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Alicia’s dating Holster & accidentally says “your father & I” and Jack doesn’t talk to either of them for 4 months

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ppl trying to make some of these ships all cute n domestic dont seem to understand these characters are insane. they would have sex by standing on opposite sides of the room fully clothed playing mind games

#this is what holster thinks is happening

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i wonder what kind of jack/parse fanfics ransom and holster have written

#I think they would rp together

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theyre cute as a couple but the follower gap between them is a little ..... uncomfortable??

#zimbits

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the chances of a nurseydex mention on ngozi’s twitter are low but never zero

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it's been said many times before, but i'll say it again. they fucked that pie.

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hey uh I put your boyfriend in a twisted psychosexual dynamic with his bitterest frenemy and — huh? yeah, they’re meep meeping each other. tiny anvils and Zambonis falling from the sky yup. the whole shebang. the frenemy fucked your boyfriend’s mom so like that’s gonna be a hullabaloo for sure

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number one sees an opening, he lines up the shot...

inspired by

@notallthosewhowander jack: backhand forehand backhand aaand that’s a slapshot— redirected on smith’s blade— goes in glove side! *shoves peas into laughing toddler’s mouth* (x)

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holster describing his "situationship" with jack freshman year (they made out once), 2015, colorized

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You’ve got a warm heart, You’ve got a beautiful brain But it’s disintegrating, From all the medicine

daughter // medicine

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its really crazy how fast food was billed as cheap for the price of being shitty and now its just like...... well with these prices might as well get an actually decent meal at a real restaurant lol

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Trail Magic (Check Please!)

A gift for @ficcinghell! This Check Please fic was written AND typeset by @tiesthatbindery and features the frogs on the Appalachian Trail. I continue to love doing layered covers and mimicked the section of the AT that the boys hiked (Katahdin to around Allenstown).

The original typeset was for folio size, but I wanted it to feel a bit like a pocket book you would have gotten in the 70s so I shrunk it down to legal quarto. My original plan was to paint the edges in bronze but the bronze paint failed miserably, so I trimmed it off and painted with green ink instead, which further contributes to that retro novel vibe.

I used Lokta paper with a fern pattern for the endpapers as well as the underlayer in the cover.

Denois' typeset was understandably perfect already, and I am very grateful I got to use it! The immaculate retro vibes are wonderful.

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Hello, it is Tuesday and it’s been a while since I’ve done a Holster shitpost. I miss my lorge boi. 

Bonus:  Holster: Bits, can we talk? One ten to another? Bitty: I’m an eleven, but continue. 

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HAPPY PI DAY, BITTY, YOU DESERVE THE WORLD

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can you imagine being bitty's date that barfed on his shoes and you think you escaped the whole incident only to turn on the TV one day and see him tongue kissing the hottest grad from your school? i'd euthanize myself on the spot.

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The thing about OMGCP is that on first exposure shitty’s nickname takes you out completely. And then by the first reread you forget it’s even a swear