ittomi

[ittomi]

wicked • 19

↳ Summary: In a desperate hope to stop war from breaking you are a serviced to wed the most vile man alive, the one who has committed atrocities and war crimes beyond comprehension, he who is responsible for the fall of many nations, the wicked prince who’s heart is made of stone. You are to marry a man who challenges every belief and moral you stand for, all while being faced in a foreign land with nobody but yourself too trust…But are you both truly that different? Or is hate not too far from love?

↳ Pairing: Jungkook/reader

↳ Genre: arranged marriage AU, enemies to lovers, it’s kind of a period AU??? Historical but also technically not? prince!AU, eventual smut

Word Count: 13k

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tags: vaginal fingering, tiddy sucking (jk is definitely a boobs man), semi public sex??, oral (f), so many petnames, dom!kook, brief masturbation (m), multiple orgasms, size kink, multiple positions, cowgirl, creampies, slight somnophilia? (they keep having sex when they're both extremely exhausted), spooning turned to doggy, some very filthy talk, corruption kink, semi degradation kink, the word seed is used once and I actually hate it, some sweet, sweet aftercare, pillow talk, grinding, cumplay, brief handjob (m), edging, cockwarming, they're so in love your honor

Note: people will be shocked at how fast this update has come out and honestly ?? so am I, but tbf half of it is smut so...iykyk ALSO if you haven't checked out the playlist for wicked, you totally should!!

After the first snowfall, winter had come rolling in with no sign of stopping and just as Jungkook had once said, Penumbra was now buried in snow. 

There was something so captivating about the snow, its crisp frosty delicate nature, how despite the sun being covered in clouds, the snow reflected off the light and made everything so much brighter. 

The land was so desolate and yet so full at the same time, it left a deep yearning in you for the warmth, but in an oddly fulfilling way, it let you rest deeper at night, taking in the great vastness of the land and its minimalism. 

The morning had been busy just as each morning before had been so, Yule was only a week away and the court had many aristocrats staying at the castle making merry. It was such a celebratory time and yet you still felt like a ghost better left in the past.

Your days were not all horrible, but the constant numbness never fully went away, at one time you had wanted to go to Yule in Kimhae to reunite with your parents, but the idea of leaving somehow filled you with as much anxiety as staying.

“Well? What’s on your mind?” Jungkook finally spoke, not looking up from his work book, making sure the last of his bill signs, contracts carefully written out and correspondence dealt with so he wouldn’t be behind on his work when you both made your return.

You had been admittedly antsy, tidying up your bedroom, packing what few trinkets you thought you might want during the nights of your journey, fiddling with your own work and where to put what.

You simply couldn’t sit still.

You didn’t reply for a long moment causing Jungkook to look up from his desk, blue eyes appearing from those dark thick locks of hair.

Sighing you shifted as you set your book against the bed, “…You’ll be mad at me.”

“Well you don’t know until you tell me.” Jungkook didn’t seem worried.

You glanced away once more as Jungkook stood up, rounding his desk to walk over to you, “…What if I was having second thoughts…About going to Kimhae?”

Jungkook curved a brow, “The morning we depart for our trip?”

“Don’t say it like that!” You pouted with an usher.

“Is it really the trip? Or is it something else?” Jungkook replied, brushing off your pout.

Your pout however only furthered because you didn’t have an answer, “I don’t know…I just…this is the first time we’ll be making a public appearance outside of Penumbra since our wedding.”

“And what about it?” Jungkook shifted, crossing his arms, still not understanding what your problem was and truth be told you wish you had a better answer for him. 

“Does that not make you anxious? It makes me incredibly anxious.” You frowned, wringing your hands together, you were anxious about everything truthfully, but the idea of making your first appearance in nearly a year, well…You didn’t know what to expect. 

But then again, Penumbra had prepared you for pretty much everything at this point, there weren't too many boxes left to check off on life events at this point. 

“Why would I be?” Jungkook cocked his head to the side, “I’ve nothing to hide nor prove to anyone…If you’re anxious simply because, then it’s understandable,” Jungkook reached out to you, brushing his palm over your cheek before it crept down to your neck, “A lot has happened, I think it’s only natural. But I also know you’ve been looking forward to seeing your parents for the majority of your stay here, it would be imprudent of me to let you cancel our trip at the last minute.” 

Your lips quivered a little, “Even if I’m terrified? What if something happens?” 

Jungkook’s lips curled into a little smile, his fingers curling around your neck, not squeezing, but in a loving hold you had grown so acquainted too, “Then I will be there to stop it from happening,” Jungkook’s forehead pressed down against yours, “I know you’ll regret not going more then if you do.” 

Your eyes fluttered shut before you leaned over to bury your face into the crook of his neck, Jungkook’s arms wrapping around you tight as you murmured, “I hope you’re right.” curling your arms around his waist as you let yourself become engulfed in his warmth and letting it swallow all of your consuming thoughts. 

It stayed like this for a long minute before Jungkook slowly pulled away, looking down at you as he spoke, “I have something I wanted to give you.”

You pulled away from him more to get a better look at him, tilting your head in curiosity, “A gift…?” 

Jungkook snorted, “Something like that. I wasn’t sure if it would be finished in time, but Jimin managed to get it to me last night.” He let go of you before walking over to the bed, leaning down as he pulled down out from underneath. 

You tilted your head at the thick cloth cover as Jungkook stood up, holding it out to you. It was long and thin but held a considerable weight to it, not too heavy, but just enough to let you know it was of incredible quality. 

He nodded at you as a gesture to pull whatever was inside out, opening the draw strings. The first thing you saw was the bright silver crest of a pommel, pulling it out further was a soft leather hand and pulling it all the way out revealed a shortsword around twenty three inches. 

You couldn’t help but let your lips part at just how beautiful it was though, the metal was reflective and the detailing along the fuller, the blade was double edged and as your eyes traveled back to the handle you noticed a sort of…language? Written down the grip.

“It’s the first of its kind,” Jungkook finally spoke, “Noxtria melted with Quicksilver for a lightweight balanced sword but sharp enough to cut through thick metal. Godslayer is it’s name.”

“Godslayer?” You looked up at him. 

“The idea behind this blade was that it would be lighter than air, but have the strength to kill a god. I couldn’t think of a better person to hold the first blade of its kind than my own wife. We’ve been working on your swordsmanship for a long time now and I think it’s time you carry your own sword.” Jungkook nodded, a sort of pride in his eyes as he watched you weigh it, giving it a whirl in your hand. 

The training you had done had definitely made you physically stronger, as while the blade had weight, it wasn’t taxing to hold, “I want you to never feel defenseless by my side, we’re partners and equals and while I hope it never again comes to you needing to use this, I want you to have it if the occasion were to ever arise.” 

You were speechless as you stared at the blade, a reflection of yourself in its metal staring back at you, lowering it you whispered, “Thank you, Jungkook.” 

A small smile pulled on his lips, “Anything for my little sun.” His fingers traced down your cheek, “The case for it is still in the cover, here I’ll help you with putting on the harness.” 

Jungkook took the cloth covering off it to reveal the heavy black sheath and the harness that it attached too, Jungkook had carefully pulled it around your hip, adjusting it until it was snug against your skin, it felt weird having such a thing attached to your body now. 

But there was something oddly…safe about it, as Jungkook said, this was a safety measure and it made you feel as such, you could only hope you would never have to take another soul but….Your fingers unconsciously lifted, rubbing over the spot on your chest, now scarred from where Di Jin had attempted to kill you. 

Jungkook as if knowing what you were thinking tenderly grabbed your hand pulling it away, “It’s difficult to see it now but…” He paused for a moment as if gathering his thoughts, “I think…if I could go back and change things I would, in a heartbeat. But I do think it happened for a reason.” 

Your lips trembled softly, “How could killing someone happen for a reason?” 

“It made a spectacle for one,” Jungkook replied, a certain soft note in his voice was his hand found its way back to your neck, “Those who doubted your ability to hold your own in the court will never question it again. Your words have always had bite, but now you have proof behind them.”

You shook your head, “I don’t see eye to eye with you on this Jungkook.”

“I know you don’t,” Jungkook replied, his thumb soothingly rubbing into your skin, “And I wouldn’t expect anything less, but your respect in the court is much more now than it ever was before. Not only this but…”

Jungkook paused for a long moment gathering his thoughts, “Knowing you have the capability to defend yourself…there will be times when we will have no choice but to be apart,” He sighed, “I will eventually have to lead projects that take me away from Penumbra, knowing you have the means to take care of yourself puts me at ease.” 

“I don’t want you to be apart from me.” You mumbled, anxiety at the thought immediately quelling.

Jungkook let out an amused breath, “That’s not something to worry about now, one thing at a time. If you have the rest of your things settled, we should head down, the sooner we get on the road the sooner we’ll arrive, and the sooner you’ll feel better.” 

“...I suppose.” You mumbled, but Jungkook was not feeding into your pouty expression, no matter how much it was his weakness, he grabbed your thick cloak which had laid abandoned on the bed, wrapping it over your shoulders as he buckled it up, grabbing his own to carry as he held out his arm for you. 

Letting him guide you down you ignored the stares of a group of court ladies staring you down, perhaps in wariness, perhaps because the court had easily taken notice of how close you and Jungkook had become in the last few weeks. 

The consummation of your marriage hadn’t actually changed anything, but Jungkook’s confession of love had really done a number on you both, and every time those sweet words left his lips you had the intention of saying it back. 

And yet every time it felt like the word got stuck in your throat unable to escape, perhaps it was because you were still scared, still in disbelief that Jungkook loved you, but all of his actions, his words, even the way he looked at you, it all screamed love.

Being met with snow on the ground, crunching beneath your feet you let out a breath that you could visibly see, a sensation you still weren’t quite used to, it was freezing cold and the journey would be very long. 

Jungkook had spared no expense to keep you wrapped in very thick layers in hopes that it would keep you warm, but it seemed no matter the amount, you were always cold. 

“Wheein is doing her last rounds of gathering items, she should be out shortly,” Taehyun called out, finishing fixing up your horse’s saddle, Jungkook walked up with you before helping you on and making sure you were situated before saddling his own horse. 

“Snow isn’t too deep yet, we should make a timely arrival,” Yoongi called out, trotting on his own horse up the path ahead before stopping next to Jungkook, “If we make it with not much snowfall, it should only take four days.” 

Your lip curled a little at the estimate, you knew Kimhae was further away then Eunoia, but you had been used to only a day’s travel when you were in Eunoia, they lived further West then Eunoia and a little further south. 

The climate in the West however made it incredibly dry, the further you traveled the less snow there would be, hopefully at least. 

Once Wheein had finished her last round of gathering any last minute packing she had come out with a few guards help and finished loading the pack horses and then mounted her own. It wasn't too big of an entourage of servants, but you had two of Yoongi’s men, himself and of course your two personal servants to attend you both. 

You were nervous for many reasons, showing your face to the outside world, you weren’t sure what reaction you would gain, knowing how the truth of Penumbra had been twisted beyond recognition, you could distinctly remember all the dread you had for two years of being engaged to Jungkook. 

Words that he had abused women in many ways, that he starved all of his servants and that he’d beat them if they disobeyed, rumors swirling that he already had multiple wives and you would be another trophy in his collection, some rumors even going as far as to say he had his dead enemies taken to the castle so he could bath in their blood. 

The list went on and on and every single one was just a rumor, nothing more than foolish lies spread to cause more fear, Jungkook was not a single thing he had ever been stated as, wicked least of all. 

But you were now nervous because you had seen both sides, the truth and lies both, and you couldn’t help but wonder what rumors had escaped Penumbra about you? Dread filled you once more, what twisted way could the world turn your murder of Di Jin even worse? 

That you feasted on his corpse? 

You could briefly taste the raw iron in your mouth that had you holding back a gag, Jungkook’s sharp gaze that had been looking ahead immediately on you, “What’s wrong?” 

You held your hand on your mouth trying desperately hard to not let the memory suck you back into the past, flashes of blood in your mind, cartilage mixed with skin, the raw smell of blood, “Water, can I have some water.” You forced the words out. 

Jungkook wordlessly pulled the water satchel from the side of his saddle, handing it to you, “You’re thinking.” 

You took a large swallow and slowly the faint taste faded back into the nothingness it came from, you shook your head handing it back to him, “I’m trying not too.” 

“You’re not doing a good job of it,” Jungkook replied, making you give him a look, he laughed a little though you spot the concern in his eyes, “Would talking about it make you feel better?” 

You sighed as you shook your head, “I think i’d rather talk about something else,” Lingering on your thoughts would only serve to possibly bring memories even more vivid back, “You’ve been to Kimhae right Jungkook?” 

Jungkook guided his horse a little closer to yours so you’d be able to converse better, “It’s been a long time. We visited when they hosted the War Council. I was…maybe seventeen? This was just in the beginning of negotiating,” Jungkook hummed as he thought about it, “Kimhae was dull in my opinion, they lacked conviction and were very obvious in the fact that they didn’t respect Penumbra or the Jeon name.” 

You listened to him before you let out a laugh gaining his attention, “I remember this quite well, I was visiting Seokjin at the time. I remember spotting you and your father arriving out my window but you were too far for me to get a good look. I remember him complaining though. Telling me you had this haughty look about you, acting as if you were better than him.”

Jungkook scoffed, “I was better than him. I am still better than him. If you were present at the time though…Why had I not seen you?” He looked a bit confused, as obviously women weren’t allowed in the War Room but that didn’t mean they were prohibited anywhere else, he had stayed a full fortnite at Kimhae that trip and not once had he seen you. 

“I made myself unknown on purpose,” You replied, a small frown tugging on your lips, “It was at Seokjin’s insistence of course, he didn’t want you near me with the potential to ‘corrupt me’, as he said.” 

“Corrupt you?” Jungkook scoffed, almost offended, “If we had met properly before our engagement, I feel we could’ve been cordial. Come to think of it I do remember talk of the Eunoian Princess, being in court,” Jungkook’s gaze became pensive as his brows pinched together, “I remember Seokjin gloating about how the fairest princess warmed his bed at night and that he loved nothing more then his name screamed in pleasure.”

You blinked multiple times before your gaze shot to Jungkook, “This was in reference to me?” 

You had known Jungkook long enough now to tell he was absolutely wrought with anger at just the idea, his knuckles tight on the reigns of his horse as he stared ahead, “Mhm. I once told you that we saw him differently, that’s one of the many reasons why. He loved to peacock around gloating about sleeping with you.” 

“Sleeping with me!?” Your mouth parted in somewhat disbelief, “We…” You couldn’t help but let out a scoffed laugh, he had been pressuring you for some time, but you never realized just how desperate he was to go out of his way to lie to other men that you both had slept with one another in such a way. 

And then the embarrassment began to flood in, was this why so many men in his court assumed you were loose, or that you were an easy woman? 

“Well I can promise you he was nothing more than a liar,” You let out another laugh as you shook your head, “Screaming his name in pleasure…The only name that was ushered was my own and even then that was on a lucky day.”

“Your name!?” Jungkook sucked in a harsh breath of air. 

You paused, suddenly realizing what you had just said, and then looking around, there was a good distance between Yoongi up ahead with his fellow guards and Wheein and Taehyun were conversing further behind, Fenrir having walked alongside you awhile now. 

“So Seokjin has gotten to experience that sort of intimacy from you.” Jungkook pressed his tongue into his cheek as if this was the worst news he could ever receive. 

“It’s not…” You sighed, trying to find the right words, you had never really planned on mentioning what little intimacy you shared with Seokjin, as it wasn’t relevant to your current relationship and truthfully, there wasn’t much to talk about, “I’ve…When we first started to explore an intimate relationship together, you remember me being frightened by it, yes?” 

Jungkook tilted his head, a little confused as to where this was going but nodded regardless. 

“The same could be said for back then- especially back then,” You explained as you lowered your voice a little, “I was nervous to lose my virginity, Seokjin already didn’t like my traditional Eunoian attire, but even moreso it had him acting out, trying to pressure me into giving myself to him. But I could never commit to it. The idea of him leaving me after I gave it too him made me too anxious…And..”

You sighed as you glanced down at the snowy earth, “I hated feeling like nothing more than a sexual fantasy for him. Looking back, it feels as if that was all I ever provided, some sort of exotic fantasy that he could escape to in Eunoia, never truly a person, a soul, just something to make him aroused and fulfilled. And so to keep him satiated but also withhold my own boundary, I offered to pleasure him,” You pressed your lips together, your nose wrinkling, “It wasn’t very often, nor was it very pleasant but well…It kept things from escalating beyond my control.”

Jungkook’s jaw only clenched, “How different things would’ve been if we had met that week. Perhaps you could have been saved from all that trouble.” 

“Things happened the way they did though,” You offered a weak smile, “It’s not something I ever think about anymore, after all, it feels so long ago despite being so recent. And I’m very content now.” 

You reached out to grab his hand as your smile brightened, “I’m happy I saved myself for the right person. I couldn’t imagine it with anyone else.” 

This seemed to soothe Jungkook in the right way, “Well when you say it like that it makes me think you’ll want extra help to keep warm tonight.” 

“Jungkook!” You smacked his shoulder, “What an indecent thing to suggest, in a tent? In the middle of a journey?” 

Jungkook chuckled as he gripped his reins in contentment, “No better time than the present princess.” 

You only shook your head, the hours seemed to go quick as you and Jungkook had talked about this and that, and then a content silence took over as the sky darkened and Yoongi had begun to look for a suitable spot to make camp.

They had managed to find a spot off road closer to the woods where the cold wind was blocked and snow wasn’t as deep, clearing off the snow before getting fresh cut wood to get a fire going, setting up tents didn’t take very long. 

Soon dinner was cooking over the fire, granted you had already eaten an abundant mix of packed cabbage and vegetables tossed together and despite being tired and hungry Jungkook was still easily fending you off as metal clashed together. 

“You’ll need to try harder than that princess,” Jungkook whirled the sword in his hand as you huffed a breath, stretching your aching arms, “If you were to fight an opponent far more skilled than you in battle what would your tactic be?” 

“Run?” You raised your brows, Jungkook seemed to enjoy asking hypothetical questions that you were certain would never happen. 

“Okay but in this scenario you do, what would you do?” He pressed, giving you a moment to regather yourself. 

“Well it depends, if they’re aggressive, which I assume they would be, it’s not difficult to size my lack of experience up in comparison to someone like you, I’d have no choice but to defend until they burn down their energy and then once they tire out I’d make a chance to strike.” You sighed as you lifted your sword back up. 

“Yes that would be the logical way to go about it,” Jungkook hummed, “Contextually speaking. But there are other ways, you can use your environment to assist you, you could also have another ally help or use your size to your advantage. Being smaller means being quicker. Again.” 

You both tapped swords before sparring once more, Jungkook easily more aggressive this time causing you to back step until you back stepped right into the deeper snow causing you to yelp, whining out at the freezing damp sensation seeping through your dress into your skin. 

“That’s not what I meant when I said use the environment.” Jungkook sighed as he rested the flat of the blade on his shoulder. 

You managed to step out back onto the shallow end as you whined out, “I am perfectly aware of what you meant! I’m trying! I just can’t seem to get it…” You let out a defeated sigh as a tremor jolted through your body at catching the cold nip of breeze. 

Jungkook only shook his head somewhat amused, “How about we rest for the evening and get you close to the fire once more.” His hand curling around your waist as you both walked back to camp, “You shouldn’t have such high expectations of yourself, I’ve been training since I was a child, you’ve come a long way for only training the last six months.”

“Sparring is also different then a real duel or battle,” Yoongi spoke, as he had been watching you both the last hour in amusement, “If you’re already doing this good in a spar, you’ll be able to hold your own perfectly fine in either.” 

“This is also true,” Jungkook yawned as he sat down on the large mat, offering a hand to you to help you down, “The adrenaline is different, when it comes to life or death, you fight with more than your all, more than you could ever muster for a spar, even a duel.” 

“I just hope it never comes to that.” You sighed with a shiver, scooting closer to the warmth of the fire. 

“What matters is that you’ll be ready m’lady.” Wheein offered a kind smile as she continued, “And I agree with his Highness, you’ve improved significantly compared to when you first started, it’s something to take pride in, you’ll only improve with time.” 

“The chances are slim but it never hurts to be prepared,” Yoongi chimed in once more, “Dinner is ready.”

The rest of the evening had passed with laughter and fellowship that you found yourself truly enjoying, and at some point you had tried to remember when the last time you had felt this at ease, this…at home? 

Even in Eunoia, tragedy had always surrounded you during your youth, uncertainty of the war and the future as a growing lady and plunged into icy fear as a young woman, you wanted to say you had other moments of relaxation. 

But you couldn’t think of a single time, except for this moment, you found yourself curling up against Jungkook, yawning as your eyes began to droop and your head resting on his shoulder.

When your eyes opened once more, you were uncertain of how much time had passed other than the indication that everyone else had departed to their tents. 

Jungkook had been leaning on one hand, the other wrapped around you as he had stared thoughtfully in the fire before realizing you had awoke, “Are you ready to depart for bed?” 

It was a quiet usher that made you nod with another yawn, letting him help you up as you walked over to your shared tent.

Due to the few people in your party, a circle of tents was formed, yours however just a little closer to the fire upon your request and how could you be blamed on a frigid night such as this? Even Fenrir was curled up right next to the fire, paying you both no mind as he continued to rest. 

The tent wasn’t extremely spacious, but it gave you enough room to get what you needed done without being on top of one another, “Let’s get you out of this.” 

“And into what?” You were more awake now than before, “Did Wheein leave me something?” 

Jungkook looked down at you, a sort of boyish look on his face making you pinch him, “Don’t look at me like that,” He chuckled softly grabbing your hand away from his bicep, “We have plenty of furs, and i’ll let you sleep on the fireside, it’s making me hot being that close anyways.” 

“It’s too cold!” You whined out quietly. 

“You really want to sleep like that?” Jungkook was already stripping himself, “I’m burning up personally.” 

Your lips parted multiple times at the sight of his chiseled muscles, biceps flexing as he pulled down his pants revealing the taunt thick muscles of his thighs, even more notably his undergarments.

“Come,” Jungkook had a small smirk on his face as if knowing your eyes roamed his body despite how hard you were trying to be discreet, “Let me undress you.” 

You let out a discontented noise but it was difficult to say no when he looked like this and he was looking at you like that, shuffling over you sat on your knees in front of him, Jungkook leaned forward peeling off each layer with a sort of lethargy, as if in no big hurry. 

Despite the chilled air you could still feel the lick of fire through the thick cloth tent, dropping the last layer down your shoulders you shuddered, a sort of shyness creeping over you as you felt your nipples immediately hardening at being exposed.

Jungkook helped you shuffled out of the last layer, in nothing more than your panties now, “It’s freezing,” You whispered, trying hard to not let yourself feel self conscious at being close to naked in the tinted firelight that your husband could easily see, “If you’re content let’s go to bed.” 

“Ah,” Jungkook immediately stopped you, eyes staying on your soft perked tits, “The cold will help keep you healthy.” He had a stupid boyish look on his face again as he leaned in, warm breath fanning along your cheek before he leaned down unable to resist parting his lips to take your left tit into his mouth. 

You let out a breath louder than you intended, but the you couldn’t help it, the sharp contrast between the cold air and his warm wet tongue had your body flush with arousal, and clearly you weren’t the only one as your eyes dropped down, a solid print formed showing your husband was also feeling the same. 

“Jungkook, it's too cold for this…!” You whined out quietly despite your legs immediately parting for him to sit between as he moaned against your breast, other hand squeezing your left tit as he pinched your hardened bud between his thumb and finger while suckling on the other.

You forced the moan back into your throat.

Jungkook finally released your bud from his lips, looking up at you with dark eyes full of arousal, “Well then we’ll just have to warm you up then won’t we, my goddess?” His hand slithering down your waist as he parted his lips once more your left tit, sucking harshly making you jolt. 

His fingers pushing beneath your panties as his fingers dragging against your puffy slit as you let out a breathy noise legs parting further for him as you leaned back on your hands, hips shifting to give him more access to your cunt. 

Jungkook was delighted by the invitation you could tell by the way he harshly sucked your bud, middle finger suddenly pushing inside you, sliding in with a slight pinch of discomfort that didn’t last long as he pushed all the way until his knuckle met with your body. 

“We can’t be too loud now,” Jungkook’s lips curled into a smirk, “So you’ll need to be a good girl for me and be quiet.” 

You bit down on your lip as he pushed his index finger inside you the pinched discomfort returning the sensation of his fingers pushing in and out of your little hole had you relaxing into his touch with a soft moan, walls squeezing around his fingers with each thrust. 

“Mmm that’s a good girl,” Jungkook grinned, pupils dilated in lust as he buried his fingers back inside your cunt, feeling your little walls clench around him once more before he brushed his thumb over your clit a higher pitch whine escaping you, “Ah, ah, remember,” Jungkook looked amused, “You need to be quiet if you want to cum all over my fingers princess.” 

“Kook,” You whispered, eyes closed tight at the feeling of his thumb teasingly brushing over your clit, fingers buried deep inside you as your walls tightened around his digits, “Please…!” 

The cold air was wrapping around your body, but the sharp contracts of his warm tongue and fingers burying inside you.

Jungkook laid you back against the fur before pulling your panties off, “You’ll get your pleasure, but you need to be a good girl and wait,” His voice was deep and soft taking off his own underwear to reveal his heavy, thick cock fully hardened, he parted your legs as you tensed cold air invading your cunt as he pushed his fingers back inside you, your clit extra sensitive from the cold with each little brush of his thumb, every little tease sent a sharp jolt of pleasure in your body.

Wet sticky arousal dripping from you little hole as you squeezed around his fingers, wiggling your hips a little with a whine, “Kook, need more..” You whispered out, not liking this slow teasing game. 

“Patience,” Jungkook replied, fingers pulling out of you only a little just to thrust them back in, he did this once more, even rougher, his pace was just right, hitting that sweet little spot inside your body that your walls clenching each time as your legs twitched. 

Jungkook’s free hand rubbed through your puffy wet slit before he gripped the base of his cock, a hissed grunt escaping him as he slowly pumped his base, watching the lewd act immediately made a soft moan escape you, just the idea of his fat cock inside you had you clenching hard around him as he began arithmetically thrusting his fingers into that sweet little spot.

“Fuuck you like watching me stroke my fat cock for you my love?” Jungkook let out a wicked look, his hand running all the way up his cock, thumb messily smearing his precum over his fat bulbous head before running it back down meanwhile his other hand began forcefully shoving inside your little hole greedily.

His thumb circling your clit as pleasure began shooting through your body, your eyes never leaving his cock that he squeezed tightly in his hand pumping it eagerly as his eyes flickered between your cunt sucking in his fingers needily and your face, entranced by his movements.

It made his shaft throb so bad in pleasure it hurt, he threw his head back with a low moan hips lifting as he thrusted his cock into his fist, feeling your little hole squeeze so tight around him it was difficult to move his fingers.

Jungkook locked eyes with you, that wicked look on his face, “What do you think that little ex lover of yours would say if he could see you right now?” 

“Mmm! Right there…!” You whimpered out, struggling to keep your voice quiet as your legs turned limp at how rough he was thrusting his fingers into that sweet little spongy spot inside you, “Kook, right there…!” 

Jungkook lifted his hips once more, fucking his fist at the way your legs lifted up, bringing them to your chest to obediently spread your cunt further for him, “Would he say I’m corrupting you right now?” 

You had to bite down on your hand to fight back the whines and moans trying to escape you, “Please…! Please.” You kept muttering it, body twisting and building so fast your mind was completely blank aside from the filth Jungkook was whispering to you.

“That I’m tainting his pretty little Eunoian princess, filling her cunt up until she’s completely fucked out cumming all over my fingers?” Jungkook harshly squeezed the base of his cock, keeping his knuckles buried in your cunt as he rapidly hit into your g-spot. 

Jungkook wanted to laugh at the strangled high pitched moan escaping you as you desperately tried to keep it quiet, feeling your warm little walls wrap tight around his fingers as you came, arms wrapping around your face to try and keep your cries of pleasure to yourself.

Jungkook eased you through your orgasm before pulling his fingers out of you, low breathes escaping you as your chest lifted and dropped before letting your arms drop from your face to the crude sight of Jungkook’s fingers in his mouth, eyes closed with soft moan as he licked your cum off them.

“This is the best way I could have ever relaxed.” Jungkook pulled his fingers from his mouth with a content look as he laid down next to you, your eyes however still on his hardened cock. 

“But you…” You frowned. 

Jungkook raised his brows before his eyes dropped to his cock before shrugging, “I don’t cum easily, a good and bad thing I guess. C’mere love.” 

“How do you want me?” Jungkook’s eyes snapped back open as they met yours, as if trying to figure out if he heard you correct, “I want you to feel good too, how do you want me?” 

Jungkook moaned softly closing his eyes once more, unable to look at those cute, eager little eyes of yours, basically asking to be filled up by him. 

“Ride my cock.” Jungkook replied, admittedly getting difficult to keep his eyes open, but he’d rather kill himself then miss the opportunity to cum inside your pretty, puffy little cunt. 

You knew what he meant, you had gathered as much the last time but you just… you awkwardly straddled him, his hands on your hips to help guide you, this wouldn’t be as difficult as last time right?

Grabbing his cock in your hand you heard a gritted hiss through his teeth, rubbing his bulbous head through your wet folds before lining him against your entrance, unlike last time you sank onto it.

Biting your lip as you squeezed your eyes shut, rather than a pinch the discomfort was still moderate, but not nearly as much as the first time. 

“Mmm fuck,” Jungkook moaned softly, still unable to process that he was getting to feel your warm little walls wrapping around his thick head, “Does it still hurt?” 

His hands soothingly rubbed up to your waist before back to your hips, “A little,” You whispered, settling your hands on his chest, “I still don’t know what I’m doing.” 

Jungkook opened his lidded eyes, trying his damn hardest to not fall asleep right now, “It’s not difficult, just a matter of practice. Sink a little lower…” Jungkook bit his lower lip a little at watching his cock sink further inside your warm cunt, “Now lift your hips like this.” 

You let his hands guide your movements as you let out a soft whine, the pain subsiding as his cock began to slide inside you with ease, stuffing you so full it was difficult to believe you had something this big inside you. 

Just the feeling of his heavy cock burying inside your cunt made your walls wrap tighter around him, slowly bouncing on his cock as Jungkook’s hands settled on your hips, “Fuck yeah love, just like that, riding my fuckin’ cock like you were made for it.” 

His words of pleasure made you bounce a little faster, taking him a little deeper each time before his hands tightened on your hips, suddenly grabbing you and pulling you all the way down, you let out a tiny whine at being so full of cock with no warning, walls rapidly clenching around him as you moaned.

Jungkook’s eyes were closed as he let out a breathy deep moan, “Could fall asleep like this every night, use my pretty little wife as my personal cock warmer, mmm keep squeezing around me like that.” He had a sleepy smirk on his face as his hands wrapped around your ass, urging you to start riding him once more. 

You quickly found you loved being full of cock though, cunt split open by something so thick and heavy, excitement trilled through your body making your walls wrap tight around him as you began bouncing on his cock.

Letting out quiet moans at the feeling of his shaft hitting all the right places inside you, “Mmm yeah, oh…fuck…” You whined out softly, sitting up right as you bounced all the down his cock as you grinded against his pubic bone.

Jungkook forced his tired eyes open to the amazing sight of you, his pretty wife completely naked bouncing on his cock, tits bouncing and face fucked out, clearly pleasuring yourself now, “Make me cum,” He moaned out softly, “Let me fill that pretty little cunt up.” 

You kept trying to bite back your whines as your hips became more messy in bouncing, uneven and unsteady as pleasure quickly built inside you, sinking back on his cock as your walls tightened, moaning just a hair louder as you creamed all over his cock. 

Jungkook was tired, sleep near taking him the same way you took his cum, letting it shoot deep inside you as you swiveled your hips, taking every lost drop he’d give as quiet breathes filled the tent, your own eyes closed with that same unmistakable tiredness. 

Jungkook let out a tired smile, “What a good girl.” He pulled you onto his chest, shifting you both to be buried beneath the blankets and furs, being skin to skin made you realize just how cold you had been. 

Jungkook’s skin was like fire, hot to the touch and your own personal little fire, curling up against him, your eyes immediately fell heavy, sleep had never felt so peaceful as being skin to skin with your husband.

The journey to Kimhae had been rather uneventful and what few encounters you had with wolves and even a bear, Fenrir had easily warded them off, your baby having grown so much in the last months now standing just a little taller than your horse.

Jungkook had been up ahead chatting with Yoongi for awhile now, something regarding plans on resuming the Eastern movement when you returned from Yule.

Wheein had been riding by you for awhile now in a comfortable silence aside from a few comments to Fenrir who had been running ahead in the snow and finding random branches to be thrown, the only problem being they were too heavy for you to toss. 

“Something on your mind Wheein?” You finally asked, having noticed a faraway look in her eyes for a good while now. 

Her eyes met yours before she gave a small, weak smile, “Nothing incredibly important I just…” She faltered a little, “I know the past cannot be changed but, I can’t help but feel like so many events could have been avoided if it weren’t for me.” 

You straightened up, frowning immediately at her words, “What would make you say that?”

Wheein hesitated to speak, “...What happened, with my execution, you…” It looked as if it was physically difficult to attempt to finish her sentence, “I know how important keeping your culture intact is for you. You’ve done nothing but try to become a Penumbrian Princess, and for you to be put in a position where you had to compromise your own personal oath and belief…” Wheein let out a shaky breath, visibly puffing in the cold air as her eyes looked watery, “I feel as though I haven’t given you a proper apology M’lady.” 

Your heart felt like it was twisted, “You have nothing to apologize over Wheein. I am still mourning many things but I…I don’t regret what I did. I said it once and I will say it again, I was willing to do anything to get you back. Di Jin was the assassin who attempted to kill me, which started this entire mess…I don’t know how much you’ve heard about the Estate…”

Wheein’s lips stayed in a frown, cheeks flush and rosy from the cold wind as she adjusted her shawl, shaking her head, “Only whispers of rumors to what happened, and my own assumptions when you intervened on my execution.” 

You let out a shaky sigh, trying your best to detach yourself from the memory as you recalled the events that lead up to that fateful night, “They had lured Yoongi away and I foolishly sent him in good faith that nothing would happen but…Di Jin revealed himself that night revealing that he had come to finish what he started. He almost did,” Your hand trembled as you pressed it against your chest, “Then he got closer to me, trying to kiss my neck and…I don’t know.”

And that was the funniest part, you still had vivid clips of what happened in your head, but it was all so fast, so gorey, your mind had blotted out a lot of it, “One minute he was on top of me, and the next minute I was covered in blood.” 

There it was, that distinct iron on your tongue, it made you sick to your stomach, “And I didn’t stop after he was dead,” Your lips trembled as you whispered, “That’s the part that scares me the most. He was dead and I kept going, I...it was like I was possessed, unable to stop. I felt…” It felt like bile was beginning to rise in your throat as you swallowed it back, “Good. Powerful, invincible in that moment, feeling his flesh in my mouth, the taste of his blood on my tongue-” 

Your hand suddenly grabbed your lips, trying to swallow back the bile which risen much faster, immediately grabbing the water satchel that hung off the saddle of your horse, taking a long drink from it to try and wash what you had just admitted away. 

It had been plaguing the back of your mind every moment it was quiet, the fact that something inside you liked it, even enjoyed the depraved act, showing someone who had disrespected you and your heritage, making a mockery of it for so long, a little devil inside you secretly wishing you had finished what you had started, to devoured him the way your ancestors would. 

Even now a little voice in the back of your head was thrilled by it, it never ceased to make you sick, Weak in the stomach with shame every time it crossed your mind, it felt so heretical to think let alone voice aloud, the extent of how much a secret part of you enjoyed it. 

“I am so sorry Princess,” Wheein whispered, clearly hurting for you as she held back her tears, inhaling sharply, “I still can’t believe what’s happened. I’m sure being away from Penumbra will be a good break for all of us.” 

“If I had just…” You had to stop yourself from saying what you wanted, you had the ability to heal Wheein’s mother, maybe if you had listened to Baba Enàir more carefully, had been more dedicated to your studies as a child…perhaps this whole thing could have been prevented if you had been the one to heal Wheein’s mother, disputing any claims, “I’ll never send you away so often like that without company, I never want to put you in such a compromising position Wheein and for that I am sorry.”

“We all have our grievances about what happened.” Wheein smiled sadly, “But what counts is that we are both alive and well, but…Something else does plague me.” 

You tilted your head, patiently waiting for her to continue as she gathered her thoughts, the wind blowing her black locks of hair back as she squinted her eyes, “We still never caught who sent the assassin. What if this happens once more?” 

You frowned, you had thought this as well, “Something tells me, whoever did this will try a different tactic next. We must remain vigilant, perhaps moreso in Penumbra then even in Kimhae.” You nodded in thought, “I do agree though, this will be good for all of us.” 

This had become routine at night it seemed, waiting for everyone else to depart to bed before being guided back yourself, undressed by your husband’s large, warm hands, and then taken whatever way he wanted, with his hands, his tongue, his cock, you weren’t picky. 

You however were starting to become used to the sensation of his cock spliting you open, his cum dripping down your thighs, an unfamiliar soreness between your legs that had a sweet ache that made you crave more. 

You had never understood the idea of physical intimacy in the past, it always made your skin crawl at the idea, but then again, you never had a partner you felt you could trust like this.

More than anything, you loved being close to him like this, loved that you could be so intimate with the person you trusted more than anyone, his arms wrapped around you, laying slightly on top of your back, keeping you warm just as he promised every night. 

It was odd, the comfort it brought feeling his warm cum dribbling from your little hole as you yawned, eyes closing as you dozed off in his arms. 

It was still late into the night when you awoke to his lips pressing on your neck, moaning softly as his hips rutted into you, cock hardened once more much to your sleepy surprise, “Mm, need you my love.” His voice was much deeper, telling you he was also half asleep, “Dreamt of your pretty little cunt, letting me fill it up.”

“Mmm Kook.” You mumbled out, eyes closing as you felt your leg being propped further up to give him better access to your little entrance, his arms tightened around your waist as he managed to line his cock up before pushing it in. 

A soft sleepy moan escaped you, an entirely new position you were acquainted with but something about it made you feel so full, his cock pushing all the way inside you until his hips were flush with yours. 

Each lazy thrust of his hips had soft noises escaping you, your eyes shutting in tired bliss at his cock pushing past your little walls, filling you to the brim each time, throbbing as the head of his cock kept hitting that spongy little spot. 

Jungkook moaned as he buried his cock inside you once more, his movements having paused forcing your eyes back open, was he asleep? Your walls suddenly squeezed around his cock at being so split open by him.

This elicited a moan from his lips that sounded like pure sex, “Your cunt is heaven,” He mumbled in your skin, “Could keep my cock buried inside you forever.”

Not moving was stirring you further, making you more awake as you whined, “Jungkook, move…!” You wiggled your hips a little earning a small thrust from him.

“Think I’ll asleep like this,” He moaned once more into your skin, “Like the way your cunt wraps around me like this when I’m splitting your cunt open.” 

Jungkook moaned at feeling your cunt squeeze around him once more at his words, just like he had hoped, “Just go back to sleep my love,” He mumbled in your ear, hand pulling around to cup your tit in his hand as he massaged it making you whine in frustration as your hips began to pull and lift, sliding his cock in and out of your cunt just a little. 

“Mmm fuuck, sweetheart go to sleep.” Jungkook’s voice was a pitch higher than before, his free hand almost guiding your hips though as you fucked back against him, and your eyes were closed but sleep was not on your mind. 

Your lips parted with a soft whine at the new sensation this position gave you with him behind, his cock slide inside you just the right way brushing that sweet little spot with each bounce of your hips, it had you rapidly clenching around his cock. 

Muffling your moans into your blankets as you pushed all the way back against him wiggling your hips as pleasure throbbed throughout your cunt, feeling arousal dripping from your hole as his cock slid back inside you with ease as you let out a pathetic whine, walls wrapping harsh around him but it just wasn’t quite enough to get yourself to orgasm. 

Jungkook let out a sleepy chuckle, “Working yourself up are you?” 

It wasn’t fair…! He woke you up and you were somehow the one falling apart on his cock desperate to cum, “Koo, please.” You whimpered out quietly, shifting yourself a little to be better able to lift your hips up to his, giving his cock better access to slid in and out of your little hole with ease. 

“Mmm shit, your acting like a bitch in heat,” He moaned softly, eyes dropping to your cunt that kept backing into his cock, “You want to be fucked?” He whispered deviously in your ear. 

And Jungkook knew you did, could feel the way your walls wrapped so tight around his throbbing cock, wanting so desperately to reach your climax. 

“Jungkook…” You whispered urgently. 

“Say it.”

You let out a frustrated noise, pausing your movement but Jungkook wasn’t having it, his hand wrapping around your neck as he gave it a harsh squeeze, letting out a small gag as his voice deepened in your ear, “Beg for it little princess, beg for me. Beg for my cock.” 

Jungkook suddenly thrusted inside you, harshly making your body jolt as you whined out, shaking your head, this only made him thrust rougher causing you to squeeze around him in excitement, “Mmm like this, feels…! Good.” You whimpered out quietly, your body twitching as pleasure blossomed in your cunt, you were so close…!

Jungkook buried back inside you, stopping once more causing a louder fussy whine to escape you, his hand squeezing around your neck once more, “If you like this then you’ll love what’s next. But you need to tell me, c’mon,” His hips lazily swiveled before giving short thrusts, edging your body as your hands curled into fists, “Tell me you want my cock, that you want your pretty little cunt destroyed by me, that you want to be filled with my cum.”

You could feel saliva dripping from the corner of your mouth, his cock teasing your body with such short movements it had you whimpering, “Koo’, fuck me, please…! Need you’, need your cock, anything…!” 

Jungkook moaned as your quiet frantic plea’s as he suddenly pulled out of you, a sharp whine escaping you as he swatted your ass to be quiet, manhandling you onto you stomach as he kneeled between your legs you felt confused before your hips were lewdly lifted, presenting your cunt to him. 

You didn’t have any time to adjust or even think before his cock pushed back inside you, a moan much louder than you meant for it to escape your lips at an entirely new, better sensation, every movement of his cock had you cunt squeezing in pleasure. 

“Mmm yeah, you like being made to take it from behind?” Jungkook moaned, keeping your hips up as he thrusted inside your little entrance, watching it split open for his cock before greedily sucking it in, “Maybe this is how your little dryad kin had children? Fucking like animals?” He whispered out, hearing a gurgled whine from you only made his thrusts that much more forceful, the sound of his balls smacking into your skin music to his ears, “Being made into nothing more than a bitch desperate for cock.” 

The side of your face was planted into the ground, eyes shut in pleasure at just how good it felt, his cock hitting every little sensitive spot inside you, his demeaning words that would’ve sent flames of angry through your body once upon a time only filled you with excitement, enjoying how he manhandled you how rough he was starting to thrust, no regard for whether your cunt could take it or not. 

Your mind was filled with all sorts of unholy things, not realizing how much you were beginning to moan, enjoying the way he had a hand pressed into your back forcing you down on the ground, his balls smacking your skin and his cock pushing past your tight walls. 

“Koo’...! ‘m gonna..! Mmm!” Your moans were gurgled, desperate, cunt rapidly squeezing around his cock, a feeling he had quickly grown to love as you crumbled beneath him, at his mercy as he roughly thrusted, burying his cock deep inside you as he quickly leaned over you, chest flush with your back as his hips became faster.

Just as you let out the whinest, loudest cry his hand covered your mouth to muffle it, tears began to build in your eyes at how powerful the pleasure was building in your body, your legs uselessly twitching and your body convulsing.

But it was all useless as his cock kept sliding in and out of your small hole, “Go on sweetheart, mm know how bad you wanna cum. I see those pathetic little tears. Cum sweetheart, cream all over my fat cock, make it nice and messy for me.” 

Your body was being jolted with every thrust of his hips, your clit aching to be touched as your cunt was full of his thick shaft, his dirty words whispered in your ear making you throw a whiny pathetic fit as your walls squeezed even tighter around him, so desperate to be obedient. 

“C’mon princess,” Jungkook moaned tantalizingly in your ear, his hips pounding into you with nice lengthy thrusts, wet lewd sounds coming from how soaked you were, “Can feel it, feel how bad that pretty little cunt wants to cum, squeezing around me so tight, fuuck, that’s it, c’mon.” Jungkook wasn’t intentionally edging you but god did it feel good, you were moaning and crying into his hand, tears slowly beginning to trickle down your face at how good you felt. 

Not a single thought in your head other than his cock stuffing you full, purposely dragging into the little spongy spot each time just edging you a little closer each time to your release.

“Does your little pussy feel good?” He teased you, a wicked grin on his face as his hips pushed fully inside you, giving short thrusts to keep you as full of cock as possible, “You like presenting this little hole to me? Letting me fuck my seed deep inside, my pretty wife who swore she’d never let me cuff her in bed? How does it feel knowing I’m going to fill your pretty little cunt up?”

Jungkook let out a low moan, feeling your muffled voice cry out against the skin of his palm as your cunt rapidly clenched around him cumming so hard it felt like your eyes were rolling to the back of your head. 

And Jungkook wasn’t stopping, his hips slammed into you, wet lewd sounds filling the tent and his balls smacking into your skin as he kept his hand on your mouth to keep your moans and cries of pleasure quiet, unable to subdue them yourself anymore, as the pleasure kept going, his hips jostling you around before you felt it.

“Fuck!” Jungkook growled out, burying his cock inside you as he came, roughly pumping his cock inside you as he let out a shaky moan, letting your greedy cunt suck every drop from him as he moaned, perhaps louder then even he intended. 

After a few more seconds he collapsed on top of you, making you whine, sniffling as you wiped your face as you felt his hand drag to your waist, stroking it tenderly as he pressed a kiss against your neck, “You’re so perfect.” He whispered, pressing another kiss against your skin, “Made for me. Only me.” His hand squeezed your waist, before he laid flat on his back shifting you around to lay against him, your body curling up as you set your head against his chest.

Your thighs were aching and your hand trembled if you looked close enough as you dragged it over his chest.

And for the first time, with the fire illuminating the inside of the tent, you took the time to drag it over the rough skin of his chest and upon closer inspection noticed all sorts of marks, curiously you shifted once more. 

“Was twice not enough for my little sun?” Jungkook chuckled as you straddled his waist, his hands wrapping around your hips, “We’ll need to start retiring earlier if you want me to have more stamina.” 

“I’m not…!” You felt your body flush, trying to remind yourself that you were in fact naked right now, “I’m just looking.”

“Mmm, so am I.” Jungkook’s eyes trailing down your exposed body to your cunt, watching the white substance dripping out onto his skin, “If I weren’t already exhausted I’d already have you bent over again.” 

“Jungkook!” You whispered out, starting to feel embarrassed now, “Stop…please.” 

He let out a tired, boyish smile and staring down at him you couldn’t help but mirror it, he looked much younger like this, more like his age, eyes lidded from tiredness as his hands wrapped further, fingers digging into your ass, “Is it a crime to admire my wife? You’re only sitting on top of me naked.” 

“I’ve seen you shirtless many times now,” You decided to no longer entertain his dirty thoughts, slowly lowering yourself down his chest making his fingers squeeze tighter around your ass, “But i’ve never truly paid attention.”

“To my godly physique?”

This made you both quietly laugh as you shook your head, unable to not be endeared by this new playful side of him you had never seen, “How did you know?” You whispered back, a light tease in your voice as your hand traced over his sternum, “I meant the scars…How many battles did you fight in?” 

Jungkook palmed your ass in his hands, massaging the flesh as he yawned, eyes closing as he hummed potentially trying to recall, “Too many to count honestly, I was drafted before the Five Year War started as to be properly prepared.” 

Your fingers traced over each scar, some long and thin, others short and deeper, few discolored still having never properly healed, others faded and hardly visibly, “How’d you get this one?” Your finger’s stopped on his left right, a circular scar it was small, as if he had been pierced.

Jungkook’s eyes slowly lidded once more, following where your fingers pressed, “When we first rode to Rolon for war, an archer shot me right off my horse, my only saving grace from death was the wind otherwise it would’ve pierced my heart, y'know it’s said the Rolon Archer’s were trained since children, they could shoot a coin from over a hundred yards away.”

“You were injured before the battle had even begun?” You whispered out, perhaps a little amused at his story. 

Jungkook’s hand trailed down the back of your thigh, pulling them apart just a little making your hips brush over his skin, the feeling of wet stickiness rubbing over his skin, “It was my first endeavor by myself, my men were counting on me to lead them, you can imagine it was a pretty pathetic sight.”

“So how did you manage to siege them if you could not get close?” You tilted your head, resting your elbows down his chest, your hips appeasing him as you softly grinded down on his pubic bone. 

“We had all camped outside their outer districts, preparing ourselves,” Jungkook let out a pleasured hum, eyes closed once more and fingers trailing back to your ass before settling at your steady, soft movement, “We could not get close to their borders without them shooting us down by the tens if not hundreds. And so we would have to make ourselves unknown, invisible.”

A quiet moan escaped him at the feeling of your hips pulling just a little further down just above where his cock was beginning to stir despite his own lethargy. 

“Invisible?” Tiredness was beginning to pull at your lids but you enjoyed this too much, the conversation, the feeling of your puffy, cum covered slit grinding against him, making him break focus, “Surely that wouldn’t be possible?” 

“Invisible to the faraway eye that is,” Jungkook’s brows pinched, fingers gripping your ass a little tighter as your hips dragged just along the base of his hardening cock, weepy and sensitive from having already came inside you twice this night, “Mmm, I didn’t think you’d be such a little lust driven succubus once we consummated.”

It made you grind him just a little harder, the feeling of his cock bobbing before it smacked against your cunt, fully hardened and precum smearing against your asscheek. 

“I’m trying to have a conversation,” You teased, hands traveling over the expanse of his chest before your fingers found his dark nipples, curiously you pinched them a little, “You’re the one that’s making it sexual.” 

A restrained moan escaped him as his eyes cracked open, you couldn’t help your curiosity, fascinated at his different reactions to different things, after all, you were learning his body just as much as he was learning of yours. 

“Sex is dripping off of you,” Jungkook sighed, feeling your hips tease his cock once more, puffy slit rubbing down it’s base before back to his pubic bone, “I can’t help the way my body reacts to it, climbing on top of me naked isn’t a productive way to have a conversation.” 

You couldn’t help but close your eyes briefly, relishing in the feeling of his heady, heavy cock dragging through your puffy slit, coating it in a mixture of your wetness and cum. 

Feeling his shaft rubbing into your sensitive clit was you let out a soft moan, “You didn’t continue your story. How were you invisible.” Your hips dragged back to his pubic bone, pausing your movement to try and refocus your conversation. 

Jungkook let out a displeased sound, fingers digging against your ass once more, “If you want to hear my stories, keep entertaining me.” 

“Can you stay focused?” You gave him a mischievous smile, slowly pulling back up to your elbows, his eyes immediately on your tits. 

“As long as you don’t make me cum,” Jungkook retorted right back, a cocky grin on his face, “Well?” You tried not to shy away from his expression as your hips slowly began rubbing on him once more, teasing the base of his cock as he let out a soft pleasured moan, eyes slowly closing once more to enjoy the feeling as he recalled, “I proposed to my men that we would camouflage ourselves with the terrain, we covered ourselves in mud and moss, whatever greenery we could and crawled on the earth to evade their eyes.” 

His fingers dragged down to the back of your thighs once more as your hips dragged a little lower down his shaft as your clit throbbed making a soft moan escape you, “That’s how you managed to siege their capitol Montclair?”

His fingers pulled your thighs apart, opening your slit a little more as it rubbed along is shaft back to his base, “Mmhm, like that,” He whispered out at feeling your hips pause at the base of his cock, wiggling a little to push it further between the lips of your cunt. 

Silence had suddenly taken over as your eyes shut, enjoying being able to pleasure your husband as your hips slowly rode the base of his cock, letting it slip against your lips and rub along your clit.

This type of pleasure was slow, tantalizing, making his hips rut a little, gliding with ease against your soaked cunt, “What about this one.” Your fingers briefly brushed along his left breast, a long wicked line crossing it as you slowed your hips back down. 

“Training accident when I was younger,” Jungkook murmured out, sounding half asleep, “I had assumed Hoseok was going for a lower strike but he tricked me, he got too close and accidentally sliced me right across the chest, it was a larger wound when it had first happened.” 

Jungkook had a faint smile on his lips as his hands dragged to your waist, keeping a firm grip to encourage your hips, his eyes pulled open only a little, “He wouldn’t stop crying while profusely apologizing to me, saying he’d do anything to keep the wrath from my father at bay.” 

“Did he hear about it?” Your moan was mixed with your soft laugh, grinding down as your clit dragged against his skin.

Jungkook’s breath hitched, “No, it only went as far as my aunt. She merely laughed it off, saying it was good practice for the real deal.”

You paused your movement, hands tracing down his particularly slim waist, just at the bottom of his ribcage, “And this?”

You lifted yourself up as Jungkook opened his eyes, “No looking.” You whispered out. 

This made him confused before he let out a quiet laugh, closing his eyes once more, “I’ve seen it already princess, you can’t hide anything from me at this point.”

“I’m…testing…it’s lewd.” You tried not to be embarrassed as you sat down on his taunt, thick muscular thighs, legs still parted as you situated your cunt against his base once more, “How did you get that scar?” You prompted him once more. 

Jungkook seemed to be having an increasingly harder time focusing as he felt it, your cunt making contact with the sensitive underside of his cock, your hips lifting to drag against his shaft, “It was when we attempted war with Kyoto, I was in the frontlines with the other underlings and an assassin of Kyoto had made his way into the trenches.”

Jungkook’s jaw was clenched as he felt your hand wrap around the head of his cock, giving short as he let out a breathy moan, hand running through his hair, “He was a full grown man and we were nothing more than boys pretending to be men. His sword longer than us all,” He bit down on his lip at your hand squeezing his cock, your cunt sliding against his base, “He cut two of the other underlings in half with just one swing, I was almost the third, I had barely managed to jump back in time but the tip of his blade still cut through me, blood was everywhere.”

“How did you live?” You whispered out, sadness somewhere deep inside you filled your heart through the haze of lust. 

“Jimin had managed to jump on his back,” Jungkook let out another breath moan at feeling your hand drag down his cock, “Stabbed him in the neck, he choked on his own blood as they all rushed to get first aid for me. I almost bled out that night but by some miracle they had managed to stop the bleeding and get me stitches.” 

Jungkook groaned as his hands curled into fists, pleasure becoming much stronger than it was supposed to, “Enough please.” 

The movements ceased, “Does it not feel good?” 

“It feels too good, I told you to not make me cum.” Jungkook sighed softly in relief as he felt you change positions back to your original, the weight of your body situated once more fully on top of him, “Mmm warm my cock.”

“I don’t understand how that works.” You whispered out, a bit embarrassed, you were a fast learner but you still didn’t know all the ends and outs of how all of this worked. 

This made Jungkook laugh softly, endeared at your words as he forced his tired eyes back open, “It’s simple honestly, sit on my cock, let it stay warm inside you. I’ll be able to focus and recall events more better that way.”

“Really?” You replied skeptically.

“Mhm, what else do you want to know?” Jungkook let a crooked smirk tug on his lips as you grabbed the base of his cock, obediently doing as he told you, the fat head pushing inside you, a noise escaping you both. 

Slowly you slid down his cock until your hips were flush with his, “Mmm, what now?” It was hard to focus now having him stuffing you so full. 

Jungkook let out a long content sigh, “Nothing, this is it. Ask away.”

His hands lovingly stroked your hips as you suddenly struggled to speak, feeling his fat large cock throbbing inside you, walls clenching around him as your arousal dripped.

Jungkook let out an amused breath, “Cat got your tongue?”

You shook your head, slowly leaning back down to rest yourself on his chest, but somehow laying made your body feel even more full, “This one?” Your words were soft, trembled with a quiet whine, fingers brushing over his right bicep, a thin long line curving around it. 

Jungkook’s hands stroked your waist before trailing over your back, “It happened during our siege of Prokiev, the battle happened overnight and it was dark out, fire my only source for my fight with their royal guard captain, our adrenaline was running out and we were both ragged, he threw a sloppy blow aiming for my chest but I moved away and back, the edge of his blade managed to pierce right through my chainmail. It wasn’t a serious injury.”

Jungkook let out a soft pleasured sigh at your little walls clenching around him, seemingly unable to relax with him buried this deep and unmoving in your cunt, “It serves as a reminder though.”

“To what?” You whispered out, setting your head down on his chest, biting down on your lip once more, trying so, so hard to focus on his words and not his cock, it felt like he was completely stretching you out, hitting all the way up into your stomach though surely that wasn’t possible. 

Even if it felt like it was. 

“That many want me dead, sharpening their blades that even a shallow cut could one day maim me or better yet kill me. Sometimes I wonder how I survived,” Jungkook murmured, eyes closing as he fought the sleep off, “Each of these scars is proof that I’m still here, that somehow despite all of the odds, whether it was pure luck, or pure skill, I lived another day. Learned, grew from my mistakes.”

Your eyes had fallen shut, tiredness pulling you into a lull as you felt a blanket being pulled over you, engulfing you in warmth once more. 

You let out a ghost of a whine at feeling the slightest rut of his hips, cock making sure it was buried as far inside you as possible, Jungkook pressed a kiss against your head, “Something above let me live, let me marry you, the love of my life.” 

Your eyes had become heavier with each passing gentle press of his lips, you had soon fallen asleep to the sweet sensation of his lips feathering your skin, hands stroking your side, cock keeping you full and ushers of love on his lips. 

