averagemisfit03

[averagemisfit03]

[averagemisfit03]

held.

[averagemisfit03]

[averagemisfit03]

[averagemisfit03]

Explain Us

♥ ♥  Joseph Quinn x Fem!Reader

Summary: So, more than flatmates... but, what exactly? Would be fantastic if you would just, you know, talk about it. But communicating is not your strong suit and you're extremely certain that it's fine. Confusing and vague, but, fine.

CW / disclaimer: rpf, fem!reader, a continuation of define close, no need to read it to enjoy this, though it will help! 18+ smut! (just a little! but it's a start!)

Author’s note: "am i gonna have to buy into the concept of sleeping next to him but just kissing?" no :) of course not :))))

Wordcount: 3.2K

part one - part two - part three - part four - part five

Big mistake. Massive error. Huge miscalculation.

Shouldn’t have done that.

Why did you do that?

All the things you wouldn’t even let your own inner monologue sound out were now just... out there. Vocalised into the ether. Swirling around in the air of the flat. The very one where Joe lived too, and maybe they’d end up finding their way into Joe’s ears eventually – not how it worked, you were very aware, but, a new fear had been awakened anyway.

Fuck.

You shouldn’t have told her.

And it was Joe’s fault too!

Not really. But, sort of. You were blaming him for all of it, anyway. If he hadn’t decided that your friend being out of the room for just a second was enough time to let hands wander, she would never have seen. Would never have given you that look. Would never have asked you the question you knew she was keeping inside of her mouth until Joe’d left.

“So... what’s going on with you and Joe?”

Breathe, you stupid bitch. Remain calm.

“Nothing.”

It was silly how fast you cracked. An eye-roll and a pointed look later had you bashfully confess that, yea all right, there was something going on with you and Joe. You just didn’t really know if you could explain it properly.

“The way you quickly stepped away from him when I walked back in, I fucking knew something was up. Try me.”

“No, but it’s really complicated...”

“I said, try me.”

And well. Turns out, in a huge what-the-fuck moment, it wasn’t at all that complicated actually. You told her that you and Joe got cosy and watched films a lot. Cuddled up and fell asleep on each other on the daily. Slept in the same bed a lot. All the time, now, actually, because it was just nicer than sleeping alone. But you weren’t like, together or anything.

You rambled.

And your friend watched you in silence.

And, yea sure, sometimes you kissed, but it was like, you know, how friends kiss each other sometimes. Quick pecks. Like stage kisses. Joe was an actor. It didn’t really mean anything.

“You... you kiss like friends kiss?”

“Yea,” you shrugged, picked a little bit of food of a forgotten dinner plate to appear more casual about all of it. To really sell that it wasn’t a big deal to you.

“Or like, how you’d kiss a parent, you know?”

Your friend watched you a second, and then challengingly went, “All right. Kiss me like you’d kiss Joe.” before leaning over a little in her seat, ready for a smooch.

And then you paused, and you shouldn’t have. The pause gave everything away. It made your friend burst out laughing instantly.

“You don’t kiss like friends do!” she accused, but you were already wiping your hands and reaching for her face. You could plant one smacker right on her lips to convince her of your innocence if you had to. Sure. Why not.

“No, come here, I’ll show you.”

“Ew fuck off,” she laughed. “Next you’ll finger me on the sofa.”

And–

Um.

What?

Your friend was about to go for a sip of her drink when she saw your face, and then lowered her glass as her eyes grew to twice their size.

“Oh no, you’ve let him finger you on the sofa?”

You had.

You fucking had.

But you weren’t going to fucking tell her.

You felt heat flush your face, and shut the fuck up, you could not blush in front of her. She'd know! Your panic made her exclaim your name loudly, like she couldn’t believe what the fuck this well of information she’d just fallen into even was. But there was a wild joy there too. Like she was loving this obvious mess of a weird relationship you had with your flatmate, and was so excited to be discovering all of these crazy secrets.

You didn’t blame her.

“No,” you started, trying to be as convincing as you could. “I’ve not let him fi–” her laugh interrupted you, and you didn’t like how contagious it was. You tried again, trying to speak over your own and her laughter, “He has not fingered me on the sofa.”

He had.

“Oh?”

“... what?”

“Not on the sofa? But, elsewhere, he has?”

That too.

“Stop it!” you exclaimed, getting up to clear the table. “Of course he hasn’t, we’re flatmates for fuck’s sake!”

A pair of eyes narrowed at you in suspicion.

“You sure?”

“Oh, my God. Imagine if I wasn’t?” You laughed, and she laughed with you. It deflated the tension you felt in your gut from lying by just enough to keep the nervous sweat from your brow.

You diverted the attention to different things quite quickly, and your friend soon dropped the whole ordeal, what with it being obvious that it was clearly making you uncomfortable. Your adamant denying was no fun to listen to anyway.

But something nagged at you.

Why had she immediately assumed there was more to you and Joe and then... didn’t seem all that fussed?

Well, she did seem fussed. But she also didn’t.

She hadn’t even asked if you liked him. If you were into Joe like that. Like it wasn’t really a huge deal.

Which, yea, she was right, because it wasn’t. You’d been telling yourself it wasn’t. Spent a lot of time convincing yourself that it wasn’t.

But how come it took her only two seconds to agree with you before she swiftly carried on talking about her own problems?

It bothered you more than you let on, and it kind of simmered on in the back of you mind for the rest of the evening. Kept you staring into space and not really listening to whatever she was telling you. Had you almost consider confessing that, actually, you lied and Joe had fingered you on the sofa. Big whoops. And right where she was sitting, too.

It kind of gradually happened a couple weeks ago and you hadn’t talked about it afterwards.

Of course you hadn’t.

You never talked.

But you should have.

Not that you’d know what to say.

What would you even say?

Thank you?

You’d done that once, and Joe had been all weird after.

You didn’t talk going into anything, and you didn’t talk after. And it had all been fine up until... well, now, probably.

No.

Actually... it was still fine.

Right?

You were just flatmates who did things sometimes. No judgement. Just in the moment enjoyment and comfortability. A natural fluidity that had just grown between the two of you over time.

You tried to shake it off as you got ready for bed in Joe’s bedroom on your own. Joe was still out. Would be for a little while too. Night shoot, or a party, something. Whatever. You’d not paid attention because your heart had been in your throat as he explained where he was going. Your friend had just seen the two of you jump apart in the kitchen when she walked back in, and so focusing on whatever information Joe was giving you was a little too big of an ask.

But then you couldn’t shake it off.

Because even though Joe had made the comment that his bed had started smelling of you now, Joe’s bed still smelled of Joe to you, and now every single thing that had lingered in the back of your mind got hurled right into the forefront.

That day.

That first time.

You’d been in such an awful mood that day. Ended up having to work late to rectify mistakes others had made, and then, when you finally got home, were met by a full sink of dishes in the kitchen, dirty plates and glasses on the counter right next to it. There was evidence of Joe having started trying to tidy it all up, but then clearly, he hadn’t finished the job.

When you opened the dishwasher you knew why.

It was full of clean but still wet dishes that he hadn’t wanted to towel dry before putting it all away.

Great.

Sometimes having a flatmate was great.

Other times, it was really fucking annoying.

“Joe?” you called, using a dirty fork to check if any of the dishes inside of the sink were yours.

“Yea?”

He was reading something aloud in his bedroom when you’d walked in, and you knew you were interrupting him as he did his job. But, fuck it. None of these dishes were yours.

“Would you mind not being the worst flatmate tonight?”

Harsh. But Joe jogged in and knew exactly what you meant, “Yea, sure, in a second. Look what I got!”

In a second.

Ugh.

Joe walked over to the TV and then stepped aside to reveal a small plant.

You gave it a dry stare before sarcastically commenting, “Wonderful.” and turning around to begrudgingly start on the dishes yourself.

“What? You were saying how this area needed some greenery, did you not?” Joe touched one of the green leafs proudly. He really thought he picked a good one.

“Yea,” you scoffed. “But I meant like, a big palm for in the corner, or one of those, I don’t know, huge monstera ones, with the big leafs, that can grow up to the ceiling.” You complained. Loved complaining for a second. Really enjoyed swimming in negativity as you fished all dirty dishes from the sink and placed them with the plates and glasses on the side.

“Yea, I guess that would be more impressive than this,” Joe said softly, still looking at the little asplenium. He’d picked the pot himself too, and the lady said that the small plant was called crispy wave and wasn’t that just exactly the right description for it too? “But we could do both. We could still get a larger one for next to it. And then it’ll have a buddy.”

You barely heard Joe over the clattering of cutlery in the sink.

“Hey, I said I’d do that in a second,” Joe finally zoned back in after a particular loud clang and made his way over.

“Yea but I didn’t ask you to not be the worst flatmate tonight in a second, though, did I? Have to do everything in this fucking place.”

You didn’t. You knew that. But it was negativity hours and Joe was just going to have to understand you didn’t mean half the shit you were going to be moaning about.

You pushed dishes aside on the counter to make room for a handful of forks and knives whilst Joe got his hands on your shoulders, doing his best to carefully move you aside.

“Let me–”

“No, you’ll just–”

The loud smash of a glass to tile interrupted you. Slipped right off the edge of the counter. It was one of Joe’s nicer ones. One that looked like a vintage tumbler – it wasn’t actually vintage – that he kept out on display on one of the shelves.

The both of you just stared at it for a second, and then you decided that you couldn’t actually deal with any of the mess. The dirty dishes. Joe’s stupid small plant. The broken glass. Shards all over the kitchen floor.

So you just, left.

Turned around and walked right into the hallway.

Left Joe alone to deal with the ramifications of which you would argue were his own doing.

Shouldn’t have left all this mess.

Shouldn’t have all of his friends over for lunch just because he could.

Shouldn’t have used his nice tumblers.

And people at work shouldn’t be such fucking idiots.

The universe was awful and everyone could die.

There.

But then, before you’d even walked into your bedroom, you’d already decided it was actually all your fault, and Joe’d done nothing wrong, and you were going to get him a new tumbler.

You took a minute to breathe. To sit within your feelings. Wiped a stupid tear from your eye before it could fall down. Changed into something more comfortable and raked a brush through your hair in an attempt to detangle the day out of it.

When you walked back into the living area, Joe was stood hunched beside the counter, probably inspecting the floor for bits of forgotten glass, which was... just perfect.

You walked over in silence and then simply just, climbed on board. Slung your arms around his neck and let your full bodyweight sink onto his back as you pulled your knees up and around his sides.

“Hey, wha–”

Joe nearly lost his balance and shot one hand out to a cabinet to keep himself steady whilst the other one grabbed onto one of your arms.

“What’s going on? Everything okay?”

Your chest tightened at how worried and sincere he sounded.

Joe stood up straight, and got both his arms around your legs to keep you in place on his back.

“I’ll replace it.” you murmured.

“The glass?”

Joe felt you nod against the side of his head as you cheek pressed against one of his ears.

“Ah, s’just a glass, don’t worry about it.”

“And your plant’s cute.”

It was as close to an apology as he was going to get from you. Joe felt you sigh against him and he turned his head in an attempt to look at you.

“Have you eaten?” he asked softly.

You had. Stupid tesco’s meal deal at your desk. You understood why he asked though.

“Mhmm.” you confirmed.

“Good. You ready for dessert?”

Joe let you hold onto him, but it quickly became impossible to stay in your piggyback position. You nearly choked him as you attempted to stay on, but you slid off when he started emptying the dishwasher.

You both laughed, and then you snorted, and then you both laughed at how you’d snorted.

Joe’d gotten little pots of chocolate mousse, the cheap stuff that your mother used to pretend was a special dessert for special occasions only which you believed until you were a teenager. Felt silly now, but they still felt a little special. You had yours sat at the island whilst you watched Joe clean the kitchen.

Got to stare at how his muscles moved underneath his white T-shirt.

How his hands moved as he grabbed onto things.

His fingers.

When Joe closed the loaded dishwasher and turned around, he was met with his flatmate’s half-lidded eyes. His flatmate who had her head propped up in a hand, who had her spoon hanging from her mouth.

Joe theatrically spread his arms out and gave a little bow.

“There. All tidy. Not the worst flatmate tonight.”

He truly wasn’t.

Even if he’d left the mess for what it was.

Joe didn’t even need to suggest spending the rest of the night on the sofa together. It’s where you naturally migrated to as you had your last spoonful of dessert and he wiped down the counters to really finish off the job.

You’d sat down first, and when Joe let himself fall into the cushions beside you, he leant into you a little and stuck his chin out. When you just looked at him a second, he tapped his cheek with a finger, asking for a little thank you kiss. It instantly made you grin.

It was stupid how large the shift in your mood was from when you’d walked in earlier.

But look at him!

All... cheeky and cute.

It was kind of impossible not to cheer up just by being around him.

And cheeky was right, because when you easily gave in and went to press a kiss to his cheek, Joe turned his head at the last moment and got you right on the lips.

You gasped, said his little plant wasn’t that nice, which made him laugh loudly, head thrown back and eyes squeezed shut.

Making Joe laugh like that was different. Made you feel all giddy and secretly proud as you got comfortable in your little spot on the sofa.

“All right, I’ll move it to where you won’t have to look at it all the time.” Joe joked. You frowned, asked, “Where?” because the flat wasn’t that big. You’d see it all the time no matter where it would be.

“I don’t know,” Joe said, moving a throw pillow and stuffing it behind his back. “Your bedroom, maybe.”

Oh.

Yea, all right.

“Fuck off.”

You gave Joe a deadpan stare as he giggled, far too happy with his own little joke.

Even though lighthearted and sort of adorable, that got a little too close to acknowledging what you were doing.

You didn’t talk.

Well, you talked, but never about it. And you liked it that way.

Once you and Joe got close, you kind of didn’t want to stay away anymore. Speaking thoughts, and feelings, and rational musings into the air might make you decide on silly shit like, maybe you shouldn’t anymore.

Maybe you shouldn’t have Joe squeeze a hand in between your legs just above your knees for comfort.

Maybe you shouldn’t get cosy and rub your cupid’s bow against his bicep as Joe flicked through channels.

Maybe you shouldn’t so readily accept kisses pressed into your hair, and maybe you shouldn’t hum to them either. Close your eyes to them. Tip your head back to look Joe in the eye and kiss him on the mouth after.

Maybe you shouldn’t let Joe snake an arm across your waist and tuck his fingers into the elastic waist band of your joggers as you lazily make out on the sofa for a bit.

What you definitely shouldn’t have done, was nudge closer and open your legs a little as you felt Joe’s fingers press into the skin just above your underwear.

Shouldn’t have nodded when Joe rested his forehead against yours for a second and whispered a breathy, “Yea?”

Shouldn’t have gasped as Joe touched you over your underwear first.

Absolutely shouldn’t have moaned as Joe moved fabric aside.

Shouldn’t have whispered his name when you noticed how he was biting back his own groans.

Shouldn’t have redirected his thumb when it wasn’t really in the right spot, and then really shouldn’t have shuddered when it found exactly the right spot.

But it had happened.

And then you didn’t talk after.

Should have.

Didn’t.

And then it happened a bunch more.

Shouldn’t have.

But did.

And now your friend sort of knew, and why the fuck had she not reacted in the way that you thought she would react? Was this not a huge deal?!

You laid in Joe’s bed, in one of Joe’s T-shirts, surrounded by Joe’s things, and, no. It was all too much. And he wasn’t even there.

For the first time in weeks you decided to leave Joe’s bed for what it was and go across the hall to find your own to sleep in.

It felt a little like getting into a hotel bed. Not quite like your own, but comfortable none the less.

The last thing you saw before you switched off the lights was that stupid little plant that Joe had put on your dresser.

Big mistake.

Shouldn’t have done that.

---

The Taglisted

@ali-in-w0nderland, @alwayslindie, @babybluebex, @bylermaxmayfield, @capricornrisingsstuff, @chaoticgood-munson, @choke-me-eddie, @demonsanddemogorgons, @did-it-work, @dirtyeddietini, @djoseph-quinn, @dolcevit4, @eddies-puppet, @emma77645, @emotionaldreamer, @everythinghasafacee, @figmentofquinn, @ghost-proofbaby, @ghostinthebackofyourhead, @hanahkatexo, @harringtonfan4, @hazelenys, @jewellethief, @joesquinns, @keikoraven, @kennedy-brooke, @lovelyblueness, @manda-panda-monium, @mandyjo8719, @mexicanfolklore, @miserybeans, @munson-mjstan, @nadixq, @nglharry, @notverywise, @pepperstories, @phyllosilicate-s, @royale1803, @sherrylyn628, @sidthedollface2, @songforeddiemunson, @sweetberry47, @take-everything-you-can, @thebellenouvelle, @tlclick73, @werepartnersnow, @winterwakesthewolf, @witchwolflea, @yelyahcardella, @yunirgo

taglist currently full, sorry

[averagemisfit03]

Explain Us

♥ ♥  Joseph Quinn x Fem!Reader

Summary: So, more than flatmates... but, what exactly? Would be fantastic if you would just, you know, talk about it. But communicating is not your strong suit and you're extremely certain that it's fine. Confusing and vague, but, fine.

CW / disclaimer: rpf, fem!reader, a continuation of define close, no need to read it to enjoy this, though it will help!

Author’s note: oh, we back with the seasons? yeh, we back with the seasooonns! you've asked for more of the flatmates-who-dont-communicate-but-touch-a-lot, and clearly, there's more to unpack, so, enjoy!

Wordcount: 2.6K

part one - part two - part three - part four - part five

Sometimes you’d forget that you could get a healthy dose of affection without an underlying issue being present. Or at least, the pretence of one. You didn’t need to be upset, real or fake, for it anymore. Could just hug and squeeze and kiss whenever you wanted to.

God, the kissing.

You’d be greeted into your flat with kisses now.

But before, you’d only tangle together when something was wrong.

When your chest would feel tight with emotion and your brain would feel frazzled from lack of sleep. Or lack of food. Or lack of just... overall healthy emoting, because you’d keep all frustrations and worries inside for too long.

But old habits died hard, didn’t they?

And you weren’t alone. Joe would sometimes forget too.

He’d forget that sometimes the two of you could just eat pizza for dinner without this weird hunger to wrap arms around you until all of you was hidden from the world. That you could simply watch a film without the unmanageable need to be protectively connected at the hips.

Joe could pick you up only to throw you onto the sofa, and you’d be so happy to spend the evening there with him. To doze off all sunken into his side, preferably pulled into him tightly, an arm around your back, a big palm spread across your shoulder. Wake up hours later with your fist loosely curled around two of his fingers, your top ridden up from where Joe snuck a hand under, and with legs intertwined to trap the warmth there.

He no longer needed to get you all sulky for that.

But you know what?

It was nice to forget.

It was nice to feel a soft palm press to the small of your back before it would curl around, a low voice asking, “Hey, you okay?” when you’d innocently suggest just ordering a pizza because you couldn’t be bothered cooking tonight.

The temptation to immediately let yourself slide into your feelings was always huge. If Joe was asking, already halfway into curling his whole self around you, who were you to tell him that, oh no, you were absolutely fine, just didn’t feel like cooking, like you said.

It was way nicer to take the opportunity. To sink into your feelings a second and use the moment to unload.

And maybe it had become a subconscious thing, you know?

If you wanted overwhelming soft affection from your flatmate slash kind of... more than flatmate – you’d not spoken about what the fuck this was yet – you wouldn’t even knowingly do it. Your body would take over and you’d suddenly crave pizza. Like a weird sort of cause-and-effect, action-reaction sort of thing. Second nature.

Not just from you.

Joe knew that there were certain ways to look at you for a second too long that would pull tears to your waterline.

He could softly ask, “What’s going on, right now? What’s wrong?” whilst hugging you from behind, nose pushed into your neck, soft lips catching the skin just below it.

Manipulative?

Perhaps.

And completely unnecessary too. But, it was just easier if there was an excuse. If you felt like you deserved a little taking care of. If Joe felt like he was needed at home a little more than he was needed anywhere else.

The first time Joe kissed you, it was just that.

A kiss that felt like it had been a long time coming.

Soft lips brushing, mouths gliding, hands holding your face in palms so big, half his fingers disappeared into your hair around your ears. You had to hold onto his wrists for dear fucking life, scared that the moment would pass too fast and you’d pretend it never happened.

You were stood in the kitchen, socks getting wet from the ice that you’d accidentally scraped from the freezer when you pulled a drawer out with too much vigour.

Joe held your head in his hands and slowly kissed you for what felt like ages. Kissed you like you were made of glass. All tender, almost careful. Lips softly brushing to remember what every single bit of skin felt like.

Every time you thought he was going to pull back, your grip on him strengthened and he’d remain right where he was.

Close.

He kissed you like that until your throat made an involuntary little noise that made you stifle a giggle. Joe felt that giggle, and couldn’t help the smile that overtook his own lips. Twin smiles then pressed together until you could no longer hold the giggles inside, and you freely let them flow into Joe’s mouth, finally breaking the kiss.

Joe let you laugh and pressed his cheek against one of your eyebrows with fondness, keeping you close, his face split by his own huge grin.

“What’s so funny?” Joe asked, his own giggles audible in the back of his throat.

You didn’t have an answer. It was just that the air felt lighter, somehow.

He pulled back and you caught a glimpse of him before he moved back in, trying to steal more kisses. It was a little unfair how Joe just became more attractive with kiss bitten lips, his eyes all glassy. You imagined you looked a right mess. You felt a right mess, anyway. Sort of dizzy, and a little delirious as you tried to grasp the concept of Joe, your flatmate, kissing you.

Joe was kissing you.

Joe wanted to kiss you.

He wanted to kiss you and was then just, doing it.

Well, he tried to, at least. But your frame was shaking with dizzied chuckles, and all Joe got was a stretched corner of your mouth, and then just, teeth. You were difficult to kiss when you got like this, but, God, it was really fucking cute. It was the kind of laughter that felt sticky, laughter you couldn’t seem to shake, so Joe moved his mouth elsewhere, not at all done kissing you yet.

Joe left soft kisses in a trail. Your cheek first, then your jaw, your neck, and then your shoulder over your shirt. His hand moved to grab onto yours and he held it out to the side so he’d get full access all the way down your arm until he reached your palm. The meat of your thumb. The skin just underneath where your fingers began.

Joe pressed soft kisses there until he heard how your breath hitched, and his eyes shot up to look at you. You could hardly bare to make eye-contact at all – this was too soft, my God.

Joe saw.

Felt how he was likely pushing his luck a little with hand kisses. Silly. That shouldn’t be more intimate than what you’d just done, but he understood it was likely a little different to be witnessing the affection with your own eyes.

He needed to get you where you were always most comfortable.

Where you shared intimacy so easily, no questions asked.

Where there was a screen to stare at, to distract your eyes from where hands caressed and fingers swirled.

