even bothering to respond to her apologies as I pulled her back against me, bringing her face closer to mine in a heated, passionate kiss. I could feel her happily sigh into my mouth, and I took the opportunity to slip my tongue into her mouth, and she only responded more enthusiastically to that, her arms wrapping themselves around my neck. I took the opportunity to lean down, placing my hands on the back of her thighs, never once letting my lips leave hers. I heard her moan slightly into my mouth at that, and I couldn’t help the smirk that formed on my face. I’d wanted this for so long, and with the way she was reacting, I could tell the lust I felt was mirrored in her as well. 
I laid her on the couch, finally letting my lips leave hers to take a breath as I positioned myself above her and grinning wildly, She looked equally as excited, already trying to pull me back against her. 
“You have.. no idea.. how bad I’ve wanted this.” She murmured, in between breaths, attempting to kiss me yet again. 
Before I kissed her, I leaned down, letting my lips brush over the shell of her ear, lowly whispering, “I think I have a clue.”
 I heard another soft moan coming from her at my words, and I felt a wave of pride knowing I’d done that to her. She was the one under me, moaning for me like that, and it only spurred me on further. I promptly moved myself closer to kiss her again, letting both of my hands rest on either side of my face as I hovered above her, fully losing myself in the action. We continued at this, feeling our hunger for more grow. I began to let my hand trail down to her hips, slowly bringing my hand under her hoodie, feeling a shudder as my hand met her warm skin. It took nearly everything to not rip it off her, but in an unanticipated shift in circumstances, we heard the telltale noise of the front door knob moving from its locked position, signifying that JJ and Will had gotten home.
I lept off her, her body imitating my movements, instantly moving away from mine and I almost immediately yearned for her touch again, but I understood the dire situation we’d found ourselves in. She brushed over her hair, attempting to make herself look as normal as she possibly could. I took in her state, hair in disarray, her skin reddened and her lips swollen. I had a sneaking feeling that I most likely mirrored her disheveledness, and took a breath, silently begging that JJ and Will wouldn’t notice, and even if they did, they didn’t comment on it. We heard the footsteps of them approaching the living room, and (Y/N) stood up to greet them. 
“JJ, Will.” She said, smiling. “Henry’s all asleep and put down.” 
JJ smiled at her, hugging her gently. “Oh, thank you so much. Was he good?” She asked, laughing a bit. 
“An angel.” (Y/N) responded, smiling. 
As JJ’s eyes met mine, she raised an eyebrow. “Spencer, what are you doing here?” She asked, with a confused look, before Will spoke up behind us.
“I thought (Y/N) couldn’t babysit.. I called Spencer.” Will said, a little sheepishly. 
JJ looked at him, her jaw dropping a bit. “No, remember? I told you, (Y/N) wasn’t but then she could.” 
The two of them laughed a little apologetically as they realized their miscommunication, turning to face me and (Y/N). 
“We’re so sorry guys. We didn’t even realize..” JJ started, but (Y/N) interrupted her. 
“No, no. It’s okay! Spencer was a huge help.” She says, smiling at me. 
“Yeah.” I responded, nodding and affirming her statement in an attempt to alleviate any guilt JJ or Will might’ve felt about the situation (not trying to reveal how secretly pleased I was with it). “(Y/N) made the time go by faster than usual. Don’t even worry about it.” 
JJ sighed, smiling and nodding. “Thank you. It was nice to get out of the house tonight.”
“It was  no problem.” (Y/N) responds. I can tell she’s trying to play it cool, to end off the interaction before JJ looked at the two of us for a little too long and realized what had conspired in her and Will’s absence. “So.. uh. It’s late.” (Y/N) breathes out. “And I love your kid, JJ, but I’m ready for some well deserved sleep.” She said, with a little smile. 
JJ nodded, knowing the feeling all too well. “Yeah, get out of here.” She said, playfully waving a hand at (Y/N), then me. “You too, Spencer. I’m sure you’re tired too, even if you’re too polite to say so.” 
I rubbed my neck with my hand, chuckling softly. “Yeah, yeah.” I replied, trying to fake tiredness to match JJ’s expectations of what I’d be like after a night of watching her kid. However, I was probably the furthest thing from tired. My mind was racing with the possibilities of what had just occurred with (Y/N) just now, and how badly I wanted to do more. The sheer desperation I felt for her was absolutely ruining me, and honestly, I had very little willpower stopping me from just taking her hand and dragging her out of the house, and kissing her right outside on the porch. Thankfully, before that could happen, (Y/N) started walking towards the door and I followed behind her, attempting to look as normal as I could. 
“Goodnight!” She called out, opening the door. 
“Get home safe!” JJ responded, watching as we both left and closing the door behind us. I took a breath, turning towards her and exhaling. The night air was a lot colder than the warmth of the house, but even then I could feel how hot my body was becoming, absolutely begging for her once again.
“So..” I started. 
“So..” She responded, and then suddenly spoke up. “Do you need a ride home?” 
I blinked in response, understanding the implicit request in her words and biting my lip at it. “Yeah, I do.” I responded. 
“Great.” She responds with purpose, grabbing my hand with a need I’d never seen from her before. It thrilled the hell out of me to know she was just as eager as me, and longed for me with the same fervor. Her gaze was intense as she led me to her car, and in a split second, I decided I couldn’t wait an entire car ride to taste her again. I quickly pinned her against the war, and I could feel her let out a noise of surprise before I dove in for another kiss, taking delight in the way she pressed against me instantly, giving into the kiss. She demonstrated her enthusiasm, nearly moaning into my mouth and I laughed, shushing her in between kisses. 
“(Y/N)!” I said, whisper-yelling. “We’re right outside JJ and Will’s house. Someone’s gonna hear us.” 
She pulled back, breathing heavily and looking at me with a glint in her eye. “Well, will you hurry up then and just take me back to your place?” She retorted, playfully, diving in for one last kiss. 
I nodded. “Gladly.” I took the car keys from her, grinning wildly. 
“Hey! It’s my car!” She said, trying to grab the keys back, a hint of amusement in her tone. 
“I know a faster way back to my place. Wouldn’t you rather get there, than argue over who drives?” I say, feeling a surge of confidence as I cockily raised an eyebrow at her. 
She rolled her eyes, but I could sense the fondness in the expression as she basically ran to the passenger side, opening the door. “Drive fast. Please.” The desperation in her tone heightened my arousal and I wondered if it’d be possible to just give up and have sex in the backseat of her car, but I quickly let go of the thought. I’d wanted this for so long, and when I fucked her tonight, I was going to take my time. I was going to savor her, worship her for everything she was. 
It took ten, painstakingly long minutes for us to reach my apartment, and less than three to stumble to my apartment, all over each other like a pair of horny teenagers. It was like we were magnets, unable to get away from each other for even a second without thinking we couldn’t live without the other. I responded passionately to each and every one of her advances against me, kissing her fervently against the wall, up the stairs, before finally leading her to my bedroom. We fell into my bed in a tangle of limbs, and I breathed heavily over her. Ultimately, we found ourselves once again in the same position we’d been in on JJ and Will’s couch, with me on top of her. I looked down at her, finally taking a break from kissing her to cradle her face with my palm, still holding myself above her body. 
“Did you mean it?” She asked, softly, biting her lip. 
“What do you mean?” I respond, starting to move my lips gently down her neck, testing out different points of sensitivity. I wanted to kiss every inch of her bare skin, to feel her in every way. I could feel her body squirm and tense as I let my lips linger on a particular spot between her ear and neck, beginning to lightly suck there until I heard a quiet moan coming out from the girl in front of me. 
“The thing about me being a good mom.” She spoke, in between moans and happy sighs. “Or was that like, flirting? For sex?” 
I suddenly retracted my position from her neck, making her whine a bit but I quickly placed a hand under her chin, forcing her to look at me. 
“(Y/N), I cannot express how devastatingly real my feelings are for you. You’re- you’re perfect. And I wish I’d said it a long time before tonight, if I knew we could’ve done this much earlier.” I looked deep into her eyes, hoping my words and the intensity of my gaze could properly convey just how sincere I was about this, about her. 
Her lips parted, and she let out a soft exhale, and then allowed the corners of her mouth to turn upwards in a smile. I smiled down at her, once again recapturing her lips in a kiss, almost as if to seal the deal between us. She reciprocated, before pulling back. “I meant it.” She admitted softly. “I’ve always thought you’d be a good dad.” 
I could feel myself blushing at that, moving in for another kiss. I was enthralled by her, addicted to her taste and the way her lips moved over mine. I felt like I could do forever, but a slight mewl alerted me that she wanted a bit more than that.
“Spence, kissing is really, really nice. But if you don’t fuck-” 
I quickly understood, beginning to kiss the expanse down her neck, already moving my hands under her hoodie and grabbing at her breast, squeezing the soft and supple skin through her bra, eliciting the sweetest sounds from her that only served to embolden me. I slowly moved to remove the pieces of fabric between us, and as soon as she registered the shuffling of her hoodie, she eagerly reached out to begin undoing the buttons of my own shirt. She paused, letting me pull off the hoodie and I leaned back, admiring her, all laid out like this for me. I ran a finger against her jawline, and watched her shudder at the intimacy of the action. 
“You’re so beautiful.” I whisper, physically unable to take my eyes off her. I could tell it was affecting her, as she looked shy under my gaze, a light tinge of pink now dusting her cheeks as I spoke the words. 
“Thank you.” She says, in a similar tone to mine. She leans up to kiss me again, and her fingers are working my buttons. I let her, shrugging the shirt off and pressing my bare chest against her. She was just so soft, and warm, and I truly couldn’t get enough of her. I moved down, kissing the swell of her breasts and moving my fingers back to unclasp her bra, slipping it off her and immediately attaching my mouth to her nipples, moving my hand to rub at the other one. I watched her mouth drop open, her face contorting with pleasure, moaning out my name. I continued my ministrations for a moment, before beginning to kiss down her stomach. I could feel the tensing of the muscles, her happy sighs and light moans indicating to me I was doing a good job at pleasing her, and at that moment, it’s all I wanted. 
I began to slip down her sweatpants, reveling in the way she lifted up her hips, kicking off the clothing. I kissed near the hem of her underwear, teasing her by lightly tracing my finger near where a wet patch had formed against them. 
“You were so good today, you know that?” I murmur, letting my breath hit her clothed core. I pressed a chaste kiss against it. “So fucking good.” 
I hear a desperate moan from her, her hips jolting against my face, begging me for more. I nod, using my fingers to slide down the fabric, watching in fascination as her glistening folds were revealed to me, and in an almost primal way, I let my tongue dart out, licking a fat stripe against her. She immediately shuddered, nearly closing her thighs around me from the intense euphoria she was experiencing. I hooked my hands underneath them, holding her open and tasting the hot flesh against my tongue, enjoying the way she tasted against me. I had never felt such a burning need for anyone in my entire life, and I’m sure she could tell by the way, given the way I was absolutely devouring into her, my tongue continuing to move against her like a man starved, lapping up whatever I could. I wanted it all. I began to feel her thighs shake uncontrollably against me, and her moans reverberating around the room as her volume got louder. 
“Please-please! Spencer. Holy fuck. Please don’t stop, please don’t-” 
I let my tongue dart harshly against her clit, and her begging fell into a string of incoherent whimpers and praises for my mouth, making me chuckle slightly. It seemed to do her in, the vibration of my mouth causing her moans reaching a peak they hadn’t this entire night, and a tension leaving her body as she looked down at me with glazed eyes, breathing heavily. I drank her arousal, feeling the entirety of her arousal coating my lower chin. She moaned at the overstimulation, but I could only focus on how fucking good she tasted. 
I moved up against her, giving her another kiss, before I felt her moving, tugging me off her. 
“Something wrong?” I asked, knitting my brows and biting my lip. 
“I need you inside me. Now. Please.” She said, the intensity of her desperation going straight to my cock as I nodded quickly. 
“Okay, yeah.” I replied, quickly beginning to undo my own pants and pulling my cock out of the confines of my briefs. I gave it a few strong tugs, before moving above her again, rubbing the head of my arousal against her folds. She moaned at the feeling, before it died out into a silent scream as I moved inside of her with no warning. She screwed her eyes shut, before moaning out, “Fuck. You feel so good.” 
That was all the incentive I needed, beginning to buck wildly against her watching as we both lost ourselves in the pleasure we were giving to the other. As she whimpered, I moaned out at the feeling of how well she was taking me. I leaned down, whispering into her ear. “You’re so good.” I moaned, feeling a particularly strong clench against my cock. “I want you so badly. I wanna make you mine.” I groaned, barely getting the words out as she tensed against me, clearly nearing her second release of the night. 
I could feel the twitch of my member inside of her, feeling the arousal fill up in the pit of my belly, my breathing getting heavier and faster as we both reached our peaks. 
“Take me.” She moaned, desperate and needy. “I’m yours. Make me yours.” She said, nearly screaming out the words. 
My hips snapped harder against her, a primal growl coming out of me as I heard the words. “Is that right? You wanna be filled? You want my cum inside you, then?” 
“Yes, yes! Spencer, please- please! I need it!” At her last beg, I groaned, feeling myself expel inside of her, feeling myself come inside of her. A few moments later, her walls spasmed against me, soft whimpers and moans leaving her lips as she convulsed against my cock. I thrust lazily, working both of us through our orgasms, before gently rolling off her, and kissing her forehead, then her cheek.
“You’re so amazing.” I whisper to her, as she gives me a dazed smile, clearly fucked out but elated. A thin sheen of sweat covered her, and it only served to make her look even more radiant in the light of my bedroom. 
