i-love--you

[i-love--you]

you're not a monster. you're you. you're flawed, yes, but you're also incredibly alive. just human. real. capable of great things, capable of change and growth, too. don't define yourself by the inner critic lashing out at you. you're not your worst moments.

[i-love--you]

D. Alan Holmes, Enlightenment // Signet Amenti // @cryptonature // Alan Wilsom Watts // Evan M. Cohen, "Oceans" // Nikita Gill // @pauladoodles // Julian Gough, "Minecraft End Poem" // Sleeping At Last—Saturn

[i-love--you]

one thing i need to start living by is “become the thing that you want” if i want friends who throw themed parties maybe i should start throwing those parties. if i want someone who writes me love letters maybe i should start writing letters for the people i love. if i want to hang out at museums and pretty cafes maybe i should invite my friends to these places. and maybe even then i won’t find the kind of people i want to be around. but then i would have become the exact person i want to be around. and maybe that’s good enough.

[i-love--you]

I feel like a big part of enjoying life is being able to get excited over the truly small things, like having a fruit you like, wearing your fave socks, the smell of rain or the way light comes through your window.

When my anxiety got very severe last year, the thing that made life worth it was those tiny little things, which became tremendously important when I wasn’t well enough to really do anything or go anywhere for a year. A brown egg, some cute stickers, a wildflower my neighbour brought me on the way home from a party, seeing the weather change every day, watching the birds from my window… It’s happiness in miniature, and deserves some attention.

[i-love--you]

To those who were told by their friends, cousins and everyone who saw the “good” side of your parents and/or guardians how amazing they were when the reality behind closed doors was drastically different, you are so valid. You weren’t making it up. You deserved better.

[i-love--you]

[i-love--you]

Just a note that it’s still crossing boundaries if you’re doing it as a “joke”.

By this, I mean things like messing up someone’s organization because you think their distress isn’t serious and it’s funny to get a rise out of them. Or things like using a nickname someone has asked you not to use because you think it’s funny.

You’re not funny. It’s actually a really shitty thing to do. It’s not up to you to decide how valid or real someone’s distress is. If they tell you to stop, then stop.

[i-love--you]

[i-love--you]

The way you change your immediate reactions to things is that you catch yourself having an uncharitable/bigoted/overly judgmental thought and you catch it and replace it and then you do that a hundred times a day for your whole life and eventually one day like five years later you realize that you think differently now and you’ll always be working on something but that’s how life goes and that’s fine.

[i-love--you]

Rest is a requirement.

Trauma takes a heavy toll on the body's energy reserves. To constantly be in a state of fight, flight, fawn, freeze, to be stressed out so often and so hard, it's exhausting.

And when you're that tired, even the most minor of tasks feel like scaling a mountain.

You aren't lazy, you're struggling. You're fighting against the toll your trauma takes.

You need to let yourself rest. Rest, and don't blame yourself for needing it.

[i-love--you]

"you do not owe friends instant responses to every social message, and anxiety over not receiving the same is something for the anxious person to work on, not your responsibility to totally change for"

AND

"you have to put some effort into friendships, which can include open communication with your friends about how to make both of you comfortable re: messaging. expecting other people to do ALL of the work ALL of the time, in terms of getting in touch and carrying on the conversation, may make them feel ignored and/or and leave"

are ideas that can and should coexist

[i-love--you]

Somebody might need to hear this: hey. That was a really scary thing you had to go through. What an awful feeling to be carrying around. So deep inside where no one can hurt you like that ever again. If no one else has ever told you this before then I'm glad you're here. I'm glad you made it. And I'm so fucking sorry you had to see it to begin with. You absolutely did not need to see that. Not ever.

[i-love--you]

ANTI-CAPITALIST AFFIRMATIONS

i am allowed to spend my time creating things, even if they are not beautiful.

there is no such thing as a "real job." all forms of work are real and valid.

there is nothing that i need to accomplish to be worthy. i am already worthy.

doing nothing is good for my soul.

i am not defined by what i produce.

my worth cannot be measured by my paycheck, my job title, or a list of professional or academic achievements.

i do not need to monetize my hobbies, it is enough to spend time doing something i love.

i will not let society decide what success looks like. i can define what successful life looks like for me.

[i-love--you]

♡ I am allowed to regress.

♡ My regression is not gross or weird.

♡ I am not a burden.

♡ My regression is a healthy and safe space for me.

♡ If it gives me peace and joy, that's all that matters.

♡ I am taking care of myself when I regress.

♡ I am giving myself the love and support that I need.

♡ being sensitive and soft-hearted is not wrong.

♡ I am accepting myself by accepting my regression.

♡ I am protecting myself by choosing who I tell about my regression.

♡ I am allowed to use & like the things that help me regress.

♡ I deserve to regress.

♡ My regression is valid no matter what it looks like.

♡ Its okay if I can't regress as often or as little as I'd like to.

♡ It is okay to want to be taken care of.

♡ Its okay to not want to be taken care of.

♡ Its okay to need/want extra attention and care.

♡ My regression doesn't always have to be positive.

♡ My regression doesn't have to look a certain way.

[i-love--you]

[i-love--you]

Humans are adorable.

Supporting evidence:

1. Humans say ‘ow’, even if they haven’t actually been hurt. It’s just a thing they say when they think they might have been hurt, but aren’t sure yet.

2. Humans collect shiny things and decorate their bodies and nests with them. The shinier the better, although each individual has a unique taste for style and colouring

3. Humans are not an aquatic or even amphibious species, but they flock to bodies of water simply to play in it. They can’t even hold their breath all that long; they just love to splash!

4. When night falls and the sky goes dark, humans become drowsy and begin to cocoon themselves in soft, fluffy bedding.

5. Some humans spend time in each other’s nests! Just for fun! It’s not their nest; they’re just visiting each other.

6. Some humans use pigments and dyes to make their bodies flashy and colourful! They even attach shiny dangly bits to their cartalidgous membranes!

7. Humans are very clever, and sometimes adopt creatures from other species into their family units. They don’t seem to notice the obvious differences, and often raise them alongside their own young!

8. If a human sees another creature in distress, they can commonly be observed trying to help! Even at their own risk, most humans are deeply compassionate creatures!

9. If a human hears a particularity catchy sound or tune, it will often mimic it, even to the point of annoying themselves!

10. Sneezes are entirely involuntary, and completely adorable. Especially when the human in question becomes frustrated

11. Humans love treats!!! Some more than others. Many humans will save these treats specifically for a later date when they are in need of comfort or reassurance. IE, pickles, pop tarts, Popsicles, etc

12. They’re learning to travel in space!!! They can’t get very far, but they’re trying!!! So far, they’ve made it to the end of their yard, and have found rocks

[i-love--you]

If you’re reading this I want you to know it’s okay to make mistakes just please don’t forget all the good things you’ve done because those do matter more