Joe took two steps before the hand that you were still holding pulled you along, and before you knew it, you’d been dragged over to the sofa where Joe sat down right in the corner. In exactly the best spot. Where he could feel the sofa curl around both his shoulders. And then he let his legs fall open, outstretched with his feet hanging just over the edge, creating the perfect little spot for you to sit.

Which you then did. You sat, with your back pressed against Joe’s front.

Joe turned the TV on, and without anything else said, you shifted until you were all snug. All sheltered. Lower half hidden underneath a throw blanket, top half hidden underneath Joe’s arms that curled around.

Familiar territory.

It took you a second to fully relax this time though, to ease out of your giggles, but you managed to just fine when Joe pressed soft kisses to the top of your shoulder. At first, over your shirt, until an impatient hand snuck around and attempted undoing buttons.

You helped and unbuttoned until you could slip that shoulder out.

Then you watched TV together, and Joe kept his mouth pressed to the warm skin of your shoulder, because that was something he got to do now. Get his mouth places. Rest it where he wanted. Rub it along supple skin where his facial hair would tickle and scratch until he could see your skin grow irritated.

He’d kiss it better immediately.

He would kiss you better every time you’d ask him to.

And also when you wouldn’t ask.

When there’d be nothing to kiss better, he’d still kiss it better. Because he could do that now.

That was another new flatmate-thing that got added to the list, and yea, maybe he should actually tell a friend that he would sometimes kiss his flatmate silly.

And that she actually never really slept in her own bed anymore.

But how would he even begin to explain it?

How would he explain that you moved around your flat like you were a couple that just wanted to reach to touch when they’d pass each other in the kitchen. That would find each other for a quick squeeze when you’d walked in at the end of the day.

He didn’t even know how to explain it to himself.

But when he heard you come in and called a loud, “Hey!” from the sofa, already excited and making space for you there, how could worry not shoot straight into his veins when all he got in reply was teeth chattering.

Yea, it was a little cold out. A bit windy. Joe’d been out to get himself a nice coffee made by someone else earlier, he knew how cold it was.

But then you appeared with wet hair, cheeks red, lips tinted blue and, what the fuck had happened?

“Oh my G– Jesus, you look like you’re frozen!”

Joe was up on his feet already. He’d never seen your body so rigid, all stiff, shoulders pulled all the way up to your ears.

“I am fr-rozen.”

Joe stopped right in front of you and reached for both of your hands. Without thinking, he tucked them underneath his armpits, into the warm fabric there, and squeezed his upper arms close to his body. Your hands were also wet. Was it raining?

“Is it raining?”

“N-no,” you shivered, having great difficulty speaking, and it made Joe’s chest ache. “A bus dr-rove through a b-big puddle, splash-shed me,”

Joe frowned. That couldn’t have gotten you this wet.

“And then– you know the shortcut through the,” you stopped to forcefully exhale, needing the extra focus on your ribcage to make sure you were breathing properly still.

Joe knew which shortcut you meant. Little park that was usually gated closed. When open, it really cut a significant amount of time from your walk home. Didn’t lead you past the shops, but got you home so much faster.

Joe nodded, and moved a little closer to be able to get your face into his hands whilst still making sure you didn’t move yours.

“S-slipped,”

“You fell?”

“I fell.”

You’d not just fallen. You were already wet from the splash a few streets back, and then in your bid to get home quicker, you thanked a God you didn’t believe in when you saw the little gate to the park was open. You dashed through, took one step – one step – onto the unpaved path and misplaced your foot, somehow. You slipped through a puddle, fell sideways onto a hip, your trench ruined, your phone screen cracked, and the muscles and tendons in your leg screamed just as loud as the pain in your hands from where you tried to catch yourself.

You’d taken a real-life comedy-film tumble in cold windy weather and had turned right back around after slowly getting back onto your feet. Fuck that shortcut. It was not to be trusted. That did mean that you had to take the long way home. And thus, why you were fucking freezing right now.

Joe rubbed his thumbs over your blushing cheeks and then leant closer to plant little kisses there.

His warm lips to your cold cheeks made you shudder.

“You need to get out of these clothes,” Joe cooed, already feeling his chest fill up with the knowledge that he’d get to care for you all night. And he was right, about the clothes, but you didn’t want to move your hands. And Joe was kissing your cheeks until they burned. He could hardly blame you for not moving.

Which was good. Joe didn’t actually want you to move.

“Take a hot shower,”

“Mhmm,” you closed your eyes and tensed your jaw, trying your best to make your teeth stop chattering.

“Put some warm, dry, comfortable clothes on after,”

“Yea,”

“I’ll throw these into the washer,” Joe moved a hand down to tug on the wet trench coat you were still wearing. “And order a pizza.”

You would’ve whimpered had Joe not quickly moved on from your cheeks to planting kisses right onto your purple lips.

Just a few.

Just to warm them up.

To kiss them better.

Yea, there was no way any of his friends weren’t going to shit on him if he tried explaining any of this.

Not a chance.

It wasn’t like you were telling any of your friends, either.

You couldn’t even vocalise your own feelings to yourself, let alone explain why you’d started allowing yourself to seek Joe out to kiss him for a second.

Why you’d started allowing Joe to kiss you for however long he felt fit.

Why you’d nearly cried in the shower when Joe called and asked what topping you felt like having.

Why you’d ignored your own wardrobe and had instead gone straight to his to find some soft old joggers and one of his T-shirts to wear.

Why you smiled to yourself when he called, “What’s taking you so long? Hurry up!” from the living room.

And why you walked in, rubbing your own arms, because yea, the shower had warmed you up plenty, but getting out and getting dressed had still left you with goosebumps. Why Joe’d jokingly lifted the hem of his hoodie when you walked over, and why you’d not even hesitated for a second when you just wormed your way up in there.

Why you let Joe squeeze you inside of his hoodie until it was getting a little too hard to breathe in there.

Joe kissed you right on the tip of your nose once you emerged, hair wild, cheeks flushed with heat, and you smiled. Were handed a slice of pizza and fucking beamed. Had a bite and watched Joe take one too. Chewed and smiled, and easily let Joe’s hand find yours to intertwine fingers with.

A funny full-mouthed pizza-flavoured kiss followed that made you laugh.

God, you had the best flatmate.

You knew if you told a friend you’d just spent ten minutes in between the layers of Joe’s T-shirt and hoodie, which tangled up your hair and only made the room feel colder once you slunk back out, you’d get asked all sorts of questions.

None of which you could answer.

None of which you wanted to answer, really.

So you just sat. Touched, ate, and kissed. Slept in the same bed. Made him wake up to your alarm five times a week.

You cuddled, snuggled, pressed soft kisses to funny places like the inside of elbows, and found comfort in a place where only couples found comfort.

Yet, you weren’t a couple.

Were you?

No.

You were flatmates.

Just. Flatmates.

Right?

---

The Taglisted

@ali-in-w0nderland, @alwayslindie, @babybluebex, @bylermaxmayfield, @capricornrisingsstuff, @chaoticgood-munson, @choke-me-eddie, @demonsanddemogorgons, @did-it-work, @dirtyeddietini, @djoseph-quinn, @dolcevit4, @eddies-puppet, @emma77645, @emotionaldreamer, @everythinghasafacee, @figmentofquinn, @ghost-proofbaby, @ghostinthebackofyourhead, @hanahkatexo, @harringtonfan4, @hazelenys, @jewellethief, @joesquinns, @keikoraven, @kennedy-brooke, @lovelyblueness, @manda-panda-monium, @mandyjo8719, @mexicanfolklore, @miserybeans, @munson-mjstan, @nadixq, @nglharry, @notverywise, @pepperstories, @phyllosilicate-s, @royale1803, @sherrylyn628, @sidthedollface2, @songforeddiemunson, @sweetberry47, @take-everything-you-can, @thebellenouvelle, @tlclick73, @werepartnersnow, @winterwakesthewolf, @witchwolflea, @yelyahcardella, @yunirgo

taglist currently full, sorry

[averagemisfit03]

Morning Light

A blurb within the I Was Born to Love You Universe...

A gracev0609/ @losfacedevil collaboration.

There's so much more we want to share, periodically we will be releasing short scenes just like this one.

The sun had just started to break, sending pink rays through the gauzy sheers in your bedroom. Your eyes fluttered open, a rosy hue filled the room, and you were aware of your partner, Y/N, sleeping on your chest. Nuzzling your face in her hair you inhaled the scent of your lover, feeling a soft warmth spread in your chest, the feeling of love and contentment. You pressed soft kisses on her head and you felt her stir, lazily she pressed a kiss to your skin before falling asleep yet again. You didn't mind, it was too early for her to be awake yet anyway. Her body still sore and slightly swollen from birthing your daughter, she deserves her rest. Your gaze moves from your love to your Sunshine. 

It took you one night from her arrival to move her crib from her nursery to your bedroom, you were going to be up with her anyway, and it made you feel better that you could keep an eye on her.

For the time being your daughter was still sleeping, if you looked hard enough you could see the rise and fall of her tiny chest. You thought about how perfect she was, how the two of you created something so beautiful and magical. You were so hopelessly in love, she was your everything. Before now you had never experienced a love so deep, it hurt if you thought about it too hard.

Y/N stirred in your arms again, placing another soft kiss to your chest, and you ran your fingers over the soft skin of her back. She shivered and pressed herself closer to your body. She mumbled a soft,” I love you,Josh.” 

“I love you baby. You can sleep some more, I'm going to get up and get her bottle ready. She'll be awake any moment now.”

She slid off of your body and you pulled the comforter further up and over her body.

Muffled into her pillow you heard her say,” Your such a good daddy Josh.”

Your heart swelled in your chest and a soft smile appears as you quietly slip out of bed, heading to your closet to put on sweats.

Looking for a clean zip up hoodie you made a mental note to order more, they were perfect for your early morning routine with Halina. You fed her, burped her,changed her, and then snuggled her against the skin of your chest. Pulling the zipper up, so most of her body was covered in the fabric as she dozed off with a full belly. 

As you padded your way to the kitchen a smile graced your lips, out of all of your various morning rituals you've had over the years, this was your favorite. You had gone through numerous waves of life, hurrying out the door to grab a coffee on the way to classes, waking up in the afternoon with hangovers, rising early to smoke and meditate, to now enjoying the sunrise with your daughter.

You grabbed a fresh bottle and a container of breast milk out of the fridge and began preparing it. Once warmed to perfection you made your way back to your bedroom, bottle in one hand and a mug of coffee in the other. Setting the drinks down on your nightstand you peered into the crib to find your Sunshine awake and wiggling.

“Hi my Sunshine. Good morning. Daddy got you breakfast, are you hungry?”

You whispered as you picked her up and cradled her. You sat back down on your side of the bed, scooting yourself backwards until your back rest against the mountain of pillows.

Getting her situated in your arms you whispered,” See your Mama knew that they would come in handy for something. She's so smart.”

Bringing the bottle to your newborn's face, you smiled when she easily latched onto the nipple. A sense of pride filled you when you helped your daughter feed, it had only been a week since she was born and you thought she was doing amazing already. 

Soon enough she was slowing down, quickly getting full.

After burping her you said,“Alright love, let's get you changed and into a new outfit. I'm thinking of your yellow onesie with the smiley suns.”

You changed your daughter with care, making sure she was clean and dry before wrapping her up in her onesie.

You grabbed your now lukewarm coffee and took a large gulp before getting back into bed.

You reclined back into the pillows and unzipped your sweatshirt, tucking Halina's little legs in and holding her close to your body. Closing your eyes you took a few deep breaths, commiting the feeling of her tiny warm body against your chest to your memory. You knew that all too fast she would be growing up, getting bigger and bigger until one day she won't fit into your sweatshirt anymore.

Your fingers found purchase in the soft downy baby hair on her head. Just a few strands, you could barely call it hair. Speaking softly you asked as you rubbed her head,” What does my baby want to do today huh? Maybe take some naps, snuggle with mommy? What if we ask Uncle Sam if he wants to meet you today? We'll have to ask Mama when she wakes up. She needs her rest so she can take the best care of you.”

Eventually your daughter fell asleep to the vibrations of your voice with a tummy full of milk, and you sighed feeling content yet again. Within the next half hour or so you knew your love would wake up, and you knew you would put your daughter down in her crib and help take care of your partner. But for now you enjoyed the near silence of your bedroom, now illuminated in soft sunshine, the only sound being the breaths of the two people you loved most in this world.

[averagemisfit03]

MASTERLIST

*New masterlist update May 8, 2023: I’m still digging back through likes and reblogs to find my fics (newcomers: I deleted my entire masterlist and all my writings in 2022 🙃). As I find them, I’ll relink them here.

*update 2024: one shot/blurb requests are open!

Keys:

🤍- fluff

‼️- angst

✨- smut (MINORS DNI, 18+ ONLY)

Disclaimer: ALL of these writings are works of PURE FICTION. I do not (nor will I ever) know the boys in real life. Nothing in these stories reflects them in their personal life in any way, shape, or form. This is fantasy, this is for fun, it is NOT REAL.

Fifteen ‘til Takeoff Pt. 2 (first fic ever, from my og acc that I locked myself out of) ‼️🤍

Reflections ✨🤍 (one shot, MINORS DNI)

Object Of Desire Pt. 2 ✨🤍‼️ (2 part series, MINORS DNI)

I’ll never know you ‼️ (A sappy, sad little blurb)

Lukewarm ‼️🤍 (one shot, my fave fic I’ve ever written 💗)

Til’ Death Do Us Part ‼️🤍 (one shot, see A/N, repost from scratch ☹️)

The Thought of You ✨ (tiny smutty blurb, MINORS DNI)

Home 🤍🤍🤍 (fluffy blurb)

Kiss it Better ✨🤍‼️ (One shot, MINORS DNI)

From the Fires (one shot request, finished) ‼️🤍

[averagemisfit03]

Object Of Desire (pt 2, finale!)

Josh Kiszka x f!reader

Warnings: MINORS ABSOLUTELY DNI, 18+ ONLY. Graphic sexual content, oral (f!recieving), fingering, unprotected sex, mild orgasm denial, soft dom!josh, public(ish) oral sex (someone walks in), cursing, a tiny bit of angst if you squint, if I missed anything let me know 🥴

Word count: 5.6K

Summary: THIS IS PART 2, reference part 1 in my masterlist ☺️ y/n is home from college for summer break. When she finds herself needing inspiration for her literature project based on desire, who better to lend a helping hand than her long time friend Josh?

This is the long awaited and promised part 2/2 of Object Of Desire! I’m so excited to finally drop this for you guys and I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. Thank you for all of the interaction with part 1! Feed back is much appreciated 🥺 As always, special thanks to my bestie girl @streamingcolors-gvf for input and for doing my final revision since my brain was fried.

We begin and end the finale with smut, but there’s fluff and casual in between, I promise 😅

Join the Tag list: @streamingcolors-gvf @saggitariusissa @prophetofthedune @eeeloraaa @thetroublegetssoloud71 @ashabeannn @imdepressedaf1996 @hayley1623 @cassy-face @gretavanfleas @beanzzzzzzzzzz @josh_Iamyour_mama @joshkiszkas @age-of-nyahh @baguettejuliette

“I know, mama, you feel so good for me. So fucking good for me.” Josh pants into your ear as you dig your fingers into the skin of his back, desperate for him to be closer, although you don’t know how he could be. As he brushes a strand of your hair away, he caresses your face so gently you’d have sworn you were made of porcelain. You look up at him through blurry eyes and as the warmest smile creeps across his face, you can’t help but feel a little more than exposed. The movements of his hips slow almost to a halt as he cups your jaw in his hand and places the softest, sweetest kiss to your lips.

“Have I ever told you how beautiful you are?” he whispers, drawing a line down your nose with his index finger. You blush feverishly at his words but he gives you no time to form a concrete thought, much less a response, before his hips resume their previous pace, driving into you with such deep force that you can feel him against your cervix with each thrust. His soft curls tickle your neck as you cling to him, holding him against you as your legs wrap around his waist. The release you so desperately need is coming into focus as your head buzzes with bliss. You’re agonizingly close and as his hips fall out of rhythm, you know Josh isn’t far behind.

“Oh my god, Josh, please don’t stop.” You beg, “Please don’t stop…”

The sudden, harsh blaring of your alarm awakens you with a jolt. Confused doesn’t even begin to describe the way you feel as you roll over and smack the screen of your phone, effectively silencing your alarm. Flopping back into your pillow, you take a moment to process the way you and your bed are both so empty despite how sure you were, only moments ago, that Josh was there with you.

“What the fuck is going on?” you ponder aloud. Never in your life had you been so caught up with something the way you were now with yesterday's events. You replayed the moments over and over again, working through them in your mind. Romance was never a factor in the friendship that you and Josh had shared over the years…right? You lie in bed for what seems like an eternity, digging through the mental files of years and summers past, trying to find a connection. Suddenly it seems obvious- all of the evenings and weekends spent rehearsing lines that you both already knew inside and out, blowing off your friends over the summer so you could see each other instead, even applying to and eventually accepting scholarships at the same university, even if it did fall apart in the end. It was him. It was always him.

After spending a substantial amount of time cruising down memory lane, you check your phone. A text from Josh pulls a smile across your face and giddy excitement burns in your chest as if you were a teenager.

|Happy Birthday, Birdy! :) I’ll be there at 11 with food.

You stare at the screen, smile still intact, before you notice the current time- 10:40am. Shit.

Bounding out of bed and into your walk-in closet, you dig through your old summer clothes in hopes of finding the yellow sundress you had worn once to a drama conference you attended with Josh. With no luck searching through hangers, you begin yanking clothes out of every drawer in sight. A thread of yellow peeks out from underneath a stack of old t-shirts and shorts and you pull the dress from its hiding spot. Tiny white flowers embroidered the surface of the golden yellow fabric from top to bottom. Slipping it on, you’re pleased to find that it still fits as well as it once had, but perhaps a bit shorter than before. Zipping the back closed, you rush into your bathroom to finish getting ready. You brush through your wavy hair and pull a few framing strands back to pin them out of the way. Never being a fan of a caked face, you apply a few coats of mascara and a dab of blush across your cheeks. Just in time too, because no sooner than you had zipped your make-up bag, there was a sing songy knocking at your front door. You glance at yourself in the mirror one last time and smooth your dress down before padding barefoot down the long white staircase and into the front foyer to open the door.

“Jo-” He cuts you off with yet another one of his soul warming hugs, this time however, you allow yourself to fall into him just a bit more, one hand diving into his soft curls as you bury your head in his neck. He chuckles as he hugs you tighter, rubbing a hand up and down your back.

“Happy birthday, pretty girl. Did you miss me?”

“Miss you? Pfft, yeah right.” You tease as you lean back to look at him. He’s doing it again- beaming that million dollar smile. His skin is tan and the sun has kissed a soft pink glow across his nose and cheek bones. Summer looks disastrously good on him, and the sight makes your knees weak. He places a soft kiss to your forehead and breaks your embrace to shake a large, white paper bag in front of your face.

“I brought bagels an-.”

“Bagels? That’s it? I’m starving over here” you cut him off, sarcastically, throwing your hands up and stomping your foot as he walks into the kitchen to place the bag on the table.

“And, if you would let me finish, I brought bagels AND fruit.” He takes the food from the bag and displays it across the table as if it were art, gesturing towards it as he turns to face you again.

“Very nice, Kiszka, I suppose this will do.”

“You know me, birdy, I aim to please.” He winks at you as he pulls a chair out for you to take a seat.

“Oh god, yuck! Spare me the bullshit, Josh.” You fake a gagging sound before you roll your eyes and smirk at him. As you take your seat at the table, he leans down and pulls your hair away from your face, leaving his hand to rest at the back of your neck.

“That’s not what you were saying yesterday.” His lips ghost the skin of your ear as he whispers. Goosebumps prickle across your skin at the feeling and you suck in a deep breath before you look up at him. He’s aware of the effect he has on you and knowing this is enough to please him. He simply smiles down at you as he drags his fingertips across your neck and down your arm before making his way to the other side of the table to take a seat for himself.

You had expected there to be a tangible tension in the air after yesterday, but there wasn’t. Although it was obvious that things were forever changed between the two of you, the atmosphere and the conversations came as easily as they always had. Nothing felt embarrassing. Nothing was awkward. It was just you and Josh, the way it always was. When you both had finished eating, you cleared the table and put away leftover fruit while Josh began setting up a small stereo system on the patio because he insisted that “good music is essential for a positive energy space”. As you walk through the living room to meet him outside, you pass by the vase he had somehow found yesterday after your garage escapade and realize that you never picked up any flowers for your centerpiece.

“Shit.” you mutter, looking down at the empty vase. Josh had heard you from outside, and leaned backwards to peek through the open sliding glass door.

“What’s wrong?” a look of confusion and concern paints his face.

“I forgot to get flowers for today.”

“Why don’t you utilize your mothers floral wonderland out here?” he says, pointing to the fence of your back yard which was lined with both rose and peony bushes that your mom had kept up for years. You shake your head, knowing how mad she would be.

“She would kill me if I cut her flowers, Josh. Where did you manage to find this thing anyway? I looked everywhere yesterday.” You pick the vase up and walk outside to place it in the middle of the table. Even without flowers, the glassware was beautiful and the iridescent pearl beading caught the sunlight perfectly to cast a rainbow sheen onto the table below. Josh connects his phone to the stereo system and John Denver begins to hum softly through the speakers as he makes his way to you. He picks up the vase, bringing it close to his face for further inspection. You watch as he twists and turns the piece before peeking around the side of it to catch your gaze.

“It was literally sitting on the first shelf beside the garage door. I don’t think you were looking very hard.” He teases, placing the vase back down onto the table. You roll your eyes and the giggle that escapes him in response is a sound only God himself could have created. His hands are softly grasping the edge of the table and the positioning allows the sun to catch his triceps, creating a mouth watering visual of his tensing muscles.You realize now that you’re staring and you know he’s watching. You don’t have the courage to meet his eyes, so instead, you let out a sigh and turn away from him to face the backyard.

“I suppose I should go start getting the food ready”, you glance down at your wrist only to find it missing your watch, “What time is it?”

Josh rounds the table, subtracting the distance between the two of you and standing so that your shoulders are flush with each other.

“3:41. Who all did you invite?” Out of the corner of your eye, you see him turn to look at you. You can’t quite place where the nervous feeling you have has suddenly come from, but it’s hard to shake as you finally allow your eyes to meet his own.

“Just you, your brothers, and my friend Samantha from my poetry analysis class.” you say, trying to manage your nerves.

His soft brown eyes scan your face as he nods his head. It’s so easy to get lost in the warm, fiery golden color of his gaze. You’ve always been a sucker for brown eyes, but his were by far your favorite. It’s funny the way you could feel yourself falling for him- slowly, suddenly, comfortably, like you knew it was coming after all this time. Even after spending the last 2 years apart, the two of you only existed within the life you had always known together. You never believed in lust as a catalyst for anything good, but perhaps yesterday was the kickstart your relationship with Josh needed.

