herbirdglitter

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nothing pissed me off as a child more than when mr fucking watzisname found out what his name was and then fucking forgot what it was

#nooooooo it was funny

[herbirdglitter]

Oh absolutely. I heard she was incredibly conservative and the way she writes non British people, even just American and French people insane.

That said, no one accidentally writes queer relationships better than she does.

I don't know what paddington is doing on that list, but it made me think of the time someone drew a picture of the queen with paddington after she died, and we had scores of people losing their minds at the idea that paddington bear wasn't the same kind of communist as them

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even a broken clock (screenrant) is right twice a day

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I don't know what paddington is doing on that list, but it made me think of the time someone drew a picture of the queen with paddington after she died, and we had scores of people losing their minds at the idea that paddington bear wasn't the same kind of communist as them

#what about the Enid Blyton characters?? #i know they’re not animals but I must know your thoughts on moonface and silky

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you are strong. you can do it. resist the pippinification of merry

[herbirdglitter]

Would anyone care for some unsolicited fanfic recs in this trying time?

Star Wars (because I have no other life):

(Re)convene by Nightfall_1409:

10 years after sacrificing himself for the Rebellion, Ezra Bridger is offered the chance to turn back the clock and alter the course of history forever- the Force sending back with him a ragtag band of heroes, all whom have proven themselves worthy of the chance, all of whom have the drive to prevent the events that turned their lives into living nightmares, all of whom have the chance to save their loved ones from their fates.

Now 35 years in the past, returned to the era of the Republic 6 years before the rise of the Empire, 3 years before the start of the Clone Wars, he has to unite his scattered allies- Ahsoka Tano, Din Djarin, Boba and Omega Fett- and put together the puzzle of what caused the galaxy to fall, or they’ll all be doomed to watch it happen again.

Personal Thoughts:

I really like this one. Time travel is my favorite trope. It’s well written, it draws you in, and the author has done an excellent job of mashing up Legends and Canon in fun and unique ways.

It has everything: Force Sensitive Omega, Tired Space Dad Din Djarin accidentally becoming a main character, Ezra and Anakin as chaotic besties, no Jedi bashing, and much more that would be spoilers.

The author tries to update twice a month. It’s really good. Also this is the only one I’m including the summary for because I’m lazy.

Time-Traveling Artoo by SpiderMansUnfriendlyNeighbor

Crack fic go brrrr. Seriously though, it’s just Artoo fucking with Sidious and then kidnapping children to matchmake. I was laughing the whole way through.

A Means of Survival by LessAttitudeMoreAltitude

In which Ursa finds a half dead Jedi Padawan named Caleb and the Mandalorian Adoption instinct activates. Listen, Sabine has decided the Jetti’ad is her favorite person, they can’t just not adopt him

The Time Heals ‘verse by jessicas_pi

Force Sensitive Sabine travels back in time to the Clone Wars, accidentally bonds with a Force Entity that I’m 99% sure is the Brother, becomes Obi-Wan’s Padawan, and keeps accidentally-on-purpose bringing people back to the past.

Also Quinlan Vos is there.

It’s Sabezra if that’s a turn off for anyone.

You Either Die A Hero… by RennyBanette

The 501st gets trapped in a time loop on Umbara. Delightful crack full of Krell murder and fire.

The Desert Storm by Blue_Sunshine

This is the Star Wars time travel fic. It’s so good. 4 years after the fall of the Republic Obi-Wan gets caught in a sandstorm, and when it passes he’s back in time when Anakin’s just a three year old clinging to his mom’s skirt.

Naturally, Obi-Wan frees the Skywalkers, changes his name to Ben Naasade, takes his younger self as a Padawan, and gives Mace Windu so many headaches.

Featuring: Jedi Shmi Skywalker, Pong Krell getting his shit wrecked, Legends stuff, Jedi Shmi Skywalker, Mandalorians being awesome, Alderaan being awesome, Jedi Shmi Skywalker, Obitine, the Sith being evil and creepy, and most importantly, Jedi Knight Shmi Skywalker

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Wolffe: We painted this awesome art on every single one of our gunships! Our General is cool so he totally deserved it!!

Monnk: Ha, you think you're only one? How pathetic, see what we made too!

Wolffe: Vod, why your General is missile

Monnk: Because he's powerful! And he has more powerful smiles

Wolffe: Bro your throwing your General in battle for firearm

Kit: I love it.

Plo: In what meaning

Kit: They noticed my smile is gorgeous

Plo: Ah, yes. They do noticed that your smile is the powerful weapon that scares the enemy.

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the republic: don't worry we've sent our best backup team

*a 19 year-old with anger issues and reckless behaviour with a 14 year-old more impulsive than the older one*

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Happy International Asexuality Day from your friendly neighborhood bounty hunter.

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Just a reminder that Echo, after being held as a POW for like a year, frozen in a cyro chamber, having just been disconnected from the mainframe by having a cable yanked out of his fucking spinal cord goes:

Echo: *raspy might be dying voice* Rex

Rex: What is it!??? *<- terrified that he is absolutely dying*

Echo: I’ve got a big head ache 😙

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How did Obi-Wan not notice the thing with R2D2?? And what if he did?

