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I don't know where I read it but one of the best quotes I've ever read about the nature of sci-fi was "A good sci-fi story is one that predicts not the car but the traffic jam"

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I'm gonna need to remember this prompt for when I'm having a bad day

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"average knight kills 50 people a year" factoid is actually just statistical error. Average knight kills maybe 2 people per year. Manslaughters Gawain and Murder-In-The-Third-Degree Lancelot, who live in Camelot and kill hundreds of people a week, are outliers adn should not have been counted

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Recently on Unhelpful File Labels in the Archives:

On-Going Project. Folders were empty.

Well Written Articles, 1999. There were no articles in this folder. There were a lot of budget reports though.

Stuff. You are killing me smalls.

Section 569-055 Knowingly burning or exploding. This was just papers shoved between files, I have a lot of questions and zero answers.

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A bird with a good name is the least grebe. If that grebe grebe'd any less there wouldn't be any grebe there, hence it is the least grebe possible without no grebe.

[a least grebe shown next to mallard duck] image credit: Richard Ditch -> https://richditch.wordpress.com/2013/01/22/maricopa-countys-first-least-grebe/

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society has ingrained in all of us that bugs are bad and evil and scary and they Bite You for no reason and Sting You For Fun and I would like to challenge every single person that reads this to try to step back and challenge those thoughts. CHALLENGE that knee-jerk reaction to kill every bug you see. REALIZE that killing it doesn't have to be the answer. it's fine to not want bugs in your home. but I see so many people whose FIRST choice is to kill it, even though it'd be easy to just cup it and toss it outside. why?

one of the greatest things that got me over my extremely intense arachnophobia was knowledge. learning more about the thing I was afraid of made me realize, "oh, they're just little guys trying to get by too" and I stopped killing every spider I saw.

and it's like. no, that wasp didn't sting you for fun. it stung you because it felt scared or defensive. no, the spider in your shower isn't trying to kill you. spiders need water to live too.

you don't deem a scared dog/cat evil for biting you, do you? then why are we demonizing insects and spiders for feeling scared? they are so, so small and we are so large. they don't know anything about us, they're just trying to live life. they didn't know they built their web in a bad spot. they didn't know they built their nest next to your door. please, show some kindness to these tiny creatures. I understand you can't let infestations happen or wasps build in your walls, but whenever possible, try to put bugs in a cup and take them outside. yes, even wasps. even black widows. if you want tips for safely capturing bugs, I'm always around to ask.

also, to those who say things like, "x bug eats other pest bug, so they're okay" why? why does something have to benefit you to deserve to live? shouldn't all creatures have a chance at life, even if they're ugly, even if they don't benefit you, even if they do something you don't like? what gives you the right to decide to take the life of any animal just because ahhh it looked scary? please. all I ask is you try to be kinder. it's okay to be scared, it's not okay to pointlessly kill things.

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What are some chronic illnesses that can only occur in a fantasy setting?

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my family is fucking addicted to macgyvering and it's becoming a problem. every time something in this house breaks, instead of doing the sensible thing of replacing it or calling someone qualified to fix it, we all group around the offending object with a manic look in our eyes and everyone gets a try at fixing it while being cheered on or ridiculed by the rest.

it's a beautiful bonding activity, but the "creative" fixes have turned our house into a quasihaunted escape room like contraption where everything works, but only in the wonkiest of ways. you need a huge block of iron to turn on the stove. the oven only works if a specific clock is plugged in. the bread machine has a huge wood block just stapled to it that has become foundational to its function. sometimes when you use the toaster the doorbell rings. and that's just the kitchen.

it's all fun and games until you have guests over and you have to lay out the rules of the house like it's a fucking board game. welcome to the beautiful guest room. don't pull out the couch yourself you need a screwdriver for that, and that metal rod makes the lamp work so don't move it. it also made me a terrifying roommate in college, because it makes me think i can fix anything with enough hubris and a drill. you want to call the landlord about a leaky faucet? as if. one time my dad made me install a new power socket because we ran our of extension cords

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vampire who’s married to an archaeologist voice: my love, stop trying to carbon date me

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When boarding buses, or any sort of public transportation where you have to walk past a driver to board, always smile at and greet the driver as you're boarding.

It doesn't waste anyone's time, yours or the drivers, to smile and greet the driver, as chances are you probably have to pay or scan your pass which is going to take a second or two, about the amount of time it takes to smile and greet the driver.

When we don't look at or acknowledge the driver at all, this can make the driver feel dehumanized to not be acknowledged by other human beings all day. Being a bus driver is a difficult job, they have to do customer service AND deal with traffic all day. Bus drivers also face a lot of burn out because they are often treated poorly. The least you can do is humanize them by smiling at them and greeting them.

#yeah that makes sense cmdrburton #meanwhile here getting off a bus is a chorus of thanks thanks thanks thanks #bc you have to walk past the driver to get off #though I have spoken to a driver who said nobody thanks him anymore and that was sad bc I do believe it's decreased

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even beyond the whole thing where divine pairings aren’t at all comparable to western marriage constructs “THE ANCIENT EGYPTIANS GODS DID AN INCEST WITH THEIR SIBLINGS EW” is such a fucking moot point too because what, do you think divine fucking beings have like. chromosomes or some shit? no. shut up. you know nothing. Atum masturbated the universe into existence and you’re worried about Shu and Tefnut boning. come on now.

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fig disintegrating biscotti with her mind

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Red Prowfish (Pataecus fronto), family Pataecidae, order Scorpaeniformes, found in the coastal waters of western and southern Australia

photograph by JW Turnbull

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saw an ice cream van that was ancient with ancient pics of old Disney and looney tunes characters. But fear not, the menu was fully up to date. There was a lotus biscoff ice cream there.

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