“Birdy? Birdy. Y/N!”

“Huh? What? Sorry, I spaced out.” You try to laugh away the blush building on your cheeks, but you know there’s no use.

“Oookay, well whenever you’re done being weird, go inside and grab the burgers and hotdogs”, He laughs as he knocks into your shoulder, causing you to topple over against the table, “I’m gonna get the grill fired up. People will be here any minute.”

Jake, Sam, Danny, and your friend Samantha all show up right on time. Josh plays the role of grillmaster for the evening while Sam and Danny busy themselves with an old volleyball, paying no mind to the lack of a proper net. Jake and Samantha immediately hit it off and are sitting across from each other at the patio table, talking about god only knows what, but soaking each other up nonetheless. Then there’s you, standing with your back against the sliding glass door, relishing the sight of both old and new friends simply enjoying each other's company. As if the evening wasn’t already nostalgic enough, “The Night We Met” by Lord Huron begins to play through the stereo speakers, further setting a tone of longing. You find yourself fixated on Josh when he begins to sing along, shuffling burgers around on the grill.

“I had all and then most of you, some and now none of you…take me back to the night we met.” Josh really did have the voice of an angel, or perhaps a siren, the way he was pulling you in. He’s also apparently got a knack for feeling your eyes on him, no sooner than he had sung the words, he was smiling at you over his shoulder. With nothing else to do, you smile and shake your head, walking towards him and resting your chin atop his shoulder.

“Looks good.” You say, breathing deeply through your nose, “Smells good too.”

“Pressure’s on this evening, after all, I am cooking for the birthday girl.” He pulls his head far enough to the side to smile down at you and you roll your eyes, rubbing the length of his spine with your left hand.

You perch yourself onto your tippy toes and lean in closer to his ear. “Lucky for you, I’m not hard to please.” You whisper.

“We’ll see about that.” This time he doesn’t look at you, but the tension he knows he’s created causes you to bite down on your bottom lip as you slide away from him, standing off to the side of the sizzling grill.

“Food is ready!”

After realizing that no one had thought about a birthday cake, Josh fumbled around in one of your kitchen drawers and returned with a match which he then lit and placed directly into the bun of your cheeseburger before roping everyone in to belt “Happy Birthday” to you as quickly as possible before the match burned a hole in your food. You blew out the makeshift candle and once everyone had contained their fits of laughter, the six of you scrunched together around the four-seat patio table to eat. The sun began setting fast and the Edison bulbs that were strung across canopy beams lit the patio in a soft, golden glow as everyone finished their meals. One by one, the table cleared and everyone began to mingle again. You wished you hadn’t, but you overheard Samantha telling Jake about your upcoming lit project and how significant this grade was as a deciding factor in acceptance to the PhD program. You can feel yourself disassociate as you become encapsulated by dead end thoughts regarding your lack of preparation. Your eyes frantically dart around your backyard and land on Josh, who is already looking at you. The sound of your beating heart is thumping in your ears and you’re sure that you look like a deer in headlights. Josh is nursing a near empty highball glass, rotating it between his fingers. His head is cocked to the side and his brows knit together as he mouths “you okay?” in your direction. You swallow hard and manage a half nod before you turn and gather some plates and drinkware to carry inside.

Once inside, you pour yourself a glass of ice water and allow yourself a moment to recompose yourself. You begin to rinse a few dishes and load them into the dishwasher when you hear the sliding glass door open and then close, followed by soft footsteps in your direction. Josh is standing behind the counter opposite from you with his arms crossed and propped up on the granite slab.

“You okay, birdy? You looked a little stressed out there.” His tone is cautious, taking care with his words not to upset you. You sigh heavily and close the door of the dishwasher as you turn to face him.

“I’m fine. I just overheard Samantha telling Jake about our lit write-up and I panicked a little.” You lean against the kitchen island and take a sip of your water as Josh watches you intently.

“I wouldn’t panic just yet, you’ve got plenty of time to brainstorm a PhD worthy story for these people.”

“I know I have ample time here, but the issue is not knowing what to write about. I mean, desire as a concept? How vague can you be? And what in the world do I have in my life to base a story of desire on?” You drop your head into your hands and sigh. The sound of bare feet padding across the tile floor let you know that Josh is now making his way to you. His hands wrap around your forearms and peel your hands away from your face.

“C’mere.” He says, wrapping your arms around his neck and bringing you into his chest. Over the course of the evening, the first four buttons of his shirt have been opened and you lay your head against his warm skin, breathing him in.

“I just don’t know what I’m going to do.” You mumble against his chest. He kisses the top of your head softly and as you pull away to look at him, your eyes pause over his soft, pouty lips. Your mind drifts back to the feeling of his lips against yours and you find yourself desperate for yesterday's contact.

“You staring at my lips right now?” he chuckles, poking your ribs.

“I-no, I-I’m sorry I-” you stumble over your words and attempt to pull away from him.

“Don’t apologize.” His grip around your waist tightens as he brings you body flush with his once more. “If you want to kiss me, all you have to do is say so…” Josh tilts your chin up, forcing you to look at him. You’d have sworn in that moment that you could practically see the lust cloud his pretty brown eyes, but his smile is soft. You muster the courage to bring your lips closer to his and the cheeky smile he’s been sporting widens as you close the distance between the two of you. There’s no use in fighting the warmth that cascades over you as your lips dance with his. Josh licks across your bottom lip, just as he had before, asking permission to deepen the kiss. You oblige and moan softly into his mouth when your tongues finally collide. He sighs deeply in response and his left hand wanders south of your spine to knead the soft skin of your ass through your already too-short dress. Your own hands find their favorite spot- tangled in his soft curls. If yesterday was a first time experience, today was muscle memory.

Josh nips at your bottom lip softly, sucking against the skin of your jaw.

“You know,” he says, as he moves to trail kisses down your neck, “You say you like to give your works of fiction a base in reality…let me give you something to write about.” He bites into the soft skin at the base of neck, causing you to moan out before he smoothes it over with his tongue. His words lace through your brain and already feel your desire pooling between your legs.

“Josh…”

“Hmm?” he works his way back up to your lips and a searing smile spreads across his face.

“C’mon birdy, call it inspiration.” He says. You can’t help but laugh as you take his face in your hands for a moment to bask in his features. His rosy pink cheekbones, the sharp angle of his nose, the way his hair rests just above his brow bone.

“You’re killing me” you say, placing small, chaste pecks to his lips. He’s not up for the sparing contact this time and his hand braces the back of your neck to pull you deeper again. A haze shrouds your thoughts as you lose yourself in the feeling of his lips, his body, all of him, against you. Everything is slowly starting to fall apart, yet somehow together, all at once. You’d been so caught up in the heat of it all that you hadn’t even noticed the way the hem of your dress was now piled up along your waist as Josh’s hungry hands were tugging and smoothing the skin of your hips. You snake your own hand between the two of you and begin to fidget with the button of his burgundy shorts, not surprised to find him already impossibly hard, throbbing against the fabric of his boxers. Running your palm against his impressive length elicits a gravelly moan to rattle through his chest and the sound only adds to your excitement. He breaks your kiss to lay his forehead against yours, but his eyes never meet yours. Instead, his gaze is downcast, watching you rub against his cock. His mouth hangs slightly agape, and the softest moans escape him. You pull back the waistband of his boxers and take him completely in your hand, pumping up and down at an agonizingly slow pace.

“Fuck, birdy.” he sounds breathless already.

In one swift movement, he’s moving your hand and hiking your leg around his waist, pulling your body flush with his. The wetness of your panties becomes evident as he presses into you and the sensation of his cock against your aching pussy is tantalizing. You whimper against his lips as you begin to grind into him.

Distant laughter catches you off guard and you suddenly remember everyone gathered outside.

“Josh!” You scold, breaking your kiss for the second time, “we shouldn’t do this! Not now, not here.” Your voice trails off as you turn to look out across the patio, watching as everyone is smacking the volleyball around behind the dim glow of the outdoor lighting. Josh huffs a laugh as his right hand slides away from its place on your neck and rests over your sternum.

“Your mouth says one thing, but your racing heart says another.” He brings his hand to your chin and pulls you back to face him and your cheeks immediately run hot under his gaze. You’re never one to be speechless, but Josh has a way of calling you out with such accuracy that you have no need to respond.

“Allow me to give you a lesson in objects of desire.” He drags his hand up the inside of your thigh, resting two fingers on top of your clit, pressing into the soaked fabric of your panties. Feeling the effect he’s had on your body pleases him and a low hum vibrates from his throat as he begins to rub circles around the sensitive bundle of nerves. Your hips thrust into Josh’s hand, just as they had done yesterday when you were perched atop your dad's car for him.

You pull his forehead into yours and gasp as you watch him touch you.

“Josh…” you moan as you press your face against his.

“Go ahead, mama, tell me what you need.” He says, remaining focused on building your pleasure.

“I need to feel you, Josh.”

You whine in protest as he removes his hand from you. He spins you around, now facing the foyer with your back to him. His hands trace their way down your hips and slide underneath what little fabric remains hanging over your ass. Hooking his fingers under the lace of your panties, he drags them down and allows them to fall to the floor.

“Put your knee up on the counter for me, pretty girl.” He says, tapping your outer left thigh. You do as you’re told and bend over slightly to accommodate the edge of the kitchen island, awaiting whatever it is that’s coming next.

Josh rubs his hand across the soft skin of your ass, shaking it softly as he does so.

“You’re so fucking pretty for me, Birdy.” The praises paired with the nickname and Josh’s voice cause you to bite down on your lip as you turn over your shoulder to look at him.

“You look so delicious, mama. Can I taste you? Would that be okay?”

“Please, Josh.” You’re practically begging at this point, desperate to feel him in any way you can. With your approval, Josh squats down, leveling himself with you from behind. He takes his time, dragging a long, slow, wide lap of his tongue across your pussy, causing you to cry out.

His hands are still grasping into the skin of your ass as he expertly flicks his tongue across your clit. Occasionally allowing himself to dive into your pussy, and the feeling of his tongue inside of you only leaves you aching for more. You try to keep your composure, given the fleeting remembrance of everyone outside. Breathless moans fall from your lips like honey as you search for something, anything to steady yourself with on the counter, eventually settling for a grasp on the edge of the small island sink. Josh is busy sucking and rolling your sensitive clit, pushing you dangerously close to the edge, when you notice a black figure approaching the patio doors across the living room. Immediate panic sets in as you begin trying to push Josh out from under your dress with your feet.

“Josh! Josh! Someone’s coming!” your ability to speak is barely there and Josh’s grip on your hips stays steady.

“Yeah, you in just a second if you’ll hold still.” He smacks your ass playfully and chuckles into your pussy, proud of his quick wit.

“No! Someone’s coming into the house!” You try to stand up and swat him away but your efforts are futile as he bends you over again and plows his tongue into you with even more force.

“Hey, birdy!” Sammy’s chirpy voice rings into the kitchen as he comes uncomfortably closer, “is it alright if we use your- whoa, you alright over there?” He stops dead in his tracks and tilts his head to the side taking obvious notice of your current disheveled state. Josh remains hidden behind the counter and underneath your dress, and you can feel his soft lips twist into a smile against you, not ceasing to work his tongue in quick laps across your swollen clit.

“Y-yeah I’m good…there was a spider” You choke out. Josh lunges his tongue impossibly deep inside of you again and causes you to squirm as you purse your lips tightly, fighting the moan that’s trying to escape.

“Oh, gross…well, is it alright if we start up a fire in your firepit out here? Jake and I brought stuff for s’moooores.” Sam grins, shaking a bag of marshmallows in front of him.

“Yeah, absolutely! I’ll be out in a second.” Your smile up at him, trying your best not to fall apart on the spot. Despite your nerves, Josh has managed to work you to your breaking point in a matter of seconds, right in front of his little brother. Sam turns on his heels and heads back towards the patio. He stops at the sliding doors and looks back at you again.

“Hey, have you seen Josh?” Fuck.

“Uh, no, I haven’t, he might be upstairs doing…something.”

“Oh, well if you see him tell him to get his ass back out here.” He calls out as he closes the door behind him.

As Sammy disappears across the deck, your legs begin to shake, failing to hold you upright as Josh draws you into your first orgasm. Suddenly, his mouth goes missing from your soaking core. He stands up behind you as you whine, replacing his tongue with two fingers as he snakes a hand up the front of your dress and stands you upright against him.

“Actually, I’m downstairs, doing…you.” He smirks into your neck as you hiss at the feeling of his fingers stretching you out.

“Fuck, Josh, I was so close.” Your brows knit together as he pumps in and out of you, teasing you with the flutter of his fingers.

“I know, mama, I’m gonna take care of you. I promise.”

You roll your hips against his hand and allow your head to fall back against his shoulder. Feeling his erection pressing into your thigh as you rock backwards furthers your need to have him inside of you completely.

“Josh, please…”

“Tell me what you need, mama.” He purrs, coaxing you into spilling your desires into the hot air surrounding you both.

“I want you to fuck me, Josh.” The words leave your mouth without a second thought, knowing already what you so desperately need. It’s evident that your words have taken a toll on him as well because when he opens his mouth to speak, his voice falters softly.

“Anything you want, baby.”

You shiver in anticipation as Josh pulls his fingers from you slowly and positions himself behind you.

“Be a good girl and open that pretty mouth for me.” He says. You do as you’re told and welcome the taste of yourself on his fingers. You suck the pads of his fingertips, moaning when feel his cock teasing your slicked entrance.

“Oh, fuck.” You cry out as he finally, finally, pushes into you. You adjust to his size, and he moves his hand to grasp lightly over your throat. The small, gentle assertion of dominance from your sweet Josh clouds your head with lust as you fall away from him, laying flush with the cool granite below you. Because of the angle you’ve mounted over the counter top, each thrust of his hips allows his cock to tap against your cervix with agonizing pleasure. There are no words, no thoughts, just bliss as you take him all the way to the hilt each time. The orgasm you had nearly caught earlier is slowly winding back up inside of you and you can feel yourself growing weak. Unable to form a coherent thought, you’re nothing but a mess of moans beneath him. Josh is growing breathless too and the sound of him panting behind you mixed with the sound of his hips smacking into your ass is building your ascension to a release. Suddenly breaking his focused movements, he wraps your hair into his fist and pulls gently, arching your back and allowing you to open even further for him.

“God damn, y/n, you feel so fucking good on my cock.” His voice has dropped an entire octave as the breathless confession leaves his lips. He drives into you with such force now that your hips begin to grow sore against the edge of the counter, but you pay it no mind. You reach your own hand between your legs and begin to rub circles over your clit, moaning out at the additional contact. Josh takes notice and a low groan rumbles up from his chest.

“That’s my good girl, birdy. Make yourself cum all over my cock. I want to feel you cum for me.”

Hearing him speak to you with such hot desire is enough to push you over the edge. Within seconds you’re a writhing mess, shaking and clenching around his cock mercilessly. He takes notice when your hand drops from your pussy and replaces it with his own, swirling his fingertips over your overly-sensitive bundle of nerves.

“Josh, please, I can’t.” Your eyes screw shut as the last of your orgasm washes over you. His hips never slow, and instead begin to fall into an even faster rhythm as he continues to work his fingers against you despite your plea.

“Yes you can, mama, cum for me one more time.” He pulls out of you for a moment to spin you around to face him. Taking your right leg over his hip, he re-enters you with no hesitation and continues his sickening pace. He’s falling apart by the second and you relish in the sight. He pulls the straps of your dress down and his hands find your breasts, rolling your nipple between his fingers as he sucks hard to the skin of your neck. You grab into his hair, pulling his head up so his mouth can meet yours as you moan against his lips.

Without a moment's notice, his sweet brown eyes shut tightly and a string of moans and curses leave his swollen lips as his orgasm takes over.

“Oh my fucking god, Josh.” you gasp as his hips slow and the sensation of him filling you up pulls you into your second and final orgasm. He holds tightly to you, keeping your body flush with his as you shake in his grasp.

The two of you stand for a moment, still holding onto each other, trying to catch your breath. Josh looks almost sheepish as he looks into your eyes and traces his thumb over your bottom lip. Your smile turns into a giggle as you lay your nose against his. Being the sweetheart he is, he helps you straighten your dress back out before re-dressing himself and wetting a few paper towels to help clean you up. You stand across from each other now, sharing glances and giggles as you take a moment to process.

“So…how’s that paper coming along?” Josh grins as he reaches his foot out to kick yours.

“I actually just completed my field research.”

“Yeah? What did you discover?”

You look up at him, this time beaming a smile of your own as you reach out to take his hand in yours and toy with his fingers.

“Oh, you know…the object of my desire.”

[averagemisfit03]

Update May 8, 2023: For those who don’t know (new followers I’ve had recently), I used to dabble in some fanfic. After encountering the meanies of tumblr, I quit writing and deleted my masterlist and all of my works. Recently I’ve been thinking I might try to write again and I was super sad that I deleted my most popular fic. My sweet friend Sam ( @streamingcolors-gvf ), who was also a tremendous help with this fic, was able to dig back and find it. So if anyone is interested, I wanted to welcome back my favorite baby: Object Of Desire (Part 2 is linked at the bottom). I had several other fics as well in all categories (fluff, angst, more smut). If I’m able to find them, I’m going to redo my masterlist. I hope some of my new followers might enjoy this. Requests are also open via asks if anyone has anything they’d like to see written. Love u. Be nice. (Please)

Object Of Desire (pt 1)

Josh kiszka x f!reader

WARNINGS: SMUT! 18+ Only, Minors DNI, sexual content. Cursing, First time vibes, fingering, heavy petting, etc.

Word count: 4.5K

Summary: y/n is home from college for summer break. When she finds herself needing inspiration for her literature project based on desire, who better to lend a helping hand than her long time friend Josh?

THIS IS PART ONE OF TWO. The best is yet to come, part 2 is filthy 🤪 this is what I might call “edging” 😏

Thanks to everyone for reading and interacting with my first smut Reflections! I hope you all enjoy this one and stick with me for part 2! Special thanks as always to @streamingcolors-gvf for creative inspo and input 🤍 also, my deepest apologies for the wild formatting. Tumblr always fucks me over when I copy and paste from my Google docs.

Join my tag list! @streamingcolors-gvf @saggitariusissa @imdepressedaf1996 @hayley1623 @prophetofthedune @ashabeannn @cassy-face @eeeloraaa @gretavanfleas

For the first time since beginning your undergrad program, you had the summer all to yourself. No classes, no exams, no late night studying, just you and the heat of July. With your new academic freedom, you decided to journey back home for the summer. Born and raised in the charming city of Charleston, you had spent every moment of your life in this warm, salty, ocean air right up until you moved away for college. Your family and several of your childhood friends were still here and you were so excited to finally be back. Not only spending your summer break at home, but your birthday as well.

Your key in the door turned smooth as butter, and the sweet vanilla air rushed into your nose and straight to your heart. Your mother had always been a fan of simplicity and swore that the vanilla aroma was the only way to make a house feel like home. You left your bags by the door and listened as the now aged wooden floors creaked and cracked beneath your feet. A place that was normally full of music and laughter was eerily silent today with you as its only occupant. Your parents had taken a cruise to Mexico for three weeks and, although they tried to string you along with them, you needed to be back on campus the first of August and the cruise wasn’t set to return until the third. Your mom was quite upset at the timing of things and rightfully so. Not only would she be missing your birthday, but your last visit home until Christmas as well. You had meant to call her when you arrived home safely, but instead found yourself basking in the fondness of home.

You made your way into the dining room and looked around at everything, seemingly untouched since you had last visited. Perched upon the kitchen island was a glittery, periwinkle gift bag with a card propped against it. “Birdy”, your mothers sweet cursive writing adorned the outside of the envelope. For as long as you could remember, everyone had called you Birdy. Your father had shared with you his love of planes at an early age and had taken you on numerous flights throughout your childhood where you served as his “co-pilot” each and every time. Somewhere along the way, he had picked the nickname for you, and it stuck. He even named his first glider “Birdy”, in honor of you.

You opened the card first, reading its contents. “Happy 23rd birthday to our beautiful Birdy, we are so proud of all your accomplishments and the young woman you are becoming. We love you so much! P.s. Birthday dinner is on us”. A crisp one hundred dollar bill lay folded in the crease of the card. Being an only child has its perks, especially considering the financial status of your parents.

You tore the white tissue paper out of your gift bag and uncovered a beautiful stationery set, complete with a printed signature on each page reading “Y/F/N Y/L/N, PhD”. You were six months shy of finding out whether or not you had even been accepted into your university's English literature PhD program, much less a graduate, but your parents had never doubted you for a second. You stood for a moment, stumbling over the “what-ifs” in your mind, only to have your ramblings interrupted by a voice echoing into the foyer.

“Y/n?” You rush to find you’ve left the front door open and standing in the doorway is your neighbor and long time friend, Josh Kiszka. When he sees you round the corner, his entire face lights up with a smile that would put the sun itself to shame.

“Birdy!”, he exclaims, stepping towards you with wide open arms. “I didn’t know you were visiting home!”. He wraps you in a bear hug and you’re enveloped in his warm woodsy scent. You realize in the moment how long it's been since you last saw him and toy with the idea that perhaps you had missed him. The two of you step apart and you take in his features as you try to re-collect your thoughts.

“Josh! It’s been so long! How have you been?” you smile, trying not to seem lost in thought.

“I’ve been good…I’ve actually been here since January”, His eyes leave yours and find a connection with the floor as he rubs the back of his neck nervously before looking up at you again. “What brings you home?”

“I actually have a break from classes for a few weeks so I thought I’d spend my birthday and the remainder of what’s left of summer in the comfort of my old home. What about you? Taking a break from college life for a bit?” you turn and head back for the kitchen to find drinks for you both, hoping he’ll know to follow. Inside the large double door fridge you find that your parents stocked up for you before they left.

“Uh, yeah, um, something like that. I’ve actually dropped all of my courses for the moment and I’m taking time off to reassess my career choice” It’s obvious in his tone that he’s self conscious about the decision, but you’re happy that he confides in you. Nonetheless, your friendship was practically built on sarcasm so you can’t help but pick at him.

“Hmm, a college drop out. Your parents must be so proud.” You smirk at him over your shoulder and hear him snicker as you pull two glass bottles of Harry’s Lemonade from the carton. You hand one to Josh who has found himself a seat atop one of the four barstools lining the kitchen island and is looking through your new stationery set.

“I’m just kidding, Josh. I don’t blame you at all. I wish my break was going to last longer than two weeks”. You pry the lid off over the edge of the white granite countertop and press the bottle to your lips, taking a slow sip. Josh makes no attempt to be subtle as he watches your lips linger over the edge of your bottle for a moment and the sight of him taking you in makes your stomach flip.

