clarentheir

[clarentheir]

           ❝   I know— what they said— about this sparkly shit— !   ❞   THAT   doesn’t do much to halt the Saber’s swings, the crimson hilt all the more dazzling as it bounced off the diamonds’ brilliant glow. Mordred could live with not sleeping in a bed for a night, especially since the alternative wasn’t immediately to downgrade to a crypt, but... Well, it’s the principle of the thing ! There was nothing more infuriating than the door being right there behind this deceptively flimsy-looking ‘snow’ ! 

           ❝   But I’ve gotten crazier things accomplished !   ❞   Not to mention there were a couple perfectly good, totally vulnerable burgers left sitting in there unattended... !     

#that kitchen is gonna smell like absolute shit when this event's over #local knight of rebellion rebels against a door and is doomed to a stalemate. more at eleven #EVENT : shine bright. #isola mini #i will either make an open for diamond monster fighting later or make a smol starter call featuring diamond yetis; either/or

[clarentheir]

crestblight​:

✦ “That still doesn’t strike me as correct. After all, is there something festive about punching?”

        ❝   Bein’ festive means people are in good spirits, right ?  Plenty of people punch when they’re happy. I mean... What else could it mean, right ?   ❞   PEOPLE   also punch when they’re angry. Or hurt. Or sad. Or... Well, none of that was relevant. 

#crestblight #took the words right out of mo's mouth #sometimes christmas even comes early

[clarentheir]

crestblight​:

✦ “I don’t really understand these holiday lyrics. ‘Deck the halls’? Why would you punch the halls? Sounds painful…”

         ❝   You sure ya didn’t mishear it ?  Maybe they meant ‘deck the walls’. Punchin’ a hall one wall at a time.   ❞

#crestblight #what like you've never punched a whole hallway before??

[clarentheir]

          ❝   Man, everyone who comes up here puts up so little fight. It’s getting downright embarrassing... !   ❞   AND   that was even with pulling punches, something Mordred only considered because it was snow and not a legitimate fight !  Maybe the stronger people in this place were too uptight to enjoy a good snowball fight or two... ? 

#isola mini #you know when a kid climbs to the top of that giant jungle gym structure and acts like they're king of the mountain?? that but snow #FES : winterfes.

[clarentheir]

cometform​:

          “Well now– pretty confident in that, are ya?“ Why wouldn’t she be? There’s little room for doubt in that train of thought… at least in this particular circumstance. There is one nagging issue about all this… but hopefully he can manage to push it down by the time the moment of truth comes. Bringing it up now is only bound to cause more trouble…

     It doesn’t take long for the silence to grow somewhat awkward as Saber kept tapping away on her electronic device. Her eventual admission of ignorance got an exasperated sigh out of the Greek hero, one end of his lance giving the ground a pronounced tap.

          “Seriously? Geez– that’s one way to hit a road block, I guess…“ Oh well, it’s only a small bump. Besides, this gives him more time to put his concerns to rest so nothing gets in the way of this impromptu duel. “Fine, fine– not like I have anything better to do. I’ll just follow your lead then, Saber.”

           ❝   This is so lame !  This weird device can do anything you want, but that’s too much ?  Tch… !   ❞   MORDRED   can still feel the sting of embarrassment, but that’s fine. Just one more emotion to use to her advantage later. She rubs against the back of her neck, glancing around as she gauges what might be the best direction; now that the anger’s dissipated, she mostly seems... A little awkward. Playing host isn’t exactly a strong suit. 

           ❝   Fibonacci has these ‘terminals,’ it said... And that’s... … This way ?   ❞  Shit. She’s been here how long, and still isn’t positive ?   ❝   Yeah. Definitely this way !    ❞  If there’s one thing she learned in her brief stint of authority in Camelot, it’s that ‘fake it ‘till you make it’ would never not be a valid approach.  ❝   … You know, if this takes too long, I may just have to wipe the floor with ya as is.   ❞

#cometform #COMETFORM : 01. #this island is a fucking nightmare #* : QUEUE.

[clarentheir]

arsinner​:

🔥 “Could you please quiet down a little? You’re upsetting the flowers.” She had no proof of this, it was more a theory than something proven. But after spending her time as a living plant during the Maskerade Festival she definitely felt a little more attuned with flora than she once had been. 

