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gabemon · 7 years

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2017 MMA Junkie Gathering Trip Report

The previous Junkie Gathering in 2015, I broke my thumb by slamming an SUV door shut on it after exiting the car. I was carrying a bag of groceries in that hand, and managed to leave the thumb in the door while using my other hand to shut it. I definitely thought that the sane thing to do would be to cancel my trip, but I just couldn’t do it. I remember thinking to myself, “gotta be a soldier!” I kept my finger in a cup of ice and hopped on a bus the following morning.

I kept my finger in a cup of ice the entire week; asking bartenders for a cup of ice water everywhere I went. People kept wondering why I wasn’t talking too much. I guess they couldn’t tell that I was dying in pain and crying on the inside. (Plus, I was the new guy and hadn’t gotten to know everybody yet.)

Looking back, I was definitely crazy for going to Vegas for seven nights with a newly-broken thumb to meet a bunch of people for the first time. Zero regrets, though. I knew the memories would be worth it, and it ended up making a pretty cool story, too.

After spending some time on the east coast (mostly Long Island, NY), I flew into L.A. to spend a couple weeks with my family before going to Vegas for The Gathering. On Monday, May 22nd, I caught a flight from L.A. into Vegas and arrived around 4:30 p.m.

I checked-in to the Oasis Gold Spike in Downtown Vegas, right by the Fremont Experience. It was my second time staying there and I had a good time while hangin’ there. Bit of a party scene.

I did my thing for a bit, then it was time to connect with the Junkies. They were at the Mandalay Bay Sportsbook, and I was on my way.

Lackey was the first to greet me when I arrived, then I went around saying hello to everyone else. Buffalo Blue was already eight shots of Jager deep into an eventual 26 shots. I loved how happy and excited he was about it. Seeing Lackey and Blue already having a blast, I was filled with giddy ‘cos I knew we were in for one helluva week.

There were only a few of us at the sportsbook on Monday night. I remember arriving there, but the rest of the night is a blur to me. I don’t remember it. Smart money says we got wasted, then I went to my room and crashed.

Tuesday morning, I arrived at the sportsbook with a bottle of Wild Turkey American Honey Whiskey. I shared it with John Hooper Raynes, as he had told me that he does not like honey whiskey. He liked this one, however, and agreed that it’s better than the rest, i.e. Jack Daniels and Jim Beam. The reason for that is Wild Turkey uses real honey, while the others use honey liqueur.

At one point, Lackey, myself, Spider Rico, rookies Ryan Dunlay, Mike Noles and Jon Huerta rolled to the parking lot to get our smoke on. Lackey said it was the biggest smoke sesh in Junkie Gathering history. I think Doncho may have been with us, as well.

Before the radio show started, we surprised Goze with Danny the producer, who Jason Lackey had arranged to fly out to the Gathering as a surprise for George and Goze. Goze was happy to finally meet Danny in person for the first time, but wasn’t too thrilled that we “got” him.

MMA Junkie Radio ended at noon, and the Flag Football game was supposed to start at 6 p.m. I assumed I would have some time to get back to my room and get changed, but never got the chance. I can’t remember what I did exactly between those hours, which probably means I had a pretty good time.

It was around 100 degrees out and we were about to go to the park for a football game and BBQ. I was wearing black jeans. There was no time to go get changed, so I tried to look for shorts in the casino shops. “At the end of the day” I decided not to spend $70 on some shorts and instead made my own by rolling up my jeans.

During the football game is when I made Michael Sanchez do his first set of 10 of 100 push-ups he owes me for losing a bet. I bet him 100 push-ups (10 at a time) that Germaine De Randamie would defeat Holly Holm, with the winner getting to request the pushups whenever he pleases.

I didn’t play in the game, but it looked like everyone had a blast. I helped Sam the Chef set up the BBQ and he killed it on the grill. We had some good food and good laughs; it was a good night all around. An excellent way to kick off the 2017 Junkie Gathering.

Tuesday night is a blur. All I can remember are the Jell-O shots. I only had one; I spat my second one back out. Tasted disgustingly like medicine to me. I don’t do Jell-O shots, especially if they’re made with low-grade booze, which this batch clearly was.

I missed the radio show Wednesday morning and got to the sportsbook during the Manchester United game. There were a lot less people there watching it than I anticipated. I hung there for a bit after the game ended, then went off to do my own thing.

The events that day were Escape Room and Beer Park. I was performing on a comedy show that night, which took place at the same time as Beer Park, so I had planned to skip the Escape Room to get some rest before the show.

