cryptidinlaw

[cryptidinlaw]

I can’t breathe

[cryptidinlaw]

Unfriendly reminder that while you're busy mourning the loss of your childs old gender, claiming you need to mourn the death of your son/daughter, there's a group of boys/girls/enbies scrambling to take your kid clothes shopping, snatching up the chance to take those "first" experiences from you forever. Your sons first fishing trip is gonna be with his best bros, your daughters first makeover is going to be with her girl friends, your kids first camping trip out as themselves is gonna be with the besties. Good luck getting those bonding experiences back. While you're busy trying to guilt-trip your kid with your weird manufactured parental trauma, there's a whole community ready to take your place as the better family.

Your loss, someone elses gain.

[cryptidinlaw]

[cryptidinlaw]

I recently had surgery, and at the time I came home, I had both my cat and one of my grandma's cats staying with me.

- Within hours of surgery, I wake up from a nap to my cat gently sniffing at my incisions with great alarm.

- I was not allowed to shower the first day after surgery, and the cats, seeing that The Large Cat is not observing its cleaning ritual, decided I must be gravely disabled and compensated by licking all the exposed skin on my arms, face, and legs.

- I currently have to sleep with a pillow over my abdomen because my cat insists on climbing on top of me and covering my incisions with her body while I sleep (which is very sweet but not exactly comfortable without the pillow). She also lays across me facing my bedroom door, presumably on guard for attackers who may try to harm me while I'm sleeping and injured.

That's love. 🐈‍⬛🐈❤️

[cryptidinlaw]

Angel Dust + text post

[cryptidinlaw]

People, especially games, get eldritch madness wrong a lot and it’s really such a shame.

An ant doesn’t start babbling when they see a circuit board. They find it strange, to them it is a landscape of strange angles and humming monoliths. They may be scared, but that is not madness.

Madness comes when the ant, for a moment, can see as a human does.

It understands those markings are words, symbols with meaning, like a pheromone but infinitely more complex. It can travel unimaginable distances, to lands unlike anything it has seen before. It knows of mirth, embarrassment, love, concepts unimaginable before this moment, and then…

It’s an ant again.

Echoes of things it cannot comprehend swirl around its mind. It cannot make use of this knowledge, but it still remembers. How is it supposed to return to its life? The more the ant saw the harder it is for it to forget. It needs to see it again, understand again. It will do anything to show others, to show itself, nothing else in this tiny world matters.

This is madness.

[cryptidinlaw]

I must not explain the joke. Explaining the joke is the joke-killer. I will face my followers who did not get the joke. I will permit them to pass over me and through me

[cryptidinlaw]

[cryptidinlaw]

[cryptidinlaw]

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but if you’re at a low point:

If you were a fictional man right now, there would be *at least* ten people if not a large portion of the fanbase that would call you their wet beast poor little meow meow

[cryptidinlaw]

If you're fifteen or older an still sleep with a stuffed animal please reblog this.

#and i love them

[cryptidinlaw]

The Cab: “I’m an angel with a shotgun, fighting til’ the war’s won, I don’t care if heaven won’t take me back, I’ll throw away my faith, babe, just to keep you safe, don’t you know you’re everything I have?”

2012 Supernatural fans:

[cryptidinlaw]

guy sitting in front of me in class was vandalizing wikipedia and i kept reverting his edits as soon as he made them and he couldn't figure out why it was happening

[cryptidinlaw]

[cryptidinlaw]

glad to see those spreading the truth

[cryptidinlaw]

Ugh, was having a great time mocking my recently imprisoned rival when I noticed the camera positioning makes it so that I appear behind the bars, thus framing me as trapped in a metaphorical prison of the narrative, now my whole day is ruined. Fuck.

[cryptidinlaw]

Can’t believe Alex Brightman got into a blimp to kill Alex Brightman, only for Alex Brightman to kill Alex Brightman. Then Alex Brightman gets killed by a friend of Alex Brightman, and Alex Brightman goes to heaven.