While the journey had been safe and overall good travel, to say you were relieved to be in Kimhae was an understatement, the air was cold, but it didn’t have that wet sharp feeling it did in Penumbra, and only a bit of frost covered the ground now.

Your thickest layers were shedded during travel as it got warmer much to your relief, more than anything you were ready to see your family, and even more so ready to sleep in a proper bed and rest.

You couldn’t voice it aloud to anyone but your thighs were sore from not only riding your horse but also from other nefarious activities late into the night, you were absolutely ready to stand on your own two feet for the next week. 

Upon entering the gates of Kimhae the sight was familiar enough to you, elegant towering buildings, busy towns people who all seemed to pause from their business at the sight of not just you but your husband, whispers broke out and if your life in Penumbra had helped you with one thing, it was being able to ignore the stares.

Riding next to your husband as you made your way through the capitol until you arrived at the large gates of the palace, the courtyard open and lush, what you hadn’t expected was the sight of someone so familiar and yet…now had become a total stranger to you. 

Kim Seokjin, the man you had once thought was the love of your life, only to realize that this was a feeble, childish type of love, the type of love you think is love until you truly fall in love. 

He stood tall and proud as his eyes locked onto your figure, standing in white double buttoned vest and long sleeve, royal blue cape cascading behind him dramatically. 

He looked like something out of a fairytale and you couldn’t deny Seokjin was just as handsome as you remembered, clean cut and warm skin. 

Coming to a stop, your vision of him was somewhat blocked by your husband, and for the first time seeing them almost side by side made you realize just how different they were, Jungkook dawned in all black, hair array from travel and longer then when you had first met, well overdue for a trim. 

His look, all too familiar, neutral but often coming across as dark and brooding to a person who wasn’t well acquainted with him.

And you supposed you must have seemed different from your old self as well, you no longer wore flowery apparel light apparel, now often dawned in black and maroons, today no different though you had gone without the fuss and feathers to make travel easier, a plain black gown with an under layer of red peeping out, sleeves dramatically long but slits having formed to make movement easier, another white long sleeve layer beneath to keep you warm as well as curl up to your neck.

Jungkook had already dismounted his horse, holding his hands out to you as you stood up in your saddle, pulling your leg over before you felt the security of his hands wrap around your waist, lifting you down safely. 

You offer him a tiny smile of thanks as you turn to face Seokjin, the hand staying curled around your waist however did not go unnoticed by you as you both walked to greet your ex-lover. 

“Seokjin, I cannot thank you enough for your invitation,” You gave him a soft smile, perhaps a sort of soft spot for him still lingered in your chest, after all, while your love might not have been deep, it was something, and you’d take it for what it was, “It’s been a long time.” 

“Yes, I’m relieved to see you alive and well, it’s been too long.” Seokjin’s eyes were locked onto you and only you, and briefly you felt a sort of severed connection. 

His eyes drilling into you with a sort of passion that you only blinked at with a friendly polite smile, him taking your hand into his own as he lifted it to his lips, “Truthfully I don’t think enough time has passed.” 

Your hand was suddenly snatched away by a much larger one, Jungkook’s expression had quickly gone from neutral to one hundred percent leering and unfriendly, that typical icy Jeon glare as he spoke coldly, “Kim Seokjin.”

Seokjin’s eyes burned into the sight, Jungkook’s hand holding onto your own in a sort of protective manner, as if he assumed the man’s kiss to your hand would maim you.

“Jeon Jungkook.” Seokjin’s eyes twisted into a glare, but it simply didn’t have the same bite as Jungkook’s, “I can’t say I remember inviting the Jeon’s.”

“Interesting you say that,” Jungkook replied, a haughty cold look on his face, “Given one found its way to my wife,” He glanced down at you, a squeeze of his hand on your waist and his hand releasing your own only for his fingers to trace your jawbone, “Only the most beautiful Jeon.”

Jungkook’s thumb tugged at your lower lip and you couldn’t help but shy away from his gaze, somewhat flustered at such an open display of affection, “What my husband means to say is we’ve come here to represent Penumbra together, I hope this will be the first of many Yule’s we can all come together and celebrate the Rite of Peace.” 

You could tell by Seokjin’s gritted smile that whatever he had anticipated this was not it, it softened however as his eyes landed on you, “For you, I’d do anything Y/n.” His gaze became more sharp as they locked back onto Jungkook, “...And I suppose that goes for you as well. I hope your stay in Kimhae treats you well.”

“As do I.” Jungkook retorted, “Now if you’ll excuse us, we’d like to rest after our journey.”

You briefly glanced up at Jungkook, brow furrowing in a little bit of annoyance, you understood that Jungkook absolutely did not like Seokjin in the least, but couldn’t he be a little more discreet about it? 

This being your first public appearance as a couple meant you’d have to be careful how you presented yourselves, if he wanted to quarrel with the man you did not care as long as he did it in private where prying eyes and ears couldn’t witness it.

“Of course,” Seokjin almost sneered at him, making you shuffle a bit uncomfortable at seeing the men nearly bearing teeth at one another, “My head maid will show you to your room.” 

Seokjin gave you one last look, and you couldn’t quite describe it, it was one of yearning and longing, and yet it wasn’t reciprocated as you allowed Jungkook to lead you both into the palace following behind the maid. 

“What was all of that about?” You whispered reprimanding to Jungkook. 

Jungkook only looked ahead, “He touched you.” 

“...He was being polite.” You reasoned, you had never seen such displays from Jungkook before- well aside from the time Claudin had taken your hand. 

Come to think of it, you supposed this was less rash then when he pressed a knife into Claudin’s neck for so much as grabbing your hand to kiss, truthfully you should be thankful it didn’t escalate so quickly to that. 

Stepping into your guest room you paused, realizing this was the room you used to stay in when you were a maiden...Seokjin probably still has the route memorized…had he thought you’d come to Kimhae alone?

You shook the ridiculous notion away as you took your cloak off, Jungkook shut the door to your shared room, “He touched you.” He emphasized it. 

You turned around, raising your eyebrows, not understanding what he was getting at, Jungkook huffed, “Men who touch women like that aren’t being friendly.” 

“It was my hand!” You pouted, “You’ve touched my hands plenty of times.”

“And look where it led.” Jungkook countered as he took his own outer apparel off, “That’s just the way it goes. And perhaps because I also know you’ve sucked his cock-”

“Jungkook!” You cried out, embarrassment flooding through you, “Don’t say it so loud!” 

This made Jungkook chuckle as he sat on the foot of the bed, “Hmm, you’ve never sucked my cock before come to think of it.” He laughed even louder at suddenly being hit with the cloak you launched at him.

“I am tired and taking a nap, you can either join me or sleep on the floor if you keep being crude.” You kicked your riding shoes off as you pulled the covers curling up in bed, his body immediately beside you, arms wrapping around your waist. 

“I can’t help it,” Jungkook replied, snickering into your shoulder, “You’re easy to tease.” 

#wicked

[ittomi]

Moonstruck (14)

Werewolf & Vampire Hybrid!AU, Supernatural!AU | Hybrid!Jungkook x Hybrid!Reader | Werewolf!Taehyung x Hybrid!Reader (ft. BTS)

genre: angst, e2l, supernatural, thriller, slow burn

rating: mature

description: Ari wants to see who truly loves you by pitting your lovers against each other.

word count: 6.3k

warnings: contains SPOILERS!!! kidnapping, cussing, fight scenes, betrayals, blood, dark magic, attempted assault, (temporary) deaths, 

a/n: The series is almost over! Just one chapter and I hope you’re enjoying reading as much as I am writing. Hope to hear your thoughts. Thanks for sticking around so long and giving my series a chance. <333 It's also on AO3 if you prefer reading over there!

Moonstruck Series Masterlist

“It’s a pity our own granddaughter has to die,” a gentle voice said. 

Your eyes slowly opened, revealing the old couple from before. An immediate realization dawned upon you as you noticed the chains, bounding you in the shape of an X to the cold stone wall. These were no ordinary chains—every wriggle, every struggle, intensified the pain. Wolfsbane and vervain were laced into the links, sending stinging sensations to your wrists and ankles. Your body felt groggy, so it was certain you were injected with something beforehand.

Last thing you recalled was falling into the frozen lake. The freezing water filling up your lungs… oh right. Jimin had killed you too. Just your luck.

Looking around, it was evident this wasn’t the lake. But it wasn’t the underground cellar or cave in the mountains. Where exactly were you?

“Don’t get soft on her now. She’s awake,” a gruff voice responded. 

“Granddaughter?” The question hung in the air, escaping your lips in a hushed whisper. Another whiff of your mother’s familiar perfume triggered a sudden realization. “You’re…” 

“Your grandparents? Yes, dear. It’s sad we had to meet this way, but we had to make sure you died once these stupid 100 days were over,” your grandfather replied. “Frankly, we should take matters into our own hands.”

“We can’t. We don’t have the stake and that witch girl is frightening. They’ll kill her at the end of the day anyway,” your grandmother assured. “Besides, it’s nice not having to get our hands dirty.”

“100 days?” you breathed, unable to form a coherent sentence. It was difficult battling the drowsy state forced on you.

“God, she sounds delirious. Yes. Because you sired that other abomination and Jimin and that Ari girl are so insistent in breaking that bond first before killing you.”

“Honestly, it doesn’t matter,” your grandfather retorted with his arms crossed. “As long as you’re dead in the end, all the hybrids you’ve sired will cease to exist too.”

The weight of this revelation jolted you out of your drowsy trance, and you shot them an alarmed glare.

“What did you say?”

“Oh? You didn’t know? When you create those repulsive hybrids and sire them, you form a sireline. It’s like a family tree that never goes away. So if you die, then all the non-Original hybrids you created will die too. Even if the sire bond is broken.”

“Is that true?”

"We didn't dedicate our lives to learning everything about you just to lie now."

"Then... does Jimin know about this? He'd never let Jungkook die," you questioned, sensing the answer in the subtle withdrawal of their body language.

“Of course he doesn’t know. He’s too hellbent on killing you to realize he’s gonna kill his lover too,” your grandmother sneered. She approached you and bent down eye-level, analyzing your features carefully. “Remarkable. You look just like your mother.”

You spat in her face and she wiped it away immediately, taking a few steps back. She chuckled at your feisty behavior, a dark amusement in her eyes.

“Mom will never forgive you for doing this!” you exclaimed.

“Do you think we care? We disowned her when she eloped. Who would’ve thought she was pregnant with you…”

“You’re my family. Why does it matter so damn much to you?” you asked, your voice teetering between anger and disappointment.

“Blame your mother and father. They were never supposed to fall in love, much less have a child. Your existence is a loop in Mother Nature and unnatural!” your grandpa exclaimed. “It took us an eternity to track you down. Imagine our surprise when Jung Dawon showed up to the hospital where we worked.”

You held your breath. “She was your patient?”

“I think her name is Jiwoo now, honey,” your grandma reminded with a pat on her husband’s shoulder.

“Ah, right, right. What would I do without you?”

The two of them started to snuggle their noses together, their display of affection making you want to vomit. 

“Hey! Don’t ignore me! You two treated Jiwoo during her coma?!” you asked.

“Yes. That’s how we crossed paths with Jimin, H.O.P.E.—shame they’ve disbanded now thanks to your professors, no doubt. And then the Jungs had to die or Jimin wouldn’t have upheld his deal in the bargain,” your grandmother informed.

“You killed Hoseok’s parents… You deserve hell.” A past memory suddenly resurfaced to the forefront of your mind. “Years ago, Dad said you reached out. Said you apologized and wanted to meet me. Was that all a lie?”

Her gaze met yours, an expression of feigned pity playing on her face as she nodded, and your grandfather, reveling in your naivety, let out a cynical chuckle.

“You’re lucky your mother was so stubborn and unwilling to meet us. She even went so far as to make you move homes time and time again. It’s like she knew we had cruel intentions,” the old woman remarked.

“Cruel? Is that what you call it? This is diabolical, I deserve to live just as much as you do! You call my existence unnatural, which is hypocritical considering none of us are human!”

“She talks too much,” the old man interjected.

“Yeah, let’s shut her up.”

“No, no! I’m going to reveal everything! You won’t get away with—”

It was futile. Your grandmother held your head still while your grandfather retrieved a ball gag from a nearby table. Your nose picked up wafts of vervain and wolfsbane, causing you to whimper. As the straps secured around your face, your skin ignited with pain, and you couldn't contain the sobs that escaped.

Your relatives walked away from you once the task was complete, heading for the stairs. The last words you heard were from your grandmother.

“It was a pleasure meeting you, darling.”

Meanwhile, back at the dimly lit cellar…

Cage 1: Jungkook, Taehyung, Sunghyun

In the first cage, Jungkook stood tall, his back against the bars. Taehyung was standing on the opposite side, muscles tense, while Sunghyun minded his business and rested on the cot in the middle of the two. 

Cage 2: Namjoon and Yoongi

In the adjacent cage, Namjoon lay unconscious, sprawled on the cold floor. Yoongi sat with his back against the cage, observing their surroundings with a calculating gaze.

Cage 3: Jin, Hoseok, Jiwoo

The third cage housed Jin, who gazed through the bars with a mix of determination and worry. Hoseok stood tall with his sister Jiwoo sitting beside him, a protective arm wrapped around her. 

No one dared to utter a word. Each person bore the weight of their own struggles in the metallic confines, the atmosphere oppressive and thick with tension. The silence broke when Taehyung got down on all fours.

“What are you doing?” Jungkook questioned.

“I’m getting out of here. [Y/N]’s in danger.” He closed his eyes, narrowing his focus while using his werewolf instincts.

“Turning won’t work. These cages were built to withstand supernaturals,” Jungkook recalled, his arms crossed in a display of frustration. Taehyung, irritated by the diversion of his focus, furrowed his eyebrows and then opened his eyes. 

“Well, it worked for Hoseok. Didn’t it?” he declared as he stood up, hands planted firmly on his hips.

“I was set up by you and Jimin! You tainted my food!” Hoseok argued. 

“Are you sure it wasn’t your lover over there?” Taehyung smirked, his words a venomous tease.

“Go to hell, Taehyung!” Yoongi exclaimed.

Chaos reigned as accusations flew, each member of the imprisoned group hurling blame and calling out their short-comings. Only did the sound of the creaking cellar door garnered their attention. The unexpected arrival turned out to be Ari, who was descending down the staircase in a frantic scramble. 

“Oh my god, what have I done? You all have to get out of here!”

A collective confusion lingered, yet none dared to question Ari's sudden change of heart. Retrieving the keys from her pocket, she approached the nearest cage—Taehyung's. Nervousness interfered with her attempt to unlock the padlock properly.

“Come on, Ari!” Taehyung yelled.

“I’m trying here!” 

In an unexpected twist, Ari fell to her knees, clutching her chest and breathing heavily. She let out a pained groan, followed by an unsettling expulsion of water. “Oh… that can’t be good.”

“What the hell is happening to you?” Professor Jin asked, gripping the cage bars for a closer look. “The dark magic is killing you!”

“It’s not that. Jimin’s trapped in the frozen lake. He’s drowning and dying over and over.” Struggling to stand, Ari's focus remained on the stubborn padlock. “I’m running out of time. She’s going to come back soon.”

Moments later, the padlock clicked open. She swung the cage door open, urging the boys to escape.

“Where do you think you’re going?” A dark, menacing voice emanated from Ari's lips, her face contorting as if an evil force sought to break free.

"Let them go!" The familiar, authoritative tone sounded like the Ari they knew, yet beneath the surface, a fierce battle between the light and darkness waged.

“No. You’re too weak to stop me!” 

Ari threw up some more water as she collapsed to the floor with a thud. She reached her hand out to the boys and whispered. “Run…”

Her hand dropped and she was unconscious. The shock of it all left everyone frozen when her eyes suddenly fluttered open, pitch black, and she scrambled to her feet at lightning speed. 

Taehyung, Jungkook, and Sunghyun rushed upstairs but it was too late. Ari used dark magic to telekinetically rip out Sunghyun’s heart, permanently killing him. His remaining corpse fell down stairs as Jiwoo shrieked. Hoseok shielded his sister away from the sight in a tight embrace, trying his best to calm her down.

“Now… you two. Don’t worry, I won’t kill you. We still have to go talk to your beloved [Y/N].”

She knocked them out with the snap of her fingers before teleporting them to your location.

You gave into exhaustion and surrendered to a nap for however long possible. Nothing mattered anymore. You were trapped and because of your reckless plan, so was everyone else. Your grandparents wanted you dead and at this point, you yearned for an end. 

What stirred you from your slumber was the sound of groaning. You slowly opened your eyes and saw Taehyung and Jungkook lying on their stomachs a few feet away. They were chained to the floor like animals. 

Jungkook was first to fully regain his senses, sitting up right away at the sight of you. “[Y/N]! You’re alive—oh fuck. What did they do to you?”

The ball gag and restraints didn’t aid in your efforts to communicate as the only sounds you could make were whimpers. Taehyung, driven by desperation, got on his knees and tugged at his chains madly.

“Don’t worry, I’ll get you out. It’ll be okay!”

In the heart of the room, Ari manifested from the ceiling and floated down like an angel. A dark one, that is.  

“What is it about you, hmm? You have not only one but TWO suitors who are willing to do whatever it takes to save you. To love you. Meanwhile, I can’t even have one…”

She landed gently on the ground as she circled around Jungkook, eyes locked into yours. “You said Jimin never loved me, but what about you? Do you really think Jungkook loves you? He admitted feelings for another.”

You bit your lip to fight back tears. This was too painful to deal with.

“[Y/N], don’t listen to her. Listen to me,” Jungkook begged. The sadness within your gaze caused a pang in his heart. “This is the truth. There were times I spent the night at his dorm because I couldn’t stand watching you with Taehyung. I got to bond with him on a deeper level. He was the first friend I had outside of you that didn’t judge me. Didn’t make me feel like a loser. Like I was weak.”

“So you kiss him,” Taehyung remarked. “A little heart-to-heart and you’re all tongues.”

“He kissed me!” Jungkook snapped at him. He refocused on you. “During the sparring session. I was trying to get information out of him. Promise! Of course I felt something; it was a kiss. It surprised me. But that doesn’t mean he’s the one I love.”

“Excuses, excuses,” the werewolf said with a dismissive hand gesture. 

“You don’t get to judge something you don’t understand. The sire bond affects emotions and it’s almost broken. I’ve been living my life through a filter! I don’t know what’s what anymore.”

“It doesn’t matter. You didn’t believe her when it mattered most. Nothing’s worse than not being believed. She must’ve been crushed.”

Taehyung’s right. You were.

“You watch your mouth!”

“Or what? We’re all chained because that bitch of a witch can’t stand the fact her boyfriend is in love with you! This is all your fault!”

Ari cackled and rushed over to Taehyung’s side like a devil whispering in his ear. “That’s right. Rile him up.”

“Get the hell away from me,” Taehyung huffed in disgust. “You killed Sunghyun.”

Your eyes widened, devastated at this information. Professor Jin was right. The Ari you knew was long gone; she would never murder someone in cold blood. 

Your ex-best friend paced back and forth and then shrugged. “Oh, please. You don’t care about him.”

“Yeah, but I don’t want you near me.”

She rolled her eyes. “You’re lucky you’re not dead. Sunghyun was asking for it by trying to escape. And he showed Jungkook my journal.”

Jungkook’s ears perked up at this. Ari smirked and continued, “Yeah. I know about it. My old self had a tendency to jot everything down and then spelled her drawers, so I wouldn’t be able to see it. That is, until you and Sunghyun used his amulet to bypass it. Thanks for that.”

She snapped her fingers and the journal in question appeared in her hands. She flipped it open and hummed in amusement. 

“Hmm… wow, I really did not hold back. Lots of juicy information in here. But,” she closed the book, “she didn’t write everything down. You really want to know the truth, Jungkook? The whole truth?”

“What is your end goal, huh? Where’s Jimin?” Jungkook questioned. Ari replied with nothing but a smirk. 

“Wouldn’t you like to know?”

“Let me talk to him. I can stop all of this. He can have me as long as he lets [Y/N] go.”

Ari grabbed his neck in a chokehold and he wheezed, powerless against her unexpected strength. “You really are stupid, aren’t you? Jimin is mine and mine only. There was a time when I’d share him, but not anymore.”

She released him with a fierce anger, and he coughed, struggling to regain composure on all fours.

“Turn,” she commanded and Jungkook snapped his neck up to look at her. 

“What?”

“It’s the last day of the sire bond. You have to turn one more time, right? So do it.”

“You’re delusional. I’m not doing anything you say.”

“Come on. Amuse me. You might be able to save your precious [Y/N] by turning.”

“No.”

Ari fumed at his response, kicking him in the stomach and forcing him to fall on his back. She stomped on him multiple times, your muffled screams rendered useless. The air was charged with tension as Ari spoke, her voice tinged with frustration and jealousy.

"Do you have any idea how infuriating it is, Jungkook? Watching you and her, with your damned sire bond, risking everything for each other. It's sickening!"

Jungkook grabbed her foot to stop her from crushing his ribs any further. “Ari… this bond is beyond our control. It’s not something we asked for.”

Ari scoffed at his response. “So why won’t you turn? End it. End this stupid connection you have with her. Show everyone your love was conditional, a hoax!”

She left his aching body and went up to you, a clawed hand in front of your face with a malevolent black glow. 

“Turn or I’ll kill her,” she threatened, the White Oak Stake presenting herself in her grasp. Panic gripped you at the sight of the weapon. “That’s right, bestie. This is the one and only stake that can kill an original hybrid.”

“Don’t lay a finger on her!” Taehyung roared. She turned around, tapping the stake against her palm in a rhythmic cadence, reminiscent of a stern ruler used for chastising children in the past.

“Ah, yes. The other lover is vying for your affection. God, you just can’t catch a break with these two!”

“This doesn’t have to end this way. We both want the same thing. I’ll talk to Jimin, we’ll figure something out. As long as Jungkook is out of the picture, it’ll be worth it! We can still be a team.”

“Team?” Jungkook questioned. 

“We?” She let out a chuckle. “There is no ‘we.’ You and Jimin have dictated everything from the start. He strung me along like a fool. All I wanted was his love. I was willing to risk it all only for him to want someone else and cast me aside entirely!”

She faced Jungkook. “My journal revealed all of Jimin’s plans, but not Taehyung’s. I think you’ll find this interesting.”

Taehyung's gaze narrowed, a subtle intensity flickering in his eyes as he shook his head slowly.

“You’re making a big mistake.”

“Where do I start? Oh. Taehyung is the one that ordered H.O.P.E to attack you that dreaded day. You know, the day that started it all.”

Ari reveled in the chaos she had orchestrated, the atmosphere thick with tension and despair. Jungkook's eyes burned with fury as he faced Taehyung, betrayal and anger intertwining in the lines of his furrowed brow.

“You planned this? The attack, the kidnapping?”

Taehyung, unapologetic, met Jungkook's accusatory gaze with a stoic expression.

“[Y/N] could’ve died! We all could’ve!” Jungkook exclaimed. 

“The plan was only for you to die. That way [Y/N] would find comfort in me and only me. But then you survived. Stupid sire bond.”

“Oh yeah, the whole scavenger hunt thing was also Taehyung’s idea. Jimin pretended to be a hunter to kidnap [Y/N],” Ari added. Jungkook’s confusion was blatant.

“What on earth could that possibly accomplish for you, Tae?”

The werewolf shrugged, reluctant to answer. Ari, the puppeteer of chaos, was more than willing. 

“He was betting on [Y/N] saving him with her blood. Then he was going to kill himself to become sired to her like you.”

“You crazy bastard!” Jungkook roared, chains rattling as he attempted to pounce on Taehyung but couldn’t. “All of this pain and suffering, all for some twisted desire to be bound to her?" This isn’t love, it’s obsession! You don’t deserve her!”

Taehyung held his ground. “And you do? I actually want to be bound to her for life. All you’ve ever done was taken her for granted! Just turn already!”

“If I do turn, it’s to rip you to shreds!”

“Yes~, yes~!” Ari cried. “Indulge in your anger! Let the beast out!”

She ripped his clothing off with no remorse, leaving him in nothing but his boxers. Seeing him stripped against his will left him vulnerable and the humiliation almost killed him. He punched the ground, the concrete pulverized into tiny pieces and his knuckles bloody. 

Clapping eagerly, Ari urged for him to turn. You hated seeing him in such a vulnerable state. When your gazes met, there was nothing but shame and heartbreak. You didn’t know what to expect once the 100th day arrived, but this definitely was not it.

“Maybe one isn’t enough,” Ari remarked, striding over to Taehyung’s side and tearing his clothes to shreds. “You turn too. Fight each other. You want Jungkook dead and [Y/N] all for yourself, right?”

“Fuck you, I’m not some pawn for you to toy with!”

“Aw, come on. I’m actually helping you out here. I know tonight’s not a full moon, so it’ll hurt like a bitch. But don’t you want [Y/N] to see how sexy it is for you to turn anyway? You said you love her.”

She sauntered back over to you, the White Oak Stake dangerously close to your chest. 

“Either you guys turn and battle each other or this goes through her heart.”

She casted a spell and had the stake hovering in front of your chest and the boys roared with anger, but had no choice. The air thickened with an impending sense of dread. You, restrained and unable to look away, watched as Taehyung and Jungkook grappled with the impending transformation, a painful struggle that unfolded before your eyes.

The first tremors wracked Taehyung's form as his body contorted with the agony of shifting. Bones cracked and muscles rippled beneath his skin, the visceral sounds of transformation echoing in the confined space. His anguished groans reverberated through the cold, unforgiving walls. Without a full moon, this process was far more difficult to go through, but he persevered thanks to the emotional intensity of his love for you.

Beside him, Jungkook's transformation mirrored Taehyung's torment. The once-human features distorted, replaced by the primal visage of a werewolf emerging from the depths within. Claws unsheathed and black fur sprouted, a physical manifestation of the feral power coursing through him.

You’ve watched countless transformations over the years, but none were as painful as this one. It was as if your heart was being incinerated, the connection between you and Jungkook severed. A part of you cherished the pain because it’d be the last time you two would feel each other’s emotions. 

Ari watched with a sadistic smile, leaning close to your ear. 

“This is fun, isn’t it? Love versus obsession. Or maybe love and obsession are the same. They’re trying so hard to save your life.”

Your silence earned a “tsk” from her.

“Don’t feel like talking?” she taunted. “Well get this. Remember how my grandmother was the one who taught me magic? She visits me in my dreams sometimes. Do you want to know what she told me?”

Jungkook and Taehyung’s combined screams of agony made it difficult to focus on her voice, but she leaned in even closer, whispering ever so softly.

“My grandma delved into dark magic once. Your father made a deal with her. He paid her to make your mother fertile. With you.”

You couldn’t believe your ears. You clenched your fists in disbelief and whined, not wanting to hear more.

“That’s right. You were conceived with dark magic. You always told me it seemed like the universe was against you and now you know why. Darkness follows you wherever you go; you’re not meant to be happy. That’s how you were able to use my dark potions. That darkness lives inside you. And it’s your father’s fault.”

Tears welled up in your eyes before cascading down your face. She giggled at your suffering, adding salt to the gaping wound in your heart.

“It must hurt to know every single person in your life has betrayed you in some way. You have no one left.”

The transformations were nearing completion. Sounds of bones snapping and muscles contorting filled the basement, a symphony of agony that echoed the torment of Taehyung and Jungkook’s dual existence. Taehyung's body convulsed, his once-human features now obscured by the emerging gray fur, streaked with haunting shades of white. Jungkook's transformation mirrored the shadows, his form engulfed by inky blackness as he fought against the pain that laced every fiber of his being.

As the final moments of the agonizing metamorphosis approached, the chains binding them groaned under the strain, holding firm until the transformation reached its peak. 

“One more thing,” Ari whispered. “The stake has been spelled to kill Jungkook once he finishes transforming.”

“No!!!” you screamed, although muffled. “Jungkook stop!!!”

Jungkook, having more experience, finished his transformation before Taehyung’s. Ari turned to you with a wicked smile. 

“Enjoy the show, [Y/N].”

You watched in despair as the spelled stake launched through the air straight for Jungkook when Jimin emerged from the shadows, his silhouette cutting through the dim light. His eyes, determined and resolute, locked onto the impending threat aimed at Jungkook. He leaped in the way, the impact of the enchanted stake against Jimin's body resonated through the basement. 

His shoulder had been hit, but it was not a fatal wound. In the stunned silence that followed, Jimin's eyes met Jungkook's with an unspoken understanding. 

The next few minutes were a blur. Taehyung completed his transformation and was liberated from his chains seconds after Jungkook. Ari, relentless in her pursuit, launched another attack at Jungkook, but Jimin intercepted with a spell of his own. You squinted and recognized the blinding glow of Sunghyun’s amulet around his neck. 

The black wolf and Jimin united forces and the two of them battled Ari together. 

Meanwhile, Taehyung sprinted to you, using his teeth to pry the chains from your limbs. As the metal links fell away, you fell on top of the beast’s body. Using his agile speed,. Taehyung bolted out of the building as fast as possible, leaving Jungkook, Jimin, and Ari behind to hash things out.

You clung onto his back as he navigated through a common neighborhood with the veil of nighttime, your fingers tightly entangled in his fur. Though a bit groggy, you could feel whatever was in your system was wearing off gradually. It dawned on you that you were held captive in the Jung family’s old house, specifically the secret basement Professor Jin and Yoongi had uncovered months ago.

Taehyung kept running until he reached the secrecy of the woods. As he eased to a stop, you rolled off his back, laying on the forest floor and taking deep breaths. The wolf nudged your cheek with his nose, a comforting gesture, followed by a few licks to your face, as if to ease your worries. 

As much as you loved the notion, you couldn’t erase the truth of what he had done. You swiftly got to your feet and shook your head.

“Stop. I know what you’re doing.” He lowered his head and let out a whine. Human or wolf form, he had mastered the puppy dog eyes. He nuzzled his head against your side, desperate for solace, but you rejected him. “Taehyung, no!”

As you retreated, your foot came into contact with something, kicking it further backwards. Turning around, the moonlight revealed the mystery object buried in the snow. The sight pulled an involuntary scream from your lips, causing a startle strong enough to make you fall on the cold snow.

There laid your grandmother’s decapitated head and with little effort, you spotted your grandfather’s nearby.

Taehyung had reverted back to his human form and wrapped his arms around you in a protective embrace.

“Shhh, shh,” he cooed in his deep, soothing voice. “It’s okay.”

You pushed him hard enough that he fell onto the snow. “Did you do this?”

His eyes widened as he stared at you, shocked. “I’ve been spending the last few hours TRAPPED because of you. How the hell would I have time to do this?!”

You sat criss-cross, hands on your head in distress. “You’re right, I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”

He grunted, rising to his feet, and offered you his hand. You peered up, finally registering he was without clothing in the moonlight. The soft glow accentuated every chiseled feature of his handsome face, rendering you speechless. Staring at his hand, you contemplated taking it. 

“No,” you finally said, getting up by yourself. “I don’t even know why I’m apologizing. You brought the hunters here. You were working with Jimin. YOU wanted Jungkook dead.”

“I promise when I conspired with Jimin, he didn’t tell me he was going to kill you. He wanted to be with Jungkook and I wanted to be with you. Believe me, darling. I had no clue of his true intentions.”

You were sick of crying, but that was all you wanted to do. Angry tears were slowly dripping down your face as you used hand gestures to convey your frustration.

“I can’t just forget it all.”

Taehyung cupped your face with both hands, his eyes full of hope and desperation. “But what if you did? Let’s run away together. Start over and forget all this misery.”

“I can’t.”

“You can,” he murmured, placing a chaste kiss on your lips to seal his words. “You and me.”

He continued to kiss you despite your feeble pleas for him to stop. Your tone lacked conviction, perhaps due to exhaustion. Maybe you found a glimmer of belief in his words. Or maybe deep down, you craved his touch to momentarily replace your ache. 

The warmth of his lips, the weight of his breath, the hand on the small of your back—you melted for a fleeting moment. In the end, you had to force yourself to pull away.

“Tae—”

“Allow me to tell you my offer before you make a choice.” He placed his hands on your shoulders, staring deep into your eyes. “If you allow it, I will whisk you away to where you will only experience peace and be loved the way you deserve. In the daytime, I will be your loyal companion, a listening ear, anything your heart requires to feel at ease. Soft kisses, warm candlelight, watching your favorite show on repeat,” he said with a chuckle. Then his eyes darkened with lust. 

“Later deep into the night, I will be your source of release, making love to you for hours on end until you’re drowning in pleasure that humans wish they could experience. Passionate kisses, lingering touches, our sweaty bodies pressed together.”

He squeezed your shoulders with gentle pressure and brought you closer until your chests were touching.”

“I don’t want nobody else. You are all that matters. Not your fertility, not your history. Just you.”

Your resolve was crumbling. Taehyung knew all the right things to say and knew how to make you feel good. You wished things were different but at the moment, you wanted no one. You just wanted things to end.

“Tae… I can’t. I need… I need to be by myself. This is too much.”

“Too much?” Taehyung’s grip on your shoulders suddenly felt tighter. You didn’t even register how fast he pinned you down, hands held above your head. “Was it too much when I fucked you?“

“Stop! What are you doing?”

“Answer me!” He started to grind his cock against your thigh unashamed, the heavy pants causing chills to go down your spine. “Didn’t it feel good? Didn’t you enjoy it?”

He slipped a knee between your legs, pressing down hard enough to elicit a whimper from your lips. 

“Let me take you again. I’ll make sure you feel good.”

He placed searing kisses along your neck much to your dismay. You refused to lay still, squirming around to avoid contact, but you were still too weak to retaliate. 

“S-Stop,” you sobbed. 

He removed his hands from your own and grabbed onto the column of your throat, admiring your struggle. “You always did like it rough. So beautiful. So sexy…”

To your relief, he didn’t choke you but caressed your neck gently like it was the most beautiful thing in the world. Realizing his true intentions behind that action, you summoned every ounce of strength to act quickly. Planting your feet firmly on the ground, you arched your back, utilizing the leverage to break free from Taehyung's hold. In a swift, well-timed move, you twisted your body and managed to flip the situation.

Now he was the one pinned down and you swung at him once. Twice. Then once more to ensure he was unconscious. You let out screams of rage while doing so, hating everything he’s become.

When he no longer moved, you rose from the cold ground, your steps heavy in the snow. That was when he grabbed at your ankles, forcing you to stumble forward.

“There’s no reason to stand,” he said in a venomous tone, “I like you better on all fours.”

The sounds of your struggles entwined with his grunts as he scrambled to lay on top of you, clawing at your body with his greedy hands, not caring how he was shredding your clothes or how you were getting bloody scratches from his nails. He wrapped his arm around you in a secure chokehold and you began to lose vision.

“You sure pack a punch. I’ll bite.”

Taehyung’s eyes shifted to a fiery goldenrod as he bare his fangs, sinking them into the side of your neck harshly. You let out the most blood-curdling scream as crimson dripped down and tainted the snow. It was like the world stood still, the betrayal amplifying the unimaginable pain. 

He finally released you after he got his fill, making an obscene lip-smacking sound after having tasted you. 

“You know, you always look so much better when I mark you up. I always claim what’s mine, [Y/N]. And that includes y–”

A sudden blast of magical energy knocked Taehyung off your back and his body landed far away, rolling in the snow until it came into contact with a tree. You’d be sure to thank your savior if you made it out of this alive. All you desired was to fall into a deep slumber, hoping this was a simple nightmare. 

You felt someone’s hand rolling you onto your back and you saw the shiny amulet around his neck. 

“Jimin… what irony…”

“I’m not saving you,” he said, holding the White Oak Stake above you. Seems like he was going to end you for good. “I just needed him out of my way.”

You didn’t have it in you to explain why you deserved to live. Not even for Jungkook’s sake, considering your lives are linked. You closed your eyes and accepted your fate. Jimin watched you carefully, his hand trembling. He couldn’t do it. 

When he was drowning in the lake, the amulet fortunately collided with his body and ended up saving him. He then had an encounter with your grandparents, overhearing them talk about the sire line. He was left in the dark, hating that if he ended you, he’d lose Jungkook too. So he murdered them out of spite for hiding something so crucial.

And now, when his plans were so close to fruition, he just couldn’t risk it. Part of him hoped your grandparents were lying, but what good would that do them now? Their main objective had always been eradicating hybrids. The thought of them going after Jungkook never crossed his mind and he felt incredibly stupid.

You opened your eyes after some time had passed. Jimin was quick to notice, so he raised the stake up high, forcing himself to express determination to kill you. Underneath his facade, you could see the internal struggle raging within him.

“You can’t do it, can you?” you breathed. 

“Shut up!”

“You know about it. The sireline. That’s why you’re hesitating, isn’t it?” Your question reignited the conflict burning within him and he snapped, bringing the stake downwards with force, aiming towards your chest. 

However, your moonstone necklace blazed with intense light, stopping Jimin in his tracks. You couldn't help but notice the eerie similarity to the glow emanating from his amulet when they were in closer proximity. No matter how hard he pushed, the stake wouldn’t budge any further. 

That’s when Taehyung pounced onto Jimin, sinking his teeth into his neck. A struggle unfolded in the snow, but Jimin finally overthrew him. Blood spurted from Jimin’s neck and mouth as he fell to his knees and then collapsed completely. 

You stood up, mirroring Jimin by clutching the side of your neck as you walked toward him. There was no way he was going to survive a second werewolf bite. Not this time. 

Silence lingered between you and Jimin, an unspoken exchange of emotions, a complex tapestry of anger, sadness, and spite colliding with exhaustion, frustration, and burnout.

But the ordeal was far from over.

Taehyung ran over to you, shaking you by the shoulders. 

“Do you fear me? Do you hate me?” His eyes gleamed with madness, a wicked smile on his lips. “Nothing is going to stop us from being together. I want you to do it. Kill me!”

You were tortured by his existence and he knew it, exploiting it to his advantage. But if you ended him, that would be falling right into his twisted trap. With his blood in your system, he’d become a hybrid. 

“N-No.”

“Kill me, [Y/N]! I know you want to! Do it!” He roared, forcefully grabbing your hands and pressing them against his neck. “Strangle me! Rip my heart out!”

“You’re being crazy, stop!!!”

A snarl in the distance froze both of you. As Taehyung looked over his shoulder, a black wolf emerged, lunging at him. Taehyung was jovial in his struggle against the wolf, elated to have his wish granted.

“That’s right. Take your anger out on me. She doesn’t love you anymore! Your love was a sham!”

Jungkook growls intensified, clawing him to a gruesome death. You ran over as fast as you could, desperate to stop him.

“Jungkook no! Don’t do it! He bit me!”

As if your words reached him, Jungkook transformed back into his human form, staring at his blood-covered hands in horror. Seeing your neck wound, guilt consumed him, and he fainted.

"What have I done?" he whispered before collapsing. You caught him just in time.

"Jungkook? Jungkook, wake up!" You patted his face urgently. "No, no. What's going on?"

In the distance, you spotted someone crawling through the snow toward Jimin's dying body. Marching over, you grabbed Ari by the collar.

"Ari, what the hell is happening?! Fix it! You're a witch, you're strong. Do something!"

She shook her head. "I can't… I'm dying too. Jimin and I… we're linked."

“What?!”

“The night of the banquet when we took shots of alcohol… I spelled it to link our lives forever.”

“Oh my god… what about Jungkook? He’s not waking up!”

“Why do you think?” she said in a hoarse whisper. “He and Taehyung are linked too.”

#moonstruck

[ittomi]

Moonstruck (13)

Werewolf & Vampire Hybrid!AU, Supernatural!AU | Hybrid!Jungkook x Hybrid!Reader | Werewolf!Taehyung x Hybrid!Reader (ft. BTS)

genre: angst, e2l, supernatural, thriller, slow burn

rating: mature

description: A treacherous flashback unfolds. You orchestrate a plan to obtain the truth no matter the cost, ensnared in a web of betrayal and lies.

word count: 7.2k

warnings: contains SPOILERS! contains SPOILERS! Cussing, fire, battle scenes, weapons, blood/wounds (nothing too graphic), betrayals, compulsion, drowning, dark magic

a/n: It’s winter break for me so YES, I was working on this as best I could! Hi, if you find this message, I love you, I wish you nothing but happiness and health. <333 Please let me know your theories/thoughts, this series will definitely be around 15-16 chapters. So just know I am working on it!

Moonstruck Series Masterlist

Two days earlier…

After you calmed down, Yoongi told you about his original plan. Arriving at the safehouse was part of it, but he was actually in search of a rare plant. He had rummaged through Professor Seokjin’s office to see if there were any clues that would tell him where he went and sure enough, there were secret files about Blue Calamus on his computer.

Aka truth weed. Ingesting the plant would make you susceptible to speaking the truth for half an hour. Yoongi suspected that if he found the truth weed, he would find Jin too. And that meant he could help you and him find out what happened to Hoseok and his sister.

The first 24 hours were bad luck. You and Yoongi were following Jin’s footsteps, hitting up all the spots truth weed was claimed to be grown at. Unfortunately, every place turned out to be a dead end or false advertisement. After resting at a motel, the two of you accepted your defeat and ventured into the woods.

“Damn it. That town was our last hope,” Yoongi grumbled, taking a seat on a log. You took a look at the map Yoongi had brought and the glint in your eyes caught his attention. “What is it?”

“My mother’s campus is nearby… maybe she can help. I haven’t heard from her in a while.”

“Got your phone?”

“No. It wasn’t on me when Sunghyun teleported me.”

“I’ll call her.” The professor dialed her number and waited. When it finally went to voicemail, he tried again. “She’s not picking up.”

“It’s fine. Let’s just go.”

As you and Yoongi drew nearer, his phone suddenly buzzed with over 100+ messages and calls. The device was in a frenzy as notifications popped up nonstop. “HELP”, “SAVE US”, “DANGER” were the keywords you could make out and the ones responsible for the messages were three people: Seokjin, Hoseok, and your mother. 

“What the hell is happening?!” Yoongi asked, swiping his thumb to open the messages and read them as fast as he could while more flooded in. 

“Look, Professor Jin’s calling!”

“I see that, but my phone is glitching like crazy!” It took a few tries, but he finally managed to pick up the call.

“Get your ass over to [M/N]’s campus now! We’re being attacked!” A loud explosion could be heard in the background, alarming you and Yoongi both. He desperately called out Jin’s name, but the connection had fizzled out.

Filled with a mixture of fear and determination, you and Yoongi realized the gravity of the situation. You had to act now because that meant your mother’s safety was at stake too. And the kids. The poor, innocent kids. 

With a renewed sense of urgency, you and the professor swiftly abandoned your search for truth weed and sprinted to your mother’s workplace. 

The damage was far worse than anything you could’ve imagined. The combined elementary and junior high school building was crumbling to the ground, fire was spreading at a rapid rate, and gunshots were heard in the distance.

You jumped right into battle, quickly realizing the culprits weren’t human. It was a team of werewolves and vampires—the same werewolves and vampires you might’ve pissed off during the time your humanity was off. 

“Ah shit…”

“Recognize us, you filthy hybrid?” one of the vampires taunted. Yoongi whipped his head to look at you.

“You know them?”

“I might’ve… tortured them when I turned off my humanity,” you admitted, offering him a sheepish grin. Yoongi pulled out his shotgun from his backpack, having half a mind to shoot you instead but restrained himself.

“I’ll cover you,” he stated in a gruff voice. You nodded and began taking them down one by one. The professor covered you as promised until you two made your way inside the burning building. A cry for help alerted you to go upstairs to the second floor and that’s when you found Hoseok and his sister fighting against a team of werewolves. 

Honestly, they could hold their own pretty well. You only jumped in when you saw there was another one trying to sneak up on Dawon. She thanked you and returned the favor by saving you from a grenade. Hoseok was almost unrecognizable with how angry he was. He fought dirty, the remaining wolves clearly not a match for his ire and you remembered why he used to be alpha. However, his bright smile returned when the wolves retreated and he hugged you tightly.

“[Y/N]! You’re alive, oh my god. You don’t understand how happy I am,” He then quickly released you. “Oh man, I bet you want to kill me. I’m so sorry for what I did.” 

“She’s the one who put me in a coma,” a sinister voice said. Hoseok and you glanced over at his sibling, who was pointing her gun in your direction. You waited in suspense for her next move but then she broke out into the same heart-shaped grin Hoseok had. “Just kidding~.”

She lowered her weapon and Hoseok laughed at your stunned pikachu-meme face. “You got her good!”

“What the fuck is going on?!” you exclaimed, crossing your arms at the two siblings. 

“Meet my sister, Dawon.”

“I go by Jiwoo now, actually,” she replied. 

“Right, we changed our identities. I still prefer Hoseok.”

“Nice to see you again,” Jiwoo states with a wave. “Thanks for not killing me.”

“Ditto…?” you said, confused beyond compare.

“Wait, we lost Professor Jin and your mom,” Hoseok said, frantically looking around. You copied his actions and realized you had lost someone too.

“Professor Min was just with me.”

Some more gunshots were heard from the rooftop of the building, so the three of you headed there. Professor Jin had set up a force field to shield him, your mother, and Professor Min while a team of vampires attacked from all sides. Once again you jumped in with zero hesitation but the added assistance of the Jung siblings ensured your victory. The enemies retreated and you all got off the burning building before the flames could engulf you all.

“What happened to my mother?” you asked worriedly. Professor Jin was carrying her limp body, which was full of bloody lacerations and bullet wounds. Everyone had been injured to some degree, but your mother received the most damage.

“She fought hard to protect her employees and students. She distracted the enemies while everyone ran. It’s our fault. We had brought them here to the school.”

“I’m fine,” your mother croaked. “Put me down, I can walk.”

“Are you joking?” you scolded. “You’re lucky to even be alive.”

“What do we do now?” Yoongi asked, watching the school building continue to burn down.

“My employees and I had an evacuation plan put in place in case this happens. There’s a secret tunnel beneath the school that leads to an underground chamber. I can heal myself there.”

The underground chamber was concealed from the outside world, shielded by layers of enchantments and natural barriers. Its interior was illuminated by soft, ethereal light emanating from glowing crystals embedded in the walls. Children’s laughter could be heard from all around and you were relieved to see everyone was okay.

Employees of your mother’s took her from Jin’s arms, immediately grabbing some healing herbs and medicinal plants that grew along the chamber’s walls. They reassured you she would be okay and that the herbs would accelerate her recovery. 

Some students greeted you and you were pleasantly surprised at how welcoming they were. Considering the last time you saw them was when you had a gun in your hand, the kind gesture touched your heart. They asked if you defeated the bad guys, to which you gave them a thumbs up. It was so pure how they looked at you like you were a superhero and it reminded you of why you wanted children in the first place. 

“Hey, we found a place to talk,” Jin said with a nod of his head for you to join him. You bid farewell to the kids and made your way over to the secluded area away from the crowd. 

Everyone took a seat on the comfortable cushions the chamber provided, you being the last to sit in the circle. You noticed Hoseok caressing Yoongi’s face, most likely asking him about his scar. Something about the moment seemed… tender. Until Professor Min swatted his hand away, face flushed.

“We have a lot to discuss,” Jin said with a loud clap to get everyone’s attention. He pointed his pressed palms at you. “[Y/N]. I’m sure you have questions.”

“Yeah… Why are you here? With them?” You gestured to the Jung siblings and they both pointed at themselves as if there were any other Jungs around.

“When I quit my job, I went on a mission to find Blue Calamus because that would be the only way to figure out what was going on and prove to Namjoon that I didn’t orchestrate anything.”

“Why not use a truth spell? You’re a witch. You’ve done it before.”

“I felt like my magic was being tampered with. Spells always have loopholes and by then it was too late. Once I left campus, I couldn’t get back in. Something was blocking me. Like a magic that surpassed mine. I couldn’t text or call anyone on campus.”

“Same here,” Hoseok added. “I tried to message Professor Min and [Y/N], but none of the texts went through. No calls. Nothing.”

“So how did I finally get your call, Jin?” Yoongi questioned.

“I think it’s because you were within a certain radius of me. Whatever magic was being used to block our communication had limits.”

“Do you think it was Ari…?” you asked, though your tone indicated you already knew the answer.

“Most likely. She was my top student,” Jin answered. “Anyway, the hunt for Blue Calamus was nearly impossible. I spent months trying to find it and ran into many dead ends. At one point I ran into the Jungs.”

You turned your attention to Hoseok and he cleared his voice in preparation to speak.

“After I… did what I did to you…” he started to say hesitantly. “I got to the hospital and rescued my sister. We fled town and went to our parents’ safe house to find out they had been murdered.”

He waited for a reaction from you, but you simply said nothing.

“You know?”

“Professor Min and I discovered their bodies yesterday. I’m sorry about your loss. Do you know who killed them?”

“I’m sure we all know who it is.” The whole group gave each other a knowing glance, so Hoseok continued, “Jiwoo got a text saying we deserved it because I tried to warn you about a mole.”

“Jimin…” you muttered.

“Not just Jimin. He’s not working alone. Someone else contacted my sister and family first.”

“Who’s that?”

Jiwoo intervened, “Months ago I was spying on your campus to get more information about Jungkook, so we could kill him. Needless to say, I was spotted. He told me he wanted Jungkook dead too, so we formed an alliance to attack you all on patrol. I described the guy’s face to my brother after I woke up from the coma.”

You anticipated her answer with bated breath. 

“... Kim Taehyung. He’s the other person working with Jimin.”

“Oh my god… Tae wanted Jungkook dead? Tae started this… with Jimin? This is insane,” you said, clenching your fists. Your emotions were in flux because even if it was an obsession, Taehyung never failed to profess his love for you. Killing Jungkook was one thing, but he’d never ask for you to be killed. Would he? 

Did he place that listening device to spy on you for Jimin?

Your gaze fell onto Hoseok and he sighed, waiting for the other shoe to drop. He could tell you were dying to ask the burning question by your conflicted expression. “Ask me. I’ll tell you everything.”

“Why did you kill me? Did Tae… did he force you to do it?” 

“Taehyung, Jimin, doesn’t matter. They were blackmailing me. Jiwoo had been compelled to kill herself if she ever met you. I couldn’t let that happen.”

You raised a brow at this revelation. “Um… I met her,” You engaged in a rapid back-and-forth motion, alternately gesturing towards her and then towards yourself. “How is she alive?” 

“I removed the compulsion with a spell,” Jin explained.

“Hurt like a bitch,” Jiwoo mumbled.

“Okay… How’d you escape your cage in the first place?” you asked Hoseok.

“Someone messed with my food. It made me hallucinate, get angry—I wasn’t thinking straight. It made me strong too. Enough to break out.”

You shot an accusatory look at Professor Min, but Hoseok intervened. “Yoongi didn’t do anything.”

He called him Yoongi…

“And how do you know?”

“Because I didn’t see who brought me my food. I woke up and it was already there. After eating it, it felt like all my negative emotions took control of my body.”

You glanced over at the kids playing on the other side of the chamber, thinking about how you’ll never be able to have one of your own. Hoseok followed your gaze, pained by your crestfallen eyes. “I am truly, truly sorry. I know I can never make it up to you.”

“It’s fine,” you said curtly. “Continue. What happened once you found your parents?”

“We heard gunshots and fled. Didn’t even have enough time to bury them either. It was like whoever was threatening us didn’t want us to. I took Jiwoo to a new town far away, changed our names, and moved on.”

“Until Seokjin came,” Jiwoo informed. “He convinced us to join him in finding the truth weed. Hobi was against it, but I had to know who killed our parents before exacting revenge..”

“Why would he be against it?”

“He didn’t want anything to happen to me.”

Of course. Anything for his sister.

“But that’s when we got ambushed by supernaturals,” Jin said, “The same ones that attacked your mom’s school. They chased us all the way there, but we were so desperate for help and didn’t think about the consequences. We’re sorry, [Y/N]. It’s our fault.”

It’s mine. I pissed them off. They wanted revenge. They must’ve known I was associated with the three of them.

“It’s not. It’s my fault.” Your confession earned you the spotlight. “A lot happened on campus while you were gone, professor. I turned my humanity off. Tortured some supernaturals for kicks. Clearly they wanted revenge. I’m sorry.”

“None of us blame you,” Hoseok stated in a grave voice. “During our battles, one of them said they were paid by someone to do it. There’s a good chance they were the same ones who ran us out of the safehouse too.” You wondered if he was comforting you merely due to his guilt.

“It’s your turn. What’s going on back on campus? How’d you get that scar?” Jin asked Yoongi.

“Excuse me," a sweet, high-pitched voice said kindly. You all turned to see Sarang, the 8-year old vampire girl you remembered being enamored with when your mother took the students on the field trip to BTSU. “Ms. [Y/N]? Your mom wants to see you.”

You got out of your criss-cross sitting position and stood up, following the little girl to another part of the chamber where greenery was abundant. Your mother was tending to one of the flowers, so you grabbed a nearby watering can to help her after thanking Sarang. The little girl ran off to play with her friends, delighted to be of use.

“You always did have a green thumb,” you started to say as you poured water on another flower. Your mother smiled at the comment and you two took a while to water plants in comforting silence. But of course that didn’t last long because as most mothers do, yours started to nag you about how you were doing it all wrong. She couldn’t help but correct you on how much to water, why not to water too much, blah, blah blah. 

“If you get even an extra drop on that one, it’ll die,” she warned, pointing to an odd, fuzzy plant. “Let me do it.”

“You recover fast,” you noted as you got out of her way. “What is all this, Mom?”

“Well, a few years ago I started growing some special plants and herbs in case there was an emergency. Your father was exceptionally great at it and well, since he hasn’t returned yet, I kept it alive and well. It’s our garden.”

The moonstone of your necklace flickered. “I miss him.”

“I miss him too.” She tended to the last plant and set the watering can down. It was then she gave you a hug, which you reciprocated. “I miss you more.”

“I know, Mom.”

“I don’t know what’s going on, but I hope you will tell me,” She patted your back. “I want to help you however I can.”

You stopped hugging her to look her right in the eyes. “Do you happen to have Blue Calamus? It’s known to have a strong minty taste.”

Two hours before the present…

Thanks to your mother and Professor Jin’s expertise, you and your team not only had an adequate supply of truth weed but also tranquilizers. One spell later and the plants from your mother’s garden transformed to a serum that was easy to weaponize. You opted for blow darts while the rest of while everyone else chose syringes.

With time dwindling, you all agreed on a plan and knew there was only one chance to get it right. 

First, Yoongi took a vial of your blood back to campus while you, Jin, Hoseok, and Jiwoo were on standby in the forest. The Flame of Imprisonment prevented supernaturals from entering, so he had to convince Namjoon to blow out the candle. 

Once that was done, you and your team snuck and took out any stragglers who weren’t in the cellar. Jin and the Jung siblings decided to split up to cover more ground on campus. Few minutes later, Jiwoo cried out that she had spotted Jungkook and Sunghyun coming out of the girls’ dorm rooms, so Hoseok bolted in that direction. 

The two siblings were relentless in their chase, firing rounds in an attempt to subdue them. Despite their efforts, the boys evaded every bullet, leaving the Jungs frustrated and desperate. Closing in for the crucial injection with the serum seemed an impossible task.

In the midst of the chase, Professor Jin, quick-witted and determined, joined the pursuit. Using his unique abilities, he materialized in front of Sunghyun, injecting him with the serum before he could react. 

Meanwhile, Jungkook, fear etched across his face, edged backwards away from the trio, seeking an escape from the chaotic scene. The amulet nestled in his pocket began to glow and in an instant, he disappeared. 

“[Y/N],” Professor Jin’s voice rang urgently in your ears. The magical earpieces he conjured up were quite useful. “We got Sunghyun, but Jungkook vanished. He must’ve teleported somewhere.”

“I think I know where he is. I’ll meet you guys in the cellar.”

You switched off the earpiece, exhaling deeply as you ventured through the mountain tunnel. The sire bond had undeniably weakened, yet a subtle tingling sensation persisted whenever Jungkook was near. Upon pinpointing his teleportation, you swiftly made your way to Namjoon's office, where you secured the spare keys.

Standing before the familiar, imposing door, you unlocked it and continued walking until you reached the iron gate entrance. Each step you took weighed down your heart, the haunting echoes of Jungkook’s hurtful words ringing in your ears.

Murderer.

So spiteful. So heartless. So… cruel. You could only come up with one conclusion and that’s why your role in the plan was so painful.

“Who’s there?” 

He doesn’t sense me. The sire bond…

As you drew near, your eyes met Jungkook’s for the first time in what felt like an eternity. Your heart wavered between relief and resentment, torn between the conflicting emotions. The gate that stood between you and him was a tangible barrier that reflected the emotional chasm grown between you two.

Jungkook’s eyes lit up with a mixture of joy and anguish. He had longed to see you again, to know you were safe and unharmed. But as he looked into your eyes, he could sense the pain and betrayal emanating from you. It was a blow to his heart, a realization that the connection you two shared had been severed. 

“[Y/N]...” His voice trembled with the weight of unspoken apologies and the desperate hope for understanding. “I’m so glad you’re okay.”

“Not another word,” you said, voice strained with a mixture of anguish and disappointment. “I don’t want to hear anything you have to say.”

His voice contorted with remorse, regret etched deeply into his features. “N-No… no please.”

He ran up to the gate and was about to unlock it when you snarled at his actions. His head snapped up to see your goldenrod irises and sharp canines ready to tear him to shreds.

“Get back,” you growled. He obeyed and took a step back while showing you what was in his hand. 

“It’s Ari’s notebook. I read everything. You were right about everything.”

“I don’t care!” you shouted, banging your fist on the gate. “Nothing in that book matters anymore. You didn’t believe me…” Your body slumped to the ground, defeated. 