“You too, doc.” She said, a teasing quality in her voice, as she shifted herself closer to me. I opened my arms up to her, letting her lay her head on my chest, and I could feel her breathing relax and slow down as she settled against me, closing her eyes. 
“Goodnight.” I murmur, kissing the top of her head one final time. I began to close my eyes, ready to fall asleep like this, before I heard her voice again, soft and light. 
“Spence?” She mumbled, half-asleep as her lips brushed the bare skin of my chest. 
“Mm?” 
“I really like you.” 
I laughed at that, feeling a bloom of absolute adoration fill my chest. “I really like you too.” I sighed, closing my eyes once more. “Sleep.” 
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The next morning, I woke up to the sound of my phone ringing, groaning as I realized it was JJ. (Y/N) was still asleep in my arms, and I shifted our positions slightly, careful not to wake her. I answered the phone in a low tone. “JJ? What’s up?” 
JJ’s voice came frantic from the other line. “Spencer?! Spencer. Oh my god. Did (Y/N) get home last night? I’m here at her apartment, and I don’t see her car in the parking space and-” 
I internally groaned, realizing I was going to need to explain her whereabouts without revealing what we had done. “Erm. JJ. Don’t worry.” I responded, trying to seem nonchalant, keeping my voice down. “I’m sure she’s fine.” 
“Don’t worry?! Spencer, where the fuck is she?! Did you see her go home or-” 
I interrupted her, sighing discerning that JJ wasn't going to take a vague answer right now. “She’s with me, okay! It’s okay. She’s with me.” 
There was a beat, and then I heard the smile in her voice. “She’s with you?” 
I rubbed my forehead, letting out a low groan. “She is.” 
JJ’s voice, now growing excited erupted in a fit of giggles and laughs. “Oh god, I owe Will twenty bucks now. I knew it would happen eventually, but I never assumed all it would take would be one night spent together!” 
It was my turn to be confused, knitting my brows. “Sorry, what?” 
JJ responded simply, her coyness over the phone giving away everything. “Let’s just say we knew we were double-booking last night.” 
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hello again! thank you so much for reading. as usual, likes, reblogs, feedback are all appreciated. i cannot say thank you enough. <3 p.s . thanks for everyone's help on the poll!! i hope this satisfied everyone's want for a long smut fic, haha:3
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Not Technically Mine…But Still Unequivocally Mine
Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader (not AFAB specific)
WC: ~2.9k
Warnings: reader is undercover bait, very scummy suspect, very uncomfy situation and dialogue, touching, Spencer is concerned for her safety, biological male reaction mention, strangulation mention but not depicted, the b word is used to describe the reader, he spits on her too
Summary: (based off a post by @hereforhalstead and fic semi-requested by @ribbongrll) Reader has to go undercover as bait to lure in a suspect, and Spencer is not happy about it. He’s very protective and almost caused the mission to not be completed
Note: I envisioned post prison Spencer for this so it’s like S13-15 (JJ and Luke are in here), also third person and idk what’s happening with the tenses. Also a bit repetitive? Bit annoying?
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Spencer absolutely fucking hated it whenever he had to be in a club or a bar for a case. It didn’t matter how much time he had to spend in the building. He got anxious and overstimulated very quickly. The only thing that made it worse was when some guy flirted with his equally as anxious female coworker (who was also his best friend who he was also in love with). Every time a guy would flirt with her while she just stood there, uncomfortable and silent, his heart broke. He’d glare at the guy and if he still didn’t take that hint, say something. Luckily, this usually took care of any further interaction.
Apparently the only thing worse than some guy flirting with his best friend/crush was her being bait for a suspect. She was his exact type, physically speaking and personality wise. Spencer almost immediately objected when he saw the form fitting and revealing dress that JJ had helped her pick out. But he doubted he’d be able to convince Prentiss and Rossi to ditch the plan. It was the best one they had. At least Spencer got to go undercover with her as her date…although he didn’t know if this actually would make the situation better or worse.
He didn’t even notice that his hand was brushing against hers the whole ride. He also didn’t notice that he was sweating a little bit.
“You’d better not do that in the club…you’ll give us away.” She teases and he doesn’t know what she’s talking about until he is suddenly physically aware of the perspiration.
He chuckles. “I won’t. Don’t worry.” He takes a handkerchief out of his pocket and dabs his face and neck.
They arrive at the club. He gets out of the vehicle and helps her out. He suppressed a groan when she tugs on her dress to futilely get it to cover more of her thighs. He gingerly grasps her hand and leads her inside.
“Remember…be your shy sweet self but not too reserved and reluctant because we need-”
“The suspect outside, yes, I know, Spence. We’ll be ok.” She chuckles as she looks at him.
“I just don’t want you to get hurt.” He frowns.
“You think I want to get hurt.” She furrows her eyebrows.
“Of course not.” He shakes his head, smiling some. “But it’s my job to protect you and…I don’t wanna fail.”
“I have to let him get me outside, isolated and alone so that JJ and Luke can apprehend him. You can’t protect me once I’m on my own with him.” She states what he was trying not to think about. She was right, though, of course.
“Just…be careful, ok?” He squeezed her hand.
“I will, don’t worry.” She squeezed his back. “Hey, I’ve done better for longer on my field training that you have, remember?”
“I remember when you had to help me pass my test to still be qualified to carry a gun and be in the field.”
“And now you don’t even need my help. You’ve gotten better and I’m proud of you. There’s always room for improvement…even for me. I’ll be fine. I promise.”
Spencer still wasn’t sure about this whole situation as they took a seat at the bar at the club. There was only one seat available. Spencer thought about letting her take it as the lady while he stood but then an idea he liked struck him. He sat down on the bar stool, took a hold of her waist and hoisted her up into his lap. He held her tightly to him as he had his arms wrapped around her waist.
“What’re you doing?” She asked, slightly confused by his behavior.
“I’m your date. I’m being…friendly.”
“That’s not why.” She huffs slightly.
“Alright…I’m protecting you, then.” His breath tickles her ear.
“Do I have to be in your lap?”
“I would say that…yes, you do.” He said rather definitively.
They ordered drinks (he made sure to order her a virgin cocktail so she had no actual alcohol in her system, not only was this regulation for an undercover agent, but he knew the last thing he wanted was for her cognition to not be at 100%). They sipped their drinks as she remained in his lap.
Spencer remained vigilant to his surroundings when she had to be less subtle about it to maintain her “oblivious” undercover role. He was grateful that it made sense for a girl’s date to want to ward off any potential girl stealers. He was not so grateful that the suspect did not care about that (even if the whole point of being bait and undercover as a couple was to lure him in to apprehend him).
It didn’t escape her notice that he’d tighten his grip around her whenever any guy got particularly physically close to her for whatever reason (even if it was as innocuous as standing beside her at the bar to order drinks) even if they didn’t even glance at her, let alone talk to her.
“You can relax some, you know. The suspect is going to be much bolder. You don’t have to spike your poor heart rate over every little thing.”
“I care about you. I won’t have you getting hurt.”
“We went over this. I’m perfectly capable of-”
“I know, I know you are, ok? It’s not…it’s not that.”
“Then what is it?”
“It’s-”
“Excuse me…” An overly charming and soft voice says, cutting Spencer off.
Their eyes immediately flit over to the man that had suddenly appeared. Spencer’s blood runs cold when he realizes that this is the man that matches the descriptions that the bartenders and patrons had given.
Spencer tenses, gripping her hips tightly as he holds her to him.
“I was just at that table over there and couldn’t help notice this…vision of loveliness right here.” He smiles as his hand rests on her knee. She cringes. Spencer’s blood boils.
“Don’t touch her.” He says in a dangerously low tone.
“Oh come on…I’m not gonna hurt the little lady. I’m merely…admiring her.” He steps ever so closer.
“Back off.” Spencer says, or rather…he grits it out. His grip on her hips tightens and she’s starting to wonder if they’ll bruise if he grips any tighter or if he does so for long.
“Oh come on…don’t be such a hard ass. What do you say, darling? How’s about…you and I…ditch this guy and I’ll show you a real good time.” Spencer wishes he could punch that stupid smirk off his face and break his hand as it slides further up her thigh. She’s squirming in his lap, pressing back into him (which doesn’t help another situation).
“You won’t. She’s clearly uncomfortable. You should take a hint and piss off.”
While she is in actuality very uncomfortable around this man, she knows she needs to get him outside.
“Well I…” She forces herself to scoot a bit off of Spencer’s lap and closer to the man. Spencer doesn’t loosen the grip on her hips and pulls her back against him.
“See? The lady here does seem interested.” His smirk hasn’t disappeared as his fingers are now at the hem of her dress.
Spencer has to fight between his instinct to get her as far away from this man as possible and his recognition of the mission. He just glares at the man. Reluctantly, he keeps his mouth shut.
“That’s it…listen to your girl here. Come on, honey. He seems like a real fun guy but…I promise to show you a night you’ll never forget. You’ll feel things you’ve never felt before.”
She scoots off Spencer’s lap a bit and he reluctantly loosens his grip. The man wastes no time sliding an arm around her waist and pulling her closer to him. She lets him lead her away. Spencer’s knuckles turn white against the bar counter as he sees the bastard caress her and then sees his hand move lower and squeeze her ass.
He just prays that she can keep herself safe with her training. She couldn’t wear a wire or anything. But he had one to inform JJ and Luke that they were on their way out to them. All he had to do was wait. He heard the confirmation that they’d made it outside and had been spotted by the agents placed there in the alley.
“Guys…tell me what’s going on.” Spencer murmurs into the mic.
“She’s fine. Just sit tight, Spence.” JJ tries to calm him down. It doesn’t work.
“Don’t tell me to just sit tight, JJ. I…I can’t just sit tight knowing she’s out there with that monster. You’ve got eyes on her. Please tell me she’s ok.” Spencer says pleadingly.
“She’s handling herself, man, ok? She’s capable.” Luke now tries to assuage Spencer’s fears. This also is not successful.
“That’s also not what I asked, Luke.”
Spencer hears Luke sigh. “He’s got her up against the alley wall, ok?”
“Well what’s he doing to her?”
“Spence-”
“What’s he doing?” Spencer insisted.
“Well he’s…fondling her…kissing her neck.”
“Jesus Christ…when are you guys gonna apprehend him? What if he hurts her?” Spencer is starting to get very concerned.
“We have to wait.”
“For what?! For him to strangle her?!”
“We need to wait until there is probable cause for an arrest. She’ll fend him off and he’ll push too far.”
“But how far? Does her dress have to be ripped? Does she have to be humiliated coming back in here?” Spencer was getting angry at his friends. They knew how much he cared about her. He didn’t often get like this.
“Just another minute or so, then we’ll go, ok?” Luke says, hoping again that this’ll calm him.
“Ok…only that…no longer. You can’t leave her with him for longer than that. Please…please protect her.” Spencer says softly.
“We will, Spence. We promise.”
“Thank you.” He sighs in relief.
It is indeed only another minute or two before go time, with JJ and Luke revealing themselves to the suspect. He is startled when two FBI agents with guns come out of the shadows. But before he can get angry and lash out at them, he turns that anger towards his potential victim.
“You…bitch!” He seethes, spitting in her face, causing her to gasp. This causes Luke to push him against the wall as he handcuffs him.
“Alright. That’s enough, buddy. We’re taking you in now.”
“You set me up? This was a set up?! I didn’t do anything! You pigs set me up!” He yells as Luke wrestled him over and into a squad car down at the end of the alley.
JJ comforts her briefly as she stands shaking slightly against the wall.
“Go back inside. Spence is quite anxious to see you.”
She chuckles. “Yeah, I bet.”
She wanders back inside the club, tugging her dress to get it back in place, wiping her smudged lipstick off, wiping the spit off as well.
Spencer is out of his seat like a rocket and bounding towards her the second he sees her enter the door she’d exited out of. He doesn’t say anything as he engulfs her in a tight embrace.
“I’m so glad you’re ok.” He whispered softly in her ear.
“I’m always ok.”
“You don’t have to be. It’s ok to not be ok.” He caressed her back.
“I know. But I’m ok.”
“What if…what if I’m not?” He holds her tightly to him. He buried his face in her neck.
“Why would you…not be ok? I’m…I’m fine.”
“You don’t understand, hon. This whole thing…has been near torturous for me. Watching that man…talk to you…flirt with you…touch you and knowing he was…” He’s shaking now and he doesn’t even realize it.
She caresses his back. “Hey…hey…it’s ok. I’m ok. It’s all over now.” She whispered softly.
“I just didn’t want you to get hurt. If that monster had hurt you…”
“Why don’t we get out of here, huh? I think we should go.”
“Fucking finally.” He groans as he wraps an arm around her waist and swiftly makes his way with her to the front exit of the club. He takes a nice deep breath once he’s exposed to the cool night air. He didn’t even realize how suffocating that environment was to him.
He helps her back into the vehicle as it’s brought around and still keeps her close to him as they head to the hotel to decompress for the night.
Once in the calm peaceful safety of the hotel room, he grabs his sleepwear from his bag and then gets hers for her as well. She had retreated to the bathroom to remove her makeup and take the dress off. Spencer enters the bathroom without knocking. He gets an eyeful of his best friend in her underwear and his face turns red.
“Oh um…I’ll just…leave these here. Sorry.” He puts her sleep wear on the counter and turns quickly to leave, shutting the door behind him.
He changes outside the bathroom in the room, still very embarrassed about his faux pas. He should’ve knocked. He just had so much on his mind at that moment that he’d completely forgotten to do it.