“Got any big plans while you’re here? Gonna take one of daddy’s airplanes on a trip around the country real quick?” he quips back, returning the humor as he leans across the counter top to playfully shove your elbow. As you had grown into your teenage and young adult years, people had always picked on you about your wealthy family. It made your skin crawl to know that people thought your life was going to be handed to you when you very well knew otherwise. Your parents had worked hard for their success and strongly believed that you should do the same. Were they willing to help you out? Sure! Were they going to pay for your entire life? Absolutely not. In fact, you busted your ass to make sure you were awarded enough scholarships to pay your way through college.

“Ha ha ha, very funny”, you roll your eyes and swat his hand away, “unfortunately, I won’t be roaming the vineyards of California this summer. I have to get a headstart on next semester's write-up while I’m home for a bit and able to focus”.

“A write-up?” Josh raises an eyebrow at you and rocks back, trying to balance himself on one leg of the barstool. “What does that entail?”

“Basically I have to create a fictional story based on this semesters concept of desire. My professor apparently likes that I try to ground my works of fiction with a piece of my own reality.” You pause for a moment, twirling your bottle cap around your fingers, before you mumble mindlessly, “Not really anything desirable about me or my life, but whatever.”

“That sounds boring as hell.” He says, matter-of-factly.

“Did you not want to do anything fun for your birthday?”

“Like what, Josh? Get drunk and run naked through the neighborhood?”

“Actually, yeah, that’s exactly what I was hoping for. Can I watch?”

You look up at him, expecting to find him smirking in your direction, but instead, his face is sincere, as though he was genuinely asking to watch you run naked through the neighborhood. You feel heat rising to your cheeks and quickly redirect the conversation.

“Actually I was thinking about putting together a small cookout”, you turn to the cabinets behind you and begin to rummage through dishes in an attempt to settle the blush from your cheeks before you face him again, “would you and your brothers like to come?”

“Abso-fucking-lutely, that’s a great idea!” His tone is genuine and his excitement makes your heart skip a beat. “How do you want me to help you set up?”

You turn back to face him now, holding a white, scallop edged plate in your hands with no intention of using it for anything other than maybe to cover your face when he inevitably makes you blush again. When your eyes meet his, you’re warmed with a sense of familiarity deep within his honey golden gaze. He’s got a strange knack for distracting you today, but you regroup.

“Actually, I think my parents pretty well stocked the place with food for me before they left, so I really just need to decorate the backyard a bit and get the grill cleaned up.”

He cocks his head to the side as he raises his eyebrows and throws up two finger guns pointed in your direction. “I’ll clean the grill if you want to look for decorations?”

“Okay!” you can’t help but chuckle as he skips through to the living room and then out the french doors to the back patio area.

There wasn’t much that needed to be done to make the patio look cute. The outdoor furniture was already the focal point and there were beautiful, rustic edison bulbs strung across the canopy beams above. Some throw pillows for the furniture and a vase for centerpiece flowers was all you needed to tie it all together. Your sweet grandmother had gifted you her beloved opal vase for your eighteenth birthday and it was your favorite eye-catcher. Last you remembered, it had been packed away for safekeeping while you were away.

The cool, musty air of the garage covers you in goosebumps as you pass by your dad's old chevelle to reach the shelves lining the back wall. Upon rummaging through some old boxes, you find your highschool yearbook from your sophomore year. You flip through the large book, smiling at old friends and familiar faces as nostalgia seeps through the pages. Allendale highschool was known for two things: football and theater, the latter being where you had met Josh for the first time. Josh was passionate and dramatic, both of which made him the perfect theater kid. Combined with your love of Shakespeare and poetry, the two of you were inseparable in your teen years. Your undeniable chemistry scored both of you the leading roles in nearly every school play and you spent more time rehearsing lines with Josh than anything else.

It was hardly a secret that everyone in your community was rooting for you two to end up together, but things just never fell into place. Josh had originally accepted a drama scholarship to the same university you decided to study literature at, but three weeks before admissions, he changed his mind. He faltered back on his certainty of film as a career and decided to play it safe by studying for a business degree at a small in-state college. When moving day came, the two of you parted and fell out of touch. Seeing the two of you trapped in time together within the pages of a book made your heart sink. You always had feelings for Josh but you refused to risk your friendship. A wave of regret washes over you and you’re overwhelmed by a sense of loss as you become caught up in thoughts of what could have been. You sulk for a moment, chewing your bottom lip just before you hear footsteps moving towards the garage door, causing you to haphazardly toss the old yearbook back into the box and you pretend to busy yourself with a container of christmas ornaments. Josh jumps off of the doorstep into the garage and lands with a thud on the cement floor.

“Alright Birdy, the grill is clean”, he says, dusting his hands off against each other before placing them on his hips, “What are we looking for in here?”

You stand up from where you were leaned over and motion around to all of the clutter lining the shelves in front of you, acting as though you hadn’t spent all this time reminiscing about your years spent with Josh. “I’ve found some pillows for the patio furniture, but I can’t find my vase”, you sigh, trying to sound exasperated.

Josh roams around, peeking into a few boxes and pulling out various items. “I bet I’ll find so much cool stuff in here. What color is the vase?”

“This isn’t a garage sale, Josh”, You walk past him and kick at his foot as he tries to trip you, “It’s beaded opal and it’s older than you are so be careful.”

“Hey, hey, hey, that’s not how this works. Finders keepers, Birdy, finders keepers.”

You toss half-deflated basketball in his direction and drag the loft ladder out from the corner of the garage, lining it up with the grooves in the wood above you.

“While you’re down here twiddling your thumbs, I’m going to check the loft.” You say, shaking your head at him.

To your dismay, the only thing hiding in the loft is your dad’s old sports gear. Tennis rackets and balls, golf clubs, and a single roller blade which you laugh at and toss to the side. You decide there’s no use in digging around anymore and maneuver yourself carefully back to the edge of the loft. Adrenaline causes the sensation of prickles down your spine as you drop your left foot and fail to make contact with the ladder you had placed only moments before.

“Going somewhere, Birdy?” Josh snickers. Looking back over your shoulder, Josh is standing with his arms crossed and a mischievous smile spread across his face.

“Josh put the ladder back!” You whine.

“Sorry, doll, looks like you’ll have to find another way down.”

“Seriously, Josh! I don’t have time for this. There is no other way down.” Once again your face burns red but this time, out of frustration. You turn yourself around on the edge of the loft, allowing your feet to dangle. The drop really isn’t far, being that your father built the loft and he isn't the tallest of men. Regardless, you’re not about to jump down. Josh lets out a belly laugh that further fuels your fire.

“I guess you’ll just have to hop on my shoulders then. Otherwise you’ll be stuck up there forever.” he says, throwing his hands out and shrugging. Still with that sneaky smile painted across his pretty face.

“Josh, I am not getting on your shoulders for christ sake!” You huff. “I’m literally wearing a skirt.” You motion to your outfit and Josh looks you up and down, sparking a strange heat somewhere deep inside.

“Oh, give me a break, Birdy. It’s not like I have eyes in the back of my head.” He looks you over once again and you feel your blood running hot.

“Fine.” You huff, scooting as close to the edge as you can get. “You better not drop me, Josh.”

“Ye of little faith.” He says, beaming a winning smile as he turns and backs himself to the edge of the loft, reaching his hands up for you to steady yourself on.

Placing your hands in his, you drag yourself onto his shoulders. Your skirt drapes over his back and scrunches up at the front, leaving your heat flush with the skin of his neck. You let go of his hands and rest yours atop his head. His own hands find their place on top of your thighs and the contact makes your heart race.

“Let’s go for a spin, shall we?” he says, giving your leg a squeeze.

“No! No, no, no!” A shrill squeal leaves your mouth and you can’t stop yourself from laughing as Josh begins to spin in circles with you on his shoulders. He dips and weaves, acting as though he might drop you, but you stay steady nonetheless. Between fits of laughter from the both of you, you tap the top of his head and beg: “Josh, please put me down, I’m getting scared!”

“For someone claiming to be scared, you sure are laughing a lot.” Despite his rebuttal, he backs up to the hood of the chevelle and squats down to allow you to shimmy away off of his shoulders.

“I’m scared of heights, you know.” You scold, smoothing your skirt back down over your legs. Before you can move, Josh spins around and places his hands on either side of you, entrapping you between him and the car. His face is dangerously close to yours as he flicks his tongue across his bottom lip.

“You know you liked having my head between your legs.” his voice is barely above a whisper as his gaze locks onto your lips for a split second before his eyes meet yours.

“J- Josh…” completely taken aback, his name is all you can manage to stutter. In all the years you had spent getting to know him, you had never seen him act like this; especially towards you. A devilish smirk adorns his luscious, pouty lips from corner to corner as he becomes aware of the effect he’s having on you.

“Tell me I’m wrong, Birdy.” he says, shifting his head slightly to the side, taking a closer look at you. His hot breath fans across your face and you feel a warmth beginning to pool between your legs. Your mind is racing as you search for words but your mouth falls short. You say nothing at all, staring at him in disbelief.

His left hand finds its place back on your thigh, a respectable distance from the hem of your skirt, but the way his hand feels pressed against your skin causes you to squeeze your legs together, begging for pressure against your already throbbing core. He leans in impossibly closer and nudges your nose with his own, tilting your face up slightly before repeating himself.

“Tell me…I’m wrong…” He sounds breathless this time and his voice seems to tiptoe over every nerve in your body. You shake your head, dying to close the space between the two of you. Without hesitation his lips crash into yours and you find your hands tangled in his satin soft curls. He slides his tongue across your bottom lip, asking for permission to deepen the kiss.

He moans into your mouth as your tongues meet and his hands begin to find frenzy in touching your body. His right hand is now resting on the small of your back, holding you steady while his left hand has disappeared under your skirt, gripping your hip as though he’s afraid you’ll slip away. Your entire body is on fire under his touch and you feel the desperate need to have him even closer. You bite down gently on his lip and his moaning in response sends you deeper into your spiral.

“Easy now, Birdy,” he mutters between kisses “you know I’m weak for you.”

A giggle barely escapes you as you drag your teeth across his lip once more. This time, he takes his hand from behind your back and spreads your legs as he pulls your hips down to meet his. You gasp as you feel his erection press into your sensitive core. Josh pulls away, scanning your face as his own takes on an expression of concern.

“I’m so sorry, Birdy. I don’t know what I was thinking.” He puts distance between the two of you now, fearing that he’s pushed things too far.

“No, it’s okay” you breathe out, taking his hand in yours, “it’s fine, I like this side of you.” Your voice trails off, lacking confidence in what you’ve just said, but the confession brings another wave of heat to your cheeks and your eyes rest on his hand where you’re drawing circles with your thumb. He chuckles softly and closes the space between you once more.

“Well, in that case…” his voice falters as he begins trailing chaste kisses down your neck. You inhale with a hiss as he nips over the sensitive skin of your collar bone before smoothing it over with his tongue. You’re growing hotter by the second and at no will of your own, your hips buck into his, seeking touch where you need it the most. His palms are sweaty as he slides his hands up your skirt, one of them resting on the crease of your thigh while the other begins to play with the lace of your thong. Your own hands race underneath his shirt, wrapping around him and stroking his toned belly, relishing in the softness of his skin.

“Can I touch you, mama?” The new nickname nearly pushes you over the edge. This is it. This is desire.

“Please, Josh” you whine.

“Please what, Birdy?” He’s teasing now, and you’ve got no time for it. You take hold of his hand and guide his fingertips under the hem of your panties, leaving hardly any distance between his fingers and your aching pussy.

“Please touch me, Josh.” You sound whiny, but your request is one he is happy to oblige.

His fingers dip into your folds, soaked with arousal. A moan escapes your lips as your head falls forward onto his shoulder.

“Jesus, mama. You’re so fucking wet. Is all of this for me?” he swirls his fingers across your clit and you bite into his shoulder to keep yourself quiet. Every movement is winding you tighter and tighter and yet again your body is bucking into his, searching for release. He slides two fingers into your core, expertly tapping against your g-spot, and you aren’t able to stop yourself from crying out his name this time. His lips find yours again as he begins to pump in and out of you at a sickeningly sweet pace.

Mindlessly, your own hand wanders to the waistband of his shorts and pops the button open. His kiss swollen lips leave yours for only a moment as you press your palm into his throbbing erection.

“Fuck, Birdy, you’re driving me crazy” he moans out. Between Josh pushing himself harder into your hand and the sensation of his fingers gliding in and out of you, you can feel your orgasm building. Your mind is buzzing as Josh moves his free hand up into your shirt, pleased to find no bra in place. He rolls your hardened nipple between two fingers and as you throw your head back, groaning in absolute pleasure, he sinks his teeth into your earlobe and pulls deliciously at the delicate skin. You try to remain as present as possible in the physicality of it all but you lose yourself all too quickly in the bliss that's begging to bubble over.

“Josh, I’m so close” you mumble into the side of his face, unsure if your words were comprehensible, let alone if he heard you. As you continue to rub against his cock, the two of you become a symphony of breathless moans.

Three sharp knocks at the front door yank the both of you back to earth. You’re frozen, eyes locked on each other, not saying a word. Three more knocks ring out, this time, with the addition of a woman's chirpy voice.

“Y/n! Are you home?” Your jaw drops the second you recognize the voice. Josh’s mom. “Y/n? I’m looking for Josh, if he’s still here!” Josh pulls his fingers out of you, immediately causing you to cry out. You shoot him a look of panic as you shove his shoulder, frantically pushing past him, sliding off the hood of your dad's car.

“Be right there!” you call out as you readjust your clothes. Josh pulls you back into him, pressing your ass into his still there erection, and giggles into your neck.

“What’s wrong, Birdy? Don’t want my mother to hear you scream my name?” he brings his hand back up underneath your skirt and resumes rubbing circles into your clit outside of your panties. You grab his hand and turn to face him, fear drawn all over your face.

“Are you fucking crazy, Josh?”

“Depends on who you ask.” He smirks, trying and failing to hold onto you as you break free from his grasp and run back into the kitchen area.

You glance into the mirror hanging behind the dining room table and are mortified to find a cluster of purplish red marks along your collarbone. You do your best to tame your hair and use it to hide the evidence Josh left behind. Hands still shaking, you open the front door.

“Hi, Mrs. Kiszka!” you beam as you step out to hug her. Josh’s mom is an absolute angel and was a treasured soul within both your family and your entire neighborhood. She’s someone you even considered to be a role model as you were growing up.

“Hi, sweetie! I didn’t know you were visiting home!” she smiles, “Josh saw your car in the driveway and ran straight over. Is he still here?”

“H-he is! He…was helping me clean and organize a small cookout for my birthday tomorrow.” You’re practically boiling over with anxiety, hoping she can’t somehow sense the hot, sweaty mess you were just in with her beloved son.

“Oh, that’s wonderful, honey! I’m sure it will be beautiful.”

Footsteps approaching from behind send a wave of relief over you as Josh appears beside you to take his share of the heat. In his hands, your beaded opal vase.

“Here you go, Birdy, found that vase you were looking for.” He says, handing it over to you. You take the vase in your hands, staring at it with your mouth slightly agape. Where the fuck did he find this?

“Hi, mom.” He cheeses the biggest, goofiest grin in her direction.

“Dinner is ready, if you’d like to come eat!” Mrs. Kiszka offers, starting down the steps of your front porch.

“I’ve got some take out that I picked up on my way into town, but thank you!” you chime, genuinely appreciating the offer. As she makes her away across the lawn and back to her house, Josh follows suit.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Birdy, don’t miss me too much.” He calls out, spinning around to make eye contact with you as he places his fingers, the ones that had previously been buried knuckle deep inside of you, into his mouth for a long, slow suck. He makes an exaggerated “mmm” face as you stand gawking at him, and throws you one last wink before disappearing behind the tall white picket fence.

PART 2 IS POSTED! Read it here 🤍

[averagemisfit03]

Reflections

Josh Kiszka x Reader oneshot

Warnings: FILTHY SMUTTY SMUT. MINORS ABSOLUTELY DNI. Explicit 18+ content. Mirror play, fingering, oral sex, unprotected sex, cursing, mild dom! Josh, etc.

Word count: idfk but it’s a lot for a oneshot.

Disclaimer: this is my first smut, so my apologies if it isn’t top tier. This was a wild ride for me.

This is a spin off of the anon prompt I sent in to @tripthelightfandomtastic for wild Wednesday yesterday! I decided to turn it into a full length oneshot. Special thanks to @streamingcolors-gvf for creative support and for hyping me up. Ily bestie 🤍

“Sweetheart?” The soft call of Josh’s voice along with a gentle knock on the dressing room door was what pulled you back into reality. Josh and the boys had just finished up a show and the two of you had anniversary reservations for dinner at one of your favorite restaurants. You had never missed one of their shows since you and Josh had been together and tonight would be no exception which is why you had decided to bring along a small suitcase with a few different outfit options for dinner and stored it in Josh’s dressing room before the show had started. The two of you were celebrating your two year anniversary and you wanted to look as magical as the night itself. After much internal debate, you settled on a red satin mini dress that you knew was a favorite of his. You studied yourself a bit longer in the mirror paneled wall and for a moment, you wished your slim figure was a bit curvier. You had spent so many years struggling to feel comfortable with your body but Josh loved each and every part of you in such a way that you were finally able to love yourself too, so you brushed the thought away as quickly as it had come.

“I’ll be right out!” You chirped back.

“Can I come in?” Josh cracked the door open ever so slightly and peeped in with one eye and you couldn’t help but laugh.

“Actually, I do need some help getting this dress zipped if you don’t mind”

Josh opened the door and made two solid strides in your direction before stopping dead in his tracks and looking you over from head to toe.

“Christ sake, mama. You know what that red dress does to me”. He pulled his bottom lip between his teeth and you practically watched the lust cloud his sweet brown eyes. You tried not to acknowledge his tone and instead tried to redirect him to your dinner reservations.

“Not now, prince charming. Let’s not forget the dinner we’ve had planned for months”.

Josh made his way to you, placing his hands on your waist from behind and planted a sultry kiss to the crook of your neck. You hoped he wouldn’t notice the hitch in your breathing, but you knew you had been caught when your eyes met his in the mirror in front of you.

“Fuck dinner” he whispered against your shoulder, sending a wave of chills down your spine, “you look fucking delicious”.

Rather than zipping your dress, his fingers hooked the skimpy straps at your shoulders and began slowly working the skin tight satin down over your arms.

“Josh...” What was supposed to be a protest was practically moaning.

“No, no” he stepped back only slightly and his gaze caught yours in the mirror again, “none of that mama. Don’t even try. I would like my dessert before dinner tonight, do you understand?” A buzzing warmth washed over you and you could feel pressure building between your legs already. You nodded your head in silent agreement, desperately missing the previous contact of his hands on your body.

“That’s my good girl”, he smirked, “go ahead and finish taking that dress off for me, baby.” You do as you’re told and watch his facial expression in the mirror in front of you as a pool of red satin lands at your feet, revealing nothing underneath. He looks pleasantly shocked and you blush a little under his gaze of approval.

“No panties under a dress that short? What a little slut you are for me”. Before you can speak, Josh is behind you again. This time with a rough hand along your jaw, pulling your face towards him. He kisses you in a way that feels frenzied, needy, hungry. His tongue traces your bottom lip and you groan slightly as you grant him entrance. Your tongues crash into each other and dance for only a moment before he breaks away and snaps your face back to the mirrored wall in front of you.

“I’ve always had a love of mirrors. I’m fascinated with the way they allow us to watch moments unfold in realtime.” He sounds philosophical, almost poetic, but his growing excitement pressing into you from behind assures you that his mind is far from a collegiate lecture.

“I want you to watch our love come to life right here on this wall in front of us, mama. Can we try that tonight?”

“Please, Josh...” is all you manage to choke out. The heat between your thighs is causing you to become more desperate by the second.

“Please what?”

“Please touch me, Josh”

“Sit down” He directs. You sit softly on the carpeted floor beneath you and watch in anticipation as he undresses himself behind you. He follows suit, sitting down with his legs on either side of you. He pulls you into him, but his eyes never leave the you that’s reflected in front of him.

“Knees up, baby, spread those pretty legs for me”.

You’d be lying if you said you weren’t uncomfortable seeing yourself so vulnerable like this, but seeing Josh turned on and lost in the heat of it all made you want to keep going. You watch in the mirror as one hand makes its way to your aching pussy and the other finds your already hardened nipple. He swirls his fingers around your clit and you can’t stop the moan that escapes your lips. Without hesitation, he slides two fingers into your dripping core and begins to pump in and out of you at a sickeningly slow pace. Your hips buck forwards involuntarily, searching for more friction, more pressure. Your head falls back against his shoulder as you whine his name but he quickly corrects you.

“Eyes up, mama. I want you to watch. See how you can’t stop yourself from fucking my fingers? See how fucking wet you are? Making a mess all over my hand” he hisses through gritted teeth, trying to fight his own desires.

He picks up the pace, with his fingers matching the thrusts of your hips and his palm pressing into your clit with each movement. You feel yourself tighten around his fingers and somewhere deep inside a fuse is burning dangerously close to the end.

“Fuck, Josh, I’m so close”, you warn.

He looks you dead in the eyes through the mirrored wall as he whispers in your ear

“Go ahead y/n, I want you to see how fucking pretty you look when you cum”

And just like that, you’re a sloppy, writhing, cursing mess. Fighting to keep your eyes open and fixed on the mirror in front of you is a battle you lose all too quickly. You find yourself gripping both of Josh’s forearms as you come down from your high, bordering on overstimulation. He pulls his fingers away, causing you to shudder.

“That’s my girl” he says with a genuine smile, “now tell me how good you taste”

You open your mouth almost too eagerly, sucking yourself off of his fingers.

“So fucking good, Josh”, you moan out.

He groans, taking in the sight of you tasting yourself from him and it causes you to feel that familiar ache building inside again. This time though, you want to help Josh find his release— and make him watch.

“Lay down” you’re not surprised when you hear your voice waver slightly, taking control isn’t something you try often. Without saying a word, Josh lies back onto the floor, never breaking eye contact with you.

“Ah ah ah,” you say as you shake your finger at him. Josh’s eyes grow wide when you reach down to catch his chin and turn his head to face the mirror beside him.

“It’s your turn to watch” you purr.

You make a soft trail of kisses up his sharp jawline, pausing briefly to suck at the sensitive skin below his ear. A low growl rumbles throughout his chest up into his throat and encourages you to keep going. Josh is perfectly toned with beautiful, soft, tan skin that’s now glimmering with sweat in the soft light of the dressing room. You continue your trail of kisses down body, taking note of the places that make him shudder. Just above his bellybutton, you bite into the soft skin of his stomach, causing his back to arch ever so slightly.

“You keep doing shit like that and this is all going to be over soon.” Josh says, noticeably out of breath. You look over in to the mirror to ensure he’s still watching you and find him staring at the reflection of your bodies, mouth agape and hair a mess. Taking in the sight of him like that further pushes your desire to please him. You waste no time taking him into your mouth, swirling your tongue around the tip of his dripping cock and working your way to the base.