“You didn’t believe me…” you repeated, softer and more broken than the first time. Jungkook dropped to his knees, holding onto the bars of the gate and resting his forehead against it in an attempt to be closer to you. He shut his eyes and fought back his tears.

“I know. I’m so sorry…” Your eyes were lifeless, devoid of love and joy. You were staring past him like he didn’t exist and that pained him the most.

“You didn’t trust me…” 

“I made a terrible mistake. Please,” he pleaded, reaching his hand through the bar to grab yours. You yanked it away, still refusing to look at him.

“Maybe… you don’t love me the same way I love you.”

He shook his head furiously. “No. No. That is not true. Don’t say that.”

“The Jungkook I knew… he would’ve believed me. That means you’re being influenced by something,” Your eyes shifted to meet his, determined and angry. “Or someone.”

You clenched your fist around your blow gun and pointed it at your lover. He was mortified and begged you to stop, but it was too late. You shot it right into his neck, causing him to fall to the ground. You stood up, unlocked the gate, and threw him over your shoulder like he weighed nothing. As you carried him to where the cellar was, you saw your team in the distance heading down the steps. 

The plan was almost done. Just one more step. One that you thought of on your own as soon as you heard about the truth weed.

*Hss*

First to fall was Professor Jin. Professor Min was pissed as expected. 

So he was next.

*Hss*

Then Hoseok and Jiwoo.

*Hss*

*Hss*

You didn’t understand why the cellar door was propped open, so you removed the stone and stepped inside. Taehyung perked up upon seeing you, the pure joy on his face quite endearing. 

“Hi Tae.”

*Hss*

Plan complete.

In the present…

First to wake up was Jungkook, who felt something heavy around his wrists when he tried to move them. The clinking sounds alerted him of his confinement with two other prisoners. 

“Sunghyun! Wake up!” he said, shaking the vampire next to him. Sunghyun groaned and slowly pushed himself up out of his position of laying on his stomach to sit crisscross. 

“What’s going on?”

“Wake Taehyung up next to you.” The vampire obeyed and shook the werewolf by the shoulders. Taehyung opened one eye while ruffling his hair, immediately seeing the shackles and realizing his predicament. 

“The fuck? Hey. Hey!” He shook the shackles violently, as if they would come off from the act alone. “What’s going on?!”

The noise woke up the others. In the cage next to theirs were Jimin, Yoongi, and Namjoon; Next cage had Jin with the Jung siblings; Last cage contained Ari, who for some reason was still unconscious . They all shared the same looks of betrayal and confusion until you cleared your throat loudly, standing in front of them all.

“Took you all long enough,” you sneered. 

“What’s the meaning of this?” Professor Jin asked as he slowly stood up. His attempts at a spell to break out were futile and you let out a chuckle when his frustrated expressions gave him away.

“Magic dampening cuffs,” you informed him. “No one’s leaving.”

“Why are we here? I thought we were working together!” Yoongi exclaimed, sending you a glare that could kill. 

“We were. But I don’t trust anyone anymore. And now that you’ve all been exposed to truth weed, I’m going to be asking the questions now.”

The look of shock spread across everyone’s faces was pure satisfaction. Now they’ll finally get a taste of what it’s like to be fooled.

“My first question: What is something you’re hiding from me that you’re guilty of?”

Truth be told, no one knew the full extent of the truth weed’s effects aside from it lasting half an hour. Good thing you had all the time in the world to figure it out, though you didn’t really know what to expect. Taehyung was the first to answer.

“I bite my nails even though you told me to stop.” 

Everyone stared at him and he slapped his mouth shut with his hand.

“I’m afraid of microwaves,” Jungkook revealed. The attention diverted to him now, who cursed and turned his back towards you, face flushed. You’re gonna have to dig more into that later.

“I practice arguments in the shower,” Sunghyun said.

“I sleep naked,” Yoongi confessed.��

“I hate mint chocolate ice cream,” Namjoon added. That caused a rise in some, surprisingly enough.

“I’ve seen Taehyung in his underwear. It was red,” Jimin informed. 

“I can’t handle alcohol well,” Hoseok said while blushing.

“I’m the only 10 in this room,” Jin bragged. “You’re all 8’s.” 

“I was going to give you 30% of my profits when I published my novel,” Sunghyun said. You raised an eyebrow at this because you deserve at least 80% for your troubles. 

“Part of me still wants to kill you, but I’m trying to get over it,” Jiwoo said nonchalantly. The silence in the room was deafening and you shook your head quickly to snap out of your trance from these… discoveries. Maybe this wouldn’t be as easy as you thought.

“Okay, this is not what I was expecting,” you said, rubbing your chin in thought. “What is something you’ve done to hurt me physically or mentally?”

“I recorded our sessions,” Jin said, but you waved him off with your hand.

“I know that already.”

“I wrote about your life story because it was more interesting than my own,” Sunghyun replied.

“I know that already,” you repeated.

“I killed you,” Hoseok said, apologizing once more after.

“I know that already too…” you said through gritted teeth.

“I hurt you in our last battle,” Jiwoo said with a bright smile while looking up at the ceiling like she was reminiscing. “Got some good hits in before you, uh, put me in a coma.”

“This is ridiculous,” you muttered while facepalming yourself. 

“I kissed Jungkook.”

In an instant, your eyes darted towards Jimin, who leaned casually against the wall with a devilish smirk, one foot casually propped up. He seemed to revel in the revelation, a silent observer of the unfolding drama. The weight of his gaze bore into you as you redirected your attention to Jungkook, whose big, round eyes betrayed his emotions.

Jungkook attempted to cover his mouth, a futile effort to suppress what came next, but his admission slipped through the cracks.

"And I felt something," he confessed, the words piercing through you like a dagger to the heart. "B-But not anymore!" The added assurance seemed almost laughable; the damage was done, irreversible.

Before you could process this devastating revelation, muffled sounds emanated from Yoongi. He, too, covered his mouth with both hands, going to extremes by biting the collar of his shirt in a desperate attempt to stifle his own words.

Namjoon and Jimin teamed up to pin one of Yoongi’s arms down by his side, coercing him to speak. 

“I was the one who released Hoseok from his cage,” Yoongi finally admitted.

“Oh dear god…” you gasped, clutching your chest. Everything suddenly felt constrained, tight enough to explode. “Why…?”

“... Because I love him. I didn’t know he was going to hurt you. I promise.”

“I put a bug in your wolf plush,” Taehyung confessed without any remorse. You knew this fact to be true for a while now, but it still stung to hear him confirm it. 

“I… I…” Namjoon kept uttering small sounds, but no words were formed. Then, without warning, he turned to face the wall, standing still for a moment before repeatedly smashing his head against the concrete. Blood quickly trickled down his face, and you shouted for him to stop.

Yoongi, in a desperate attempt to intervene, positioned himself between Namjoon and the wall.

“Namjoon! Don’t do this!” he pleaded, pushing him back in a desperate attempt to stop the violence.

Smash. Smash. Smash. 

Jimin stood idly by, an eerie calmness in his demeanor as chaos erupted around him. Everyone was shouting over each other, quickly falling into a panicked state.

“Why is he doing this?! Stop it!!!” you cried, holding onto the sides of your head in distress.

A sinister grin played on Jimin's lips as he casually revealed his role in the unfolding mayhem. 

“Because I compelled him,” he said, throwing his head back in a chilling cackle. He got off the wall he was leaning on to approach the bars of the cage closer to you. “Couldn’t have him spill the secrets too soon. Spoils the surprise.”

Wham. Wham. Wham.

“Make it stop! Make him stop!”

Namjoon’s entire face was covered in blood at this point. His nose broken, skull fractured, but he continued to mindlessly bang his head against the hard concrete like a robot devoid of pain. 

“Alright, Namjoon. That’s enough,” Jimin ordered with a snap of his fingers. Namjoon ceased his actions right away and Yoongi’s quick reflexes caught his limp body.

“You bastard…” Yoongi said, seething with rage. Jimin seized Namjoon from Yoongi’s grasp and held the unconscious professor in a merciless headlock. 

“I’m starving… dying takes a lot out of you.” His red-blood sclera and protruding veins sent shivers down Yoongi’s spine, prompting him to take a step back. He frantically patted down his body, realizing his lack of weaponry—you had removed everyone’s arms during your tranquilizing sweep. Jimin grinned devilishly, exhibiting his fangs for everyone to see. Everyone begged him to stop, but your voice resonated the loudest.

“Stop!!! Why are you doing this?!” you yelled. Jimin retracted his fangs and tilted his head at you in amusement.

“Because of you. And your mom. And Jungkook. You just had to be born and ruin everything. You shouldn’t even exist, you damn filthy hybrid.”

The ones who attacked us at mom’s school said the same thing.

“ You sent those supernaturals to attack us. To follow Jin, Hoseok, and Jiwoo to my mom’s school.”

He nodded, the joyful giggle he let out a stark contrast to his true nature. Your fists clenched in response.

“... You killed Hoseok’s parents. Didn’t you?”

“I mean, yeah, I ordered for them to be killed.”

“Ordered who?”

“Someone close to you. They’re actually blood-related to you, believe it or not.”

“Tell me their names.”

“The Supernatural Threat Response and Investigation Division of Enforcement.”

“Who, S.T.R.I.D.E? The fake as hell detective agency? Professor Min found that out pretty quick. What do you want?”

“For you to die. You’re the reason why my life has been hell. Your mother left me and then when I finally moved on, you just had to go after Jungkook.”

“You promised me she wouldn’t die. That wasn’t part of the deal!” Taehyung shouted.

“What deal?” you questioned.

“I bit Jimin to hide his stupid flower tattoo and he promised me he wouldn’t kill you.”

“You did what?!”

“Hey, I’m keeping my promise. Ari, darling…” Jimin said in a low voice. You glanced over to your best friend, who was still asleep on her cot. “Wake up.”

Her eyes snapped open, widening as if possessed. She rose abruptly, turning her head without moving her entire body like a creepy doll. Her lips curled into a bone-chilling grin.

“I didn’t say I was going to kill her,” Jimin quipped. You watched as she effortlessly tore through the magic-dampening cuffs, a black aura emanating from her body. 

“[Y/N] RUN!” Jungkook and Taehyung urged.

“She’s been consumed by dark magic! That’s not Ari anymore!” Jin added. 

You were already racing to the keypad, inputting the passcode at lightning speed. However, the door wouldn’t budge. A frustrated curse left your lips as you frantically tried again only to meet the same fate.

"The password changed!" Yoongi's voice rang out, a moment too late. Your finger had already pressed the enter key, and a surge of electricity coursed through your body at the failed third attempt. An agonizing scream escaped your lips as you crumpled to the ground, back arching in pain, fingers twitching involuntarily.

As you lay there, vulnerable and writhing, Jimin's menacing face appeared above you, a Cheshire grin etched on his lips. The infuriating expression only fueled your desire to see him pay. Ari, wearing a mask of faux pity, also looked down at you, and in your agony, you found yourself pleading with her for assistance.

“Ari… I don’t care about the dark magic… I know you’re strong enough to beat it. Don’t do this.”

“Aw, she thinks you still care about her,” Jimin teased with a pout. He swung an arm around her shoulder, laughter echoing in the tense air. “Sorry, but your bestie is loyal to me. Thanks for getting me out of the cage, love.”

“Anything for you,” Ari replied, her lips now a dark black. 

Electricity was nothing. You’d heal in a few minutes; you just had to stall for time. 

“Why are you loyal to him? He doesn’t love you. He loves Jungkook.”

A flicker of vulnerability crossed Ari's face, a brief shift from the facade of evil to a moment of crestfallen realization. It’s possible to get through to her, you knew it.

“Do you really want to live your life as second best to this motherfucker?” you asked, not breaking eye contact with her. “He’s using you. He’s never loved you at all. This is madness!”

Jimin huffed and stomped down on your abdominals, crushing your ribs with a loud crack.

“Did I say you could fucking speak?” he spat, voice laced with venom. You laid there groaning and holding your stomach, the pain radiating through your body.

Just then, the cellar door swung open, revealing two unfamiliar figures who peered down at you. They bore the appearance of an elderly couple in their sixties, their gray hair and modest attire suggesting a quiet, unassuming life. Yet, the scent of your mother's perfume wafted into your nostrils. 

Coincidence? Couldn’t be. Everything has been carefully calculated since the beginning. Who were these people?

“What the hell are you doing?” the old woman asked Jimin, hands on her hips in disapproval. “She’s down. Let’s just kill her.”

“Yeah, or else this would’ve been all for nothing. Where’s the White Oak Stake?” the old man pressed.

“Calm down, gramps. My lady here has it stashed in a safe place,” Jimin said, gesturing with the nod of his head at Ari. The old man placed his hand out palm up, demanding for the item.  

“Well? Give it here.” Ari rolled her eyes in response. “Hey. Haven’t you learned how to respect your elders?”

“And haven’t you ever heard of hand cream you wrinkled piece of—”

“Watch your mouth!”

The old woman put her hand on her husband’s shoulder before things could escalate. “Now, now. We’re a team. Give the vampire some credit. I mean, having him compel his own professor to deceive his parents and gain the key to the armory was genius. We owe him our thanks for the stake.”

“That’ll teach them to cut me off,” Jimin said and they all erupted in laughter. 

He was cut off? The blood bags… he drank the Jungs’ blood and then tricked me into doing the same. Fuck him!

You may not have been operating at 100% capacity, but you weren’t sticking around to find out what these people’s intentions were. Slowly, your hand delved into your pocket, fingers searching for anything of use. A smooth surface met your touch, and you pulled it out with a mix of hope and desperation.

Sunghyun’s amulet. You looted it from Jungkook earlier when he was unconscious. The thought raced through your mind—could it siphon the hybrid magic out of you and save you?

Ari, ever watchful, caught wind of your furtive actions. Before she could unleash her formidable powers and reduce you to nothingness, you unleashed a blinding burst of energy. The brilliance of the white blast momentarily blinded everyone in the room, providing you with the cover you needed to slip away.

"She's gone!" cried the old woman.

"Go get her!" barked the old man. Jimin's eyes narrowed in determination as he harnessed his supernatural speed to track you down. In the same instant, Ari's eyes transformed into pools of pitch black, racing at lightning speed to pinpoint your elusive whereabouts.

The bitter night air greeted you as you burst into the open, the moon casting an ethereal glow on the snow-covered landscape. Your surroundings blurred as you stumbled forward, guided only by the instinct to put as much distance as possible between yourself and the conspirators who sought your demise.

The frozen lake loomed ahead, its icy surface reflecting the silent chaos that unfolded around you. Your breaths came in ragged gasps as you approached the edge, the lake standing as both a barrier and a potential escape route.

As you hesitated on the brink, unsure of your next move, Jimin caught up, his eyes ablaze with determination. Sensing the urgency, he lunged at you, aiming to thwart your escape. In the ensuing struggle, the amulet slipped from your grasp and landed on the frozen lake, its glow momentarily illuminating the icy surface.

Before you could react, he seized you by the shoulders, his grip like vices on your flesh. He forced you to the ground with a ruthless strength that left you breathless.

"You're pitiful," Jimin hissed, his voice dripping with contempt. "Your existence is an aberration, an insult to the natural order."

You struggled against his hold, your eyes narrowing with defiance. "You won't break me, Jimin. I won't let you."

Jimin's lips curled into a cruel smile as he pressed you harder against the cold ground. "You think your defiance matters? You're a mistake, an anomaly. The world would be better off without you."

He leaned in, his face inches from yours, his eyes drilling into yours with a toxic mixture of hatred and twisted desire. "Jungkook chose you because of a bond that's not even real. Once I end you, he'll see the truth. You're nothing, [Y/N].”

Your breath caught in her throat as she felt the weight of his words. Jimin continued his verbal assault, each word a venomous arrow aimed at your core. "You cling to the illusion of love, a love built on a lie. I'll free Jungkook from this illusion. Free him from the burden of your existence."

Before you could respond, the world shifted. The ground gave way beneath you two, and in a sudden, chaotic descent, y’all tumbled into the icy abyss of the frozen lake. The air turned to a piercing chill, and the echoes of Jimin's menacing words faded into the murky depths.

The amulet plunged into the suffocating embrace of the water as well, its dim glow your only hope. You made a desperate attempt to swim towards it, reaching out in the hope of grasping salvation, but Jimin moved with unnatural swiftness. Underwater, he seized your neck and snapped it with a cold finality. He abandoned your unconscious form, lost in the icy currents, desperately searching for the surface.

Jimin wouldn’t have survived if not for Ari. She lifted him from the ice, water dripping from his sputtering form. He flashed her a bright smile and triumphantly shouted, “I killed her!”

“Temporarily. She’ll come back,” Ari responded calmly.

“I know, but it still felt good. Thanks for pulling me up.” Jimin expected to be set down on solid ground, but Ari defied his expectation, keeping him suspended in the air. “You can put me down now.”

Ari's gaze, however, remained unwavering. “Was [Y/N] telling the truth?”

Jimin scoffed. “What truth—about Jungkook? Sweetheart, you knew this already.”

Ari persisted, her tone cutting through the icy air. “Not him. About you not loving me… at all.”

Jimin's confident facade wavered, but he quickly masked it with a dismissive smirk. “That's ridiculous.”

“Do you love me?” she pressed, her voice steady but demanding an answer.

Jimin winced, the truth serum coursing through his veins amplifying the pain of his conflicted emotions. He tried to evade her question, his words stumbling over the raw honesty he couldn't suppress. "Ari, it's not that simple. You know my priorities—"

Ari's frustration erupted in a surge of magical energy, causing Jimin to flinch. "Answer the damn question.”

Jimin's gaze faltered, and he swallowed hard, the weight of the truth serum pushing him to the brink of revelation. "Ari, I... I care for you.”

Ari's expression hardened, a mixture of disappointment and anger etched across her features. "Care for me? Did you ever love me?”

He no longer could suppress the truth. “Not in the way you want me to.”

Ari's features tightened as the reality of his confession settled in. The revelation was a bitter pill, the taste of betrayal lingering in the cold air between them. She took a step back, her gaze now devoid of the vulnerability she had revealed moments before. "I see..."

The magical bonds that had kept Jimin suspended in the air wavered. With a swift motion, Ari withdrew her support, letting Jimin plummet back into the icy lake from which he had been rescued moments ago.

*Splash!*

“Perhaps you need some time to rethink your answer. I hope as the water fills your lungs until you suffocate and die over and over again will help you come to your senses. Now…”

Ari extended her hand over the frozen lake, fingers tracing a glowing pattern in the air. Chanting softly, she summoned magical currents that shimmered across the icy surface. With a decisive motion, she pointed her fingers downward.

A radiant stream of magic flowed towards the submerged you. The water yielded to Ari's spell, parting to reveal your unconscious form. Her magic cradled you, forming a protective cocoon that shielded you from the freezing depths.

As you emerged from the water, Ari delicately guided you to the surface. 

“It’s time for you to meet your grandparents, bestie.”

I hope you enjoyed it!!! Leave me your theories/thoughts anytime. Thank you :)

Tag List: @horanghae18 | @gee-nee | @mrcleanheichou | @kookwolf | @hisunshiine | @ggukkieland | @veryuniquenamegoeshere | @holyhumorliteraturelight | @namjoonies-dimple | @iloverubberduckiez-blog | @mono-kookie | @monetsberet | @beingbeings |  @millie-ionaire05 | @awsome-small-k | @purpleheartsfortae | @ggsmashgg | @hopesmoon | @d-noona | @a-kookie-with-my-tae | @jooniegloomie | @hodginss | @hear-me-growl | @starlight-night0 | @music-makes-me-shine | @mama-m0chi | @staerryminimini | @seoul9711 | @sugamonster22 | @moments-of-melancholy | @giadalin | @rageyoudamnednerd | @billboard-singer | @emmmui | @bts-sexo | @krystle1990 | @sugaslittlekookies | @laurynne5

@jksunflower | @shileh | @angellesword | @chimchoom | @demonslover | @channiespup | @bts-ruu | @doublebunv 

#moonstruck

[ittomi]

Moonstruck (12)

Werewolf & Vampire Hybrid!AU, Supernatural!AU | Hybrid!Jungkook x Hybrid!Reader | Werewolf!Taehyung x Hybrid!Reader (ft. BTS)

genre: smut, angst, e2l, supernatural, thriller, slow burn

rating: mature

description: Too much is at stake for you to stay on campus. Jimin must not get your blood no matter what. 

word count: 8k

warnings: contains SPOILERS! Cussing, mention of blood, death, corpses, weapons, tranquilizers, infidelity

a/n: It’s summer break and I’m BACK! Please know I love you all from the bottom of my heart if you are still keeping up with my series. I cannot thank you enough for your patience. Enjoy! Please let me know what you think. :)

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[ittomi]

wicked • 18

↳ Summary: In a desperate hope to stop war from breaking you are a serviced to wed the most vile man alive, the one who has committed atrocities and war crimes beyond comprehension, he who is responsible for the fall of many nations, the wicked prince who’s heart is made of stone. You are to marry a man who challenges every belief and moral you stand for, all while being faced in a foreign land with nobody but yourself too trust…But are you both truly that different? Or is hate not too far from love?

↳ Pairing: Jungkook/reader

↳ Genre: arranged marriage AU, enemies to lovers, it’s kind of a period AU??? Historical but also technically not? prince!AU, eventual smut

Word Count: 12k

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tags: oral (f), tiddie sucking…love kink?, teasing, vaginal fingering, begging, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, squirting (yeah…), soft dom!kook, loss of virginity, penetrative sex, it doesn’t fit, but only for a moment, size kink,  possessiveness, multiple positions, slight spanking, corruption kink if you squint, creampies (wrap it before you tap it, condoms don’t exist in this au so…yknow)

Note: this chapter was not supposed to be so horny but the brain insisted 💅

Chapel bells could be heard, a somber cry of the hazy day ahead, you sniffled trying to get the smell of ash out of your nose, squinting as you glanced through the cracked tent, the sky tinted and hazy.

You didn’t remember the sun looking quite that color, it was distorted from normal, another bell chimed and you could hear the camp from even this distant, a crackle of the fire and a sob.

“Focus!” Baba Enàir slapped the stick in front of your desk making you jump.

“Sorry Baba.”

“You can say sorry to all the folks who rely on your hands to save their kin,” Her eyes glowered down at you, “As for me, you will do good and well to pay attention.”

Your lips twitched as you stared down at your desk, eyes slowly squinting into a glare before briefly glancing behind her once more towards the open flap of the tent where you watched the girls, hands all joined skipping in a circle.

“Why can’t I be excused?” 

Baba Enair’s eyes followed yours as she sighed, perhaps taking pity on you, though if she did her eyes didn’t show it. 

“You are the Princess of Eunoia, the people look to you for hope, not the court girls.” Baba Enair replied, “Your dryad blood allows you to heal in a way other girls cannot, that other people cannot. It isn’t fair, but it’s for the war, the amount of lives you can save alone compares to ten of the court girls. It’s imperative that your skill is honed. Now focus once more.”

You sighed, you had heard the same reason again and again, one day you hoped it would finally mean something to you though, today however, was not that day.

Regardless of how you felt, you stuck your hands back into the moon water, a small beautiful red fish, evidentially dying as it struggled to swim around. 

You closed your eyes.

“Now start your three part breath, calm your mind.” Baba Enair instructed.

You took a deep breath from your stomach, slowly expanding it to your chest and then your throat, finally letting it exhale, after a few more breaths you began to speak.

“Ni esta- upon I cemen, eless- mama na- laiva,” 

“Louder.” Baba Enair commanded.

“Let your coiv- mauime- celusse minna -yes’s eala-“ you winced as you yanked your hands from the water, the water boiling and your lips parting, feeling a piece of your heart crack at the fish, no longer swimming, but floating.

Your eyes watered as your lips trembled, you wanted him to have a peaceful passing, but all you caused was pain…

Baba Enair slapped the stick on your table, “You were too fast, too hasty! Rushing your studies will only make them last longer. Save your tears child, you will have much to cry for if you cannot even heal a fish.”

Your eyes only closed letting the tears stream down your face, the scene shifted, the tent no longer over you, but the sky above.

Thick with clouds of ash and the fire raged on, the sickening smell of death in the air, people groaning in agony and cries of mourning.

“How could you let him die you bitch! He was only a child!”

Your mouth was ajarred as you took an unsteady step back, “I’m- I’m sorry but I tried everything-“ the tent behind you being prepped for the fire, there laid a boy no older than four, a head wound that he had accidentally reopened when he fell down, attempting to play with his friend.

Blood was everywhere, even now covering your hands as tears gathered in your eyes, “I’m sorry.”

The older mother only glared as if you were nothing more than a speck of dirt under her shoe, “You’ve no right to cry!” She screamed out, reaching out as she grabbed your hair making you yelp, “You are no princess of this country! You are nothing! The dryads have abandoned your veins!” 

Guards had already pulled her off but she made sure to shove you down, gravel digging into your palms as sharp jagged pain entered your body.

Tears dripped down your nose as you heard the woman scream and cry, throwing curse words your way only for her voice to be guided elsewhere as her son’s body was carried out of the tent.

Placed into a bag but it was evident he was in there, you glanced at the large bonfire, cowardly. You looked back at the ground, unable to watch them toss his body in.

You heard her wails and cries as the fire burned bright.

And suddenly, it was surrounding you, suffocating you as you cried out, the plead of a child, the skin melting from your hands and-

You gasped, sweat dripping from your body as you sat up in bed, wincing as if something of ash still lingered in your lungs, coughing you grabbed the water carafe from your nightstand, pouring a drink.

Leaning your back against your bed board, it was just a dream…you took a shaky breath, attempting to close your eyes,

‘blood covering your face, skin hanging and cartilage visible’

Your eyes shot back open upon being greeted with Di Jin’s dead face.

It had already been difficult to go to sleep, his cold dead face showing up every time you closed your eyes, or in your dreams once you had finally slept. Tonight had been different though, different difficulties deciding to present themselves this time.

All better forgotten nonetheless.

It had only been two days, and yet, it felt as if no time had passed at all, slowly you peeled the covers off yourself, shivering as you grabbed your nightgown cover, putting the long sleeve on as you walked to the door.

The room suddenly felt too closed in, too suffocating, you needed air.

Opening the door, you were greeted with your personal knight Yoongi, his injuries still healing, but he was doing far better than you.

When the unfortunate event of Di Jin and Seohyun showed up, Yoongi had shown up the morning after, bruised and battered, the entire operation of the tower being sieged a guise to bait him out and even better if it killed him, and worst of all it worked. 

Well, the bit to draw him out, but evidently he was still very much alive.

“Your Highness?” Yoongi raised his brows a little, not surprised to see you up, but a little concern evident in his eyes.

“I wish to go for a walk.” Your voice was a quiet croak, shaky even.

“Of course.” Yoongi replied.

“Can it be…as if I were by myself?” Your lips turned into a small frown.

Yoongi gave you a weak smile, “You won’t even notice me.” 

You nodded before walking past him, a little ways ahead before you could only assume he melded into the shadows, trailing behind unseen but still within a safe distance.

The corridors were empty, save for a few guards who bowed for you before giving you no grief, everyone looked at you differently though. 

It was evident in their eyes, the way they all warily kept a distance. 

Once upon a time, you had gotten used to your title, the Bitch of Eunoia.

But now they had all taken to calling you something different, something new, the Blood-Devoured Bitch. It was a hybrid name, both of Penumbrian and Eunoian background, sickening and yet flattering all the same, it suited you, you supposed.

Stepping out into the courtyard you innately shivered, ice cold air penetrated easily past your cover, wrapping your arms around yourself you took a big breath of air.

It’s crisp cool entered your lungs like new life, and for a moment you felt better.

Sitting down on the bench you curled into yourself, and suddenly the weight of your soul felt heavy again, you were so tired. A type of tired that sleep would not make go away.

Staring at the moon, you let its light be your only comfort, surely better days would come.

Jungkook couldn’t describe his level of worry for you, you had woken up physically fine, a minor wound to your chest where Di Jin had attempted to kill you. But you yourself were not fine.

You looked haunted, any food put in front of you was left untouched, and even if you did eat, you were unable to keep anything down.

Jungkook thought once Wheein was safe, things would get better. But it was clear to him this was hardly the case and what made it worse was you were isolating yourself now, refusing to talk to him or anyone else.

Wheein had desperately wanted to see you but Jungkook firmly sent her back to Skol demanding she take some time to herself, being in the dungeon for the last three weeks was no good for anybody mentally, especially her.

Meanwhile he was left to pick up the pieces of whatever had happened at the estate, and it didn’t take a genius to figure it out. 

He felt horrible, he wanted you to go to the estate because he thought it was safe, but as it turns out, he nearly sent you to your death. He hadn’t pushed the topic with you, left you alone if you didn’t respond.

He just wanted you to be okay, it pained him seeing you like this. 

You felt unreachable, and it made him feel as if he was literally losing his mind.

But tonight was Sunday, the day the family gathered together for dinner, Jungkook’s hopes were low but he could only hope that you would show up, he was worried and even more so at a loss of what to do, or if he could do anything at all.

You killed Di Jin. 

The Eunoian Princess, who had sworn an oath to never kill, who came from a pacifistic nation, who had divine dryad blood running through her veins, killed someone. 

And Jungkook knew you wouldn’t listen to him, it mattered not that you did it in self defense, it didn’t change the fact that you still broke your oath. Dinner had been quiet, nobody talking and this was to be expected, after all, everyone almost murdered your hand maid, you almost died, and then not only killed Di Jin, the kings oldest and dearest friend, but also Seohyun, Jungkook’s old fiancé.

Guards had gone to the estate to clean up the mess only to find her mangled body, torn apart by a wolf- namely yours.

Perhaps it wasn't directly you, but it mattered not, you would still take the guilt.

The doors opened and Jungkook straightened in his seat, you gave a short courtesy before taking your seat next to him, your eyes looked sunken in and it was evident you hadn’t slept a single night. 

Jungkook could feel it clawing at his chest with the urge to do something, anything, but he knew all too well this would be something you would have to reconcile with yourself, in your own time.

Dinner was quiet and his uncle and aunt only murmured conversation, Jungkook could only let out a quiet sigh as he lifted his goblet to his lips, wine almost never solved his problems but it did help him relax. 

“Yes, apparently a wild pack of dogs attacked Vail yesterday,” Jeong Dae’s voice was quiet, Areum’s eyes on him as she took a sip of her wine.

Their voices were the only one’s at the table that have yet to talk, after all they had always managed to keep the conversation going in these awkward events.

You were twirling your soup in its bowl, having not attempted to eat, eyes strictly somewhere between the table and your food.

“Well there needs to be more guards posted in the outer district’s now that this whole assassin business is finished,” Areum replied, leaning back in her chair, “They had four fatality’s which could’ve been prevented with adequate soldiers number’s.”

“Or perhaps we just need better soldiers,” Jeong Dae mused, “Perhaps our War Matron should make her return.”

You finally gathered a spoonful of your soup, watching the steam rise from it’s surface before you pushed it into your mouth. Jungkook wasn’t trying to stare, but it was difficult to look away when you were having to force every drop of broth down.

Areum scoffed, “Unless war is on the horizon I would rather rot. There was only one guard there, and he was passing through on his patrol.” 

You gathered another spoonful, looking at it once more as if having to mentally prepare yourself. 

“Is a shame though,” Jeong Dae sighed, “It was an absolute mess when I arrived, blood everywhere, one of the poor lad’s had his throat ripped out-”

A loud cough cut off the conversation, all eyes on you as you grabbed your mouth, lurching in your seat as if attempting to not vomit, “Excuse me.” You didn’t even so much as wait for a reply, shoving yourself out of your chair and promptly exiting. 

Jungkook was immediately pushing himself out of his chair, not even saying a word as he quickly followed after you. You probably didn’t want to see him, but he simply couldn’t stand watching you like this. 

He needed to do something, anything. 

“Y/n!” He called out as you rushed down the hall. 

You shook your head as you took a sharp left, going down the stairs towards the cellar, Jungkook quickly stepping down the stairs as he called your name once more. 

It was dark and only candles lit the air, dust could be seen if one got too close, walls of wine and dry goods stored as you turned the corner of a storage wall, weaving towards the very back where surely no one would go. 

Jungkook quickly followed behind, turning the last corner of the storage wall before he sighed out, a dead end with you at the last wall, back still turned but your sobs evident, hands covering your eyes as you tried to regain your breath but struggling to do so. 

It came out in choked wheezes as you coughed and gagged, struggling to calm yourself down, flashes of blood, images of flesh and gore, no matter how many times you washed out your mouth, you could still taste it. 

Raw flesh going down your throat. 

Jungkook finally stopped at your back, unable to find any words, he could only pull you to face him, and he hated it, how it always seemed your face was filled with tears more than smiles, “I can’t get it out!” 

You felt like a helpless child all over again, unable to help yourself let alone anyone else, but you felt so lost, you didn’t know what to do, you had all of these new feelings, all of these new sins you had to carry. 

You let out another sob as Jungkook pulled you in, and you could do nothing but collapse against him as you cried, “I can’t get the taste out! No matter- wh-what I eat, what I drink, I still taste it!” 

Jungkook only soothing hushed you, pressing his lips on top of your head, “I know.” He ushered softly, “I’m sorry.”

His arms wrapped around you tighter as you cried, resting your head into his shoulder, after a few minutes passed you had finally managed to calm your breath into steady.

“I can’t go back, I can’t undo everything I’ve done, I don’t know what to do anymore,” You tried to not weep but the tears slowly began to trickle back down your cheeks as you lamented, “My whole life i’ve been told I’m supposed to save lives,”

You pressed your hands against his jacket, looking up at him, “So why is it, all I ever seem to do is take them?” 

Jungkook tenderly cupped your cheeks in his hands, thumbing the tears away as he pressed his forehead against yours, “I can’t speak for all of your past doings, but I can speak for what happened at the estate, your survival was dependent on your ability to defend yourself. You were forced to do what anybody would do.”

You shook your head in remorse, closing your eyes as you stifled a sob, Jungkook tenderly stroking your cheeks as he continued, “Humans are instinctive creatures, though you are part dryad, it seems violence runs in your veins.” 

You sniffled, “That’s terrifying! You should be terrified. Everyone looks at me differently now, certainly you do as well, I killed the woman who was supposed to be your wife!” 

Jungkook sighed, tenderly tracing your jawline with those long fingers of his, “The only thing that truly terrified me? Was when you walked through those gates covered in blood, and I realized I had unknowingly sent you to your death, unable to be there for you, unable to protect you, failing as a husband. That terrifies me.” 

Your lips trembled as Jungkook’s fingers traced down your neck to your collarbone, “But you? I told you to show me all of you, and that I would take you as you are, my words still stand.” His fingers trailed down the center of your chest, stopping at the covered wound, the mark where Di Jin had attempted to make his finishing blow. 

“How could I be afraid of someone I love?” It was nothing louder than a whisper. 

It caused your gut to wrench as you violently shook your head, “Don’t say that, please don’t say that Jungkook.” You immediately escaped his arms, every step you took back Jungkook closed the gap with another forward. 

“I don’t expect it to be requited, you don’t have to say it back Y/n but I’ve went through all stages of grief about it, I can’t change it,” Jungkook wasn’t backing down though, “I am in love with you and everything I thought I knew about love, everything I thought I knew about women, feelings, all of it, you came into my life and taught me that I was a fool to ever assume as much. I love you.” 

“Stop saying it! Please, you don’t mean that, please don’t say it so easily…”

Your back was pressed against the wall as you shook your head, Jungkook standing tall in front you, delicately leaning down, both his forearms on either side of you as he whispered, “I love you Y/n, and you will not dictate to me whether that is the truth or not. My love for you has been anything but easy, don’t discredit how I feel because I’m the first to admit it.”

“You can’t love me,” You whispered, eyes blurring once more as flashes of Seohyun’s mangled body appeared in your vision. 

“Loving you is like loving the sun,” Jungkook replied softly, “Effortless, and if I’m meant to burn in its light, then I'd die happily in doing so. My precious sun, the light of my life. Let me love you, let me take care of you, let me protect you, let me never leave your side again.”

“Jungkook…”

“I failed you, let you leave my side, sent you to the estate. It’s ultimately my own fault, and I’ll spend the rest of my life redeeming myself for it. But please, don’t punish me anymore,” Jungkook’s eyes sombered, a sort of tender plea in them, “I can’t be apart from you anymore, I’ve tried to give you space, time to think, to heal, but just as you need me, I need you. I need you just like the moon needs the sun.” 

You had no words, unable to speak, overwhelmed by so many different feelings, but one thing you knew for certain was that when you looked at Jungkook, you felt at home. You said nothing, only gently laying your forehead in the crook of his neck, arms wrapping around him. 

Trying to drown out the voices, the memories in his warmth, you were so terribly homesick, and Jungkook was surely your only remedy to this. 

His arms wrapped around you in return, holding you tightly as he pressed a kiss against your head, “It’s selfish, but please, don’t deny me, love me, lay with me, we’re married, but I want you to be my wife.”

“Take me back to our bedroom.” You whispered to him, curling into his warmth as you shuddered, trying so hard to not let the vivid grotesque images back into your mind. 

There was nothing quite like the warmth a bath could offer, steaming wafting from heat and dipping your body in made you realize just how chilled you had become throughout the day. Perhaps the best part was sitting perched in your husband’s lap, head laying on his shoulder as he tended to you.

The warmth of the washcloth running along your body, his hands that had easily taken tens if not hundreds of lives tenderly running through your hair as he washed you, he of course didn’t miss the opportunity to feather your neck in kisses. 

“Is this okay?” He whispered in your ear, you nodded wanting nothing more than for him to keep making you forget, you didn’t want to remember anymore. 

Jungkook was still tenderly cleaning you up, lips occasionally going back to your neck with a few gentle kisses and eventually after bathing you both settled in the water, just enjoying one another’s embrace. 

His fingers tracing circles on your back before running down your waist, squeezing your ass for a moment before his hand would return back up your waist, touching you however he wanted, simply because he could. 

It was a comforting gesture, but it was also evident how aroused you both were, every time his hand would dip under the water, it made your body just a little more excited, feeling his hand gripping your flesh tightly, making you shift a little and the first tiniest audible moan escaping your lips. 

You could feel it briefly, his hardened cock resting against his chiseled abdomen, Jungkook’s lips pressed against your neck once more, this time suckling the skin as his other hand trailing down your waist before gripping the other side of your ass. 

A soft moan escaped your lips, making your hips shift, nudging his cock once more making his lips suckle your skin a little harder, he released the skin after a moment, as if not wanting to mark it, “Let me make you feel good, my little sun.”

His fingers digging into your skin, his tongue dragging on your neck, “Please.” You ushered out a small moan. 

Jungkook’s hand’s suddenly grabbed your waist, “Hold on,” He said and you didn’t understand for a moment until he suddenly picked you up, bringing you out of the water, grabbing one of the towels from off the stool he laid it out on the bed to not get it wet before dropping you down. 

The fire crackled on, the only light source in the room, leaving it dark and warm, but the silhouette of Jungkook’s body was still very evident, his hard cock even more so as he stood tall in front of your figure. 

You felt so small in comparison in this moment, but it didn’t last long as Jungkook leaned down, “You’re so perfect.” He whispered, lips pressing into yours as if he could sense your anxiousness, your body was so pliable though, having his hovering over you protectively. You moaned into the kiss, body relaxing as one of his hands found your thighs, pushing them apart tenderly as you opened them for him.

Your cunt was throbbing and wet, eager to be touched by him as Jungkook broke the kiss, letting his tongue drag down your throat and to your collarbone before he feathered more kisses, pausing at your breasts. 

Jungkook couldn’t resist wrapping his lips around your left tit, this forced a moan from you, hips shifting in need as a hand steady them, as if telling you to be patient, he traded for your right tit next, moaning softly against your skin as if relishing in it. 

“Jungkook…!” You whined softly, watching the explicit sight, your thighs spreading a little more in need. 

Jungkook’s eyes almost glowed in the dark, that icy blue piercing gaze, hazy and filled with lust as he released your tit from his lips, a small lazy smirk tugging on his lips, “Yes, my love?” 

It felt like knots were forming in your stomach, “Love me, you keep saying it, show me how it feels.” 

Jungkook gave you a small smile, “You don’t need to ask me twice.” His lips pressed down your stomach and your body was reacting in all the ways he could hope as he made his way down to your hips, tenderly, slowly, licking up every reaction he got before he settled himself between your thighs. 

Still he seemed to enjoy getting you worked up, lips pressing against your inner thigh making you squirm, your cunt dripping wet as you whined, “Jungkook!” 

His tongue dragged just a little closer to where you wanted it, “What do we say when we want something?” 

“Please…!” 

Jungkook moaned softly as his tongue pressed against your cunt making you let out a moan of relief, his hot wet tongue mixing with your arousal as he pressed against your little opening before dragging it up your slit, right where you wanted it. 

You moaned softly as his tongue pressed against your clit, you shifted onto your forearm, your other hand reaching down to bury in his wet dark locks of hair, his tongue swirling around the tender bud as pleasure shot through your body making your thighs open further for him.

His eyes closed as he moaned against your clit, wrapping his lips around it as if suckling something sweet, it made a sharp whine escape you as you yanked his hair hips lifting for him. 

“Mm Jungkook.” You ushered out softly as his lips parted, tongue lathing against the little bud that had you squirming in pleasure. 

“Relax my love,” Jungkook moaned into your cunt, “Let me make you cum as many times as you please.” 

His fingers snuck down to your cunt as his lips wrapped back around your clit making you whine, his tongue having found a particularly sweet spot that had you grabbing his hair.

His fingers toyed with your little hole at first, letting them get nice and sticky from your arousal before he pushed a digit in, your body immediately reacted, walls clenching around him as a strangled whine left you. 

His lips parted as his tongue lathed your clit, continuously flicking the sweet spot of your bud as you whimpered, your cunt throbbing in pleasure as his finger began to pump inside you, “Relax princess, I got you,” Jungkook’s lidded eyes met yours, and briefly you could see his finger, knuckle deep in your cunt. 

As if noticing this as well a small smirk curled on his lip as he pulled it out, before gathering both his middle and ring finger, pushing it back inside you, it made you wince a little in discomfort, “Shh, give your body to me, I’ll take care of it my love,” Jungkook moaned softly, his cock was rock hard at watching you moan and wither beneath him in pleasure.

Your walls clenching tightly around his fingers as he thrusted them inside you, his lips tenderly pressing into your thigh to soothe you as your body slowly relaxed just as he said.

Your hips slowly lifted in sync with his as you whined, Jungkook buried himself back in your cunt once more, tongue lapping at your little clit, getting the exact reaction he had hoped. 

A loud cry escape you, thighs suddenly wrapping around his head just the way he wanted them too, wanting to be suffocated by your cunt and nothing else, his fingers immediately began pumping rougher inside you as you whined unable to keep yourself supported anymore as you collapsed back against the bed. 

“Koo! Mmm! Please Koo!” Your words were mumbled and whiny as his tongue viciously swirled and suckled your throbbing bud, his fingers suddenly lifting inside you as if in search for something. 

Pleasure was becoming more consistent, more intense as Jungkook's moan vibrated against your clit and his fingers pushing all the way inside you as they lifted once more, the pleasure that suddenly snapped through your body was indescribable, a loud whimper escaping you. 

His name came in shambled shorter variations as you whined and moaned, your walls rapidly squeezing around his fingers as he kept thrusting into the same spot again and again.

Jungkook kept lapping at your clit, finding that sweet spot once more as you withered beneath him, back arching as your mind blurred with pleasure, “Oh..! Oh god, please! Yes! Mmm!” 

Your voice echoed throughout the bedroom loudly as fits of moans  escaped your mouth, lips parted at just how good you felt, “Cum for me, cum all over my fingers sweetheart,” Jungkook moaned before his lips parted against your clit, lazily rubbing into that little spot as his fingers ruthlessly rubbed into that spot inside you. 

And you did. 

Your walls rapidly wrapped around his fingers as he kept shoving them inside you, his tongue attached to your bud, milking your orgasm as unholy noises escaped your lips, mixtures of thanks, of his name, cries to the empty sky. 

It just kept going, the pleasure only heightened as you squealed out, hands digging into his hair as his tongue swirled over your clit, fingers refusing to stop as they hit that same spot inside you over and over again. 

It had your eyes rolling to the back of your head, your thighs trembling as you completely gave your body up to him, relaxing into the building sensation inside your cunt as your walls kept squeezing around his fingers, his tongue not stopping on your clit as he suckled it once more. 

His tongue finding just the right spot as it all spiked once more, your moans were shaky and cried out as blind pleasure washed over you once more, cumming all over his fingers but not only that liquid suddenly spewing lewdly from your little hole. 

“Fuuck,” Jungkook moaned, lifting your hips suddenly as his fingers abused your little entrance, hitting that spot over and over again as your body withered against him, “Such a good girl.” 

His fingers finally pulled out of your cunt, your thighs trembling as he set you down, moaning as he kissed your thighs, hands dragging against your waist, “Fuck, I want you so bad sweetheart, wanna fill you up, wanna feel you cum all over my cock.” 

You were heaving deep breathes, trying to comprehend the pleasure you just experienced, you were hazy still as your hand tenderly combed through his hair, “Then do so…” You gazed at him, hazey and the darkness made it difficult to make out his expression, “You said you wanted me to be your wife, then make me your wife.” 

Jungkook’s gaze shot up to you as you weakly smiled, “I want you to be my husband, but we’ve never consummated it. I want to.” 

Jungkook moaned softly, his cock throbbing as he crawled up to you, arms hovering on either side of you as he stared down at you, “You mean it?” 

“Of course I do,” You whispered, hands creeping up his neck and back to his hair once more, pulling him down for a kiss that he would never deny you. 

Jungkook moaned softly into the kiss before he broke it, pressing a kiss against your neck, “It’ll hurt,” He whispered, “But I’ll make sure it doesn’t last long.” 

Jungkook shifted you further up the bed as he sat on his knees, between your thighs as you parted them for him, feeling nervous, but you felt so safe with him, you wanted him, craved him. Jungkook’s fingers brushed over your cunt, puffy and wet as you shuddered. 

His hand was soaked in your arousal as before he wrapped it around his cock, just as big and fat as you remembered. His eyes didn’t leave yours as he pumped his cock in his hand, it made you feel shy as you shifted beneath him. 

“Are you sure?” He murmured, you nodded. 

Grabbing your thighs he pulled you closer to him before he grabbed his cock once more, rubbing the fat weeping head of his cock against your cunt as you let out a shaky exhale, you knew he was big but…he was really big compared to you.

Just the size of his head was nearly as big as your cunt itself, “Jungkook I don’t…-”

“It’ll fit.” He reassured, a little amused, pulling the head of his cock to your little entrance before attempting to push it in. 

You winced in pain as you shifted, you weren’t sure how you expected this to go, it really wasn’t something you had ever fantasized about. But the first attempt was lackluster due to the fact that he indeed was not getting it in.

Jungkook’s nose wrinkled, “Ugh fuck. Hold on,” He whispered, shifting a little more, setting your thighs a top of his a little more, lining his cock back up to your entrance as he pushed once more. 

He pushed the fat head of his cock against your entrance once more, this time however, you let out a yelp, the sensation almost burning as you shifted in discomfort against him, “Ah…! Fuck that hurts.” You let out a weak whine, biting down on your lip hard. 

And it did, all you could focus on was how much it ached and burned having your walls pushed open by something so large and foreign.

Jungkook leaned down, arms on either side of you as he pressed feathery kisses into your neck, “I’m sorry, my love,” His whisper was strained, “Just let yourself relax, it won’t last long.” He let out a slight shaky moan as he pushed himself just a little deeper inside you.

You tried to let yourself relax as much as possible, but your brows were still pinching together and it was difficult for it to not hurt when he was just really that big. 

Jungkook suddenly pulled out of you making you sigh in relief, Jungkook pressed another comforting kiss against your neck as he pushed the head of his cock back inside, only this time, it wasn’t nearly as painful, a little discomfort of having something foreign inside your body. 

But it wasn’t nearly as bad, Jungkook’s muscles were completely tensed and his breath was shaky as he buried his face into your neck with a moan, “Fuck sweetheart, you feel so fucking good wrapped around me.” 

Jungkook his deep raspy words in your ear made your walls squeeze around him, making him push a little deeper inside you as you let out a soft whine, shifting your hips as if trying to take more of him. 

Jungkook could feel this, immediately pushing his cock deeper inside you, “Oh my god,” He whispered, “Fucking perfect, perfect cunt, perfect body, perfect for me. Look at that little cunt, taking me so well.” 

You whined at his hips thrusting a little, as if testing the water’s, “Koo…mmm!” Your eyes snapped shut at feeling his cock splitting your walls open, hitting all the right places.

Jungkook moaned as his hips slowly began to thrust, his cock still not fully inside you but with each thrust it got a little closer, “Feels so warm, so little, fuck, keep wrapping around me like that love.” 

His shaft rubbed right into that sweet spot that had you moaning, legs wrapping around his waist, your cunt felt so full and yet wanted so much more, Jungkook’s hips were becoming a little faster, “Such a perfect cunt, mine. All mine.” There was a hint of possessiveness in his words. 

Your hands dug in his hair, “All yours.” You whimpered out quietly as your body started jolting, his hips becoming rougher at the words, “Your cunt, yours.” 

Jungkook let out a rough moan, deep and raw as if those words made him all hot and bothered, “Fuck yeah it is,” He suddenly growled in your ear, “You’re my fuckin’ wife, my cunt to play with, my cunt to make cum again and again. Mine.” 

You suddenly whimpered at feeling his cock going deeper inside you, your eyes shutting as you moaned for him, knowing he wanted to hear them, knowing how much he liked to see you in pleasure, “Mmm! Like that.” 

“Oh? Like this?” He smirked against your skin as he thrusted particularly harsh, his cock going deep inside you once more, your walls rapidly clenching around him as you moaned, nails dragging against his back. 

“What about this?” He murmured in your ear, pushing his hips all the way until they met yours, his cock completely buried in your warm little cunt as you shakily moaned, eyes squeezing shut at how deep he was inside, how thick and fat his cock was, completely splitting open your walls. 

“Mmm fuck, yeah.” You ushered softly, creaming all over his cock, arousal coating it as your walls squeezed around him, you had finally found heaven, it was Jungkook buried inside your cunt. 

Jungkook moaned as well, feeling how tight your walls squeezed around him in pleasure, as if suddenly starved Jungkook grabbed your thigh, bringing it over his shoulder as his hips shifted, rapidly thrusting into you as you yelped in surprise. 

But pleasure was immediately blooming side you, his shaft rubbing all the right spots, balls slapping against your skin as you whimpered for him, “Oh! Right there, yeah! Yes, god…!” 

Jungkook moaned, “Fuck yeah, squeeze around me baby, know you wanna cum on it, cum all over this fat cock, gonna fill you up until your dripping.” 

Your hips lifted with his, moaning at how good it felt, his cock roughly dragging in and out of you, pushing your walls open with each thrust, “Mmm wanna cum all over it.” 

Jungkook moaned, thrusting particularly hard this time making you whine before he suddenly shifted, letting go of your thigh as he suddenly sat up right, but dragging you with him, his cock pulling out of you as you whined. 

Thighs trembled and uncertain of this new position as Jungkook sat you in his lap, immediately grabbing his cock as he pushed it back inside you, except you were a little awkward, “Mm Koo I don’t-”

“Like this love.” Jungkook moaned, grabbing your hips as he lifted them, this new position made you feel him in an entirely new way, your lips parting as an involuntary moan escaped you, trying to mimick the way his hips guided you. 

Sliding down his cock as you moaned, feeling how deep he was inside you, your walls rapidly clenched, Jungkook’s hands tightened around your ass, “Fuck yeah sweetheart, can feel you wrapping around it, cum.” His head suddenly dove down, lips parting on your right tit as he suckled it harshly making you cry out, walls clenching around him as you lowered your hips all the way down. 

Your arousal dripping on his balls as he lifted you, fucking you on his cock as you whined pathetically, not of much use when he fucked you like this, his lips suckled your tit harshly once more, “Cum,” He growled, his hand suddenly smacking your right ass cheek making you yelp. 

Your body however, loved that feeling of pain, your cunt squeezing around his cock as he roughly bounced you on it, “Like that? Like getting spanked sweetheart?” Jungkook grinned deviously, suddenly smacking your ass even harder, your body reacting to it as your walls clenched harder around him. 

“Mmm! M’ gonna cum..Koo!” You whimpered out, all the sensations overwhelming you as Jungkook continued to bounce you on his cock, pushing you deeper on him as he smacked your ass once more, this time hitting just under the cheek, the pain mixed with the pleasure as you moaned loud, walls squeezing rapidly around his cock. 

Your lips parted as you came all over his fat shaft, being bounced roughly as Jungkook moaned, “Fuck yeah, thats it princess,” Jungkook moaned, wrapping his around around your waist as he laid back on the bed, bring you with him a top as his hips lifted, rapidly thrusting up inside you, this orgasm was much deeper, more powerful as he continued to bottom out inside you making sure he was completely buried inside you.

“Fuck my love, that’s it.” Jungkook ushered a moan, you felt it before you heard it, something indescribably warm shooting deep inside your cunt, “Mm that’s it, take it like the good girl you are.” 

You let out the tiniest whine, burying your head in his shoulder as he let out a deep sigh of contentment, relishing in his orgasm, how long had he imagined holding you like this?

His lips tugged into a lopsided smile as his eyes opened, looking at you as if you were the only thing in the world, as if in deep admiration, love.

You supposed that look in his eyes, could only be described adequate as love, “My goddess,” He mused, fingers trailing your face, his hand trailed down your side before grabbing your hand, the skin discolored in large patches. 

Jungkook pressed his lips against the palm before tenderly planting a kiss on each finger, the gesture was so full of love it made your eyes fill with tears that did not shed, his lips pressed against your wrist, “The love of my life, I know I cannot change the past,”

Jungkook laid you both on your side as he wrapped his arm around you, “But we will get through this together.”

You weren’t sure what it was, the earnest look in his eyes, the pure devotion in his voice, but you believed him, you wholeheartedly believed him, “We will.” You whispered back, leaning in to press your lips against his.

It was filled with nothing but sweetness, tenderly pressing over yours as he let out a soft moan, his hand finding its home around your neck, not squeezing but simply holding it, “My wife.” He moaned against the kiss, “My beautiful wife. I don’t think there will ever be a day I don’t love you. Sleep, and if you wake, I’ll be here to hold you.” 

Sleep did not come easily, Jungkook had managed to get you both under the warm covers, scaring off whatever little coldness that had tickled your skin, the last hour before he fell asleep had been silent, his fingers tracing circles against your back, enjoying one another's warmth. 

You had eventually fell asleep but dreams you could not remember had plagued you back awake, your eyes were tired but you could see blue light streaming in from the window, it wouldn’t be long before your day would begin. 

Still, you laid dozing off enjoying your Jungkook who hadn’t let go of you the whole time, skin to skin contact soothing, you had rolled onto your stomach, letting the weight of his body near on top of you soothe your eyes back shut. 

Shifting a little to get comfortable this must have accidentally awoke him as you felt a gentle kiss press on your shoulder a sleepy groan escape his lips, “How long have you been awake?” He mumbled, his voice quiet, deeper and raspier than normal. 

“...Not too long, I’ve woken up multiple times though.” You whispered, keeping your eyes shut as you felt his hand slowly stroke your waist. 

You would never say it out loud, but you could definitely get use to being petted like this.

“You should’ve woke me up,” Jungkook pressed another kiss against your skin, this time your neck, “Let us lay together in silence.” 

“We could be laying in silence right now.” You offered a tiny tired smile though you weren’t sure he could see it. 

“We could.” Jungkook murmured, his lips pressing onto your neck once more, this time parting as his tongue tenderly lapped over your skin, the act itself made your breath hitch, body stirring as you tilted your head, letting him have more access to your skin. 

You kept your eyes closed, allowing him to give you open mouthed kisses over your neck, not too long in each spot to be mindful of marking, his tongue delicately tracing over each patch just enough to tease. 

It seemed he finally got what he wanted out of you, a tiny moan as he shifted you both, now spooning you, your bare ass promptly snug against his hard cock, his lips suckling the skin of your neck as his hand snaked over your waist, grabbing a handful of your tit as he pinched your nipple. 

You whined as you rubbed back against him a little, this made his hand immediately grab your hip, squeezing it to stay still before it hooked over your thigh to lift it, your cunt glossy and wet, dried cum staying your thighs no doubt. 

Your face felt hot and flush and suddenly the covers that had kept you warm were like an inferno, Jungkook shifted, grabbing his cock as he let his fat weeping head rub along your puffy slit. 

A small breath escaped you as he rubbed it over your sensitive clit before back to your little entrance, and then pushing it in, your brows pinched together in discomfort, his size still big for your body to adjust too. 

“Shhh,” He whispered against your neck, moaning softly as his hips started thrusting, his cock pushing further inside you as you whined, “Fuck, can’t believe this pussy is all mine,” Jungkook ushered quietly, “Mine to fuck, mine to love, mine to cum inside. Mine.” 

You moaned against the pillow, your walls squeezing tight around his cock as he thrusted further inside you before pushing all the way in, his shaft rubbing just the right way inside you, “Mmm, Jungkook.” You moaned quietly. 

You could feel his wicked smirk on your skin, hips suddenly thrusting rough up into you, his cock throbbing as his balls smacked against your skin, “Moan my name, only mine. Want everyone to hear, to know how good I fuck you.” 

You bit down on your lip at his hips thrusting at a steady but rough pace, each time pulling almost out of you only to shove all the way back in, the fat head of his cock hitting that sweet spot inside you each time. 