He occupied himself with a book as he sat up on the bed. His head lifts when he hears the bathroom door open. As beautiful as she’d looked in that dress and makeup, she looked infinitely more comfortable in her sleep wear and with no makeup. And because she seemed so comfortable and relaxed now, she somehow seemed even more radiant to him.
“Hey.” He says softly as he smiles at her. “Feeling better?”
“Much better. Thank you.” She smiles back at him as she sits on her own bed.
He looks over at her as she gets her own book out to relax. She goes to put her earbuds in her ear and he stops her. He knows she’s going to listen to music.
“You don’t have to put those in. You can just…play it from the phone.”
She looks over at him. “Really? You’re sure? I dunno how you’re gonna feel about some of the music.”
“It’s fine. I’ll listen to whatever you wanna listen to.” He shrugged. He very much wanted to relax and listen to music together with her instead of it seeming like they were doing it separately.
“Ok. Don’t say I didn’t warn you, though.” She chuckles as she puts her earbuds away and turns the volume up on her phone to prepare to play her music.
“It can’t be that bad.”
“You say that now.” She smirks as she presses play.
Classical music starts to play.
“What do you mean you warned me? That’s just Mozart!” He exclaimed.
“For now.”
“Oh for now.” He chuckles, shaking his head. “What’s next…Wagner? Don’t get crazy now.”
“Oh you just wait, Reid…just you wait.”
“Don’t tell me you have Hans Zimmer on there. That’d be really crazy.” He joked.
“Something wrong with movie and tv soundtracks?”
“No, not at all! I love them too. I’m merely amused at what you consider crazy.”
His smile falls when metal music starts playing. She laughs at his confused expression.
“I told you I warned you!”
“Now I’m concerned about what you consider relaxing.” He raises his eyebrows.
“I can always put my earbuds in.” She offers, pointing to them.
“No…no. It’s fine. Then I’d just be concerned for your hearing.” He shakes his head.
“You’re awfully concerned about me a lot of the time.” She notes, pausing the music.
“Of course I am. You’re my best friend. I care about you.”
“Well yeah but…how much?” She queried.
“What do you mean?” He cocks his head.
She scoffs. “You know what I mean, genius. Now answer the question.”
“Well…um…I suppose that…the answer is…a lot.” His gaze is averted from her.
“Spencer…look at me please.” She requests softly.
He obeys and his gaze lifts to meet here. “Yes?” He asks softly.
“Enough to almost blow our chance of catching that scum?”
He chuckled sheepishly, remembering what he’d done. “Yeah…that much.”
She puts her book down and stands up, going over to his bed. He looks up at her as she stands in front of him. She smiles down at him as she reaches up to cup his face. He smiles back up at her, letting her touch him. He wasn’t bothered by her touch.
“You were really scared, weren’t you?” She asks softly.
“I was terrified.”
“Even though I can handle myself?”
“I know you can. That wasn’t the issue. The issue was…” he trails off and his gaze averts briefly.
“Yes?”
“I couldn’t rationalize it in my mind. I knew you could handle yourself but that didn’t seem to matter. I was still scared. I couldn’t calm down. All of my nerves were on edge.”
“But why? If you knew I’d be fine…why worry?”
“Because…I care about you…because…because I think I love you. No…that’s not…I-I know that I love you.”
“You love me? Really?” She smiles.
“Oh absolutely.” He smiled back. “I think I have for quite a while now, I just…I just didn’t know how to express that to you. I could never…find the right words.”
“You couldn’t find the right words?” She chuckles lightly.
“Believe it or not, no. But I’ve…I’ve never been very good at expressing my feelings.”
“Well…the great thing about feelings is…you don’t necessarily need words to express them.”
“You don’t?” He looked at her quizzically.
She shakes her head. “No. You don’t. Actions work just as well.”
“Act-”
She cuts him off for the first time ever by leaning down to kiss him softly. He smiles softly and presses into the kiss. He’s waited so long to feel her lips against his. And it’s just as wonderful as he imagined it would be.
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Everything To Me
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summary: Spencer is in love with his coworker and best friend and goes all out to celebrate her birthday on the day after when she catches her boyfriend in bed with another woman when they arrive home from a case.
this is 100% season 1 spencer
warning: cheating, making out, angst/comfort
“(Y/N)! Wait up!” Spencer stumbled, tripping over his feet as he hurried to catch the elevator with his friend. He covered the distance from his desk to the elevator doors in record time as (Y/N) hit the button to presumably hold open the doors for him. He slid in and stood next to her while panting lightly. He really needed to do some cardio, he noted to himself.
“Wow, with speed like that I should start calling you Barry Allen,” she giggled, making Spencer's heart flutter in the best and most terrifying way and drawing a laugh out of his throat (even though he didn’t really get the reference). He couldn't help it when all he could think about was how much he wanted to hear that laugh every day for the rest of his life.
“Sorry,” he flashed a sheepish smile at her and ducked his head a little bit as he felt his cheeks heat up slightly.
“Hey, uh, I was wondering if you had any, uh, any plans for the evening? There’s a Star Trek: The Next Generation marathon and I know that’s your favorite Star Trek series so I was thinking maybe we could hang out and maybe get some takeout?"
"That sounds like it would be a hell of a time," she began. Spencer could already feel the incoming, "but I promised Warren I'd spend the evening with him since it's my birthday and all." Spencer had to keep himself from making a face at the mention of her asshole of a boyfriend, not wanting to upset her, and so instead he opted to skip over that and react to the next part of her statement.
"Wait it's your birthday? Why didn't you say anything? We all would have done something to celebrate before going home today," Spencer started kicking himself internally. How could he not have known today was her birthday? The two of them had become attached at the hip pretty much since she started at the BAU 4 months ago. She had even celebrated his own birthday with him and the rest of the team.
“Hey, it’s okay! You don’t need to feel bad or anything, I tend to just treat my birthday like it’s any other day so I often just don't even tell anyone when it is,” she shot him a sweet smile in an attempt to assure him that it was okay but it didn't make him feel any less guilty.
Spencer's heart sank a bit at the thought of not being able to celebrate (Y/N)'s birthday with her, but he knew Warren was important to her regardless of how much Spencer and the team disliked him. He mustered a smile and nodded, "No worries, spending time with Warren sounds great. Happy birthday, (Y/N). I hope your day is as wonderful as you are."
(Y/N) blushed at the compliment, waving it off modestly. The elevator dinged softly, indicating they had reached the ground floor. As the doors slid open, they stepped out into the bustling lobby of the FBI building. Spencer glanced at his watch and realized it was already late in the evening.
"Well, I should let you get going. Have a fantastic birthday night with Warren," Spencer said, trying to hide his disappointment behind a cheerful facade.
"Thank you, Spencer. I really appreciate it. We should definitely catch that Star Trek marathon another time," she replied with a warm smile before turning to head towards the exit.
Later in the evening, Spencer found himself sitting on his worn-out couch, a container of lukewarm Chinese takeout resting in his lap as he absentmindedly watched reruns of Star Trek. His mind kept wandering back to the encounter in the elevator with (Y/N) earlier that day. The missed opportunity to spend her birthday with her weighed heavily on his heart.
Just as Captain Picard was about to make a diplomatic decision that could change the course of an entire star system, Spencer's phone rang, jolting him out of his thoughts. He glanced at the screen to see (Y/N)'s name flashing brightly.
With a mixture of confusion and worry, he answered the call. "Hey, (Y/N), is everything okay?" His heart clenched at the sound of her quiet sobs on the other end of the line.
"Spencer," her voice cracked, "can you... can you come pick me up?"
Without another word, Spencer sprang into action. "Of course, (Y/N). I'll be right there. Where are you?" Spencer's voice was filled with concern as he quickly grabbed his keys and rushed out the door, leaving behind the half-eaten container of Chinese takeout and the flickering TV screen showing Star Trek.
As he drove through the quiet streets towards (Y/N)'s location, thoughts raced through Spencer's mind. Why was she crying? What had happened? He couldn't bear the thought of her in distress, especially on her birthday.
Finally reaching the spot where she said she would be, Spencer spotted (Y/N) sitting on a bench outside of a sketchy looking apartment complex, her head buried in her hands. He parked the car and hurried over to her, his heart breaking at the sight of her tear-streaked face.
"(Y/N), what's wrong?" Spencer knelt down beside her, gently placing a hand on her back. She looked up at him with red, puffy eyes, and he felt a crack in his chest
as her trembling voice filled the cool night air.
"I... I waited for Warren at my apartment, but he never showed up or called. I got worried and went to his place," she paused, taking a shuddering breath before continuing, "I let myself in with my key, and... and I found him in bed with another woman."
Shock rippled through Spencer as he struggled to process her words. The image of (Y/N) standing in the doorway of Warren's apartment, witnessing such a betrayal, tore at his heart. Anger flared within him, directed not only at Warren but at the unfairness of it all. How could someone as kind and genuine as (Y/N) be treated so callously?
Without hesitation, Spencer pulled (Y/N) into a tight embrace, offering her solace in the warmth of his arms. He felt her tears soak into his shirt as she clung to him, seeking comfort amidst the storm of emotions raging within her.
As she sobbed into his chest he felt tears pricking his own eyes. He gently cupped her head and started stroking her hair in an attempt to soothe her before saying, “let’s get you into the car, okay?”
As Spencer led (Y/N) to his car, he couldn't shake the image of her devastated face from his mind. The weight of her heartbreak hung heavy in the air, suffocating him with a sense of helplessness. He opened the car door for her, watching as she settled into the passenger seat with a heavy sigh.
"I'm so sorry, (Y/N)," Spencer murmured softly as he started the engine, casting a sympathetic glance her way. "You deserve so much better than this."
(Y/N) let out a bitter laugh, devoid of any humor. "I should have known better than to get my hopes up. This is why I never celebrate my birthday. It’s more trouble than it’s worth," she confessed, her voice laced with resignation and nothing more than a whisper by the very end. Spencer's heart clenched at her words. He wanted nothing more than to ease her pain, to show her that she deserved all the love and happiness in the world.
"You deserve to be celebrated, (Y/N)," Spencer said with conviction, his eyes meeting hers in the dim light of the car. "No one has the right to make you feel otherwise. You are kind, beautiful, and deserving of all the love and joy that life has to offer."
Spencer's words echoed in (Y/N)'s mind as they drove through the quiet streets of the city, the soft glow of streetlights casting a serene ambiance over the car. The heaviness of her heart began to lift ever so slightly, buoyed by the sincerity in Spencer's eyes and the comfort of his presence beside her.
As they reached a stoplight, Spencer turned to (Y/N) with a tentative smile. "How about we make a detour?" he suggested gently. "There's this little ice cream shop a few blocks away. Maybe some ice cream might help lift your spirits."
(Y/N) managed a small smile in return, touched by Spencer's thoughtfulness. The simple gesture felt like a ray of sunshine breaking through the storm clouds that had gathered around her heart. "That sounds nice," she replied softly, her voice still tinged with sadness but with a glimmer of gratitude shining through.
They parked near the ice cream shop, its cheerful neon sign beckoning them inside. The bell above the door jingled as they stepped in, greeted by the sweet scent of freshly made waffle cones and a colorful display of ice cream flavors. Spencer guided (Y/N) to a cozy booth by the window, where they could watch the world pass by as they indulged in their frozen treats.
As they savored their ice cream, the heaviness in (Y/N)'s heart began to thaw, melting away with each spoonful of creamy sweetness. Spencer listened attentively as she shared snippets of her favorite childhood memories, her voice soft and wistful against the backdrop of cheerful chatter from other customers.
Once they had finished their ice cream, Spencer suggested another detour. "There's this little vintage store down the street that always has some classic movies on sale. How about we pick up one of your favorites and head back to my place to watch it?”
(Y/N) hesitated before saying, “I don’t know about picking up anything from a store but is that Star Trek marathon still on?” The slight amount of hope in her voice made Spencer’s heart flutter with a mix of relief and warmth. He had been longing for a chance to make her smile, to see a glimmer of happiness light up her eyes once more.
Nodding enthusiastically, he replied, "Absolutely! We can swing by the store another time. For now, let's head straight to my place for that Star Trek marathon." The anticipation in (Y/N)'s eyes was palpable as they made their way to Spencer's cozy apartment. The familiar scent of old books and fresh laundry greeted them as they stepped inside, the soft glow of string lights casting a warm ambiance over the living room.
Spencer turned the TV back on, dimming the lights to create a cozy home-theater atmosphere. They settled on the couch, surrounded by plush pillows and soft blankets, basking in the nostalgic thrill of the sci-fi classic unfolding on the screen.
As the episode played on, Spencer got up and reheated the Chinese food from earlier and putting it on plates for each of them. He grabbed himself a fork and got one of the sets of chopsticks from the restaurant for (Y/N). As he made his way back to the living room he saw (Y/N) happily rocking back and forth as she watched Data and Geordi share another one of their intriguing engineering discussions. Spencer couldn't help but smile at the sight, a flicker of contentment lighting up his own heart as he handed (Y/N) the plate with her food and settled back onto the couch beside her.
Between bites of General Tso's chicken and sips of hot tea, Spencer couldn't help but feel a sense of peace settle over him. The soft glow of the TV cast shadows across the room, creating a cocoon of warmth and familiarity around them. The gentle hum of the spaceship's engines on screen seemed to lull them both into a comfortable silence, broken only by the occasional chuckle or comment about the characters.
After a few episodes, Spencer found himself stealing glances at (Y/N) out of the corner of his eye, admiring the soft curve of her profile as she watched intently. He could see a spark of joy in her eyes, a fleeting moment of escape from the weight of unspoken emotions that lingered between them. Sensing a rare moment of vulnerability, Spencer cleared his throat softly before turning to (Y/N) with a gentle smile.