“Fuck, y/n,” Josh moans out as he grabs a handful of your hair, “that filthy mouth of yours feels so good for me”.

Sucking him off has always been a favorite of yours. You love watching how turned on he gets from the simple movements of your tongue and lips. Josh hums out a low moaning buzz and begins to buck his hips, pressing himself to the back of your throat. You’re growing hotter by the second and you know Josh is close to finishing. You need to feel him inside of you and can’t risk losing out on the opportunity. You stop abruptly, eliciting protest from Josh and rightfully so.

“What do you think you’re doing? I was so fucking close” he hisses, rolling his eyes back and shut, no longer facing the mirror.

“I know, baby, but I need you inside me,” you realize you sound whiney and try to regroup,

“I wanna watch you fuck me from behind, Josh. I want to see you fall apart when you cum inside this pretty pussy”. Your words shock both of you as they spill so effortlessly from your mouth. Josh smirks at you before smacking your ass and pushing you down on all fours in front of him, both of you facing the mirror this time.

“Is that what my good girl wants?” He teases, circling his thumb over your entrance, causing you to yelp and push back against his hand. “You wanna watch daddy make you his little slut? You wanna watch me fuck you into a moaning mess right here on this floor?”

“Please,” you beg, “please I need you, Josh”

He steadies himself behind you and rubs up your back with his right hand. You’re taken back a bit when you feel his hand around your throat as he pulls up underneath your jaw, causing your head to lift and your eyes to land on his in the mirror in front of you.

“Eyes on me, mama” he says sternly, but barely above a whisper. Taking no regard for your need to warm up to his size, Josh thrusts himself into you and immediately picks his rhythm. A sharp smack to your left ass cheek leaves a sting as he grips into your flesh in the same spot. What was once uncomfortable for you had now become your fetish. Your eyes were glued to his reflection. Watching him squeezing your throat tight enough to keep your attention, but not enough to falter your breathing. Seeing hot sweat drip down his neck and his once bouncing curls now stuck to his face. And of course, watching your body bounce off of his with each and every movement. With every thrust of his hips, Josh was tapping against your sensitive cervix, driving you over the edge with pleasure and just a touch of pain. Your second orgasm was building and you could hardly catch your breath.

“Josh, I-I—“ is all you can manage to say. His eyes haven’t left you once and he nods knowingly back at your reflection. His hips begin to move out of rhythm and you feel yourself tightening around his length. You watch in the mirror as Josh loses control and it is the most breathtaking sight you’ve ever seen. His eyes squeeze shut and his mouth drops open, spewing a mix of your name and obscenities as his head drops back. With a final thrust, you find yourself dissolving into pure bliss for the second time as he fills you up with his warm cum. As the both of you come down from the high, Josh rolls his head forward to face you again as he pulls out.

“That was fucking incredible” he beams at you in the mirror, looking like he’s won a marathon. Still tangled in your thoughts and the rushing of sensitivity throughout your body, you lie down on the floor without saying a word.

“Y/n? Darling, are you okay?” Concern is laced in his tone as he sits next to you and rubs your back.

“Y/n?” He tries again

“That was…unbelievable” you muffle out against the carpet. Josh laughs and you roll over onto your back to look at him. There he is—your sweet, beautiful, brown eyed boy smiling down at you. You sit up and lean into him as he brushes the hair off of your face and strokes your cheek gently.

“We’re gonna have to make dinner reservations more often” he chuckles, mumbling into the side of your head.

“Do you think they gave our table away?” You laughed, still half in a daze.

“Baby, I think they’ve already locked up for the night,” He shifted to the side and leaned down to see your face, “we could always grab a pizza and rewatch space odyssey”, he winked and you both bursted into laughter.

“That sounds fucking lovely”, you snort, “but you’re gonna have to loan me a pair of underwear and a shirt before we can leave here”, you say, motioning to your lack of clothing.

“Boxers or briefs?” He jokes, beaming that commercial smile at you once more. After you’re both dressed, you head out to crash at Josh’s apartment for the night. On the ride there, you can’t help but wonder if his fantasy had played out the way he had dreamed it up.

“Was it everything you wanted it to be, you know, the mirror play?” You ask, nonchalantly.

“Anything with you is everything I want it to be”, he smiles for a moment before a quizzical look draws across his face, “what about you? What did you think of the experience?”

You think for a moment, then nudge his elbow as you laugh,

“I’ll have to reflect on it.”

[averagemisfit03]

Josh kiszka x f!reader one shot

WARNINGS: SMUT YALL. ITS SMUT. 18+, MINORS DNI. Graphic sexual content, fingering, penetration (wrap it before you tap it, kids) tiny bit of choking if you squint, orgasm denial (also squint), angst, fluff. Anything else I forgot? Let me know. It’s been an extremely long time since I’ve written!

Word count: 3.8k

Summary: Josh loses out on a huge creative opportunity, y/n helps cheer him up the best way she knows how 👀

A/n: hi friends! It has been a VERY long time since I’ve written a fic. Recommendations and feedback are always greatly appreciated. But please be kind. I didn’t give this one a deep comb through before posting, because I don’t want to stress about it and over think it. So pardon any errors. I hope you all love it!!!

Tag list!: (let me know if you’d like to be added/removed or if your user needs to be updated) @streamingcolors-gvf @infisonicosm @joshsindigostreak @readyforthegarden @obetrolncocktails @capturethechaos @tlexx @shutupdevvie @jake-kiszkas-smirk @streamsofstardust @thetroublegetssoloud71 @jakekiszkasleftnutsack @gretavanfleas @gretavanlace @tripthelightfandomtastic @hayley1623 @doodle417 @weightofdreams-gvf @weightofdreamz @joshym @agitfortheneverbeliever

Your eyes roam aimlessly around the heavily occupied library as people swarm in and out. Between hobby bookworms and mid-term panicked students, you’d think someone would have interacted with you by now. I mean after all, you are sitting in a playpen full of puppies. Who the fuck hosts an adoption event INSIDE a public library? 

Other than annoyed glances with each whine and bark of an antsy puppy, no one had even acknowledged your existence. You glance down at your watch, 4:15. The event was supposed to last until at least 5:30. There were eight mutts total, 10 weeks old, and not one had found a home since you arrived at 2. Something of an animal enthusiast yourself, you were half tempted to take one home out of pity. Nevermind your landlord's “No Pets” policy. 

“What are they going to do with these puppies if they aren’t adopted today?” you whisper over your shoulder to Chloe, the self proclaimed “manager” of this function. Her aunt owns the shelter these puppies have been calling home, and allows Chloe to front their public relations projects. 

“I dunno,” she shrugs, “not really my problem either.” The pop of her bubblegum is even more obnoxious than a pen of puppies. She doesn’t bother to look up from her phone and it’s obvious that she’s not actually concerned with the welfare of these animals. To be fair, you had only volunteered today to keep your own schedule full in order to avoid a dinner party at your brother's house. Regardless, you’d always been soft for animals and the brindle coat runt of the litter was slowly stealing your heart with tiny games of tug-of-war. 

The sudden ping of your phone feels somehow more embarrassing than the chatter of 8 puppies in a library. You quickly flip it to silent and begin to slide it back into your pocket before you notice the notification on the screen: “Josh Kiszka: attachment: 1 image”

Tapping the image reveals a screenshot of an email from The Indigo Film Academy. Josh had pulled together a stunning short film for the academy's annual film festival. He had even cast and scripted you a small part in the film, which you had only accepted because he’s your best friend. You had no personal interest in the film industry, but Josh was on fire for it. Being his passion since he was a kid, he’d shown you dozens of projects that he had worked on growing up. So many of which he was extremely proud of, but this particular creation was what he referred to as his “life’s work”; his prized production thus far.

“Mr. Kiszka, 

On behalf of The Indigo Film Academy, we regret to inform you that your film submission, although a stunning piece of work, did not meet standards that we at IFA hold for short film competition or honorable mention in our annual film festival. 

We strongly encourage you to continue your endeavors in the film industry and would be delighted to see more from your direction in the future. Remember that film is an ever-evolving art, and what is true to the heart is always beautiful to the eye. 

Best wishes, 

The Indigo Film Academy”

Your heart catches in your throat and you’re surprised to feel tears welling in your own eyes. Josh had poured his absolute heart and soul into this project from the moment he began creating it four months ago. You’d spent countless hours with him, by his side mostly just for moral support, aside from the tiny intro part he’d casted you for. Nights bled into days and slowly but surely he had perfected his masterpiece. He was practically bursting at the seams, and rightfully so, with excitement to finally have a piece that he deemed “worthy” of entering into the film festival. 

Aside from the screenshot, the message was empty. Speechless Josh was a rare occurrence and in this circumstance was undoubtedly gut wrenching. The thought of Josh sitting alone in his apartment after such a heartbreaking setback sends a wave of warm, prickly panic coursing through your body. You stand up so quickly that it startles the puppies and even manages to break Chloe’s zombie focus on her phone. 

“I have to go.” you blurt out, stepping out of the playpen and grabbing your purse from underneath the folding table that was responsible for displaying various collars, leashes, toys, and adoption packets.

“What do you mean?” Chloe scoffs, a disgusted look pulling across her face.

“Family emergency.” 

“Who’s going to help me clean all this up?!” 

“What was it you said about the dogs? Oh yeah”, you huff, “not my problem”.

With that, you’re shoving your way through bookshelves and people, headed straight for the door. 

“Your call has been forwarded to an automated voice messaging system: Hey, it’s Josh, you know what to do.” 

The time it took for the call to reach voicemail lets you know that he at least didn’t decline your call, instead it’s more likely that he’s ditched his phone altogether given the circumstances.

“Shit.” you mutter, hanging up and quickening your pace. The bitter cold Michigan air stings your nose and cheeks as you rush down the empty sidewalk. Josh’s place is only 2 blocks down from the library and you’d much rather brave the cold than attempt to find parking near his apartment on a friday night. You stop by your car long enough to toss in your bag and retrieve your “penguin parka”, as Josh so lovingly calls it, from the backseat. He wouldn’t be so quick to judge the way you seemed to waddle around in the oversized michelin-esque coat if he knew how warm it was. 

Josh’s apartment has a street facing balcony which, even in the cold, is usually lit in a tangle of white lights. It only seems appropriate that his decor, although minimal, would be as bright and warm as he is. But tonight, the railings are lifeless and dark; there doesn’t even appear to be a light on behind the sliding glass doors. You ascend 3 flights of stairs and find yourself standing in front of a locked door. Hoping it would have been open, for fear that he might not open it for anyone tonight. The truth is, he had given you a key to his apartment months ago, “in case you ever need somewhere to run”, he said. You stare at the key on your keyring, and contemplate knocking or just outright barging in. Of course he wouldn’t have given it to you if he didn’t want you to have it, but the gesture seemed more like an emergency offer than a casual invitation. 

Your overthinking gets the best of you and you opt for a jingle beat knock against the navy blue door. Nothing. 3 more knocks, with a bit more fire this time. Nothing. A heavy sigh leaves your chest as you slide the key in the lock and turn it. The inside of the apartment is just as dark as the outside. No lights on, no candles lit, no TV, no music, nothing. At this point you begin to wonder if he’s even home. You lay your coat across the kitchen island and slip your shoes off before tiptoeing into the living room. As you approach the back of the couch, you hear the faint sound of an office chair rolling across the hardwood floors. You turn to the sound, finding a soft orange glow from under the bottom of Josh’s bedroom door. 

Another door, another set of unanswered knocks. What the hell is he doing? Against your better judgement, you crack the door slightly and peek in. Josh’s back is to you, airpods resting in his ears. No wonder he didn’t hear me. He’s slowly shuffling through papers scattered all across his mahogany desk, shaking his head softly. His laptop is open in front of him, the screen paused on a scene you recognize from his film. It’s clear at this moment that he’s searching for answers, trying to understand where he went wrong, and it breaks your heart. 

“Josh?” 

He nearly falls out of his chair, jumping to the side as soon as your hand makes contact with his shoulder.

“Fucking hell, y/n, you scared the shit out of me!” He brings one hand to his heart, the other pulling the airpod from his right ear. 

“I’m sorry,” you giggle, “I tried to call before I came. Knocked several times”.

“Oh, I have no idea where my phone is. Somewhere in this mess of papers I’m sure”, he gestures at the mess in front of him, lifting piles of printed scripts to look underneath.

“Guess the key is legit after all”, you say, dangling it in front of him. 

He looks perplexed, raising an eyebrow, “Why wouldn’t it be?” 

“Ohhh, I don’t know. I thought you were just being nice.” 

“You’re one of my very best friends. Why would I give you a fake key?” He chuckles softly, shaking his head as he turns back to his desk, “You silly goose.” 

“Well, I hate to just waltz right into your home, but I was worried about you”, your voice trails off a bit, sympathy saturating your words, “I’m so sorry about your film, Josh…”

For a moment, he’s perfectly still. The glow of the desk lamp creates a soft silhouette of his features; his dangerously sharp jawline, prominent pink cheekbones, and a pin straight nose- save for the tiniest bump right in the middle. His nose has always been your favorite, for reasons unknown even to yourself. He shrugs slowly before running both hands through his soft, fallen curls.

“I’ve reviewed this entire project, down to mere seconds. I-I can’t find anything that I could have done differently…I just don’t understand” 

“That’s because it’s perfect, Josh”, you offer sincerely, “but not everyone is going to understand the depth of your creative mind.”

He says nothing in return. Instead, he looks up at you intently, his satin brown eyes burning into yours, and you’re not able to read his expression. Heat rises to your cheeks and you attempt to divert his gaze by reaching in front of him to close his laptop.

“Why don’t we order some take out? Have a game night?” You suggest, crossing your arms and leaning back against his closet door. His previously intense demeanor has softened, but his eyes haven’t left you. He looks you up and down, innocently unaware of how his attention is affecting you, before turning off the desk lamp and rising from his chair.

“Yeah, that actually sounds like a great idea. What did you have in mind?” He asks.

“Oh, um… I didn’t think that far ahead…” you pull a face which elicits a small chuckle from the beautiful boy in front of you. If anyone had ever wondered what heaven would sound like, you’d be sure to let them know they could find it in his laugh.

“I’ve got some menus in the kitchen. Let’s go have a look, shall we? Ladies first.” he bows slightly and motions you through the door in classic theatre kid fashion. 

Takeout thai is…well, takeout thai. Subpar food, made better by good company. Josh had given an earnest shot at trying to shake his disappointment. Between corny jokes and heated games of Uno and Sorry!, you’d have sworn he was cheering up. That was, until, your bathroom break ended, resuming your night to Josh standing, staring out the balcony doors. You’d have missed him completely if it weren’t for the dim, mixed glow of a handful of real and LED candles that you’d taken upon yourself to light. 

You move in behind him, wrapping your arms around him and lay your head on his shoulder, choosing not to speak in this moment. Afterall, silence is golden, right? You knew how deeply he was hurt and rightfully so. You’d do anything to make him feel better, if only you knew how. 

A few moments pass, his clean, woodsy scent filling your nose and your heart before you break the silence. 

“Come lay with me for a bit.” You say, wrapping your hand around his and pulling him to the couch. You’ve never known Josh Kiszka to be quiet, but he was truly at a loss for words tonight. No rambling, no banter, no overthinking, no venting, nothing. In most cases the stark  silence would make you uncomfortable, but the absence of noise was warm and inviting as he laid with his head on your chest. You hold him close, alternating between tracing lines on his arm and running your own fingers through his hair. He hums in approval, perhaps appreciation, before he shifts upward and rests his nose at the base of your neck. The small change of position causes your stomach to flip. You’d be lying if you said you’d never thought about Josh as anything more than a friend. Hell, you’ve known him longer than you’ve known yourself, it seems. He’s always been in your corner, a steady ship in all of your roughest storms. Josh has been one of the only constant variables in your life since you met him in middle school and, to be honest, he was the only person you’ve ever prayed would stay. To know him really is to love him. 

Fleeting thoughts come to a screeching halt when you feel his soft lips press against your skin. You stop breathing, feeling your entire body catch fire under his kiss. A trail of gentle pecks becomes more confident as he lightly sucks at the skin just above your shoulder. Meanwhile, his left hand has found its way to the small of your back, pulling your body closer to his. Your head falls back into the arm of the couch and you bring your hand to rest on his bicep just as his lips reach the edge of your jaw. Just as your fingertips meet his skin, he sits straight up, sliding himself away from you. 

“Jesus, y/n, I’m so sorry. I have no idea what I was thinking” The sadness his face has worn all evening is immediately replaced with a look of shame. It takes you a moment to snap into the reality of the moment, still buzzing from the feeling.

“No, no, Josh, it’s okay”, you reach back out to him, already craving the contact you just lost, “You don’t have to apologize.” 

You take his hand between yours and his eyes find fixation there. Another wave of silence has fallen over the two of you, but it’s much heavier this time. Your desire to feel his lips against yours is as intense as your desire to erase this shitty day from his mind, even if only for a little while. 

“If this is what you need right now…I can be that for you.” You say, leaning in. 

“I mean, that’s what friends do, right?” Kiss it better?” 

His eyes flick back up to yours, clouded with confusion. An unexpected rush of confidence floods your mind as your lips race to close the distance between the two of you. He stiffens at first and you’re afraid he’ll pull away again. Instead, he breathes a heavy sigh of relief against your lips and allows himself to meet your rhythm. Eager hands make fists in the fabric of your tshirt, pulling you up to straddle his lap. You can’t muffle the groan that escapes you as you feel him already hard through his jeans. The rigid pressure of his cock against the thin fabric of your leggings causes a familiar heat to pool between your legs. His hips buck up into you as you grind yourself against the strained fabric, the need for friction sending you both into a frenzy. He draws his soft tongue against your bottom lip, asking for permission to deepen this kiss. You oblige, of course, as his tongue crashes into yours, painting obscenities in warm strokes.  

“Y/n” he moans, working his hands into the waistband of your pants. His grip on your ass tightens as you bite softly into his bottom lip before pulling away just far enough to remove your shirt. His eyes darken as he looks you over, making you feel a bit self conscious. 

“Fuck, look at you” he says, gliding his hands up your ribs, pulling a trail of chills behind them. He makes quick work of removing your bra, tossing it carelessly to the floor. A string of kisses down your sternum leads him to pull the skin of your breast between his lips, no regard for any marks that may be left behind. 

“You’re so beautiful, y/n”.

“Josh…” 

“Hmm?” His response is muffled by his refusal to part ways with your nipple. Swirling his tongue around the sensitive bud and causing you to press your hips harder against him. “What does my pretty girl need?” 

You pop the button of his dark denim jeans and make a poor attempt to pull his zipper down. His head falls forward, his soft lips moaning against your shoulder as you begin to palm his throbbing erection through his boxers.

 The position of your bodies on the couch has made cramped space, but Josh’s right hand is quick to slide further underneath your ass, his fingers finally teasing your dripping pussy.

“Fuck, Josh” you whimper, trying to maintain your pace against his cock.

“You’re so fucking wet babygirl. All this, for me?” He smiles against your lips. Cocky bastard. Any trace of doubt has left him, and he’s now completely aware of what he’s doing to you. He sinks his middle and ring finger into your aching core, pumping agonizingly slow as your pussy tightens around his fingers. You lose what grip you had on him and instead snake an arm around his neck, your other hand grasping his soft curls. Your head tips back as you rock against his hand and his tongue traces the expanse of your neck. The tension in your body is winding tighter and tighter, desperate to find release. God knows, Josh could give it to you.

“Please..” your plea sounds as pathetic out loud as it did in your head, but your buzzing mind can’t form a coherent thought.

“Please” what, y/n? Let me hear you say it”. The pad of his thumb circles heavily over your swollen clit as he curls his fingers deep inside of you, tapping against your g-spot. The sensation nearly sends you over the edge, causing you to gasp as your body stiffens against his chest. Specks of light flash behind your closed eyes as he picks up the pace and you’re disastrously close to the summit.

“Y/n, baby, no..” he pulls his fingers out of you and you whimper in protest.

“Josh!” You scold him before your eyes have even opened. When they do, you find him nose to nose with you, grinning.

“I said,” he starts, slipping his still wet fingers into your mouth, pressing them against your tongue, “I want to hear you say it.” 

His eyes darken and his pouty mouth falls slack as he watches you suck yourself off of his fingers.

“I want you..to fuck me” you say, licking every bit of yourself from him.

“That’s my good girl.” He quips, withdrawing his fingers from your mouth and placing a quick kiss in their spot.

Suddenly the pile of clothes on the floor has grown bigger and Josh steadies himself above you. Despite the very recent heat, his gaze softens.

“Promise you’ll tell me if you change your mind?” He asks, brushing a piece of hair behind your ear, his eyes nervously searching yours. Sweet Josh, just as he’s always been.

“I promise” you reply, pulling him down for a kiss.

He wastes no time sinking into you. Pure ecstasy overtaking as he stretches you out, inch by inch. Each thrust is deeper than the last, and feeling him against your cervix pushes you close to overstimulation. His hand caresses the swell of your breast and his mouth follows close behind, showering you with wet kisses as he worships your body. In true Josh fashion, he can’t stop muttering sweet obscenities as he works his way to his own release.

“You feel so fucking good on my cock” he mumbles, his hips picking up their pace. You’re certain he’ll have claw marks on his back from the way you’ve been scratching, grabbing, desperately pulling him deeper and deeper into you. Through clouded thoughts you remember your initial offer- to kiss it better- and realize that Josh has somehow ended up putting in most of the work. Knowing that you’re both nearing your climax, you make an attempt to keep your word. You press your palms into his shoulders, pushing your full body against him and causing him to roll onto his back. 

“This was supposed to be about you, not me.” you whisper, leaning in to nip at the sensitive skin along his collarbone. His giggle in response is cut off by his own moans as you find your own rhythm, between bouncing and grinding deeper on his cock. He reaches up for you, running a hand up the length of your stomach and across your sternum. You savor the moment- the way he looks whimpering, sweating, writhing beneath you. The skin of your thighs grows sore with how hard he’s kneading them, his hands doing the gripping this time around. 

“Look at you,” you smirk, placing your hand loosely around his throat, “Falling apart for me.” His heavy eyes meet yours as he reaches for your hand, not able to speak over his pleasure. 

“You’re such a good boy, Josh. You know that?” 

The last of your words falter, as he pulls you flush with him, taking over again. He places his hands under your ass this time, lifting you slightly, and begins to thrust into you from underneath. The angle of his cock and the pace of his movements takes your breath away and you’re reduced to pitiful moans and incoherent mumbling. All of the build to this moment has become unbearable and you cry out as your orgasm washes over you, hot white fuzz from head to toe.

“Jesus, y/n, fuck, fuck, fuck” He stammers, his warm cum filling you up as his thrusts grow sloppy and his legs give out. 

You lie in silence for a moment, your head still on Josh’s chest. The rise and fall of his chest slows, as does his heartbeat, and it wouldn’t take long to lull you to sleep if it weren’t for Josh’s sudden laughter. 