“That's right sweetheart, cream all over it, wanna feel this pretty little cunt cum all over my cock,” Jungkook moaned in your ear, that deep rasp in his voice had your clit throbbing and your walls wrapping around him as you whined. 

Overwhelmed by how big he was, how good it felt you nearly cried out at the feeling of his cock pulling out of you, your muscles tensed as your eyes snapped open at being robbed of your pleasure. 

Jungkook had a sleepy smirk on his face as he sat upright against the headboard, pulling the covers off to reveal his fat, proud cock, glossy with your arousal as he offered you a hand, “Come sit on your throne my goddess.” 

Your body felt hot in all kinds of ways as you took his hand before slowly crawled to him, Jungkook however manhandled you to sit on his lap, your back pressing into his chest as he pried your thighs apart, the position was all too familiar as you whined. 

“Jungkook…!” 

“Remember what I said last time?” Jungkook pressed a long kiss against your neck, shifting you as he grabbed his cock, gleaming coated in your arousal as he pushed the head back inside you, an audible moan from you echoing in the room as you watched in arousal and horror at how much he was splitting your cunt. 

Your body could do nothing but sink down on it, whines and whimpers escaping you once again at just how thick his cock was, finally meeting the base as your body rested against his, Jungkook however had different plans, grabbing your thighs to lift them a little as he suddenly starting thrusting. 

His fast pace took you off guard as you gurgled a moan, eyes unable to look at anything except his cock pulling in and out of your cunt, covered in slick arousal as you felt his shaft squeezing past your soft warm walls each time, hitting up into your sweet spot that had you moaning. 

“You like watching?” Jungkook grinned, a breathy moan escaping him as his chin rested on your shoulder, eyes hazy as he watched his cock push all the way inside you, “Like being made to take this big fat cock while being made to watch.”

Jungkook’s eyes squeezed shut at how hard your walls suddenly clenched around him, taking everything in him to not cum this very moment, “You’re so fucking little,” He groaned, fingers digging into your thighs, “Love feeling that pretty little cunt wrap around me, heh yeah like that fuuck.” 

His fingers found your clit rubbing them as you yelped out, walls rapidly clenching around him in a feeling that he was quickly starting to familiarize himself with, it made his cock throb in pleasure as he lifted once more, shifting you both a little so you laid back more against his chest, thrusting harder and faster this time as he pressed your clit between his fingers. 

“Mmph! Koo-! Fuck, ah! Yes! Oh god, like that, please! Please!” Moans escaped you incohesively, surrendering your body to him as he fucked you roughly, hips snapping up into yours, his cock stretching out your walls each time. 

Jungkook’s fingers toyed with your throbbing clit, “Thats it, moan, let them know who’s taking care of this pretty pussy, who’s filling you up with cock right now,” His hips drilling into you as he watched his cock snap in and out of your cunt each time, “Look, watch.” He growled in your ear. 

Your eyes opened as you moaned, your cunt puffy and wet, stretching for him with more ease now than before, Jungkook’s hips slowed down, “You like watching yourself get fucked?” 

Your throat felt dry and your body hot as his hips sensually moved, slower, deeper, making sure you felt every thrust of his hips as his cock buried deep in your cunt, “Answer.” 

“Yes,” You stammered, whining a little at his cock burying inside you once more but this time not pulling out immediately after, “Like watching.” You whined quietly. 

Jungkook had a wicked grin on his lips, “You like it? Being fucked by the wicked prince?” His thrusts were short, keeping his cock as deep inside you as he could, your walls clenched at the short snapped sensation, “Like it when I cum deep inside this pretty virgin cunt of yours?”

Pleasure was building rapidly in your body, your walls squeezing tightly around him each time, watching his long thick fingers rub into your clit, finding that sweet little spot that had you gasping a whine.

“Yes, yeah, fuck, mmm! Fuck Koo, gonna…!” Your body was contorting as his cock pushed all the way inside you once more.

“I remember that little mouth of yours our wedding night, remember wanting nothing more then to bend you over and stuff you full of cock,” Jungkook moaned, hips becoming sloppy, thrusts uneven, some slow, some rough, “Fuck you so hard all you’d be able to do was thank me. But look at you now.” 

Jungkook smiled against your shoulder, “My pretty wife letting me fuck her tiny little cunt, letting me ruin the little virgin dryad princess. Fuck yeah, that’s it, cum all over it my love. Cum all over this cock.”

You were moaning so loud, surely people out in the halls could hear, and it only turned Jungkook on further, his cock buried inside you with the need to make sure you kept moaning, needing others to hear, to know that you were his. 

His thrusts were short, keeping buried deep in your cunt as his fingers kept rubbing into the sweet spot of your clit, your walls rapidly clenching around his base as he buried into you once more before you came. 

Jungkook let out a loud moan as your walls squeezed him so tight he was unable to thrust, pleasure was contorting in every part of your body as you came all over his cock just as he wanted, your clit throbbing in pleasure as Jungkook tenderly rubbed into it, milking every last bit of pleasure he could.

“God I love the way your cunt wraps around me,” He murmured, eyes tightly shut at the sensation, what he had dreamed of for so long now, the feeling of your cunt squeezing tight around him, begging to be filled with his cum. 

The feeling was still foreign, having something warm and slightly sting as it roped inside you, his hands squeezing your thighs tight as he came, moaning softly in your shoulder, you both were heaving breathes.

Jungkook pressed a flutter of light kisses against your neck, fingers tracing your thighs, is fingerprints still prominent in them, “So that’s what you meant…” 

“Hm?” Jungkook hummed out, nose nudging your neck in a loving manner, his fingers tracing over the skin that was slowly discoloring. 

“You…once told me bruising could be attractive, is this what you meant?” You whispered, voice raspy a little humored. 

You could feel the tiny smile on your neck, “Maybe. Maybe not, do you find it attractive?” 

“Do you?” 

Jungkook’s fingers continued to trace over the marks, “When they’re mine,” He pressed a kiss against the shell of your ear, “They’re the most attractive.”

You had gotten distracted though, his cock slipping out of you and cum oozing from your entrance you squirmed in discomfort, your face felt warm at the lewd sight.

“Mmm, that’s even more attractive though,” Jungkook moaned softly, his index finger scooping it back up before pushing it back in making you squirm.

“Jungkook…!” You whined out, immediately closing your legs.

He chuckled as he pressed a kiss against your head, “Let me grab a washcloth and get you cleaned up.” 

Jungkook shuffled you out of his lap before standing up with a groan, grabbing his undershort that had never gotten worn last night as he put them on, grabbing a washcloth from the stool, walking back over to bed where you had shuffled, suddenly feeling incredibly exposed as you sat naked on his bed.

It didn’t matter if you both had just finished laying together and his cum dripped between your thighs. 

Jungkook looked down at you for a long moment before a smile curled on his lips, “Are you going to let me see?”

“I…can clean myself.” You replied flustered, unable to look at those pretty blue eyes of his. 

“What kind of partner would I be if I made you do that?” Jungkook snorted, grabbing your legs as he pulled you closer, it made you squeak now at the edge of the bed.

You thighs parting only a little for him, but he had quickly made it more as he pulled them further apart, his tongue grazing his lips at the sight before the warm wet cloth dragged over your thighs, his hands were attentive and gentle as he cleaned you up. 

Jungkook had gotten himself halfway dressed and had just gotten your slip on just in time for the timely knock on the door, Taehyun’s voice on the otherside.

Jungkook had allowed him to come in, bowing to you both before going to Jungkook’s wardrobe, “Would you like for me to send for a maid to help the Princess?” Taehyun asked, you could tell he had to have known something was up but obviously not about to ask. 

“No,” Jungkook replied, leaving your side as he walked over to Taehyun, “I’ll help her get ready for the day.” 

Taehyun said nothing more aside from going over the duties Jungkook would need to attend today as he got him dressed, you had fidgeted in bed, eyes glancing at the window as light began to filter in, brighter than usual. 

You would be expected to carry out your duties today as well, the rebuilding of the market had slowed down since winter had approached and Jeong Dae had warned you the building would be very slow in the winter, but to be patient. 

You also had to meet with a few noble houses today to discuss resources once more, just the idea exhausted you. It had been nearly a week since the incident and yet it felt as though a day hadn’t past. 

You hadn’t even noticed when the door had been shut. 

“You’re in your head again.” Jungkook frowned, staring down at you, fully dressed in black today.

“So much has happened since we married,” You frowned as you looked at the window once more, “It’s difficult to not these days.” 

You parted your lips but no words came, uncertain of how to express your feelings, Jungkook patiently waited as he turned away from you walking to your wardrobe, most of your clothes had been taken out, but evidently he had somehow managed to keep most of your winter wardrobe here. 

“I knew it would be difficult, when we married and I would move here, leaving my land behind. I had two years of mental preparation for what may happen,” You sighed softly as you glanced at your hands, flipping them over to look at your discolored palms, “I had mainly prepared myself to be killed here. And yet…somehow, it never occured to me that living might possibly be worse. That living and yet, unable to recognize myself, would be a thousand times worse than death.”

You felt alienated from yourself, perhaps deep down you always knew you were capable of murder, the rage so deep in your bones that certainly it would strike a god down, but to have done it? 

To go against everything your nation stood for? The oath you had so proudly taken as a little girl, your mothers eyes beaming down at you with pride. 

Jungkook set the material out on the bed he had gathered before kneeling down in front of you, gently taking your hands in his, “Or perhaps this is just another side of you, something different, something new, change is uncomfortable. Growth is painful. I remember my first time…” 

Your eyes slowly moved, meeting his as he frowned, “I was nothing more than a child, holding a sword too big, he was a grown man. It was one of our drill sergeants in training, he had despised the Jeon name and had taken to treating me as nothing more then dirt beneath his boots.”

Jungkook sighed, “He had been ruthlessly sparring with me, going as far as kicking me into the ground well past my attempt of surrender. And then he stopped, and just stared at him before laughing, saying I was pathetic, that I’d never live a day in battle. And like that he just turned his back and walked away.” 

Jungkook’s eyes dropped, “I don’t even know what possessed me, but he kept laughing as he called out to his little friend that he was done with the Jeon Scum, suddenly I had unsheathed the dagger in my hand and ran at him.” 

“And?” You whispered out.

Jungkook shrugged, “I don’t remember much of it anymore, I’ve been told I stabbed him over fourteen times though, I was covered in blood by the end of it and I only remember crying in the bathtub while washing myself.” 

Your heart painfully squeezed for him, he couldn’t have been older than ten? Nobody would ever be fit to kill, let alone a child, “Were there consequences?” 

Jungkook shook his head, “Areum had given me a light slap on the wrist, extra watch duty, less rations, things of that nature. But being the prince gave me certain privilege,” He a bitter smile grew on his face, “I think that was the first time my father ever told me he was proud of me. Said I had great promise on the battlefield and that I was meant to rule.” 

“You say it with such disdain.” You frowned. 

Jungkook sighed as he stood up, grabbing the dress he had picked out for you, a purple dress with long thick velvet sleeves, the material was sheer and thin but he had grabbed a thick under slip to pair with it. 

Jungkook pulled the slip over your head, “Do you want my honest words on it?” 

“Of course I do.” You whispered out, eyes meeting his as he pulled the material down. 

“I’ve never had the desire to rule,” Jungkook said it no more than a whisper, “I don’t want the crown, I don’t want to be king.” He ushered it as if it was a crime, but suddenly he looked a little relieved as if this was the first he had ever voiced it, “I don’t want those responsibilities that come with it…”

Jungkook held your dress in his hands as his brows furrowed, “...I don’t want to be like my father.”

He spoke it as if that was the underlying reason, you stood up in front of him before wrapping your arms around his waist to hug him, “You’re nothing like him.” You whispered out, his hands wrapping around you as he squeezed you tight, nose burying in your hair. 

Jungkook broke away only a little as his forehead pressed against yours, “But then I think about you, crown on top of your head, the way you visit the outer districts, redistribute what's left that the royals waste, how you sacrificed something so sacred to you…” His hand grabbed your own, pulling it towards his lips as he pressed a kiss against your palm, “And I think about how you were made to be a queen, and if I were to rule by your side…then maybe it wouldn’t be so bad.” 

“Truthfully?” You whispered back, looking up at him with a soft smile, “It doesn’t matter to me, as long as I’m with you.”

Jungkook only smiled, fingers tracing your neck as he gave a flutter of kisses to the palm of your hand before he let go of you, grabbing the gown as he helped you change, tentatively lacing the back of your dress before turning you around. 

A sort of satisfied look on his face as if he had made the right choice, “Leave your hair down today, it looks nice like this.” 

“Jungkook…” You gave him a look, you felt incomplete if you didn’t have your hair braided or styled at all. 

“Indulge me today.” Jungkook replied with a sort of saccharine dripping off his tongue you had never heard before, pulling the velvet gloves over your hands.

You hated how much he had so easily convinced you as you sighed, shaking your head, “Very well, anything else.” 

He nodded walking to your jewelry box once more, “I didn’t say anything, but it didn’t mean that I didn’t notice.” Jungkook walked back over to you, gently grabbing your left hand lifting it up as he held out the large black ring, your wedding ring, “Wear it with pride.” 

Jungkook slid it on your ring finger making you smile as you glanced down at it, you had worn it a few times in the past, but it felt different letting him put it on you.

Your lips slowly fell though, “...I’m not ready for today.” You whispered out, Jungkook had been completely taken you away from your sickening thoughts for the last twelve hours, and soon you would have to return to reality. 

Jungkook frowned as his fingers traced along your neck, “It’ll be over soon my love.” He ushered quietly before leaning in, pressing a chaste kiss against your lips, your eyes closing as you leaned into his warm touch, fingers curling around your throat as you let out the softest moan. 

Jungkook refused to let this go further though, letting his hand drop as he broke the kiss, “If the day gets hard, you know where to find me.” 

Your day had become tones of gray, monotonous without having even realized it, your mind was elsewhere and nobles had looked at you with mixed reactions, some in fear, some in disgust. After all, they had all seen you, seen what you had done, what you were capable of.

You had been hold up in the library the last hour and a half though, reading up on some of the policies for building that had a headache beginning to turn up in your head.

Flipping the page you had went to drink your tea only to find it ice cold, the fire crackled at the far end of the library, but here in the nook you had found it towards the window was cold. 

Time had passed more than you had realized when you found your husband standing at the front of the table, looking at you expectantly. 

You glanced up from your book, “Are you finished with your duties already?” He usually worked later than this.

Jungkook’s nose wrinkled, “I’ve been done for over an hour, it’s nearing seven Y/n.” 

Your eyes widened as you glanced out the window, realizing it was dark outside before you looked back at him, “I’m sorry I didn’t even realize…”

Jungkook rounded the table, fingers dragging to your book before shutting it, “Enough of burying yourself in work.”

You frowned before you glanced up at him, “Do you have something in mind for us then?”

“Dinner,” Jungkook replied with a tilt of his head, “But first come, we should check on Fenrir and…you’ll enjoy the walk.” 

You took the hand he offered you before hooking onto his arm as you both walked down the hall, it was a quiet night but the glances maids and nobles alike didn’t surpass you, the looks never went away. 

You tried your best to ignore them as you entered to the courtyard, lips parting as you both stepped out.

Large fluffy snowflakes fell from the sky, almost shimmering against firelight as they softly landed on the ground, small piles of powder already forming as you looked around, enchanted at the sight, “It’s snowing…!” Your lips twisted into a smile, “I’ve never seen snowflakes so large…” 

Jungkook’s eyes softened on you as he smiled, “I figured so, it’s our first of many snowfall to come this winter. I thought you might like to see it.” 

Jungkook had led you down to the stables but your eyes were still captivated by the sky, filled with little white puffs that gracefully landed onto the ground, a loud whine however brought you back as you frowned. 

“Oh my sweet boy,” You ushered out softly at the sight of seeing Fenrir limp towards you, large tail wagging behind him as you reached out for his face, tenderly rubbing his snout before planting a kiss atop his head, “I’m sorry I haven’t visited you today.” 

“I saw him this morning, I let him loose while watching the guards spar,” Jungkook said, “He’s healing, by the time we travel for Yule he’ll be good as new.” 

He reached out, giving a firm pat to Fenrir’s side, “We’ll be taking him with us?” You glanced back at him in surprise. 

“Wolves will be roaming for food no doubt by the time we leave, it would be most safe to have him with us to scare off any predators.” Jungkook replied with a nod, “...He’s also bound to you, the grief he’d give royal staff would be something I’d never hear the end of from my father.” 

You gave him a guilty smile, “I wouldn’t want to part with him either.” Fenrir had managed to lick your face causing a quiet giggle to escape you as you leaned away from him, lovingly stroking his neck. 

You had gone inside his pen to straighten out his blankets and to pull out one more thicker one, now that it was snowing you were certain the winter nights would be long and cold, you truly did wish the castle would let him stay inside. 

After spending a few minutes with Fenrir you let out a soft sigh, wishing to not have to depart from him so soon, but your duties had kept you all day, and tomorrow would most likely not be much better. 

Fenrir as if sensing this let out a whine, his ears flattening against his head and his tail fell, “Don’t look like that,” You whispered out, your heart aching for him as you rubbed his ears, “I’ll be back tomorrow, and maybe Jungkook will let you out again.”

“We’ll see,” Jungkook replied neutral, “Inside Fenrir.” 

It was a soft command the Fenrir hesitated to listen too, “Inside.” Jungkook repeated more firm making the wolf whine once more as he went back into his pen, making circles before he laid down, another high pitched whine escaping him. 

“I’ll be back soon.” You whispered before kissing his head once more, closing his gate as you tried to not let his whines make you sad. 

Jungkook had extended his elbow out to you once more as you took it, sighing with a frown as you gave the pen one last look, “It’s only a day, he’ll survive.” 

“I still don’t know why we can’t keep him in the castle…” Your words trailed off at the sight ahead. 

A silvery cloaked figured and…Wheein, bundled up in a green cloak, cheeks rosy pink from the chill as you both paused, it hadn’t been fair that you hadn’t even gotten to see her since she had been trialed. 

You had immediately left Jungkook’s side, “Wheein!” 

Tears filling your eyes as she met you halfway, “Y/n! I’m so, so incredibly sorry!” She whispered out as you both embraced, tears of joy, tears of relief, you weren’t sure, but seeing her in person, being able to tightly hug her. 

It had all suddenly rushed in your mind, that what you had committed, why you had done it, it wasn’t just for your own survival, but it was for the survival of someone else, your arms squeezed around her. 

You broke away from her, grabbing her hands in our own as you both looked at one another, Wheein immediately noticing your tiredness, “Are you okay?” She whispered out. 

“You were nearly executed, I should be asking you that.” You frowned. 

“But you…” Wheein couldn’t bring herself to say the words, the silence loud as you looked away from her. 

Your eyes dropped down to her own gloved hands before finally back at her, “You are alive, and so am I. I will be okay…with time.” 

“You should be at home resting with your family Wheein.” Jungkook had decided to step into the conversation, words softly reprimanding.

“I couldn’t stay away any longer, not after everything that has happened. I owe you both my life, and I wanted to give my thanks for all you have done for me. As well as…” Wheein frowned disapprovingly as she turned to the cloaked figure.

Taehyung. 

“I’ve heard about the ill-spoken words.” Wheein stared him down as she let go of her hands, taking a few steps back as she gestured the man over. 

Taehyung frowned, scratching his cheek as he shuffled in front of you, “What I accused you of Princess…I cannot take back my words, but all I can do is ask for your forgiveness.” 

You gaped as he dropped to one knee, bowing his head, “I spoke without thinking and let my emotions get the better of me.” 

“Taehyung…” You whispered softly, true his words had wounded you but you couldn’t entirely blame him, you had no idea what would do if Jungkook was in such a similar situation, “While your words hurt, being upset like that is understandable. We were all afraid of what would happen, I would never hold it against you.”

“Stand up Taehyung,” Jungkook spoke, his eyes not quite as kind as yours but it seemed he had a similar line of thought, “While your words were border treason…” He trailed off, glancing down at you briefly, “If the love of my life was also on death's doors, there’s no telling the hell I would raise. 

“Love of your life?” Wheein squeaked out, clearly embarrassed at the comparison, but it made a soft smile tug on your lips.

Taehyung bowed at this, “I won’t speak out of line again. I still hope to one day serve as your hand Your Highness.” 

Jungkook snorted, “We’ll see about that. Now you need to escort Wheein back-”

“With all do respect,” Wheein spoke up, a small shy smile on her face, “I would like to return from my leave early, I would like nothing more then to be back in service to the Princess once more.” 

Jungkook frowned disapprovingly but you had spoke before he did, “You are always welcomed to return Wheein, your company would be a light that I need right now.”

Jungkook sighed, “Very well, then return to your quarters for the night,” He began walking, pulling you along with him, “And we’ll see you in the morning.”

Snow fell quietly and you could hear the owls trill out, your heart feeling just a little more light, the road ahead would be only just as treacherous, but with Jungkook by your side, and the friends you had made. 

You could only hope it would be enough. 

#wicked

[ittomi]

wicked • 17

↳ Summary: In a desperate hope to stop war from breaking you are a serviced to wed the most vile man alive, the one who has committed atrocities and war crimes beyond comprehension, he who is responsible for the fall of many nations, the wicked prince who’s heart is made of stone. You are to marry a man who challenges every belief and moral you stand for, all while being faced in a foreign land with nobody but yourself too trust…But are you both truly that different? Or is hate not too far from love?

↳ Pairing: Jungkook/reader

↳ Genre: arranged marriage AU, enemies to lovers, it’s kind of a period AU??? Historical but also technically not? prince!AU, eventual smut

Word Count: 8k

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Note: it’s actually difficult to believe it’s been eight months since I’ve updated, went through two jobs, a friend group and a boyfriend who gaslit the absolute fuck out of me and made me experience female hysteria 😍 I wrote this chapter the night he broke up with me so it just has that nice little extra touch of ✨ intensity ✨ enjoy lovies and I will be back hopefully sooner then last time with another update

It felt wrong, packing a small case of clothes while so many things at the castle had yet to play out, and Wheein’s life was hanging in the balance of it.

You had no intentions to trudge your way to the barracks but here you were; early morning where all of the guards were training and the person you were looking for was watching them, hands on his hips as he called out to one of them to tighten their guard.

You hadn’t planned on talking to him today, but leaving without so much as saying a word felt wrong, and perhaps after everything that had happened you were searching for sober reassurance.

“Jungkook.”

Everybody froze at the sound of your voice, you ignored all the eyes on you, after having lived in Penumbra for almost a year, you had somewhere along the way gotten used to all of the eyes that constantly followed you.

The guards exchanged awkward glances with one another, Jungkook looked surprised by your appearance, eyes glancing over you as if you were a hallucination, but after a moment it was evident you weren’t going to disappear upon blinking.

He glanced between you and the guards before he waved them off, “Keep going.”

You couldn’t stand the hopeful look in his eyes, almost a bit bashful as you walked in line with him further away from the barracks, “How can you expect me to leave the castle when Wheein is in a dungeon? And furthermore sending your aunt to try and reconcile with me?”

Jungkook frowned, “Well I doubted you wanted to see me after my drunk display- which truth be told I hardly remember anything I said, and It’s probably for the best that I don’t, Y/n…” He sighed as he stopped, “It was only a suggestion, it crossed my mind about the estate because truthfully I think you would like it there, and it would be safe,” His hands tenderly grabbed your shoulders as your lips curled in anger but you said nothing, “And I think it would be good for you to put all of this out of your head for a few days. I’ll continue to handle things here and if things change with Wheein trust that I’ll be able to take care of it.”

Your expression didn’t change as Jungkook frowned, “I would also like to remind you that she’s been one of my closest friends since I was a child. You’re not the only one who cares for her.”

You begrudgingly looked away from him but your expression softened, a stab of guilt surging through your stomach at the realization that he was very much right, “I know, I’m sorry I just-”

“Don’t be,” Jungkook replied, “You have a mean bite but I can appreciate your loyalty. I can’t undo the past but I want to make things right. I…” Jungkook paused, looking hesitant his eyes darting away from you and then back to you once more.

You offered no words forcing him to sigh, as if it was difficult for him to admit, “I want to be with you Y/n, not as two people amicable due to marriage or friends on uneasy terms…” He bit down on his cheek, unable to hold your steely gaze as his hand hesitantly reached out, tenderly stroking along your jawline, “I want more than that with you, I want all of the fire and all of the rage, I want the pain, the hardships. I want you, all of you, every flaw that makes you, you.”

You hadn’t even realized your eyes had blurred until his thumbs were tenderly pushing your tears away, “Is this a declaration?”

“It’s a promise.” Jungkook’s eyes held such a softness in them filled with something you still felt uncertain to assume, “You told me that you wanted to bear the deepest parts of yourself to me, all of your insecurities, the parts you don’t like about yourself, the parts you may even hate, so I am standing here to tell you to show me, show me all of it, and I will still take you as you are.”

He was saying many overwhelming words to you, but you knew he was dancing around the most important word, you could see it in his eyes, how it lingered on the tip of his tongue.

But something was stopping him from truly confessing it.

Perhaps even after all of these months, it was still too soon.

Evidently so given your circumstances.

“I don’t want you away from me,” Jungkook admitted, a frown slowly forming on his lips, “But if that’s what it takes, I would wait a lifetime if it meant your forgiveness, if it meant a second chance to be with you.”

“Is that why you’re willing to send me away?” You sniffled, “Otherwise you’ll continue to drink and wake me up in the middle of the night?”

“It wasn’t my finest moment,” Jungkook gave a weak smile, “But you can’t deny it got my point across didn’t it?”

Just his smile made something in you crumble, a vast desire to embrace him here and to forgive him, surely you could put this all behind you…?

But a bigger part of you didn’t want to rush this, you didn’t want to be complacent anymore, that was how you got into this situation, how you immediately jumped to Claudin’s offer rather than confide in the person you were married to.

It was such a raw feeling, you could feel it licking at your very soul, trying to tame your desire to throw all caution to the wind once more.

And for a brief moment you could feel Jungkook have the same reaction as you, as if it took every fiber in his being to not beg you to stay, you don’t know if you could stand your ground against him again if he came on as strong as he had last night.

“Just for a few days.” You whispered out as he frowned, giving you an understanding nod.

“You’ll love it there.” His hands finally let go of you, somewhat reluctantly.

And then it was silent for a long moment, tension still lingering in the air and both of you clearly hesitant.

“Then…I’ll see you in a few days.” You mumbled and Jungkook nodded once more. It felt like the ground was trying to engulf your feet as you turned around, feeling oddly empty at your goodbye, waiting for something that wouldn’t come.

What was it you had hoped for? A hug…?

Maybe a kiss…?

But then again, it felt as though you were no longer deserving of those things, Jungkook may have done things to hurt you but you had also done things to hurt him, how could you both love one another if you couldn’t trust one another first?

You wished Jungkook had reached out for you, to at least give you some form of affection before leaving, but he also knew this was true, and let you leave with no grief.

It left you feeling empty inside, but this was for the best.

You journeyed over horseback for the day, trying to leave your fretting heart behind as you nervously glanced back at the far away sight of the castle, what if something developed with Wheein?

You felt as though you were betraying her just by leaving, more than anything you were desperate to get her back, perhaps that was why Jungkook was sending you away, as if he sensed your desperation would only heighten the longer this went on.

Dare you say, he feared the worst might happen if you stayed.

Your grip tightened on your reigns, once more trying to put it out of your mind, taking a deep breath you took in the heady scent of the pine tree’s the surrounded you, the Estate was much closer to the mountains then you had anticipated, by midday you had journeyed far enough that snow had already reached the ground.

“Are you nervous?” Yoongi had slowed his horse down to ride next to you, his eyes however still scoured ahead for possible danger.

“What do you mean?” You frowned as you glanced at his back, hearing a branch snap as your eyes darted towards the left of him.

Your faithful companion Fenrir having accidentally broke the branch he had been carrying in his mouth the past hour he had grown fond of, a whine leaving him in disappointment as he picked up the bigger side.

“Journeying away from the castle during these trying times…” Yoongi glanced back at you, a frown of his own, “It can’t be easy leaving with everything that’s happened.”

You didn’t reply for a long moment, Yoongi slowed down to ride beside you as he curiously took in your expression.

It was silent for a long moment before you finally relented, “It is difficult, but…After a long night, I figured this was probably best. It seems like my involvement in things only tends to make them worse. And truthfully there's no telling what lengths I’d go to at this point to get Wheein back.”

“Oh?” Yoongi looked curiosity once more, “I didn’t realize you had such a taste for danger.”

His joke made a smile finally tug on your lips, “Neither did I before coming to Penumbra. It seems this kingdom has a way of bringing out the primitive nature in me. But then again, it seems people have always looked down on me when I think of it.”

“On you?” Yoongi scoffed in amusement, “Dryad Matron of Eunoia? It’s difficult to believe, you’re like a pillar of light to the commonwealth of Penumbra, it used to drive the Prince nuts during your engagement.”

“It did…?” You peered somewhat hesitantly at him.

This made Yoongi grin, “Oh yes, when news of your engagement first broke out it had the people ecstatic, it had him gagging every second he heard good things of you.”

“This is hardly making me feel better…” You winced, though a small part of you was amused to hear this, though you wish you could say the same.

It always seemed to you that people in Penumbra didn’t fully grasp just how much people feared them on the outside world, instead poking fun at the titles they had earned as if it was a little joke.

The whole two years of your engagement are two years you’d rather die then live through again, the anxiety that kept you up at night, the endless amounts of tears you cried, the emptiness it left inside you how no one even tried to comfort you.

Looking back you understood, nobody wanted to feed you lies to comfort you, but at the time, you didn’t understand, it felt cruel.

“Not everyone feels that way about me, evidently from what I saw in the Underside.” You replied, somewhat reminiscing on the horrendous memory of the mock version of you.

“You shouldn’t pay that any mind,” Yoongi scoffed, “The humor is juvenile there, everything it stands for is juvenile, even it’s name; the Underside was a joke, a mockery meant for every royal that has to say it’s name with seriousness, point being- they don’t respect anyone who won’t give them money.”

You only shook your head, “It’s not just that though, there has always been a small part of people and court alike who haven’t liked me, even long before I was engaged to Jungkook. I was known for having a temper,” It made you smile wryly, “-The Bitch of Eunoia, that’s what they ran around calling me behind my back. It was horrendous in Kimhae.”

“Was it now?” Yoongi looked amused by this, “That in some ways does, and doesn’t surprise me.”

“The court ladies in Eunoia often liked to call me that as well. But it was very pronounced by Kimhae court men. When I was younger, I used to wear traditional Eunoian attire when i’d visit. Apparently shoulders and knee’s used to drive them crazy. I had one of the aristocrats boldly ask me if I was an exotic woman of the night, willing to pay for me.”

Yoongi’s jaw had dropped making you laugh as he gestured you on, “What did you say?”

“Something along the lines of calling him a perverted old man whom ought to have his loins cut off for making such a comment to a women- let alone a Princess.” The memory made you smile as you shook your head, “The Bitch of Eunoia…why is it men are allowed to be angry Yoongi? Why is it women are shamed so?”

Yoongi let out a hum, “This is indeed a good question, but perhap it’s because they know a woman's scorn could even bring heaven out of the sky. I’m not all too surprised about Kimhae- but you said Eunoians called you this as well?”

Your smile became saddened, “By many court ladies yes,” You scratched your cheek in thought, “I was always lonely as a child…the war took a toll on me, I was temperamental and childish. But the court ladies as children, also liked to mock me and egg me on. As we grew older they grew closer and I still stayed a distance away. They’d find any reason to pick me apart or give me more work to do. They were practically leaping for joy when the news broke that I was engaged.”

“Why do you think that was though?” Yoongi asked, “That they didn’t like you?”

You shrugged, you had never really thought about it much, rather you preferred to keep the past where it was rather then dwell on it, “I suppose it had a lot to do with the fact that while we were all training to be healers I excelled more at it, it came naturally to me and they ended up putting me in the tents before the others. They all assumed it was from favoritism…Maybe it was,” You pondered on this briefly, “I just remember thinking it wasn’t fair.”

“Fair?”

You didn’t elaborate on the word for a long moment, feeling something akin to guilt bubble in your stomach.

You glanced off into the distance where the mountains towered high, it made you feel so tiny in comparison to its greatness, and briefly you felt awe.

You always admired nature, how vast it was compared to you and all your humanly troubles, you turned to it and it’s kin when you needed comfort and in these moments you could turn to it when you were also troubled with words.

It was difficult to adequately explain to people the rage you had felt since you were a child, anger had always been in your bones, from the moment you were born. Your mother used to tell you, that when she gave birth, you had come out of her womb with a roaring cry.

You craved to be vulnerable, to be soft and tender, to be all the things you were not, and you were many things, just not those.

Many people people heard you, they just never listened, didn’t understand.

“I had a lot of resentment as a child, to everything, the war, my parents, our country. I didn’t want to be a healer, I didn’t want to have to watch people in my care die, I didn’t want to attend the burnings or hear the whales of agony and pain, the cries of mourning, the people who blamed me for not being able to save their loved ones.”

You would be lying if you said you didn’t feel haunted by those memories, watching the lifeforce leave someone's body as you tried to stop the bleeding, the maimed limbs and mangled bodies that were beyond your skill or help.

“I didn’t want to be made to go past our lesson times to keep studying, or made to go back in to practice when all the other girls were allowed to play. Or put in a tent over night while they all slept. It wasn’t fair.”You mumbled, perhaps still a lingering tone of resentment.

The past was the past, it couldn’t be changed, you had come to terms with this, but if you stopped and really thought about it, old feelings old eventually begin to resurface, it was why you tried so desperately to just forget about it.

At one time you blamed Penumbra, you hated it’s people for what they did, what they caused.

But then you married Jungkook and you journeyed here yourself, and saw with your own eyes, that these people, were simply people, who were also victims of their own royalty.

You felt the soft grip of a hand on your shoulder, “I am sorry, for what it’s worth,” Yoongi held a face of sympathy, “We all felt the same, or…I suppose a mutual feeling on the opposite side of things. Children being forced to enlist into a war we didn’t want to wage with little choice…”

You gently grabbed his hand giving it a small squeeze, a weak smile on your face, “It wasn’t fair for any of us. We’re all a bi-product of our parents' sins. It’s up to us now to break that cycle.”

You had arrived to the estate by nightfall and it was shrouded in tall pine and fir trees, the aroma had you closing your eyes for a moment to savor it, just as Jungkook said, it truly was beautiful.

Snow covered the ground in a few inches, and a chill was left in your bones, but you settled in rather nicely, Yoongi had managed to get a fire going rather quickly and it was quiet in the solitude of the estate.

For once, it was nice to be able to breathe without being watched.

The first two days had went by surprisingly quick, but you had found a natural rhythm in nature, you went on long peaceful walks, kept yourself wrapped in a blanket while sitting on the terrace taking in the crisp cool air.

You had even spent the evening watching the snowfall outside, enchanted at how it came in big fluttering puffy balls, you had heard of snow before, but you had never actually seen it fall from the sky, like a thousand little gifts from the heavens.

It was dull and gray out today, the same as it had been for the last week now, at the estate was unsurprisingly no different.

Today however you had Yoongi set up some haybales in the pit area where guards would typically be trained, it was run down now, old boxes used as storage had been broken down and were hazardously strewn everywhere, long nine inch rusty nails sticking out of wooden pieces at razor sharp jagged angles.

But with Yoongi’s help you both had piled it up safely away and got a decent bit of space ready for training.

“Too stiff-”

“Ah!”

It was a second too late, you had already released the string, sending the arrow flying, it had veered off target as the string slapped your forearm with a sharp snap causing you to drop it.

Fenrir suddenly popped up from the ground where he had been laid out the last half hour, head cocked in concern at the noise that escaped you.

“How many times do I have to tell you,” Yoongi groaned, “You can’t hold it with a stiff arm! Look at this!” He got up from his spot as he held up your arm by the wrist, “It looks like somebody gave you a lashing! Jungkook will have my head if it isn’t heal by tomorrow.”

Your lips twisted into a sulky pout, “I am trying!”

“Not hard enough that’s the fifth time within the hour,” Yoongi whistled out as he let you go, Fenrir walking up to you as he sniffed your hand, giving it a lick before nudging it.

You rubbed your forearm, that was undeniably sore and throbbing with pain before placing your hand on Fenrir’s head to give it a nice long rub.

He had grown remarkably big in the last month, almost as big as you now, just a five or six inches shorter, it made you give a sad frown, at how big he was and soon he’d become a monstrous size…

You’d simply have to build a bigger stable you supposed.

“Aim comes naturally but holding a weapon does not,” You sighed as you placed both your hands on Fenrir’s head, now giving him generous rubs and pats that had him giving a toothy puppy grin that made you smile, “I’ve practiced here and there with a bow but with everything going on, I just haven’t made it a priority.”

Yoongi sighed, “Natural ability will only get you so far, discipline if a far greater advantage Princess, thankfully we can start working on this daily, I think it’d be good for you to have a hobby.”

“I have hobbies.” You frowned as crossed your arms.

“Such as…?” Yoongi gestured.

“Well…” You could think of several as a matter of fact, but you had given them all up once you had moved to Penumbra, the thought made you frown in realization, you had been so caught up in all the highs and lows of your new life that it was true.

You had hobbies, you just never participated in any of them.

“I suppose it would do me some good to work on it,” You sighed as you relented, “I still feel a tad guilty though, shouldn’t I be honing my skill in swordsmanship? Jungkook once told me that it’s expected the Crowned Prince and Princess are supposed to be the best at it.”

“Well…” Yoongi stretched the word, “This is true but, I don’t think somebody is going to fault you for not being the best at it. I’d like to think it’s an expectation from those born in Penumbra, not those who marry in. Not only this but if you are inclined to another form of weaponry, then it’s as simple as that.

“As long as you have some form of sword training then it’ll do,” Yoongi shrugged, “What matters is personal protection, some training is better then none, but having a form of training you’re good at is even better.”

“You Penumbrian’s certainly like taking precautions.” You sighed wistfully as you picked up your bow once more.

“The more the better,” Yoongi said, “Guards are great, but what happens when you’re caught without any? Learning to defend yourself is vital.”

You glanced down at your bow, “I understand but…”

“But?” Yoongi asked.

“Well, I suppose a part of me just feels odd,” You replied, “I grew up being taught to save lives, not take them,” You rubbed your neck in uncertainty, “When I took the Dryad’s oath, it was a promise to myself and my ancestors that I would abstain from our carnal nature. That I would never take a life nor would I consume its flesh. Animal or human. Even though the chances of me having to defend myself in such a way are so low, it’s odd to train for it, after taking that oath and living by it my whole life.”

Yoongi let out a small smile, “Then don’t view it as such.”

“What do you mean?” You tilted your head.

“Sword play is considered an art form in Penumbra, you can view a bow in the same light. It’s quite a beautiful thing really, it’s not just aiming and shooting, it’s how you hold it, the type of arrow you use, the weight of your feet. A lot goes into it.”

You thought on this for a while before nodding, “I suppose you are right.”

“Min Yoongi! I’m looking for a Min Yoongi?”

A voice called out that had you both glancing around the courtyard before seeing the courier at the gates glancing around before meeting his gaze.

“Yes?” Yoongi called out, walking up to meet him.

“I have a letter for you sire! It was urgent from the court” The courier dug through his bag before handing it to him, giving a short bow to you and then departing.

You glanced at it anxiously as you exchanged a look with Yoongi, was this about Wheein?

Yoongi opened the letter, reading it before he sighed,

“What, what is it?” You asked, anxiety in your voice.

“It’s not about Wheein,” You let out a breath in relief as Yoongi continued, “But it is a request for help.”

“What do you mean?” You asked.

Yoongi sighed, “There’s a watchtower just east of here, about an hour away give or take on horseback, apparently they’ve been dealing with a gang of bandits up there. Supposedly they’re going to siege the tower.”

“They can do that?” You asked in surprise.

Yoongi shrugged, “I suppose so, I don’t know what they think I can do about it.”

“Well you said you were an assassin before you became a knight? So surely that counts for something.” You said, setting down your bow on a lonely bale of hay.

Yoongi sighed as he folded the letter back up, “Even so, I won’t just leave you here by yourself.”

You frowned, “It’s only us here, and it’s secluded so I won’t be in any real danger, and you said it was only an hour away. I doubt you’d take long in taking them down.”

“Are you just trying to get rid of me?” Yoongi asked in mild amusement.

“I would never!” You said, “But I’d hate to see something unfortunate happen that could be prevented, you’re far closer then someone is to the castle. It would make the most sense for you to go.”

Yoongi sighed, “Even if I’m over cautious, it doesn’t sit right leaving you here all by yourself.”

“I wouldn’t be alone!” You replied, grinning as you gave Fenrir a solid pat, “Fenrir will defend me! Jungkook and I have been working on commands. Sit!”

Fenrir immediately complied.

“Very fierce.” Yoongi said dryly.

You held up a finger, grabbing a piece of wooden box that was free of any nails off the ground, “Fenrir,” He perked up at his name, “Attack!” You threw it causing his gaze to follow it with a loud snarling howl, his jaws crunching the board in half immediately grabbing the smaller end.

Running back to you before dropping down on his front paws, tail wagging as he tried to get you to chase him.

Yoongi looked a bit more startled at the thick board of wood that had been crushed as he nodded, “Okay, a little more fierce than before…” Yoongi thought about it for a long moment, “I suppose if I left now I would make it back by supper….Are you sure you’re okay with this?”

You gave him a small smile, “It’s only a few hours, I think I’ll be able to manage.”

Yoongi still seemed hesitant but he nodded, “I’ll go gather a few things then and be off. The sooner I leave the sooner I’ll be back.”

“It’s one night,” You smiled, “And then we’ll be back at the castle tomorrow.”

You had waved Yoongi off before you continued on with your day.

Spending another few hours training with your bow you had eventually given up once the string of your bow hit a particularly sensitive spot on your forearm.

The rest of your day had been spent taking walks along the trail’s with Fenrir before eventually settling inside, roaming the halls and exploring empty rooms.

And eventually the afternoon came.

But slowly the sun began to set and a vague feeling of dread followed along with it.

Yoongi…would’ve been back by now, right?

Or perhaps it took him longer to clear out the bandits.

You nodded at this as you stayed curled up in your large chair, Fenrir curled up beneath your feet as he let out a sigh, as if sensing your discomfort and unsatisfied with it.

Continuing to read, time went on and soon the sun had set.

You had managed to get a fire going on your own and had lit the candles in the hall, making the estate feel less consuming then it had before but it didn’t quell your anxiousness as the hour went on later.

Yoongi would certainly be back by now…

You were certain you’d manage the commute back to the castle if you had too but…You wouldn’t feel right just leaving without him, but you also had no way of sending a message to the castle for help without going back yourself.

You felt at a loss for what to do, as you roamed the main hall, pausing at the sound of the gate opening. Opening the doorway you hurried out to the courtyard.

“Yoongi, I’ve been waiting all day, you worried me sick!” You stopped short at the sight ahead of you.

“Not who you were expecting?”

Di Jin’s smug smile was the last thing you saw before the sudden blow to your head caused your vision to go dark.

“You look lost.” Jimin commented as he plopped in a seat right next to his dearest friend, both sat out for breakfast on the terrace.

“Was it a good idea sending her to the Estate?” Jungkook stared down in hard contemplation, his food untouched, “If something happens I won’t be able too…!”

He inhaled sharply as he forced himself to lean back in his chair, but despite the motion his body refused to relax.

You had left two days ago and he felt a void ever since.

Jungkook didn’t realize how much your presence had filled every inch of the castle until you had left, and now, he felt utterly useless, it was one thing for you to be mad at him, it was another for you to be gone.

Jimin looked amused but felt bad for him nonetheless, “Nothing is going to happen to her, the estate is nice and tucked away, the entire court has forgotten about it anyways, it hasn’t been used in years. You did a good thing.”

“Did I?” Jungkook finally slumped.

He had been constantly replaying his last memory of you, the conversation you both had before you left, the memory of you looking up at him for a long moment as if silently yearning for some form of affection.

It left Jungkook’s hands twitching and an unfamiliar ache in his chest, he couldn’t even describe how it felt. And he was honest when he spoke with you the night before, true he didn’t remember much, but what he did remember was straight from his heart, he thought he knew many things.

But after meeting you he found out quickly that he knew nothing at all.

Tomorrow, surely you’d be back tomorrow. You hadn’t given him an exact timeframe, but surely when you said a few days, you had meant no more then three?

“What if I-”

“No.” Jimin cut him off, “The whole point of her going was to get out of the castle and by default away from you. Not only that but what if something happened to Wheein while you were gone?”

Jungkook sunk back in his chair, that was right…He had promised you he would take care of anything that might possibly happen.

He wouldn’t let you down.

“Have you found any evidence yet?” Jungkook lowered his voice, his gaze lingering on the far side of the table where Claudin had been dining with a group of court ladies.

Jimin frowned, “Yes but the problem is getting it open,” He huffed, “I was able to slip into his room last night, it was empty but he has a lock box beneath a hollowed broken floorboard piece, seems he was in a hurry when he left, otherwise it wouldn’t have been left afar.

“Regardless I haven’t been able to crack the lock. Whatever is in there, it has a master’s lock on it. I’ll need at least another dozen picks before I even come close to cracking it.”

Jungkook sighed as he shook his head in disdain, “Of course when we need Yoongi he’s gone.”

Their elder would be able to open it within the hour if he was here.

Jimin frowned as well, “I’ll try again this afternoon.”

Jungkook’s eyes narrowed, “That’s early for you.”

“We’re running out of time Jungkook,” Jimin sighed, sinking back into his chair as well, eyeing Claudin with a certain wryness, “I keep hearing stirrings from the guards about how they’ve narrowed their search, but they’re hellbent on saying it was Wheein.”

“Sire,”

They both paused at the sight of Taehyun, a frown on his face as he glanced between them both, an anxious look as he bowed slightly, “It’s the council…they’ve summoned you. It doesn’t sound good, you should come as well Jimin.”

Jungkook glanced at his friend but said nothing as he stood up, not liking this one bit.

The walk to the throne room was swift and Jungkook wasted no time in arriving, the other council members had just arrived as well.

Clearly he wasn’t the only one uncertain of what was going on, other members had started hushing whispers to one another, all glancing in Jungkook’s direction occasionally as he leaned against the wall, arms crossed as he glanced at the empty throne the seats on its left occupied by his aunt and uncle whispering to one another.

They both glanced at him once before quickly looking away.

The tension felt suffocating and the longer it lasted the more anxious Jungkook felt, seconds turned into minutes and the whispers began to get louder.

And all within a moment, the doors open and a sweepingly silence took over the room save for the sound of boots against the ground. Dae Seong walked with confience in every step before standing before everyone on the throne.

“It is with confidence I have come to announce something of the utmost importance,” His voice boomed, “The attempted assassination on our Crowned Princess, was indeed committed by her maid Jung Wheein, we have reason enough to believe it was her as all the evidence points as such. Her form of punishment will be burning at the stake, tonight at the height of the moon. I ask you all join me on this divine distribution of punishment,”

Groaning softly your vision was blurry at first, and the first person to appear in your vision was not who you expected.

“Not so quick witted now are you Eunoian Bitch,” Seohyun sneered, her smirking figure beneath you as your vision of her doubled.

Your mind was confused as you only remembered Di Jin being here, your eyes closed briefly only for a sharp pain to spread through your side that you recognized as being kicked in the side by her.

Groaning your eyes opened and her eyes beaded, sneering at you as another voice spoke, “Come along now Seohyun, why don’t you go see if that insufferable knight has managed to come back yet, I will finish our business here.”

She eyed you warily but said no more as she left and soon Di Jin stood in front of you, “You have truly been a pain in my ass since I was enlisted to kill you, I only hope you realize that.”

There was no remorse in his eyes as he pulled the wickedly curved knife from it’s sheath and a sadistic smile curled on his face, “Don’t worry Princess, i’ll make sure you have a slow miserable death.”

Despite your sluggish movements, adrenaline had shot in your veins as you realized you were about to die, you had too much to live for still. You needed to see what would come of Eunoia, you needed to make sure Wheein was okay, that you would keep your promise to Jungkook.

You couldn’t die, and you would fight if it meant living to see it.

Your mind was slowly coming out of it’s haze as Di Jin stepped closer to you, realizing you were in the courtyard near the hay bales, the pile you had cleaned early next to you, your arm reached over to grab one of the planks, three long rusted nails sticking out of it.

You swung it with as much force as you could towards his legs, it made contact, the nail piercing his skin with a wet noise as he cried out in pain, falling back on the ground as he growled out. “You dumb bitch, a pain until the end!”

You attempted to crawl away, heart pounding in your ears as you scurried but he was still too mobile, yanking the plank out of his leg with a growl of pain as he managed to get on top of you, you caught his wrists as he attempted to plunge the knife in your throat, “I’ll enjoy watching the life leave your eyes. I’ll be sure to bring your head back for your little husband to see one last time.”

Your strength was already failing as you winced out, the knife slowly coming closer to your skin as you whimpered out as it pierced the first layer of your flesh.

It was an indescrible pain that had you yelping in pain,

“I’ll make these last few moments the most excruciating and perhaps if you beg me enough, I might just end your pathetic little life girl,” Di Jin grinned leaning in closer, “Maybe if you beg me more i’ll give you a little more than just a long death.”

He pushed the knife a little deeper as blood spilled from your skin making you cry out, his body weighing heavier on yours and his lips suddenly pressing to your ear, “Something tells me you’d prefer that over this.”

Something about his lips pressing against your skin lit something primal inside of you, every sense heightened inside you as your lips parted taking a wide bite into his neck, you could taste it first, the metallic flavor of blood running across your tongue and dripping down your throat and then his skin was next, uncomfortably soft and tender and next was the cartilage, it was rubbery and had hard bits in it, next was the sensation of something warm and wet against your face.

Di Jin could no longer properly speak, his grip suddenly loosened on the knife as you yanked the large chunk of flesh straight from his neck, grabbing the knife as you yanked it away shoving him down as you managed to get on top of him.

The chunk missing from his neck was ghastly, blood pooling on the ground, oozing everywhere and squirting from various places and he was gagging loudly, choking on his own blood.

Anger trembled in your body, it wasn’t enough, even with chunks of flesh missing and blood covering your face, skin hanging and cartilage visible it still wasn’t enough, before you could even think you plunged the knife into his neck, eyes blurring as you watched him gurgle, choking on his own blood as the life left his eyes.

Your hands were shaking as you waited for him to jump back to life to kill you, and then you slowly realized your vision was blurred from tears, your heart pounding as you took a shaky breath yanking the knife out of his neck before you let out blood curdling scream slamming it back in his neck again.

Jungkook’s betrayal.

Wheein being taken.

Exiled from your own kingdom.

Being forced to wed.

Made into a healer as a child.

Bone.

Blood.

Ash.

The mourning bells rang in your head and you could vividly taste the metallic on your tongue stronger than ever as the taste of raw flesh lingered in your throat.

Blood splattered upward as you stabbed the spot over again, all of the rage searing in your veins as Di Jin’s form became disfigured, his neck nearly separating his head from his body as you shoved the knife in deeper.

Hearing the wet gurgling noise as you heaved a breath, staring at his cold dead eyes staring back at you, the next scream was not your own, but it came closer within seconds before the door to the estate opened.

Seohyun was heavily bleeding from her left thigh, sporting a large bite as a loud snarl came from inside the door, shakily you stood up, “Fenrir, wait.”

The large wolf paused, and that's when you noticed the large gash on his leg, causing him to limp, rage quelled in your veins again as you limped over, Seohyun looked pale a ghost at the sight of you.

From the moment this woman met you, she had given you nothing but grief, attempted to humiliate you, belittle you, try to win a lost battle, attempt to kill you, and now she had hurt your precious companion.

Even with a mangled body behind you, it still wasn’t enough.

Tripping over her own two feet she fell down as you walked over, “We can talk about this Y/n!” Her eyes were as big as saucers, “Please! I’ll leave Penumbra and- and never come back.”

You felt nothing for her as you stood above her, watching pathetic tears drip down her face for a long moment, finally you knelt down, “If Penumbra has taught me anything Seohyun, It’s that some people do not deserve my forgiveness, nor my kindness.”

Her lips parted rapidly, her throat scratchy, and for the first time, you saw genuine fear in her eyes, “B-but you’re a Eunoian,”

Her words were pointed, bargaining, pleading even- if you listened close enough, “Eunoian’s don’t kill.”

Your lips slowly lifted into a joyless smile as you let out an uneasy laugh, “Well,” Your smile dropped, your hands were still shaky, unbridled rage still taunt in your veins.

The primal urge of need to prove her wrong, prove all of them wrong, that you would never again be looked down upon as weak or underestimated.

Your hand grabbed her neck, causing her to let out a choked sob as you squeezed it tight enough to choke her airway, yanking her nearly nose to nose with you.

“We’re not in Eunoia, are we?” Your nails dug into her neck, not stopping until you felt the blood from her skin oozing, you shoved her back before you stood up, ignoring her blubbering, tears trickling down her face as you walked away, “Fenrir.”

“Please!”

He let out a growl, “Attack.”

Her cries of agony were left of deaf ears as you walked back over to the corpse of Di Jin grabbing the knife from his neck and yanking it out before taking the sheath that went with it, adjusting it on your waist.

Collapsing on the ground away from him you noticed your hands for the first time, shaking, trembling as your vision blurred once more, scarred and covered in blood, just what had you done?

Fenrir’s mouth was covered in blood, but the whine didn’t escape your ears as he tenderly tried to sit down in front of you.

“I’m sorry.” You ushered, grief strong in your voice though uncertain of who it was for, yourself, your country, your companion, you reached out for him, gently rubbing your hand down his neck, “But we have a long journey ahead of us Fenrir.”

The bells were ringing and a somber air had taken over, Jungkook had nearly lost his entire wits, his father had banished him from the room, not wanting to hear another word from him about this.

Being told he was too sentimental fell on deaf ears, he didn’t care, it was his friend, it was injustice, it was corrupt. He hated it, he hated that despite being the crowned prince, his son, his father simply didn’t care.

All Jungkook could do was wait for Jimin to unlock this damn box. But it felt as though it was too late, he was banned from so much as leaving his room, guards at his door there to keep him boxed in but this wouldn’t stop him.

pulling the cloak over his head, he opened the window, the bricks were jagged and uneven enough that he could easily climb down, he did it often when he was younger, much to the blindness of his father.

Scaling the wall, Jungkook got down, feet planted firmly on the ground as he kept the hood over his head tight as he made his way to the courtyard. A crowd had gathered, all wanting to witness the supposed assassin.

Nobody paid mind to him with his identity concealed, it would be soon now. If he couldn’t get evidence to get Wheein out, then Jungkook would take matters into his own hand. He didn’t want to have Wheein leave Penumbra, but if this is what it took to keep her safe until her innocence was proven, this is what he would do.

He owed so much of his existence to her, he couldn’t let this happen.

He wasn’t going to let this happen.

The bells stopped as Dae Seong stood up from his throne on the wooden stage they had set up, “We have all gathered here to see the execution of the assassin who tried to kill our crowned princess! Her very own handmaid, this is the killer, our own flesh and blood, and the punishment for a traitorous woman is fitting, burning of the steak!”

Wheein was brought out, her hands tied behind her back, her eyes had dark circles and she was crying as she shook her head, “Please! I would never do that to Penumbra! To Y/n! Please you have to believe me!”

But her cries were in vein as the crowd boo’d her, all shouting vile words her way as they dragged her down to the large wooden steak pyre that had been set up.

Jungkook shifted in his spot as he watched them begin to tie her up.

“Are there any last words you would like to impart to us traitor?” Dae Seong looked at her with pure disgust.

Wheein’s lips quivered as she parted them.

A loud bloodcurdling scream interrupted her before she could speak, the crowd tensed and everyone seemed alert, Jungkook was towards the front, having intended on getting her off there the right moment, but he quickly turned around to see people quickly departing and creating a path.

And the next thing he saw was hardly comprehensible.

You, covered in blood, your face was a horrific sight with it’s dried crimson color covering your mouth all the way down your neck, but what was even more horrifying was what was next to you, Fenrir limping beside you, a corpse held in his mouth.

Women screamed and men gasped in horror as they all moved.

The looks on the royals faces were indescribable, Dae Seong most of all, “What is the meaning of this?”

You stopped in front of the throne, Fenrir as if knowing this was the destination, dropped the body from his jaws, it smacked the ground with a wet echo, the head finally detaching from the body as it rolled towards Dae Seong.

You don’t think you had ever seen an expression quite like what Dae Seong had, and you were sure this would be the only time.

It was silent for a long moment before you finally spoke, your throat raw and scratchy, “That’s your assassin, he tried to kill me again just hours ago.”

Dae Seong’s look of shock slowly twisted into one of rage, “Where is your proof of this!” He stood up from his throne towering over you with a growl, “What does a girl like you have meddling in business you don’t understand and taking the lives of those who were helping!”

“Am I standing in front of you not proof enough?” You snarled back, “From the moment I have come to this kingdom I have been nothing but disrespected, disregarded, used, and seen as nothing more than a tool to further someone’s agenda. And i’m sick of it.”

“Even when it comes to my own life, you stand in front of me questioning it!”

“Why I ought too!-”

“I have it!” A voice cried out, Jimin was running from the side entrance of the courtyard, a notebook in his hand as he panted, his eyes widening when they set on you, ‘Y/n!? Are you okay? I have it, I have proof that Di Jin was the assassin! Here, your majesty.”

Dae Seong snatched it with a certain level of venom as he looked through the book, but slowly as his eyes read through, an unreadable look took over his face.

