dragongirltail

[dragongirltail]

So I’m on a trip with my robotics team and there’s only two “girls” (me, an enby, and a cis girl), so we get our own beds in our own room, but the guys are rooming four to a room, but there’s only two beds in each room. Which means that two guys are sleeping on the floor every night.

I’m not joking. They were literally arguing over who’s sleeping on the floor tonight (apparently they plan on rotating).

And I asked them “why don’t you just share a bed?” And they all gave me the same answer:

“No, that’s weird! That’d be gay!”

And I just looked at them and I decided to break the bad news to them

“If lying next to another guy makes you wanna suck dick, you already wanted to suck dick.”

I’ve never seen so many Straight Guys™️ enraged by a single sentence before

[dragongirltail]

This is the funniest video ever

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Well you see minors under 25 years old should not be allowed to get gender reassignment surgery because what if they go to the clinic but instead of giving them a normal penis the nurses mess up and give them the evil penis. That's irreversible

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my beautiful girlfriend having a sick and twisted reality check

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little girl was pestering her mom while she was on the phone and the mom turned to the kid and just said "bruh" and it silenced her immediately

[dragongirltail]

thesis: calling things "biblically accurate" isnt funny anymore

antithesis: saying "none of these words are in the bible" isnt funny anymore either

synthesis: theres some level of biblical relevance that will make jokes funny but we havent found it yet

#'they beat jesus with that' is still immensely funny #what this suggests I do not know I hope the scholars can piece it together

[dragongirltail]

is wet&wild liquid eyeliner part of the male dungeongoer starter kit or something

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You wouldn’t last an hour in the asylum where they raised me

[dragongirltail]

HELP i was watching off the hook perform and the angle i was at makes it look like pearl is being repeatedly set on fire 😭