“What are you laughing at?” You peek up at him, absolutely horrified that he could be laughing at a time like this. He twists to the side, allowing him to see the embarrassment your face is now holding, and places a reassuring kiss to the top of your head. 

“I’m gonna have to start purposefully submitting flops to the film academy if this is what it gets me.”

[averagemisfit03]

when god made me he just wanted to see how many things could be wrong with a girl at once

[averagemisfit03]

Sémillante

Part XI

AU!JAKE KISZKA X READER AU!JOSH KISZKA X READER AU!JAKE KISZKA X OC

word count 4,607

warnings minor dni, sir kink, praise kink, daddy kink? Unprotected sex, penetrative sex, implications of violence, sub/dom situations, drinking, alcohol

Perched on the edge of the chair, you stared across the table at Josh as he shoved a piece of his sandwich into his mouth and chewed slow and meticulous. You pushed your food toward the center of the table, your appetite having diminished days prior. Nothing had helped the way you felt, which for the most part was nothing but angry. You hadn’t allowed yourself the time nor space to feel hurt or upset any longer, finding solace in the rage that built within you. 

“You better eat that, I paid good money for…whatever that salad is,” he smirked playfully across at you as you allowed your body to relax back into the booth. 

“You gonna make me?” You quipped, eyes widening slightly as you watched his face take on a new expression. 

“I might. Do you want me to do that?” The implication in his tone took you back to the night the two of you had spent together, unfinished business prevalent in that moment as you recalled how Jake had busted in just to say you were his girl. Nausea rolled through your stomach as you remembered that night. 

“I think any other situation I would say yes, Josh I do. But no.” You audibly swallowed hard, fingers toying with the edge of the table you were sat at as your eyes watched them dance about the veneered wood. “I am so pissed off. And my anger normally breeds contempt and a need to lick my wounds in the best way possible.”

“By fucking your boyfriends older-by-five-minutes, incredibly much more handsome twin?” Josh quipped. You knew he was playing, trying to pull a better reaction from you than he’d been receiving through the duration of your meal. His joke was lackluster and you silently begged for any semblance of a laugh to bubble up from within you. Silence became you though, blinking back tears as you considered all of the events that had happened in such a short time. Maybe you should sleep with Josh. At least then it would distract you from all of the ridiculous notions you had let play out in your head. Where Jake was this misunderstood nice guy fully capable of having an adult relationship complete with trust and honesty. 

What a fucking joke that had been. 

“Yes by doing that. But I can’t even seem to force myself to care about anything other than being so angry that I feel like I could vibrate right out of this booth.” 

“I thought that might be the case,” Josh considered, chewing around another bite of food as he watched you thoughtfully. “I know you’re angry, I think that’s to be expected. But I imagine you are also hurt, and upset, and feeling abandoned or incredibly lonely. And so, I just want to say, that I’m here for you. Remove the night we almost spent together from the table, as much as I’d love to have a leg up on Jacob. My main priority is seeing that you are okay through this, and that you have support too. Lord knows he does.” He rolled his eyes then and you both muttered one name in unison. 

Savannah. 

Sure she would take his side and go crawling back as his best friend. Maybe even more. Nothing would shock you at this point. 

“You know he told me he didn’t sleep with Tiffany,” Josh offered as an after thought, settling up the bill by sliding his credit card to the end of the table as the server approached. 

“I’m sure that’s the story he is telling.” Truth be told, you had hoped he hadn’t, but you could never be sure. Not necessarily because of who Jake was, simply because of who she was. Paired with the way he had treated you not just over the last few weeks, but the last time you’d spoken face to face, you had your doubts. Josh vouching for his twin, if it could even be called that at all, held little importance to you. 

“Are you going to give him a chance to do better?” There was something behind the tone in Josh’s question, not entirely as if he weren’t curious. You could tell he was, but the intention you supposed wasn’t entirely due to his concern for his brother, or where the two of you landed when it came to your relationship. 

“That’s just it, Josh. I have given him chance after chance. And every time I feel like I have the flame under control, I get burnt again.” You slid from the booth then, stabding next to the table as you watched him stand from his seat as well just as the server returned with his card. After thanking her politely and stuffing the card into his wallet, Josh led you from the restaurant and out into the parking lot. You’d both arrived at the same time, so parking next to one another had been easy. You walked side by side, in step with one another as you both remained silent. You, chewing on the idea of whether or not Jake deserved another chance. Josh, for his part, was contemplating whether he himself had meant it when he said to take the night the two of you didn’t spend together off the table. Because maybe he didn’t. And maybe, since his brother couldn’t seem to stop messing up, he still wanted that chance. 

“Call me later if you feel like company? Or just, like, want to throw things and scream or something. I’m a good source of expending energy,” he flashed you his signature grin as you approached your vehicles, sat side by side one another. 

“Thanks Josh,” you moved in for a brief hug, your arms squeezing around his torso firmly as he kissed the temple of your head and offered a soft grin upon releasing you. 

“See you later, little deer.” 

“Bye,” you squeaked, climbing into your car after  

🔗🔗🔗

“Bambi, do you think you can watch the bar for five? I need to make a phone call,” Sam stopped you before you could retreat to the ladies room. You’d been giving a private dance to a client for the last four songs and were in desperate need of using the restroom, not to mention a moment alone to decompress for a few. 

“Uh, sure yeah.” You stepped behind the bar to take his place, watching as he took his phone from his pocket as it began to ring. Jake’s name flashed across the top. A sinking feeling in your gut pulled you out of the moment as Savannah approached. 

“Hey can I get another unopened bottle of bourbon for the Poker room?” You gave a nod and crouched down to rummage through the back stock of unopened bottles hidden beneath the counter, standing to present her with the liquor she had requested. 

“Sav,” you stopped her from leaving as she snatched the bottle off the bar top and turned to go. 

“Yeah?” She raised an eyebrow as she turned back to you, empty hand finding home upon her hip closest to you as she waited, albeit impatiently. 

“Do you know where Jake’s at tonight?” He had returned to being a recluse, or at the very least decidedly making himself as scarce as possible when you were in the building. 

“I think he had a meeting with the contractors and some of the business partners.” 

“Right.” Your sights dropped to the top of the bar as Savannah reached out and drummed her fingertips against it in a steady, annoying, rhythm. 

“I imagine Tiffany is there, also.” You couldn’t bare to raise your eyes again, knowing you’d be met with that frustrating smirk of hers. “I imagine she’s been taking care of him in the same way I used to. Don’t you find it curious, Bambi, that even when he was actively trying to pursue you he was still getting what he needed from me? As much as I loathe the woman, and lord knows I do, he was a fool for her. I’m sure he still is. And if I’m not taking care of his needs, I would reason that she is.” No. No, no, no. You had hated the thought, yet you’d already been thinking that for days, weeks even. 

“He wouldn’t do that.” You offered softly, swallowing down the nervous spit that threatened to turn to nausea as quickly as it had come on. You both knew you didn’t believe your own words. 

“Sure,” she chuckled mostly to herself before spinning and retreating back to the Poker Room once more, leaving you alone with your thoughts and your worries. It wasn’t much longer when Sam returned to the bar to take back over, his phone put away and a tense look holding his pretty features in a tight scowl. 

“Where is he, Sam?” You questioned before leaving the bar, knowing it may be the only time during that shift you’d get to ask. 

“At a meeting,” Sam returned gravelly, his jaw clenching and the muscles flexing and jumping beneath the weight of his obvious lie. “With the partners.” 

“You’re a shit liar, Samuel.” And he was, because if he had been present at all, he would’ve noticed Daniel sauntering in with Josh. You gestured toward the pair before sucking your teeth. 

“Fuck,” he groaned, turning to you with a hand to his hip. “What do you want me to say, Bambi?”

“Start with the truth,” you demanded, mirroring his pose as you puffed your chest out enough to seem intimidating. 

“He’s at home.”

“Bullshit.” Jake wouldn’t spend extra time at home, not alone, when the club was open. You knew that all too well. “Who is he with?”

“I don’t know-,” he huffed as your eyes cut back to him from watching Daniel approach. 

“Again. A shit liar Sam. Is he with Tiffany?” 

“I don’t know,” he groaned, tossing his hands in the air. “Maybe. All I know is he told me he had a meeting but when he called he was at his house. Please don’t run there,” he begged. 

You hadn’t planned to go there at all, willingly catching him red handed wasn’t something you fancied seeing. Truly, the implication of what he was doing was enough to make you believe it. No need to witness it with your own eyes. 

“Hey Bambi,” Daniel offered as he slid onto a stool, Josh miming his actions as he kept his eyes nervously on you. The energy in the room had shifted, all thanks to you, and everyone could feel it. 

“What’s up little deer?” Josh rested his chin on his fisted hand, elbow on the counter top as he stared across from you. 

“Nothing,” you huffed, defeated and tired of the game. 

“Sammy boy,” Josh’s attention moved to Sam next to you as he bristled and sat up straighter. When Sam’s directed his attention to his oldest brother, Josh continued. “I’m buying Bambi out for the rest of the night. And I’ll take a tequila soda, as well, when you have the chance. 

“Josh-,” you hated that he likely pitied you and was doing this as a courtesy to make up for his brothers short comings. 

“Don’t protest,” he insisted, taking his drink when Sam placed it in front of him. “I want a lap dance from my favorite little doe.” His words were final as he stood from his seat and made his way over to the corner of the room, a place you’d come to learn was his favorite. He could watch whoever was dancing for him as well as the rest of the room if he truly wanted to. You knew from experience, he wanted to. Always curious, much like Jake, he just enjoyed watching.  Following him, you lingered until the music started before straddling his lap. “Tell me why you were upset when I came in?” His eyes, cast up to you and begging, shone in the dim light of the clubs lighting. 

“You know why,” you spoke softly as you moved your body in time with the music. 

“My brother will continue to fuck up if you allow it. Show him you won’t sit around waiting for him.” 

“What do you suggest I do, Josh? Fuck you and run and tell him?” 

“Oh, little deer,” he chuckled darkly, his hands finding purchase at the back of your hips as he rutted you against him. “When you decide to come home with me again, it won’t be because you want his attention.” Your cheeks flamed at Josh’s insistence and the way he pulled you down against him, your heart pounding as you both stare at one another. 

“Josh,” you swallowed the nervous spit collecting at the back of your mouth, forgetting about the music momentarily. “You can’t touch me while I dance.” It was the only thing you knew to say, mostly because you were afraid of you spoke any further you’d either embarrass yourself or end up going home with him. What the fuck. 

“Hips, I can touch your hips,” he smirked at you, knowing fully the effect he currently was having on you. Even if the blush of your cheeks hadn’t given you away, your body would’ve as your nipples had pebbled into hardened peaks and you clenched around nothing as he pushed you more against his lap before releasing his grip on your hips as you squirmed away from his hands. “But I’ll keep my hands clean tonight. Doesn’t mean my mind will be though.” 

You whimpered quietly, rising from his lap and turning to face out toward the rest of the club as you returned to the lap dance you were meant to be giving him. 

🔗🔗🔗

Jake

Logically speaking, this needed to end. You knew that. You had known that. But getting lost and caught up in what could have come from the relationship of your past had been so…tantalizing. Some might say, even fun. And so very, very stupid. You had avoided Bambi at all cost, only to complain about not seeing her to everyone who may care or listen. Even Daniel had offered you the sage advice of “you fucked up, worse than I did…so goodluck with that.” 

And yet. 

You couldn’t stop. 

Your lawyers had been dragging their feet in getting you out of this mess, so you’d been playing very nice. That’s how this got started, didn’t it? They needed time to work things out and get you out of Tiffany being involved, legally speaking it would take work. You could play nice, butter her up real good so she wouldn’t push for more when it came time to inevitably buy her out of her percentage. Briefly, you could imagine how easy it would be to slide back into any semblance of a relationship you and Tiffany had once had. 

By briefly, you meant you’d begun daydreaming about it. Romanticizing the hurt she’d put on you so many years earlier, excusing and making excuses for all the ways she had ruined you. Your touch lingering any time you’d place a large hand over hers, or rest it against the small of her back as you walked her around the wall less floor plan of the second location. But by the light of the moon you’d pour yourself over tracking y/n’s moves. Ensuring she wasn’t moving on. Ensuring you weren’t too far gone to fix things when the time came. 

You should’ve known the time had always been there. You’d stumble into the club every night after you knew she’d gone home, tracking your way back to your office only to roll through video footage of the night to ‘ensure things were kosher’, always desperate to catch a glimpse of your girl. 

Your girl. 

That thought alone should’ve shown you where your loyalties lied. Where you had invested time and feelings into someone so incredibly willing to invest the same back in you. But it hadn’t. 

You were so fucking ignorant. Such a damn fool. 

But that wouldn’t stop Tiffany from pushing her way back into your life. No, it couldn’t actually. Because currently, after insisting you show her the business model and discuss at great length over it at your house, you’d found yourself in a state of undress with Tiffany straddling your lap and smirking down at you. Again. 

“Do you remember that thing you used to do with your tongue?” She questioned, her lips hovering close to the shell of your ear as her breath fanned out across your skin. 

“Yeah,” you confirmed, your head bobbing up and down slowly as you licked your lips. 

You were a damn fool. Letting this happen. Now for the second time in mere days. 

Bambi will never forgive you, the only thing muddling your thoughts as Tiffany drug her hands slowly down your chest and under the rich fabric of your button up. She lingered at the waistband of your pants, her fingers dancing over the cool metal of the buckle on your belt before beginning to slowly open it up. 

“Can you do that tonight?” The words purred out of her, like a sirens song dancing atop the waves of a blackened ocean in the depths of the night. And you knew this game well enough to know you were about to spend the next hour begging for relief or buried between her thighs. 

And then the rest of the night drinking away the guilt of what you had been doing. You wished you had it in you to stop. 

“Yeah,” you agreed, your arms wrapping firmly around her as you stood and carried her up to your bedroom. Her legs wrapped tightly around your hips as her mouth connected with the sensitive skin stretched over your neck and she began to suck and nip at your heated skin as you carried her through the hall to your bedroom. Once there you dropped her onto the mattress before your hands moved to finish the task of opening your belt and then the slacks you wore. Tiffany reached up to help, her fingers barely grasping at the material of the expensive pants before you found yourself slapping them and pushing her touch away. You could do it yourself. 

“I’m so glad you’ve begun to come around, Jakey,” Tiffany cooed, unzipping her short dress in a quick, fluid motion before shimmying herself out of it. “I think this will be the start of a beautiful relationship, with the business and rekindling our love.” You had to ignore her words or you’d not be able to do this. Yet, the question still begged to be asked. Why were you doing this? Only admitting your love for y/n in the dark, in the emptiness, in the solitude of just the two of you when you were able? In the drunken aftermath of any time you spent with Tiffany. Allowing yourself the momentary reprieve of a guilty conscious only until she was gone. You sneered at the thought as you kicked out of your pants and then, with little effort, your boxers. 

She had forgiven you for Savannah. You wouldn’t get that this time. 

Tiffany pushed the small scrap of material she had on as underwear down over her hips and ass, bending each leg to remove the garment before letting the material drop to the floor near the bed. She followed those shortly after by discarding her bra, scooting back on your bed and splaying out as she leaned back onto her elbows before beckoning you forward with a fingered gesture. Kneeing up onto the bed, you paused as you felt the mattress dip beneath your weight. Briefly, you considered backing out but the need to be enough for her, whether you actually wanted her or not, pushed you forward until you were hovering over Tiffany. 

“C’mon Jakey,” she encouraged, reaching between the two of you and palming at your length. “Big strong man, show me what you’re made of.” Could she shut up for once? Fuck. Her voice grated on your last nerve. A true battle within yourself, the wrong of it all was that you were sacrificing potentially the person you wanted to spend your life with. Right? Risking all of your progress both with Bambi and personally with your own self confidence simply to prove yourself enough for the one woman you had spent years both loving and loathing. Why were you so eager to possibly ruin things in the name of whatever the fuck this was?

“Stop talking,” you growled, pushing her hand away again before fisting your cock around the base and moving closer to her. 

“Not being very nice Jacob,” she quipped as you ran the head of your cock through her folds. 

“You don’t like nice, remember Tiff? So shut the fuck up or you’ll make it worse on yourself.” A half hearted threat rasped out of you as you drug your tip against her warm, wet center until you were nudging against her entrance. Pushing into her, it dawned on you why you’d so eagerly chased this need to be enough. Because you felt guilty taking what you’d wanted from Bambi, falling for her as she fell for you just the same, and offering up a love that in your opinion wouldn’t be enough because you never had been. You wanted her. You wanted what the two of you both seemingly felt for one another. But taking and having had always represented two different things in your mind. Entirely too broken to see that, despite her insistence that you were enough, it was how she truly felt. For her, you were more than enough. You were everything and she had been able to separate that from your past, and your business. Hell, she barely knew a thing about the business bare what you’d offered. She had no knowledge of your financial status, simply of your humility, morality, and your heart. 

Fuck. 

🔗🔗🔗

He stumbled through the door, pausing briefly to lean against it. Fully relying on the materials of the building surrounding him to hold up the dead weight his body felt like. Blood shot eyes, red cheeks, mussed up hair from fucking with it and attempting to smooth it down. And a nearly empty bottle of whiskey in his hand. 

Jacob Kiszka was fucked. And fucked up. 

“Sammy boy,” he yelled out in a low rumble of a voice, pushing himself off the door frame and stumbling further into the clubs main room. It was late, past closing time, but he had known Sam would still be there cleaning up and restocking the bar for the next day. In an effort to not get scolded, Jake had had enough mind to at least order an Uber to carry him in his drunken state back home. Because he couldn’t bare to be left alone in his actual home, the place pulsing with the energy Tiffany had left upon her exit. Couldn’t bare to pass out with his face buried in the pillows on his bed knowing your scent was gone and replaced by whatever faux designer perfume Tiffany wore. 

What he hadn’t expected was that you would’ve stayed over to help Sam after a particularly busy night. 

Just there to do his nightly check, as he had convinced himself. To comb through his cameras to make sure you’d been treated well and right, and that no one-Josh-handled you inappropriately. Why he had been grief stricken at the idea of his twin having you, he hadn’t pinpointed. Maybe because of the night he had burst into Josh’s home. Or perhaps because Josh had been the only one disconnected from the club enough, a mere client at that point, for you to not push him away. The thought you’d rely on and lean on him wounded Jake. As if he had a right to feel anything other than guilt. 

“Sammy,” Jake called out again, bringing the nearly spent whiskey bottle to his lips and wrapping them around the rim of it before gulping back a searing pull of it. “Fuck,” he mumbled, free hand rubbing at his reddened eyes. “Where the fuck are y-oh. Bambi.” Jake stood in his spot frozen, obviously surprised to see you still there. You mirrored his stance, your hands awkwardly locked behind your person as you stared curiously across at him. 

“Jake,” you managed, taking in his appearance. Studying his expression as he attempted to mask his shock. 

“Y/n,” he rasped lazily, the bottle in his hand being brought back to his lips before he drank slowly from it. He afforded himself the time to swallow harshly, unaffected by the warmth that spread through his chest with each drink. “Why. Why are you here?” His right arm, hand still wrapped around the bottle neck tightly with two fingers pointed over at you, outstretched in your direction as his eyes narrowed. He blinked a time or two, probably wondering if you were a mirage or a figment of his broken mind. 

“She stayed to help me clean up,” Sam came into view from behind the bar, a case of bottled beer in his arms. “Been a busy night. Why are you here? You didn’t drive did you?” 

“No,” he hiccuped, shuffling his feet toward you in an effort to close the distance you’d kept between your body and his. The physical proximity had no effect on the emotional distance between you and Jake. “Answer me,” he demanded of you, his eyes hooded and heavy in his drunken stupor. “Why are you still here Bambi?” 

“I told-,” Sam began, Jakes hand being held up practically shielding his face to cut him off. 

“Not tonight. But tonight. Ever. Any of the days. Why are you still here?” You knew he meant why hadn’t you just run off? Quit? Returned to a normal life without the burden of loving him? Pretend he never existed because it was what he deserved, in his opinion, nothing less would be deserved more. 

“I work here?” 

“Why,” he slurred, shuffling even closer still as his eyes focused on your lips, twitching as he watched you nervously lick over them. 

“Why?” You scoffed and brought your arms around to hug yourself, craving a little more distance between your body and that of the traitors. Jake wasn’t having that though, moving ever closer so his chest was ghosting against your arms.

“Why?” He further questioned, eyes begging…pleading for an end to what he’d begun. For the mess he had found himself in. 

“I can leave, if you’d like, sir.” You bit out, shoulders slumping when he whimpered almost inaudibly at the tone of your voice. You hated treating him with any type of malice, but you knew what he’d done. What he’d been doing. He couldn’t hide it. Between showing up a drunken mess, which was already entirely unlike him, to the deep purple marks trailing up his neck that you certainly hadn’t been the one to leave. He was showing his hand without even meaning to. 

“Answer me?” He begged again, completely ignoring your offer to leave as your arms dropped from your chest and you tugged anxiously at the hem of your sweater. You were ready to cry, hot tears stinging the corners of your eyes as you studied what had become of the man you’d given yourself so fully to. 

“I hope she was worth it,” you quietly responded, stepping past him then and moving to leave. You quickly grabbed your bag, waiting patiently atop the bar as you had been helping Sam, and left. 

to be continued…

tag list @that-witchy-pan  @gvfpal @godly-sinsx @jakekiszkasbuttsweat @ignite-my-fire @ohgodthefeeling-gvf @mysticalstarcatcher @shutupdevvie @takenbythemadness @wetkleenex-gvf @vanfleeter @stardustsecret @writingcold @gretavansara @sinsofstardust @idontlikelizards @gretasfallingsky @klarxtr @itsafullmoon @carlyfleet @weightofkiszka @torniturntomyarrow @jakekiszkasmommy @jaketlove @myownparadise96 @twistedmelodies @allmylovejtk @hellowgoodbye @jakesmustache

[averagemisfit03]

Sémillante

Part X word count 4830

a/n sorry this has taken so long! I’ve been sick since the start of December and put my focus elsewhere. But I promise we still have some adventuring left through the life of Sémillante! Thanks for reading and loving the little world I’ve created just as much as I do 🖤🔗

AU!JAKE KISZKA X READER

warnings minor dni, sir kink, praise kink, daddy kink? Unprotected sex, penetrative sex, implications of violence, sub/dom situations

If something was going to go wrong, it would. You knew that. All too well did you know that the second things seemed to be on the verge of being okay, something would come barreling in and knock down every pin you’d painstakingly set up. Case in point, the second Jake decided he was going to step up and tell you how he felt his ex walks in. You watched as his face portrayed every emotion you could possibly think of. Disbelief, first, twisting his features and slowly taking shape into confusion, shock and settling in fear. Or the closest thing to fear that you figured you’d ever see on Jakes face. His brown eyes wide and his plump lips twisted into a tight scowl. You hated seeing that look on such a strong, confident man. On such an intimidating man nonetheless. 