Exhaustion began to take over, your body beginning to sway.

Dae Seong closed the book with a sense of finality, “Very well,” He aid with gritted teeth, anger still simmering in his eyes, “Perhaps, you do have the grit to survive here princess.”

You didn’t hear his words though, your gaze had went down to the body of Di Jin, and swaying backwards you collapsed into an abyss of darkness, nothing more then multiple people calling your name.

#wicked

[ittomi]

deep six: dancing with death. (m) jjk

part one. part two. v-day drabble

pairing. biker!jk x reader genre. smut, fluff warnings. infidelity (but its ok i promise), protected s*x, oral, jungkook is kinda whiny and that itself deserves a warning, they're just fluffy and mushy and love each other they just dont know it yet word count. 12.2k summary. you've always known to stay away from the tombstone patches, told they were the enemy, that you'd be betraying your club if you chose not to listen. but an unsuspected friendship makes you think that maybe not everyone was as bad as you were made to believe. author’s note. hihiiii, this is a prequel to the deep six series! aka how jungkook and oc start their friendship and have it blossom into what it becomes in part one of deep six. i truly love these two so much, something about their forbidden love and how jungkook is tough and dangerous but oh so sweet to her makes me fucking melt!!! ok hope u enjoy it bye ily muah

The world is a constant blur, days merging, memories hazy and bleeding together in your mind. The only time you enjoy the blur is now, sitting on your bike as you flow through the streets. Exiting Cobra territory made you feel free, the streets widening up the further you got, allowing you to cruise without the fear of getting swiped by a careless driver. 

Your eyes fall shut briefly, taking a slow breath as you try to push the earlier feelings away. Minho was having a bad day, a deal he had hoped to make to start running ice falling through, the man in charge deciding to go with a neighboring club instead. It wasn’t your fault the man thought Minho was too hot headed and messy to not find a way to mess this deal up, wanting a club with more reach, more connections and reliability than the Cobras could offer. That didn’t stop Minho from treating you like it was your fault, doing what he did best before barking orders at you to go for a run, desperately needing alcohol to drown his emotions. 

The earlier fear still rattles you, leaves your fingers trembling slightly as they clutch the handles and accelerate. He couldn’t hurt you here, and that's all the comfort you need at the moment, finally pulling into the familiar parking lot of the bodega. There’s a few cars parked inside, a lone scooter tossed by the sidewalk, and a shiny black bike parked by the entrance. 

You eye it for a moment, always checking for visible tags that let you know if the bike belonged to a club that had the Cobra’s high on their hit list. It’d be easy to act dumb if it was, no identifying items on you, knowing better than to roam the streets without Minho with a serpent stamped on you. 

When you find nothing you decide it’s fine, knowing you were on a time crunch to get what he wanted. With another slow breath you step off your bike, already feeling your earlier nerves fade away as you enter your comfort space. It seems odd to consider it one, but something about the buzzing fluorescent lighting and peeling laminate made you feel like an individual. 

Music plays through a portable speaker by the cashier, the worker greeting you with a smile that you return before you turn down your favorite aisle. That’s when you spot him again. The Deep Six member in the same spot he was in the last time you saw him a few weeks ago. It had been a close encounter then, not realizing who he was with your boyfriend standing outside. But his arms are revealed to you now, markings on his skin making it clear what club he belonged to, leaving no room for confusion. If that somehow wasn’t enough the giant patches on his vest and the glimmering rings on his fingers spell it out, literally. 

You approach him slowly, not sure if you trust him but not fully on edge like you were before, knowing Minho’s watchful eyes weren’t observing your every move. Without the ticking bomb a few feet away you allow yourself to slightly relax in the presence of him, assuming he had no idea who you were, clearly too focused on his candy selection. 

Sure you were on a run for Minho but you always pick something up for yourself. A small smile is already on your lips as your eyes land on the sour straws, ready to pick your flavor of choice, only to find it completely empty. Instantly you know the culprit is the man next to you, remembering the way you had reached for the same candy last time you saw him here by chance, and as you turn to stare at him you see his palms cradling four packets of the sour straws, a teasing smile on his face as he meets your eyes. Greedy. 

“Sorry,” he breathes out, sounding anything but, trying desperately not to laugh and failing as he makes his way to the front to pay. You don’t even respond to him, admitting defeat as you settle on the green apple flavored ones before you return to your earlier task, finding a case of Minho’s favorite beer and paying for it. 

The heat welcomes you once more outside, loading up the beer and candy into the saddlebags on the side of your bike, already forgetting about the candy thief from inside. 

“Hey, Snake!” A voice cuts through the air, making you freeze as you search for it, finding the Six standing by the shiny black bike you had spotted earlier. He reaches into his pocket, still smiling as he pulls out the blue raspberry sour straw packet, tossing it your way with ease. 

You catch it with both palms, momentarily stunned at the small gesture and at the fact that he clearly knew you were associated with the Cobras. The rumble of his engine snaps you out of it, smiling slightly as you look up at him once more, a breathless thank you escaping your lips before he is smiling back and peeling out of the parking lot. 

When you live the life you do, constantly on edge with a paranoid boyfriend questioning everyone’s intentions, it's hard not to let his way of thinking affect your own. Even as you sit back at the clubhouse, holding onto that packet of candy, you can’t help but wonder if maybe the Six’s seemingly sweet gesture was a trap. Maybe he was testing to see how gullible you are, stupid enough to interact with him, to use you to send a message to the Cobras. It wouldn’t be the first time. Minho’s reign made you an easy target, knowing you had a lot of enemies that would love to make a lesson of you. 

It's been so long since anyone has shown you genuine kindness with no strings attached, and as you finally enjoy your treat, you can’t stop the warm feeling of hope in your chest that maybe not everyone was as bad as you were made to believe. 

You don’t return to your comfort space again until two weeks later, on another run for the club. Minho seemed to think if he gave you pointless errands to run you’d be satisfied, content with the loveless relationship and mundane everyday life. It was his way of keeping you on a leash, making you follow orders and letting the lead slacken up, only tightening it back up to remind you he was all you had. But you’d take the small moments of peace wherever you could get them. 

The lot is empty today as you pull in, the only car belonging to the worker inside. The moment of solitude only lasts for a minute, a loud rumble cutting through the air as another bike pulls in beside you. You tense up immediately, whipping your head to assess the situation, spotting the familiar Six too lost in his thoughts to realize you were here. He furrows his brows as he takes off his helmet, adjusting the large rings on his fingers before he glances your way, jumping slightly when he notices it's you. 

You eye him curiously, hands coming up to the key in the ignition, ready to start it up and tail out of here if he made a move. Minho had made a claim of some other club trying to ambush a deal earlier today, an unlucky hangout being the only one hurt, but without an identifying patch it left him on edge more than normal. So far the Six didn’t make you feel like you had to be wary, but you couldn’t be so sure. 

He seems to sense it, his arms raising up in surrender as he stays on his bike. “It’s okay snake, I don’t bite.” He smiles at his own stupid remark, but it slowly falls off his face when he sees the stoic expression remains on yours. “Seriously though, I’m just here for some smokes and a treat. I can go somewhere else if it really makes you this uncomfortable though.”

“Why aren’t you somewhere else to begin with?” you bite back, still not trusting that he wasn’t trying to trap you. 

Jungkook just sighs, hand coming up to ruffle up his helmet hair. “It’s nice to get away sometimes. This is neutral grounds, you know as best as I do that anything club related done here is a death wish.” He lets you process his statement, seeing the way you continue to eye him, your gaze tracing along the patches he wears. The large tombstone taunts you, torn and a little rugged on the edges, showing just how long he’s been wearing it. “Why aren’t you somewhere on your side of town?”

You purse your lips, looking away from him as you pull your hand away from your key, getting off your bike, deciding this conversation was better to have inside your little safe space. “Like you said, it’s nice to get away sometimes.” You hook your helmet over your handle, reaching the bodega’s door and holding it open as you look back at him. “You coming?”

He seems to snap out of it, quickly hopping off his bike and jogging your way, saying a quick greeting to the worker before going down the familiar aisle. He smiles when he sees you next to those damn sour straws. 

“Those must be your favorite huh?”

You give him a quick glance, seeing the smile on his lips before you turn back and grab a packet of the candy. “They are, so try not to take all of them at once again.”

He lets out a soft laugh, reaching forward and grabbing a couple of the same. “I gave you one last time, which says a lot because I don’t really like sharing.”

“A Six that doesn’t like sharing? That’s not surprising.” Your words are light, a small smile tugging at the corner of your lips as you turn around and continue roaming the aisle. 

“Not as surprising as a Snake trying to tell me what to do.” The crinkling of plastic fills the store as he rips open his packet, taking a bite of a sour straw as he tries to hide his own smile when you give him an eye roll. 

“I’m not technically a Snake,” you mutter out, finger tracing along the chocolate bar you were contemplating grabbing. It wasn’t a lie, you didn’t wear the patch, you weren’t granted the perks of being a part of the club, nothing you said held any weight on the decisions they made. You weren’t a Cobra, you just belonged to one of them. Though that didn’t seem like the wisest thing to tell him, you knew the history between Deep Six and the Cobras, and telling him you belonged to Minho of all people would put you high up on his list of people to hurt if he had bad intentions to begin with. 

“Oh? You just like to hang on to the back of one then?”

“Something like that,” you sigh, deciding not to grab the extra treat, turning to look at him fully once more. “Are you gonna keep calling me a snake?”

His tongue prods along his cheek as he looks down at you, eyebrow slowly cocking up. “What would you rather I call you?”

“Y/N.”

He nods slowly, letting your name settle into his mind before he was reaching his hand out, the golden glimmering rings spelling out SIX shining in the light. You eye his hand for a minute before grabbing it in a gentle handshake, seeing the way he smiles before saying his own name. 

“Jungkook.”

Jungkook was proud of his club, wore his patch with pride, did everything he could to show his loyalty. So why was he starting to tell white lies to his brothers, making up excuses to justify why he was going to the bodega on neutral grounds directly after finishing a job. He knew what would happen if they knew who he was talking to, slowly befriending. His only rational excuse was the fact that you had said you weren’t technically a Cobra, and although he’s not sure how well that would hold up to the rest of his members, it was the only excuse that helped ease his guilt. 

He was currently sat on the small sidewalk outside of the bodega, elbows leaning on his knees as he glanced around the empty lot. You had been meeting here once every week or so. He had started to take note of the typical times you’d be sent on runs of your own, choosing to coincidentally run into you at the same time. You had yet to arrive today though, leaving him waiting for fifteen minutes, wondering if maybe you wouldn’t be showing up today. 

Just before he decides to head out, you pull into the lot on your Dyna, a smile on your face when you spot him sitting on the sidewalk like a child. 

“You’re late,” he calls out, grabbing a packet of candy and tossing it your way when you get off your bike and head towards him. 

“Sorry, I wasn’t aware we had a time set for our little play dates.” You open up the candy, taking a bite and shutting your eyes at the sour taste. Jungkook laughs at your expression, patting the sidewalk beside him for you to settle into. 

“I can’t be left unsupervised, you should know this by now.”

You laugh now, taking a look at the bodega and the surrounding area. “Nothing seems to be destroyed, I think you do just fine unsupervised.”

He leans back on his palm, raking back his dark hair as he stares into the sky in thought. “I tend to cause psychological damage, not too big on destroying property.”

“Got it. So you torture people?”

Jungkook chuckles, turning to look at you slightly, a small twinkle of mischief flashing in his eyes as he smiles. “Exactly.”

You can only laugh, not exactly sure how truthful he was being with his little joke. The both of you made an effort to not discuss the intricacies of your clubs, not entirely sure what it was that you both did for them, knowing things would get too messy and tangled up if you did. Instead you talk about yourselves, knowing small anecdotes of each other’s childhoods, recounting stories of when he took a few tumbles on his bike when he was just starting to learn to ride, ones of you before the life of the Cobras was all you knew. 

It was a brief moment of normalcy, being able to talk to someone else, laughing over dumb jokes while sharing candy. It made you forget how twisted all of it was until you returned back home. 

Jungkook just appreciated having a new friend, someone to talk to about things that didn’t have to do with his club. He just wished he could talk to you in moments that lasted longer than the brief bodega hang outs. So as you both finish up, loading up your bike with the items you were told to come pick up, he takes a leap of faith. 

“Hey, can I—uh. Can I have your number?” He looks uncharacteristically shy as he asks this, one hand rubbing along the back of his neck. “To arrange our play dates,” he adds jokingly, a small smile on his lips in hopes of softening the blow of potential rejection as he reaches for his phone and hands it over. 

You freeze instantly, staring at his device as the voice in your head tells you not to, screams that this would get you in trouble. But the hopeful look on his face is enough to shut it up, grabbing his phone with a nod. “Sure, but uhm, I can’t text often.”

His brows furrow slightly at the tone you use, watching the way you type in your number and text yourself. Something about it made it seem like you were nervous, and the only thing he can assume is that the people you were around would grow curious over who you were texting. 

“Why? Scared your Snake friends would be pissed that a Six is texting you?” His tone is playful, but as you hand him his phone back, the look on your face makes his smile slowly fade away. 

“My boyfriend, specifically.”

Jungkook feels his heart drop at the revelation. He knew you were most likely involved with a Cobra, having seen you the first time you met on the back of one’s bike—more specifically, Minho’s bike. He had just assumed you were Minho’s chosen girl for the day, but if you were mentioning a boyfriend now, Jungkook could easily piece together who exactly that is. 

The third cardinal rule of his club replays in the back of his mind, “Never get involved with a Cobra”. It makes his head hurt, desperately trying to find a deeper excuse, a loophole to allow this to continue. It shouldn’t mean anything, you two were just friendly, barely even toeing that line as it was. But just knowing you were spoken for, by the leader of the Cobras especially, made the guilt he already felt for speaking to you get worse. 

But he does his best to shake it off, drowning out his thoughts as he takes his phone back and shrugs. 

“We’re just two people who share a love for sour straws, but if it makes you feel better you text me whenever you want.”

You don’t text him for a while, the fear of your tiny little secret being exposed keeps you from responding to the text you had sent yourself from his phone. There was also the small feeling of guilt festering in your stomach, feeling like you had lied to him by keeping your relationship a secret. All he had assumed from the get go was that you liked to hang around Cobras, but you noticed the way his face had changed when you mentioned a boyfriend, and you can only imagine how he’d react if you told him your boyfriend was the leader of the Cobras. 

You find yourself staring at your device any chance you get, hidden in the bathroom of your place, lounging on the couch in the clubhouse, until you finally get the courage to send the first text. It makes your heart race, saving his number under your best friend's name, changing the emoji at the end so you know the difference, going as far as putting his messages on do not disturb. Clearly hiding, keeping him a secret. 

Jungkook knows it's wrong, because he’s keeping it a secret too. But once that first text was sent, they never stopped. He responds when he has time in between club duties, knowing you’ll reply when you get a moment alone. Your messages are short, random conversations that never crossed any lines, but he meant what he said, taking full advantage of having your number to coordinate your play dates. 

The guilt you feel slowly fades away with each passing day, becoming comfortable in your ways as you let him know what days you’ll be on that side of town, and before you know it, your hang outs become your favorite thing. You slowly start to consider Jungkook your friend, another rare slice of peace in your messy life. It makes you feel like your younger self, excited to speak to a cute boy and laugh until your cheeks hurt. 

And it should make you feel icky to have these thoughts about someone who wasn’t your boyfriend, but your relationship with Minho had been romantically dead for years now, not able to remember the last time he did something for you that didn’t solely benefit him. So you choose to enjoy the small flutters in your stomach that occur around Jungkook, allowing yourself to sit closer to him each time, friendly touches beginning to get more courageous while still toeing the line. 

Jungkook doesn’t mind it, he thought you were pretty and would let you trace the patches on his jacket or analyze his tattoos up close if that's what you wanted. You were the one with a boyfriend, who was he to tell you what was right or wrong for you to do, he wasn’t one to judge or pull a morality card on you considering the things he does in his club. It was all mostly innocent anyways, even now as you stand a good few feet away from each other, respective candy in each other's hands, attempting to toss them into your mouths. 

It was innocent. 

“God, your aim is horrible!” you laugh out, feeling the candy hit your forehead and bounce right off. 

“What are you talking about? That was a clear headshot.” He has that charming smirk on his face as he says it, tongue flicking against his lip ring while he laughs too. 

“You’re not trying to kill me Jungkook, we’re trying to see who wins first.” You swat the remnants of sugar off your face as you reach into your own bag for a piece of candy, motioning for him to be ready. He gets into position, slightly bending his knees and angling his head back with his mouth open, ready to catch whatever you throw. With a small snicker you grab four small pieces of candy, aiming right for his face with one eye shut and sending them flying. Jungkook is totally unsuspecting until suddenly, he’s being pelted all over his face, his eyes squeezing shut at the shock. 

“Dude,” he laughs, eyes finally opening up to spot you cackling away, perfectly content at your little stunt. 

“Okay, okay sorry. For real this time. I got it, I can feel it in my bones.” Jungkook should tell you no, say you wasted your turn and deliver payback, but you look too happy right now for him to do anything but smile and nod as he gets back into position once more. He sees the way you bring your hand close to your face, shutting one eye to try to aim, tongue slightly poking out in concentration before you toss the candy across a few feet of distance. 

Jungkook doesn’t even register that the candy successfully landed in his mouth until you’re gasping in shock. That’s when his eyes widen, his mouth shutting as he begins to chew, standing up straight and feeling his heart start to warm at how proud you look at having beat him. He closes the distance between you, extending a hand out for a high five that you gladly give him. 

Now that you’re closer, you see all the sprinkles of sugar on his face. It dusts along his cheekbones and the top of his nose, looking like small freckles on his skin. You give him an endearing smile as you cup his face and swipe it away from his skin. You do it without thinking really, tips of your fingers gently flicking away the evidence of your tiny prank. 

Jungkook’s chest tightens at the soft gesture, eyes wide as he watches you, too scared to move, almost like it would startle you or make you come to your senses and remember he was a Six. He chooses to just focus on how soft your hand feels against his cheek, how sweet you sound when you say he looks like a mess, your eyes filled with what he hopes is the same adoration he has as you look up at him, a lot closer than you need to be.

Jungkook knows all the sugar is gone now but you’re still there, thumb rubbing along his cheek, tracing the scar under his eye while your gaze lands on the piercing on his lip. He holds his breath when you look up at him once more, and maybe it's his wishful thinking but he swears the way you look at him tells him to make a move, so he does. Slowly at first, wanting to give you a chance to deny his advances, but you meet his lips before he can close the distance himself.

The innocence is gone now. Jungkook had felt something brewing with each of your interactions, chalking it off to pure friendliness, but he knows a small spark had been lit the second you started speaking to each other. 

The kiss burns, the guilt and betrayal to his club clawing at his mind but he doesn't care, welcoming it as he deepens it, sliding his hand into your hair and focusing on the way you let out a soft breath as he does so. It makes your mind spin, your hands gently looping around his neck to bring him closer. You don’t have time to think, too enveloped in the way his piercing feels against your lips, how his fingers softly rake through your hair, how he takes a deep breath when you kiss him back harder. 

It's brief, a small moment of weakness led by temptation, but you can’t deny how you both feel exhilarated, wide eyes and smiles on your faces when you pull back. "You taste like candy," you giggle.

“Your favorite,” he mumbles, still close enough to nudge the tip of his nose along yours. His voice is low as he lets reality settle, slowly inching back, his eyes meeting yours and seeing the small clouds of panic start to form around you. Reality seems to be hitting you too, fear of what would happen to him if Minho ever found out, or what would happen to you if he even had an inkling. A small harmless crush had just passed over into dangerous territory. 

“Hey,” Jungkook starts softly, hand gently coming to rest on your shoulder to bring you back to the present. “It doesn’t have to mean anything.”

“No, but it does,” you groan. It did mean something, it didn’t matter how small it seemed, but you know the kiss meant something. Your small panic had nothing to do with being unfaithful, you knew Minho cheated on you with any girls who were willing to show their loyalty to the club, and if it kept him off of you then you didn’t mind it. You were scared to put Jungkook in danger. “It means something and my boyfriend’s crazy, he’ll kill both of us if he finds out.”

“I know he is.” He shrugs, looking directly at you, seeing the shocked look on your face at his admission. 

“You know what?” you whisper. 

“I know he’s a psycho. I kind of put two and two together when you mentioned a boyfriend. It is Minho right?” When you nod slowly, still unsure how to respond he just continues speaking. “But look, I know. All of it. I know I’m not supposed to be speaking to you, let alone kissing you and enjoying it, but it happened. I know it’s wrong, that I should feel bad and I don’t, but I also know where my loyalties lie within the club and what rules I’m willing to bend. If you’re saying it means something, then it does.”

You can only stare at him, feeling the clouds of panic start to fade. “But I'm telling you, I know what's at risk and I won’t be using it to harm you.”

“I mean…it is both our asses on the line,” you mumble out, still feeling his hand on your shoulder. He smiles at your words now, making you slowly smile back. 

“So, we’re taking it to our graves?” His voice is light again, the playful tone you were used to back. When you nod he smiles wider. “Cool, should we kiss on it?”

Jungkook laughs when you shove his shoulder with a cackle, rolling your eyes as you step back, walking back into the bodega to get what you came for. “You’re so unserious. Get away from me.”

The issue with this imaginary line being crossed is that it leaves you thinking “what’s next”, constantly wondering just what else you could get away with. One kiss shared turns into two which turns into five, given so casually it feels like second nature. It seems like both of your guards have dropped now, more at ease with each other, touches getting as bold as they could in public. 

“Are you sure my skin isn’t gonna burn off?” you joke, laughing when Jungkook gives you an eye roll. His jacket is in his hands, shaking it off before he’s swinging it around your frame, helping you slide your arms into it. He had jokingly said it would swallow you whole, and you honestly just wanted an excuse to be closer to him so when he suggested you try it on you couldn’t deny him. 

“You might burst into flames, so just drop and roll baby.” He snickers when you playfully glare at him. Jungkook looks down at you with a smile, his hands smoothing the collar before he’s taking a step back to admire how the large leather jacket looked on you. The patches cover the arms and back, his first initial, last name and rank displayed over the left breast pocket, something your finger comes up to trace absentmindedly.  

“I don’t know, the jacket suits you. You sure you don’t wanna become a Six?”

“Very funny Jungkook. They’ll be putting a Cobra on my tombstone when I’m dead.” 

He waves you off, reaching into his pocket to pull out his phone. “Let me live in my fantasy world, yeah?”

“Your fantasy world involves me being a Six?” you giggle, looking up at him with a sly smile.

“Don’t kink shame me. Now smile for the picture,” he sings out, bending down as he extends his arm out, ready to take a selfie. You had yet to take photos of you both, too scared to be caught by Minho, but you allowed Jungkook to document your newly formed friendship as much as he wanted, knowing he had less to worry about when it came to snooping. 

Your arms wrap around him, the tombstone patch on display as you both smile widely for the picture. He looks at it with a cheeky grin, mumbling out how cute he thought it was before putting his phone away. 

“Do you need the usual for your run today?” he asks, knowing Minho always had you stocking up his alcohol. 

“Not today. I’m technically supposed to be locked inside our place. A few Cobra’s headed out of state this morning for a meeting.”

Jungkook hums, having briefly heard of an arms deal happening out of state, he just hadn’t been aware it was the Cobra’s doing. “Why didn’t you go with?”

“Too risky.” You lean back against the textured wall of the building, still cozy in his jacket. Minho loved to have you right by his side at all times, so if he said it was safer for you to stay here then you wouldn’t question him. “He has to make sure his prized possession stays safe.”

Jungkook laughs, slinging an arm around you and bringing you to his side obnoxiously. “Well you tell him I have that covered.”

“Jungkook, he’d cut your tongue out. Stop it!” you cackle. 

“I’d like to see him fucking try,” he grunts out, enjoying the way you playfully swat at him. He’d like to think he could have Minho’s head served on a silver platter if he ever got close enough to put his hands on him. 

“What about you? Any fun club plans after our playdate?”

Jungkook sighs, a smile still on his face. “Nope. I’m officially clocked out.” Your laugh is felt against his side, only making his smile widen. “I just have to stop by the clubhouse to grab something before heading home.”

“How far is the clubhouse from here?” You’re looking up at him with a twinkle in your eye, your smile still as sweet as can be, but he senses some undertone that he hopes he isn’t imagining. 

“Not far, about 20 minutes. Why? You want a tour?”

That was all he had to ask before you were following his bike down the busy streets on his side of town. His jacket is still on you, providing you with a small sense of security, knowing if anyone spotted you they’d assume you were with him. It leaves you at ease, entering the secure lot of his clubhouse, coming to a stop beside him and glancing around as you take off your helmet. 

It’s empty, a few cars parked around that looked like they were in need of repair, but no other bikes or lingering people. Jungkook steps off his bike, motioning for you to follow him, excited at showing you his favorite place. 

As you follow his lead you instantly see how different Deep Six’s clubhouse is compared to the Cobras. The space is taken care of, decorated thoughtfully, a space made for business as well as hanging out with their friends and families. Touches of the club are nestled around, a large Harley on display on a far wall, a frame showing the timeline and evolution of their patch tucked between other photos, and the most obvious and slightly obnoxious ode to the club comes in the gallery wall displaying all of their mugshots. Cute. 

“It’s nothing fancy,” he mumbles, spreading his arms out as he stands in the middle of the main room. A brown tufted leather couch is right behind him, a giant pool table behind it and a fully loaded bar to the right. 

“Compared to ours it sure is.” The Cobra’s clubhouse was made for business only, the meeting room was kept in pristine condition while the rest of it was only made to be nice enough to house drunken members and whatever hangouts were in the process of joining. 

“Really?” When you nod he just frowns, approaching you to grab your hand and pull you along, trying to show you more. “I’ll show you my space.”

“Your space?” you wonder, smiling when he squeezes your palm lightly, leading you down a hall to the right. A few doors line both walls, different ranks tacked on the middle of them, coming to a stop in front of one that says Road Captain. You had never really paid attention to his rank on his jacket, never really caring to read anyone’s rank in general, but seeing it displayed on this door let you know just how deep his involvement in his club was. 

“Only ranked members get private rooms.” He sounds almost bashful as he says this, grinning before opening up the door and switching on the light. A desk is on the right, paperwork neatly stacked in piles, a dresser is along the other wall with pictures tacked onto a cork board right above it. His bed is in the middle, sheets a dark gray and neatly made. It’s nestled between two windows on either side, letting in the slowly setting sunlight. 

You step into the room, walking to the dresser to look at the photos he has tacked up. He looks younger in some of these, hair messier and longer, no piercing or tattoos yet as he leans on his bike, another member attempting to put him in a headlock. They’re all club photos for the most part, the only one standing out is a photo of a teenage looking Jungkook holding up a diploma with what you can only assume is his parents beside him. 

“Cute,” you mumble out, smiling as you turn back to face him. It was odd to feel this calm around him, so used to the faint ticking heard in your head, reminding you that you were running on borrowed time, forced to interact in small bursts. With Minho completely occupied, the ticking disappears, allowing you to fully enjoy the moment for what it was. 

“I didn’t expect you to be sentimental like this,” you tease, smiling at the way his eyes narrow at you as he approaches, his tongue poking at his cheek as he fights a smile. 

“I’m full of surprises,” he murmurs, standing a foot away from you now, peering down at you with an aura of playfulness surrounding him. Your hands reach out to gently play with the material of his shirt, tugging him even closer. Jungkook could feel the tension, the same slowly growing tension that had been brewing with each day spent together. He can only watch as your hands slowly trail up his stomach, gliding up to gingerly rest against his chest. 

He wanted to kiss you, wanted to feel you gasp against his lips, but the last thing he wanted to do was make you feel like he had suggested showing you his clubhouse to be a total sleaze. Jungkook knew the line had grown blurry, kisses and touches shared with ease, but he wasn’t bold enough to assume you’d be okay with taking anything further. So when you decide to make the first move, leaning up to ghost your lips over his own, he can only hold his breath, eyes fluttering shut when you softly press them together. 

Your hands rest on his shoulders now, holding yourself steady as you kiss him, feeling the way his body melts into it. You pull away with a soft smack of your lips, inching back slightly. “What other surprises do you have?” 

Jungkook holds in a groan when you start to pepper kisses on the corner of his mouth, trailing them down his jaw, gently nipping the skin of his throat right below his ear. You giggle when he shudders, his hands gripping your waist, fingers tightening around you. 

“If you let me, I can show you.” His voice holds a tinge of unsureness, wanting for you to be okay with this without sounding pushy. But Jungkook had been thinking of this since your first kiss so he couldn’t help the desperate tone laced between each syllable. 

“Show me. Show me whatever you want,” you whisper, hand coming up to cup his cheek, looking up at him through your lashes. When his eyes meet yours he finally lets his resolve crack, attaching your lips once more in a heated kiss, finally feeling you gasp against him. 

Jungkook is a little ashamed to admit how easily this was affecting him, his heart already racing in his chest, stomach fluttering with each shared moan, bulge growing in his jeans when your hand slips into his hair and pulls. His hands slide down the material of his jacket you have on, pulling it off your body and tossing it aside without a care. He feels you smile against his lips at the action, clearly enjoying the way his hands roam along your body, desperate to touch you in ways he wasn’t able to before. 

It’s an eager dance to his bed, blindly stepping back as he guides you to it until your knees buckle against the mattress, giggling as you flop onto it. Your arm rests back to hold you steady, other hand gripping onto his shirt to yank him back over you, reattaching your lips in a heated kiss. 

Jungkook laughs into the kiss, his arm wrapping around you to haul you further up the bed properly, slowly pushing you back until you’re flat against the bed. His body settles over you, the cute visual of his hair framing his face is the first thing you see when your eyes flutter open as he pulls back. His eyes are hooded as he stares at you, his hand coming up to gently cradle your jaw, thumb rubbing along your bottom lip as he smirks before dipping back down. 

He kisses the corner of your mouth, following the same trail you had left on him earlier, smiling against your skin when you shudder as he nips your neck. Slowly, his hands slide down your body, fingers toying with the hem of your shirt and tugging it up to reveal your stomach. 

“Can I take this off?” he mumbles, eyes peering up at you for confirmation. When you breathe out a yes, he slides it further up, helping you slip out of your shirt fully before you’re settling on your back again. A thin bralette covers your boobs, lacey cups revealing a glimmer on your nipples that has him tilting his head in curiosity. 

You catch what he’s looking at, smile spreading on your lips as you reach up to touch his jaw, finger gently tapping along the small mole he has below his lips. “I’m full of surprises too,” you mumble, smiling wider when he boldly cups your chest, thumb swiping at your pierced nipple through the lace. 

“I can see that,” he mumurs, voice low and raspy, making your stomach flip. He looks at you once more, brow cocking up in question as his fingers toy with the fabric. You nod your head, knowing what he wanted, allowing him to slip the straps off your shoulders before he’s sliding a palm under your back to properly unclasp your bra, giving himself the perfect view. 

Its hard to ignore the small burst of confidence that surges through you when he groans, eyes hooded while he leans down to pepper kisses down your chest. It had been such a long time since you’ve felt truly desired, since you’ve been kissed delicately, had hands touch your skin so gently it tickles and leaves you breathing out a laugh. So you relish in it. You shut your eyes and enjoy the way Jungkook presses wet kisses to your skin, you let yourself gasp in pleasure when he wraps his lips around your pierced nipple and sucks. 

Your hands instinctively slip through his hair, fingers yanking his thick strands as he hums against your skin, tongue flicking along the piercing. Jungkook feels the way you jut your chest further out, back arching at the sensation. A deep groan escapes you as his palm comes up to cup your other breast, the cool feeling of his rings sending a shiver down your spine. 

He smiles as he pulls back, cocky with eyes twinkling with mischief as his fingers playfully dance down your body. 

His eyes are locked with yours as his fingers reach the waistband of your jeans, teasingly dipping past it as he lifts a brow in question. He needed clear boundaries, not wanting to cross any lines. You find it cute, how despite the fact that you’re laying here, chest heaving with anticipation, eyes surely wild with desire, he’s still wanting to make sure. 

“Can I?” He repeats his earlier question, features soft as he waits for your answer. 

“We need to even out the playing field first Six,” you tease, smiling when he chuckles and points to his shirt. You nod, staring up at him from the bed as he kneels up, staring right at you as he reaches behind his neck and yanks the shirt off of his body. 

Your blood warms up further at the sight of him, seeing his muscles flex under his tattoos as he straightens back up. Jungkook tilts his head slightly, biting on his lip ring as he fights back the smile at your clear admiration. The black marks his skin, some tattoos looking darker than others, showing you just which ones were recent additions. 

The owl on his chest looks the brightest, edges still crisp, shading looking rich in the skulls beneath each wing. They seem to move as Jungkook takes a breath, snapping you out of it as you look back into his eyes. 

“Is this even enough for you?” he jokes, smiling wide when you nod in confirmation, your eyes following his movements as his hand returns to your jeans. You watch with bated breath as he unbuttons the top, slowly pulling down the zipper before his hands hook into the waistband and starts to tug. Your hips lift from the bed to help, allowing him to pull them off, tossing them to the side along with your shoes and socks. 

You can feel your stomach flipping with nerves, the worry of doing something new with someone new, the small clouds of insecurity rolling in, wondering if you looked good in this angle, if maybe Jungkook preferred you to look a certain way or wear cute underwear with bows on the front instead of the black regular cotton ones you currently have on. 

It all settles down as he drops lowers, eyes looking up at you as he presses kisses onto your hips and slowly tugs your underwear down, clearly not paying any mind to them. A trail of goosebumps blossom down your thighs, following your underwear as he pulls them off too. He stands up once more, eyes swimming with want as he sees you. 

“Let me get a good look at you,” he murmurs when he notices the way your arms begin to want to cover yourself up at being fully exposed. He thinks it's cute how shy you seem now, eyes bouncing away from his as he takes his time drinking you in. With your eyes diverted, he thinks it's a great time to dive in, his hands coming down to grip your palms while his face nudges its way into the crook of your neck to kiss your skin, smiling at the way you gasp and laugh at the ticklish feeling

“Jungkook!” you giggle, feeling his hands pin your own down on the bed, his mouth traveling down your body as he guides your hands into his hair, letting you know he wants you to keep playing with the strands. Your finger twirls his hair around, feeling him smile against your skin as he descends once more. 

“Everything about you is so pretty,” he mumbles into your stomach, eyes peering up at you while his hands return to your hips, slowly sliding down to your thighs to grip the flesh. Wet kisses smack into your skin, leaving a trail on each hip and down your thigh until he’s suddenly biting. He laughs when you gasp, your fingers tugging his hair on instinct when you look down with a shocked expression. 

“Looked so good you had to take a bite?” you joke, smiling down at him, feeling the fluttering in your stomach when he winks. 

“Oh I need more than just a bite,” he groans, fingers tightening their hold on your thighs before he presses a kiss directly onto your mound, slowly sticking his tongue out to gently flick along your slit. 

Jungkook loves the way your breath gets shaky as you exhale, a soft moan of his name reaching his ears when he gently parts your folds and teasingly flicks against your clit. A part of him knows this might be the one and only time he’ll ever get to experience you like this, the only time he’ll see you flush on his bed, gasping for more as your hips roll into him. So he wants to store every moment in his brain, keep it locked away until the next time he misses you. 

“Fuck Jungkook, that feels good,” you moan, fingers locked in his hair, keeping him close as he ravishes you. The praise makes his ego grow, lips wrapping around your clit and sucking with the perfect amount of pressure. It makes your stomach tense, short little zaps of electricity flowing through your body with each flick of his tongue. 

“Good, I just wanna make you feel good.” He leans back a bit, admiring the look of your sodden folds for a moment before he's letting a glob of spit drip from his mouth directly onto your clit. He bites his lip as his fingers spread it around, coating his digits as he circles your entrance. His eyes meet yours again, brow raised in question, smiling when you nod in response. Slowly, he pushes forward, eyes focused on your reaction, seeing the way you bite down on your lip as his finger sinks in. 

Jungkook tries not to let his mind get carried away when he feels your walls fluttering around his digit, already imagining how you would feel around him, feeling his cock aching in his jeans as he sinks a second finger in to properly stretch you out. With each thrust of his fingers his mind wanders further, the need to see you falling apart leading his mouth back onto you, the combining sensation making you moan louder. 

The stretch of his fingers has your head spinning, eyes falling shut as you mewl on his sheets, fingers raking through his hair. “More Jungkook, please,” you whimper, not able to get enough of him. 

The desperation lacing your voice makes Jungkook’s heart flutter, ready to comply with anything you want. He moans against your folds, a third finger adding to the delicious stretch. The wet clicks of his fingers thrusting into your drenched pussy fill the room, and it's the greed living inside of Jungkook that makes him want to thrust into you faster, make it so that all you can hear is the sound of your pleasure. 

Your breath hitches in your throat when he curves his fingers upwards, tickling the sweet spot that makes your eyes roll. That’s when you feel the familiar cool sensation of his rings once more. You were used to feeling them on your arms when he playfully pulled you around, used to the feeling of them on your cheeks when he gripped your face before kissing you, but feeling them against your cunt each time he thrust his fingers forward, it made your body burn up with lust. There was something about having the name of a club you were told to stay far away from pressed against you salaciously that only made the waves of pleasure you feel crash over you even harder. 

“Mm, close Jungkook,” you whine, your free hand sliding up your body to tug and pinch at your nipples. Jungkook peers up at you from between his thighs and the visual of you playing with yourself while he ate you out has him making a mess in his underwear. He doesn’t even care how easy it is for you to make him this needy, knowing you were enjoying yourself because of him was all that mattered. 

“Wanna feel you baby,” he mutters out, lips shiny with your arousal, fingers scissoring inside of you, feeling the way your walls tighten around him. Your hands grip his hair tighter, making him hiss, a breathy laugh hitting your messy folds when you guide his mouth back onto you. 

Jungkook knows you’re right on the edge, the craving for your release making you arch your back, moans of his name slurring together with pleas for more more. All it takes is a few more flicks of his tongue for your climax to crest, the prettiest moan he’s ever heard reaching his ears as you gush around his fingers. 

“There you go, good girl,” he groans, pulling back as he licks his lips, staring at your trembling body with eyes swimming with lust. His thumb replaces his mouth, rubbing your swollen clit, enjoying the way you writhe at the slight overstimulation. 

“Ah, ‘Guk,” you whimper. And the new nickname has him smiling, loving the way it sounds coming from you so much he almost doesn’t want to stop. It takes your small hands coming down to grip his wrist for him to finally pull away, your soft giggles of enjoyment coming to a halt when he slips his fingers into his mouth. 

“Told you I needed more than just a bite,” he teases, making an absolute show of licking his fingers. “What about you, are you satisfied?”

You lift yourself up with one arm, the other reaching forward to grip his belt loop, tugging him closer as you look up at him through your lashes. “Mm, no I don’t think I am.” His abs tense when your finger trails along his skin, toying with the button on his jeans, slowly popping them open and pulling down the zipper. 

“Then I need to fix that,” he mumbles, tongue flicking his lip ring as he stares down at you, watching the way you reach down to palm at his bulge. Your face lights up at his words, a smile spreading on your face as he helps you tug down his jeans, obviously eager. Jungkook’s smirk only deepens when your eyes widen once you finally release his cock, a small gasp escaping you at the size of him. 

Pearly beads of precum collect at his tip, swollen and aching for your touch, so when you finally grasp his length and swipe your thumb along the bulbous tip he lets out a deep groan that has your core clenching. 

“Fuck, babe.” He grunts when your palm starts to slide up and down, his eyes focused on the way you slowly inch forward, your tongue peeking out to gently lick his tip. Jungkook knows he’s in trouble, already feeling his body react to your touch. All you had done was give him a few teasing touches and his mind was already spinning. Its an inner battle as he watches you take more of him into your mouth, his jaw dropping at the warm feeling, hands clenching by his side when you moan at the taste of him. 

“Y/N,” he groans, “you’re gonna make me cum too fast.” You pop off of him with a wet smack, a saccharine smile on your lips as you giggle. 

“And that’s a bad thing?” Your head tilts as you question him, hand still lazily pumping his length. 

“It is when I want to fuck you first.” That makes your hand finally stop, brows raising in interest. Your free hand slides up his body, carefully cupping his face, guiding him down to kiss you. 

“Then fuck me, Jungkook. I’m yours,” you murmur against his lips, feeling him groan against you as he kisses you harder. You know what you mean. You’re his for the night, despite how strong your connection with him is, the reality was that as long as Minho had his claws sunk into you, there would never be a chance for you and Jungkook to delve deeper into this relationship. But this tiny bubble you were both in was enough for you. 

The energy is different than what you’re used to, the both of you smiling through the kisses, soft words whispered against skin as you help him take off his jeans. Jungkook’s laugh is infectious when you gasp at the sight of his thighs, the double headed wolf tattoo catching your attention immediately, praising it under your breath before he’s kissing you once more, telling you he’ll let you properly see it later as his hands grope your sides. 

“How do you want me?” you mumble, gently nipping his lip. 

“If it was my way I’d have you in every position I could think of. You tell me, baby.” If Jungkook let his selfish desires take over, he’d tell you he wanted you to ride him, let you bounce on top of him and use him while he got to watch your pretty face. But he can’t be that selfish, even if the small pestering voice in his head tells him that this might be his only chance to. Still, his eyes are soft as he pulls back, ringed hand caressing your face with a tenderness that makes your heart clench

“Can I ride you?” Your voice is timid, just above a whisper, but it makes Jungkook shut his eyes and groan. You see, he wasn’t corny, didn’t believe in fate or anything like that, but for a brief moment Jungkook's convinced this was meant to be. 

“Fuck,” he groans, leaning forward to rest his forhead against yours. “Yes, please.”

The way he begs makes your pussy ache, hips instinctively rolling up into his, enjoying the way he hisses, rutting his cock against your inner thigh. The beads of precum leak off his tip, leaving a small puddle by your hip, smeared around as he repeats the action. 

“O-okay,” you gasp, biting down on your lip as you peek at the visual, trying not to get lost in the way he teases himself. “Let me ‘Guk, wanna feel you.”

He nods, tendrils of hair tickling your face as he kisses you again before leaning back. You try not to stare but it's so hard when he looks like that, length hard and bobbing as he rummages through the drawer by his bed, a sheepish smile on his lips when he plucks out a shiny square packet. 

Your heart races in your chest as you sit up, coming onto your knees and crawling to the head of the bed, gently patting the space next to you. Jungkook’s quick to settle beside you, back leaning against the small headboard, large hands reaching to grab your hips and hoist you over his thighs. A small laugh escapes you at being manhandled, the toned muscles of his thighs felt underneath you, his cock poking at your belly from your proximity. 

Your eyes are glued to it, watching in awe as he pulls out the condom and carefully rolls it on, a small sigh meeting your ears. 

“Can’t wait to feel you,” you whisper, pressing a kiss to his jaw, your hand meeting his around his cock as you lift your hips just enough. His free hand finds your hip again as you guide his tip to your entrance, teasingly circling it, slipping the tip inside for a second before popping it back out, the two of you gasping at the feeling. 

“Mm, sit on it,” he groans, brows pinched together as he nudges his nose into your neck. Wet kisses mark your skin, his hand getting tighter on your hip when you repeat the action again before finally sinking further down. Your walls clench around him, the stretch making you whine. You had seen his size, knowing just how big he was, but now that he’s inside of you and you feel it, you pace yourself. 

It's unintentionally torturous, the warm tightness slowly enveloping more of him and all he could do was clench his jaw and grip you harder. Jungkook is patient, fighting every urge he has to thrust up or sit you down fully. Instead he murmurs praises into your skin, tells you how good you feel, how good you’re doing, that you’re almost there until you’re butt rests flush against his thighs. 

A shuddering breath hits his shoulder, your face coming up to stare at him properly now. He’s staring at you with hooded eyes, mouth slightly opened as he gasps when your walls flutter. 

“So big,” you mumble, kissing him gently, lips ghosting over his, hips slowly lifting an inch before coming back down. 

“I know, baby. Take your time.” He groans, kissing you harder, teeth clicking together in his haste, breathing into each other. Jungkook felt like he was dreaming, some sick fantasy teasing him while he slept, giving him a taste of you before reality would settle in and snatch it all away. But you don’t usually feel this way in his dreams, don’t dig your nails into his shoulder as you quicken your pace, your wetness dripping down his cock and pooling at the base. And Jungkook is glad that he prefers reality over his dreams for once. 

“Oh god ‘Guk,” you moan, skin slapping together with each rise and fall of your hips. His lips are coated in a sheen of spit, swollen from your kisses and gentle bites, but he gives you a smile, clearly enjoying your reaction to him. 

“Does it feel good baby?” he murmurs, voice deep and raspy at the edges, his hand sliding up your thighs, pressing into your tummy with a tilt to his head. “Feel nice and full?”

You shudder at his question, feeling the pressure of his palm, and you swear you can feel the tip of his cock nudging into it. “Y-yes, so good, so full. Just wanna fuck you forever.”

He hums, feeling your words deep inside of him. It makes him melt into the headboard, hand traveling further up until he has a handful of your tits in them. Jungkook plays with them a bit, finger pinching and twisting the hard buds, tugging gently at the silver bar, hearing you moan at the sensation. 

“You can fuck me whenever you want,” he grunts at a particular drop of your hips, the wetness aiding in your pace. 

“Really?”

“Mhm,” he groans, thumb rolling along your nipple, softly rutting up into you. “Just text me whenever you want it. Pretty face, delicious pussy, I’ll always be here for you.”

“You’re such a romantic,” you giggle, throwing your head back as you get lost in the motion. Jungkook laughs with you, arm scooping around your back to pull you closer, his mouth kissing up and down your neck, teeth grazing the surface with the urge to suck but he knows better. 

“Just for you,” he breathes into your skin, feeling you laugh again. 

It feels like nothing else matters, not the potential consequences to this, no worry about what this meant for your special friendship. All that matters is that Jungkook is grabbing you like he can’t get enough of you, kissing you like his life depends on it, not shy at all at vocalizing how good it all feels. 

“Wanna cum,” you gasp, cupping his face, seeing the way he focuses on your lips as you speak. 

“Yeah? Tell me what you need.” He bends his knees slightly, pressure on his heels as he fucks up into you. The jiggle of your tits makes his mouth water, caught in a daze. 

“Need you to touch me.” It's the softest plea, tone dripping and needy, making Jungkook nod immediately. He bites his lip as he trails a hand up your chest, over your neck until he’s cupping your jaw, his thumb rubbing along your lower lip. With a gentle tap, you’re opening up, eyes locked together as you wrap your lips around the digit and suck, giving him a teasing bite as he tries to pull it out. 

He smiles at you, bringing down his soaked thumb in between your bodies until it reaches home directly onto your clit. The sudden touch makes you gasp, bundle of nerves swollen and sensitive, and its almost too much. But he’s gentle, easing you into the feeling, only applying more pressure when you finally relax, falling back into the delicious rhythm you have going. 

Jungkook can feel the coil tightening inside of him with each pulse of your pussy, walls clamping around him on each lift, making an absolute mess as the arousal drips onto his balls. 

“More?” He quickens his finger, circling your clit faster, paying close attention to your reaction. 

“Oh, fuck. No, like that. Just like that.” So he does, jaw dropped open as he watches you get lost in it all, bouncing on top of him as fast as you wanted, using him just like he wanted. Your thighs burn but it feels too good to think about stopping, the beginning signs of your orgasm licking at your skin, encouraging you to fuck him faster. You can hear how messy you’re leaving him, the squelch of your pussy blending in with the moans and thumping of the headboard. 

“Close, fuck—ah,” you stutter and gasp, brows pinched together tightly, only able to stare at him as you start to fall apart. He looks at you in awe, breathing in time with you, matching each gasp and moan, thumb slipping around in your slick. It's the accidental flick of his that has you tumbling over the edge, nearly shrieking out his name as your high comes barreling at you. 

Jungkook curses under his breath as you tremble above him. Your hand curls into his hair, yanking him forward into a messy kiss as you moan unabashedly, his thumb continuing to flick along your puffy clit for another minute to work you through it before he’s clutching onto your hips and controlling your speed. You’re still twitching at the aftershocks, small sparks kissing your skin and leaving you in a comfortable haze as you tangle your tongue with his, pulling back with a smile so sweet. 

“I wanna see you cum Jungkook,” you kiss him again, teasing him as you pull away and watch him chase you for more. “Made me feel so good, want you to cum for me.”

Jungkook groans, nodding as he wraps his arm around you, pushing off the headboard until the air is whooshing around you and your back is meeting the sheets once more. He cages you in easily, arms under your back, cradling your head as he buries his face into your neck and surges his hips into you. 

Your breath leaves you at the change in position, legs wrapping around his hips, shuddering as his pelvis nudges your sensitive clit. He doesn’t care how desperate he looks, fucking you like he was starved of affection, the need to cum taking over all of his senses. 

“Fuck, you’re so hot.” Your nails dig into his back, scratching along his skin, making him groan into your ear. His thrusts grow more sporadic, shallow, losing their grace as your purposefully clench around him. 

“Oh shit, you’re gonna make me cum.” He whines, voice breathy against your neck, and you swear you’ll cum again. 

“Yeah? Cum for me, c’mon,” you whisper, grazing his back and tightening your walls again. He nods against you before he’s leaning back, giving you the view you so sweetly asked for. His thick brows are furrowed on his forehead, eyes heady with lust, and a deep groan of your name spilling past his lips as he cums. Your feet urge him closer as his hips stutter, rutting into you to milk his orgasm as he fills up the condom. 

The room falls quiet for a moment, the both of you catching your breath, hearts slowing down as the high settles over your bones. And then he’s laughing, flopping back over you and tightening his hold on your body. 

“Why are you laughing?” You giggle too, hands running through his hair as you smile in a love sick daze. 

“I don’t think I’ve ever came that hard,” he admits sheepishly, kissing your warm skin, leaning back with a childish smile as he kisses your nose and ever so slowly starts to pull out of you. The sound is filthy, core sensitive and messy, and when he fully pulls out you can’t help but close your legs. 

He simply laughs, hand softly rubbing at your calves before he’s getting up and disposing of the condom. 

You’re still in that same foggy haze from earlier, even as Jungkook returns with a damp cloth to clean you up, all you can do is hum in thanks as you melt into his sheets. It doesn’t take long for him to settle in beside you again, holding you close, hand tickling the skin of the thigh you have hooked over his hip. 

“You have such pretty legs.” It’s a soft compliment, almost like it wasn’t meant to escape him. But when you look at him with a sincere smile he continues. “If you were mine I’d beg you to wear skirts all the time just so I could stare at them, touch them—“ he grips your thighs playfully, smiling at your laugh, “I’d be able to flick it up so easily and fuck you in it.”

Your laugh is louder now, your hand playfully swatting at his chest at how quick he was to get raunchy. 

If you were mine. 

That phrase repeats in your mind, sounding like a sweet song that you’d never get tired of hearing. 

“I’ll wear one at the meet next week,” you promise, running your hand over his chest. You knew you’d be seeing him there, able to freely ogle at him with all the neighboring clubs gathered together in an attempt to keep the peace. You might not be able to interact like you usually do, but just seeing him was enough. 

Just as he’s about to reply, the sound of a familiar engine cuts the air. You freeze instantly, wide eyes staring at Jungkook, seeing the confused look on his face. He lifts a hand up, motioning for you to stay as he sits up straighter, ears perking up when he hears the front door of the clubhouse open up. 

“Stay here. They won’t come in here but I know they saw my bike so I’ll get rid of them.” You can only nod as he hurries into his clothes, buttoning his jeans in a haste and deciding to forgo his shirt and shoes as he all but runs out of the room, shutting the door behind him. 

The haze you felt earlier is long gone, anxiety settling into your bones once more, realizing just what sort of situation you were in. Jungkook seemed to think the golden rule of staying away from Cobras was fine with you, but who knows just what kind of loyalty the Six member in the other room holds. 

All you needed was one man hell bent on loyalty to come barging in, and you don’t even want to think of what would become of you. Your heart rattles in your chest as you sit up too, eyes glancing around the room to find your pile of clothes. 

You can hear them mumbling in the main room, Jungkook’s laughter sounding out as he jokes around with his fellow brother. You can only imagine what he’s telling him, maybe explaining why theres a second bike parked next to his, or giving his reason for being shirtless and disheveled at the clubhouse this late in the day. Whatever is going on, you know you shouldn’t wait around to see how it plays out. Being with Jungkook makes reality pause, fade away and leave you to believe that things were meant to be this easy. 

But that's not your reality. 

You knew you wanted this to happen, could still feel the butterflies in your stomach as you remember the way he kissed your skin. But you couldn’t let the line be crossed this far again. You’re not sure karma would be too kind to you the next time. 

As quiet as you can, you slip out of bed, carefully putting your clothes back on and looking at the desk in the corner. Before you overthink it, you grab the pen and notepad he has resting on top of paperwork, scribbling out a quick note before you’re returning to his bedside, yanking up the curtains and wiggling the window open to slip out. 

Back in the main room, Jungkook is sitting on the bar stool, Hoseok resting against the counter as they both joke around. Jungkook is thankful that Hoseok doesn’t seem to ask too many questions, knowing very well that he must have some girl in the room, but he wasn’t nosey enough to want to know who. 

“So you’re not gonna introduce your friend?” he jokes, giving Jungkook a coy smile, enjoying the way his younger friend blushes and shoves his shoulder. 

“No you weirdo, you fucking scared her by showing up like this. Why the hell are you here anyway?”

Hoseok cackles, pushing away from the counter and walking towards the meeting room. “Sorry, I didn't mean to be a cockblock. I forgot to grab some paperwork.” The way he says it makes it seem like it was work documents, contracts that needed to be signed instead of files detailing the amount of guns they’d be receiving in the next drop. He disappears into the room, returning a few moments later with the folder in his hand. “I’ll be out of your hair now.”

And he does just that, waving goodbye and stepping back outside. But as he approaches his bike he realizes the bike he had seen next to Jungkook’s was missing now. 

Jungkook is none the wiser as he walks back to his room, a smile on his face that falls when he doesn’t see you on the bed. The sheets are a mess, your clothes are missing, his curtains are drawn up and his window remains cracked open. He steps closer now, a white sheet of paper catching his attention on his desk. 

Thanks for the tour, I think your room might be my favorite<3 Remember, we take this to our graves. We’ll kiss on it over sour straws soon x

Ps. I’ll see you at the meet, I’ll be the one in the short skirt. 

Maybe it's the sick hopefulness he feels in his chest, but Jungkook can’t help but smile as he thinks this won’t be the last time afterall.

#deep six

[ittomi]

satisfy 06

summary⇢ “listen,” taehyung says, eyes wide and eager as he smiles at you. “i figure we can just help each other out. i scratch your back, you scratch mine.” but when you find yourself suddenly in need of a massive favor, exactly how much scratching are you willing to do? pairing⇢ seokjin/reader, namjoon/reader, taehyung/reader, …..jimin/reader word count⇢ 4.8k genre⇢ smut | escort!au | ceo!au (kinda) warnings⇢ none, really. just a few suggestive memories and oc having a crisis 👀 a/n⇢ and now, my dear friends, we finally make it to the epilogue! 🥹 thank you to everyone who has stuck with this fic over the years, and i'm extra grateful to everyone who has dropped in my inbox at any point to scream their feelings about it to me--as well as everyone who has enjoyed it enough to reblog and share! 💜💜 you guys are the ones who really keep me coming back to share my writing on this hellsite, and i truly, truly appreciate you for helping keep fandom fun and alive. i hope you've enjoyed this ride as much as i have enjoyed taking you on it! 🥰😈 mood for this chapter is this song~ thanks again, everyone! 💜

chapters⇢ previous | series masterlist

Just as they were scheduled to, your employers jetted off overseas, leaving you to your own devices for the next three weeks. You weren’t going to lie—it felt bizarre for your calendar to be so open after months of near bursting due to constant activity. But honestly? It was truly refreshing to suddenly have so much downtime. And after your last Kim encounter, you definitely felt your break was well-deserved.   

So, you used the sudden breathing room to catch up on other parts of your life that had been suffering. The next few days were spent burrowed beneath the covers and gloriously unconscious, your truly exhausted body ensuring sleep to be your first priority. Initiating the wildest sexual encounter you had ever had—and probably would ever have—on a Thursday meant that you luckily only had to miss one lecture, and you happily did so, knowing the slides would be online for you to look over later. And though you weren’t asleep the entire weekend, even when you were awake, you didn’t part with the comfort of your bed for long—eating takeout in it and watching true crime documentaries in it and actively ignoring the way your skin tingled when your mind strayed to the other activities you had done in it not too long prior. 

(And if you were being honest, it was a little hard to not linger on what you had done. On what you so easily allowed the Kims to do.) 

When you did allow yourself to linger on it, it almost felt like a fever dream. Some abstract, depraved fantasy that your overactive mind had cooked up. But the ache in your muscles, the tenderness of your pussy—these were tangible proof that it had all been real. That the flashes of hot tongues and gasping breaths and shivering pleasure that kept creeping back, no matter how you tried to distract yourself, were memories, not figments of your imagination. You knew you should probably feel some sort of shame over it, but honestly? Other than astonishment that this was what your life had become, other than the expected fatigue—

You only felt satisfied.

Satisfied that your own needs had been spectacularly met, of course, but also with the knowledge that your employers were even more satiated than you, and that you had done that. You couldn’t help but glow with a sense of pride when your doorbell rang one afternoon and you were handed a gorgeous flower arrangement, the corresponding card detailing that the unexpected, expensive gift was from Kim Seokjin. Months ago, you probably would have felt mortified to receive them—especially with the intimate knowledge of what exactly he was thanking you for—but you had earned those flowers, dammit! Earned that, as well as the absurd amount of money Namjoon unceremoniously wired you in between the texts he sent you every few days to check on you. 