This guest in the public garden she was tending to had been yelling about something or other, and Misella’s short fuse was quick to go off even if they looked just a little bit older than herself.

“I guess this isn’t my place to say that though, I don’t own this garden. I’m just asking as a fellow patron.”

@clarentheir​

          ❝   Does it look like I’m loiterin’, jackass ?!   ❞   TRUTH   be told, Mordred has no idea what ‘loitering’ was even supposed to mean. But he sure made it sound like laziness, and she was anything but. The Saber continues to berate the official ( cop ? security ? what use was a suit in a garden, for chrissakes ? maybe he was in uniform for the hell of it... ) long after he’d retreated, voice shrill enough to peel paint.   ❝   There’s even a saying about stopping to smell the flowers !  Why doncha try it again, big guy, see where it gets ya next time !   ❞    It didn’t occur to her just how loud she was until some twerp was telling her to shut up ( albeit politely ). And, to that twerp’s credit, the abruptness of it had her in stunned silence for a moment. A very, very brief moment. 

          ❝   … The flowers ?   ❞   Mordred ponders this. She shouldn’t, but she does. Did flowers have feelings ?  Technically they were living, but... Not alive enough to get headaches. She’s pretty positive about that.  ❝   You can just say it’s botherin’ you, you know. What, you’ve got enough nerve to talk to a stranger like that, but then you just pansy out and blame it on the flowers ?   ❞ 

#arsinner #ARSINNER : 01. #'upsetting the flowers' my ass #* : QUEUE.

[clarentheir]

          ❝   Startin’ to get cold around here... Feels a lot like Britain. Next thing you know it’ll start pourin’ every other day.   ❞

#isola mini #'just put on more clothes' no

[clarentheir]

artorialancer​:

     “amazing…” she repeated her daughter’s compliment, looking off to the side in the process. “i’m not sure i’d say that. such practices are fairly common in modern society. being able to prepare food to this point isn’t exactly something worthy of praise.’ used to being complimented for her rule, her command, her power? it made it rather strange to be praised over something that society considered so simple. 

     “the roads here can be perilous. many of them look similar. it isn’t like navigating britain’s paths on horseback.” the buildings towered so high that it wasn’t unlikely that anyone might get lost. when she’d first arrived in the city she’d spent plenty of time trying to mentally map out her surroundings and now? she could explore without a map or references for the most part.

     at the mention of strays she paused a moment. “cats? i didn’t know you liked cats that much…” artoria didn’t realize it sounded a little insensitive, but the two really didn’t know much about one another on a personal level. that was half of the reason they’d arrange this get together in the first place. she ended up freezing up at mention of the dvds however. “erm… i wouldn’t say i have a strong grasp on cinematic excellence, but you’re welcome to borrow them if you like. they were somewhat informative.”

           ❝   Thanks.   ❞   SHORT   and to the point, she’s already crouching on the ground instead— perusing each title one by one, reading the backs. She takes her time, reading each one slowly and methodically... Partially because she’s still getting the hang of the written language’s finer points, and partially because it gives her something else to focus on besides the palpably tense atmosphere. Even though Mordred would be the first to admit she tends to have a one-track mind, she can focus on occasion with a clarity that seems startling; and so, she carefully runs through each of Artoria’s conversation points that she’d initially steamrolled.

           ❝   Britain was a little confusing, too, if you ask me. I always thought it had to do with my armor... I hated that thing. Could never see everything in full like I wanted, and the summers were miserable. Still... This place is worse. Except the Ward with water on one side and the one shaped like a spiral, it’s all the same to me.   ❞  Most of these DVDs seemed to revolve around wholesome stuff. Typical family values... Was this research or pleasure for Artoria ?  Mordred could see it either way. She thinks she’ll take them all, if only because Artoria watched them. 