“What do you want me to do Jake?” Sammy’s voice broke through the thick silence that had encroached upon the three of you, the low rasp of it startling you momentarily. 

“She can’t be here.” It was so simple when he said it. Of course she couldn’t be there, he wouldn’t want her there. After everything he had told you about her, the way she treated him. You were relieved to hear him say those words, the breath sighing out of you heavily. 

“Okay, so I kick her out? You know that will-.” Sam was cut off by Jake booming the word “no” at him in a voice you hadn’t heard from him. As if when he opened his mouth to speak, the voice of five men speaking in unison rolled out. But it was only him there saying it. 

“She cannot be here,” he pointed to you so flippantly, as if the last several hours hadn’t happened. As if he hadn’t just claimed your body as his own and touched every part of your skin with his sinful touch. 

“Me?” You squeaked, the fear in your tone evident as Sam swallowed hard. His eyes darted between you and his older brother as you stood frozen to the spot you were in. He couldn’t possibly mean that, right? Not after professing his love to you mere hours prior to this. 

“She can’t be here,” he wouldn’t even look in your direction, his eyes on Sam as his tone darkened. As if he understood the unspoken intention in those words, Sam gave a nod and moved to you as he reached out to circle his hand around your forearm. 

“Don’t touch me, Sam.” You tried to match your tone to Jake’s, somewhere between uncaring and cold and ruthless but instead you simply sounded like a wounded animal. 

“Bambi,” he started, cutting his eyes to Jake briefly as his older brother started toward the door. 

“Don’t fucking touch me, Sam.” You demanded then, finding a little bit of strength in watching Jake literally turn his back on you. “So much for loving me huh Jacob.” 

Jake turned quickly on his heels, his palm already grasping at the handle on his office door. His jaw clenched tightly and his nostrils flared as he studied you standing there, Sam’s hand ghosting over your forearm. 

“I never.” He began as he started toward you. “Have meant something.” Another step closer “more than when I said that.” He was in front of you then, his hand wrapped loosely around your throat as his thumb pushed your chin up to look directly at him. “You can’t be here. Because it’s about to get bad.”

“That makes no sense,” you countered, unwilling to heed his warning. “I’m not leaving your side.”

“Bambi,” he bit out, his nostrils flaring again before his expression softened to you, his eyes wandering the planes of your face. “My sweet girl, I love you so much. But I need you to let Sam take you to my house. Or yours. Where ever you want as long as it isn’t here.” 

“It’s not happening Jake. I’m not leaving.” His facial expression switched back to menacing as you, again, refused. 

“You’re so fucking stubborn,” he muttered, releasing his grasp on your throat before turning back to Sam. “Where is she?” 

“Currently? The bar. With Savannah.” 

“Okay.” He blew a breath out before pulling his office door open and stepping into the hallway. You exchanged a look with Sam, positive that he was ready to restrain you if given the opportunity. You wouldn’t give him that. You bolted for the door before he could blink, nearly colliding into Jake’s back as you made it to the hall with Sam directly behind you. 

“God dammit Bambi,” he seethed, grasping tightly around your bicep. 

“I’ll fucking scream Samuel. So loud they’ll hear me in the poker room. Let go of me.”

“Just let her go,” Jake sighed, giving up as he realized he couldn’t keep you from doing this with him. And then, he was walking briskly down the hall and you hurried to catch up to him, keeping about a foot between the two of you as you made your way out into the main area of the club. He slowed halfway to the bar, his shoulders slumping and his head hanging slightly. Not even the shadow of the man you knew, whoever he suddenly became in her presence. And before you, sat on the same stool you had been on mere hours earlier when Jake had picked you up for your date, was a tall brunette. Her long, tanned legs were crossed and covered only in a short leather mini skirt. You couldn’t see her face, but you knew she would be beautiful if she were to turn around. His reaction to her presence made your heart ache, for him mostly and the things he had been through. He deserved so much better than how she had treated him. Even through his rough exterior, Jake had always remained gracious and generous with those around him. So much so, that it had been evident when talking to any of your coworkers. Even, unfortunately, Savannah. Lengthening your stride, you found yourself in step with him as you laced your fingers through his and squeezed his hand firmly. Jake glanced to his right, to you, as you offered him a supportive nod. He had this. He could do this. And you’d stand by him while he did, if he wanted that. 

Welcoming your presence, though he had previously been so adamant that you needed to leave, Jake squared his shoulders and stood up tall. 

“You’ve got this,” you whispered, hoping he believed you. “And you have me. I love you so much Jake. I’m so stupidly in love with you.” You felt him squeeze your hand in the same manner you had his, closing the distance between the bar and himself. 

“Tiffany,” he rasped, his tone confident and cold almost. Clinical in a way, he didn’t want her there and wanted everything about this interaction to prove that. 

“Jake,” the brunette turned to face him, her eyes dancing about his face before flitting to you and down to where you held his hand. “You’re looking…well.”

“And you’re looking out of place.” He countered, pulling you closer into his side. “Why are you here?”

“Business,” she turned fully then, allowing you to see the tight corset top she wore with her boobs pushed as far up and in as they could get. 

“What. Business. Could you possibly have to do in my club?” He stressed the my, releasing your hand only so he could cross his arms over his chest. 

“Well, as you may or may not know, Jacob…you’ve taken on a few business partners recently. Perhaps, if you were smarter, you’d have done a bit more digging into those people.”

“What the hell are you talking about Tiffany?” He seethed through clenched teeth. 

“Well, let me spell it out for you. Since you never were one to grasp the idea of things immediately.” Oh this chick was walking a thin line. You balled your fists up, stepping half in front of Jake as you glared at Tiffany. 

“Watch the way you speak to him,” you demanded. 

“Who the hell are you?” She chuckled, her eyebrows knitting together as you stepped closer to her. 

“Me? Oh, see I’m the person going home with him tonight. And I’m also the one who will kick your ass if you so much as consider speaking to him like that again.” 

“Bambi,” Jake started, placing a soothing hand around your wrist as he pulled you back next to him. “I love you, so much. But I have to handle this myself babe. Okay?” 

“Yeah, Bambi,” Tiffany snorted. “Fucking the help still I see? Anyway, no surprise there Jake. You should’ve looked deeper into some of your new business partners because Jace…you know the guy you took on last to complete your buy in for the I guess second location of this travesty…he’s my husband. Well. Soon to be ex, as we filed for divorce this week but. He’s agreed to liquidate 50% of his investments to me. And guess where you landed handsome?” 

“Get out of my club,” Jake seethed, a sinister smile playing over his pretty features. This was a look you hadn’t seen him wear before, and if you were to be honest it really scared the hell out of you. 

“Don’t you mean our club Jakey?” Tiffany fake pouted, batting her eyelashes at him as if that would be the very undoing of him. 

“No, I mean mine. Like I said. You’ll have no part in what I built, you forfeited that right six years ago Tiff-,” she cut him off with another chuckle before abruptly speaking. 

“Counting down to the very second it happened aren’t you? It’s good to see you haven’t moved on, not really.” She slid from the stool and stood in front of him. “My lawyer will be in touch with how involved I’d like to be with this new build Savannah told me about while I waited. I expect you’ll answer timely, won’t you Jakey? You know how impatient I get.” She tapped the tip of his nose with her pointer finger and then sauntered away as if she didn’t have a care in the world. 

A growl rumbled from deep in Jake’s chest as he spun to face Sam. 

“Close it down. Now. We’re done for the night.” With that, he grabbed your hand and pulled you back to his office where he gathered his things and then led you out to his vehicle. 

“You’re coming home with me,” he muttered as he helped you into the passenger side of his Jeep, no question about the sentiment. He was simply telling you what you were doing. The drive from Sémillante to Jakes house was quiet, which you had expected. What you hadn’t foreseen was him holding your thigh the entire way there, insisting on carrying in the flowers he had given you earlier in the evening into the kitchen once you’d arrived. Filling a vase with water and unwrapping the bouquet meticulously before inviting you up the stairs and back to his bedroom. 

“Jake, do you want to talk about what happened?” You stood leaning against the doorway of his bedroom as he rummaged through a dresser, producing a T-shirt and a pair of sweats. 

“No, not at the moment I don’t. Do you want to shower or just lay down straight away?” Why was he acting like nothing had happened? Infuriating. 

“I’d like to wash my face but…” you shrugged and he gave a nod, leading you then to the bathroom. 

“Here I have a new toothbrush in here you can have,” he pulled the medicine cabinet open and rummaged around before handing you a still packaged toothbrush. After that, you both went about some type of weird nightly routine, moving around one another as you washed your face and brushed your teeth and he did the same before leading you back to his room. You changed slowly, folding your clothes up and placing them on the arm chair that sat in the corner of the bedroom while Jake busied himself undressing and pulling a pair of sweats on. Once you had undressed, you pulled the T-shirt on that he’d gotten out for you and crawled onto the bed. Jake was only steps behind you, laying down only once you had gotten comfortable. 

“I’m ready to talk,” he sighed, turning to his side and facing you. You mimed his actions, getting comfortable on your side that faced him. 

“Okay. I’m here to listen, or whatever you need.” 

“Thank you.” He huffed a breath out, his eyes narrowing into slits as he got a far off look about him. “When Sam told me she was there, I felt like I was back in that space again when she walked away.” 

“Okay,” you frowned, mostly because you hated to know he had felt that way. And also because you weren’t sure what that meant for whatever had transpired between the two of you. You reached over and grasped at his hand, your leg moving out and pushing between his as you scooted closer to him. 

“Then when I saw her, it got worse. I felt so fucking small in that moment Bambi. And so god damn worthless.”

“But you aren’t that Jake.” 

“I know. You reminded me of that. You told me I had this.” You nodded as you agreed, you remembered saying just that to him. 

“And then you told me how in love with me you are.” 

“I did do that.” He grinned at you then, chuckling softly as he squeezed your hand and leaned in to press his lips to yours. 

“Do you know what I realized in that moment?”

“No but I hope you tell me,” you perked your brows at him. 

“Right smartass, you know I will. I realized that I had come too far to let her get the best of me, again.” 

“That’s my man.” 

🔗🔗🔗 

Two weeks. It had been two weeks since you’d so much as breathed those words to Jake. In that time, you’d managed to see him once. Sam swore it was simply that he was busy, and you’d have been willing to believe that if he had answered a text or a phone call. Any time you were scheduled to work at the club, he curiously just wasn’t there. Or his office was locked, though you had been positive he were on the other side of the door. Watching on his cameras. Drowning in the what ifs and maybes? The thought plagued you. Things had seemed fine the next morning, waking up tangled around him. He’d held you close and worshiped your body in the many ways he knew how to. But since then…well, you were sure Samuel was just being a good brother when he swore Jake was busy. The look on his face, sympathetic and full of pity, when he saw you told you he knew things you didn’t. It drove you mad. When Savannah requested you pick up a shift on a Tuesday, a day you normally didn’t work at all, you jumped at the chance in hopes of catching Jake there. 

“Bambi…what-what are you doing here?” Sam’s eyebrows raised the second he saw you breeze through the room past the bar. 

“Savannah asked me to work,” you shrugged nonchalantly, trying your best to appear as innocent as possible. He’d fall for it every time, today was no exception. 

“Oh right okay yeah. Um, Jake-.” 

“Is he here?” You perked up a little, making your way around the bar to be closer to Sam. “Is he in his office?”

“No, Bambi look.” Sam turned to face you, giving his full attention to you in that moment. “I think he went out to the second location with some of the business partners…” 

“Why does it seem like you know something that you don’t want to tell me?” Your rested your hands on your hips, all too aware of the clients that were perched around the bar. 

“You should get to work. I’m gonna need you in the poker room tonight.” Your face fell, shoulders slumping forward as you let out a low growl. 

“You’re fucking joking me, right?” 

“No. Poker room, please, Bambi.” He turned away then, readying a glass to serve someone else without affording you another glance. Your blood boiled as you marched toward the poker room, mumbling under your breath a slew of curse words that he would never hear. As you made it down the hall, closing in on the Poker Room door, you heard Jake’s unmistakable voice marrying with a higher pitched nasally laugh. You knew that laugh, though you’d only heard it one other time. 

Fucking. Tiffany. 

Spinning on your heel, you marched back to the main room with your hands balled into fists. By the time you closed in on the bar, Sam was obviously attempting to do damage control. 

“Jake, maybe you wanna take your guest to your office,” he was saying, his hands palm up held out in front of him like he was offering something up. “Sav asked Ba-.”

“Bambi,” Jake swallowed hard, his eyes flitting to the side the second he’d seen you. 

“Jake…” you marched right up to him, pushing between he and Tiffany as you reached up and placed a gentle hand to his jaw and forced his gaze back on you. 

“You haven’t been in touch…”

“We have been busy,” Tiffany crooned from behind you, eliciting an eye roll from you before you turned your head to glimpse over your shoulder at her. “Jake’s been showing me all the plans for the new location now that I’m involved. Going over design ideas and business modules. I wouldn’t expect you to know about those things.” She was smirking, down right tickled that she was getting under your skin. Without responding, you turned your attention back on Jake. 

“Jake?” You questioned softly, wondering where the hell the same energy was that he had had with her two weeks prior. The same care and effort he had put into showing you she was nothing to worry about that same night. “You haven’t called,” you repeated in a soft whisper, knowing he heard you by the way his eyes cut to yours again. His face held an expression unreadable, but his eyes were full of guilt. 

“Bambi, I really need you in the Poker Room,” Sam interjected. 

“Fuck the poker room,” you groaned, smacking your hand down atop the bar, wincing at how hard you hit it unintentionally. “Are you punishing me?” You directed the question toward Jake, knowing good and well any time you’d been made to work in there had been for punishments sake. Knowing that Jake and Sam were both well aware of how much you loathed it. 

“Yes.” Jake spoke, tone cold and empty of emotion. 

“Run along now, Bambi,” Tiffany chided, sliding onto one of the barstools. “Jake, I think tonight we should go over what type of services will be offered.” You didn’t even stick around to hear her finish, you weren’t even sure if Jake spoke after that. If asked later, you’d swear you must’ve lost hearing because all sound ceased to exist in that moment as you turned away from him and quickly made a beeline toward the one place you hated. 

The night drug on painfully slow, your knees sore and stiff from kneeling at the side of Mr. Green. For his part, knowing well how much you hated it, he didn’t ask much of you. Simply to kneel by his side and remain silent. So silent you remained, seething in jealous rage. Or was that simply anger? Hurt? You couldn’t pinpoint a single emotion, more rather they all flowed through you so freely you were sure to burst by the time Savannah walked into the room and dismissed you. You’d never been so happy to see her. 

Climbing to your feet, your rubbed at your knees before retreating from the room and further down the hall into the ladies room, the only place you could find solace in the building knowing it was meant to be like a second home for all of his girls. Someone had a crockpot of some type of dip going, a pot of coffee recently brewed as well if you had to guess based on the way the room smelt. You took little time to locate your bag and change into your a pair of jeans and a loose T-shirt, pulling your hair back into a messy bun before setting about taking your makeup off. You’d had your back to the door for a while, slowly and meticulously running a makeup wipe over your skin with care. You had the distinct feeling of being watched, but then again you almost always did when you were there. Once you were done, you gathered all of your things into the tote bag you often carried in and slung it over your shoulder. It was only then, turning to leave the room, when you caught sight of Jake leaning against the doorway. He had one foot crossed over the other at the ankle, hands crossed against his chest as he watched you silently. 

“Come to say goodnight?” You scoffed, huffing as you crossed the room and brushed by him. His arms uncrossed as you did, a firm hand grasping around your wrist so you couldn’t completely pass him. 

“Bambi.” He warned when you tried to pull away, an eyebrow raised toward you. 

“I’m off the clock, Jake. It’s y/n. And I’ll see that you unhand me, immediately, before I cause a fucking scene,” you bit out, your nostrils flaring as he turned to face you head on. 

“Oh, spend a few hours on your knees in the Poker Room and suddenly you’re a mouthy little brat aren’t you?” He bit right back, his hold on your wrist tightening. 

“Newsflash, I’ve always been this way. You however, I don’t even recognize you,” your eyebrows jumped as you gave out to him in the same tone he had used. 

“C’mon y/n, don’t act like that.” 

“Act like what? Hurt? Jaded? Angry as hell? How the fuck am I supposed to act, Jake? You’ve completely ghosted me over the last two weeks which is real weird considering the last night we spent together you were adamant about how I was so important to you.”

“You are.” He huffed, eyes narrowing as he glared at you. 

“Yeah? Prove it.” You yanked your hand from his grasp and started down the hall, Jake following closely behind. 

“I’m trying and you just keep walking away from me,” Jake growled, his hand curling around the strap of your tote and pulling you back against his chest. “We need to talk.”

“No thanks, you’ve had plenty of time over the last two weeks to say something to me and you chose to ignore me instead.”

“It wasn’t like that.” 

“Fine,” you turned to look up at him, brows raised expectantly. “What was it like then?” 

“I have to play the game, you know that. I can’t just shut her out, it has to be legally dissolved. I’m working on it.”

You stuck your tongue in your cheek, avoiding looking at him as you considered what he was saying. “That doesn’t excuse ghosting me. Avoiding me at all costs Jake. You couldn’t even look at me out there. And then you punished me for nothing just so I’d be occupied while she was here.” 

“I…” he sighed, his head hanging as he rubbed the pads of his fingers into his eyes. 

“You…what? Have no excuse. So I’m going to go, and when you decide you wanna be a man and tell the truth, you know how to get ahold of me.” You turned and left then, not bothering to afford him a look back. 

🔗🔗🔗

Jakes pov

You had ruined everything. And not because Tiffany had shaken things up, as far as you were concerned she was just another detail you needed to take care of. 

At first. 

Seeing her hurt but when y/n had reminded you of how she felt, it had all seemed so clear and obvious to you. She was your future. Hell, she had been the only woman to make you feel alive again, capable of deep adult emotions. So, why had you messed that up? At first, when you had been left alone with your thoughts, you were convinced it would be an easy task to get out of Tiffany being involved at all. But then your lawyer had called to inform you there needed to be a legal process, one that could turn lengthy and potentially nasty if she so chose it to be, just to absolve what little business relationship you’d formed with her soon to be former husband. 

It should have been easy, pretending like you appreciated her input and opinion until your lawyer could find a way around all of this. But then, it didn’t so much feel like pretending when she grabbed your arm and squeezed it tenderly, giggling at something you’d offhandedly said. Then it felt all too familiar, and your heart and your mind alike wouldn’t let you forget how head over heels you had once been. 

They wouldn’t even let you remember how terrible she’d been to you. And how much of a mess you’d been. The guilt you’d felt seeing Bambi for the first time in two weeks had been real, but not because you’d done anything physically wrong. You had been busy. Busy avoiding her. Busy admitting to yourself that you were incredibly confused. Busy reliving the love and then the loss that you’d endured all those years before. You were putting yourself through hell. 

More importantly, you were putting her through it as well. 

You couldn’t blame her for being angry, hurt, bratty. Especially after admonishing her to the one place she hated in the name of a faux punishment she’d neither earned nor deserved. And she had been right, hadn’t she? You’d done it simply to keep her occupied while Tiffany was present, because you knew at the end of the day she wouldn’t fight back against it. 

She loved you. She knew how much the club meant to you. She wouldn’t actually cause a scene. 

But you wished now that she had. Because that was a week and a half ago and so far, she had only been back to work twice. Both times she had avoided you altogether, the same as you had her previously. How could you assume it would be okay to ignore her? You could only imagine the things she had thought and felt. She hadn’t so much as spoken to Savannah ir Sam, clocking in and doing her job and then leaving at the end of her shift as if she were a stranger to everyone of you. 

She had spoken to Josh though, a fact he’d rubbed in your face as often as he could. Because Josh had neither done anything wrong nor taken sides, although if asked you’d swear he’d chosen her over you anyway. Which as of current, was exactly what he was doing. 

“All I’m saying is, you’ve fucked up like three times now. How many chances do you think you deserve?” He was relaxed back into the leather sofa in your office, legs crossed in the same manner he often sat as he sipped from a to go cup of coffee from a local shop. His curly hair, recently trimmed much shorter on the sides than usual, were wildly sticking out in every which direction. Somehow, the hairdo paired perfectly with the khakis and long sleeved white t-shirt he wore. Dressed down, in his words, as he simply existed until his next film job would take him off to Norway. 

“I just figured she would at least hear me out. She knows what this club and the new location mean to me. She knows I have to do this the right way.”

“And the right way was fucking off up Tiffany’s ass without so much as communicating with your girlfriend. Didn’t you tell her you loved her?”

“I do love her.”

“Yeah, see Jake, I don’t think that translated well when you completely ignored her,” your older brother shrugged carelessly before pulling another drink from his cup. “You know she thinks you slept with Tiffany.”

“Why would she even assume that?” The words bit out of you, yet the guilt ate you up. Emotionally, you had already betrayed her. 

“Be foreal,” Josh faked a yawn and stood. “Anyway, I have to go. We are meeting for lunch.”

“If you make a move on my girl.” 

“Which one?” He smirked playfully before sauntering from your office, leaving you speechless in his wake. 

Which one? 

Well. Which one? 

tag list @that-witchy-pan  @gvfpal @godly-sinsx @jakekiszkasbuttsweat @ignite-my-fire @ohgodthefeeling-gvf @mysticalstarcatcher @shutupdevvie @takenbythemadness @wetkleenex-gvf @vanfleeter @stardustsecret @writingcold @gretavansara @sinsofstardust @idontlikelizards @gretasfallingsky @klarxtr @itsafullmoon @carlyfleet @weightofkiszka @torniturntomyarrow @jakekiszkasmommy @jaketlove @myownparadise96 @twistedmelodies @allmylovejtk @hellowgoodbye @jakesmustache

[averagemisfit03]

Sémillante

Part IX

AU!JAKE KISZKA X READER

word count 5,429

warnings minor dni, sir kink, praise kink, daddy kink? Unprotected sex, penetrative sex, implications of violence, sub/dom situations

It wasn’t as if you had never been on a first date, clearly the first date with Daniel had been a dinner out at a nice restaurant in downtown Nashville. With Chad, your first date had been to play putt putt golf with some friends who had set you up. Neither time had you felt as anxious as you felt as you prepared for your first actual date with Jake. 

Sure, things had happened in an odd order but since the night of the event at Sémillante, you both had been so busy that spending any alone time together had been nearly obsolete. That was a week and a half ago. He’d requested your presence Monday night for dinner on Wednesday and, though you’d felt perhaps it was because you’d pouted and all but threw yourself onto the sofa in his office as you whined about how busy he had been, Jake had insisted that it was only right that he take you on a proper date. You spent most of the day at your 9-5 contemplating where he might take you, what you should wear. Mentally, you’d been through your closet no less than eight times trying to piece together an outfit that may impress him before finally giving up and texting him for at least a hint of where he may be taking you. 