You always gave your all to whatever you set out to do, and this was no different. You were a hard worker, period. No one could fault you for being pleased with the successful results of your efforts.     

So yes, you spent those next few days relaxing and recuperating and feeling rewarded. And when you finally felt enough like a human to leave your nest of pillows and blankets, you used your newfound freedom from distractions to catch up on other parts of your life you had been inadvertently ignoring—the first being your schoolwork, and the second, Jimin. 

You did a double-take when your text thread showed that the last time you had messaged him had been a week and a half ago, unbelieving. Though busy, the two of you never went that long without at least checking in, and for him to not reach out either? You couldn’t help but worry that maybe he had forgotten about you. Found someone much more interesting, someone prettier and much more available to be showered with his attention than you. 

But luckily, your slow spiraling was immediately halted when the timid Hey you sent him resulted in his bubbly, smiley face-filled reply barely a second later. 

And so now, there you were, meeting him in person for the first time in over a month.

“Sorry I’m late,” you told him as you approached the table, slightly out of breath from your hustle there. “Traffic was crazy and the Uber driver seemed afraid of driving, or something? Like, this probably isn’t the job for you if driving in the city makes you that nervous.” Because yes, when Jimin asked if you could meet him for dinner, you were surprised when he chose a spot downtown. And you were even more surprised when you finally arrived and realized that said restaurant was apparently an upscale hotspot, especially considering the meals you usually shared together consisted of nothing fancier than takeout or something you could grab from the convenience store.

He immediately stood up to wrap you in his arms, giving you a comforting squeeze that reflexively had you melting into the warmth of him before he let go. God, he smelled good. “Glad you made it in one piece,” came his amused reply, eyes twinkling as he reached over and politely pulled your chair out for you.  

You did your best to tamp down the familiar delighted butterflies that always sprung up within you when you were near him. There was something more pressing that needed to be addressed. “Jimin,” you hissed out the corner of your mouth, warily looking around. “You didn’t tell me this restaurant was so nice! I would’ve dressed up more.” Because as it was, your simple cocktail dress wasn’t really cutting it. The tables had cloth tablecloths that no doubt were removed and washed between each seating. There were multiple chandeliers sparkling from the ceiling, for fuck’s sake! Jimin had told you to wear something more on the nicer side, but he never told you this nice, and you could tell immediately that you were underdressed. You had been so excited to see him again that you just got in the car without even bothering to google the place first. 

Jimin waved a dismissive hand, visibly unbothered as he retook his own seat. For his part, he had actually taken the time to throw on a rather smart blazer over his dress shirt and slacks, his hair carefully styled and slicked back. “You look beautiful, as you always do.”

Your eyes shifted to the table, a shy but pleased smile inching across your lips. “Thank you.”

“Thank you for meeting me. I was worried you’d forgotten about me.”

You couldn’t help the incredulous snort that escaped you. “Me forget about you? No, of course not, Jiminie. I’m sorry for dropping off the face of the earth—I’ve just been so busy—”

Jimin’s raised hand halted your rambling, the gentle crinkle of his eyes calming your frazzled nerves. “Don’t worry,” he smiled. “I totally get it—I was just teasing. I could tell you had a lot going on, and so I just didn’t want to bother you. You have nothing to be sorry for.” 

Didn’t you, though? Would he feel the same way if he knew just what had been taking up all your time? You reflexively swallowed, sifting uncomfortably in your seat. “Yeah, school has been running me ragged.” And it’s not a lie. Just not the full truth.

“No kidding. I think I got seven hours of sleep total last week, so like I said, I totally get it.” Before it even registered that he was reaching for you, his hand was already enveloping yours, thumb rubbing soothing circles into your palm. “I’m just happy we have the chance to get together now. I missed you.” 

You felt yourself immediately soften into putty at his admission. “I’ve missed you too, Jimin,” came your soft reply. Dazedly, you tried your best not to visibly show how much his unexpected touch was making your heartbeat skyrocket, but from the pleased curl of his lips, you weren’t entirely sure you were successful. 

It didn’t matter, because just as easily as he had reached into your space, he was now letting go, pulling his appendage back to his side of the table to pick up his menu.  

As if waiting for a lull in your conversation, the waiter chose that moment to approach your table. “Welcome to Serendipity. Have the two of you dined with us before?”

“I haven’t,” Jimin replied, expectantly looking your way for your response and finding you scrabbling for your menu instead.

“Me neither,” you squeaked, flustered that you had been too busy making heart eyes at Jimin to even give it a cursory browse. “Is there anything you recommend?”

The waiter reached over a little to direct you a slip of paper on your table that had gone unnoticed until this moment. “You can find our current specials here—I’m a big fan of the salmon, but everything on there is excellent. And we’re actually currently running a dinner for two special, that’s been really popular. One appetizer to share, two entrées, and a dessert to share.”

Yes, it didn’t surprise you that that would be popular—along with how nice the restaurant was, you had noticed immediately when walking in that it was filled with couples who were clearly having romantic nights out.

“I think we’re still deciding on food.” Jimin’s voice cut through your thoughts. “But can we please see a wine list?”

Wine? Your brow raised, not opposed, but surprised. In all the time you’ve known each other, alcohol has certainly never been a stranger—you’ve had late night study sessions together, accompanied by chicken and beer; you’ve gotten shitfaced together at bars after particularly rough exams. But something about this felt…different. In this restaurant, much fancier than you anticipated, surrounded by couples, sitting across a candlelit table from where Jimin was poring over a wine selection that you knew had to be really expensive—this was undoubtedly more intimate.  

You idly cleared your throat, not daring to linger too long on the dots your mind couldn’t help but connect. Because it obviously couldn’t be that. It had to be a coincidence.

“_____,” Jimin said, the slight raise in his voice cluing you in that this wasn’t the first time he had tried to get your attention. “How does this one sound?” 

You blinked our of your thoughts, finding both him and the waiter looking at you expectantly. “Whatever you choose is fine!” you croaked, slapping on a smile for good measure.    

“Excellent choice. I’ll bring it right out,” the waiter said with an affirmative tilt of his head, and then the two of you were alone again. 

It was quiet for a bit while you both properly perused your menus, though from the corner of your eye, the curious glances Jimin was sending you didn’t escape your notice. You were acting weird. You were acting weird and he could clearly tell you were acting weird, but ever since you noticed the restaurant’s romantic atmosphere, you couldn’t help it.

“These prices are kinda wild, huh?” came your attempt at normal conversation.

Jimin took it in stride, lips curling in amusement. “Yeah, they’re definitely overcharging for those stuffed mushrooms. But don’t worry about it—I invited you out, so this is my treat.”

You shook your head immediately. “No, no, I can’t let you do that! I was just making a comment. Don’t worry, I have enough money to pay.”

He let out a bemused sigh, shaking his head, and if you didn’t happen to be looking directly at him, you might have missed him say under his breath, “You’re not gonna make this date easy for me, huh?”

You immediately choked on your own spit, eyes bugging at what you thought you heard. “D-Date?” you repeated incredulously.

Jimin’s spine went stiff, eyes widening as if he hadn’t meant to say that out loud. You could only watch in amazement as it was his turn to look shy, pointedly averting his gaze to his menu and letting out a chuckle that sounded suspiciously nervous to your bemused ears. When you continued to gape at him, waiting for some sort of explanation, he was forced to continue.

“Yeah,” he hedged cautiously. “That’s what I’d hoped. Would that be a bad thing?”

You couldn’t answer right away, staring him down like he had grown two heads and wondering when he was going to burst out laughing with a Gotcha! You should have seen your face.  

Always one for great timing, the waiter chose that moment to come back with your wine, taking his sweet time pouring it into each of your glasses and cheerfully chatting about the region it came from. You didn’t hear a single word, too focused on the way Jimin studiously avoided your stare, on the noticeable flush that had risen up his neck and was fanning across his cheeks. It was only after you apologetically asked for more time for your meal orders—your mind too frazzled to pick something on the spot—that he left again. Jimin took a long swig from his wineglass.

“Sorry,” he murmured, still not looking at you. “I probably should have let you know my intention beforehand, but I was nervous you wouldn’t come, or I’d chicken out of doing it, or—”

“Your intention?” you parroted dazedly. 

Another generous swallow of wine, the liquid courage coaxing his eyes to meet yours. “I wanted to take you out somewhere really nice,” he admitted. “Show you a good time and work up the nerve to properly ask you out again.”

“On a. Date?” Your lashes fluttered, an involuntary response to your brain short-circuiting. “With me.”

His lips twitched. “Yes, with you, silly.”

“Why?”

“You’re really going to make me say it? Before our food gets here?” He was fiddling with his napkin, but despite his clear nervousness, his gaze was now unwavering and his voice was clear. “Because I like you, _____. I have for a long time.”

These were words that you had only heard him whisper in your wildest dreams, when your subconscious thoughts were no longer being restrained by your common sense. And as such, you could only gape at him, sure you were about to wake up any second.

Your unintentional silence triggered Jimin’s tongue into overdrive, and you could only struggle to make sense of his rambling as he proceeded to tell you how much your friendship meant to him and how he was afraid confessing how he felt would affect it, but he just couldn’t take it anymore. How his feelings for you were growing by the day, and the recent time spent away from you was maddening and only confirmed to him how much he wanted to be with you. And so he felt he had to at least put it out there and try.

And the longer he talked, the more your eyes welled up with horrified tears, panic gripping you by the throat and squeezing, tight, tight.

This was nothing short of a nightmare. 

You would have never agreed to your arrangement with the Kims if you had thought in a million years Jimin would have ever been a serious option for you. 

Absolutely not. You would have swallowed your pride, maybe taken that loan from Tae instead. Would have also taken as many odd jobs as you could to pay him back, would have forgone sleep completely and struggled a ten times more than you were now just so you could pay off your debts. Hell, you would have even just fucking dropped out. Would have taken the semester off and attempted to come back whenever you could scrounge up the appropriate funds. 

But never, never ever, would you have done what you had done. 

Because now, not only were you contractually unable to be with the man you’ve—in an attempt at self-preservation—refused to acknowledge you were in love with, but even if you found some legal way to quit now…there was zero chance Jimin would still want you when he knew. Less than zero. And you couldn’t blame him for that, because who would?

Beyond overwhelmed, you did the only sensible thing you could in that moment—you burst into tears.

Your sudden sniveling immediately halted Jimin’s rambling, eyes wide in alarm and looking every bit as distressed as you. “Ah—don’t cry!” He leaned over the table, cradling your face in his hands and swiping your tears with his thumbs. “You don’t have to feel the same way, _____. I’ll get over it, please don’t cry—”

“No,” you blubbered, beyond miserable. He couldn’t be more wrong. “I do! Jimin, I feel exactly the same way, I just…” Your eyes welled up anew, unable to tell him the truth. “I c-can’t.” 

“You can’t?” he repeated, eyebrows furrowing in confusion. His eyes roved your face for any possible answers, nibbling slightly on his bottom lip in thought. “…Is this…” His thumbs were still caressing your cheeks, gaze gentle and open as he quickly glanced around to see if anyone was paying the two of you any attention. When it was clear no one was giving your table more than a few curious glances, he said quieter, “…Is this about the arrangement you have with Tae?”

Everything froze. Your eyes locked, Jimin patiently waiting for your reply. Hysteria trickled through your veins, held only a bay by the disbelief slamming into you harder than a freight train. “W-What arrangement?” you blurted reflexively, a touch too loudly to be believable. 

It was Jimin’s turn be caught off guard, hands slowly dropping from your face and returning to his side of the table, though he was still leaned over it so he could still whisper to you, “You know.” He looked at you pointedly, mouth downturning a bit in his confusion. “With him and his brothers. The arrangement.” 

Jesus Christ, this was not happening. There was no way that this was actually happening to you. There was no way that the man who unknowingly held your heart in the palm of his hand was fully aware that you were fucking his best friend for money. Deny, deny! “I’m not sure I know what you mean.”

He didn’t say anything for a few moments, still visibly puzzled. But the two of you only sat in an awkward silence for a few more moments before he snapped his fingers, a light bulb clearly going off. “Ah! You can’t say anything because you signed an NDA, right?” 

You swallowed thickly, unable do anything more in that very moment than stupidly stare at him like a deer in the headlights. 

“I’m sorry, that was stupid of me,” Jimin chuckled, smacking his forehead for good measure. “I don’t know why I didn’t realize that sooner. Obviously you’re under NDA.” 

You weren’t sure how to respond to that. Weren’t sure from the gentle smile he was now sending you if he even expected a response from you. Luckily, Jimin kept talking. 

“But it’s okay—I already know everything, so you don’t have to hide it,” he reassured you. You didn’t feel assured. You felt like you were in the Twilight Zone. “Taehyung told me about your agreement when you started it months ago.”

If you were flustered before, that was nothing on what you were feeling now. Now, half-thoughts were ricocheting across your brain too quickly for you to grasp anything of substance but your internal screeching. “You know everything?” you repeated incredulously. This time it was you who leaned over the table, meeting him in the middle. “Taehyung told you?!”

“Of course he did!” Color rebloomed across his cheeks, but he didn’t shy away from the bewildered stare down you were giving him. “He’s my best friend and he wanted to make sure he wouldn’t be stepping on any toes. He…knows how I feel about you.” When you only continued to stare at him, he nervously added, “Who do you think got me the reservation for this place to begin with? The waitlist is literally a year out.”

“I’m sorry, I just—” You pulled back so you could reach for your wineglass, allowing yourself a few healthy sips to give your mouth something to do other than flap about like an idiot while you stalled. Jimin didn’t call you out on it, just waited patiently and topped off your glass when you set it back down again. 

You took a few steadying breaths, ultimately choosing to lean back closer to Jimin. To the casual onlooker, the two of you were just another couple making heart eyes over a romantic dinner. And considering the rather lewd and illegal turn your conversation had just taken in this very public place, that only worked in your favor. “Let me get this straight,” you whispered, carefully choosing your words in case you still managed to garner an unwanted audience. “Taehyung told you the deal he has with me. Months ago.” Jimin nodded. “And you’ve known this entire time about our…arrangement, but never told me you knew.”

“I swear I didn’t at all mean to keep that a secret,” he murmured, expression contrite. “I just didn’t want to make you uncomfortable or embarrass you or anything like that, so I’ve just been waiting on you to bring it up at your own pace. But I didn’t take into account that you would never bring it up because you would be under NDA, which, again, now that I say it out loud was an extremely stupid assumption of me not to make. I’m sorry.”

“So. You have feelings for me,” you reiterated, ignoring the delighted shiver that raced up your spine at the words. You had to be sure. “But it didn’t bother you that your best friend…propositioned me? You have no problem with me being…involved with him and his brothers?”

“You were caught between a rock and a hard place and the grind never stops. You know I know that better than anybody,” he replied with a shrug. He swallowed, discreetly ensuring no one was paying the two of you any attention before he added, “You think you’re the only one who’s sucked dick for money?”

Your eyes widened, jaw dropping a little before you could catch it. Was he…implying what you thought he was implying? There was no way. You had to be reading into it. 

But ultimately, all of this was irrelevant. When the ghost of Seokjin’s mouth on you came to you unbidden—the phantom weight of Taehyung’s body, the haunting reprimand of Namjoon’s stern hand—

You shook your head, unsuccessfully dispelling those unwanted, lingering thoughts. Your gaze skirted to the table, despondent and embarrassed as you finally set free your hushed admission. “Jimin, I’ve done more than suck dick for my money.” 

There was a pause, an agonizing one that felt like an eternity, and then he was lifting your chin with a finger and guiding you to meet his eyes.

“Again.” He reached for your hands, thumb tracing patterns over your knuckles. His smile was a soft secret. “You think you’re the only one?” 

He held your gaze, not looking away even though your mouth just flapped uselessly as you struggled to regain your bearings. So he did mean—

“Does knowing that bother you?” Jimin asked quietly, expression now carefully neutral. Seriously asking, and giving you the proper space to process and answer. “Does it change anything?”

“No.” The truth, though delayed, left you as easily as a breath. He was still Jimin. “Of course not.”

Jimin’s resulting grin turned his eyes into crescents. “Soooo…what I’m hearing is that we’re clearly on the same page and are both Team Fuck Bitches, Get Money.” 

Boy, did you wish you could smile back. Wish you could share in his obvious relief. But while you assumed his exploits were in the past, the same couldn’t be said for you, who was actively under contract. “Jimin, I’m still…employed,” you couldn’t help but point out. “And still will be for a while. That really doesn’t bother you?”

“It really doesn’t,” he insisted. But your continued hesitance had him pulling back from you, hands busying themselves with reaching for his wineglass as he carefully asked, “Should it? Is there something else I should know?” A couple sips of wine to steel himself before a  cautious, “Do you have feelings for any of them?”

“No!” you blurted. Despite the amount of time and intimacy you had been spending with the Kims, romantic feelings had never even crossed your mind. Your pussy certainly felt some things when she was getting some action, but your heart had never gotten involved. Your heart was too busy crowding in your throat at that very moment, threatening to fling itself at the man in front of you.

Jimin took your sincerity for what it was, a pleased twist to his lips. “Then it’s all fine with me. And again, Tae’s been aware from the beginning that I’ve been intending to ask you out, so that expectation has been there since the beginning. All three of them agreed to the deal knowing that I might be in the picture if I ever decided to put my big boy pants on and tell you how I feel. They’ve been expecting it, so they’re cool with it.”

“They’re cool with it,” you parroted blankly, completely flabbergasted. This was absolutely not how you foresaw this night going, and you never would have thought your life would ever take a turn like this in a million years. “They’re cool with it, and so are you?”

“I don’t mind sharing your time,” he shrugged. “So long as I’m not sharing you.”

“And you don’t see that as the same thing in this…situation?” you asked incredulously. “That doesn’t seem fair.”

Jimin puffed out an amused laugh. “Wow, you really are trying to talk me out of this, huh?”

You waved your hands. “Absolutely not, that is the last thing I want! I just. I come with a lot of baggage, and I don’t want any of it to come as a surprise. As busy as I’ve been the last couple weeks? That’s becoming a reoccurring normal. And Jimin, I just feel really shitty.” You swallowed. “Because I can’t promise you everything that you deserve to be promised right now.”

Jimin’s face softened as he listened to you, visibly much more comfortable now that you had successfully reassured him just how badly you wanted this. And oh, did you want it. You weren’t sure how this could ever work, but god did you want it to.

“Not fair,” he repeated under his breath, eyes glazed over in thought. “Hmmm.” 

“Is there anything I could do?” you hedged. You weren’t really sure what that could possibly be, considering the ironclad situation you were in. But now that you had been given a glimmer of your heart’s desire, you couldn’t let it fade away. Not if you could help it.  

His reply wasn’t immediate, still lost in thought. But when his eyes finally refocused on you, smoldering and intense, you couldn’t help the way your breath caught in response, the way your heart quickened. “Here’s an idea of what we can do to make it fair. What if you continue to work for them, just as you are now. And then…” 

He was thoughtlessly swirling his wineglass, momentum pulling the ruby liquid into slow, circling waves that would be rather hypnotizing if you weren’t already caught in the snare of his gaze. When he leaned across the table again, the way you followed suit was as easy as breathing. A lovesick sailor willingly lured to possible danger by a siren’s song. “Whatever you do for them, you do for me. How does that sound?” 

You let out a soft breath, just the thought of it immediately electrifying your every atom. Sparks danced excitedly beneath your skin, his soft, sultry tone curling your toes in their shoes. 

“Fair.”

His Adam’s apple dipped excitedly, lips parting.

“So sorry to interrupt,” someone suddenly said from beside you. It was the waiter again. You had completely forgotten about him. Completely forgotten everything other than the restless tap of Jimin’s fingers against the table. “I just wanted to check in to see if you were ready to order?” 

“Yes, I think so.” You didn’t look away from Jimin—still hadn’t even glanced at the menu. Your tongue swiped over your lips, and his gaze darkened in response. 

“But I think we’d like it to go.”

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#satisfy

[ittomi]

—chapter nineteen: illicit affairs

this is a part of my an ode to a broken heart drabble series.

pairing: jeon jungkook/reader genre: unrequited love, best friends to (?), heavy angst, smut word count: 1.6k words summary: it dies a million little times…

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Continua a leggere

#an ode to a broken heart

[ittomi]

satisfy 05

summary⇢ “listen,” taehyung says, eyes wide and eager as he smiles at you. “i figure we can just help each other out. i scratch your back, you scratch mine.” but when you find yourself suddenly in need of a massive favor, exactly how much scratching are you willing to do? pairing⇢ seokjin/reader, namjoon/reader, taehyung/reader, …..jimin/reader word count⇢ 15.9k genre⇢ smut | escort!au | ceo!au (kinda) warnings⇢ 😇😇😇😇 *chin hands sweetly* STRAP IN, FOLKS!!: GANGBANG. this chapter will include three brothers having sex with the reader at the same time (but not with each other). if this bothers you, please feel free to skip!, rough sex, unprotected sex, oral (f+m giving/receiving), fingering, face fucking, exhibitionism, voyuerism, da booty getting ate like groceries, assplay, name calling, daddy kink, orgasm denial, forced orgasm, marking, spitroasting, cumplay, bukakke 😭, honestly this is a hot ass MESS and i should be sorry but i’m not 🤷🏽‍♀️ a/n⇢ well, hello~ long time no see!!!! i'm super pumped about this chapter because it has literally been in the works since i planned this whole fic out years ago 😭 a lot of planning and struggling later, and WE FINALLY HERE 🙌🏾 🙌🏾 i am so relieved that this finally exists in the world and not just in my head lmao. thank you all for hanging with me for this long and being so patient. i hope this chapter lives up to your expectations 😈 only the epilogue left! 😮‍💨👀 mood for this chapter is this song~ hope everyone enjoys!

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Days quickly morphed into weeks, time continuing to flow even without you consciously noticing it pass you by. You were just so busy, both your schoolwork and your unconventional part-time job a whirlwind of activity that left you too preoccupied to do much else. Your already scant social life was starting to suffer, but honestly? You were completely fine with that—a neverending schedule of sex, sleep, and studying was more than enough, and it was highly unlikely you would be able to fit anything else onto your overflowing plate anyway.

It was expected for you to not have that much free time, anyway. Jimin’s was waning too, the further the two of you got into your studies, the busier you both became. You still texted often to make sure each other was alive, but with your differing schedules, the new normal became not getting to see him in person for weeks on end.

You’d be lying if you said you weren’t losing steam. Burning the candle at both ends was finally starting to catch up with you, but there wasn’t much you could do about it other than focusing on powering through it. This was the career path you chose—your dream—and so you simply just had to bear everything that came along with it. You were willing to put the work in to reach your goals, and you just kept reminding yourself that how you were living now was just a means to an end. 

Not that you at all only found the Kims to be a means to an end. Yes, they were paying your way through school, but you still really enjoyed the time you spent with each of them. They were all great company in different ways, and at this point, the only time you were freed from the library’s clutches was when one of them wanted to take you somewhere, so you found them to be more of a welcome distraction than anything else. 

Unfortunately, that still didn’t change the fact that at the end of the day, you were bone tired.

You had always been good at compartmentalizing. But though you tried your best to not let your slowly-building fatigue show, even your new employers could tell that you were being ran a bit ragged. Namjoon came to pick you up for a date one day, and all it took was one long look at you while you were trying to buckle your seatbelt for him to put the car in park and hustle you back upstairs instead, despite your protests. You thought that maybe he decided to forgo your movie plans for much more carnal activities, but once you were back inside your apartment, he sprawled himself onto your couch and reached for you. You were confused, but when you reflexively took his hand, he simply pulled you down with him and easily folded you into his body. 

God, he smelled good. And was comfortable and warm, so it didn’t take long for you to nod off, despite only being fifteen minutes into whatever Netflix movie he had put on. Namjoon spent his scheduled date letting you snore into his chest, and when you woke up hours later, groggy and discombobulated, you found him already gone and a blanket thrown over you.

It didn’t take a genius to realize he must have said something to his brothers. The next day, seemingly out of the blue, you got an email notification that Wendy, Seokjin’s assistant, had canceled an upcoming work lunch that had been on the calendar for weeks. (You highly doubted the lunch itself was canceled—just that Jin had decided to go alone.) And you were so used to Taehyung’s frequent visits that when he didn’t stop by for four days in a row, it became blatantly obvious that something was amiss. 

They were giving you space.

But if you were honest, though you appreciated the sudden breathing room in your schedule, all of them suddenly pulling out of the arrangement was making you uneasy. This was a job, after all, and you weren’t fully holding up your end of the bargain. Hell, the week before was your period, so you hadn’t slept with any of them then, either. And, considering the fact that all three Kims were set to go on an overseas business trip soon, the amount of leave you were inadvertently taking was quickly adding up.  

You needed this money. You needed this money, this was not what they agreed to, and you were nervous you were starting to frustrate them.

To their credit, none of them ever seemed to be. Early on, when your period made its first appearance as the perpetual wrench in your plans, Seokjin had casually informed you that he was totally fine with just putting a towel down. However, when he saw you weren’t nearly as enthused with the idea, he simply gave you an easy shrug and said, “Then take whatever time you need.” His brothers had been equally as accommodating, and have been ever since (though Taehyung sometimes still liked to playfully pout at you when you told him Aunt Flo was in town).

But the fact was, you ultimately weren’t holding up your end of the bargain, and that knowledge was constantly hovering in the back of your mind and making you a bit anxious. That was why, days before he was scheduled to leave for his two week business trip, you took initiative and asked Taehyung if he wanted to come over. 

Both Seokjin and Namjoon had already graciously canceled their standing appointments with you for the second week in a row, but Taehyung had never had a standing appointment. He was always much more spontaneous than his brothers, and that personality trait was no different when it came to you, so that’s what you were counting on.

[1:32] Hey! Did you want to come over tomorrow? [1:32] Or later today, I guess

Despite it being so late, Tae apparently hadn’t gone to bed yet. He was a bit of a night owl, like you.

Taehyung [1:34] Well hello~ Taehyung [1:34] So nice to hear from you, sweetcheeks. How’s it been going? [1:35] Sweetcheeks, Taehyung? Really? Taehyung [1:35] What? They’ve always looked pretty sweet to me 😌👀

You scoffed, amused and fond. Always an incorrigible flirt, that one.

[1:35] Yeah, okay lol  [1:36] So if they’re so sweet, what are you gonna do about it?

A pause, one slightly too long for someone whose phone was in their hand and had been actively responding to you only moments before. You knew you had him even before his reply finally came through.

Taehyung [1:37] What time?

The next day, you focused on getting as much of your work done as you could before the hard stop of when you knew you had to start getting ready. You took a long shower, letting the hot water relax your stiff muscles before carefully maneuvering into the lingerie that was still prettily packaged in the bag from the boutique you got it from, untouched on the floor of your closet since you bought it.

You hadn’t seen him a while, so it only made sense to you to make things a little more exciting than usual. Spice it up. Honestly, sex with Taehyung was always anything with boring, but the thigh-highs you slipped into were just as much for you as him. You had been so focused on your studies that you couldn’t remember the last time you wore anything other than court-approved suits, sweatpants, or pajamas. It would be nice to feel something other than just tired again. To feel desired. Sexy.

And even you could admit the outfit you had chosen was sexy. A crimson, lacy bodysuit thing that did little to obscure the dusk of your nipples and disappeared between your asscheeks. The matching thigh-highs, joined with garters. You even had a pair of heels that you planned to wear—ones that made your legs look a mile long, but hurt like a bitch every time you attempted to wear them out. Despite their shortcomings, you were willing to slip on the deathtraps because luckily, for this particular occasion, you wouldn’t have to go anywhere in them, nor would they stay on you for very long. 

You were even planning on putting on a little makeup, on properly doing your hair for the first time in weeks and giving the bun you had been sporting a rest. However, all it took was a knock on your door to put an end to all those extras.

You frowned at the sound and padded over to your front door, happy you had already thrown on one of your law school hoodies to keep yourself warm until the festivities properly started. The sight of a familiar man through the peephole, hands resting comfortably in his slacks, threw you off.

Automatically, your hands were disengaging all the locks, were swinging the door open. “You’re early—”

Whatever words you had next immediately dissipated on your tongue. Taehyung was there, but he apparently came with company. Your mind whirred, trying to come up with a perfectly logical reason for why all three Kim brothers were at your doorstep right now.  

“Your hair,” you blurted, your scrambled brain latching onto the easiest subject first.

“Hmm?” Taehyung ruffled his newly dyed locks, the onyx hue a stark difference from the silver you were used to. “Oh yeah, I guess I haven’t seen you all week. My dad wanted me to dye it to a more ‘appropriate’ color before the conference. But whatever—it was time for a change, anyway. And this will be much easier to upkeep.”

You could only continue to stare at him as he spoke, your eyes naturally drifting over his shoulder at your additional visitors. 

All three of them were dressed pretty casually, which was normal for Taehyung and Namjoon, but less so for Seokjin when not in the comfort of his own home. The soft pink of his sweatsuit was a stark contrast to the sharp intelligence of his eyes, and he met your gaze for only a few seconds before he was turning to meet Namjoon’s instead, a pinch in his brow. 

Taehyung spoke again before either of them could say anything. “You gonna keep us out here?” he teased, casually leaning against the doorframe.

That finally jumpstarted you out of your haze, scrambling to move out of the way and gesture them inside. “Yes, of course. Come in!” Before your nosy neighbor caught them and assumed you were slutting it up.

(She would technically be right, but still. It was the principle. Your life was none of that judgy old shrew’s business.) 

Tae strolled in like he always did—like he owned the place—but you noticed his brothers’ strides seemed a bit more hesitant than the confidence you were usually witness to. Namjoon’s mouth was slightly pursed in the way you’d long learned meant he was thinking. Why did they seem as confused as you did?

“Hi,” you hedged anyway, a small, puzzled smile on your lips. “It’s been a while. Sorry if I’m acting weird—I just wasn’t expecting you, so I’m a little thrown off.”

Understanding immediately crossed Seokjin’s features, but you only got a second to see it before he was whipping towards his youngest brother, appalled. 

Namjoon was looking at him too, clearly irritated. “Are you serious, Taehyung?”

“What?” you asked, gaze flitting between the three of them in hope of finding some sort of clarity. 

“You never asked her?” Seokjin snapped.

“You know that’s not cool, man,” Namjoon sighed, an agitated hand running though blond locks.  

Why were they standing in your hallway and having whole conversations in front of you like you weren’t even there? “Never asked me what?” you cut in bemusedly, a little louder than you intended. It worked, at least, all three men immediately turning back to you.

Taehyung, for his part, looked properly contrite, cringing a little at the exasperation in your voice. “I’m sorry,” he told the room before placing his attention solidly back on you. His eyes were soft and sincere. “It truly slipped my mind, and I’m sorry, _____. I didn’t think.”

“When do you ever?” Seokjin snarked, but you ignored him, focused solely on Taehyung.

“What, Tae?” you encouraged gently. “What are you sorry for?”

It was clear from the hunch of his shoulders that he felt bad. “Um…”

“He invited us to come with him to meet you today,” Namjoon supplied. He gave his little brother a disappointed shake of his head. “But that’s not a decision for him to make. Is it, Tae.”

“I just knew that none of us have seen her in a while,” Tae whined. “And _____, when you reached out yesterday, I figured it would be the perfect opportunity since we’re about to leave the country for a few weeks.”

“I should have known better,” Seokjin muttered below his breath, looking heavenward in his annoyance. “I’m really sorry about this, _____. You never marked group activities as a no and I assumed Taehyung actually asked you like an adult, so I thought you were on board. I can leave.”

You blinked, still trying to grasp what was going on. “You were…trying to share your time?” you asked Taehyung slowly.

He nodded meekly. “I don’t mind sharing,” came his honest answer.

“But does she,” Seokjin scoffed, rubbing his temples in irritation. “That’s the only thing that matters. And to think otherwise is just selfish, Taehyung.”

“No, no, it’s okay.” The words left your lips before your brain could even register them, likely spurred on by how the increasingly chastened expression on Taehyung’s face. The three of them looked at you in surprise.

“It’s okay?” Namjoon parroted, an eyebrow raised in question.

You swallowed, mind racing to actually consider the consequences of what your mouth had just offered. But your nod of confirmation came almost immediately, because you knew Taehyung had never been trying to trap you. One of the qualities that simply made him him was his spontaneity, and while that made him fun and interesting to be around, it also was a double-edged sword that could easily make you end up in situations like this.

Tae knew none of them had seen you in a while, he knew they were soon going to jet out of the country, and had simply been trying to be nice in inviting his brothers along. He didn’t mean any harm.

“It’s okay,” you repeated, giving him a reassuring smile that visibly loosened some of the tension in his body. “You can all stay.”

The words settled between the four of you, heavy in the resulting quiet. Teeming with implication. You still weren’t completely sure what you were agreeing to, but what you did know was that you were going to need something to help stave off the nerves slowly bubbling beneath your skin. You cleared your throat, turning to make your way to the kitchen. “I think I need a drink.”

You didn’t glance back at them, but you could still feel them trailing you. Feel the heat of their gaze, and even the distinct heat of a body against your back, only a whisper away. Instead, you busied yourself with rooting around in your pantry and pulling out a handle of tequila. 

“This for me?” hummed a familiar velvety voice, close enough for you to easily deduce who had invited himself into your space so intimately. Taehyung. 

You looked over your shoulder at him, immediately frozen with what you saw. His eyes were blatantly trailing your figure, undeterred by the obstacle of your sweatshirt and easily roving your stockinged legs and feet. A dangerous smirk crawled across his face that had a delighted shiver racing down your spine in anticipation. “What?” came your stupefied reply. 

“This.” His gaze lingered on your toes, but quickly rose so he could playfully flick the zipper of your sweatshirt. “Whatever you’ve got on under there. Is it for me?”

Heat licked between your thighs at his deceptively light tone. At the way he was looking at you. “No,” you sniffed. Not wanting to give in just yet. “Just something I wear around the house.”

“Well, it’s nice,” came another voice, and you were instantly reminded of your other guests. Namjoon was leaning against an adjacent counter, eyes dark. “You never wear stuff like this for me—Taehyung must be your favorite.”

Startled despite his teasing tone, your hands flew up in protest. “N-No, it’s not that—”

“Of course I’m the favorite,” Tae sassed, throwing you a wink. “It’s okay to admit it, _____. We all know!” 

There was an almost immediate snort from behind you. Technically quiet enough to go unnoticed, but full of just enough derision that Taehyung’s proverbial hackles raised at the very sound of it. His head whipped to the source.

Jin looked deceptively bored, meeting his youngest brother’s glower with a flat stare. A single lifted eyebrow said everything his mouth deigned not worth the effort. What?

Tae scowled at his brother’s obvious disdain, but then, after a few moments, he simply shot an exhale from his nose and shook his head. “You’re clearly goading me,” he chuckled. “But you know what? It’s not gonna work this time. If you’re gonna be a jackass, you can just go.”

“I think you’re vastly overestimating your importance in this situation,” Seokjin scoffed, rolling his eyes. “But what else is new.”

“Guys,” Namjoon sighed, holding up pacifying hands in an attempt to ward off the rising tension.

You observed the whole exchange silently, still too off-kilter from the situation you’d suddenly found yourself in to do much more than look from brother to brother as if you were watching a tennis match. 

This was only the second time the four of you had all been in the same room—with the first being your original meeting discussing the contract. Well, technically third, if you counted that party Taehyung took you to so many months ago—the one that rerouted your life onto this much more interesting path. But the three of them hadn’t really mingled then, so you had been left to speculate their group dynamic. 

Now, though, you were starting to suspect your inklings were true.

Seokjin, the oldest, with lots of responsibility and expectations always set on him. Taehyung, the spoiled youngest who grew up without any of the same restraints, but also without any of the same parental attention. And Namjoon, the calm, stereotypical middle child, the glue who held it all together. The forced peacemaker who made sure that any of his brothers’ unspoken resentment for each other never got too far out of line.

“The only person who can tell me to leave is _____,” Seokjin continued, the sound of your name immediately throwing you out of your thoughts. You straightened, unprepared to suddenly find yourself locking eyes with him and surprised at the intensity you found there. “And is that what you want, _____? Do you want me to leave?”

“No, of course not,” you blurted. You didn’t miss the smug look Jin threw his brother, nor the way Tae’s lips pursed in irritation, but you couldn’t really find it in you to care about any of that right now. With a steadying breath, you focused instead on shuffling over to another cabinet and pulling out a glass.

It was starting to hit you. You weren’t sure what in the hell was going on, what exactly it was you agreed to, but whatever it was, you now had all three of your lovers in your apartment at the same time. Respectful of you and your space, but still obviously ogling you—ravenous predators slowly and eagerly circling their next meal.

It all made your skin prickle in anticipation, the thrill of the unknown buzzing in your veins.    

“Choo choo,” you muttered to yourself sarcastically, pouring a healthy amount of tequila into your cup.

Namjoon raised a brow. “What?”

“What?” you parroted immediately, startled that he had heard you.

“I just…nevermind, I thought you said something.”

“Oh. Uh, I was just wondering if any of you wanted any.”

“No, I’m okay. Thank you.”

“I’ll take some,” Tae piped up brightly, moving into your space before you could blink. Body a breath away as he reached over to you to pull his own cup from the cabinet. You froze at his proximity, unable to look away as he smirked down at you. “Choo choo,” he murmured with a wink.

Before you could react with anything more than a sharp gasp, he was pulling away again, reaching for the tequila bottle.

Jesus.

With a slightly unsteady hand, heart pumping furiously in your chest, you welcomed the burning liquid down your throat, sticking your cup out for Tae to pour you more once it was empty.

“So how have you all been?” you babbled, tone a little too high and strained to be casual. “It’s been so long, I was beginning to think you’d forgotten about me. Or that you’d made other arrangements or something. I don’t think I’ve ever been paid to be stood up before, that’s kind of embarrassing—” A hand, warm and gentle, rested on your arm, and immediately, all coherent thought escaped your electrified body.   

It was Seokjin, slowly rubbing what he likely thought were calming assurances, but only amping you up more. “She rambles when she’s nervous,” he informed his brothers, the small smile on his lips betraying his endearment.  

“Aw, don’t be nervous, babe. I’ll take good care of you,” Taehyung cooed, effortlessly draining his glass and motioning towards yours. “Want another one?”

No, that probably wouldn’t be a good idea. The last thing you needed was something that could lower your gag reflex even more. Vomming all over them would certainly make for an interesting going away gift, but then they would most certainly ghost you for real.

You shook your head of the negative thoughts, timidly swiping a tongue over your suddenly very dry lips. “So how exactly is this going to work?”  

“The way it’s always worked,” Tae reassured you with a nonchalant shrug. “It’s just you and me. The only difference is that they’re here too—but you don’t have to worry about that. I told them they could only watch.”

It took you a few moments to process that, your eyes silently roving over each of them and finding them all watching you right back. Ready, but waiting. 

Look, don’t touch. Another interesting twist to a night that was already looking to be interesting.

“Is that okay?” Seokjin asked, clearly intending to follow your lead. Leaving the ball in your court. And another glance at the other two showed they obviously shared their older brother’s sentiments. 

A memory flickered teasingly in the corner of your mind—the trepidation of being fucked in front of a window where anyone could see. The undeniable thrill that followed the thought of being watched. 

You swallowed. “Yeah,” you finally replied. “If…you want to.”

“Do you want us to?” Namjoon pressed sternly, refusing to let go of your gaze. Communication, he always insisted. Solid consent, or no consent at all. Yes or no.

All three stared at you. You shifted under their attention, a bit out of your element, but ultimately sure. “Yes,” you breathed.

“Okay,” Namjoon simply replied with an approving nod. With a pleased smile that brought forth dimpled cheeks. But then he shifted towards you more, and the slight change in his stance seemed to completely change his demeanor. His intention. “What’s your safeword?”

You knew he knew it; knew he knew you did as well. The two of you had been together enough times for a rhythm to between you to form, so this repeating of superfluous information was likely solely for his brothers’ benefits.

“Cinnamon.”

“And if you can’t say it?”

“Tap you 3 times.”

“Good.” 

“Safeword?” Taehyung chuckled incredulously, eyes a little wide in surprise. “Well shit.”

“Yeah, and I know how to use it too, if you get out of line,” you teased, but your mind was already elsewhere. It didn’t matter that Tae was the one who would be actively playing with you today—you had spent enough time with Namjoon that you had apparently been conditioned. The blond had asked you your safeword, you repeated it to him, and so the scene had officially started. All of your previous unease ebbed away as you couldn’t help but focus instead on what you were all here for. 

Carefully, you set your glass down on the counter and moved to exit the kitchen, brushing against Taehyung on your way out and shooting a pointed look at him over your shoulder. “You ready?”

“Baby, you know I’m always ready,” he purred, jolted into action and eagerly trailing down the hallway after you. “I’ve just been waiting on you.”

You didn’t bother to turn to see if the others were following you. You knew they were, their very presence somehow making the hallway feel like it was shrinking, overstuffed. Still, you tried not to let that unnerve you, continuing on with purpose until you made it to your destination and were hovering awkwardly next to your bed. 

They all filed into the room, one by one, and you bit your lip, fully out of your element. Three handsome men had allowed you to lure them here, but now that they were? You had no idea what your next move was supposed to be.  

Luckily for you, Tae was more than happy to take initiative, immediately slinking up to your side and waggling his eyebrows suggestively. The gesture was so ridiculous that you couldn’t help but snort, and he simply grinned, pleased with himself for lessening your nerves, even if only a little. He reached for you without a second thought and you let him, eager to fall into more familiar territory. 

Taehyung’s large hands smoothed over your hips, your ass with clear familiarity. A finger curled under the top of your thigh highs, lightly snapping the elastic against your skin. “You really did this is for me, huh?”

The dark look in his eye had the breath catching in your throat. “Shut up,” you scoffed unconvincingly.

He tsked, the wicked curl of his lips ruining any illusion of disappointment. “You know I like it when you’re mean to me.” 

You could only blink in response. You hadn’t known that. Was he serious? Was this another level to his subjugation, or was he just pulling your leg? 

Before your brain had the opportunity to come up with a proper retort, Tae was reaching out a finger to tap the zipper of your sweatshirt, gaze focused on its slow, teasing sway. “So.”

Your brow lifted, an unspoken prompting. 

The swinging zipper almost slowed to a stop, and when he reached out this time, it was to lightly run his thumb over the metal, to slowly roll it between his fingers. You swallowed, the anticipation of what you knew to be coming only adding to the charged silence between you. Distractedly, the tip of his tongue swiped across his lips, drawing your gaze. “You invited me to play,” he finally continued, voice honeyed amber. Crushed velvet. 

As if he hadn’t been playing with you from the moment he entered your apartment. You tilted your head anyway—an invitation and a challenge. “Then let’s play.” 

A small smile touched his lips, clearly pleased that his teasing invoked yours. But he didn’t say anything else, his response simply to finally guide the zipper down its track. Leisurely, unwrapping you like a present and delighting in the underneath.  

And you had technically dressed yourself to be one, so you let him. Let him take his time so he could fully appreciate the swell of your breasts, the purposeful, flirty peek of your nipples through the scarlet lace. You wished you had had the time to properly do your hair and makeup and slip on the heels you had set aside just for the occasion so he could get your full intended effect, but your less than perfect appearance didn’t seem to dissuade Taehyung at all. No, he simply slid his hands under the fabric when he finally got impatient enough—fingers light and palms warm—and pushed the sweatshirt off your shoulders with eyes that were all pupil. His hungry gaze carefully roved your form, a lingering path from head to toe that made your skin tingle in its wake.  

His lips parted, tongue giving them another distracted swipe, and then he finally moved again, making his way to your dresser. Now that his broad form wasn’t blocking your view of the rest of the room, you were quickly reminded of the room’s other occupants. Seokjin and Namjoon still hovered near the doorway, quiet, but obviously also drinking in the sight of you now that they could see you properly. Your breath caught, not used to having so much obvious desire directed at you, the air so thick with it you could practically taste it, heady and syrupy.

A light scraping sound regained your attention, and when you turned your head, you realized Taehyung had pulled open a particular drawer—one that he had quickly became familiar with since the start of your arrangement. He pulled out the lube he was looking for, but was much more interested in something else in there, if the mischievous look on his face was any indicator. “What’s this?” he asked, mouth a delighted box, and before you could chastise him about going through your things without permission, he was already pulling out your wand vibrator. “You got a new toy?”

“It’s not new,” you huffed, slightly embarrassed despite everything. “I just usually keep it in the shower.”

You saw his Adam’s apple dip at that information. Saw the wheels turning behind his eyes before he was quickly shutting the drawer and headed towards the bed with his loot in hand. He sat on the edge and eagerly motioned for you to follow.

Your eyes narrowed suspiciously at the vibrator he had neglected to put away, but Taehyung just reached for your hand and gently pulled you towards him until you were close enough for him to properly guide onto his lap. “Don’t be like that,” he murmured against your neck, his hot breath against the skin inciting a shiver to run through you. “Gotta prep you for the show.”

Ah yes, the show. He had faced you away from him, so now it was impossible for you to forget your captive audience. At some point, Seokjin had pulled your office chair away from your desk, and now he was lounging across the room, in direct view of the bed. His legs were comfortably spread, almost as if it was an open invitation for you to crawl onto his lap instead. Namjoon, on the other hand, was casually leaning against the desk, arms crossed. Eyes dark.

Lips trailed up your neck, quickly regaining your attention. Taehyung pressed slow kisses into the sensitive skin, humming contentedly when you tilted your head to give him better access. His hands dragged up and down your stockinged legs, his exploration only pausing to playfully snap the garter at your thigh. Your breath caught in your throat, heat thrumming through your veins at the action. You felt him smirk, and then he was tactfully lifting your legs by the knees and hooking them around his own one by one. Easily spreading  your thighs by widening his own.

Easily revealing to your unsuspecting employers that your lingerie was crotchless.

The sudden display of your pussy had an immediate effect on the room, though no one said a word. The air was so charged with crackling energy that you shivered, almost breaking out in goosebumps at the onslaught of blatant desire. This close, it was quite easy for you to hear how Tae’s breath hitched, quite easy to interpret the excitement of his fingers, still compulsively tracing over the pattern of your stockings like he wasn’t even aware he was doing it. Inexplicably, you still found yourself feeling a bit shy at the salacious attention you intentionally brought upon yourself, gaze darting to the floor for a few seconds before you finally chanced a look at the other two from beneath your lashes. Seokjin was busy unabashedly staring at your spread pussy, Adam’s apple bobbing, but Namjoon was unabashedly staring at you, your heart pounding when you locked eyes.

The spell was only broken when an impatient hand guided your head to the side, Taehyung demanding your full attention. After lapping against your pulse one last time, his mouth promptly switched course to your own,  the kiss sweet, but decidedly sloppy due to the angle. In any case, it was easy to quickly lose yourself in the warmth of his lips—at this point, it was all practically reflex—and you were so engrossed in the ebb of his tongue that you completely missed the rather foreboding buzzing in the room until something was being purposefully pressed against the most sensitive part of you.

“Shit,” you gasped, jerking in his hold. But it didn’t matter, because Tae’s other hand was gripping tight at your thigh, ensuring you could do nothing but squirm in his lap, breath quickening in anticipation. 

“Hm?” came his casual response. You knew from experience that he only had your vibrator on the first or second level, but the way his restless fingers still plucked at your stockings told you he was nowhere near done with you. Let’s play you had teased, and he clearly intended to do just that. 

Before your thoughts could linger too long on how intense this night was likely going to be, the vibrator was shifted slightly to the side, resting momentarily on your thigh so Taehyung could reach for the bottle of lube and give it a generous squeeze. 

“What’s your plan?” you breathed, the question inane even to your own ears. But the words escaped you before you could even properly process them, needing to say something in an effort to distract yourself from the muted vibrations that were still trickling up your leg to your core. 

Tae let out an amused exhale, clearly not fooled by your feigned nonchalance. He humored you anyway, despite your very obvious failings to suppress a shiver. “Gotta prep you,” he answered huskily, busy warming the lube with his fingers and making them visibly slick in the process.

You only had one moment—two—before you felt him sliding a finger across the seam of you. Slowly dragging the digit up from your entrance to your clit, ghosting over the bundle of nerves just enough to make your breath catch, then drifting his way back down again.

“Don’t tease,” you murmured. 

That earned you a chuckle in response. “Don’t you think you’re the one being the tease here? Texting out of the blue and wearing this—”another snap of your garter against your thigh, to punctuate his point—“when you knew damn well it would drive me crazy?”

“I don’t know. Sounds like I was being pretty direct to me.”

Another chuckle. “Fair.” And without further preamble, he slipped a finger in you, your relief leaving you in a shuddery exhale. “That better?”

“M-Much.”

“How about this?”

Another finger, plunging into your willing heat and making another relieved sigh escape you at the stretch. “We’re getting there.”

You didn’t have to be able to see him to know he was grinning, always one to be entertained by the easy banter between you. Tae didn't say anything, his response better communicated by a scrape of his teeth across the sensitive skin of your neck, settling to suck on your pulse point. 

You didn’t bother hiding your shiver this time, unconsciously slumping further against him, hips reflexively jerking forward to pull him in deeper.

Taehyung added a third finger, snapping and scissoring and pressing and curling. Seducing your body’s natural resistance until you really started to betray your need, hips canting greedily towards his thrusts, whines erupting from your throat.

“You’re enjoying this already, baby?” Tae cooed, delighted by how responsive you were being. “I’ve barely done anything.”

You just nodded distractedly, the familiar warmth that was building in your core and creeping down your legs making it hard to think about anything else. Still, you couldn’t help your gaze being drawn to the other occupants of the room, who seemed to be frozen in time, dutifully having not moved from their posts. Completely enraptured by the way their brother meticulously worked you open.

Tae breathed hot into the shell of your ear. “You like it when they watch you?” came his knowing whisper, a nip against the cartilage punctuating his point. “Like for them to see how good I make you feel? Hmmm? What if we show them how good you take this dick?”

Your pussy fluttered. Tae cussed under his breath, teased with the wet, pulsing grip of you and falling deeper into his own fantasy. “Fuckkk, you’re dripping all over my hand, baby. I would probably just slide right in, wouldn’t I?”

“Yesss,” you moaned. “I can take it, baby.”

“I know you can. With this fucking perfect pussy. But what if we played some more? Got you nice and juicy for me?”

“I’m always juicy,” you sassed back, but any more retorts died on your tongue when you saw him reach again for the momentarily forgotten vibrator. 

Tae’s arms circled around you, his chin slotting into the crook of your neck so he could get a better look of what he intended to do. The vibrator was turned up from its low rumble and pressed unceremoniously against you, and you yelped, jolting in his hold. It was too much, and you couldn’t help but writhe against him. Still, you welcomed the sudden intensity, desperate whines freely escaping you as you hurtled toward your peak. Tae only fingered you faster in response, the undoubtedly sloppy sounds drowned out by the vibrator. “I could slide right in, but I won’t cause it’s much more fun this way. Especially since we haven’t seen each other in a while. More fun for everybody if take our time, right, baby? So how about you cum on my fingers first, and then you can pick everywhere else on me you’d like to cum?”

You could only moan freely, just like how Tae liked. If you weren’t so distracted by the way he was fucking stars behind your eyelids, you would have noticed just how affected your spectators were becoming at your display. The shifting, the subtle rubbing over pants.

But as it were, you were completely preoccupied by your swift descent into madness, your hand desperately scrabbling for purchase before ultimately rooting itself in the hair at Taehyung’s nape to await your rapidly approaching release. Because at this point, your orgasm was inevitable, your thighs quivering with the sheer force of it, every atom of you hyper-focused on achieving that satisfying end goal. 

Until the sudden sound of a certain voice knocked you out of your trance. 

“Stop.”

You jolted as if touching a live wire, hand immediately wrapping around Taehyung’s wrist like a vice and yanking the vibrator away from you. 

For a few moments, the room was silent, save the rumble of the toy and your heavy breathing. But Taehyung was too baffled to let what just happened slide. “What’s the matter?”  

You nervously licked your lips, too frozen in Namjoon’s dark stare to answer his younger brother.

“You know better,” came the blond’s low admonishment, Seokjin turning to look at him in bewilderment. 

And you did know better—when you were with Namjoon, you were not allowed to cum without his express permission. It was a game the two of you played that you often lost, despite your valiant efforts. It just never occurred to you that you would still be expected to play in Namjoon’s general presence, whether he was the one touching you or not. 

Jittery with your aborted orgasm and nervous excitement, you looked away, your eyes automatically averted submissively to the floor in a last effort to assuage him. “I’m sorry, Daddy,” you replied softly.

“Daddy?” Taehyung repeated incredulously. “What the fuck?” In his confusion, his hold on you slackened, and, nervous he wouldn’t take the hint otherwise, you used the opportunity to shift his fingers out of you and stumble forward on wobbly legs.

“Take your clothes off,” was your reply, breath labored and skin already veiled in a light sheen of sweat. You needed to distract him from asking too many questions right now. Needed to distract yourself from just how strongly your body was begging to fall apart.

Tae was still confused, but he didn’t need to be told twice. Off came his button-down shirt, each button popped open just roughly enough that you were surprised none of them ended up scattered across the floor in his haste. Off came his slacks, unzipped and then easily slipped down his slim hips. He paused when reaching for his underwear though, eyes narrowing at something behind you.

You didn’t even get the chance to turn around to investigate what had caught his attention before you felt it—the distinct feeling of someone hovering in your space, close enough you could feel his body heat radiating against you.  

“Hey sweetheart,” came a familiar husky voice, goosebumps rippling across your body at the feel of Seokjin’s hot breath ghosting up your neck. “Can I touch you?”

“Hey,” Tae scowled.

“_____?” Jin interrupted, still only millimeters away. A whisper away, but never touching, waiting for the only permission he truly needed—yours. Not Taehyung’s.  

Without a second thought, you leaned back against him, delighting in the feel of his body slotting so naturally into yours. “Yes,” you breathed, pressing your ass further into what could only be the hard jut of his cock.  

Soft, plush lips trailed up your neck instantly, large hands sliding over your hips and around your waist. You immediately melted into him, your body well-trained and eager for the pleasure it knew those lips and hands would deliver. 

“This wasn’t the deal,” Tae huffed, eyebrows scrunched in irritation as he finally slid off his boxer briefs. Drawn like a magnet, your eyes fell to the bounce of his freed cock, tip already shiny with precum.

Seokjin tutted distractedly, too busy nibbling along your jaw to give his youngest brother much attention. “You need to learn to share, Taehyung. The rest of society learned that concept when we were toddlers.”

“Whatever,” Tae grumbled, clearly not happy with the way the night was turning out. He only allowed his brother a few more seconds to have his way with you before he was reaching for your hands and walking you back towards the bed.  

You gasped in surprise when the world was suddenly off-kilter, your hands reflexively scrambling to hold onto Tae for balance, but it was only when the two of you landed on the mattress that you realized he had purposely tipped you into him, your chests flush. 

“Really, Taehyung?” you laughed, now conveniently in his embrace instead of Seokjin’s. 

Tae just grinned in response, so close that his nose brushed yours. Cheekily, his hands worked the flesh of your behind.

“I’ve been wondering where those have been coming from,” you heard Seokjin say behind you, and your face heated up in realization of what he was talking about, once again shy to be so on display and open for scrutiny. You had forgotten how mottled the skin of your ass still looked, and it was a little embarrassing to be called out on it. Time apart meant the bruises were near the end of their healing stage, but though you no longer sported marks of potentially alarming colors, their faded remnants still branded you in the distinct shape of a hand. 

“If you were wondering, why didn’t you ask,” you countered, tucking your face in Tae’s neck to help hide your flustered state. 

“Because that’s rude,” Jin answered easily, his own hand reaching over to gently smooth over the discolored skin. “And it’s really none of my business.”

“I think they’re pretty,” Taehyung cut in from below you. This close, you could feel the rumble of his declaration, could feel the heat of his stare. Of his want.

“So do I.”

A different voice, one that made an undeniably eager shiver run through you. Slowly, you lifted your head and turned, and there was Namjoon, still standing across from the bed, eyes all pupil.

The way he was looking at you…desire rippled through your whole body in response, your next words leaving your lips before you could even process them. 

“Are you going to touch me too, Daddy?”

The room was quiet, the question marinating long enough that the air became thick and heavy with the resulting tension. Just when you thought you might suffocate, Namjoon finally tilted his head. Slowly—a predator locked in on prey, playing with his meal simply for his own amusement—he stalked closer to the bed. He walked past Seokjin and made it all the way to the foot of the mattress, close enough to touch you if he so pleased.

The burn of his gaze was somehow stronger now that he was closer, a palpable energy that drew you like a moth to a flame. You couldn’t help but scramble upright when he was finally right in front of you, clambering to your knees despite Tae’s clear reluctance to let you go.

“Do you want me to?” Namjoon asked passively. He looked down at you, seemingly unimpressed by how eagerly you knelt on the mattress, just waiting for him to join you on it. “You already have enough people taking care of you. Are you really that greedy?”

“Yes,” you shivered, the action involuntary but wanting. “Want you too, Daddy.”

“Hm.” The single syllable was dismissive, but your previous time spent with Namjoon had taught you not to take that at face value. That you had to have patience, that if you simply waited him out, you would always eventually get what you wanted.

As if proving your point, Namjoon silently considered you for a few more seconds before his eyebrow finally raised in challenge. “Open,” he demanded. 

Your jaw dropped instantly, tongue out, and he smiled, pleased at your obedient response.  

