Tumgik
31K notes · View notes
Tumblr media
i literally feel like im going to be sick trying not to laugh at this at my desk like i feel faint
56K notes · View notes
Tumblr media
Watcher, sitter and observer
Tumblr media
+ FP and NSH
2K notes · View notes
to SoS:
yes. hold the pepsi dispenser up like he's a goofy little slugcat. the world needs to see it
Tumblr media
44 notes · View notes
working on iterator oc's yaaay *insert celebratory particles*
mainly doodles but i feel like doing bigger pieces with them, though they need some more work.
The blue one i'll call Quivering Skies, the red ones gonna be 3 Pearls 7 Notches
Personality-wise i only know that QS embraces life while PN is... idk i guess they're dissociating for the most part??
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
18 notes · View notes
anyway. onto better things
Tumblr media
282K notes · View notes
i have a friend whomst I will not name in case they don’t want to be asked about this but they have a Very Specific and Terrible power which is, if you take the online BDSM quiz and then just simply mention you have, they can look at you for under ten seconds and just state your top result.
I can’t tell you anything more soul-shattering, any death more instant and devastating, any moment more harrowing to witness than someone saying “yeah i took the BDSM quiz once” only for my friend to no more than glance at them and then announce “brat” and the look in the person’s eyes is that of one who just tipped too far back in their chair
118K notes · View notes
my family fucked up my life by using spoonerisms interchangeably with their true phrase counterparts since before i was born and now i can’t escape from instinctively saying shit like “im gonna shake a tower”
162K notes · View notes
For those that aren't in Australia right now, we have the funniest scandal going on.
Firstly let us introduce you to the eye of the storm: Sam Kerr. Sam is a women's soccer player who has in the last year become one of the most famous and beloved athletes in Australia. Captain of the women's national team, Sam became something of a cult figure after the last Women's Soccer World Cup became a complete unpredicted sensation in Australia, with the whole country getting behind the team.
Sam, up until now, has had probably one of the most squeaky clean images in sport. Generally in Australia it is not uncommon for our sports stars to be caught up in scandals involving drugs:
Tumblr media
violence:
Tumblr media
drinking their own urine:
Tumblr media
or if you're cricket legend Shane Warne, probably all three at once.
Tumblr media
Contrasting all this, Sam's image as the squeaky clean saviour for sport made it all the more shocking this last week, when it was announced that Kerr was to face trial after having been charged by the UK police of a "racially aggravated offence" involving a taxi driver.
This was shocking news. Nobody knew what to make of it. Sam was a model for young girls everywhere and a national treasure. "This is why we can't have nice things" screamed the nation. It seemed like all hope was lost.
That is, until, yesterday, when the UK police finally revealed the full details of the case, in which Sam Kerr, sporting legend, was arrested for vomiting in a cab, and then telling an intervening police officer that he was a “stupid white bastard”.
Now we probably don't need to point out that in Australia, vomiting in a taxi and then calling a cop a bastard is about as close to a national culture as we have.
You could not have come up with a better headline to make someone a national hero.
Needless to say, Sam in now being hailed down under as the greatest legend that ever lived, and a petition has already been started to have her picture added to the $5 note.
The tide has swung so far that not one, but TWO, state Premiers have spoken out in support of Kerr, and the Prime Minister has even gone on the record describing her as "a delight".
And so ends the racial abuse saga of our greatest sports hero of all time, and the very first reverse milkshake duck to ever exist.
Tumblr media
59K notes · View notes
Tumblr media
One thing I didn't expect from my new worldbuilding book is the author, roughly my dad's age, including his opinions on furries
73K notes · View notes
“Jesus christ eat the goddamn mac and cheese.” scowls the hero “I can hear your stomach growling through your armor, you know.”
The villain blinks “You-”
“Are feeding you, yes. If all I wanted to do was punch people and throw criminals in jail, I would’ve become a vigilante. Heroism involves kindness, dipshit.”
109K notes · View notes
Tumblr media Tumblr media
short comic about some siblings post godhome
3K notes · View notes
Tumblr media
fun little outfit recc i got for moon. honestly it kinda works
505 notes · View notes
“Dragon, I am not sure that I am a prince.”
“Of course not, you are my beloved pet.” “No, I mean… gender-wise.”
“Oh. Are you a princess?”
“No, I don’t think so.” “Alright, dear. Then, what are you?” “I think- well I’m not sure I am allowed.”
“You can be anything you want to be, my darling.”
“Well- and please don’t laugh- I think I’d like to be a dragon. … Like you.”
The dragon purred and wrapped its long neck around the smaller being and nuzzled its nose on their head. “Then a dragon you are, my love.”
“But I’m worried I’m not qualified to be a dragon. I don’t have scales or wings.”
“Dragons come in all sorts of kinds. Many are scaleless or wingless.”
“And I’m rather small and weak for a dragon…” They sighed. “I mean, I am already fairly small and weak for a human.”
The dragon studied the being who was now a smaller dragon for a long time before speaking rather gently. “I am rather small and weak for a dragon too you know… It is something I never told you, and you couldn’t know because you have none other to compare me to.” “What? But you’re so big and strong! You fly ten miles a day to hunt for us and you defend me from nosey knights who try to ‘rescue’ me!”
The dragon nodded. “Yes, but other dragons can fly for a thousand miles a day and hunt for an army, and they could fight off an army too. After fighting a single knight I become quite tired… This is why I live alone in this cave, away from other dragons. They harass me for my weakness, and try to push me to do more… they say what I am is not enough.” With this, the dragon lowered it’s head, seeming to feel ashamed. 
The smaller, human shaped dragon kissed the larger one on the snout. “Well, you are certainly enough for me. You might not be able to fight or feed an army, but your hunts keep us both full and your claws keep us both safe. And I always look forward to curling up under your wings at the end of the day. You don’t have to be alone anymore.” They frowned, their brow furrowing. “It makes me angry how you were treated.”
“It makes me angry how you were treated! That is what drew me to rescue you. I could see your society was treating you the same as mine was… Pushing you to do too much when you were tired, not appreciating you for who you are… but I appreciate you. You always know how to make me laugh, and all your little faces are so cute. I always look forward to feeling you press against my sides at the end of the day.” It nuzzled them. “You are dragon enough for me, better than any other dragon I have met. You are enough.”
The smaller dragon nodded. “We are our own sort of dragons. And that is enough.”
2K notes · View notes
Tumblr media
18K notes · View notes
IMPORTANT!!!
I’ve only seen like one person talk about this and it’s super important that this gets out there
Multiple punk symbols and sayings have been added to the FBI’s domestic terrorism guide
Things included are
The symbol for anarchy
ACAB and 1312
The three arrows pointing down in a circle
Eat the rich
Those are a few but it also mentions anything anti-fascist and anti capitalist
So if you live in the US please be careful
28K notes · View notes
Do not punish the behaviour you want to see
I mean, it seems pretty obvious when you put it like that, right?
But how many families, when an introvert sibling or child makes an effort to socialize,  snarkily say, “So, you’ve decided to join us”?
Or when someone does something they’ve had trouble doing, say, “Why can’t you do that all the time?” (Happened to me, too often.)
Or any sentence containing the word “finally”. 
If someone makes a step, a small step, in a direction you want to encourage, encourage it. Don’t complain about how it’s not enough. Don’t bring up previous stuff. Encourage it.
Because I swear to fucking god there is nothing more soul-killing, more motivation-crushing, than struggling to succeed and finding out that success and failure are both punished.
251K notes · View notes