"Hey, (Y/N)," he began, his voice soft and tentative. "I was wondering... If you could have done anything for your birthday today, what would it have been?"
(Y/N) paused, her gaze shifting from the screen to Spencer. Her expression softened as she considered the question, a faint blush dusting her cheeks. "You know, I've always wanted to visit the Smithsonian," she murmured, her eyes distant with longing. "And maybe the Botanic Gardens too... It's on my list of things to do someday."
Spencer nodded, committing her words to memory as he filed away the simple desires she shared. He made a mental note to himself, silently vowing to make those dreams a reality for her someday.
As they finished the last episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation, Spencer noticed the clock on the wall ticking closer to midnight. With a sense of reluctance, he turned to (Y/N) and said, "I hate to cut this short, but it's getting late. I should call a cab for you."
(Y/N) looked up at him, a mixture of disappointment and understanding in her eyes. She nodded quietly, gathering her things and slipping on her coat. As Spencer dialed for a cab, he couldn't shake off the feeling of missed opportunities hanging heavy in the air.
The subdued sound of the approaching cab echoed through the quiet street outside. Spencer opened the door for (Y/N), his gaze lingering on her for a moment longer than necessary. "I'll be picking you up at 11 am tomorrow so be dressed and ready," he said, surprising both himself and (Y/N) with his sudden declaration.
Confusion flashed across her face as she stammered, "But... why? Where are we going?"
"Just make sure you’re ready,” he smiled, ideas blossoming in his mind as he decided he was going to show her what her birthday meant to him. He closed the cab door behind her and waved as the car drove off before turning on his heel and heading back inside, preparing to show his best friend the time of her life tomorrow.
Spencer woke up at 8 am the next morning to the soft rays of sunlight filtering through the curtains, illuminating his room in a golden hue. Rubbing the sleep from his eyes, he stretched his arms above his head and swung his legs over the edge of the bed. Today was going to be special; he was determined to make it a day that (Y/N) would never forget.
Remembering her mention once that morning glories were her favorite flower, Spencer decided to start by weaving a delicate flower crown out of the vibrant blooms he had picked from his backyard garden. As he carefully intertwined the petals and vines into a crown fit for a queen, he couldn't help but smile at the thought of seeing (Y/N) wear it.
After finishing the flower crown, Spencer's thoughts drifted to a memory she had shared with him long ago. Before her parents had passed away, they used to build her a pillow fort and hang fairy lights in it on special occasions. Determined to recreate that sense of childhood magic for her, Spencer set about constructing a fort in his living room. He gathered every pillow and blanket he could find, stacking them strategically to form the walls of the fort. With a bit of effort and creativity, he managed to fashion an elaborate yet cozy hideaway filled with soft cushions and twinkling fairy lights. His PhD in Engineering was finally seeing some use.
As he stepped back to admire his handiwork, Spencer's heart swelled with a mix of emotions. The soft glow of the lights cast a warm, inviting aura over the fort, creating an atmosphere of whimsy and nostalgia. He could almost picture the look of wonder on (Y/N)'s face when she saw it, and the thought filled him with a sense of anticipation.
With the fort completed, Spencer glanced at the clock and realized it was almost time to pick up (Y/N). Quickly changing into a clean shirt and vest and grabbing the flower crown he had made earlier, he made his way out the door, excitement bubbling in his chest.
As he drove to (Y/N)'s apartment, Spencer's mind was a whirlwind of nerves and anticipation. He parked the car a few blocks away, wanting to give himself a moment to compose himself before their day together began. Taking a deep breath, he stepped out onto the sidewalk and started the short walk to her building.
The street was alive with the sounds of the city waking up - the distant hum of traffic, the chatter of early risers going about their day. But in Spencer's mind, all he could focus on was the image of (Y/N) in his mind, wearing the flower crown he had made for her.
Finally reaching her apartment building, he climbed the steps to her floor, his heart pounding in his chest. Standing in front of her door, he took one last deep breath before lifting his hand to knock.
The sound echoed through the hallway, reverberating in Spencer's ears as he waited with bated breath. After what felt like an eternity, he heard footsteps approaching from inside the apartment. The soft shuffling of footsteps grew louder, and Spencer's pulse quickened in anticipation. Suddenly, the gentle click of the door being unlocked filled the air, and it slowly swung open to reveal (Y/N) standing before him.
She looked breathtaking. (Y/N) was wearing a simple yet elegant dress with cute buttons lining the front and a delicate peter pan collar. Her chin length bob was slightly curved under her chin and her bangs fell across her forehead in such a perfect way and Spencer looked away quickly, his cheeks burning when he realized he was staring. For a moment, they stood there in silence, the air thick with unspoken words and emotions.
Then, Spencer slowly brought forward the flower crown he had hidden behind his back, holding it out towards (Y/N) with a shaky hand. “Happy birthday," he finally whispered, his voice barely above a breath as he nervously offered her the crown. The soft petals of the flowers brushed against her fingertips, and (Y/N)'s eyes widened in surprise and delight as she took the flower crown from Spencer's hand. A small gasp escaped her lips as she held the delicate creation, a mix of awe and gratitude shining in her eyes as she looked up at him.
"Spencer, it's beautiful," she murmured as she gently placed it atop her head, her voice soft with emotion. The sun was just beginning to rise, casting a golden glow that illuminated her features, making her look even more ethereal. In that moment, caught in the gentle morning light, Spencer felt a swell of affection for her that threatened to overwhelm him.
After a beat of silence filled with unspoken words hanging in the air between them, Spencer cleared his throat and offered a hesitant smile. "Are you ready to go?" he asked, his heart beating a little faster at the prospect of spending the day with her.
(Y/N) returned his smile with a nod, her eyes sparkling with anticipation as she looped her arm through his, the flower crown perched delicately on her head. They strolled down the bustling street, the city waking up around them with a cacophony of sounds and scents. Spencer couldn't help but steal glances at (Y/N), her presence beside him filling him with a warmth he hadn't felt before.
Their first stop was a cozy bookshop just across the street from her apartment building. The bell above the door chimed softly as they entered, and the scent of aged paper and ink enveloped them in a comforting embrace. Rows upon rows of books lined the shelves, each one whispering promises of new worlds and adventures.
"Pick out as many as you'd like," Spencer said, gesturing to the endless array of titles surrounding them. (Y/N)'s eyes widened in delight, a soft gasp escaping her lips as she wandered through the aisles, her fingers trailing over spines in search of stories. He watched as she made her way through the shelves until she reached the SciFi/Fantasy and Horror section and begin removing books from the shelves, reading the backs and either adding them to the stack in her arms or placing them back on the shelves.
Spencer couldn't help but admire the way (Y/N) immersed herself in the world of books, her eyes alight with a passion that made her even more enchanting. She moved with purpose, carefully selecting each book as if it held a piece of her soul within its pages. His heart swelled with fondness for her, her love for literature reflecting a depth to her character that he found endlessly captivating.
As (Y/N) returned back to him, her arms filled with a stack of books that seemed to reach towards the sky, she gave him a sheepish smile. "I might have gotten a bit carried away," she admitted, a hint of embarrassment coloring her cheeks. “Could you help me narrow things down a little bit?”
Spencer chuckled softly, his eyes crinkling at the corners in amusement. "No need to apologize. Let's see what treasures you've found," he said, reaching out to take a few books from her arms. Together, they perused the titles she had chosen, discussing the plots and themes. After they had no luck in narrowing down the pile, Spencer scooped them all up into his arms in a stack and began making his way to the checkout stand.
"Why bother narrowing it down?" Spencer's voice was filled with a playful lilt as he carried the stack of books towards the checkout counter, (Y/N) trailing behind him with a smile tugging at the corners of her lips.
"Impressive selection," the bookstore clerk commented as he rung up the stack of books, each title a window into (Y/N)'s interests and desires. (Y/N) beamed at the compliment, her eyes shining with confusion and gratitude as Spencer pulled out his wallet and paid before she could even reach for her own from her bag.
As they left the bookshop, the sun had climbed higher in the sky, casting a warm glow over the crowded streets. The sounds of the city swirled around them—honking cars, lively chatter, and the distant rumble of a passing train. Spencer glanced over at (Y/N) walking beside him, her face illuminated by a soft radiance.
(Y/N) quickly unlocked the door and placed the bags of books onto her dining room table before they walked back outside. Spencer patiently waited as she locked her door before holding his arm out again for her to grab on to as he lead her to his car.
As they arrived at the Smithsonian Air and Space Museum, Spencer's steps were light with anticipation. The air was alive with the promise of discovery, and he couldn't wait to share this world of wonders with (Y/N). The museum loomed before them like a giant treasure trove, its grand architecture a testament to human ingenuity and ambition.
Stepping inside, they were greeted by a vast hall filled with aircraft suspended from the ceiling like metallic birds frozen in flight. (Y/N)'s eyes widened in awe, her gaze flitting from one exhibit to another as Spencer led her through the maze of history and innovation.
"This is the Wright Flyer," Spencer said, pointing towards the iconic biplane that started it all. "It's incredible to think that this simple machine paved the way for all modern aviation."
As they moved deeper into the museum, Spencer's voice became a gentle murmur of knowledge and passion. He regaled (Y/N) with stories of astronauts who dared to venture beyond Earth's atmosphere and the technological advancements that made it all possible. (Y/N) listened with rapt attention, her eyes shimmering with wonder and admiration for both the exhibits and the man beside her.
Each artifact held a story, a piece of history waiting to be unraveled. Spencer's explanations brought life to the static displays, turning them into vibrant tales of human courage and scientific progress. He pointed out the intricate details of each spacecraft, each spacesuit, each photograph, as if they were sacred relics in a grand temple of human achievement.
As they entered the lunar module exhibit, (Y/N) gasped in awe at the sight of the actual spacecraft that had touched the surface of the moon as well as a piece of rock from the moon that was free for visitors to touch. She reached out a hand as if to touch it, but stopped herself, as if afraid to disturb the fragile connection between past and present.
Spencer noticed her hesitation and smiled softly. "It's okay, you can touch it," he encouraged. "Feel the history in your fingers."
(Y/N) tentatively reached out and brushed her fingertips against the cool, pitted surface of the moon rock. A jolt of electricity seemed to pass through her as she made contact, connecting her to a distant world that had once seemed so unreachable. Her eyes shimmered with unshed tears, overwhelmed by the weight of history and the magnitude of human achievement.
Spencer watched her with a mix of admiration and fondness, his heart swelling with a bittersweet ache at the sight of her emotional response. He longed to reach out and comfort her, to share in this moment of vulnerability and connection, but he held back, knowing that some experiences were meant to be felt in solitude.
As they moved on to the space shuttle exhibit, Spencer's voice took on a reverent tone as he explained the intricacies of space travel and the courage of those who dared to venture into the unknown. (Y/N) listened intently, hanging onto his every word as if they were precious treasures. The stories of the astronauts and their daring adventures resonated with her in a way she couldn't quite explain. It was as if each tale of exploration and discovery tugged at something deep within her, awakening a yearning for the stars that had long been dormant.
After exploring the wonders of the cosmos in the Air and Space Museum, Spencer suggested they visit the Museum of Natural History next. (Y/N) eagerly agreed, her curiosity piqued by the promise of delving into the mysteries of the natural world.
The moment they stepped into the museum, a wave of earthy scents enveloped them—the musty aroma of ancient fossils, the fresh green fragrance of preserved plants, and the tangy scent of minerals. (Y/N) took a deep breath, savoring the rich tapestry of odors that surrounded her as they ventured deeper into the exhibits.
Spencer guided her through halls filled with towering skeletons of dinosaurs, exotic taxidermy specimens, and sparkling gemstones that seemed to whisper tales of ancient worlds and forgotten creatures. His voice, now a gentle hum of fascination, wove intricate stories of the natural wonders before them, each exhibit a chapter in the never-ending book of Earth's history.
With every step, (Y/N) felt herself being transported back in time, her senses overwhelmed by the sights, sounds, and scents of a world long gone yet preserved within the walls of the museum. She marveled at the sheer diversity of life that had once inhabited the planet, from the majestic bones of a towering T-Rex to the delicate wings of a butterfly frozen in time.
As they reached the Butterfly Pavilion, (Y/N)'s eyes lit up with childlike excitement. She walked among the lush greenery, her fingers gently trailing over velvety leaves and vibrant petals as she inspected each plant with keen interest. Spencer watched her with a soft smile, his admiration for her knowledge and passion shining in his eyes.
"It’s like stepping into a living kaleidoscope," (Y/N) breathed, her voice hushed with wonder. "Each butterfly and moth, every plant here tells a story of adaptation and survival. Look at this one," she gestured to a plump monarch butterfly sipping nectar from a bright orange bloom, "did you know they migrate for thousands of miles to escape the cold?"
Spencer was happy to listen intently to her spout knowledge that he already held, captivated by the gleam in her eyes and the animated gestures that accompanied each explanation. He found himself falling even more deeply under her spell as she shared her wealth of knowledge, her voice growing more animated with each tidbit of information.
As they wandered through the pavilion, (Y/N) pointed out the intricate patterns on the butterflies' wings, explaining their purpose and significance with a mix of scientific precision and unbridled enthusiasm. Spencer couldn't help but be swept up in her passion, feeling a warmth bloom in his chest at the sight of her so fully immersed in her element. Her rarely used PhDs in Botany and Microbiology shone brightly through her words and actions as she explained the importance of every living thing within the enclosure down to the network of fungal mycelium in the dirt, making Spencer see her in a whole new light. The way she spoke about each species of butterfly or moth, each plant or fungus they saw, showcased not only her expertise but also her deep love and respect for the natural world.