You weren’t sure you had the energy to be bratty to him today when his brothers were still in the mix too. 

“Good,” Namjoon cooed, all dimples and boy next door. The boy next door who firmly grasped your chin, lifting your head a little and leaning down. But though your eyelashes fluttered in preparation for the slot of his mouth against yours, it never came. Namjoon paused, slanted eyes quietly observing you, then spit in your open mouth instead.

“Jesus,” came Taehyung’s awed reply from behind you, but you were too busy trying not to whimper, thighs squeezing together with sudden want. Namjoon hadn’t told you you could swallow, so you didn’t, drool starting to collect until it overflowed and dribbled down your jaw. 

“Very good,” Namjoon murmured, and this time, he did lean down to kiss you, all wet and sloppy. You eagerly pushed further into his space, blood thrumming with your need for more, but he pulled away before you could get too carried away. He cleared his throat, lips pink and spit-slicked. “Gonna keep being a good girl for us today?”

You immediately nodded, a thrill going through you at the way the action rapidly made his expression steel over. He tsked condescendingly. “Now, now, you know better than to not speak when spoken to.”

“I’m sorry Daddy. I promise I’ll be good.”

“Well, that definitely answers the mystery bruises.” It was Seokjin, now behind you. Somehow you hadn’t noticed him discard his shirt and climb onto the bed, too caught in Namjoon’s spell. You felt his hands drifting across your waist again, roaming up to cup your breasts and lightly pinch at your nipples through the lace. You whimpered, arching eagerly into his touch.

“Oh come on,” Taehyung whined. A turn of your head produced him, naked and sulking in the middle of the bed. “It was supposed to be my turn.” 

You couldn’t help but laugh at his cute pout, dutifully extracting yourself from Jin’s hold to crawl your way towards the youngest brother. “Don’t worry, baby. I know how to multitask.”

He greedily grabbed you as soon as you were in reach, holding you tight to his chest and plopping back onto the bed so you were once again on top of him, knees straddling his hips. You giggled again at his antics, flattered by his sudden possessiveness, and Tae playfully nipped at your collarbone in retaliation. 

The bed dipped behind you, and then there was Seokjin again, undeterred by Tae’s petulant behavior. “Not only are you bad at sharing, but you’re only thinking about yourself,” he scoffed, grabbing your hips without preamble. “What about _____?”

Taehyung immediately bristled beneath you. 

“It’s okay,” you tried to reassure, but before you could properly defend him, you suddenly found yourself face down and ass up, the sudden appearance of a tongue swiping through your slit rendering you shuddery and brain dead. “Fuck. Jin—”

You felt Seokjin’s smirk against you. “Sorry, sweetheart,” he said huskily, hot breath ghosting over your most private of parts. “Couldn’t help myself. You dressed my meal up so pretty.”

That was fair, you supposed. That he made proper use of the easy access your lingerie provided, that he gave himself the opportunity to admire the tiny lacy hearts on your garter belt up close. But Seokjin didn’t allow himself to preen for very long, his focus immediately turning back to the task at hand. Laving hot and slow, your whole body tingling down to your toes.

Unconsciously, you pushed back further into his face, and Jin hummed approvingly, massaging your asscheeks, large hands spreading them apart so he could get as close to you as humanly possible. His enthusiasm has always been so fucking sexy, and you knew he wasn’t playing it up for theatrics when the slurping sounds started. You were that turned on, still frustrated from being led to the edge of the proverbial cliff and not allowed to jump, and Seokjin was more than happy to help himself to the honey he was coaxing from between your thighs. 

A haze was starting to take over you, completely focused on how good he was eating you out, on how hot you were, sweat and desire prickling your skin. Your hips mindlessly circling while you vaguely tried not to drool on Taehyung’s chest. 

Not that Tae seemed to mind much, hands idly roaming whatever stretch of skin he could touch, content to watch how your expression twisted and eyes glazed over as lust easily towed you under.

Seokjin pulled back a bit, chuckling at your whines of protest when he did so. But the familiar click of a top being popped open shut you up, lifting your head and looking over your shoulder to confirm your suspicions. The lube was a bit cold when it hit your asshole, and Jin wasn’t shy with the amount he squeezed out. His eyes were completely blown, enraptured by its slow decent, watching the lube trail through your pubic hair and down your slit. A distracted tongue swept across his lips, completely focused on sliding his fingers through the slick and making everything somehow even more wet. 

You shivered at his touch, thighs twitching as his long fingers smoothed the lube over your bundle of nerves in sure, purposeful circles. He leaned in again, tongue blazing a hot, meandering trail up the inside of your thigh and giving the sensitive skin there a playful nip before his fervent licks returned. Tongue slipping down to caress your clit, wandering back up to dip into your throbbing cunt, and dragging back down again. 

It was on one of these passes that Seokjin accidentally drifted a bit too high, your undulating hips causing him to lap over your asshole instead. You moaned, loud, and he immediately froze. 

It was clear neither of you had been expecting that reaction. But while you could only describe the look on his face as light surprise, you couldn’t help but duck your head in embarrassment.

“What’s the matter?” Taehyung breathed into your hair, wondering what halted the activities.

You weren’t really sure what to say, now embarrassed by your embarrassment. But it turned out you didn’t have to say anything, Seokjin curiously testing the waters by leaning in and placing a chaste kiss against your rim. When you didn’t do anything but suck in a breath, his tongue dipped out again for a tentative lick. You shuddered, ass reflexively bucking towards him instead of pulling away, and that was all the confirmation he needed. His hands palmed your asscheeks again, spreading them open to give himself more room to press his tongue against you more confidently, and you trembled in response.

It was a foreign sensation, but not bad. You technically hadn’t marked this as a no when signing your contract, but it never even crossed your mind that getting your booty ate would be a very real possibility. You weren’t against assplay per se—you simply had never experienced it before. And never in a million years would you have expected it to feel like this. 

“Mmmm, that’s good,” you couldn’t help but whimper. Electricity licked up your spine when his sloppy tongue slowly circled around the tight ring of muscle. Unbidden, your hand reached back, gliding through his hair before rooting itself and pulling in an attempt to get him impossibly closer to you. 

Seokjin hummed approvingly at the your enthusiasm, the sound almost sounding like he was blowing bubbles with the way you were now shoving his face between your asscheeks. Leaning somehow further into it, he ate you out with a vigor that told you he was clearly pleased you were using him to get yourself off. You melted into his ministrations, a whine falling from your lips when he gently slipped his sinful tongue inside you, the foreign feeling making your toes curl in unexpected pleasure. 

You were getting worked up. With nothing more than his mouth, Seokjin was easily restoking the blazing fire within you that only minutes before had been forced to embers. You were getting worked up, and the more you moaned and gyrated against him, the more Taehyung’s fingers twitched restlessly against your skin. If you had been in your right mind, you would have noticed his rising agitation and wouldn’t have been surprised when he suddenly grabbed you by the backs of your thighs and pulled you away from his brother. Instead, you blinked at him dazedly, pelvises flush after momentum had you inadvertently scooting further up his body.  

“I’ve shared enough,” he growled, irritated. “It’s my turn now.” Another pull, and you were back on his lap, his leaking erection grinding pointedly against your slick folds. “C’mere, baby—fucking sit it on it.” 

You were dazed, already pretty fucked out even though things were just getting started. The constant influx of pleasure was striking all your coherent thought, unable to understand anything other than finally being able to cross the finish line. And you knew from experience that Taehyung’s massive dick was a great way to get there, so you didn’t mind at all when he continued to maneuver you as he pleased, large hands canting your hips at a proper angle to receive him. 

Your breath hitched when he finally sunk into your fervid body. You were so turned on and wet at that point that it didn’t hurt the slightest, but he was so big that the very pressure of him forcing your walls apart caused your eyes to roll back in your head, your nails pressing crescent moons into the caramel of his skin. “Ungh—”    

“Shit,” Tae groaned, fingers tightening on your thighs at the wet grip of you. “Feel so fucking good, baby. Always so fucking good.”

He was buried balls deep, too on edge to give you any more than a few seconds to adjust before he was bucking wildly into you, easily scraping against your spongy nerves with every unforgiving stroke. You couldn’t do much more than take it, unfiltered moans readily escaping you. Hot and low, like they were generated deep in your pussy and Taehyung was hard at work fucking them up and out of your mouth.

You were so worked up at this point that you knew you weren’t going to last much longer, your walls tightening more and more by the second, your whole body trembling in preparation of the inevitable.

 “_____,” Namjoon snapped.

It took some effort to lift your head from where you had buried it in Tae’s neck, startled into blearily looking up to meet the middle brother’s steely gaze. Your mind raced, flustered and trying to understand how you had somehow forgotten about him. When his lips curled with a whisper of a smirk, it instantly dawned on you that him fading into the background had been entirely by design.

Namjoon had allowed you to be distracted by his brothers. Had allowed them to have all the fun while he quietly watched your slow, uncontrollable descent into carnality. Because he knew that all he had to do was wait, and you would inevitably disobey him.

And then his fun would start.

You had played your part in his little game, cockily swaggered your way right into his trap with thigh highs and a smile. Too naive to notice that the situation had been rigged from the start, and now that everything was in motion, it was far to late to save yourself from your oncoming reckoning. 

You were gasping, the pistoning of Taehyung’s cock setting all of your nerves alight and making it hard not to meet him thrust for thrust, trapped in meeting Namjoon’s stare through your wet lashes. He had moved to stand at the foot of the bed, close enough to touch, and he was the only person in the room who was still, bafflingly, fully-dressed.

“Please,” you babbled, too far gone to even know who your begging was directed towards. “Please, I—” Your body spazzed violently, only contained by Tae’s bruising grip as he relentlessly continued to plow into you. “Ohhh godddd! Fuckkk—ah, ahhhh—”

Against your best efforts, your cunt locked down, hard. So hard you forgot to breathe, pleasure and relief finally flooding your veins as you stuffed your face into Tae’s neck to ride it out, bucking and whining and incoherent.

Taehyung made a loud, choked noise, the feeling of you pulsing around him throwing him further into his trance. “Fuck yeah,” he growled, fingers digging into your thighs punishingly. Drilling into you harder, your release heightening his desperation for his own. Biology making him single-minded, manic, even when you started to mewl in oversensitivity. “Squeezing me so tight. Cream me good, baby. Fuck.” 

You continued to tremble, nothing more at this point than sparking nerve endings. Tae lifted his head a little to lick into your awaiting mouth, kissing you wet and wild and desperate while still plunging deep inside you.  

But even though did nothing to attempt to control the torrent of whines freely spilling from your tongue, in the back of your mind, you still had the good sense to be nervous. Because even without seeing his face, you already knew Namjoon was pissed. 

You had failed.

As if confirming your thoughts, fingers wrapped around your hair and pulled, naturally ripping your lips from Taehyung’s and forcing your head to lift. With nowhere to hide, you were forced to meet the full intensity of Namjoon’s glare. 

“What did I say,” he demanded darkly, a muscle jumping in his jaw. Your blood pounded excitedly.

“Cut her some slack, Namjoon,” came Jin’s mild reply from behind you. Your eyes widened, not expecting his dismissive tone to go over very well. 

Namjoon didn’t acknowledge his older brother, instead focusing his attention on his younger. A carefully controlled tempest that was moments away from unleashing its wrath. “Taehyung. Move.”

The swivel of Tae’s hips slowed, but didn’t stop. He was too on edge, too close to joining you in bliss. “I—g-give me a minute, hyung—”

“Move.” 

You could feel just how reluctant Tae was to comply—his rutting finally stopped, but his hips still instinctually twitching in a primal need to keep fucking you. Still, something in his brother’s tone made his protest cut off in his throat, and after a few labored, frustrated breaths, he obediently slipped out of you. 

You whimpered at the loss, your toes curling at the resulting friction. Between the cum that had long been leaking from you and dribbling down your thighs and the mess Tae’s cock was making in his excitement, it was hot and sticky where your bodies slotted together, and you couldn’t help the way you senselessly started to grind against him, lashes fluttering at the feeling.  

Namjoon scoffed at your clear desperation. “You would have liked that, wouldn’t you?” he snapped, grip still firm in your hair. “For him to cum inside you.”

You shivered at the thought, a little embarrassed that you were so obvious. “Yes, Daddy,” you murmured, releasing a shuttering breath when you felt Tae’s slick cock jump against your stomach at your admission.

“Well you’ve been bad,” Namjoon replied slowly, as you weren’t very bright, “so you don’t get to have what you want.” He took a step forward, legs knocking into the edge of the bed, now only a breath away, and you licked your lips, mentally preparing for what you knew would come.

But before he could get any closer to you—before Taehyung could even slide from beneath you—there were once again hands on your hips.

“Hey!” Tae snapped irritably, but whatever he had to say was drowned out by your surprised, rather pathetic choking when, with a delicious roll of his hips, Seokjin unexpectedly sank inside your pliant body, thoroughly making himself at home exactly where Tae had been forced to vacate. You had been so focused on Namjoon that you somehow missed the weight shifting behind you, the telltale rustling of clothing as he pushed is sweatpants down his hips enough to free his cock so he could stuff you the hilt. 

You had been saved by the eldest Kim, at least for now. But for how long would he really be able to delay your punishment?

Since he was still holding you by the hair, you could easily see the emotions flicker across Namjoon’s face at his older brother butting in, but his expression quickly settled into something mirroring cool indifference.

You knew better. Namjoon was a patient man, but you doubted he would let your disobedience slide so easily. 

Seemingly uncaring of either of his brothers’ vexation, Seokjin rode your ass, hips rolling forward in constant waves, strokes long and deep and pointed. Clearly wanting to keep you mewling for him. 

And as you did just that, you rapidly realized that saving you from Namjoon’s wrath had never been his intention. No, he simply liked you just like this, whiny and shivery and too fucked out to care that you were drooling and desperate. 

“You feel it, sweetheart?” he asked, voice melodic and sweet. Leaning over to press plump lips up your spine and sucking on a rather sensitive spot at the back of your neck. 

“Yesss,” you whined. You could feel everything, could feel the ripple of your ass every time his hips slammed against it, could feel every ridge of his cock that scraped against your insides. Sparks shot through you after every stroke, your clit forced to drag across Tae’s stomach with the force. “Fuck, you’re so big and deep, fuck, fuck.”

Seokjin just hummed, playing your body like a fiddle and pleased by how it was responding to him. Breath stuttering, toes curling, fingers gripping the sheets.

But despite how good he was making you feel, you weren’t too fucked out to overlook Namjoon this time. No, this time forgetting him was impossible, the middle brother doing nothing to hide his massive presence. He towered over you, intently watching you get railed by his older brother, and the barely suppressed fury you could sense radiating off him was making your cunt throb and head spin. 

“I’m sorry, D-Daddy,” you stuttered, everything tingling at the look he fixed you with in response. “I couldn’t help it.”

“Are you?” he asked lowly, a tic in his jaw. He let the question marinate for a few moments, let you simmer beneath his intense stare. Just when you felt the overwhelming compulsion to apologize again, he finally reached for you, a single finger lifting your chin and forcing you to meet his gaze directly. With a patronizing tilt of his head, he popped open the button on his pants. “Then make it up to me.”

You were already pushing yourself to your hands and knees, desperate to please. Taehyung’s hands drifted up your sides to steady you, your body trembling from the way Seokjin still reamed into you, undeterred. You reached out for the band of Namjoon’s pants, trying to get to the important bits, but he simply tutted and smacked your hand away.

“Mouth,” he said simply, the single word full of derision.

So you leaned forward again, this time using the tip of your nose to part his fly and give you proper access to his clothed cock. He was thick and swollen already, straining against the material, and you felt him stir with interest when you mouthed at him through the fabric. Coquettish licks lapping hot against the length of him and making his hips reflexively shift forward, unconsciously chasing the stimulation. You licked and sucked until there was a noticeable wet patch, doing your best to show that your apology was sincere and give him your full attention. 

But that was hard to do when his brothers were busy giving you their full attention.

Seokjin was in a trance, fingers sinking into your thighs so he could properly hammer into you. Thrusts steady and coaxing your pussy to leak its praises, your thighs sticky with your essence. 

Taehyung, on the other hand, was getting noticeably antsy beneath you, fingers increasingly twitching against your damp skin the longer his brothers got more of your attention. You looked down, and the furrow of his brow and downturn of his lips were your last clues to his growing jealousy before he took action, hand reaching up to drag through the mess you were making before his thumb sought your clit, rolling and pinching. You bucked and squealed, the extra stimulation rocking you to your core and making your walls pulse dangerously enough that you found yourself squirming to escape him, grabbing Tae’s wrist for the second time that night in an act of self-preservation.

He was undeterred, rerouting his focus to your chest instead. With impatient hands, he yanked on the cups of your bodysuit, a concerning ripping noise immediately filling the room at the action. Before you could even say anything, he was already lifting his head to eagerly bite and suckle on your newly freed tits, tongue curling around a pebbled nipple and mumbling “I’ll buy you another one.”

Switching from one erogenous zone to another did nothing to quell your desire, but at least the stimulation wasn’t as intense. This you could safely enjoy, lashes fluttering, chest inadvertently pushing further into his face in silent encouragement.

And encourage you did, Taehyung creating enough suction with his mouth to properly burst capillaries. Contentedly littering your skin with marks you allowed, comfortable in knowing this was a region easily covered by your clothes. 

Determined not to lose focus, you leaned forward again to continue giving Namjoon your full attention, trying to strategize the best way to get at him without using your hands. But either Namjoon finally decided to take pity on you or he was getting impatient too, because it was his own hands that reached down, only bothering to disturb his waistband enough to free his already leaking cock.

You didn’t know if it was a conditioned response from your past escapades or simply the extremely sexy sight of him giving himself a few firm, confident pumps. Either way, you felt it when you started to salivate, aching to properly taste him.

Your enthusiasm must have shown on your face, because the blond man simply smirked down at you knowingly, thumb slowly running over a prominent vein and further smearing his own mess around. “Well?” he prompted, almost sounding bored. You knew he wasn’t. That he was rock hard and dribbling precum, that his eyes were hooded yet laser-focused on the way his brothers devoured you—those were clues enough. Still, you couldn’t help the fire his feigned disinterest lit low in your belly, desperate to please him.      

You started low, turning your head so you could playfully tongue first at his balls before making the long trek up the massive length of him, taking care not to accidentally involve your teeth from the way Seokjin’s thrusts were rocking you forward. Finally, you took him in your mouth, suckling on the weeping head. Humming contentedly at the salty taste and meeting his blown eyes from beneath your lashes.

Namjoon’s lips parted, but he didn’t say anything, hips twitching forward when you pressed your tongue into his slit.

You didn’t notice at first. To be fair, you were plenty preoccupied with everything else going on, with all other sensations. So you didn’t notice Taehyung’s hand drifting over your hip until he was cupping one of your asscheeks, fingers teasing further inward. 

Before you could say anything, a finger sunk itself into your cunt, right next to where Jin was still plowing into you. You groaned, eyes rolling back at the added stretch, but the oldest brother wasn’t as pleased by the intrusion.    

“Taehyung,” he said gruffly, voice deep with irritation and thinly-veiled hunger. But Tae just pumped the long digit into you a few times and then slowly backtracked, lightly trailing the slick back up the cleft of your ass.

“Relax,” came Tae’s mellow reply, and when he started circling a questioning finger around your rim, you weren’t sure if he was talking to you or Seokjin. 

Still, you shivered, breath stuttering when you realized where this was going. When the finger did nothing more than circle and lightly press against you, you released Namjoon’s cockhead from between your lips, eyes fluttering. “Yes,” you breathed hot against Namjoon’s crotch, understanding what Tae was wordlessly asking you. 

A glance down produced Taehyung, eyes all pupil, tongue lolling thoughtfully in his mouth as he watched you tremble above him, tits rippling and swaying from Seokjin’s force. Finger mindlessly continuing the massaging of your hole. He locked eyes with you, making sure he understood, and then slowly started pressing the slick digit into your asshole.

You whimpered, fighting against your instinct to clamp down on him. Relax. Relax. It didn’t hurt exactly—was just pressure where you weren’t used to having any. And Tae made sure to go at a glacial pace, made sure to keep massaging your insides, to help you acclimate to the intrusion. 

Distantly, you felt Jin’s thrusts slow to something much more languid, and you had a feeling the way your body was opening up for his youngest brother was more than a little distracting.

“Good?” Tae asked shakily, sinking into you bit by bit. 

“Yes,” you slurred, completely fucked out. Tae’s always had large hands with long, elegant fingers, and right now, when he kept going further and further in, you were becoming privy to just how long they actually were. Your eyes threatened to roll back when his last knuckle finally breached you, and when he gave you a cursory tap after a few seconds, you had to swallow a moan. 

Rather affectionately, Namjoon started caressing your face, bringing your attention back to him. Dazed, you put him back in your mouth, continuing to suck him and trying not to think about how Seokjin was revving his pace back up and Taehyung was tapping your insides in tandem. Namjoon just smiled softly down at you, and it was so sweet that you almost don’t see what happened next coming, too preoccupied with everything else that was going on. Gently, his hand drifted up—and gripped you securely by the hair, cock suddenly surging down your throat. You immediately gagged, throat repeatedly convulsing around him, and he grunted appreciatively at the feeling before pulling all the way out. Cheeks still sweetly dimpling at how wrecked you were.

And wrecked was the only way to describe you. You were gasping, jaw glistening with spit. Eyes watering and whole body twitching from all the relentless stimulation.

Namjoon only gave you a few seconds to gain your bearings before a pull of your hair had your head snapping back. Before his cock was pushing back into your panting mouth. You tried your best to relax your throat this time, taking stuttered breaths from your nose when his fucking began in earnest. Tried your best to ignore the way your jaw threatened to lock from trying to accommodate the sheer girth of him.

It was a lot. You were feeling sensations from so many areas at once—ass, tits, mouth, cunt—that your brain was absolutely swirling trying to figure out which brother’s ministrations it should be focusing on. And though the pleasure pumping through you was borderline unbearable, you couldn’t even let that overflow of emotion out, your wails stuck bubbling in your chest because you were too busy lewdly gargling on Namjoon’s cock.

You remembered, all those months ago when you’d first been considering whether you should take this job, how you'd poured yourself another glass of wine and reread the contact for the nth time thinking well, I guess I do have three holes. That’s certainly convenient. 

Now that it was happening, however—now that all three of your holes were stuffed and both your mouth and your pussy were dribbling and messy and straining with effort—now, it was nothing short of intense. Nothing hurt, but you were so completely and entirely overwhelmed by all of the feeling that you thought you might just simply burst, your nerve endings crackling free and raining over the room like fireworks.  

It’s too much. It was too much, but right when you were starting to consider giving Namjoon two taps on the wrist—a metaphorical yellow—he backed off on his own, easing some of the pressure. And suddenly your mouth was free, a string of saliva still connecting you to his glistening cock before the tension of him stepping back eventually made it snap.  

Namjoon had eased some of the pressure, but he couldn’t stop more from surging forward in its place. Your body could only take so much of their tortuous teasing before it succumbed to its baser instincts, and it seemed you had finally reached your boiling point. In a trance, you pressed your hips backwards to meet Seokjin’s next stroke, forcing him deeper inside you and making you both shudder. And that small action was all the encouragement he needed, his primal instincts screaming at him to ruin you.

Drilling into you with new purpose, Jin fucked the remaining breath out of your lungs, staccatoed bursts of ah ah ah pouring your drooling mouth. Panting like an animal in heat, moaning so wantonly that you would be embarrassed if you weren’t already so completely braindead with pleasure. 

“Holy shit,” Taehyung breathed, watching your rapid unraveling in amazement. “You’re so fucking hot. Fuck.”

Before even realizing what was happening, you finally shattered around him, your bones liquifying at the intensity and causing you to collapse on Tae, writhing and choking into his neck.

“There you go,” Jin encouraged, words wobbling as he tried to weather the force of how tightly your walls were squeezing him.

Taehyung was curling his finger within you to lengthen your orgasm, was absently rubbing your back to guide you through it. “So perfect,” he whispered, lips fondly brushing against your temple while you shook.

When it finally ended you were left twitching and sensitive, too dizzy from the sheer force of your climax to register the thunder rolling across Namjoon’s face.

His brothers did, though.

An audible squelch filled the room when, without warning, Seokjin pulled completely out of you. Confused, you looked over your shoulder at him, only to suddenly find yourself lifted and tilted, Taehyung surging upright and taking you with him. Unprepared to catch yourself, your back easily hit the mattress, now finding yourself looking up at the three brothers who hovered over you.   

“Hmmm.” Namjoon pretended to think, tone calm but eyes steely. “I could have sworn I specifically told you not to do that.”

“You did,” Jin cut in mildly, looking between the two of you curiously.

Your eyes widened, unprepared for this turn of events. You never would have pegged Jin as such an instigator, but apparently he was very interested in seeing the consequences of your continued disobedience.

Your betrayal must have shown on your face, because Seokjin’s lips pursed in amusement. “Sorry, sweetheart,” he chuckled, leaning down to press a chaste kiss against your lips. “You’ve been so good for me, but we have to be fair. And unlike Taehyung, I know how to share.”

“Am I or am I not sharing right now?” Tae griped, unamused by the dig. But you were no longer paying those two any attention, your focus now fully on Namjoon and the leisurely way he was now stripping out of his shirt.

“I’m sorry, Daddy,” you hedged, knowing before you even said the words that they would do jack shit to appease him. “It just felt too good…”

Namjoon raised an unimpressed eyebrow, throwing his t-shirt on the floor as if it offended him. “All you keep saying is sorry,” he mused. Down went his pants and underwear, kicked out of his way. His knee hit the mattress, Taehyung shifting to the side so Namjoon could finally stalk over to where you lay, fucked open and wet. Cautiously, you met his stare, the breath halting in your lungs when you recognized the retribution that was undoubtedly about to come. 

“But sorry means nothing if you don’t modify your behavior,” he tsked, eyes darkening. “So. I don’t believe you.”

That was all the warning you got before he was crowding into your space, grabbing you by the ankles and hooking them over his shoulders. Caging you in with his body, pressing close enough that his cock easily slid over the mess of your cunt, making you mewl at the sensation.

And that involuntary reaction didn’t seem to help your case with Namjoon. “More?” he scoffed, seemingly displeased, though the way he rocked his length through the seam of you told a different story. “After all that, you still want more?”

You were exhausted, thighs still quivering from your last orgasm. But you couldn’t help the way the weight of his body and the slide of his cock were causing your pussy to pulse. “Yes, Daddy,” you breathed, angling your hips down so you could deliciously meet him on his upstroke.

“And it’s all about what you want, isn’t it?” he mocked, spearing you to the hilt in one go. You choked at the intrusion, not expecting him to enter you so suddenly. At this point, you were fully prepped enough to take him, but, like his brothers, Namjoon was still a lot to take all at once.

Particularly when he had already made up his mind that the best way to punish you was with his cock.

You quickly gathered his gameplay from the immediate way he started rutting into you, not giving you any time to adjust or catch your breath. Simply railing you into the mattress, your legs over his shoulders ensuring he hit deep enough for you to feel it in your throat.

“Fuckkk,” you groaned, fingers curling in the sheets, biting down on your lip enough to taste metal. “Fuck fuck—”

“What?” he taunted, eyebrows furrowed in concentration. Making sure he scraped your g-spot on every thrust. “This is what you wanted, remember? And it’s all about what you want.”

“Yes, Daddy.” You could already feel yourself ready to clamp down again, your extremely sensitive pussy overreactive to any and all stimulation. “I want it, I want it, yesss—”

He pressed impossibly closer, bending you enough that you felt the burning strain in your legs, and that did the trick. Before you could nervously start to ponder whether you were flexible enough for what he wanted to do, you were cumming, hard, back attempting to bow with the force of it but only succeeding in making your whole body lock up and your vision blur.

Namjoon didn’t slow down during your climax, and he certainly didn’t slow down after. He fucked you like a machine, undeterred by how your pulsing walls tried to suck him in and keep him there. Undeterred by how you hopelessly whined and squirmed in overstimulation. And when you suddenly heard a familiar buzzing noise, there was nothing you could do but meet his intense gaze with wide, alarmed eyes.

“What?” he demanded, pressing your long-forgotten wand vibrator right on your clit and making you immediately jerk. The caramel of his skin was already glistening and beading with sweat, but he seemed long from tired. “You think you can cum on everbody’s dick but mine?”

It was too much, the near animalistic pace of his fucking paired with how high he had turned the vibrator making your hands shoot up, scrabbling along his biceps in a panicked response, your body now entirely on autopilot, desperately trying to save itself from its fate. 

“Please,” you heard yourself beg, choking at the intensity. Legs jerking uselessly on his shoulders, nails scratching marks down his skin.

But the word that would make him stop never passed your lips. And so he continued to ignore your unsuccessful struggling, fucking you right back to orgasm, this time somehow even stronger than the last and stealing all air from your lungs.

He felt it, of course. Felt exactly how hard you were squeezing him, the tight grip of your pussy evoking the grit of his teeth. 

“You’re gonna have to try harder than that to milk me,” he growled, moving the vibrator away from you just enough for you to suck in a breath. “Come on, take this dick since you want it so bad. Take it!” 

And you had no choice but to take it, trying your best not to black out as he forced the coil within you to snap, again and again. You were shrieking, but you couldn’t even perceive your own actions anymore, swept completely by his unforgiving undertow of pain-lined pleasure. Namjoon was fucking you stupid, scrambling your brain as easily as if it were an egg, forcing you to your most primal of reactions, your most basest of self. Thrashing beneath him, desperate tears trickling down your cheeks, spit freely trickling from your wailing mouth.

It felt neverending, this exquisite torture, and just when you were starting to get distressed about how much longer you would be able to take it, Namjoon’s thrusts started to turn sloppy.

“This is all you wanted, right?” he panted, hips stuttering. A welcome warning for what was soon to come. His focus rapidly shifted from your orgasm to his own, and the way he tossed the still buzzing vibrator to the side was nothing short of impatient.

You blinked up blearily at him, the reduction in stimulation helping you slowly return to your body after being stuck the stratosphere. 

“Wanted my nut? Agreed to fuck all of us at once just so you could get more of it, isn’t that right, babygirl?”

His intense stare told you he expected an answer, but all you could do was whine in response, hesitant to admit it. Pussy pulsing at the very visual he had conjured up. Warily, you glanced at the other two brothers, nervous at what you might find there, but one look quickly evaporated all uncertainty.

Though they had moved out of the way for Namjoon, they hadn’t moved far—still close enough for you to reach out and touch, still close enough for them to hover over you and get a close view of the action. Still close enough for you to see understanding dawn across Seokjin’s face, to see pure astonishment take over Taehyung’s.

Namjoon spotted your division in attention and was having none of it, a hand guiding your jaw until you were focusing on him again. “You like being a dirty cumslut,” he prompted mildly, your heart racing in response. Slipping a thumb between your plush lips and humming approvingly when you sucked on it, tongue twirling. “Don’t you, baby?”

“Yes, Daddy,” you moaned hoarsely, the very admission making your whole body vibrate. The continued hammering of your sensitive core making you want to reflexively squirm away, though Namjoon’s heavy body ensured you had nowhere to go.

“Yes, what?”

“Yes, I like being a dirty cumslut.”

Taehyung whimpered, and it was easy for you to deduce from the rapid movement you could see from the corner of your eye that he was jacking himself off while watching you. Well and truly done with delaying his own pleasure.

And from the rather manic way Namjoon was looking at you, he was obviously on the same wavelength. “And do you know how much cumsluts love it?” A quick swipe of his tongue over his panting lips. “They want it in them. On them.”

“Please, Daddy,” you begged, nearly sobbing at the strength your want. Your head whipping around, desperately pleading with all three of them. “Please let me have it! I’ve been so good, please—”

“Holy shit,” Tae groaned, eyes rolling back in his head. “Okay baby, I’ll give you what you want. I’ll give you it all. You want it all?”

“Yes. Yes, yes yes yes yesyesyes—”

Abruptly, Taehyung was pushing forward into your space, hovering more directly over you and treating you to the sight of how those long fingers were furiously pumping his cock. He was panting, a prominent vein in his neck visible because of his efforts, little whines escaping him as he viciously worked his slick length.

There was shifting on your other side, and your focus immediately turned to Seokjin. He looked back at you dazedly, lips parted, chest flushed at your attention.  

“Please?” you whimpered, fully aware how pathetic you must have looked but not giving a single shit. So long as you got what you wanted. You needed them to give you what you wanted.

The oldest immediately softened at your pleading, always so willing and eager to please you. “Of course,” he breathed, hand already moving over himself with long, tight strokes. He shivered, hips reflexively jumping forward at the stimulation. “W-Where?”

A shift, and Namjoon was pulling back from you, maneuvering your legs back to the bed and sitting back on his haunches. Despite this new position, he never let his cock leave the comfort of your walls, continuing to hammer into you, jaw locked in concentration, balls smacking into your ass with a lewd slapping sound. Focused only on racing to the finish line.

“Anywhere,” you shuddered. “Everywhere, just…” Your entire body was on fire and you could barely take it, the anticipation of what was about to happen making you writhe over the sheets, whimpering pathetically. Your tongue lolling out your gasping mouth, an eager target.

And then finally—finally—you were given what you asked for. Loud, uncontrolled moans spilled from Taehyung’s lips, swiftly becoming desperate before one last squeeze of his cock had him cumming, his release spraying hot all over your breasts and slowly trailing through your cleavage. 

You moaned with him, delight buzzing through your veins at being marked so intimately, and the sound seemed to trigger Namjoon, who immediately pulled out of you, expertly pumped himself a few times, and then ejaculated with a long, drawn-out grunt. After essentially edging himself for most of the night, the amount of cum he gifted you was more than generous, most of it painting your pussy in long ropes, but some of it inevitably ending up on your belly with how aggressively he was jerking himself off.      

The sight of it all, the feeling, was so unbearably hot that you almost came untouched, eyes rolling back, pussy pulsing with interest despite how exhausted you were. And your obvious pleasure was what finally set off Jin, teeth digging into his lower lip while his seed spurted white across the lower half of your face and slid down your jaw, some of it delightedly landing on your awaiting tongue. 

You hummed contentedly, immediately licking the thick, heady remnants from your lips so you wouldn’t waste a drop. Your eyes fluttered shut, your hands slowly and sensually trailing over your own body. Basking in it all. Purposely smearing their mess over wider stretches of skin—pinching gently at your nipples, dragging your fingers between your tits, gliding over your hips, drawing light, sticky figure eights around your clit before dipping a bit lower and slipping two cum-coated digits inside your hot walls. Your hips twitched, lazily chasing the intrusion on reflex. Simply enjoying being so completely and utterly satisfied.   

You were so transfixed and in your own world that you completely forgot about the three other people still in the room, greedily feasting on the undeniably filthy way you savored what they gave you. You weren’t sure how long they let you be, but it was a voice finally breaking the silence that slowly lured back to reality.          

“_____?” 

The voice was gentle, yet deep, the spell cast over you immediately broken at the sound of it. It was Namjoon, hovering over you again, lips quirking into a small smile as he watched the fog disperse from your eyes. “How do you feel?”

You let out a satisfied sigh, pulling your fingers out of your pussy with hum. “Tired,” you admitted, voice raspy from the activities. “But amazing.”

His smile widened, cheeks dimpling. “I’m glad.”

Suddenly, Taehyung was laying on the bed with you, arms wrapped around your sticky form. Just like always, his sweaty body slotted easily against yours, happily nuzzling his face into your neck and apparently wholly unfazed about the fact that you were completely covered in spunk. “You’re amazing,” he chirped, pressing a flurry of kisses into your skin and making you giggle. “You know, when you told me you liked cum forever ago, I didn’t realize this was what you meant.” 

“You never asked,” you shrugged, somehow still timid despite everything that had just happened. “What did you want me to say, exactly? Hey Tae, do you mind doing me a solid and shooting the club up? Or maybe can you give me a nice, relaxing facial?”

The pure bafflement of his expression had you laughing again. “In what world would I ever say no to that?” he demanded incredulously. 

Amused by the turn in conversation, Seokjin bent down to press his lips against your forehead in gratitude before swinging his legs over the side of the bed. “Do you mind if I use your shower?”

“Of course,” you replied, moving to direct him to your bathroom before Namjoon stopped you with a pat on the thigh.

“I’ll show him.”

You couldn’t help but watch their strong, naked forms leave the room, eyes drawn to the musculature of their backs and buttocks.

“Hey.” Tae poked you in the cheek, mirth dancing in his eyes from catching your ogling. “Focus. I’m talking to you.”

“What, I’m not allowed to enjoy the view?” 

He couldn’t help but huff out a laugh, though he was undeterred from getting the answers he sought.

“I told you what I wanted,” he reminded you gently, pressing another kiss against your jaw. “You know you could have done the same.”

You shifted in his hold, sheepish. “Tae, all of this isn’t really about me…”

“What, so just because we’re paying you, you’re not supposed to enjoy it too?” he scoffed. “Baby, as we’ve just proven tonight, it’s more fun when we all have fun.”

“I always have fun!” you protested, but you were prevented from elaborating by Namjoon returning with a washcloth. He climbed back on the bed, reaching for your ankles and guiding them apart.

“Open,” he directed, his tone containing none of the dominance it often had when he usually uttered the word. You obediently followed his instruction, a soft sigh escaping your lips when he pressed the warm cloth against your thoroughly battered netherparts and started cleaning you up. 

For a little bit, Taehyung watched your makeshift bath in silence, not even saying anything when Namjoon left to rinse off the towel and came back with a freshly damp one, gliding over the stained skin of your face and chest before they started to crust over. In fact, Tae didn’t speak again until your spot bath was finished and Namjoon was clambering back in the bed with the two of you, an arm slinging low over your waist as to not disturb where Tae’s rested. Pulling you against him until your chests were flush.

“Are you sure you don’t want to come with us on our trip?” You could feel Taehyung’s pout against your skin, displeased at the idea of being away from you for two weeks.

You huffed out a laugh, slinging a leg over Namjoon’s hip to settle more comfortably into your new position as the filling of a TaeJoon sandwich. “I’m positive. I have a lot studying to do and frankly, I’m not completely sure I can walk anymore.”

“Who said you need to walk?” Namjoon cut in sleepily. 

“We can pay someone to walk for you,” came Tae’s enthusiastic, yet ridiculous offer. “We’ll be going to meetings, but you can just roam the city if you want. Or relax at the hotel. You can lounge by the pool all day and put all your food and drinks on our tab.” 

Though it certainly sounded tempting, you were fully aware what the tradeoff of that makeshift vacation would be, and the absolute last thing you wanted to think about after the crazy intense session you just experienced was sex. So, despite Taehyung’s wheedling, you managed to stand firm in your decision, completely fine with waiting until they were back in the country to even consider spreading your legs for any of them again.

And you were justified when Seokjin finally reappeared, fully clothed, rubbing a towel through his hair, and informing you that his assistant Wendy would be in touch to schedule his next session for sometime after he returned.

chapters⇢ previous | next | series masterlist

#satisfy

[ittomi]

wicked • 16

↳ Summary: In a desperate hope to stop war from breaking you are a serviced to wed the most vile man alive, the one who has committed atrocities and war crimes beyond comprehension, he who is responsible for the fall of many nations, the wicked prince who’s heart is made of stone. You are to marry a man who challenges every belief and moral you stand for, all while being faced in a foreign land with nobody but yourself too trust…But are you both truly that different? Or is hate not too far from love?

↳ Pairing: Jungkook/reader

↳ Genre: arranged marriage AU, enemies to lovers, it’s kind of a period AU??? Historical but also technically not? prince!AU, eventual smut

Word Count: 10.8k

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Note: the queen has returned everybody! good luck

Wood echoed off of wood, clapping together in a viscous motion as Jungkook’s brows pinched together, frantic to stave off the aggressive blows. He was already exhausted though, training before sunrise until sunset, only to sneak out like this. 

It could get him in a lot of trouble- both of them for that matter.

He fumbled against a blow he deflected, stepping back only for his foot to hit a dip in the ground. 

The next blow came but his reflexives weren’t sharp enough to block it, resulting in the wooden sword slamming hard into his shoulder as he yelped out.

The breath felt as though it had been knocked out of him as he gasped for air, his back planted into the ground as his name was called- or perhaps the closest he usually heard to it.

“Your Highness!” Big brown eyes peered over him in concern, “I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to hurt you.” 

Jungkook sputtered, long black hair accidentally getting in his mouth as he waved her away, “You didn’t hurt me Wheein, and stop calling me that!” He hurriedly sat upright before slumping a little.

Though Jungkook said it, it didn’t take away from the fact that it did hurt, Wheein hit hard, perhaps harder than she intended too. But Jungkook wouldn’t shy away from it, he needed to be pushed hard if he wanted to one day be a good swordsman. 

Wheein quickly backed away from him, kneeling down as she peered at him, still in mild concern, “But you’re the Crowned Prince.” 

This made Jungkook cross his arms with a huff, he knew he was the Crowned Prince, but for once he just wanted someone to treat him as a friend. He hated his title, he didn’t ask to be the next King of Penumbra, and he certainly didn’t ask to be drafted into this stupid war.

Just the thought had fear plunging into his veins like poison, he only had two weeks of training left before his official draft would begin. 

When his father told him, Jungkook knew better than to cry, though he wanted to. He kept it in, but still his father was repulsed at the sight of the boy groveling, begging his father to not send him.

‘This isn’t fair, father!’ He remembered crying out, his eyes filled with hurt and glassy, on the verge of tears he told himself he wouldn’t cry. 

And then his father’s response was even more vivid than his own.‘Life isn’t fair nor is it kind Jungkook, and you best be learning that as soon as you can.’

Just the memory made him clench his fists, and just as his father suggested, he decided to put all of his anger and frustration into training. But no matter how hard he trained, how hard he tried, how much he exhausted himself. 

It still hurt.His uncle, Jeong Dae didn’t seem to understand either, he had gone to him in some effort to lick his wounds and receive a bit of comfort, but his uncle only replied by telling him he should be honored to serve his country.

That this was his chance to prove himself to his people, to the Rosewood’s, to the world that he would be worthy of being King. 

The only problem was that Jungkook didn’t want to be King. He didn’t want to rule, he didn’t want to go to war and he certainly didn’t want to die. And no matter how much everyone tried to pet him, he could see past their empty eyes, they were sending him to his grave, he was certain of it. 

“Are you okay?” Wheein frowned, mirroring his own as she set down her sword, “You’re crying…”

Jungkook’s bottom lip quivered, both in anger and pent up sadness as he roughly shoved his tears away. How they had managed to slip out was beyond him, but he wouldn’t let it happen again. For his father, his family, and his country, he would do what was expected of him. 

His feelings didn’t matter, evidently enough. 

“It doesn’t hurt that bad.” He shook his head, ignoring her words, “You should get back to Skol before Di Jin catches you out here.”

Wheein’s frown deepened as she folded her hands together, taking one long look at him before she took a breath, “Alright, you should rest as well, I know the War Matron has been pushing all of the underling’s after dark now that there’s only a two weeks left until graduation.” 

Jungkook set his hands on his lap, “If they’d let you serve the war would be over in a day.” 

Wheein offered a small smile, “Maybe, but I’m not a boy and I’m not royalty either. Rest well Prince.” 

And with that Wheein grabbed her cloak that had been discarded, pulling it over her head to conceal her figure before she disappeared into the dark. Jungkook might have been concerned had it been anyone else, but he saw her take her wooden sword. 

He winced as he rubbed his shoulder, she could easily bludgeon someone to death if they made her angry enough, she’d be fine. 

Jungkook had sulked for only a little longer before getting up, rubbing his shoulder as he grabbed his wooden sword before sneaking his way back to the boys barracks. 

“You are an idiot, truly.” 

Jungkook hadn’t said anything for a long while, his gaze looking out over their great kingdom, the very same one his great grandfather built stone by stone, all for it to turn into this? And even despite the shitshow of a display earlier the only person missing from the parlor was his father. 

Perhaps unwilling to bother with such trifles at the late hour despite it being the Crowned Princess who had been missing. Jungkook had felt his whole stomach lurch when he had woken up, you missing from his embrace and he attempted to be rational at first, assuming you had gone on a late walk and taken Yoongi with you. 

But upon seeing Yoongi still on watch outside the doors had him immediately reeling, flashes of anxiousness and worry wrought in his entire being which came in lashes of anger to everyone around him. It didn’t matter what Jeong Dae and Areum told him in an attempt to calm him down, he wouldn’t be until you were found and safe. 

And the relief he felt when you came in, when he was finally able to hold you once more and see with his own two eyes that you were safe, it was in that moment that he knew there was no going back with how he felt. 

You had somehow entangled yourself in his entire being, somehow wiggling your way into the forefront of his mind every time you were apart and making him constantly have the desire to keep you wrapped against him. 

And yet he didn’t understand. Your words still coldly rang in his ears. Things could not be over between you both, they had hardly even begun, so surely, out of a fit of rage, much like you had in the past, said something damning in the moment.

Still, it troubled him deeply, Jungkook shook his head, “I don’t understand what I said wrong,” He frowned, deeply troubled by what had transpired, “It was the truth nobody else would tell her…”

He was honest when he said he took no pleasure in telling you the truth, but everything he said was the truth you so desperately wanted.

Your anger was justified, but why couldn’t you see from his side…? He was stretched beyond thin and Jeong Dae had only goaded him further into investigating you, he was the one who had planted a seed of doubt. 

But deep in the crevices of Jungkook’s mind laid bare his true feelings, ones he wanted viciously to deny, but still they lingered in the dark, perhaps the seed had already been there, Jeong Dae only watered it.

“You don’t…!?” Areum raised her brows, groaning as she ran a hand through her hair, “Good god you don’t understand why she was upset with you!? Jeon Jungkook! You don’t tell the women you love that you were justified in what you did!” 

“Then what would you have me do?” Jungkook snarled, his gaze finally snapping to hers. 

He already had one woman scold him tonight, he didn’t need another one to further it.

Areum puffed a breath, crossing her arms, “You could first start by swallowing your pride and admitting your’re wrong, and then you could move along to groveling for her forgiveness. But something tells me she won’t care until you genuinely mean it.” 

Jungkook’s lip twitched as he angrily shook his head, “She’ll be fine after she’s done throwing her tantrum. She’s prone to saying cruel things when she’s angry, she didn’t earn that title for nothing.” 

His words may be cruel, but they were a truth no one could dispute, Jungkook was the first to witness your wrath the very moment the door to your wedding chambers had closed. Though in time he grew to know you as you were truly seen by those closest to you. 

Tender to the core, there was such a profound air of softness about you that was constantly coiled tight like a venomous snake, hissing and ready to strike at anybody who dared get close to it. 

And yet again, Jungkook was struck by your venom this night. When you loved, you were like the gentlest, warmth of days, the embodiment of the sun in his eyes, incandescent and enchanting, but when you raged? 

You were nothing short of a thunderstorm, not the rain but the lightning that followed, striking yet again in a chaotic manner that no one, let alone he could predict. Your voice was like a war drum that would not be silenced. Areum only raised her brows at this, “Right…well, let me know how that goes for you little nephew. Betrayal is easily the deepest wound one can inflict, lest we all know that here. Goodnight.” 

She spoke with finality before she exited the room, leaving Jungkook alone with his uncle. 

Silence lingered in the room, the fireplace roaring with flames and wickedly dancing as Jungkook glowered in the coals.

He only wanted your safety tonight, perhaps if he had stayed asleep, this all could have been prevented.

“Are you satisfied?” Jungkook finally asked, “She hadn’t even sent a single letter out until she began writing to her mother to inquire about Yule.” It left an empty feeling in his chest as he crossed his arms, “She’d never be a spy, it isn’t who she is.”

You were many things, a dichotomy to the court. You were soft but sharp, merciful but unforgiving, hot and cold. But of all the things you were, Jungkook knew the one thing you were not, was indefinitely, a spy.

He was consumed by paranoia when he sent for your letters to be searched, in hindsight he wondered if he had calmed his mind down, he would’ve made a different decision.

Jeong Dae walked over to him, putting a hand on his shoulder, “You did what you must to yet again secure your seat to the throne, we would never be certain until you had it done. True as Areum’s words may be, the girl will come to one day understand your reasoning.” 

Jungkook said nothing in return, his eyes still cast out over the dark kingdom, “I hope you’re right.” 

“Get some rest Jungkook,” Jeong Dae replied, “You’ll need it in the days to come.” 

Jungkook was then left alone with his thoughts before he reluctantly returned to his chambers where it laid empty just as he had woken up earlier, the bed felt entirely too big and as he laid awake in bed, staring up at the canopy a feeling began to creep into his chest that felt entirely too much like regret. 

“Princess…I’m not typically someone who pries but…is there a reason we’ve been here all morning?” Yoongi had finally spoken up after taking you to the stables at the first light of day where you had been keeping Fenrir company. 

At first you had went on a walk with him before playing with him and now you had been resting in the stables for the last hour, tenderly stroking through his fur as he rested his chin on his paws, perhaps sensing your downcast mood as he licked at your hands occasionally in comfort. 

The pup had definitely grown, he was bigger now, to some guards uncomfortably so, his head was perched at the top of your stomach when he stood tall now.

“No reason in particular…” You mumbled, not wanting to talk about it at the moment. You had so many things and feelings to sort through, and admittedly you were not used to working through it completely by yourself. 

Not only were you having to deal with Wheein being unrightfully accused of being the assassin but now with the betrayal of Jungkook having investigated you as a spy behind your back along with the news of Eunoia.

It made your head dully ache in all truthfulness, it would have been one thing if Di Jin pounced on you with a dated piece of information, something you wouldn’t have put past Jungkook to do just after your wedding. 

But two weeks ago?

Two weeks?

You felt incredibly naive and stupid to believe, geniunely that you both were closer then this. You didn’t know how to feel, about anything anymore, and more than anything you were wrought with homesickness. 

You didn’t want the gray chilled days anymore, you wanted to go home. 

Yoongi sighed in exasperation as he nodded, “Very well, then let’s discuss why you thought it was a good decision to go outside the castle after hours, by yourself, telling no one of your status and meeting up with the sworn enemy of the crown!”

Your lip jutted a little, not appreciating the scolding, but it was a foolish decision you made and the least you deserved was this for that. One thing however caused your head to shoot up right, “How did you…?” 

It was one thing for you to admit to going to the Undeside, but how could Yoongi know that you met up with Claudin? He fled the moment he got you outside the courtyard. 

“I’m Areum’s right hand and before that an assassin, I have more eyes then just my own after hours.” Yoongi’s glare furrowed, “And to let that rat take you to the Underside, did you want a death sentence Princess?”

You glumly leaned back against the wooden wall, your hand mindlessly stroking Fenrir’s side as he sprawled out at the attention, his feet digging into your side but you paid it no mind. Had you not gone to the Underside you would’ve assumed he meant all of the looming assassination threats.

But after having gone, it was only now that you realized being assassinated was a lot lower on the list of ways you could potentially die in Penumbra then you had originally thought. It was undeniable that your eyes were opened to the truth. Just about everyone in this damn kingdom wanted your head on a pike. It was a bitter pill to swallow. 

“Well it’s certainly come to my attention that a death sentence for me is far more imminent then the court ever let on. If visiting the Underside was anything to go by.” You mumbled the comment that occupied your mind. 

Yoongi ignored your question, “Send me outside if it upsets you Princess but I’m going to ask anyway, why did you go with him?” You shook your head, lip twitching with anger just as he anticipated, “I had no other choice,” You finally spoke, eyes raw with rage, “Not a single person in this castle dared to tell me anything, it’s as if, I was living in a bubble this whole time, blind to what’s been going on in the outside world. I took no pleasure in going with Claudin, but he was the only one willing to show me the truth.” 

Yoongi frowned deeply as he crossed his arms, “And how is that cold truth treating you Princess? Being ignorant is a blessing few come by these days.”

Your eyes stung with tears of rage but you refused to let them fall, “That is a luxury I was never allowed to have as a child. I tended to the disembodied civilians of children, men and women alike, all left from the wars your country waged. I stoked the fires with their bodies and choked on the ash of their bones. Ignorance was never an option.”

Yoongi huffed shaking his head, as though he didn’t particularly enjoy hearing about the mess they caused without thinking twice, “How long will you weaponize the past against Penumbra?” 

You shook your head, “It’s not a matter of weaponizing, it goes beyond Penumbra, beyond myself, it goes back to the Age of Celestia, the moment the Dryads left this earth, the moment we were stripped from our grace. That’s when our eyes were opened to the world around us, it is our curse to bear. To be savage, tooth and fang and yet wholly crave the peace of the earth.”

“Call it whatever you may, but I would always rather the unpleasant truth than the sweetness of lies.”

Yoongi said no more, leaning against the side of the wall as he shook his head. 

It was silent for a long moment before you spoke up, not wanting to bid ill with him, after all he was your personal knight, or you supposed assassin was a better interpretation. He had every right to be upset with you, but you didn’t want any more bad blood to fester. 

“Last night,” You frowned, “When Di Jin came in, it was he who announced I went to the Underside.” 

Yoonig snorted, “A pot-stirrer that one, I’m not surprised.” 

“Neither am I,” You admitted, the little time you’ve spent with Di Jin would point to such, “But it was what Jungkook said to him in return. Something that insinuated Di Jin played a hand in the Underside…?” 

‘My wife would never step foot in that pit you caused.’

Jungkook’s words rang in your ears as you glanced at Yoongi, perhaps with him being Areum’s right hand, he would have more insight into this. Yoongi however only sighed as he ran a hand through his hair before he finally took a seat upon a bale of hay that was against the wall beside him.

“While I am still indefinitely angry at you,” Yoongi glared a little before it softened, “I also want to impart some knowledge on you, seeing how serious you take this whole truthful business. While what you saw in the Underside is very real, it is only a fragment of Penumbra as a whole. It is the depths of criminal activity and the most low or dangerous of people roam.” 

“Di Jin was the captain of the Guard during the five year war, but during this time, we had serviced many into the war to help, many volunteered as well, food had to be rationed and many mourned for their men and boys that would not return. But many men also resisted to help in the war, they flooded the streets with crime of all sorts as a way to rebel against the draft,”

Yoongi frowned as he recalled those days, “While the King was busy buried in the war room, Di Jin took it upon himself to create a prison of sorts in the lowest district in the city, him and his guard raided the whole Capitol at night and threw them all in there as some means of justice and restoring order.” 

You tilted your heads in curiosity at his words. 

“And I understand the idea he had in mind,” Yoongi admitted before scoffing, “But imagine it Princess, throwing all of the lowly thieves and murders together in one place? It’d be hell on earth, well instead of murdering one another like Di Jin assumed they would, they ended up couping the whole place. Tearing it down in troves and claiming it as their own little Kingdom, it is now shrouded from the Capitol in fear of who still roams there. It is without a doubt the most dangerous part of Penumbra.” 

“So what happened to Di Jin when they all took hold of the district?” You asked, almost eager as you sat upright from your previously slumped position. 

“Well he got decommissioned,” Yoongi grinned, as if it amused him, “Conducting something on that scale without the King’s permission was a one way ticket to it, not only that but thoroughly botching it too? Because Di Jin served in the war alongside the King, he allowed him to walk free. Otherwise he’d surely be rotting in the dungeon right now.” 

You grabbed your chin in thought, “There must be a reason Di Jin is trying to say Wheein is the assassin, I just can’t make sense of it…” 

“I wouldn’t think much of it truthfully Princess,” Yoongi said with a soft lament, “I feel as though, in some cases, it purely has to do with being at the wrong place, in the wrong time.”

Somehow this horrified you even more than if it was some clever plot, “Wheein does not deserve to die- let alone at the fate of being at the wrong place and the wrong time!” 

“But think Princess,” Yoongi urged you, “If Di Jin caught the ‘assassin’ he would be back in favor with the court and more importantly, the King.”

“Why would he want the King’s favor now though?” You wondered aloud, frowning at the idea, surely Dae Seong wasn’t blind to the idea that letting Di Jin into his court was a poor idea, let alone letting the man be an advisor to him.

‘Well…You said Di Jin was the one who announced you went to the Underside, did he say anything else…?” 

You thought on it for a long moment, “No he didn’t but…” you trailed off at remembering what Yoongi previously said, how he had more than his own eyes at night, “It’s more, what he didn’t say.” 

You felt a sense of dread fill in your stomach as Yoongi urged you on, “And what would that be?” 

“You said you knew I went with Claudin,” You replied, “But Di Jin…He didn’t mention Claudin at all, just that I had been seen there…Yoongi.” 

You turned to him, something akin to the realization in your face, “After Di Jin was decommissioned from the Captain of the Guard…he became a bounty hunter. The Wolf of the West.” Yoongi's expression twisted from confusion to shock and then to pure anger as he crossed his arms, “Perfect, now we have two rats to deal with. Best we set one trap for both Princess…” 

You nodded, “Yes...you are certainly right about that.” 

The idea of facing your husband once again at the table of Namjoon’s study was less than desired, but if your judgment was right, then you would simply have to put your hurt aside, for the safety of not only Wheein but for yourself and potentially the whole of the kingdom. 

“Are you ready Princess?” Yoongi asked, grabbing the handle of the door. Taking one deep breath to calm yourself you nodded before he opened the door for you stepped inside. 

The others were in hushed voices before pausing at the sight of you, all giving you a bow except for you at the end of the table. 

Jungkook. 

His eyes were unreadable as yours at the moment, but the coldness between you both was difficult to not notice. It was hard to imagine once upon a time, this was a normal interaction to you both, now you felt oceans apart. 

“Princess,” Namjoon spoke first, his eyes filled with both concern and curiosity, “We all received word about you urgently needing to speak with us, has something new developed.”

