craftycritterart

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[craftycritterart]

Teeth are bullshit. What do you mean you’re decaying. Get a fucking grip. You’re a bone now act like it. You don’t see my finger bones decaying from jerking it too much now do you

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this is by far the funniest jigsaw_quotes post i genuinely cannot stop thinking about the sight of like, jigsaw opening his wallet in the checkout line at the Death Trap Lowe’s and he has like two pennies and a dime in there. and he just sighs

[craftycritterart]

sometimes when I’m having a quiet moment with Pangur or Grim, I think “oh fuck what have I done” (re: the incoming kitten) because there’s a specific kind of loving calm you have with old animals that have spent their lives with you, and I don’t want to ruin that. and then other times Pangur and Grim will bother me out of boredom and ignore all their toys, and in those moments I say “heed my words, ye heathens, and despair, for I am bringing a tiny kitten to attack you. you will look back on this present boredom with gratefulness, because chaos is coming to your lands”

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coming for you

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i too have a pressing question: why are straights like this

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at my job we have to go through a training program that teaches us the library of congress classification system, and when i was first being trained my boss started to boot it up and she gave me a really anxious and guilty look and said “listen, i’m really sorry in advance, there’s nothing i can do about this, just…. just try to get through it” and i was like lol what’s she talking about and then the program loaded and i was greeted with a deliriously funny-looking photoshopped wizard with glowing eyes pointing at some intro message like “AH YES, JUST AS THE PROPHECY FORETOLD… APPRENTICE, YOU COME AT A TIME OF MOST DIRE NEED… YOU MUST LEARN OUR WAYS” and my boss just looked at me helplessly and was like “i’m so sorry. it’s like two hours long.”

thankfully it wasn’t an elaborate fever dream and i have found screenshots

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hey sorry we put your players in a time loop. yeah they can only win by learning, and they can only learn by playing. yeah grant o’brien is carboloading next to their podiums. yeah they know that x equals 8 so y must equal 6. no they can’t use the ladder. yeah now they’re doing the wenis. sorry. 

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This machine kills AI

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what do you meaaaaaaan this is baby sturgeons youre lying to me.... you just Shrunk him

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marcille is NOT an animal crossing cozy gamer girl she is a fucking spreadsheet warrior. maybe she plays stardew valley but she runs that farm like the navy

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has anybody seen my pet piece of paper. his name is walter he is very fragile but very adventurous. i should never have left the window open in my tenth story apartment

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[craftycritterart]

in the hour or so it took me to draw this op turned reblogs off