Spencer found himself hanging onto her every word, just as she had done with his tales of space exploration earlier. He admired the way her eyes sparkled with excitement, the way her hands gestured animatedly as if conducting a symphony of knowledge and wonder.
As they reached a secluded corner of the pavilion, (Y/N) knelt down beside a cluster of milkweed plants, her voice soft and reverent as she explained their importance to the monarch butterflies. Spencer watched her intently, a sense of peace settling over him as he observed her in her element. He then checked his watch, his eyes widening in realization as he saw the time. They were going to be late for the dinner reservation he had managed to secure at the new Italian restaurant (Y/N) had been longing to try for months. With a gentle touch on her shoulder, Spencer interrupted her explanation about the symbiotic relationship between the milkweed plants and monarch butterflies.
"(Y/N), as much as I hate to interrupt your fascinating lesson, we should start heading out. We have a dinner reservation," Spencer said apologetically, a hint of regret in his tone.
Startled by the mention of dinner, (Y/N) straightened up, her eyes widening in surprise before a sheepish smile crossed her face. "Oh gosh, I completely lost track of time! I'm so sorry, Spencer. Let's go."
They hurried through the Butterfly Pavilion, their steps quickening as they made their way to the exit. Spencer opened the passenger door for her as they approached his car, and they soon found themselves seated inside as Spencer started the engine. The warmth of the setting sun bathed the interior in a golden glow, casting long shadows across (Y/N)'s face as she fastened her seatbelt. She glanced over at Spencer, her eyes shining with a mix of excitement and anticipation for the evening ahead.
The drive to the Italian restaurant was filled with comfortable silence, the only sound the soft hum of the radio playing a mellow jazz tune in the background. Spencer stole glances at (Y/N) from time to time, admiring how the fading light accentuated her features, casting her in a soft, ethereal glow.
Arriving at the restaurant, they were greeted by the tantalizing aroma of garlic and tomato sauce wafting through the air. The cozy ambiance of the place enveloped them as they were led to their table, nestled in a corner with a flickering candle casting dancing shadows on their faces.
As they perused the menu, (Y/N)'s eyes widened in delight as she scanned the offerings, her excitement palpable. Spencer couldn't help but smile at her enthusiasm, feeling a warmth in his chest that had nothing to do with the romantic candlelight surrounding them. This moment, this simple act of sharing a meal with her, felt like a glimpse into the life he had always wanted but never dared to reach for.
Their conversation flowed effortlessly, filled with laughter and shared stories. (Y/N)'s eyes sparkled with joy as she recounted a hilarious mishap at work, and Spencer found himself hanging onto her every word once again. It was moments like these that made him forget about his own worries and fears, immersing himself in the present moment.
As the waiter brought out their food, the table was soon filled with plates of steaming pasta and fragrant sauces. The first bite sent a burst of flavors dancing on (Y/N)'s tongue, and she couldn't help but close her eyes in bliss. Spencer watched her savor each mouthful, her expression a symphony of delight and contentment. The flickering candlelight played on her face, accentuating the curve of her smile and the sparkle in her eyes.
Spencer's gaze lingered on her, a sense of longing tugging at his heart. He wanted to freeze this moment in time, to etch it into his memory forever. The warmth of the restaurant, the soft glow of the candle, the sound of (Y/N)'s laughter – all of it wove together into a tapestry of perfect happiness.
But beneath the surface of their shared joy, Spencer felt a pang of bittersweet realization. This was just a moment, a fleeting interlude in their lives. Tomorrow, they would return to their separate paths, their separate dreams.
As (Y/N) reached for her glass of wine, her hand brushed against his, sending a jolt of electricity through him. Their eyes met, and in that brief moment of connection, Spencer felt a surge of courage wash over him. As they finished their meals, the waiter returned to their table with a flourish, presenting a tray of decadent desserts that Spencer had secretly ordered while (Y/N) was in the bathroom. A smile played on his lips as he watched her eyes widen in surprise and delight at the unexpected treat.
"Spencer, you didn't have to do this," she murmured, her voice soft with gratitude.
"It's my pleasure," he replied, his tone gentle yet tinged with a hint of nervousness. "Would you like to enjoy it here or take it to go and eat it while watching something?"
(Y/N) hesitated for a moment, her gaze flickering between the cozy restaurant ambiance and the promise of a quiet moment elsewhere. After a brief pause, she decided, "Let's take it to go."
Spencer nodded in agreement and politely requested the bill. As he settled the payment, a sense of resolve settled in him, guiding his actions as they left the restaurant. The cool night air caressed their skin as they walked towards Spencer's car parked just around the corner. He opened the passenger door for her, a gesture that was both chivalrous and intimate.
As they drove through the city streets, (Y/N) couldn't shake off the feeling of curiosity that gnawed at her mind. Why were they headed to Spencer's apartment instead of hers, as she had anticipated? Her thoughts raced, trying to find an explanation for this unexpected turn of events.
Upon arriving at his apartment building, Spencer handed her the to-go boxes with their desserts before unlocking the door. A sense of bewilderment washed over (Y/N) as she followed him inside. Before she could voice her confusion, Spencer moved behind her and gently covered her eyes with his hands, guiding her further into his apartment.
The faint scent of his cologne lingered in the air as (Y/N) let herself be led by Spencer through the dimly lit hallway. Her heart raced with a mix of anticipation and curiosity, her trust in him unwavering as he guided her with careful steps. The soft shuffle of their feet echoed in the corridor, creating a rhythm that seemed to match the beat of her own pulse.
After what felt like an eternity of darkness behind her closed eyelids, Spencer's hands finally left (Y/N)'s eyes, revealing a mesmerizing sight before her. As she blinked away the temporary blindness, a gasp escaped her lips at the magical scene that unfolded in front of her.
The room was transformed into a whimsical wonderland – an elaborate pillow fort stretched across the space, twinkling with fairy lights that cast a warm, inviting glow. Soft blankets cascaded down like waterfalls, creating nooks and crannies that held the promise of cozy comfort. The air was scented with old books, eucalyptus, and lavender, adding to the ethereal atmosphere that surrounded them.
Spencer watched (Y/N) with bated breath as she took in the sight before her. The flickering lights danced across her face, illuminating the awe and wonder reflected in her eyes. It was a moment frozen in time, suspended between reality and a dream.
"Happy birthday, (Y/N)," Spencer's voice was barely a whisper, filled with a vulnerability that he had never dared to show before.
Tears welled up in (Y/N)'s eyes, moved by the effort and thoughtfulness he had put into creating this enchanting surprise. She turned to face him, her heart overflowing with emotions she struggled to put into words.
"Spencer, this is... it's perfect," she finally managed to say, her voice trembling with emotion. She reached out to grasp his hand, holding onto it as though afraid this magical moment would slip away if she let go.
As they settled into the cocoon of blankets and pillows, Spencer grabbed his laptop from his desk and popped a DVD into the disc player. The opening to a movie he had never seen but had heard her talk about multiple times, Clueless, played in the background but all he could do was look at her. Under the twinkling of the fairy lights he could almost swear she had to be a fairy herself. That’s the only thing he could think of that would explain her beauty.
As the movie played on (Y/N) explained to Spencer that it was actually an adaptation of her favorite novel by Jane Austen, Emma, which did little to make him feel the main character was more likeable but watching her happily chatter about the movie filled him with a sense of comfort and affection. This is how it should always be, he thought to himself, wrapping his arms around her as she settled against his chest.
They sat and cuddled in a comfortable silence until it was broken by her voice, soft and timid as she said, “hey Spence?”
“Hm?” He hummed into her hair, his eyes closed.
“Why did you do all of this?” She queried, sounding like she was on the verge of tears, which immediately pulled Spencer from his half asleep haze.
Spencer thought about his next words carefully, taking so long that (Y/N) was about to ask if he had fallen asleep before he finally responded. “After seeing you so heartbroken last night and seeing how Warren just tossed you aside like you didn’t matter I just felt like I should show you how much it means to me that you exist." His voice was gentle, barely a whisper as he confessed the depth of his feelings for her.
(Y/N) felt her breath catch in her throat at his words. The vulnerability in his voice touched her heart in a way she had never experienced before. She turned to look into his eyes, seeing the sincerity and care reflected back at her.
Tears glistened in her eyes as she reflexively leaned into his hand as he reached to cup her cheek, caressing it with a tenderness that spoke volumes. "Spencer," she murmured, her voice filled with emotion, "you didn’t have to—I’m not worth all this—I-I don’t—"
He placed a finger on her lips, silencing her words. "That’s what I’ve spent all day trying to show you, (Y/N). You are worth it. You are worth everything to me," he whispered, his gaze unwavering.
In that moment, (Y/N) felt a rush of emotions swell within her, a mix of disbelief and overwhelming gratitude. Her heart pounded in her chest as she gazed into Spencer's eyes, seeing a depth of love and sincerity that she had never expected to find. The weight of his words hung heavy in the air, wrapping around them like a warm embrace.
As they sat there, suspended in time, (Y/N) felt a gentle tug at her heart urging her to lean forward. She hesitated for a moment, uncertainty clouding her mind as she debated the implications of such a gesture. Could she allow herself to be vulnerable again after everything she had been through? Was it worth risking her heart for the possibility of something more?
But before she could overthink it any further, Spencer's gaze softened even more as he leaned in towards her. In the briefest moment of hesitation, his lips hovered centimeters away from hers, silently asking for permission. And just as he began to pull back, (Y/N) plunged forward, closing the distance between them as she pressed her lips against Spencer's. It was a tender, tentative kiss filled with all the unspoken words and emotions that had lingered between them for so long. The world seemed to stand still as they shared this intimate moment, their hearts beating in harmony.
Spencer was momentarily stunned by the sudden turn of events, but as he felt (Y/N)'s warmth against his lips, all doubts and insecurities melted away. When they finally pulled away, they were both met with flushed cheeks and wide eyes. There was a charged energy in the air, a newfound connection that sparked between them like a flame igniting in the darkness.
"(Y/N)," Spencer whispered, his voice barely above a breath as he searched her eyes for confirmation.
(Y/N) simply smiled, a radiant expression that lit up her face with joy and relief. “I love you, Spencer,” falls from her lips before she crashes them back against his.
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More Than A Feeling
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This was just a random idea to distract me from revising for my exams. I'm slightly obsessed with him at the moment and just wanted to write some fluff that would make me even more sad than i already am. I know I also said that I would be doing a bucky barnes fic but... i got distracted and now can't commit to writing it. I'll probably write it eventually but i can't bring myself to do it right now.
I was also listening to More Than A Feeling by Boston when writing this so... it stuck.
Just a small fic of Steve Harrington and a bookworm reader girlfriend who is also Dustin's sister after their first time and the "chaos" that ensues.
Warnings: Fluff fluff fluff, Suggestive, Both Steve's and Reader's 'first time'
Steve Harrington x Henderson!Reader
Dustin couldn't understand how it all happened or exactly when you stopped disliking the King of Hawkins but he was convinced it would all end in heartbreak. He did like Steve Harrington after he protected them all from all the dangers they had faced over the years. But dating his sister was a different matter.
To say he is overprotective of you would be an understatement.
You had spent your entire life protecting him from bullies and assholes and now it was his turn to keep you from the possible heartbreak that was Steve Harrington.
So when he peaked through the door to your room and saw the two of you curled round each other fast asleep, he couldn't help but feel upset and scared for you. It clearly wasn't the first time Steve had snuck through the window without anyone but you knowing and the thought brought disgust to his gut. He had invited his friends round as your parents were away. He now regretted the idea and wished he had agreed when Mike suggested his house instead.
He wasn't being dramatic, he had every right to believe that you could end up like all the other girls.
Before he could wake you both up, though, his friends had pulled him back and disappeared back into his room to discuss what they had just seen.
Steve, on the other hand, couldn't be happier.
Your head rests on his chest, arms wrapped round his body. A sheet covers you and he brings his hand up and down your arm gently as he gazes at you asleep. He has been like this since he woke up to see you curled round him, hair a mess, no makeup on and breathing softly onto his bare chest.
What had happened the night before had surprised you both, if he was quite honest with himself. He had been ready from the second date with you but you had made it clear that you wanted to wait. He had thought he was ready when he dated Nancy but when the time came, he froze and ruined the moment.
But now, here you were snuggled up close with memories of the night before playing through your dreams as your boyfriend watches over you lovingly. He can't remember ever loving anyone as much as he loves you and all he wants is to tell you, and keep you by his side till the day he dies.
Just as his hand stops grazing your arm, you roll over off of him and wriggle onto your side, still facing him. Your lips pull up into a brief smile before dropping again. He shifts his body onto his side too and props his head onto his arms, watching as your eyebrows pull together and your eyes flutter open slowly.
A huge grin falls onto his lips as you look up groggily with a bashful smile.
"Morning, beautiful." His voice is still husky from sleep and a thousand butterflies take flight in your stomach.
"Morning." You rub a hand over your eyes to try and wake up properly, to no avail.
"I was gonna make breakfast, if you're hungry." He lifts his head off his arm to give you a playful look that is sleepily returned.
He gets up from the bed and tries to track down his trousers and socks before perching on the edge of the bed to give you a soft kiss that lingers longer than usual.
His blushing face then leaves your eyesight and you roll onto your back with a disbelieving laugh, quickly covering your mouth to stifle it.