The show went really well. They rebooked me for July 5th, so I plan to be back in Vegas for International Fight Week. I’ll also pick up some spots at the LA Comedy Club, where Adam Hunter will be headlining that week. Should be good times, hope some of you will be in town!

Thursday morning at the sportsbook, I got my second set of 10 (of 100) pushups from Mike Sanchez. After the show, we went to have lunch at Toque Del Sabor Peruvian Restaurant, which is where “The Time is Junkie Press Conference” was being held. The food was solid and Burt Watson came out as a surprise, which was great. The press conference went on and was hilarious. Everybody crushed.

Mike Waluk presented a video that his wife Kindra, Billy MacDonald and Jason Ford helped him put together. It featured footage of fighters, MMA personalities and even GG and Goze’s parents congratulating them on a successful 10 years with the show. I got to see Mike get some of the footage while I was in Vegas for the MMA Awards earlier this year. It took a lot of work and was an excellent gift.

Sam All Jam asked me if I would be able to do 10mins of stand-up if he got me the mic and I said yes, but then he came back and said that he was told there wouldn’t be time. We all ended up just standing around and shooting the shit for over an hour, so that left me a little puzzled, because there appeared to be plenty of time to kill.

Next was a surprise Goze had in store for us, which was a special visit to The Ultimate Fighter Gym. We hung out there for a while and got to see every part of the gym, which was a real treat for any hardcore fight fan/MMA Junkie. Definitely one of the highlights of the trip.

We all went our separate ways following the visit to the TUF Gym. I went back to my room to get some rest for the evening ahead. The majority of the gang was going to the Purple Reign show, while some were going to a Jennifer Lopez concert and a couple of us to a “foodie” event at the Palazzo.

Duane Maness told me about the foodie event, called the Las Vegas Epicurean Affair. It’s a once a year event where 80 of the best chefs in Vegas serve up dishes.

I really wish this event was part of the Gathering, because it was definitely one of the highlights of my trip. Wish you guys could have enjoyed it with me. The food was amazing, and there was so much of it at every corner. The booze, too! All kinds of great, original cocktails everywhere. Including craft, draft beers, wine, gin, whiskey and pretty much anything your heart desired. I had a really great time and wish there were a group of Junkies there to enjoy it with me. I can’t imagine how much more fun it would have been.

The plan was to meet the rest of the Junkies for karaoke at Ellis Island later that night, but I had to check out of my room early the following morning, so I decided it was best to skip the karaoke and instead pack up and get a good night’s sleep.

Friday morning, I got ready to check out of my hotel early so I can get to the sportsbook ahead of time for the radio show. The plan was to present a framed Rick Budo t-shirt to Gorgeous George and Goze, for them to hang in their studio. (Copperheart, Billy MacDonald and Carla Duran collectively had the idea for it.) I did not want to miss this for the world. I had to make sure I was there for it.

The plan was to check out of my hotel and go check into my AirBnB, but I did not have time to do that. I checked out of my room and went straight to the studio, carrying my suitcase with me. When I got to the studio, Billy informed me that the plan had been canceled/changed because he was told by someone (Danny, if I recall correctly) that there wouldn’t be time for it. The new plan was to present it at lunch at Texas de Brazil.

By now I had realized that I left my suit hanging in the closet of the hotel room I just checked out of. I decided to go check into my AirBnB, go back to the hotel to grab my suit, take the suit back to my AirBnB, then head to Texas de Brazil to meet everyone for lunch and the presentation of the framed Budo shirt. But before I left the studio, I asked Billy to confirm that they were 100% for sure not going to be presenting it at the studio. He confirmed, and I left.

When I got to Texas de Brazil, first thing I did is find Billy to make sure they had not presented it. He told me that they in fact did end up up presenting it at the studio.

That hurt, because I really wanted to be there for it. I’m one of the few Junkies lucky enough to meet Budo. I had some really good times with him and he ended up being my best friend on the east coast. It meant a lot to me to be there during the presentation of the gift, and I was really bummed for missing it.

We had a great meal. I sat between Gus from Chicago and Jersey Mike, the Rookie of the Year. Afterwards, I caught a ride back to my hotel to get some rest before the wild night ahead.

The Royal Rumble/10th Anniversary party was scheduled for 10 p.m. and I arrived at the sportsbook at around 9:45. George and Goze’s dad arrived after me; we both thought we were going to be late, but were surprised to find a gang of Junkies hangin’ outside the studio.

