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the most annoying people are the ones who just reply "no 💖" to recovery/self-improvement posts

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dude your pussy just skittered away. like a insect

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I Should Be Able to Mute America

wake up cunts new nobel prize for journalism just dropped

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I forgot to post this Crow Time to tumblr! Here it is!

I love Jellybean Juice so much...

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When reading fanfic keep in mind that for professional literature: 

Short story: under 7,500

Novelette: between 7,500 and 17,500

Novella: between 17,500 and 40,000

Novel: over 40,000

Fics over 40k are literally a novel written and shared for free.  If you have written a 40k+ fic, you have literally written a novel.

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My neighbors cat risking it all for some scritches

(Source)

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shoutout to my brother for setting me up for this

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Ever seen a Golden Tiger sneeze?

(Source)

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this too shall pass

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they are friends they are friends they are friends

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hmmm why does my uterus hurt and why do i feel kinda off. weird. surely these are not the warning symptoms of a predictable biological process that occurs on a regular schedule. anyway. im going to wear white pants today.

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Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

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You know we only ever really "learn" how to bathe in our youth as it is taught to us by our parents and from then on most people kinda just bathe the same way right. And like barring actively deciding to do it the only way most people change their bathing habits is if they bathe with a loved one and get convinced to do somethi g different in the bath bc its cleaner/faster/whatever bc of them. Ok heres the thesis statement. The lack of communal bathing in society is holding us back from discovering The Ultimate Bathing