You were still questioning how the two of you were even together, total opposites from different sides of the school. The King and a bookworm.
You suppose, in a weird way, you could thank the horrors that you had both witnessed over the past two years for bringing you together. But you don't want to give the Upside-Down any credit for your happiness given it was a hell like no other.
You can still remember how much you had disliked him at first, the way he acted, the way he spoke to people, the way he made you feel about yourself. His "friends" had given you hell for years and when he had finally stood up to them and broken up with Nancy, you had seen the better version of Steve Harrington who laughed and smiled and actually cared without any fear of being judged.
As you lie on your back, you cans still feel the gentle press of his hands on your skin, hear the whispered words "Are you sure?". Still feel his face buried in the crook of your neck, hear the hushed laughter when he first appeared over you with a bashful "Hello."
It couldn't have been more perfect and you could smile forever in your new bliss.
You wrestle your way out of the warmth of the bedsheets, grabbing the closest article of clothing to you: his navy sweater from yesterday. The sleeves fall over your hands and you bunch it up in fists as you open the door and walk into the hallway.
Dustin's door is still closed and you creep past, so as not to wake him. He wouldn't quit poking fun at you or Steve if he saw you now so it was better to be safe than sorry to leave him sleeping in. It was the holidays anyway.
You're suddenly startled by the sound of pots and pans crashing against each other, followed by the sound of a terribly hidden string of curses as whoever spilled the contents of the cupboard tried (and failed) to catch them.
When you reach the kitchen door, you can see Steve busy at the stove, pots and pans sitting haphazardly on the counter and floor. Without a word, you lean against the doorframe, arms crossed, and watch him attempt to work the stove. A smile plays on your lips and eventually, you clear your throat quietly to get his attention.
He whips round, only to notice that it's you.
"Morning... again." You murmur softly, still smiling.
God, it was like you slept with a hanger in your mouth or something.
"Morning," He turns away as his cheeks blush bashfully, and you can't help but feel warmth at the thought of making Steve Harrington blush. The thought nearly turns your legs to jelly and you walk over to the stove to keep them working.
You swat his hands away from the buttons with a laugh and stand in his place to turn the stove on, hearing his almost silent "Oh." as you show him how to work it.
His arms snake their way round your middle and his chin falls onto your shoulder, your face heating at the contact. He places soft kisses on your shoulder, then your neck, and you run your hands along his forearms.
"Steve." You feel him hug you tighter at his name and his hum of acknowledgement is disguised by another kiss, "Last night..."
You trail off and he laughs against your neck, moving away to turn you round. His nose scrunches as your hands move to the ends of his hair out of habit and he sways slightly.
"Yeah?" You can tell he's wanting you to talk more and you repress a sigh.
"I just wanted to say I..." You can't seem to finish the sentence as you gaze into his eyes, the whole scene perfectly homely. You didn't want to ruin it with a love confession that might be rejected.
He watches you with curious smirk and you open your mouth to speak again but he cuts you off with a sweet, slow kiss.
Your hands move further into his hair and his pull you closer by the waist. More memories of meaningful kisses and the whispered confessions whilst pressed close together from last night resurface in your mind. The feeling of his hands, his lips, just his touch made your head spin and your forehead falls onto his, not breaking the kiss.
"Oh come on!"
Your brother's voice startles you both and you break apart, Steve keeping a hold of your waist.
Dustin stands in the doorway, his friends lingering in the hallway, awkwardly watching the scene playing out. You feel your face burn and turn to your boyfriend for help, but he seems entirely unfazed.
"A bit of privacy wouldn't kill you, Henderson." Steve grumbles, ignoring the disgust on Dustin's face.
"I live here." Dustin replies matter-of-factly, crossing his arms.
"And..?" You can't help but hold back a laugh at your boyfriend's oblivion and he pulls a face at you which lets the laughter escape.
Dustin pulls a different kind of face, "Well, when you two are finished grossing everyone out, I'd like some pancakes."
You roll your eyes and walk over to him, placing your hands on his shoulders to turn him round. He begins to protest but gives up when you give him a sharp pinch on either side.
"Just go upstairs and do whatever it is you do together there," You give him your most serious look you can muster with a stomach full of butterflies.
"Fine," He stomps up the stairs, "But I'm serious about those pancakes!"
You watch his friends follow him up, quickly noticing the two girls and yell up a quick "Leave the door open!" before turning to return to the kitchen.
Max stops and gives you a look that makes you freeze and eye her curiously.
"Yes?" You ask quietly.
"I was just thinking that the sweater is real subtle." Her eyes move along the sweater and you shift uncomfortably under them.
"I-I don't know what you mean..."
She snorts out a laugh and runs up the stairs.
"Nice hickey, by the way!" She yells after her and you throw a shoe up the stairs that hits her legs.
"Teenagers." You mutter under your breath and turn back to the kitchen to see Steve leaning against the counter, a smirk playing on his pretty lips.
"Want to tell me what's going on in that head of yours, Harrington?" Your voice is quiet and he closes the distance between the two of you in four long strides.
His thumb grazes your chin, pushing your face up to his before he kisses you again, a contented sigh escaping him. Once again, your hands find his messy hair and he grips the sweater with a little more power than before.
"God, I love you." His words are almost hidden against your lips but you freeze and pull away slightly, out of breath from both the kiss and his confession.
A blush creeps up his face and you can't help but smile before giving him another quick peck on his lips, relief filling you.
How can you have thought this man didn't love you enough to say it when he had blushed and grinned the entire morning. You love him to Jupiter and back a thousand times and realise, you had always really known he feels the same.
So, when the words leave your mouth and leave him a blushing mess, you can't help but know that this is your future.
You and him.
"I love you too."
***
A/N
I really hope you liked it and just a reminder that my requests are open via messages so just ping me a message if you have a request for any of the characters from my first post. Thank you! xx
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we should meet steve's parents in st5 but it should be joe keery in a wig and joe keery with a fake beard like in back to the future 2
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Guys it’s me, I’m the demo dog
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People who hate musicals are the weakest links in society. You’re telling me you can go watch a Transformers movie, or a Marvel movie, or any of the Harry Potter movies, but singing and dancing is where you draw the line??? You people are boring BOOOOOOO🍅🍅🍅🍅
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Everything To Me
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summary: Spencer is in love with his coworker and best friend and goes all out to celebrate her birthday on the day after when she catches her boyfriend in bed with another woman when they arrive home from a case.
this is 100% season 1 spencer
warning: cheating, making out, angst/comfort
“(Y/N)! Wait up!” Spencer stumbled, tripping over his feet as he hurried to catch the elevator with his friend. He covered the distance from his desk to the elevator doors in record time as (Y/N) hit the button to presumably hold open the doors for him. He slid in and stood next to her while panting lightly. He really needed to do some cardio, he noted to himself.
“Wow, with speed like that I should start calling you Barry Allen,” she giggled, making Spencer's heart flutter in the best and most terrifying way and drawing a laugh out of his throat (even though he didn’t really get the reference). He couldn't help it when all he could think about was how much he wanted to hear that laugh every day for the rest of his life.
“Sorry,” he flashed a sheepish smile at her and ducked his head a little bit as he felt his cheeks heat up slightly.
“Hey, uh, I was wondering if you had any, uh, any plans for the evening? There’s a Star Trek: The Next Generation marathon and I know that’s your favorite Star Trek series so I was thinking maybe we could hang out and maybe get some takeout?"
"That sounds like it would be a hell of a time," she began. Spencer could already feel the incoming, "but I promised Warren I'd spend the evening with him since it's my birthday and all." Spencer had to keep himself from making a face at the mention of her asshole of a boyfriend, not wanting to upset her, and so instead he opted to skip over that and react to the next part of her statement.
"Wait it's your birthday? Why didn't you say anything? We all would have done something to celebrate before going home today," Spencer started kicking himself internally. How could he not have known today was her birthday? The two of them had become attached at the hip pretty much since she started at the BAU 4 months ago. She had even celebrated his own birthday with him and the rest of the team.
“Hey, it’s okay! You don’t need to feel bad or anything, I tend to just treat my birthday like it’s any other day so I often just don't even tell anyone when it is,” she shot him a sweet smile in an attempt to assure him that it was okay but it didn't make him feel any less guilty.
Spencer's heart sank a bit at the thought of not being able to celebrate (Y/N)'s birthday with her, but he knew Warren was important to her regardless of how much Spencer and the team disliked him. He mustered a smile and nodded, "No worries, spending time with Warren sounds great. Happy birthday, (Y/N). I hope your day is as wonderful as you are."
(Y/N) blushed at the compliment, waving it off modestly. The elevator dinged softly, indicating they had reached the ground floor. As the doors slid open, they stepped out into the bustling lobby of the FBI building. Spencer glanced at his watch and realized it was already late in the evening.
"Well, I should let you get going. Have a fantastic birthday night with Warren," Spencer said, trying to hide his disappointment behind a cheerful facade.
"Thank you, Spencer. I really appreciate it. We should definitely catch that Star Trek marathon another time," she replied with a warm smile before turning to head towards the exit.
Later in the evening, Spencer found himself sitting on his worn-out couch, a container of lukewarm Chinese takeout resting in his lap as he absentmindedly watched reruns of Star Trek. His mind kept wandering back to the encounter in the elevator with (Y/N) earlier that day. The missed opportunity to spend her birthday with her weighed heavily on his heart.
Just as Captain Picard was about to make a diplomatic decision that could change the course of an entire star system, Spencer's phone rang, jolting him out of his thoughts. He glanced at the screen to see (Y/N)'s name flashing brightly.
With a mixture of confusion and worry, he answered the call. "Hey, (Y/N), is everything okay?" His heart clenched at the sound of her quiet sobs on the other end of the line.
"Spencer," her voice cracked, "can you... can you come pick me up?"
Without another word, Spencer sprang into action. "Of course, (Y/N). I'll be right there. Where are you?" Spencer's voice was filled with concern as he quickly grabbed his keys and rushed out the door, leaving behind the half-eaten container of Chinese takeout and the flickering TV screen showing Star Trek.
As he drove through the quiet streets towards (Y/N)'s location, thoughts raced through Spencer's mind. Why was she crying? What had happened? He couldn't bear the thought of her in distress, especially on her birthday.
Finally reaching the spot where she said she would be, Spencer spotted (Y/N) sitting on a bench outside of a sketchy looking apartment complex, her head buried in her hands. He parked the car and hurried over to her, his heart breaking at the sight of her tear-streaked face.
"(Y/N), what's wrong?" Spencer knelt down beside her, gently placing a hand on her back. She looked up at him with red, puffy eyes, and he felt a crack in his chest
as her trembling voice filled the cool night air.
"I... I waited for Warren at my apartment, but he never showed up or called. I got worried and went to his place," she paused, taking a shuddering breath before continuing, "I let myself in with my key, and... and I found him in bed with another woman."
Shock rippled through Spencer as he struggled to process her words. The image of (Y/N) standing in the doorway of Warren's apartment, witnessing such a betrayal, tore at his heart. Anger flared within him, directed not only at Warren but at the unfairness of it all. How could someone as kind and genuine as (Y/N) be treated so callously?
Without hesitation, Spencer pulled (Y/N) into a tight embrace, offering her solace in the warmth of his arms. He felt her tears soak into his shirt as she clung to him, seeking comfort amidst the storm of emotions raging within her.
As she sobbed into his chest he felt tears pricking his own eyes. He gently cupped her head and started stroking her hair in an attempt to soothe her before saying, “let’s get you into the car, okay?”
As Spencer led (Y/N) to his car, he couldn't shake the image of her devastated face from his mind. The weight of her heartbreak hung heavy in the air, suffocating him with a sense of helplessness. He opened the car door for her, watching as she settled into the passenger seat with a heavy sigh.
"I'm so sorry, (Y/N)," Spencer murmured softly as he started the engine, casting a sympathetic glance her way. "You deserve so much better than this."
(Y/N) let out a bitter laugh, devoid of any humor. "I should have known better than to get my hopes up. This is why I never celebrate my birthday. It’s more trouble than it’s worth," she confessed, her voice laced with resignation and nothing more than a whisper by the very end. Spencer's heart clenched at her words. He wanted nothing more than to ease her pain, to show her that she deserved all the love and happiness in the world.
"You deserve to be celebrated, (Y/N)," Spencer said with conviction, his eyes meeting hers in the dim light of the car. "No one has the right to make you feel otherwise. You are kind, beautiful, and deserving of all the love and joy that life has to offer."
Spencer's words echoed in (Y/N)'s mind as they drove through the quiet streets of the city, the soft glow of streetlights casting a serene ambiance over the car. The heaviness of her heart began to lift ever so slightly, buoyed by the sincerity in Spencer's eyes and the comfort of his presence beside her.
As they reached a stoplight, Spencer turned to (Y/N) with a tentative smile. "How about we make a detour?" he suggested gently. "There's this little ice cream shop a few blocks away. Maybe some ice cream might help lift your spirits."
(Y/N) managed a small smile in return, touched by Spencer's thoughtfulness. The simple gesture felt like a ray of sunshine breaking through the storm clouds that had gathered around her heart. "That sounds nice," she replied softly, her voice still tinged with sadness but with a glimmer of gratitude shining through.
They parked near the ice cream shop, its cheerful neon sign beckoning them inside. The bell above the door jingled as they stepped in, greeted by the sweet scent of freshly made waffle cones and a colorful display of ice cream flavors. Spencer guided (Y/N) to a cozy booth by the window, where they could watch the world pass by as they indulged in their frozen treats.
