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10am

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Is this the most relatable satire you've ever seen or what.

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waiting for my knight in shining armor (ibuprofen) to rescue me from the horrors (head hurty)

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taught my dog the word 'yucky' in association to grossness so if he's chewing on something weird I run up to him and yell "YUCKY" and he gives me this look

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I’m loving Lucy getting blood transfusions from each of her three suitors from a narrative construction perspective but I’m obsessed with Quincey going ‘wow the last time I saw blood loss this bad was when my horse got eaten by a vampire’ and absolutely no one follows up on that.

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reading vague posts about some unhinged discourse occurring far from my realm of exposure is like the platonic opposite of "I saw Goody Proctor at the Devil's Sacrament" like damn clearly i was not at the sacrament what the fuck

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NO girl dont ruin your early 20s by staying home every saturday and lamenting the death of your childhood while also being afraid to even act like a 20 something year old bc you still feel so young yet so old and lost all at once haha you’re so sexy!

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Marks and Rec: Misc #2378

("Except that the internet is real, of course.") (Dialogue from tumblr.)

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Completely heterosexual things: A servant knowingly drank from a poisoned goblet to save a prince and later while in a painful dying state mutters said prince’s name while the prince is off disobeying his father on a suicide mission to try find a cure for said servant

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looked up my symptoms on webmd and it turns out i have an ancient ancestral curse that has been passed down my bloodline for generations

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tumblr is trending on twitter EVERYONE HIDE

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I think now that queens dead they should have her stuffed and put on display in Cairo for the next 150 years.

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