But that message had gone unanswered, annoyingly enough. You’d agreed to meet him at the club at 6:30, but you’d been perched on a barstool chitchatting with Sam for the last fifteen minutes and Jacob hadn’t shown up in that time. 

“He’ll be here Bambi, he just ran out before you arrived. Promise. He’s really excited,” Sam assured you, sliding a Shirley Temple across the bar top to you. 

“Nearly twenty minutes late for our first real date, Samuel. What am I supposed to feel over this?” Okay, so you were perhaps a tad bitter about his inability to arrive on time. Your hand wrapped around the glass that he had handed you, leaving finger prints in the moisture that was already collecting along the sides as you lifted it up and pulled back a long drink of the nonalcoholic beverage. 

“I don’t think he intentionally is late. You know how traffic gets,” Sam offered, grimacing as Savannah approached and came to stand near where you sat. 

“Sam, we don’t let employees drink while on the clock,” she warned and you watched as, with a tight smile that didn’t quit touch his cheeks, he turned his attention to her. 

“Lucky for us Bambi isn’t on the clock, and she’s not drinking.” You shook your glass at her as she watched you, a smirk pulling the corners of your mouth up. 

“Nonalcoholic Sav.” Your eyebrows perked as you took another drink before placing the glass back onto the bar with a clinking sound ringing out. 

“I think your date is here little deer,” Sam chided, amused by the tone you’d taken with Savannah. He gestured over your shoulder with a nod so, curiously, you turned your body on the barstool just in time to see Jake walking in with a bouquet of white roses in his hands. Out of your peripheral you could see Savannah turn to watch him saunter closer, her mouth hanging slack jawed. 

“You’ve got to be fucking joking me,” she said quietly through grit teeth. “Fucking roses?!” 

“Hey baby,” Jake crooned as he reached you, his free arm snaking around your waist as he kissed your cheek. “Sorry, I left to pick up your flowers and there was an accident that held traffic up.” How could you be mad about that? In short, you couldn’t. Even if you wanted to, he’d left simply to buy you flowers and late or not the gesture alone had endeared you. Chad had never, Daniel had never. He handed the flowers to you once he’d released his hold on you, watching with a grin as you sniffed at them before peering up at him through your lashes. 

“You didn’t have to do this,” you offered softly, your eyes falling back to the flowers as you brought them up to smell again. Your eyes fluttered closed briefly before you snapped them open, remembering that you were still in the middle of the club surrounded by coworkers. “They’re gorgeous though Jake, thank you so much.” You hopped from the barstool and pressed a kiss to his lips before turning back, a grin settling over your features, to bid Sam and Savannah goodbye. 

“You ready?” Jake questioned, grabbing your hand and lacing his fingers together with yours before pulling you away. 

“Bye Bambi,” Sam called out as he went back to work and, before Jake could pull you through the exit, you gave a final look over your shoulder to where Savannah still stood with a look of disgust - or perhaps anger - blanketing her face. 

🔗🔗 

“I know this is probably not what you were envisioning when I asked you out on a proper date…” Jake rasped around a mouth full of fries as you sat opposite him in the small hole in the wall burger joint he had taken you to. The relaxed, casual atmosphere had you thankful you’d worn jeans instead of dressing up more than necessary. Not to say the place wasn’t up to your standards, because you’d breathed a sigh of relief when he’d pulled his car into the parking lot. You had just been surprised to learn Dino’s was his favorite spot. 

“Honestly, Jake,” you started as your glass of soda up and sipped through the straw before continuing. “Anything would have been great as long as it were you taking me there, so this is perfect.” You offered him a half smile as you reached forward and stole a fry from his plate and brought it to your mouth before munching on it. 

“Do you mean that?” He spoke around another mouth full of food, one hand holding his burger while the other shielded his mouth as he spoke. 

“Yeah of course. I don’t know if you’ve figured it out yet, Jake, but money doesn’t really impress me. It’s about intention and the thought behind things.” He nodded, his eyes falling to his near empty plate as he chewed over what you said. For a while, it remained silent between you as you both finished up your food but by the time his was gone and you were on your last bite you’d both picked back up with casual conversation about seemingly mundane things. 

“Bambi?” Jake questioned as you pulled a napkin from the dispenser and wiped the grease from your hands. 

“Yeah?” Your eyes flitted over to him as you took a final drink from your cup, his fingers playing over the glass of beer in front of him. 

“You never cease to amaze me. Do you know that?” He offered you a genuine smile, reaching across the table and slotting his fingers through yours before gesturing to the door. “Let’s get out of here hm?” 

🔗🔗🔗

 Jakes POV

Six years I had spent avoiding any semblance of a real relationship. At first, I was so fucked from the loss of Tiffany that I couldn’t think straight. My days rolled into nights so rapidly with me clinging to the edge of my sanity, until Savannah set me straight. She had quite literally slapped the dumb fuck out of me, in her words, and told me to snap out of it. I was better than that and I had a business to run. I thought for so long that she had done me a favor, pulling me back from the brink of self destruction, bringing her dads oldest friend in and introducing us. 

Meeting Vance had been a god send, the way he helped me turn the club into something that I could make money off of. When I showed him the business plan for Sémillante he had wanted to be a part of it immediately, as a client of course. Never one to pass up an opportunity to enjoy a night of poker surrounded by beautiful, obedient, women. I had to roll my eyes at that, but of course he was an older gentleman and his outlook on things were varied from my own. Between his help in turning my first club around, I had been able to save back enough to start the build on Sémillante after about four years. I didn’t want any debt, it had to all be paid for up front or I’d feel like I owed someone something. I hate that feeling. So Josh had let me live with him when I’d moved out of the home I’d shared with Tiffany, he was so rarely around anyway it was like living alone. And I’d saved every single penny I could, and Vance helped me network until networking felt more like meeting up with old friends and suddenly I was surrounded by Nashvilles wealthiest. Also, perhaps, it’s filthiest. Men who walked the line between right and wrong, legal and illegal, and left very little space to wonder which side they were on. Men who wouldn’t think twice to take care of someone else’s problem for the right price. My reputation was so far removed from who I truly was that I began to lose myself to it. 

And then there was the relationship with Sav. Without an emotional connection, I felt like what we had going between us was a good thing. A means to an end so to speak, as most days it kept me from seeking out the company of a woman I would rather forget than spend additional time with after the fact. I would take care of her needs as long as she fulfilled mine and I suppose that’s what she did through that time. Sure, there were moments where things were hot and heavy and moments where we ran the course like tepid water. If I knew what would be waiting for me down the line, I wondered frequently if I’d have ever began that relationship. She hindered me more than enhanced my life and truthfully, the only thing I could thank her for was hiring the only person I’d stopped to really look at in that time. 

The second I saw her I knew, likely my soul had been searching her out in every life. Likely I had walked through darkness knowing at some point light would come and it would be her. The thought, however, was frightening. I felt incredibly consumed by it the day she started, and the moment I saw her. My eyes flitting over her face and along the soft curve of her beautiful body. Taking in her nervous demeanor and the way she so readily called me sir without question. I was a goner. Fucked. Dead man walking. That was me. If it was a crime to fall hopelessly and helplessly in love, I’d be locked away for life times. It was intense, the revelation that after six years a single moment in time could unravel every single brick I had painstakingly placed around my cold, black heart. Running from it would be useless, as I had proven to myself quite quickly that there was no escaping this fate. Destined to either face it, and hopefully find happiness, or run from it. Determined, though, to ruin it before it could even begin. I wanted her to think me a hard ass, to be a little scared. To maybe, if she knew what was good for her, walk away before it got too deep. But she just wouldn’t. 

Bambi was persistent. Not only in her desire to better her craft and keep her job, but also in her want to please. To please herself, to please me, to please our clients. 

That was why I had led her to Daniel. She, I knew, would go above and beyond to ensure that he wanted to return to the club. That he enjoyed what he saw and, perhaps in some small way, would want to have more of it. Nothing could have foretold the way I’d react to watching her do exactly what I asked of her. 

Show Daniel why she was my very best girl. 

She had done so well that my jealous streak, dormant for the better part of the last several years, came out to play once again and I hadn’t even lent a second thought to what I was doing before I’d found myself buried beneath the weight of the hole I had dug. 

I had gotten a taste of the sweetest sin. And dear god was I a fucking needy sinner. 

But I’d hurt her in the process, she couldn’t even look in my direction without the damage I had done being evident. I had no way to make it better, by that time she had moved on to dating Daniel and I ought to have been happy about that. She’d convinced him to buy into the business, and I got to keep my concrete castle just as sturdy and vacant as I liked. Somewhere in all the madness of watching that happen, I had finally realized what was happening within me. And maybe my response to that wasn’t appropriate, sleeping with her again hadn’t been part of the plan. It would be so much easier if I had simply forgotten about her, but I just couldn’t. The overwhelming need to get her out of my system was all I could think about. Just one more time, and then I could go back to how things had been. Obviously one more time never works when it comes to matters of the heart, I was smart enough to know that. But still fucking stupid enough to believe I could just call it what it was, me being infatuated, and move on. 

It wasn’t that at fucking all. 

I knew it waking up to her in my bed, I knew it again finding her at Josh’s house and wrapped in his shirt. I knew it again without a doubt as I sat across from her in that hole in the wall burger joint. I could’ve taken her somewhere nice. Fuck, I should have. Why had she forgiven me readily so many times? One thing I knew looking at her as we walked, hand in hand, from the small restaurant toward my car was that I had to do better. She, at the very least, deserved it. 

“Y/n?” She peered over at me, an eyebrow perked as she waited for me to continue and I breathed out a slow breath before cracking a little smile her way. “Your ass looks phenomenal in those jeans.” She giggled, the sound soft and lilting as I pulled her close to my side and wrapped my arm around her shoulders. “There’s a place I wanna take you, if you’re okay with that…” with her consent I led us both to my Jeep, helping her into the passenger side before sliding behind the steering wheel and driving us in the direction of the far south part of town. It had been growing dark for some time, the sun cresting the horizon as the moon came out to play. The drive was quiet as she watched the world erase as I drove, my right hand resting on the inside of her thigh as my fingertips danced over the rough denim of her jeans. When we finally pulled up to the empty plot of land, just on the edge of town before the city became riddled with more trees than businesses and houses, I cleared my throat to catch her attention. Plenty of construction equipment and items laid about where concrete had been poured and sat waiting for the bones of the building that would live there. 

“So. I’ve kept the second location pretty much a secret except for the construction company doing the build. Vance doesn’t know. Daniel doesn’t know. They’ve seen blueprints of what it will look like but…I wanted…you to be the first to see the land.” I couldn’t even look at her as I spoke, nervousness causing my voice to shake as I pushed my door open and stepped out of the vehicle. By the time I got to the front of the Jeep, she was already out and meeting me there as well. 

“Why me? You should want to show Sam this or Josh,” she protested as I grabbed her hand, lacing my fingers with hers as I pulled her along. 

“Because they’ll see it once the bones go up. But you. I dunno…” I trailed off as I worried my lips, finally brushing my tongue over them to wet them before speaking again. “Just wanted you to be the first.” I could tell she was watching me as I stepped away from the warmth of her proximity, leading her around the parameter of the entire concrete slab as I pointed out where I wanted each room to be. She listened intently, silent other than her mmhmm’s and uh huh’s until we got back to my Jeep. 

“I love that you showed me this. I know you’re excited for it all.” 

“I love….” Nope. We aren’t doing that today. Her wide eyes rounded out as she waited for me to continue, swallowing hard at my almost submission of endearment. Fuck. I should just say it. “Fuck it. I love you Bambi, I know things have been…odd since the night of the event, I’ve been so damn busy and I should’ve said it that night too. Not just that you were mine. But that I love you. It fucking drives me insane, it’s driving me insane. I haven’t felt like this in so long that I really don’t know what to do with myself…” she cut me off with her lips pressing feverishly to mine, the tip of her tongue darting out and licking over my bottom lip as I groaned into her mouth. 

🔗🔗🔗

Y/N pov

The drive back to Sémillante was silent for the most part, Jake only offering little information here and there about what he wanted for the second location. You felt stunned still at his display of adoration and the way, after walking you back to the jeep, he had pressed you into the cool metal of the door and let his mouth wander over your jaw and neck for several minutes before you shivered beneath the chilly air of the night. 

“I have some work to do tonight, but if you wanna hang out in my office with me…” he cleared his throat as he pulled into the parking lot. 

“Yes…sir.” You couldn’t help but smirk as he shot you a warning look as he backed into his normal parking spot. You knew even if he had work you were more than prepared to demand his attention tonight. Especially after that. Once parked, Jake led you into the building and down the hall to his office without so much as stopping to announce himself to Sam. You followed him into the dark room, barely giving him a chance to turn a light on before you were pressing against him. On your tiptoes to reach, you pressed your mouth to the shell of his ear and pressed a kiss there. 

“Tell me again,” you begged, unsatisfied with the amount of time you’d had with him before leaving the property. Unsatisfied with the way you had responded, with actions rather than words, and knowing it had taken him a lot to even say what he’d said. 

“Bambi wanna hear me tell her I love her again?” You could hear the amusement in his voice, teasing you but he still sounded so damn commanding and in control. 

“Please,” you all but whimpered as he spun around and enveloped you in his arms. 

“Why?” An eyebrow rose as he studied you silently, the low bass from the music being played in the main room reverberating through the walls just enough to let it be known that you weren’t alone. 

“So I can say it back,” you offered simply, biting into your lower lip as you looked up at him in the same manner you had the first day you’d met. 

“Oh,” softly, his voice hushed into the space between the two of you. As if he hadn’t considered you’d say it back. As if he hadn’t figured you felt the same. “Well y/n, I love you. I think I’ve loved you since the moment I saw you.” 

The effect those words had on you, warmth spreading over your body in a dizzying rush as you grinned so wide your cheeks began to hurt. “I love you too…sir.” Just to be a little coy and cute, press his buttons just enough, you had to add the sir on. But Jake wasn’t letting you get away with that so easily, his hands falling to your hips and grasping you tightly as he walked you back ward his desk. 

“Are you trying to start something you may not be able to finish little girl?” He purred, his voice low and just raspy enough that you could tell he was turned on. 

“I can always finish it,” you challenged, a smirk tugging the corners of your lips up as he shook his head-an incredulous look about him before he spun you by your hips to face away from him. His hands fell to the button of your jeans as he bit at a spot on your neck, eliciting a hiss from you as your head fell back onto his shoulder. 

“We will see about that,” he cooed, pressing his tongue flat against the skin of your neck and dragging it up to your earlobe where he nipped the sensitive skin between his teeth just enough to pull a noise from you. He sucked the skin into his mouth, his plush warm lips wrapping around it as he ran the tip of his tongue along the edge of your earlobe. 

“Jake,” you whined, noticing that his fingers had begun to undo the button on your jeans and roll the zipper down slowly. 

“It’s sir in here,” he corrected, one hand falling from the fly of your jeans and smacking against your thigh before squeezing roughly. 

“Sorry, sir,” you swallowed hard as he drug his fingertips toward your inner thigh, grasping again and pulling your legs further apart than they already were. 

“You should keep in mind…little deer…” he sounded winded already as his fingers pushed under the sides of your jeans and pushed them down over your hips and thighs until you could easily step out of them. “I’m the one in charge in here…” his hands moved then to your top and pulled it up over your stomach to rest just under your breasts as he bunched the fabric up in his fists. “And just because I love you,” his voice took on a gravelly tone as he continued on. “Doesn’t mean I will hesitate to punish you for misspeaking.” 

“Okay sir,” you bit back a giggle but your lilting tone gave it all away and you heard him scoff as he pulled your top up and off of you before tossing it aside to lay in a heap on top of your jeans. 

“Bambi,” his hand cracked against the supple skin of your ass then, his fingers curling around the lace edge of your underwear and pulling gently before releasing the delicate material and stepping back from you. “Take the rest of it off.” You spun to face him, challenging him as you stood there unmoving. 

“Tell me again sir,” you sighed, your ass leaning back against the edge of the desk. 

“Take. It. Off.” 

“Not that.” 

“God dammit Bambi, don’t be a brat,” he was already against you again, pressing you further against the desk as he rocked his hips against yours, letting you feel how hard he had grown beneath the pants he wore. 

“Fuck,” you muttered, quickly reaching behind you to undo your bra. 

“That’s what I thought,” he conceded, a smirk once again dancing on his lips as he gave you room to follow his instructions. You let the straps fall over your shoulders before removing the garment fully, dropping it next to you and pushing your underwear down and stepping out of them. Jake sucked his teeth as he watched, regarding you in admiration before him before beginning toward you again. “I should make you wait, you know…” He spun you to face away from him, rutting his hips against your ass so aggressively that it pressed yours harshly into the wood of the desk. The pain bit at your skin pinched there as you hissed. “build up…the…anticipation.” He finished directly against your ear, pulling the back of his pointer and middle finger down between your breasts and over your abdomen, circling around your navel as the muscles beneath your skin jumped and spasmed at his touch. 

“What do you think Bambi?” He breathed against your cheek, pressing the side of his face to yours as his knuckles grazed lower over your skin. “Should I let it build…until you can’t stand it anymore? Beg me to fuck this pretty pussy?”

“Jake please,” the words choked out of you as his middle finger pulled slowly through your folds. 

“Oh, now you want to be a good little deer issit?” He was fucking with you, his head dipping in and allowing his lips to press against the heated skin of your neck as he sucked lightly over the spot. 

“Yes,” you sighed, whimpering at the feel of his lips on your neck and his finger connecting with your clit and winding tight circles over it. “Be so good for you.” 

“Be so good for me?” He repeated as his lips pressed kisses down your neck and along your shoulder. 

“Yes.”

His finger stopped its work as he pulled his hand back and smacked your thigh harshly, pulling a hiss from between your lips. “Manners sweet Bambi.” 

“Yes sir.” You swallowed hard as he brought a hand up and wrapped it loosely over your throat, working his belt unbuckled with the other. 

“That’s my girl. Be such a good girl for me hm? Do whatever I say?” 

“Yes sir.” Jakes hand moved around to press between your shoulder blades, pushing you forward to lean over his desk. You pressed your palms to the top, bracing yourself in order to not bend completely over in the name of giving him a hard time still. 

“You said you’d be good,” he chided when you didn’t follow his full instructions. 

“There’s just all this paper work. I’d hate to ruin it.” Your smart mouth may actually get you into trouble tonight. 

“Right,” he cooed, reaching around you and brushing all of the paper work that had been scattered atop his desk, sending it flying to the floor. 

“Jake!” A hand cracked against your thigh again as he tsk’d at you. 

“No more papers. Now…you promised to be a good girl didn’t you?” His hand was at your back again, this time you let him guide you further until your forearms were resting on the desk and you were bent at the waist. 

“Yes sir,” you mumbled, listening to the clang of his belt as he moved to undo his pants and free his cock from its confines. You could feel him fist his length and drag his palm over his shaft behind you before grabbing his cock at the base and pushing it throw your folds and gathering your slick arousal over his length. The head caught over your clit on the pull back, eliciting a high pitched moan from you. Jake spent a few moments longer teasing you before settling himself at your entrance, nudging against it before pushing into you slowly. His eyes remained fixed on where his length slowly disappeared into your greedy cunt and then pulled back out to the tip. He waited until you whined his name, his hand grasping for purchase in the hair at the back of your head and yanking it back as he pushed fully into you, burying himself to the hilt before beginning a grueling pace at which he pumped into you at. 

“Lemme hear that pretty mouth Bambi, got nothing smart to say now huh,” he taunted, each thrust of his hips pushing a stuttered breath out of you in an ‘uh uh uh’ noise. His pace was getting harsher, each thrust forward saw him using his tight grip of the hair at the nape of your neck to pull you back onto him. 

“Fuck. Fuck me harder sir,” you tried to mirror his taunting but the shake in your voice surely gave you away as you moaned out. 

“Ohh you really are trying to be such a good girl aren’t you? My filthy good girl,” he gritted out, his teeth clenching together as he fucked into you wild and aggressive. 

“Yes daddy,” you whined, unable to bite back the words. Your eyes widened only for a moment, the fear of that being a turn off for him buzzing through your veins as you tensed up. But Jakes pace didn’t falter, in fact his grip on your hair loosened and he grasped harshly at both of your hips as he continued pulling you back onto him with each thrust until your walls were fluttering and clenching around him. You could feel his length pulsing against your walls as he growled out in response to you. 

“Fuck. Fuck that’s right. Let loose for me Bambi, you’re right there I can fucking tell. Soak my cock,” his voice had turned low and raspier than normal and you knew he was just as close as you were. 

“Tell me again,” you pled, desperate to hear the sweet words he had said in the filthy aggressive tone he currently wore like a suit of armor. 

“I love you. I fucking love you,” he groaned as you clenched around him and threw your head back, panting out his name like a mantra you had long since memorized as your orgasm rippled through you. Jake was seconds behind you, his warm release painting your walls as he moaned out your name in a husky rasp before collapsing against you. His chest was covered in sweat and slick as he rested against you, taking a few moments to catch his breath before pulling his softening cock from you. 

“God damn Bambi.” You stood and turned to face him, looking incredibly fucked out with your cheeks painted red from exertion and arousal. “My fucking girl knows how to take me.” He chuckled before pressing several kisses to your lips, holding you close to him for a moment before pulling away and picking your clothes up for you. “Go clean up,” he nodded toward the bathroom. “We’ll go back to my place and have some wine.” 

You followed his direction, taking your clothes and stepping into his personal bathroom to clean up and redress. It took you only a few minutes to right yourself, taking an extra look in the mirror as you smoothed your hair down. You could hear Jake talking in a low voice to someone and rather than stand and eavesdrop, you simply re-entered the room only to find Jake standing there looking forlorn and troubled and Sam standing near the door. When had he gotten there? You hadn’t heard him come in at all. 

“W-what’s going on?” You questioned, moving closer to Jake as he barely acknowledged your presence. 

“She can’t be here,” he muttered in disbelief. “Sam are you sure?”

“Positive,” Sam grimaced, his eyes darting between the two of you. 

“Sorry. Who is here?” You were so confused suddenly, which you hated feeling. After a moment of silence it seemed obvious that Jake wouldn’t be offering up any information so you turned to Sam, knowing he would fill you in whether Jake wanted him to or not. 

“Tiffany. Tiffany is here.”

“Okay? Who is Tiffany?” 

“His ex.” Sam’s eyebrows perked as he said it, Jake making some sort of guttural noise next to you that sounded much like a cross between a scoff and a gasp. 

“Fuck,” Jake bit out finally, pushing a nervous hand through his hair as he swallowed back the spit that had collected at the back of his mouth. “FUCK.” 

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where are the jobs for useless people who can't handle anything at all