becauseitsrelevant

[becauseitsrelevant]

A post about romantic relationships

so I’ve been in a relationship for 5 years now. And I see a lot of posts about how people think relationships mean having butterflies forever, your heart beating faster when they walk into a room, about cuddling together every night, legs intertwined, that you’d be so happy to live together you’d sleep on a double bed with each other every night.

And its not really like that, at least not to me.

You stop getting the butterflies when you live together. Your heart no longer speeds up when you see them, but instead, everything calms down. When youre in the room with them, you feel calm, and secure. When you cuddle them you feel your heart beat slow, and the sound of their breathing carry you towards comfort. It doesnt feel like a roller coaster anymore, it feels like home.

You don’t sleep curled up with each other every night, legs twisted between theirs so tight its hard to tell where yours begin and theirs end.

Instead, you sleep comfortably, side by side, sometimes facing different directions. But every night, you find yourself scooting backwards on the bed so you bump into them. You snuggle against their arm, or stroke their hair as they fall asleep. There are nights when my boyfriend, in his sleep, reaches around me and pulls me to him, like a child with his teddybear, like I am his comfort.

 In the wee hours of the morning before the dawn breaks, when the world is blue and you see through cracked eyes, you curl into their chest and inhale their scent before drifting back to sleep. 

Kisses aren’t always romantic and firey anymore. But there are so much more of them now. There are cold kisses when you’re eating ice cream in the summer, and sticky kisses over breakfast pancakes. There’s “im leaving now” kisses, and “one more kiss before you go” kisses. There’s sleepy morning kisses before work, when you don’t remember the alarm going off but instead the press of their lips against yours is what brings you into the day.

There’s kisses before sleep, and, you are so sweet with the things you do kisses. There’s kisses because you treat animals so tenderly, and I’m so glad i’m with you and not someone else kisses. There’s quick kisses in the aisles of the grocery store, when its loud and you gravitate together, when instead of having your own personal space and their own personal space, its both of yours together, and you step into their chest to take up less area together. 

You don’t always text each other with confessions of love and care like you used to, because that’s a given now, and you’ve moved on to quirky inside jokes about the life youve built together. You share looks of exasperation and amusement in public, your own little world against the outside one. 

Relationships aren’t always a fairy tale. They’re not always fireworks and sparks, at least, after the start.

But they are a quiet rhythm and hum of love and care. It’s not a fire in your soul, but one in your hearth, keeping you warm and comfortable, comforting you as you drowsily drift into sleep.

And I love that.

[becauseitsrelevant]

“Sometimes when you meet someone, there’s a click. I don’t believe in love at first sight but I believe in that click.”

— Ann Aguirre, Blue Diablo (via fuckinq)

[becauseitsrelevant]

y’all really weren’t listening when taylor said so i wander through these nights, i prefer hiding in plain sight, my fourth drink in my hand these desperate prayers of a cursed man, spilling out to you for free, but darling, darling, please, you wouldn't take my word for it if you knew who was talking, if you knew where i was walking, to a house, not a home, all alone 'cause nobody's there, where i pace in my pen and my friends found friends who care, no one sees when you lose when you're playing solitaire.

[becauseitsrelevant]

girl help i can't stop seeing patterns in life and the interconnectedness of everything

[becauseitsrelevant]

how do you just get up and deal with the fact that there’s a last time for everything. there was a last time you sat on your dads shoulders and there was a last time your mom tucked you into bed. there’s going to be a last time you kiss your sister on the head and there’s going to be a last time you hug your best friend. there’s going to be a last time you feel exactly as you feel right now and there’s going to be a last time that person says i love you. i need to lay down

[becauseitsrelevant]

i would've made for such a good fucking cat life's so unfair

[becauseitsrelevant]

never grow up has always hit hard but in the wake of would’ve could’ve should’ve…………… god

[becauseitsrelevant]

sorry but I am not subscribing to our society's disgusting obsession with youth. when I turn 30 I'm going to be really happy and throw a party and be elated at how much I will have grown by then, the same way I did when I turned 10 and celebrated finally being 'double digits'. When I turn 40 I will be ecstatic. There are good and bad things about every age but there is no way my 20s are going to be the best years of my life because I am still barely getting to know myself. By 30 I hope to be very well-acquainted

[becauseitsrelevant]

something people don’t appreciate enough is the fact that different songs on midnights explore the same topics in numerous, sometimes contradictory ways. on snow on the beach, she’s scared that a new relationship might not work out; on labyrinth, she’s terrified that it might. snow on the beach also talks about the celestial forces that bring two people together; mastermind confesses that she was the force in question all along. bejeweled describes the confidence and freedom of bending the rules of a relationship; high infidelity is filled with guilt and terror for simply dancing with another guy. she takes the money on you’re on your own, kid, but she feels stifled by it on anti-hero. she ends you’re on your own, kid with inspiring words; on dear reader, she warns the audience not to listen to her advice. she burns in hell on anti-hero, but karma is her god on karma. she can face any struggle fame throws at her on you’re on your own, kid, but she’s too soft for all of it on sweet nothing. she’s a diamond and a monster on the hill at the same time. it’s almost like each story is told from multiple perspectives like the love triangle on folklore, but instead of several fictional characters, the narrators all exist in different corners of taylor’s mind.

[becauseitsrelevant]

women don’t owe men SHIT but if you see jack antonoff or aaron dessner you DO owe them a little pat on the head

[becauseitsrelevant]

therapy isn’t enough, i need tickets to the eras tour

[becauseitsrelevant]

I think life was trying to teach me lessons this week. It reminded me to be grateful for electricity with a 12 hour power outage. It reminded me to be grateful for my health with having covid after having a super cold for 5 weeks. It reminded me to be grateful for people in my life and their kindness and being able to see them. It reminded me that I do enjoy being at my job (most of the time).

#I’m not always a ‘everything happens for a reason’ person but I think I am more often than not #it also gave me the opportunity to stay home and get Taylor swift tickets so there’s that

[becauseitsrelevant]

never grow up has always hit hard but in the wake of would’ve could’ve should’ve…………… god

[becauseitsrelevant]

me when i'm on the schoolbus at 6:43AM listening to fake plastic trees on my ipod touch and thom yorke says "it wears her out.......it wears her out" in the saddest most exhausted-sounding voice and i'm fully convinced i'm being crushed by the entire weight of the world and all human suffering because i'm in the seventh grade

[becauseitsrelevant]

[becauseitsrelevant]

[becauseitsrelevant]