Obi-Wan: We need to talk about your issues with attachment. Anakin: ::panicking, thinking Obi-Wan's found out about his marriage:: You had a relationship with Satine Kryze! Obi-Wan: … And Ki-Adi-Mundi is married. Jedi can have relationships, Anakin. We've talked about this. Anakin: … I think I would have remembered that.

[Many many past conversations: Obi-Wan: ::lecturing:: Attachment… the code… meditation. Anakin: ::busy tinkering:: Yes, yes, master. Whatever you say, master. Obi-Wan: This is fine. This absolutely will not come back to bite me in the ass later.]

Obi-Wan: Regardless, we need to talk about your attachment issues. Anakin: What issues? You just *said* marriage is okay. Obi-Wan: ::derailed:: What's that about marriage? Anakin: This isn't about me and Padme being married? Obi-Wan: … Obi-Wan: No. Anakin: This is about what I did when my mom died then, isn't it? Obi-Wan: … Anakin: ::getting defensive:: They deserved it! Tuskens are animals. Obi-Wan: ::rubbing his nose:: Anakin. Stop guessing. You're literally making this worse with every word out of your mouth. There happens to be a Tusken Jedi. You've *met* him. Anakin:: ::sheepish:: Oh. So, um, what's this about then? ::finally listening for the first time in the past three years:: Obi-Wan: I came here to talk to you about the salvage operation you ran to rescue R2D2. Anakin: ::puzzled:: Master? You ordered me to go on that mission. Obi-Wan: ::pinching his nose:: Anakin, you do realize that the mission would have been completely unnecessary had you just wiped the droid as per procedure? Anakin: But R2's my buddy. I wouldn't do that to him. Obi-Wan: You got all but two of the men who went with you killed in an attempt to rescue a droid! Anakin: So? I would have done the same for Padme. Or Ahsoka, Obi-Wan: … Obi-Wan: You see no issue in trading sentient lives for an inanimate object. That, Anakin is the very definition of attachment and why you either see a mind healer or go to Jedi jail. Anakin: What? You can't make me see a mind healer! Obi-Wan: You're right. Jedi Jail it is. Anakin: Noooo! I'm gonna tell my good friend the Chancellor on you! Obi-Wan: ::fed-up with everything and feeling both sassy and sarcastic:: Oh, and what's he going to do, order the clones to turn on us and massacre all the Jedi right down to the initiates in the creche? The Force: ::shouting:: YES!!! Obi-Wan:: ::facepalm:: That absolutely came back and bit me in the ass.

Later: Cody: You have a Jedi jail? Obi-Wan: No. Cody: Sir? Obi-Wan: Seemed like a safe bet. ::bitter: He obviously ignored everything else I tried to teach him. Cody: Jedi can marry? Obi-Wan: Yes. Cody: Jedi. As in you. Obi-Wan: As in... Cody: ::suddenly two inches closer:: Obi-Wan: ::squeaking:: Me? Cody: ::smoulders:: Obi-Wan: After the war. Chain of command. Would be inappropriate. Because reasons. Cody: I see.

Two days later: Fox: ::eyeing the assortment of munitions Cody's just laid on his desk, including, but not limited to, slug throwers, thermal detonators, a handful of droid poppers and a rotary cannon:: So you say that the chancellor's a direct threat to the military command of the GAR and that I get to kill him if I agree to mute my external audio pickup and follow your orders? Cody: Yes. Is there a problem? ::looms menacingly:: Fox: ::jumps up:: No takesies backsies! Thorn! Thire! It's Lifeday and Cody's just got us all a present!

~~~

Palps gets wrekt. The Corries have the Best. Day. Ever.

Cody and Obi-Wan swear the riduurok. No one is surprised.

The mind healers ending *building* a Jedi jail just so they don't have to listen to Anakin whine any longer. (R2D2 has the option of joining Anakin. Which, no. C3PO is welcome to that. R2D2 is having none of that shit. Time to head back to his original family -- the handmaidens of Naboo. Who will let him have a little murder. As a treat.)

[herbirdglitter]

Shitpost inspired by this Fallout 4 video.

What have i made

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everyone loves Predynastic Egyptian Terracotta Bowl with Human Feet. shout-out to a real one

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sometimes i feel like people forget autism is a disability. and that’s not a bad thing! i’m all for disability acceptance, im proud of my disabilities. but i feel like we forget autism can hurt.

it hurts that i have to put more time and energy into socializing than others.

it hurts when i need to move so bad, usually cause im overwhelmed by either my surroundings or emotions, that i thrash and hurt myself.

it hurts that i cant be in places that are too loud or too bright, which on bad days can be as simple as a small, quiet noise or dim lights.

it hurts that i struggle to tell when im hungry, thirsty, tired, etc. so i can’t properly take care of myself. it doesn’t help my insomnia and i get very nauseas and get UTIs.

i 100% believe in autism acceptance. i don’t want a cure. but i also want us the acknowledge that it can hurt. it doesn’t mean my entire life will hurt, but some parts will. and i want a community where we can see both sides, see the hurt, and celebrate it anyway.

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Autistic Callum

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while you were studying girls i was kissing the blade