Was making soup for lunch and coming up with rhymes about it (like some sort of gnome). Ended with my bff and I making a short poem. I do calligraphy and yeah:
Ok but actually that sounds awesome. I would love to be 2 apples tall sitting in the back booth of a sleazy but cozy little Cafe nestled in the core of a dead tree stump. I wanna shake the hands of the termites that did the molding work on these walls. There's a mole in the next booth over, moving its nose tendrils over the braille on the bark-paper menu. The air is thick with nutmeg smoke, so I peel open a little window next to my booth and prop it open with a twig. The lass that trots on over to me to take my order is a shy thing, or at least pretends to be. The little titter in the way she speaks isn't unfamiliar. It's either flirting, or she's from the toadstools a few glades over; their accents always give people trouble. I order a single slice of peach dusted with sugar, and she asks me if I might need a little help finishing off a plate that big. I smile and raise a hand, tell her no, I've got plenty of appetite. She giggles and flutters off to the kitchen. I make a note not to trust her with my heart. Advice I'm almost sure not to take.
Easter egg for office workers: if you go onto Excel and press ctrl+left, then ctrl+down, you will reach cell XFD1048576. If you put a dot in there, then ctrl+A and fill every cell in black, you can then print 34 million black pages from your office printer and get fired
Hey guys just a heads up there's a new scam going around where a gnome will disguise itself with orc facts and then steal all your berries. Stay safe out there.