All right.
So.
We’re here. No, it’s not quite the end, and yes, I’ll have another fairly long paragraph of thank yous and lists of inspiration probably when I finally finish this long as fuck five year journey but. I think it’s pretty obvious the MAJOR plot point of this comic has been revealed. And yes, there is more to explain that we will get to in the following pages, but I wanted to take a moment and talk about something very important and personal to me. And…I hope most of you will take the time to listen. Because this singular moment was inspired by one very important thing.
This…is my daughter. She’s about eight hours old in the first picture. Three days in the second. When I first got to hold her myself.
She was born around 10 pm on Dec 2nd 2010 via emergency C-section after she had stopped moving. She was 5 weeks premature. After showing no signs of improvement she was lifelighted to a Childrens hospital more than two hours away from where I was stuck in my own hospital bed.
A major exploratory bowel surgery showed 1/3 of her lower intestine had twisted off and died.
She was given a 10% chance to live.
While pregnant we had discovered she had split chromosomes for - whatever reason. Something about the way my husband and mines genes mixed didn’t like each other I guess. We were told she was lucky her spine worked. She didn’t have downs syndrome even though she was high risk. By all accounts it was a miracle she lived as well as she did at all. And because of that I knew I wouldn’t be able to have any other children. Because I couldn’t afford the risk myself.
I think about that 10% chance alot. It’s like a needle in my brain that never goes away. And to me it’s proof that miracles can exist. I think about the six months I moved down to an assisted living house next door to the hospital so I could stay with my daughter. I think about all the other parents I met and the stories I heard in the NICU meeting rooms. These are not experiences I would ever want to lose. And I feel like….alot of what I want to put out is personal. Art can be personal or impersonal, but when you’re writing a story, or doing putting something out that you put THIS much time into. Parts of yourself, whether you realize it or not, are going to sink in.
I’m a family girl. Most people who know me probably saw this plot point coming. It’s not hard to recognize, given my background experience. MommaCQ is about a solid mother figure just raising her three boys the best she can. I grew up with three brothers and a single mom and watching this dynamic from a lense of my own mind was….shockingly easy. I think that’s how this comic came to be the way it was. I still value one of the first asks I ever got, how the whole idea actually came to be. Liz has changed their Tumblr name by now and they still drop into the Discord to spam their favorite character Schezo into our Media share once in a blue moon. It’s appreciated.
There’s alot more I can say. About personal experiences and how they come together to make something new and something that - maybe even a silly little comic with a fairly basic idea can become an important creation to someone. How it can turn into a five plus year project that was only really started for fun. For practice. To see if it could be done. Despite the lack of finesse in style, despite being woefully underskilled in all the technical sides of art, despite that it only came to be just - because one person wanted to make it happen. And whoever connected with it and enjoyed it was just a happy bonus.
The well. Of gratitude. I feel towards everyone who has read and shared and supported this comic so far cannot even be described. I am not a personable person. I am a harsh, rough individual who is extremely difficult to get close to. I’m not what I would call soft or nice or - even agreeable most times.
But I want to thank you. All of you. For giving me a second little miracle in my life. And I don’t think it would have happened if not for the little miracle sitting at home, who is clothed, can eat well, and has everything she could ever need because you guys have helped me grow THAT much.
Thank you.
(more like a monologue with hidden dialog aspects since reaper doesn't talk)
{Geno-Reaper}
..
From the very beginning I knew what was coming for me..
It was... Obvious but I was too scared of it to accept it..
... Once.. I heard of the Latin phrase "memento mori"..
... Did you know that it means 'remember you must die'..?
..Pff.... Well.. Of course you would..
... At first it felt really personal regarding my... Situation..
... Looking a bit more into it I realised it Wasn't a threat..
... It was a friendly reminder that I should live my life before its too late..
After that I felt... Lighter, somehow relieved and motivated..
I told myself I wouldn't let this hold me down.. I wasn't sure if my siblings knew that I would leave but I wanted to show them that I was still strong enough to cope with this.. I wanted to spend time with them.. All the time I had left at least..
I often thought of what comes after people leave.. But I always imagined there was something beautiful up there..
... My point is..
... I'm not scared anymore..
.....and now I am standing here, talking with you as if we were old friends..
.... Mr death...?
.... Is it alright if I..write a letter before I go...?
I was watching the movie 1917 with a friend who is also a big fan of @little-noko and while we where watching the movie she jokingly said "imagine Papercrane, but a soldier version of him. That would be so cool" sooooo that's how this accident occured.
Papercrane by: @little-noko
Not sure if this counts as fanart but alrighty
(Clothes Reference sheet was used because I just can't draw his glorious clothes TWT)
Not finished yet but here's the 70% of the meme I posted on amino. For some reason there was a problem with the specific video so yeah
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