           ❝   As for the food... Sure, it probably seems simple, but I sure can’t cook. And it beats eating potatoes all the time... I half expected you to take a page out of Gawain’s one-chapter book. I’m kinda relieved you didn’t...   ❞  Is that wrong of her— to bring up one of the Knights of the Round like she still had the right to ?  She chose not to dwell on it too much... But either way, her voice dipped a bit lower with her next train of thought.   ❝   And cats... I like ‘em ‘cause we’re similar. I watched ‘em a lot, and always wanted one for myself... But I knew bringin’ one home would be bad.   ❞  She’s certain she doesn’t have to elaborate.   

#artorialancer #ARTORIALANCER : 02. #mom i'm home late pls forgive me and give me all these dvds

[clarentheir]

sanctummilitis​:

Not alone a rebel vying for something beyond her capability, but an obstacle; Mordred might not be fit for the throne, but neither was she — the Grail would see to her abdication, no matter what lacklustre lie offer itself. As feeble as grain in a storm, for what fool could possibly believe such a farce? As eagerly she may wish to put down the cub trying so adamantly to roar, her stance remained that of stone; no weakness from her motive for acquiring the Grail nor the ire of being faced once more with Camelot’s fall show itself any greater than had done so in that initial grumble. The irregularities of their summons bothered her; why was it that a mulitude of Sabers be upon the land, and with no Master in sight? To engage the one to whom she had failed greatest in such a state of mind, it was certainly a far cry from any reunion she may have anticipated, or perhaps yearned, on order to atone.

“Have your delusions blinded you so? To believe that such a tale would suffice? Aged we might be, one’s mind does not so sharply decline. That said, harnessing a clear one to begin with is necessary”. all too quickly was her aggitation slipping through; any number of Servants, be it one or one-hundred, was too great between herself and the Grail. “It may be the case that to meet with swords on par with one’s strength is ideal for the most honourable of combat, the wind alone informs me — if they are weak, they shall no mercy if they intend to clash. I’ve no mind for your interference this time; raise your sword and howl if you so desire, but if that may be, expect the result to differ from the past”.

          ❝   Differ, huh ?  From where I’m standing... You seem pretty eager to repeat the past.   ❞

               THIS   wasn’t what she wanted. This was a far cry from what Mordred had wanted, but it was about all she would have allowed herself to hope for. Regardless of the emotions she gradually came to understand in the Greater Grail War, Father was never privy to them. How could she expect Father to understand what they’d never understood in the first place ? This isn’t what she wanted... But to see the King standing there, defiant and steadfast as always— audacious enough to look down on her when they were equally locked to the whims of this pisshole of a city... Well, the righteous fury bubbling within her was strong enough that she could convince herself this was what she wanted. … By the end of it, at least. Father wants to paint her as a mad dog again, all gnashed teeth and rabid howls ? Then she’ll swing Clarent forward, leveled at her King once more. Her knuckles grow white within moments; it takes extra concentration to keep the metal from quavering, catching the light.

          ❝   You should just be honest, Father. I’d respect it more if you wanted to settle a score. Tch… You wanna make a fool of yourself, keep chasing after your little pipe dream ?  I woke up from mine a while ago... But I’ll letcha hold onto it a little longer if it means it’ll pain you later. You want that imaginary Grail so bad, then why doncha try and slice through me to get it ?  Heh— for old times’ sake !   ❞

#sanctummilitis #SANCTUMMILITIS : 01. #> drops everything as soon as i see this on my activity feed days later #dad please take me to mcdonald's after this

[clarentheir]

Keep reading

#YEAAAAAAAAAH #EVENT : maskerade.

[clarentheir]

hopeled​:

    “ I don’t know! How am I supposed to know how many grains of regular sand it can take? It’s probably like…….a billion?? “

        ❝   Exactly !  And one patch of quicksand is always gonna be quicker than a billion or so grains of regular sand !  ❞

#hopeled #this is literally the 'i've connected the dots' meme

[clarentheir]

hopeled​:

   “ That depends on how fast regular sand can kill you. If you’re smothered with it, then it’s faster than quicksand. “

         ❝   How many tiny grains of regular sand would it take for that to happen ?  That would make it slower than quicksand, just trying to get enough regular sand !  ❞

#hopeled #please this is not science send help #this is two braincells trying to rub together and come up with four instead of three

[clarentheir]

hopeled​:

    “ I got a question: why is it called quicksand if you go down slow? “

     ❝   Well... It kills ya faster than regular sand, doesn’t it ?   ❞

#hopeled #petition to change it to 'slightly quicker sand'

[clarentheir]

cometform​:

          “… In that?“ That looked like the little metal toy he was left with upon arrival. He took a closer look at Saber’s “phone,” even tapping the side a few times. So… it’s suppose to have a whole world inside of it? Like his shield? … So, everyone has a mini world in these tiny phone things– or do they all connect to the same mini world? … It sure would have been nice if there was a Holy Grail to just give him the answers– but for now, he’s just gonna have to take Saber’s word for it.