I was freshly shaved, suited up and was not wearing a hat, so I caught some Junkies off guard. “Gabe, is that you?!” Carla yelled out. Shaving my beard (along with suiting up) was my weird way of paying respects to GG, Goze and the show for the 10th anniversary.

After shooting the shit for a bit, we made our way to the 1923 Bourbon Bar, where the party was taking place. Everybody was there, except Sam the Chef, who got fully dressed for the party but decided to take a nap before leaving and ended up missing the whole thing.

Drink in hand, I made my way around the party, talking to old friends and getting to know new ones. Pretty soon, the “Royal Rumble” started and MMA personalities started joining the action, one after another. Duane Maness was sharing his box of cigars in the cigar room, with Junkies like Dante Morgan and Lerone “L-Train” Gainey taking part. (“L-Train” is the nickname I gave Lerone during this year’s Gathering. He didn’t like it at first, but he warmed up to it.)

I had a good chat with comedian Richard Hunter, who invited me to be a guest on his Phone Booth Fighting podcast when he and Frank Mir come to Los Angeles for UFC 214 in July. I’m looking forward to that.

At one point, I left the Bourbon Bar with rookie Junkies Geoffrey and Kyle. Kyle was in search of miniature alcohol bottles, and thinking it was a good idea to get some, Geoffrey and I tagged along. Each casino shop we stopped at had their prices higher than we’d hoped, so after wasting half an hour, we called the mission a fail, tucked our tails and headed back to the party.

The drinks kept pouring and the fun kept going. Buffalo Blue started dancing and grinding with a random girl at the party. Her friend was sitting there, so I took her by the hand and started dancing with her. After a bit, she started grinding on my junk. I was completely flaccid (thanks, whiskey!) and she wasn’t changing that, so she got upset and went to sit back down.

Rookie Ryan from Sacramento asked me if I would smoke him out. Like a gentleman, I said of course. We left the party, went to the parking lot, had ourselves a smoke and headed right back. When we got back to the Bourbon Bar, we could not find the entrance. We were puzzled for a moment, but then I grabbed the wall and pulled a door right open. It was bizarre. Maybe you had to be there.

The party came to a close and the lot headed our separate ways. I went straight back to my room and crashed.

After striking out with ladies at the Bourbon Bar, I woke up Saturday morning and decided to get together with a Tinder match. She turned out to be a stripper who works at the Crazy Horse Gentlemen’s Club, so needless to say, I had quite a fun start to my Saturday; my last day in town.

I headed down to the Mandalay Bay sportsbook in the afternoon and met up with the crew before going up to Slice of Vegas for Trivia Night, which was the final 2017 MMA Junkie Gathering event I would personally be attending. (The official final event would be a Gabriel Iglesias/“Fluffy” comedy show that night, which I opted not to attend for several reasons, mainly because I needed to be packed, ready and rested for my early 7 a.m. flight.)

The Trivia was fun; my team consisted of Sam All Jam, DJ Zoo, BillyMac, L-Train, Spider Rico and four newbies whose names I don’t recall, mainly because this was the only event they attended all week. A couple of them left pretty early on, taking our team from nine people down to seven. Even with a disadvantage, we ended up in third place. I didn’t feel bad about losing, though, because I don’t think the winners received a prize. As far as I was concerned, we won!

Sam All Jam reminded me that Sanchez still owes me 80 push-ups, so I called Mike to the center of the room, where he proceeded to give me my 10, as a crowd watched on and counted. He gave me 30 (of 100) this Gathering and owes me 70 more going into the next...

When the event wrapped up, I headed back to my AirBnB, got some sleep and then started packing. Once I was packed, I went to meet up with the Junkies at Centre Bar (or is it Center Bar?) in the Luxor, which was our late night headquarters. The majority of them had just gotten back from the Fluffy comedy show.

We had some drinks, and enjoyed each others company and conversation. One by one, those who were catching early flights said their goodbye’s and headed to their rooms. Eventually, it was my turn. I said goodbye to the few who were still left, who themselves were getting ready to leave. I went back to my AirBnB to grab my luggage, and from there, straight to the airport.

Another fun, instant-classic Junkie Gathering in the books. We can’t thank the Garcia brothers enough for what they have created. I surely look forward to seeing you all at the next one... And if you’re ever in L.A. or N.Y., don’t be afraid to hit up your Cousin Gabe!