As they savored their ice cream, the heaviness in (Y/N)'s heart began to thaw, melting away with each spoonful of creamy sweetness. Spencer listened attentively as she shared snippets of her favorite childhood memories, her voice soft and wistful against the backdrop of cheerful chatter from other customers.
Once they had finished their ice cream, Spencer suggested another detour. "There's this little vintage store down the street that always has some classic movies on sale. How about we pick up one of your favorites and head back to my place to watch it?”
(Y/N) hesitated before saying, “I don’t know about picking up anything from a store but is that Star Trek marathon still on?” The slight amount of hope in her voice made Spencer’s heart flutter with a mix of relief and warmth. He had been longing for a chance to make her smile, to see a glimmer of happiness light up her eyes once more.
Nodding enthusiastically, he replied, "Absolutely! We can swing by the store another time. For now, let's head straight to my place for that Star Trek marathon." The anticipation in (Y/N)'s eyes was palpable as they made their way to Spencer's cozy apartment. The familiar scent of old books and fresh laundry greeted them as they stepped inside, the soft glow of string lights casting a warm ambiance over the living room.
Spencer turned the TV back on, dimming the lights to create a cozy home-theater atmosphere. They settled on the couch, surrounded by plush pillows and soft blankets, basking in the nostalgic thrill of the sci-fi classic unfolding on the screen.
As the episode played on, Spencer got up and reheated the Chinese food from earlier and putting it on plates for each of them. He grabbed himself a fork and got one of the sets of chopsticks from the restaurant for (Y/N). As he made his way back to the living room he saw (Y/N) happily rocking back and forth as she watched Data and Geordi share another one of their intriguing engineering discussions. Spencer couldn't help but smile at the sight, a flicker of contentment lighting up his own heart as he handed (Y/N) the plate with her food and settled back onto the couch beside her.
Between bites of General Tso's chicken and sips of hot tea, Spencer couldn't help but feel a sense of peace settle over him. The soft glow of the TV cast shadows across the room, creating a cocoon of warmth and familiarity around them. The gentle hum of the spaceship's engines on screen seemed to lull them both into a comfortable silence, broken only by the occasional chuckle or comment about the characters.
After a few episodes, Spencer found himself stealing glances at (Y/N) out of the corner of his eye, admiring the soft curve of her profile as she watched intently. He could see a spark of joy in her eyes, a fleeting moment of escape from the weight of unspoken emotions that lingered between them. Sensing a rare moment of vulnerability, Spencer cleared his throat softly before turning to (Y/N) with a gentle smile.
"Hey, (Y/N)," he began, his voice soft and tentative. "I was wondering... If you could have done anything for your birthday today, what would it have been?"
(Y/N) paused, her gaze shifting from the screen to Spencer. Her expression softened as she considered the question, a faint blush dusting her cheeks. "You know, I've always wanted to visit the Smithsonian," she murmured, her eyes distant with longing. "And maybe the Botanic Gardens too... It's on my list of things to do someday."
Spencer nodded, committing her words to memory as he filed away the simple desires she shared. He made a mental note to himself, silently vowing to make those dreams a reality for her someday.
As they finished the last episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation, Spencer noticed the clock on the wall ticking closer to midnight. With a sense of reluctance, he turned to (Y/N) and said, "I hate to cut this short, but it's getting late. I should call a cab for you."
(Y/N) looked up at him, a mixture of disappointment and understanding in her eyes. She nodded quietly, gathering her things and slipping on her coat. As Spencer dialed for a cab, he couldn't shake off the feeling of missed opportunities hanging heavy in the air.
The subdued sound of the approaching cab echoed through the quiet street outside. Spencer opened the door for (Y/N), his gaze lingering on her for a moment longer than necessary. "I'll be picking you up at 11 am tomorrow so be dressed and ready," he said, surprising both himself and (Y/N) with his sudden declaration.
Confusion flashed across her face as she stammered, "But... why? Where are we going?"
"Just make sure you’re ready,” he smiled, ideas blossoming in his mind as he decided he was going to show her what her birthday meant to him. He closed the cab door behind her and waved as the car drove off before turning on his heel and heading back inside, preparing to show his best friend the time of her life tomorrow.
Spencer woke up at 8 am the next morning to the soft rays of sunlight filtering through the curtains, illuminating his room in a golden hue. Rubbing the sleep from his eyes, he stretched his arms above his head and swung his legs over the edge of the bed. Today was going to be special; he was determined to make it a day that (Y/N) would never forget.
Remembering her mention once that morning glories were her favorite flower, Spencer decided to start by weaving a delicate flower crown out of the vibrant blooms he had picked from his backyard garden. As he carefully intertwined the petals and vines into a crown fit for a queen, he couldn't help but smile at the thought of seeing (Y/N) wear it.
After finishing the flower crown, Spencer's thoughts drifted to a memory she had shared with him long ago. Before her parents had passed away, they used to build her a pillow fort and hang fairy lights in it on special occasions. Determined to recreate that sense of childhood magic for her, Spencer set about constructing a fort in his living room. He gathered every pillow and blanket he could find, stacking them strategically to form the walls of the fort. With a bit of effort and creativity, he managed to fashion an elaborate yet cozy hideaway filled with soft cushions and twinkling fairy lights. His PhD in Engineering was finally seeing some use.
As he stepped back to admire his handiwork, Spencer's heart swelled with a mix of emotions. The soft glow of the lights cast a warm, inviting aura over the fort, creating an atmosphere of whimsy and nostalgia. He could almost picture the look of wonder on (Y/N)'s face when she saw it, and the thought filled him with a sense of anticipation.
With the fort completed, Spencer glanced at the clock and realized it was almost time to pick up (Y/N). Quickly changing into a clean shirt and vest and grabbing the flower crown he had made earlier, he made his way out the door, excitement bubbling in his chest.
As he drove to (Y/N)'s apartment, Spencer's mind was a whirlwind of nerves and anticipation. He parked the car a few blocks away, wanting to give himself a moment to compose himself before their day together began. Taking a deep breath, he stepped out onto the sidewalk and started the short walk to her building.
The street was alive with the sounds of the city waking up - the distant hum of traffic, the chatter of early risers going about their day. But in Spencer's mind, all he could focus on was the image of (Y/N) in his mind, wearing the flower crown he had made for her.
Finally reaching her apartment building, he climbed the steps to her floor, his heart pounding in his chest. Standing in front of her door, he took one last deep breath before lifting his hand to knock.
The sound echoed through the hallway, reverberating in Spencer's ears as he waited with bated breath. After what felt like an eternity, he heard footsteps approaching from inside the apartment. The soft shuffling of footsteps grew louder, and Spencer's pulse quickened in anticipation. Suddenly, the gentle click of the door being unlocked filled the air, and it slowly swung open to reveal (Y/N) standing before him.
She looked breathtaking. (Y/N) was wearing a simple yet elegant dress with cute buttons lining the front and a delicate peter pan collar. Her chin length bob was slightly curved under her chin and her bangs fell across her forehead in such a perfect way and Spencer looked away quickly, his cheeks burning when he realized he was staring. For a moment, they stood there in silence, the air thick with unspoken words and emotions.
Then, Spencer slowly brought forward the flower crown he had hidden behind his back, holding it out towards (Y/N) with a shaky hand. “Happy birthday," he finally whispered, his voice barely above a breath as he nervously offered her the crown. The soft petals of the flowers brushed against her fingertips, and (Y/N)'s eyes widened in surprise and delight as she took the flower crown from Spencer's hand. A small gasp escaped her lips as she held the delicate creation, a mix of awe and gratitude shining in her eyes as she looked up at him.
"Spencer, it's beautiful," she murmured as she gently placed it atop her head, her voice soft with emotion. The sun was just beginning to rise, casting a golden glow that illuminated her features, making her look even more ethereal. In that moment, caught in the gentle morning light, Spencer felt a swell of affection for her that threatened to overwhelm him.
After a beat of silence filled with unspoken words hanging in the air between them, Spencer cleared his throat and offered a hesitant smile. "Are you ready to go?" he asked, his heart beating a little faster at the prospect of spending the day with her.
(Y/N) returned his smile with a nod, her eyes sparkling with anticipation as she looped her arm through his, the flower crown perched delicately on her head. They strolled down the bustling street, the city waking up around them with a cacophony of sounds and scents. Spencer couldn't help but steal glances at (Y/N), her presence beside him filling him with a warmth he hadn't felt before.
Their first stop was a cozy bookshop just across the street from her apartment building. The bell above the door chimed softly as they entered, and the scent of aged paper and ink enveloped them in a comforting embrace. Rows upon rows of books lined the shelves, each one whispering promises of new worlds and adventures.
"Pick out as many as you'd like," Spencer said, gesturing to the endless array of titles surrounding them. (Y/N)'s eyes widened in delight, a soft gasp escaping her lips as she wandered through the aisles, her fingers trailing over spines in search of stories. He watched as she made her way through the shelves until she reached the SciFi/Fantasy and Horror section and begin removing books from the shelves, reading the backs and either adding them to the stack in her arms or placing them back on the shelves.
Spencer couldn't help but admire the way (Y/N) immersed herself in the world of books, her eyes alight with a passion that made her even more enchanting. She moved with purpose, carefully selecting each book as if it held a piece of her soul within its pages. His heart swelled with fondness for her, her love for literature reflecting a depth to her character that he found endlessly captivating.
As (Y/N) returned back to him, her arms filled with a stack of books that seemed to reach towards the sky, she gave him a sheepish smile. "I might have gotten a bit carried away," she admitted, a hint of embarrassment coloring her cheeks. “Could you help me narrow things down a little bit?”
Spencer chuckled softly, his eyes crinkling at the corners in amusement. "No need to apologize. Let's see what treasures you've found," he said, reaching out to take a few books from her arms. Together, they perused the titles she had chosen, discussing the plots and themes. After they had no luck in narrowing down the pile, Spencer scooped them all up into his arms in a stack and began making his way to the checkout stand.
"Why bother narrowing it down?" Spencer's voice was filled with a playful lilt as he carried the stack of books towards the checkout counter, (Y/N) trailing behind him with a smile tugging at the corners of her lips.
"Impressive selection," the bookstore clerk commented as he rung up the stack of books, each title a window into (Y/N)'s interests and desires. (Y/N) beamed at the compliment, her eyes shining with confusion and gratitude as Spencer pulled out his wallet and paid before she could even reach for her own from her bag.
As they left the bookshop, the sun had climbed higher in the sky, casting a warm glow over the crowded streets. The sounds of the city swirled around them—honking cars, lively chatter, and the distant rumble of a passing train. Spencer glanced over at (Y/N) walking beside him, her face illuminated by a soft radiance.
(Y/N) quickly unlocked the door and placed the bags of books onto her dining room table before they walked back outside. Spencer patiently waited as she locked her door before holding his arm out again for her to grab on to as he lead her to his car.
As they arrived at the Smithsonian Air and Space Museum, Spencer's steps were light with anticipation. The air was alive with the promise of discovery, and he couldn't wait to share this world of wonders with (Y/N). The museum loomed before them like a giant treasure trove, its grand architecture a testament to human ingenuity and ambition.
Stepping inside, they were greeted by a vast hall filled with aircraft suspended from the ceiling like metallic birds frozen in flight. (Y/N)'s eyes widened in awe, her gaze flitting from one exhibit to another as Spencer led her through the maze of history and innovation.
"This is the Wright Flyer," Spencer said, pointing towards the iconic biplane that started it all. "It's incredible to think that this simple machine paved the way for all modern aviation."
As they moved deeper into the museum, Spencer's voice became a gentle murmur of knowledge and passion. He regaled (Y/N) with stories of astronauts who dared to venture beyond Earth's atmosphere and the technological advancements that made it all possible. (Y/N) listened with rapt attention, her eyes shimmering with wonder and admiration for both the exhibits and the man beside her.
Each artifact held a story, a piece of history waiting to be unraveled. Spencer's explanations brought life to the static displays, turning them into vibrant tales of human courage and scientific progress. He pointed out the intricate details of each spacecraft, each spacesuit, each photograph, as if they were sacred relics in a grand temple of human achievement.
As they entered the lunar module exhibit, (Y/N) gasped in awe at the sight of the actual spacecraft that had touched the surface of the moon as well as a piece of rock from the moon that was free for visitors to touch. She reached out a hand as if to touch it, but stopped herself, as if afraid to disturb the fragile connection between past and present.
Spencer noticed her hesitation and smiled softly. "It's okay, you can touch it," he encouraged. "Feel the history in your fingers."
(Y/N) tentatively reached out and brushed her fingertips against the cool, pitted surface of the moon rock. A jolt of electricity seemed to pass through her as she made contact, connecting her to a distant world that had once seemed so unreachable. Her eyes shimmered with unshed tears, overwhelmed by the weight of history and the magnitude of human achievement.
Spencer watched her with a mix of admiration and fondness, his heart swelling with a bittersweet ache at the sight of her emotional response. He longed to reach out and comfort her, to share in this moment of vulnerability and connection, but he held back, knowing that some experiences were meant to be felt in solitude.
As they moved on to the space shuttle exhibit, Spencer's voice took on a reverent tone as he explained the intricacies of space travel and the courage of those who dared to venture into the unknown. (Y/N) listened intently, hanging onto his every word as if they were precious treasures. The stories of the astronauts and their daring adventures resonated with her in a way she couldn't quite explain. It was as if each tale of exploration and discovery tugged at something deep within her, awakening a yearning for the stars that had long been dormant.
After exploring the wonders of the cosmos in the Air and Space Museum, Spencer suggested they visit the Museum of Natural History next. (Y/N) eagerly agreed, her curiosity piqued by the promise of delving into the mysteries of the natural world.