     More importantly, it looks like she’s dead serious about demanding a fight… What a mess. A part of him is already thrilled at the idea of a new battle to face– even more so knowing there was a way to access his full strength for a short while! And yet… all of this means having to face off against a woman once again. It’s a concern he’ll have to keep to himself; he’s already gotten a glimpse of how she’d react if he spoke about his hesitance. She’s got a ton of pride in battle to spare… A knight, huh? Right now, in his eyes, she’s leaning closer to an Amazon warrior. But for now, he’ll have to push aside those concerns.

          “You realize how absurd this is, right? I could just find someone else to ask…” A brief pause allowed his grin to come back, his hand bringing down the blunt end of his wooden spear against the ground. “Lucky for you, though– I’m just itching for a good fight to welcome me to this new world. So fine, I’ll take your bait… Show me what this Intraspace deal is all about, Saber!”

        ❝   Che... No, there’s no one else you could ask. You’re a Servant, right ?  A Servant’ll never walk away from a fight.   ❞   SHE   states it with a brief nod, as if it were simply fact — because it was. Even if he weren’t Achilles the Hero and she weren’t Mordred the Traitor, they were bound by their very nature to seek out — and overcome — the strongest. The how and why was secondary. 

       ❝   I’ve never used it before myself,   ❞  Saber explains absentmindedly, finger tapping away at her device — before frowning deeply as she stares at her screen in disgust.  ❝   Mm ?  … Guess you gotta find a terminal to use it the first time. … That just kinda ruins the adrenaline a bit, doesn’t it ?   ❞   Was she whining ?  Maybe a little. She was all worked up and raring to go, ready to hop into that digital world and shove her Noble Phantasm right up his cocky ass... ! 

      ❝   Dammit, that’s so annoying !  Hey, Rider, new deal !  I’ll show you around until we find one of these ‘terminal’ things, and then it’s — … Whadda they call it ?  … On sight — then it’s on sight !   ❞

#cometform #COMETFORM : 01.

[clarentheir]

cometform​:

          “Isn’t that another food place? Eh… I’d rather try to hold out for something right for me. Settling for less just wouldn’t sit right with me. Or maybe I’m just too picky for my own good– who knows?“

         ❝   You think I’d stoop to working at any old food place just ‘cause ?!  There’s a reason I chose Denny’s !   ❞   THE   Saber lowers her voice ( a rarity to be sure ), clearly imparting some sacred wisdom. 

         ❝   People’re always gettin’ into fights on this stupid island, and nine times out of ten, that fight’s at the Denny’s in the middle of the night. So if you’re workin’ there, you get to see firsthand who’s worth fighting in this place... And first dibs on a good fight. ... And dibs on the food the brawlers don’t eat.   ❞

#cometform #there was another greek guy that was in love with himself right ?? that turned out good right ??

[clarentheir]

cometform​:

          “Broke is such a strong word. It’s not my fault that this place doesn’t really have a lot of jobs for big heroes like me! Things were a lot easier when people were just paying me to fight a bunch of armies by myself…“

          ❝   Eh, took me a while to find somethin’ to do. Nothin’ felt right. ... You should try the secret Denny’s — that’s where I wound up. They’re always hiring for some reason...   ❞

#cometform #if you love you so much why don't you just marry you

[clarentheir]

cometform​:

          “One– You get one. I don’t have Golden Rule, ya know.“

      ❝   Fine. Guess it can’t be helped if you’re broke.   ❞   SAYS   the one who had yet to replenish funds from the first post-crisis pub crawl.

#cometform #i like puns but i do not like You