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gabemon · 11 years

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Schools Lose Neighbors to Comedy

Jamar Neighbors has the ability to take a topic like child molestation or rape and make an audience full of people from different backgrounds laugh about it. Often nervous before going on stage, you never see it in his performances. When Jamar takes the stage, it is his stage and everyone becomes immediately aware of it. He possesses great stage presence and a distinctive voice that draws audiences in with his opening joke.

“Man, I’m hungry; sometimes I go on ‘Catch a Predator’ just for the milk and cookies,” Jamar says on stage.

Graduating from South Central’s Dorsey High School in 2004, Jamar opted to attend Pasadena City College, where along with theater, he was studying to become a teacher. He graduated from PCC and continued his studies at Cal State Dominguez Hills.

On top of trying to get on stage every night and keeping up with his classes, Jamar took a position as a substitute teacher at a local high school. Jamar eventually started to teach improv comedy to student’s after school.

“That was the only reason the after school program was getting a lot of kids,” Jamar says.

Jamar Neighbors was born in South Central Los Angeles at Martin Luther King Hospital and was raised by his aunt. As a child, Jamar attended Wadsworth Elementary School in South Central but was kicked out for kicking his teacher in the shin and giving her a bruise. That might have been karma which later came back to bite him.

Jamar loved working with students but the ones who constantly misbehaved killed his passion for what he was doing. The job made him realize teaching was not for him. He felt if he continued working as a teacher, he would turn into a terrible person. Jamar tried but he just couldn’t handle all the mischievous kids. Eventually, he had enough of them and quit right in the middle of class.

“When I quit, I told the kids that were being bad who I couldn’t control, ‘Man, fuck y’all!’ and I just walked out, and they were like, ‘Where are you going, Mr. Neighbors?’ and I was like, ‘Man, shut the fuck up!,’ Jamar says, laughing.

A realization had been made; Jamar knew he was not on the right path. Having just quit his job and being only 15 credits short of graduating from Cal State Dominguez Hills, he dropped out and began focusing on comedy full-time.

Jamar got his first taste of comedy when he was 16 years old. He skipped school to go audition for a BET comedy show called “Coming to the Stage.”

“That was my very first time ever on stage. After I got off, I felt stupid but people walked up to me and said, ‘Dude, you gotta keep going!’ and ‘Man, you’ve got some really good stuff there!’ and I was like, ‘Really?’ but I didn’t get in, so it couldn’t have been that good. When my aunt heard I did it, she was like, ‘Don’t you ever skip school again!,’” Jamar says.

Two years later; 18 going on 19 and a student at Pasadena City College, Jamar again began entertaining the idea of doing comedy. For a while, he would look up open mic’s and just romance the idea of doing them. One day, Jamar decided to finally go through with it; he left class early and went to the open mic at The Laugh Factory.

“It went well. After that set, I was like, this is what I’m going to do every day after school. Well, this is what I’m going do with my life,” Jamar says.

Jamar Neighbors lives in Compton with his grandmother and takes the bus to Hollywood every day to do his comedy spots. He moved in with his grandmother when he was 19 so he could have the freedom to pursue comedy; a freedom his aunt would not give him.

“I was telling her forever, I was like, ‘I’m gonna do comedy and make $20 a night!’ and she was like, ‘No, you’re not! You’re going to go to JobCorp!,’ Jamar says.

Jamar is currently shopping a couple of television shows around town; a sitcom and a game show. He has also been taking meetings with agents, with hopes to start auditioning for television commercials.

“I need to get my black ass on the TV and out of my grandma’s house!,” Jamar says, with a laugh.

Things have been going rather well for Jamar Neighbors; he has starred in an award-winning independent film, “Underbelly Blues,” he has won The Laugh Factory’s “Fresh Faces” contest three times, and he has hosted arguably the biggest comedy show in town, Comedy Juice at the Hollywood Improv.

Jamar currently hosts Comedy Rap Battle, a monthly Hip Hop Comedy Show at The Hollywood Improv (sometimes The Comedy Store) that is a big hit; the show features stand-up comedy and freestyle rap battles in tournament format and is something of which he’s incredibly proud.

Aside from working in television, Jamar would like to do some voice-over work. One of his personal and career goals is to be the first person to use the “N” word in an animated film. Jamar would also like to continue to mature as a stand-up comedian by getting gigs on the road. He hasn’t performed in many cities and wishes to tour across the Midwest.

“I need a herpes story, everybody has a cool-ass herpes story,” Jamar says.

By Gabriel Killian

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