The moment they stepped into the museum, a wave of earthy scents enveloped them—the musty aroma of ancient fossils, the fresh green fragrance of preserved plants, and the tangy scent of minerals. (Y/N) took a deep breath, savoring the rich tapestry of odors that surrounded her as they ventured deeper into the exhibits.
Spencer guided her through halls filled with towering skeletons of dinosaurs, exotic taxidermy specimens, and sparkling gemstones that seemed to whisper tales of ancient worlds and forgotten creatures. His voice, now a gentle hum of fascination, wove intricate stories of the natural wonders before them, each exhibit a chapter in the never-ending book of Earth's history.
With every step, (Y/N) felt herself being transported back in time, her senses overwhelmed by the sights, sounds, and scents of a world long gone yet preserved within the walls of the museum. She marveled at the sheer diversity of life that had once inhabited the planet, from the majestic bones of a towering T-Rex to the delicate wings of a butterfly frozen in time.
As they reached the Butterfly Pavilion, (Y/N)'s eyes lit up with childlike excitement. She walked among the lush greenery, her fingers gently trailing over velvety leaves and vibrant petals as she inspected each plant with keen interest. Spencer watched her with a soft smile, his admiration for her knowledge and passion shining in his eyes.
"It’s like stepping into a living kaleidoscope," (Y/N) breathed, her voice hushed with wonder. "Each butterfly and moth, every plant here tells a story of adaptation and survival. Look at this one," she gestured to a plump monarch butterfly sipping nectar from a bright orange bloom, "did you know they migrate for thousands of miles to escape the cold?"
Spencer was happy to listen intently to her spout knowledge that he already held, captivated by the gleam in her eyes and the animated gestures that accompanied each explanation. He found himself falling even more deeply under her spell as she shared her wealth of knowledge, her voice growing more animated with each tidbit of information.
As they wandered through the pavilion, (Y/N) pointed out the intricate patterns on the butterflies' wings, explaining their purpose and significance with a mix of scientific precision and unbridled enthusiasm. Spencer couldn't help but be swept up in her passion, feeling a warmth bloom in his chest at the sight of her so fully immersed in her element. Her rarely used PhDs in Botany and Microbiology shone brightly through her words and actions as she explained the importance of every living thing within the enclosure down to the network of fungal mycelium in the dirt, making Spencer see her in a whole new light. The way she spoke about each species of butterfly or moth, each plant or fungus they saw, showcased not only her expertise but also her deep love and respect for the natural world.
Spencer found himself hanging onto her every word, just as she had done with his tales of space exploration earlier. He admired the way her eyes sparkled with excitement, the way her hands gestured animatedly as if conducting a symphony of knowledge and wonder.
As they reached a secluded corner of the pavilion, (Y/N) knelt down beside a cluster of milkweed plants, her voice soft and reverent as she explained their importance to the monarch butterflies. Spencer watched her intently, a sense of peace settling over him as he observed her in her element. He then checked his watch, his eyes widening in realization as he saw the time. They were going to be late for the dinner reservation he had managed to secure at the new Italian restaurant (Y/N) had been longing to try for months. With a gentle touch on her shoulder, Spencer interrupted her explanation about the symbiotic relationship between the milkweed plants and monarch butterflies.
"(Y/N), as much as I hate to interrupt your fascinating lesson, we should start heading out. We have a dinner reservation," Spencer said apologetically, a hint of regret in his tone.
Startled by the mention of dinner, (Y/N) straightened up, her eyes widening in surprise before a sheepish smile crossed her face. "Oh gosh, I completely lost track of time! I'm so sorry, Spencer. Let's go."
They hurried through the Butterfly Pavilion, their steps quickening as they made their way to the exit. Spencer opened the passenger door for her as they approached his car, and they soon found themselves seated inside as Spencer started the engine. The warmth of the setting sun bathed the interior in a golden glow, casting long shadows across (Y/N)'s face as she fastened her seatbelt. She glanced over at Spencer, her eyes shining with a mix of excitement and anticipation for the evening ahead.
The drive to the Italian restaurant was filled with comfortable silence, the only sound the soft hum of the radio playing a mellow jazz tune in the background. Spencer stole glances at (Y/N) from time to time, admiring how the fading light accentuated her features, casting her in a soft, ethereal glow.
Arriving at the restaurant, they were greeted by the tantalizing aroma of garlic and tomato sauce wafting through the air. The cozy ambiance of the place enveloped them as they were led to their table, nestled in a corner with a flickering candle casting dancing shadows on their faces.
As they perused the menu, (Y/N)'s eyes widened in delight as she scanned the offerings, her excitement palpable. Spencer couldn't help but smile at her enthusiasm, feeling a warmth in his chest that had nothing to do with the romantic candlelight surrounding them. This moment, this simple act of sharing a meal with her, felt like a glimpse into the life he had always wanted but never dared to reach for.
Their conversation flowed effortlessly, filled with laughter and shared stories. (Y/N)'s eyes sparkled with joy as she recounted a hilarious mishap at work, and Spencer found himself hanging onto her every word once again. It was moments like these that made him forget about his own worries and fears, immersing himself in the present moment.
As the waiter brought out their food, the table was soon filled with plates of steaming pasta and fragrant sauces. The first bite sent a burst of flavors dancing on (Y/N)'s tongue, and she couldn't help but close her eyes in bliss. Spencer watched her savor each mouthful, her expression a symphony of delight and contentment. The flickering candlelight played on her face, accentuating the curve of her smile and the sparkle in her eyes.
Spencer's gaze lingered on her, a sense of longing tugging at his heart. He wanted to freeze this moment in time, to etch it into his memory forever. The warmth of the restaurant, the soft glow of the candle, the sound of (Y/N)'s laughter – all of it wove together into a tapestry of perfect happiness.
But beneath the surface of their shared joy, Spencer felt a pang of bittersweet realization. This was just a moment, a fleeting interlude in their lives. Tomorrow, they would return to their separate paths, their separate dreams.
As (Y/N) reached for her glass of wine, her hand brushed against his, sending a jolt of electricity through him. Their eyes met, and in that brief moment of connection, Spencer felt a surge of courage wash over him. As they finished their meals, the waiter returned to their table with a flourish, presenting a tray of decadent desserts that Spencer had secretly ordered while (Y/N) was in the bathroom. A smile played on his lips as he watched her eyes widen in surprise and delight at the unexpected treat.
"Spencer, you didn't have to do this," she murmured, her voice soft with gratitude.
"It's my pleasure," he replied, his tone gentle yet tinged with a hint of nervousness. "Would you like to enjoy it here or take it to go and eat it while watching something?"
(Y/N) hesitated for a moment, her gaze flickering between the cozy restaurant ambiance and the promise of a quiet moment elsewhere. After a brief pause, she decided, "Let's take it to go."
Spencer nodded in agreement and politely requested the bill. As he settled the payment, a sense of resolve settled in him, guiding his actions as they left the restaurant. The cool night air caressed their skin as they walked towards Spencer's car parked just around the corner. He opened the passenger door for her, a gesture that was both chivalrous and intimate.
As they drove through the city streets, (Y/N) couldn't shake off the feeling of curiosity that gnawed at her mind. Why were they headed to Spencer's apartment instead of hers, as she had anticipated? Her thoughts raced, trying to find an explanation for this unexpected turn of events.
Upon arriving at his apartment building, Spencer handed her the to-go boxes with their desserts before unlocking the door. A sense of bewilderment washed over (Y/N) as she followed him inside. Before she could voice her confusion, Spencer moved behind her and gently covered her eyes with his hands, guiding her further into his apartment.
The faint scent of his cologne lingered in the air as (Y/N) let herself be led by Spencer through the dimly lit hallway. Her heart raced with a mix of anticipation and curiosity, her trust in him unwavering as he guided her with careful steps. The soft shuffle of their feet echoed in the corridor, creating a rhythm that seemed to match the beat of her own pulse.
After what felt like an eternity of darkness behind her closed eyelids, Spencer's hands finally left (Y/N)'s eyes, revealing a mesmerizing sight before her. As she blinked away the temporary blindness, a gasp escaped her lips at the magical scene that unfolded in front of her.
The room was transformed into a whimsical wonderland – an elaborate pillow fort stretched across the space, twinkling with fairy lights that cast a warm, inviting glow. Soft blankets cascaded down like waterfalls, creating nooks and crannies that held the promise of cozy comfort. The air was scented with old books, eucalyptus, and lavender, adding to the ethereal atmosphere that surrounded them.
Spencer watched (Y/N) with bated breath as she took in the sight before her. The flickering lights danced across her face, illuminating the awe and wonder reflected in her eyes. It was a moment frozen in time, suspended between reality and a dream.
"Happy birthday, (Y/N)," Spencer's voice was barely a whisper, filled with a vulnerability that he had never dared to show before.
Tears welled up in (Y/N)'s eyes, moved by the effort and thoughtfulness he had put into creating this enchanting surprise. She turned to face him, her heart overflowing with emotions she struggled to put into words.
"Spencer, this is... it's perfect," she finally managed to say, her voice trembling with emotion. She reached out to grasp his hand, holding onto it as though afraid this magical moment would slip away if she let go.
As they settled into the cocoon of blankets and pillows, Spencer grabbed his laptop from his desk and popped a DVD into the disc player. The opening to a movie he had never seen but had heard her talk about multiple times, Clueless, played in the background but all he could do was look at her. Under the twinkling of the fairy lights he could almost swear she had to be a fairy herself. That’s the only thing he could think of that would explain her beauty.
As the movie played on (Y/N) explained to Spencer that it was actually an adaptation of her favorite novel by Jane Austen, Emma, which did little to make him feel the main character was more likeable but watching her happily chatter about the movie filled him with a sense of comfort and affection. This is how it should always be, he thought to himself, wrapping his arms around her as she settled against his chest.
They sat and cuddled in a comfortable silence until it was broken by her voice, soft and timid as she said, “hey Spence?”
“Hm?” He hummed into her hair, his eyes closed.
“Why did you do all of this?” She queried, sounding like she was on the verge of tears, which immediately pulled Spencer from his half asleep haze.
Spencer thought about his next words carefully, taking so long that (Y/N) was about to ask if he had fallen asleep before he finally responded. “After seeing you so heartbroken last night and seeing how Warren just tossed you aside like you didn’t matter I just felt like I should show you how much it means to me that you exist." His voice was gentle, barely a whisper as he confessed the depth of his feelings for her.
(Y/N) felt her breath catch in her throat at his words. The vulnerability in his voice touched her heart in a way she had never experienced before. She turned to look into his eyes, seeing the sincerity and care reflected back at her.
Tears glistened in her eyes as she reflexively leaned into his hand as he reached to cup her cheek, caressing it with a tenderness that spoke volumes. "Spencer," she murmured, her voice filled with emotion, "you didn’t have to—I’m not worth all this—I-I don’t—"
He placed a finger on her lips, silencing her words. "That’s what I’ve spent all day trying to show you, (Y/N). You are worth it. You are worth everything to me," he whispered, his gaze unwavering.
In that moment, (Y/N) felt a rush of emotions swell within her, a mix of disbelief and overwhelming gratitude. Her heart pounded in her chest as she gazed into Spencer's eyes, seeing a depth of love and sincerity that she had never expected to find. The weight of his words hung heavy in the air, wrapping around them like a warm embrace.
As they sat there, suspended in time, (Y/N) felt a gentle tug at her heart urging her to lean forward. She hesitated for a moment, uncertainty clouding her mind as she debated the implications of such a gesture. Could she allow herself to be vulnerable again after everything she had been through? Was it worth risking her heart for the possibility of something more?
But before she could overthink it any further, Spencer's gaze softened even more as he leaned in towards her. In the briefest moment of hesitation, his lips hovered centimeters away from hers, silently asking for permission. And just as he began to pull back, (Y/N) plunged forward, closing the distance between them as she pressed her lips against Spencer's. It was a tender, tentative kiss filled with all the unspoken words and emotions that had lingered between them for so long. The world seemed to stand still as they shared this intimate moment, their hearts beating in harmony.
Spencer was momentarily stunned by the sudden turn of events, but as he felt (Y/N)'s warmth against his lips, all doubts and insecurities melted away. When they finally pulled away, they were both met with flushed cheeks and wide eyes. There was a charged energy in the air, a newfound connection that sparked between them like a flame igniting in the darkness.
"(Y/N)," Spencer whispered, his voice barely above a breath as he searched her eyes for confirmation.
(Y/N) simply smiled, a radiant expression that lit up her face with joy and relief. “I love you, Spencer,” falls from her lips before she crashes them back against his.
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the criminal minds episode where the stripper asks spencer if he has a problem with what she does and he tells her "no, i'm from las vegas" as if that is explanation enough
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im sure lots of people will listen to TTPD and discount it because she talks about matty in it (and ofc people have their valid issues with him, but im not gonna go into that), but the whole lead up to the album has been “we’re investigating,” and imo a lot of us took that as her saying “we’re investigating why her relationship ended” whereas the album is actually about “we’re investigating this caricature of a girl who went through something life-changing, and she has apparently gone crazy” and she’s basically done a public autopsy of herself; something that the media/fans/public have done since the beginning, but this time around she was like “i’ll do it to myself.”
hence, the album aesthetic feels so sterile too imo. she’s trying to distance herself from the subject but!!!!!! she is the subject. and in conclusion, i think what she’s really putting down is “the summary of the investigation of this girl is that she went insane because of what happened to her, but it’s hopefully gonna be okay”
sidenote: i think what we need to take away from the album is to… let her live…
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