“It has not completely revealed itself but Yoongi and I were speaking this morning and happened upon an odd but…damning clue that’s been staring us in the face this whole time…” You frowned as you walked to the table, “Please sit.” 

Everyone did so as Yoongi pushed your chair, sitting at the opposite end of the table you chose to ignore his intense stare as you began to recall the events of the evening, leaving out most details of the Underside as you were simply too embarrassed to actually speak of what you had discovered. 

After explaining your thoughts and concerns to them Jungkook was immediately the first to speak, “I’m going to slaughter that man,” There was a deep rage in his eyes, “To have the audacity to parade around in my castle, pretend to be someone he isn’t at my court. Try to murder my wife.” It was hissed out, his fingers twitching as if wanting to pick up a blade and slit the man's throat this very moment. 

“Jungkook,” Namjoon ushered in a soft chastising voice, as if scolding a younger brother that was being too hasty with his decisions, “As the Princess said, we don’t know if this is the full truth. However it is the best lead we have and most likely right. But we need to play our cards right, Dae Seong favors him, it would be best to not go in accusing him of anything without any evidence.”

“So where does that leave us then?” Hoseok frowned looking in thought, “We’ve double downed on our efforts but whatever Di Jin is hiding, it’s locked tight.” 

“It would make sense though,” Jimin frowned, leaning back in his seat, his cheek resting on his palm, “Whenever I’ve spoken to him all he’s said is cryptic things like, ‘if you side with me you’re boon will be great’ or ‘just wait watch as the chaos unfolds’.”

“Chaos unfold?” Namjoon asked with piqued curiosity. 

Jimin lifted his hands in exasperation, “Don’t ask me, I never knew what the hell my old man was on about. What I do know is that he has always put himself first. So even if he is aligned with the Rosewoods, it’s only temporary.” 

“So what?” Yoongi asked, “You think if the Rosewood’s take the crown Di Jin would simply murder them and take it for himself.” 

“That's what I would do,” Jimin shrugged, “Take’s a bastard to know a bastard.” 

“If his information is locked tight then we need to dig harder.” Jungkook replied, he looked brooding and still very much angry, “I want eyes on him at all time.” He looked to Yoongi who nodded, “And Claudin as well, as much as they can without compromising their position.” 

Everyone nodded at this before the meeting was dismissed, everyone departing until it was three who remained. 

“Yoongi, leave us.” Jungkook still sat at the opposite end of you, not even sparing the assassin a glance. 

Yoongi however did not leave as he glanced at you, as if asking for your permission if you were okay with this. 

Did you want to talk to him? Not particularly, but he was your husband and this court was only so big, you would eventually have to talk to him about it, the idea of forgiving him made you seethe in rage though. 

You were tired of compromising, tired of learning, tired of having to be understanding. 

“You may wait outside.” You finally glanced at Yoongi with a nod, he then bowed before he exited, closing the door behind him. It was silent for a long minute as you glanced around the study, it was well decorated, maps lining the walls and bookshelves filled to the brim.

It was a quaint thing, not at all organized like the great library, but absolutely Namjoon, books of all shapes and sizes crammed together, some standing up right, others laid on their side to fit inside. 

You stood up to wander around a little in curiosity, ignoring the blatant stares of your husband before you finally settled at the window out looking over the woodland of the meadow. 

“It doesn’t have to be like Y/n…” Jungkook sighed, staring at your back, a sense of yearning in his chest, as if you were so close and yet so far from his reach once again. 

“No it didn’t.” You agreed coldly, folding your arms. He acted as if you’re the one being unreasonable here when he was the one who betrayed you. 

“All you have to do-”

“Yes I know!” You snarled, turning around as fury whiplashed into your veins once more, “All I have to do! Tell me Jungkook had I not been the one to apologize first to you, would you have ever given me a chance? Had I not been the one to swallow my pride, take the lashings from you even so. All I have ever done is give. I am done giving.” Your lips trembled despite the glares you both mirrored, “I have nothing left to give. I meant every word I said to you last night. I may be many things but I am not a fool.” 

“What I did was necessary to secure the crown,” Jungkook hissed back, angry and upset with your words, as if flat out refusing to believe they were nothing but the truth you spoke, “The world is engulfed in politics, all of that of Eunoia is only rumors, rumors you were better off not festering among the thousand other things we’re dealing with. But most of all, I am not your enemy Y/n.” 

You shook your head angrily, “That may be how you feel but that isn’t how I see it Jungkook, I had every right to know about Eunoia, even if nothing more then rumors. You may not be my enemy but you are certainly not my lover.” 

Jungkook’s lip visibly twitched, as if what you had said struck a nerve before he leaned in, eyes cold as before his lips curled in an icy smile, “That’s not what you said when you were moaning like a bitch in heat stuffed full with my fingers.” 

You ignored how hot the tips of your ears burned as your hands curled into fists, you had thought Claudin would be the only person who ever provoked you enough to consider violence and yet here you stand, silenting seething in rage as you glared up at your haughty so-called husband. 

You were above slapping him, but it certainly seemed tempting. So instead you say the next best thing. 

A cruel smile on your own dancing on your lips, “Perhaps because I was imagining it being my actual lover instead of you.” 

You were suddenly jostled around, pressing against the window with his chest against your back, a hand slithering possessively around your throat, “Funny because you were moaning my name the whole time.”

It would be a lie to say you weren’t shamelessly turned on right now, the sexual tension in the room was bursting from the seams, especially so with the visitation of your last intimacy together. 

But unfortunately for Jungkook, your pride would always outwin your sex drive. “You’re doing no favors for yourself right now.” You glared over your shoulder at him. 

You were unable to, however, as his mouth was already pressing a sloppy open mouthed kiss against your skin, his voice deep and breathy against the shell of your ear, “Then let me do a favor for you.” 

When you don’t reply he turned you back to face him, his lips pressing from your neck down your chest as his hands dragged from your waist to your hips, kneeling down in front of him. 

In the moment you couldn’t help but scoff a little, suddenly grabbing a fist full of his hair, yanking hard on it to make his eyes meet yours, what surprised you however was the moan that escaped his lips.

His expression may have remained neutral but you had gotten to know him too well, the slight part of his lips, his pupils blown out from lust. 

The gesture only made you more angry, “The fact that you think head is going to fix this is a joke better left unsaid. You had your chance and now it is gone. I have things to do, do not bother me again.” 

You shoved his head away from you before you stepped away from him, walking out the door without looking back. 

‘Are you ready to go Princess?” 

“More than ready.” 

“Would you like to visit Wheein meanwhile?” 

Your gaze shot up, “I can do that?” It felt like a stupid question, you were the Crowned Princess, it felt as if you shouldn’t even need to ask but given this was Penumbra, you didn’t know how things work. 

Of course you had heard of dungeons before but you had never been in one, nor did one even exist in Eunoia, the closest equivalent were called Repentance Rooms, and they were nothing like a dungeon, they were clean and well lit with barred windows captives could look out of. 

Comfortable even, they were for the liminal time between a captive being captured and trialed and if their punishment was severe they would be sent to the housing district next. 

You wouldn’t even know where to begin looking for a dungeon. 

Yoongi frowned at your words, “Well, you certainly can but last thing you want is for Di Jin to catch you snooping about.” 

“Can you make sure I’m not seen?” You stood up, folding your hands together as you stared at Yoongi pensively. 

His lips curled into a small smile as he kneeled down in front of you, grabbing your hand, “Of course, my lady. But just know there will be guards that are siding with Di Jin, if they see you they’ll alert him immediately.” 

Your face was covered with a hood and Yoongi had skillfully guided you along the narrow halls as you entered the lower levels of the castle where everything was dark and dimly lit, the smell of must becoming overpowering as guards patrolled each hall. 

Just the dim lights and dank smell made you increasingly worried, you had heard about dungeons before what it meant for captives in other kingdoms, but never thought you’d live to see one yourself. 

A naive thought once upon a time. But here you were, visiting your dearest maid who was being wrongfully accused of something you knew in your heart she’d never do. 

Yoongi had you hide in one last nook before he guided you to the very last dungeon, “Okay,” He spoke softly, “You’ll have only a few minutes with her, be brief.” 

You nodded as you crouched down, making your way to the gate, the sight broke your heart, you could hear a soft sob but Wheein was laid down on the ground, nothing but a pile of straw hay serving as a bed in a windowless cell. 

“Oh Wheein,” Your eyes immediately welled with tears, “I’m so sorry.” 

She jolted, scrambling to get up before she gapped at the sight of you, tearings streaming down her face before she crawled to the bars, “Princess.” She wept softly, before reaching throught the bars to you. 

Your arms curled around her as best as possible as she whimpered quietly, “I don’t want to die! Please! They’ll burn me! That’s what Di Jin will do, please!” 

“Princess,” Yoongi ushered out, “One more minute.”

“Shh!” You ushered, trying to keep your voice down as you pulled away from her, grabbing her soft cheeks in your hands, “We aren’t going to let that happen! Okay?” You nodded, “We’ll find a way to prove your innocence I swear by it Wheein.” 

Wheein only continued to cry, shaking her head, “He’s going to kill me Princess, I’ve dreamt of it for so long, I just know it.” 

You grabbed her hands into yours squeezing them tight as your heart ached seeing her in so many tears, “Not as long as I’m alive he won’t,” New determination rushed into your body, anger that hell had not rage against burning in your veins, “I swear on Galadria that I will serve justice where it is due.” 

“Princess! We need to go.” Yoongi whispered out, ushering you quickly. 

Wheein closed her eyes as tears trickled down her face but said no more, quickly you ushered her into one last hug before you whispered, “I’ll return soon! We better news than I have now.” 

“Please Princess, be safe.”

Those were her last whispered words before Yoongi quickly guided you back to a crook to hide as the guards made their rotation. Unfortunately for Wheein, you had no intentions of being safe, you were going to prove her innocence at whatever cost was needed. 

When you had first been told by the King, Dae Seong that you would be expected to dine with the family once a week, it had filled you with nothing but dread. Being among three men at the time was daunting.

Two which didn’t take you seriously at all, and of course the third, your husband who would either pretend you didn’t exist, or give you an icy stare and then proceed to pretend you didn’t exist.

But after the incident in the market place, Jungkook and you had somehow grown closer, fonder of one another, came to an understanding of one another and where you both had come from. 

Two weeks ago…

Your heart squeezed as you stared in the mirror, several maids floated in and out of your room and while you always tried to be kind, today you felt exhausted, only giving simple answers to whatever they asked.

What did you do two weeks ago that finally made him decide to have you spied on? You had gotten into an argument that week- at the time you thought it stupid but only now did you reflect back and realize Jungkook was venomously jealous of any inkling of an idea of Seokjin ever being your lover. 

Not only this but an odd inferiority complex he has that he would rather die than ever admit too. But…why? It made your eyes sting with tears that you refused to shed. You had said hurtful things during that argument but surely it wasn’t enough to make him do that? You’ve had worse arguments with him before that moment.

You just didn’t understand. 

“Finished Your Highness.”

The maid placed the crown on your head as you stared at yourself in the mirror, taking it in, it was heavier then it looked, but then again it was made of Noxtria metal, elaborately weaving with sharp, angles stones of onyx and metal winging out of it's sides and one large center piece in the middle.

The maids all courtesy to you, you offered a weak smile and thanks before they were dismissed. 

You took a deep shaky breath, wiping your eyes before any real tears had fallen. You just had to get through tonight, somehow, despite all of the time that had passed, it felt as if you were in some liminal space between how you first felt going to a family dinner and what it had slowly turned in too. 

Family dinner was expected tonight, however an additional note had been added on, Di Jin and close friends of the family would be attending tonight. Knowing your friends, and though you were upset with Jungkook- that they would be there brought you comfort. 

But having to deal with Di Jin all evening was not something you wanted to deal with. 

However, you were not about to cower away from him, your eyes had gone from mournful to near vengeful as you glared in the mirror, your hair elaborately done for the night by your request and a specific dress for the occasion. 

It had been hanging for a long while and you had truthfully shied away from it, feeling it was a bit too Penumbrian even for you. 

But not tonight.

It was a raven black gown, cold metal weaved into leaves intricately, an armored sweetheart neckline that wrapped all the way up to your throat, your upperarm dawned with cufflets that flowed with even more black fabric and a solid band of metal cinching your waist. 

Black had become a color of mourning in Eunoia, it was something you wore daily during the Five Year war while working in the tents as a healer. But something dawned on you as you looked through your gowns earlier in the evening. 

Before that, during the Age of Celestia, it was said that black was the color of power. Queen Celestia wore it for her ascension after devouring her husband, becoming the sole ruler of Eunoia. 

You didn’t like to think you took after the gruesome woman. But something that wasn’t often talked about was Celestia and Galadria were sisters. You shared just as much blood from one as the other. 

And right now, you wanted to wield power, not grief. 

Standing upright you were escorted down the hall, heads turned in your direction from various aristocrats to maids and servants alike as you kept your head held high and an unwelcoming expression on your face. 

The double doors were shut as per usual and though you had walked through them many times, tonight you felt just as anxious as you had the very first time as they opened. Every set of eyes at the table had turned to you, seeing as you had clearly interrupted the conversation that went on. 

Many at the table had quickly stood up, bowing to you, some more begrudging than others as your eyes locked onto Di Jin’s, his lip twitching a little as he bowed, your expression stayed as unwelcoming as before. 

You may not have been a Jeon by blood but you would certainly pretend you had their trademark cold glare tonight.

Taehyun who had been standing behind Jungkook’s chair had stepped back to pulled the empty chair out beside his, your cold look softened only a little for him, offering a brief tiny smile of thanks as he pushed you in. 

Jungkook had previously looked bored, crown of his own on his head, though from how he slumped in his chair it was just a hair crooked, dark hair dusting in front of his eyes as they met yours. 

And for the briefest moment you felt just a bit stronger having him by your side before anger quelled in you once more at the memory, two weeks, for some reason two weeks ago he chose to no longer trust you. 

Your expression remained as you looked away from him as the voice of Di Jin spoke, “It’s good to see the Princess can finally grace us with her presence.” 

“Yes, just in time for the meal, seeing as the conversation wasn’t much to look forward to.” A mocking smile curled on your lips, never before did you usually take pleasure in having power over someone, but you were experiencing many firsts in Penumbra. 

No matter how much Di Jin disliked you, he knew better than to openly disrespect you, no matter how hard he tried to undermine you in his discreet way. 

“What matters is the Princess is here now,” Jeong Dae’s gaze narrowed on Di Jin before nodding, “let us all dine now. Tell me, the progress on the market is coming along, yes?” 

You stared into your glass of wine as you swirled in, “Yes, they’re starting to lay the foundation down. Though I must confess, my servant being thrown in the dungeon has caused quite a bit of a mess in my schedule.” 

An uncomfortable energy had taken over the table as you shrugged, taking a long drink from your cup, you were not going to sit here and pretend along with everyone else that Di Jin had not done what he had.

“It’s a necessary precaution, once this assassin business has been taken care of you’ll have your servant back,” Dae Seong answered gruffly, not appreciating your lack of tack, “But should more incriminating evidence come out, a servant is expandable and just as easily replaceable.”

Your gaze slowly pulled to his as the silence at the table ensued once more, when had human life become so expandable as he said? 

You understood less and less as to why they felt this way, why they chose to believe this.

After a long moment your lips twisted into a grin that looked more like a grimace, “I thought you might say that your Majesty.” You however said nothing else as you took another drink from your cup.

The table was quiet for a long moment and nobody spoke, despite the silence it was almost comforting to you, to know that your words held some sort of weight to them even if it felt in the moment they were nothing more than an illusion to how you truly felt. 

“Not to interrupt this moment, but perhaps we should discuss the east, it's come to our attention that Kyoto has movement in the east, if they continue our progress will be delayed“ Jimin spoke up, a frown on his face with evident worry, “We've been tracking them down, and it seems they're making a sort of pattern, if I didn't know any better I'd say they were mapping out the best way to invade us.”

“That would be hasty on their part,” Jeong Dae spoke up, “We just passed The Rite of Peace this year, they wouldn’t be foolish to invade us just after the prince and princess wed.”

“Fools aren't so different from the brave,” Jungkook spoke up, swirling his goblet of wine in his hand looking rather bored, though his gaze occasionally went to you, as if hoping you would be looking at him, “ Would it be that outlandish to assume, that they do not care about the Rite of Peace?” 

“This is true,” Di Jin, surprisingly spoke up with agreement, “After all, why would the world let a nation as glorious as us live for one simple girl.”

There was a certain amount of venom in his tone that did not surpass you, though you didn't let it disturb you as it once may have. you suppose somewhere along the line, that you had gotten used to an unsurpassable amount of hatred that for some reason people in Penumbra felt entitled to take out on you.

it was a ugly truth, but it was the truth nonetheless, and Di Jin had a point, no matter how unpleasant it was, why would the world let a nation that had killed countless people, destroyed homes, decimated nations live on, if there is one thing you had learned in Eunoia, it was that you were indeed replaceable.

Dare you say you felt almost as if you were a sacrificial lamb, sent to slaughter, and whether you died by an assassin or by an invasion, did it ever truly matter in the end? You weren't sure. 

Jungkook did not speak, but he didn't need words to convey his feelings, his glare was enough to display his displeasure in Di Jin’s words.

Hoseok cut in, “Perhaps, but if they were to invade, there's no telling what kind of uproar it would cause with other nations. Especially if they kill the princess in the process, even if it is only one person, nobody can deny the influence Eunoian Princess has.” 

“Regardless, it would be wise to have a plan.”  Namjoon said diplomacy and his voice as he attempted to steer the conversation into a less hostile direction, “The people are restless, and with word having gotten out about Eunoia training soldiers along with Kimhae, and now Kyoto, they'll need guidance especially as winter approaches.” 

You sharply inhaled, trying to not let anger seep through your veins again, though tempting, just the idea of Eunoia training soldiers was outlandish, ever since the Age of Celestia soldiers have been out of the question, if the rumors were true why would they start now?

Nothing made sense, you tried to ignore the stares, but it was evident that people in the room did not trust you, after all even your own husband felt he could not trust you at one time. 

Two weeks ago, no matter how hard you tried your mind kept going back to two weeks ago, what had you done two weeks ago to warrant his distrust, what could you have changed to have changed his mind.

Just the thought made your heart ache and for a brief moment your anger had subsided.

“It would only be right to assume that Eunoia and Kimhae have their own plans to invade us. it would be within our best interest to strike first if that is the case.” Di Jin lifted his goblet before taking a long drink.

I'm just like that your anger had returned.

But before you could speak, your husband had beat you to it, anger evident in his voice as he spoke, “When we wrote the Rite of Peace, we promised Eunoia protection should someone ever threaten Invasion on them, they are honorable, if they desire to have their own protection let them have it, but do not sit at my table and claim loyalty to my family, and then proceed to disrespect my wife and her country in front of me.” 

Di Jin laughed, “You've got a lot to learn boy, love rarely saves anyone and the few bastards it does, life has a certain way of shortening their lives.”

“And men who disrespect women, tend to live even shorter lives.” Jungkook said, his voice having grown a little darker and expressionless, his fingers now drumming against the table as if aching to reach across it and wrap his knuckles around Di Jin’s neck.

“Regardless of Kimhae and Kyoto, I can only speak for my own nation, and I can swear this we are pacifists by nature, we do not desire for nor want bloodshed, but do not mistake our heritage, we do bite back should we be provoked, after all, history proves that.” You spoke, your voice calm, “Should we be treated fairly, you will only expect kindness in return, for that is who my people are, while I understand your caution, we created the Rite of Peace for its very name, to bring peace to the world and put these past grudges to rest. And I intend to keep it that way to the best of my ability.” 

“It seems you've all mistaken this dinner, we are here to gather and make merry not discuss politics,” Dae Seong looked much like his son, bored by the conversation, “We will not strike first, nor will we feed into their antics, after all this was the very reason I recalled the march to the East, there is no reason to wage war when our enemies have been defeated.”

You glanced around, noting the expressions on some of your friends' faces, it was evident just about nobody agreed with Dae Seong in one way or another, But nobody dared express how they felt, after all he was the king. 

The dinner had went on for the rest of the evening without much of a hiccup, granted it gave you a headache and you had found yourself sunk back into your chair the whole time, more than anything you wanted to get out of your seat and away from your husband, who had been staring at you with puppy eyes most of the evening.

Occasionally you'd watch his fingers twitch as if aching to reach out to you, to pull your chair closer, to brush your hair from your face, or to fix a piece of your dress that I've been wrinkled, but he knew better rather he kept his hand in his lap or against his cup, his sixth glass might you add.

In some ways you understood that this was perhaps unfair on your part, the more you thought about it the more you realized that you could have confided him and you had chosen not to, this was in some ways your fault as well but it did not take away the hurt you felt, that you felt you were closer than this.

But it seemed you both were wrong in many ways and you weren't certain of how to fix this, if you even wanted to fix this anymore, what you did know was that you were at a breaking point, you were uncertain of how much more you could take before you would break.

And every time you thought it couldn't get worse it without a doubt somehow got worse, but surely you would hit a plateau, your husband had lied to you, your servant was on trial for your attempted assassination, and you found out your home country was enlisting soldiers into a military, to say your life had fallen apart was an understatement.

Or at least that was how you felt.

You had been sat in bed, a book in hand though you hadn't read it all evening, and once again no matter how hard you tried to focus a book was just a book, and words were just words, you could read but the sentence just kept going over your head each time you read it, no matter how hard you tried, you just couldn't focus.

A knock at your door however had drew you from your thoughts causing you to stand up reluctantly before trudging over and opening the door

The person who stood before you was unshocking to you, after all it seemed since the unsavory reveal of his deeds your husband could hardly stay away from you, no matter how many times you would ask him to give you space, in fact he seem to be doing the opposite these days.

“I know you don’t wish to see me-”

You abruptly tried to shut the door but his arm caught against the door. 

“Y/n just listen to me,” Jungkook’s voice was weak, hair brushing over his eyes but the desperation in them was pathetic, “Let me talk, please.” 

“You’re drunk Jungkook,” Your teeth gritted but you didn’t try to force the door anymore, your hand still curled tight against the knob as you glared at him. He reeked of liquor and it was evident as his white shirt had a large inky red spill down the front that had been dried out, this was his sleep shirt which meant he hadn’t stopped drinking even after everyone had retired. 

Jungkook had one hand still flat against the door keeping it ajar and the other on the frame as he peered down at you, “I just wanted to see you, to tell you in my own words, I was complacent about your feelings, about my own. I have no excuses left, I have no words to defend myself, only my desire to be with you.”

You shook your head, trying to not let your heart twist further in pain, you wanted to look past this, to let it go, but how could you? Spying through letters was the first step, how could you know this wasn’t some elaborate plan all along to use you?

“It’s not that easy Jungkook,” You tried to contain the grief in your voice, guilt eating you up the more you thought of your own actions, “I should’ve trusted you more, confided in you about what I heard from Claudin, but I didn’t. I think it’s best if whatever this, does not continue.”

It was Jungkook’s turn to shake his head, his knuckles curling against the door, “We’ve both made mistakes. Forgive yourself Y/n and forgive me. Let me prove myself to you, let me earn your love.”

You roughly brushed the tears from your cheeks, “We were never meant to be together Jungkook, you know that just as well a I do-” 

You were cut off abruptly by his hand suddenly snaking through the small gap of the door,  wrapping around your waist and his lips immediately pressing into yours in a devouring hold, a surprised whimper escaped you at his iron hold increasingly becoming tighter on your waist. 

Your head was telling you one thing, but your heart was so desperately wanting another.

His other hand immediately snaked around your throat in a firm grip, not tight but not loose as you tried your best to not give into the temptation to melt into his hold but it was becoming more difficult when his tongue had pushed between your lips in determination. 

You broke, unable to resist the soft moan that escaped you as you felt your back push against the wall, arms wrapping around his neck before curling into his soft locks, giving them a soft yank as he moaned into your mouth,

You could taste the sweet wine still lingering on his lips, the unmistakable feeling curling into your stomach as you let yourself surrender to him for the briefest moment, and for the brief moment, everything felt better.

Two weeks ago…

The realization quickly followed after you and anger kindled in your veins once more, your hands had quickly slid to his shoulders to push back against him, “Jeon Jungkook!” You broke the kiss by turning your head with a hiss. 

Jungkook didn’t relent though his forehead pressing against yours as he heaved a breath, “What have you done to me? Some ancient dryad magick?” He gave a mirthless smile, “You are all I can ever think about from the moment I wake up to the moment I go to bed, seeing you cry makes me want to kill whatever is causing them, I’m drowning in you my sweet doe. I’m intoxicated and desperate so indulge me,”

“Tell me what I need to do to earn your forgiveness.” Jungkook ushered out, wet kissing being placed on your neck as the internal battle waged war in your head, one part of you wanting to immediately crumble but the other was indignant, this relationship surely would not end well.

At one time when you were younger, you would have laughed, after all you were married. But your eyes had been opened, things were never that simple, not when one was a Princess, marriage was contract, love was a luxury.

He broke away from you only a little, almost nose to nose with you and hair hanging over his eyes like a cloud, “I thought I knew love, I thought I knew many things before I met you,” His hands trembled as if the emotions were too powerful, “But it turns out I know nothing. Without you, I know nothing.”

“Jungkook…” You ushered out quietly, shaking your head as you tried to swallow down the hurt that began to bubble once more. 

“I feel like I’m being consumed by you,” Jungkook confessed, his hand squeezing your neck ever so slightly, his thumb rubbing softly along your windpipe, “It feels like you’re very being is sucking the soul from my body. And now that I’ve had you,” His voice broke only a little, his eyes like steel as he whispered a growl, “I would die without you.” 

“Jungkook!” You whispered out frantically at the sight of him letting you go only to kneel down on both knees. 

“Let me repeat my question; what do I have to do to earn your forgiveness?” Jungkook’s eyes burned with a bright intensity that nearly frightened you, his hand stroking up your thigh, “Is it Wheein? I’ll get her back for you. I’ll burn this entire fucking kingdom and rebuild it if I have too.” 

Was he hearing himself right now!?

You were panicked at his words and his actions, he had pushed his way into your room but the door was wide open, anybody could walk down this corridor and overhear him! “You can start by getting off the ground and going to bed!” You hissed out panickedly, flailing your hands to gesture him to stand, “And give me some time to think about it! Jungkook I…so much has happened I just need time! There’s no reason for you to say something so damning!” 

“I mean every word I’m saying.” Jungkook’s voice was serious, his eyes burning into you as he gazed up at you. 

It was silent for a long moment and Jungkook’s gaze did not lighten, hesitantly you lowered a hand down to his head, running your nails through his hair, it caused his lids to lower until they closed, his forehead resting against your thigh, hands still delicately trembling against your thighs.

“If you want my love so desperately, then give me time and space,” You whispered out, “You’re right, we’ve both made mistakes, and they can be forgiven, but forgiveness takes time that cannot be rushed.” 

“I can’t lose you.” Jungkook mumbled out, his weight slowly sinking into you. 

“You won’t.” Your words however went unheard as he slumped down, before collapsing to the ground, passed out. 

You stared down at him for a long moment before you sighed, “I’m sorry but you’re not spending the night here.” You stepped over him as you walked to the door, glancing around, the guard at your door must have been dismissed by him. 

You were in luck however as a pair of guards were at the end of the hall, walking quietly as they spoke, you flagged them down, requesting they find Taehyun and then have your guard returned to your door. 

Shortly Taehyun had arrived, the poor boy looking half asleep himself as he took in his Prince’s slumped figure on the ground, “He didn’t cause too many problems did he, Princess?” 

You shook your head, “No more than he usually does, I apologize for interrupting your night Taehyun, thank you for taking him back to his room.”

Taehyun offered a tired smile, “Of course your Highness, have a restful night.” He hauled Jungkook up with a groan, and briefly you wondered if Taehyun could even carry him, but he did manage to get him out the door and you supposed that was good enough.

Taking a shaky breath you sat back down in your bed, deciding you would be reading deep into the night, as you surely wouldn't be getting any rest regardless.

It was late morning and you had been eating out on the second floor terrace, the day was slightly warmer but still gray and cloudy, it made you depressed and you briefly wondered just how Penumbrian’s coped with it. 

But then again, they knew no different, for them, this was normal. 

You envied that.

“You mind if I join, Princess?” 

You twisted in your seat at the sight behind you, “Areum, of course, please have a seat.” You gestured to the empty table. 

You had been sitting out here alone, Yoongi on the inside as you wanted a moment to yourself but deep down you felt alone and you deeply missed Wheein’s company, each passing day made you more anxious, and the gap in your heart widen even more. 

Many questions filled your head, how would you set one trap to catch both Di Jin and Claudin in? You were not in a favorable position either way, Di Jin had a personal connection to the king and Dae Seong would need a damn good reason to believe you.

And you would have to be extra careful navigating Claudin as the Rosewood ties with the Jeon’s was already strained, one weak accusation and it could cause a civil war. 

“You seem so sullied these days Princess,” Areum commented as she sat next to you, promptly grabbing a plate and stacking it with rice cakes.

“I miss when I first arrived here,” You admitted, “Things weren’t complicated the way they are now.” 

“Perhaps,” Areum agreed, “But my, my, look how far you’ve come. I heard from your husband this morning. He looked dreadful.”

Your lips curled into a brief grimace at the memory, he looked rough last night, you couldn’t possibly imagine what he looked like when he woke up, no doubt hungover and upset. 

“What of it?” You felt slightly nervous, had someone overheard Jungkook’s over dramatic declaration last night?

“He asked me to take you to the Jeon Estate,” Areum smiled at your surprised and confused expression, “The estate was created for the royal family during the early days of Penumbra when the castle had yet to be built. It’s no longer used regularly, but occasionally we still hold family celebrations there for privacy. It’s deep in the woodland forest, past the Seer’s refuge.” 

“...May I ask why?” You frowned, uncertain of how to feel about this, there was so much at stake, how could Jungkook just expect you to leave…?

Areum smiled, “Something about wanting to allow you to have space and piece of mind. I understand your feelings Princess, I can’t imagine the weight you must be feeling right now, and I certainly wouldn’t blame you if you want to stay here at the castle.” 

Areum tapped her chin, “However I will say this much, the Estate has something primal to it, some may even call it magick. If you are seeking answers, there is no better place to meditate than there.” 

“I’ll think about it.” You nodded as you gazed out over the meadow in thought. 

Perhaps time away from the castle and Jungkook would serve you well.

#wicked

[ittomi]

evolution of a lover's heart  | 08 (final)

the rules are simple: first one to take the virginity wins.

pairing: fuckboy!jk x f reader

genre: fluff, angst, college au, (post collage au), fuckboy au, bet au

word count: 16.7k

warnings:  scenes with smutty undertones like someone being tied up naked, boob fondling, naked confessions, drunk (and ...horny) reader this time lol and sweetie gguk, a hunky gguk at the beach, a LOT of tears. and the biggest warning(disclaimer) of them all: i'm not a poet lol

rating: NC-17 – Adults Only

masterlist

part 8/8 previous | next>

© evolution of a lover’s heart is copyright jeonstudios 2023. this fic can not be modified, re-posted, or translated without my permission.

playlist

author's note: so here it is, the end! <3

It’s mid-December when you’re out with Jeongguk, Jin, Jin’s wife Sana, Tae, and Jimin and his girlfriend Ryujin.

After you’ve been sitting in a large booth on the upper floor for a while, getting just a tiny bit tipsy, you and Jeongguk soon find yourselves on the bottom floor, where the music is louder and the lights are lower.

He follows you into the dancing crowd, smiling back at you, entertained when you smirk at him and grip his shirt to pull him further along.

“So… you come here often?” you speak, throwing your arm around his neck and starting to move to the sensual beat.

Jeongguk laughs, his hands finding your hips. “Yeah,” he improvises, “I’m here basically every day. But I haven’t seen you around here.”

Your heart beats almost erratically at a list of things. The proximity between you, the feeling of his sturdy shoulders under your arm and his warm chest so close to yours. It skips a few beats at the familiar scent of him, and the way you can barely tear your eyes away from his. He peers down at you fondly and playfully, and you’re entirely lost in it.

“You might need glasses cause I’m also here everyday. In fact, I actually live here,” you gesture toward the dance floor that you’ve only visited once before.

Jeongguk shakes his head, “Oh, no, honey, there’s nothing wrong with my eyes, and I think you’re lying because I definitely would’ve noticed you.”

His words warm your veins, yet make a chill run over your skin. You press yourself closer to him.

For a while, you dance. A little bit of grinding, Jeongguk whispering things in your ear, and also a little bit of jumping when the DJ plays a really good song. And tons of laughter and smiling.

Then, Jeongguk decides that he wants more beer, and coincidentally enough, you have to visit the ladies’ room to pee out some.

Naturally, you agree to meet at the smaller bar on the bottom floor afterward, and so, you set out to find the bathroom.

There’s a bit of a line unfortunately, so it takes you around ten minutes to get into a stall, pee out all the beer and the little wine you’ve had, and wash your hands.

Then, the only thing remaining is to find your boyfriend again. It doesn’t prove to be very difficult; he’s at the place you decided to meet, but as you approach, you spot a woman next to him at the bar.

You don’t think very much of it at first–Jeongguk is a very attractive man, and it’s frankly inevitable that he’ll get hit on–but the closer you come, the more your forehead creases in confusion.

The woman is pretty tall and she’s honestly very beautiful. But Jeongguk looks… uncomfortable. Not massively so, but… well, you know him very well by now.

When you reach them, you tap Jeongguk’s shoulder, running your hand down his arm to hold his hand, “Hey, do you wanna find the others?”

He looks down at you, “Uh… uhm, yeah.”

“Who’s this?”

You turn your attention toward the woman, not expecting her to not take the hint. You hear Jeongguk introduce you over the music, “This is my, uh, girlfriend, Y–,” he says.

“Oh, you’ve got a new girlfriend?” she asks, also having to raise her voice over the music, and is that a flash of… distaste in her eyes?

“Well,” she continues when there’s no answer, “since you’re too busy to answer my calls, I guess I have to tell you this way. I’m pregnant. Four months.”

She lowers one of her hands, stroking it gently over her belly that appears pretty flat. Not that that tells you anything, some people take longer to show and others don’t show very much at all.

With your heart at a standstill, the first thing you do is look at Jeongguk. And he looks at you, eyes wide and mouth slightly open.

“No, that can’t be, I didn’t–we didn’t–”

Four months would mean that they had sex in… the middle of August. Which was when you were broken up. It also happened to be when Taehyung said that Tzuyu called.

Tzuyu.

“Are you gonna take responsibility for once, Jeongguk? Not try to lie your way out of it like you always do?”

You see how he struggles to find his words, the insecurity creeping back up again. He opens his mouth but nothing comes out. The music is loud.

“Just this once, can you try to think of anyone but yourself?”

The thing is that Tzuyu looks genuine. There’s a crease of worry between her eyebrows, and she appears sincerely frustrated, maybe even distraught. Like she’s been trying to reach the fuckboy who got her pregnant but who doesn’t want to step up.

Your first instinct is always to believe the woman, but at this moment, you only think of one person. Jeongguk. You try to push the thoughts of a baby away. If she is pregnant with his child, then that complicates everything, but you’re not angry or upset because you were broken up. 

You don’t like the thought that he went back to her, but you don’t blame him. 

However, if there is no baby–or there is but it isn’t his–then she’s trying to sabotage her ex’s relationship, maybe in order to get him back.

Your brain is still processing the situation when you feel Jeongguk gently pull his hand from yours, but when you turn your head to look at him, he looks at her. His head is lowered slightly, and his posture isn’t the same as only ten minutes ago when he carried his head high and his back straight. 

It’s a heartbreaking but instant realization that he’s trying to remove himself from you. Or rather, remove you from the mess he thinks he’s made.

“Nothing?” Tzuyu asks calmly, directed solely at Jeongguk.

His eyes flicker from side to side anxiously, but before he can try to say anything, you grab his hand again.

“Have you had an ultrasound?” you speak up, remaining polite and soft-spoken as you meet Tzuyu’s eyes when she turns to you. “At four months, you’ve probably had one done, right? And he would like to see the pictures. If you haven’t, then he wants you to make an appointment as soon as possible so he can go with you.”

It’s barely noticeable, especially in the low light, how she flutters her eyes in surprise, and you feel the weight of Jeongguk’s gaze on the side of your face. 

“And he wants a paternity test as well, preferably before you deliver,” you continue, stroking your thumb over his skin.

“Are you accusing me of being a liar?” Tzuyu questions, her voice even louder than it needs to be.

“No, we just want to do everything right.”

“‘We?’ This is none of your business; it’s between me and him.”

For the first time, your voice turns stern, “No, you lost that right when you treated him like you did.”

“And who are you to decide that? Actually, who are you even? Me and Jeongguk go way back, and do I have to remind you that he came to me, which led to this,” she motions to her stomach, “in the first place.”

From appearing like any sane person just moments ago, you see how her true colors start to shine through. You heard Jeongguk introduce you as his girlfriend, but you’re not sure if she knows how long you’ve been together, and that, although broken up, he was with you in August. If she doesn’t, you don’t want to give her any more ammunition.

“He already told you I’m his girlfriend, and no offense, but are you five years old? It doesn’t  matter who’s known him the longest, but if it’s so important to you, we first met in college.”

For half a second, Tzuyu’s eyes widen, and she looks between you and Jeongguk.

“College?”

“Yeah.”

She drops her shoulders. “You know what? Fuck you. You’ll be a shit father anyway.”

You blink at the sudden change as she pushes her way in between you, forcing your hands apart.

“Let him know when to take you to the hospital,” you call after her, but you don’t get much of a response except a half-assed wave.

Music still blaring, you turn to Jeongguk. He’s looking somewhere else, gaze lost avoidingly into the sea of people.

Gently, you reach for his hand, smiling when he looks down at you, and slowly intertwining your fingers.

His eyes are cautious, and you know. You know. Although tall and strong, it’s all in his eyes, so easy to read. It’s like being looked at by a helpless little deer kid, prepared to be abandoned. Bambi.

He wants to leave. You can tell that he considers it just to make it easier for you, even if it’s illogical. 

“I’ve got you,” you say, perhaps a bit too quietly, but you’re certain he read it on your lips anyway.

His hand is warm in yours. You see him mumble a ‘why?’

“Let’s go outside.”

You lead the way, Jeongguk’s hand firmly held in yours the whole journey through the dancing and drinking people. Well outside, you take a deep breath. The December air is cold, and you didn’t bring your jackets, but there’s no need as you’ll return into the warmth soon enough. 

“You okay?” you ask, attempting to meet his eyes, but he looks straight ahead at the street.

“Why would you do all this?”

“Do what? Defend you? Believe you?”

“Yes?” he turns his head to finally meet your eyes. His are serious and sad. “You know as well as I do that I only ever… my first–and often only–priority is always me, so why would you…”

“Stay?”

He quiets down and looks away again.

“Cause you’re my birdy, my pup, or whatever. I know you, and you said you didn’t go and see her, and even if you did, we were broken up, and you were free to do whatever. I wouldn’t be mad, I believe you. You’re my best friend and so far from selfish there is.”

You’re rambling, trying to get your point across. Jeongguk keeps his head straight, not looking at you beside him.

“Besides, did you see her when we left? She pulled her stomach back in and went to drink at the bar. She’s just trying to sabotage.”

It’s cold outside, the freezing air starting to get to you. You lean into his side.

A moment of silence passes. Your head is at a standstill while your fingers start to go numb.

“Are you okay?”

Surprised, you lean away to look up at his face. His eyes are on the way you’re holding his hand like your life depends on it.

“Yeah. I’m just trying to keep you from leaving me,” you laugh nervously. “Cause, if you leave me here all alone because of this, I think I’ll break.”

His eyes widen subtly, and he turns to face you entirely. “I’m not… I’m not leaving,” he assures, pulling you closer and hugging you to his chest. “It’s cold, let’s get inside.”

But your feet aren’t moving like his, and he has to stop and look back at you where you stand. 

“Come here,” he nods, and when you don’t, he pulls on your hand until you’re in his arms. “Thank you for standing up for me. I’m not leaving. It’s… hard, it really is, but I’m not leaving. Now, let’s go get our stuff and say goodbye and we can go home, okay?”

“Okay,” you nod meagerly against his warm chest. You’re quick to let go when the first signs come, but not with Jeongguk. Not anymore. Even if it’s a pathetic attempt, you have to fight at least a bit.

At home in his apartment, you lie on top of him between the warm sheets, and you talk it out. How you definitely knew Tzuyu was faking but also how you wouldn't have left even if he found out he had a kid on the way. He offered to help you raise Namjoon’s baby, back when all you were were friends, and how could you do anything but the same for him? You love him.

Jeongguk tells you that it’s difficult to break old habits, but that he at least thinks he’s on the right path. Tzuyu never reaches out again.

Eventually, the day of Jeongguk’s first test arrives. At least according to him. It’s your first holiday together, not including Christmas because no one who is a part of a Christmas-celebrating society could ever evade its snowy claws. 

It’s Valentine’s.

Valentine’s has never held much importance to you; you’ve never been with anyone who really wanted to celebrate it, and it honestly doesn’t matter a whole lot to you either.

Still, you buy a bracelet for Jeongguk, the same kind he really liked but accidentally broke when he forgot to remove it at the gym. And you pick up a single red rose on your way from the train station. Unfortunately, you had an early meeting in a different city and thus had to spend the previous night at a hotel.

Like always, you steer your steps toward Jeongguk’s apartment without as much as a glance toward your own. You tap your thumb and index finger together. You haven’t heard from him today, and that makes you a little nervous that today’s date might’ve slipped his mind. 

It would definitely sadden you, but only because you know how shit that would make him feel. Especially now that you’ve gotten him a gift.

You could’ve reminded him, but you also know how bad it would make him feel like to have to be reminded. Or like you don’t trust him to remember.

So your plan is to not make a big deal out of it if it turns out that he has forgotten it.

The apartment is quiet when you unlock the door and step inside, and the moment you bend down to remove your shoes, you’re reminded how incredibly tired you are.

”Gguk?” You call, taking your jacket off too and hanging it on the coat rack. ”Love?”

To be on the safe side, you place the plastic-wrapped rose on the shelf for the moment.

”In the bedroom,” his voice rings.

Having missed him for more than twenty four hours, you immediately set your sight on the closed bedroom door.

You’re not sure what you expected Jeongguk to be doing inside, maybe napping or watching something on his laptop. Perhaps even cleaning out his closet. 

What you didn’t expect was to be greeted by him in the bed, seemingly naked and tied up.

It makes you falter in your step as you take him in. His naked chest and arms, hands tied by rope to the headboard, his messy black hair, and the way the sheets rest just above his hips, dangerously low.

”How long have you been like that?” you ask, eyeing the rope. It doesn’t look like something he can get out of by himself. ”What if there was a fire or something?”

Jeongguk smiles, ”Don’t worry, I only slipped my hands into them as I heard you unlock the door.”

”Oh. Okay. Good. …So… why are you tied up?” you question, continuing to look him up and down. Truth be told, you’ve never seen anything more mouthwatering.

”Well, it’s Valentine’s—happy Valentine’s—and I remember you saying that you wished you could tie me up like two weeks ago? So… you can. Or, I mean, I am.”

You chuckle fondly, wrangling your sweatshirt from your body and leaving you in a t-shirt and jeans. ”Happy Valentine’s.”

Next to go are the jeans, and you catch Jeongguk’s wandering eyes as you slide them down your legs.

”But you do remember that I said I wanted to tie you up just so I could subject you to so much cuddling you’d probably die? Right?”

He watches you put a knee on the bed and then crawl toward him.

”I know. And I’m giving you the opportunity to do that, or just… whatever you want,” he smirks happily.

”So,” you start, your hand coming to rest at his sternum while you lean your weight on your other arm, ”your gift to me is… you?”

But your words aren’t very well-thought out, and you see his smile slowly fall and hesitancy color his eyes.

”Uh, no, I—I wasn’t sure what to get you, so I—there’s a present for you in the kitchen too, but this was just—”

”Gguk, I didn’t mean it like that,” you interrupt, his heartbeat strong under your palm. 

”I’d rather have you and get to spend time with you than literally anything else.”

Jeongguk relaxes, and you smile, running your fingers up to trace his collarbones. ”Do you mind if I nap for like half an hour before deciding what to do with you? I couldn’t sleep at the hotel, so I’m absolutely exhausted.”

”Of course, you can do whatever you want,” he assures, confidence visibly creeping back up.

”Good,” you stand from the bed, pretending you don’t notice him staring at your ass as you flick the lights off.

It takes a moment for your eyes to adjust to the darkness and as they do, you climb back into the bed, searching for Jeongguk’s warm body. Your hand touches his stomach, and you trail it down to grasp the duvet and pull it higher over your bodies.

”I missed you,” you whisper, laying your head on Jeongguk’s chest and releasing an exhausted breath. ”It’s so hard to sleep without you these days—oh, you really are naked,” you chuckle when you lower your hand and feel a bit more skin than you expected.

Jeongguk’s only response is to laugh at your discovery as if that wasn’t the whole point.

”I guess it’s only fair that I…” you sit up to pull the t-shirt over your head and chuck it—along with your bra—to the floor.

You pretend like you can’t make out the almost pained expression on your boyfriend’s face when you lie back down again.

”Aren’t you gonna release me?” He asks, bewildered. ”If you’re going to sleep?”

It makes you snicker, ”I don’t know, I think I’m pretty fond of this arrangement.”

You hear Jeongguk sigh in defeat and acceptance, but you still lift your head to look at his face. ”Is it uncomfortable?”

The reassuring smile he wears is sweet when he shakes his head. ”No, it’s fine. Sleep.”

But having your hands suspended at any angle for a longer period of time would make anyone uncomfortable, and so you sit up once more, hands reaching up to release him from the ropes.

”Don’t get too happy; I’m definitely tying you back up later. If you want, of course.”

But the smile on Jeongguk’s face only grows as he shakes the blood back into his fingers, and before you know it, you’re on your back, and he’s turned to the side, leaning over you.

”I thought you were supposed to be sweet, yet here you are, baring your boobs but not letting me touch.”

You chuckle at what’s become a recurring theme, and instinctively, your hands reach for his face.

”Oh, no,” he tuts playfully, leaning all his weight on his elbow and gathering both your wrists in his other hand like he’s become so fond of doing.

”Gguk,” you complain dramatically, ”I wanted to touch.”

”Oh, I know that, but did you ever think about me? I think it’s definitely my turn.”

Being exposed before his eyes isn’t scary, it’s more of a thrill that makes you hold your breath for a second or two. It’s not scary because although Jeongguk is a prime specimen of a man, putting literally everyone else to shame and appearing like he definitely knows it, there’s always that soft, loving hue to his eyes.

Jeongguk meets your gaze, and when he doesn’t find anything but love and happiness—and maybe a bit of a faux pout—he brings your wrists over your head to hold in his other hand.

His free hand mimics your earlier actions, trailing a straight line from the middle of your collar bones, down to your sternum. Then he traces the outer shape of your left breast, where the fat meets your ribcage.

You let him continue with his feather light ministrations, the touch intensifying your tiredness.

”Gguk,” you whine again, ”Let me…”

You see him tear his eyes from your breasts and look at your hands that are making grabbing motions. It makes him laugh.

”You should’ve thought of that before you decided to be weak.”

You pout. ”I know you want to, though. Just imagine… my hands in your hair… on your back…”

You’re too sleepy to start something sexual, you both know that. Despite your eyes being half-closed by now, you’re able to make out the flash of contemplation. It makes you smile happily, and you can’t believe you ever doubted Jeongguk’s need for physical touch. Your physical touch.

In the end, it wins and he lets go of your hands. A heavy sigh, containing only happiness and relief of being with someone you love, slips past your lips the moment he lowers his head enough for you to tangle your hands in his hair.

They work almost on autopilot, the movements of carding through his dark hair so familiar by now, and they only travel down to the top of his shoulders to hug him to you shortly before you lose your consciousness. You’ve never felt so safe, not with your body or mind. And not with your heart either.

Turns out that Jeongguk, except for gifting himself, also prepared to cook dinner, and when you later exchange gifts, he gives you a blue polaroid camera and the sweetest little pendant necklace. He never once forgets Valentine’s.

Speaking of cameras and pictures, not long after, Jeongguk reveals something to you.

You glance at yourself in Jeongguk’s bathroom mirror as you place your toothbrush into the cup and smoothen your hair down.

He turns his head when you step out, smiling at your outfit that consists of one of his large t-shirts and a pair of clean cotton panties. Otherwise, he’s exactly where you left him.

”Your turn,” you reach the bed, crawling on top of it to sit beside him. He’s truly a vision, lying naked and on his back, his softening cock resting on his lower stomach.

Your hand finds his warm chest that’s not heaving anymore. ”Or do you want me to clean you up?”

Jeongguk lifts his large hand to put it over yours. ”No, I’ll do it. Just… in a minute.”

Slowly, his smile falls, and he turns his focus onto the ceiling. ”I… need to tell you something.”

The change in mood, how his voice suddenly sounds both serious and nervous, starts to worry you.

”What is it?” You ask gently.

”You know… in college? When we… slept together?”

You pull your hand from out underneath his to lay it over it instead, your thumb stroking the back of it. ”Yeah?”

”Well, after… when you were asleep, I…”

You watch him gulp.

”I took a picture of you.”

You feel your eyebrows lift slightly as you consider his confession and what it means. You were naked and unconscious, and the way he seems so regretful forces you to wonder what the purpose was. Proof for the bet? That he succeeded in bedding a virgin? But you know he wasn’t with you for the bet anymore by then, so what makes him so nervous?

”I get that you probably think it was creepy, and I’m sorry. I—I was never going to show it to anyone, and I didn’t. It was just… for me. N—not to jerk off over or anything sexual, just as a memory.”

You bite your lip, eyes lingering on your hands. Although his worried words could creep you out, they don’t. You know Jeongguk, even back then, and you trust him. Besides, by how he tends to hate himself over the smallest things he considers mistakes, you don’t want to know how he’d deal with having spread nude and unconscious photos of you.

”Do you still have it?”

At that, he looks at you, seemingly surprised at your soft curiosity.

”Uh, yeah… I do,” he admits, looking away again as if he’d hoped you wouldn’t ask. “I’ll delete it right now if you want.”

”Can I see it?”

Surprised, he nods once, sitting up and reaching for his phone on the nightstand. You see him put his code into the device–a code you already know–and navigate through it.

He’s biting his lip nervously when he hands you the phone, awaiting your reaction.

You’re not exactly sure what you expected the picture to portray. Well, you, of course, judging by his words, but definitely not what you’re faced with.

The photo isn’t crystal clear like the ones Jeongguk’s expensive camera produces. It’s a bit grainy, obviously taken in a low-light setting. And you see yourself. You’re lying on Jeongguk’s chest, and sure, you look to be naked, but the picture is taken from above so all you see is the parts of your upper back that’s not covered by your hair.

The hair also covers some of your face, so it’s not even a hundred percent clear that it’s you. And the best part: Jeongguk. He looks carefree, smiling with his lower face nuzzled into your hair as well, and he looks into the camera with his big, brown eyes. He looks so young, so happy.

“I’ll still delete it if you want,” you hear from beside you.

But you hold the phone to your chest when you look up to meet his eyes. “Can I have it?”

Surprised, Jeongguk only nods, and you turn your attention back on the phone, sending it to your own device.

“You’re not upset?” he asks quietly, “not even a bit?”

“No,” you answer earnestly. “It’s not… you didn’t have bad intentions, and… I find it sweet. Besides, it’s the only picture of us from back then.” 

“Yeah… I just couldn’t delete it. I’ve looked at it so much over the years, probably more than what was good for me, but I just…”

Jeongguk trails off, and you understand him, you really do. You don’t know if you would’ve looked at it if the roles were reversed, but you know you definitely wouldn’t have deleted it either.

“But now we can take all the pictures,” you grin before realizing something that makes your eyes widen.

“What?” Jeongguk questions, but you’re already off the bed, opening the drawer where he keeps some of his camera gear. And your blue polaroid camera.

“Give me your hand,” you ask as you’re starting it up, looking through the viewfinder.

“No, not my hands.”

You lower the camera from your face. He still doesn’t have a thread of clothing on his body, but his hands are what he’s worried about, “Why not?”

“Because they’re not nice?” he states before reaching for the camera. “I can take one of yours if you want?”

Your mouth is left open as you blink at him, and you definitely don’t let him take the camera. “Jeongguk, I’m taking full offense by that. Your hands are so nice. Look.”

His eyes leave yours, and you watch him lower them to take in the sight before him. Your hand holding his, slowly intertwining your fingers. 

“Not only are your hands, like, very masculine and attractive to look at,” you smile cheekily, stroking the back of his hand against your cheek, “but they’re so warm. And they fit so well with mine. Not to brag but I’ve held a lot of hands in my days.”

He raises his eyebrows, making you laugh. “But yours are by far my favorite to hold. And not only do they help when mine aren’t strong enough, but you know exactly how to use them to make me feel better.”

Jeongguk’s smile grows suspiciously wide, and you stop to think about what you said.

“Gguk, I meant when my back hurts.”

“Yeah, but how am I supposed to think about anything else when my hands were touching a lot of other things like ten minutes ago?”

You roll your eyes, “Of course. I guess that just proves my point, doesn’t it? I love you, and your hands, and everything you use them for.”

You position your intertwined hands in the prettiest way you can before putting the camera to your eye once more. This time, he lets you, and a few seconds later, a small square polaroid comes out.

You’ve barely placed the camera and the picture, face down to develop, on the nightstand when Jeongguk pulls you down by your shirt. Landing beside him, you giggle as he pulls you closer.

“You know, I really can’t believe this,” he states, smiling cheekily.

“Believe what?”

“You know, I used to fantasize about you. Even when we were just friendly neighbors, I used to picture you in my clothes.”

The fabric of his white cotton t-shirt stretches as he pulls on it. “I thought about you, wearing them cause you missed me, but I never thought–”

Of course, you know what it is he never thought would happen. You and him being together.

“I like wearing them,” you admit. “Especially like this, when you’ve just worn them, and they’re still warm and smell like you.”

His smile widens, and he looks even more youthful than normally. “You like how I smell?”

“Gguk, I’ve told you already, yes. I love the way you smell. Both when you’re clean and wearing cologne but also when you’re in the middle of working out. It’s gotta be pheromones and biology,” you mumble.

It has to. Because even when he’s sweaty and the cologne’s worn off, Jeongguk smells so… attractive to you.

“Gotta be that monkey brain,” he swears, making you laugh.

“Definitely.”

With your head on your pillow, you close your eyes, but it isn’t long until you feel Jeongguk do something with your hair. For a minute, you let him, until you’re too curious.

“What are you doing?”

“You know what else I fantasized about?”

“Uh… my tits?”

He snorts, and you open your eyes.

“Yes. Always. But something that isn’t your body. Or well, I guess it’s sorta about your body.”

“Hmm, I don’t know?”

“I’ve always wanted to photograph you. Like this, intimate but not necessarily naked and with your hair all over the pillow. In my bed.”

So that’s what he was doing, positioning your hair into what would make a good picture.

“I hope you’ll let me do that someday. No one else has to see them if you don’t want to. Honestly, I’ve got so many ideas for shoots, if you’ll let me.”

You watch his face as he concentrates on a strand of your hair he keeps between his fingers. It brings you endless happiness that despite everything, Jeongguk followed his dreams and became a photographer, and the smile that pulls on your mouth surely reflects that.

“You’re saying I inspire you?”

“Of course. You’re the love of my life.”

You stop breathing. It’s one thing to know that he loves you, that you’re still his first love and possibly his last too, but it’s an entirely different thing to hear it. The love of his life.

He doesn’t look nervous even though you’re pretty much rendered speechless. He just looks happy, warm, brown eyes gazing down at you.

Finally, your words return to you, and you lift your hand to the back of his neck. “And you’re mine. I can’t say I’ll be a good model, but you can try if you want.”

“Doubt that. I think you’ll be perfect.”

Speaking of his profession, you’re reminded of another thing you’re sure you’ve talked about briefly but still want to bring up again, just to make sure.

“Also… I’m sorry for asking you to photograph the wedding.”

It’ll always fill you with guilt, knowing what pain you were inflicting on him, asking him to do that. And just as much, knowing that he would’ve done it without complaints.

“It’s okay,” he assures, and you believe him, that he’s worked through a lot of it. “Have you talked to him recently?”

You don’t need to hear his name to know who Jeongguk means. “Yeah. Around a week ago. I found an old shirt of his, so I asked if he wanted it back. Turned out to be his favorite shirt that he thought he lost years ago, so he said he’ll try to come by and pick it up.”

“Oh,” Jeongguk says, curious instead of saddened or suspicious. “...Do you miss him?”

You lift your hand to trace his jaw with your fingers absentmindedly, “Honestly, I think I do. But it’s… I sometimes miss him, just as a person? Someone who I shared a lot of my life with. A friend. It’s sad what had to happen to us, and I know it was my fault, so I guess… I don’t know. I don’t think about him every day, and I know the good days and moments didn’t outweigh the… bad match.”

“Do you feel guilty?”

“Yeah. But I know it was for his best too.”

Jeongguk plays with the hair behind your ear, looking deeper in thought than a minute ago.

“But you know, it couldn’t be clearer to me? I might miss him sometimes, a gloomy feeling in my chest, but when I think of you, having to part from you… it hurts. I missed you so much after college, and just the thought of not seeing you, I–”

You’re rarely this emotional, but something about the way he looks at you tonight has you choking up.

“Don’t cry,” he soothes, and you take a deep breath to blink the tears away before they escape. “I understand. You’re allowed to miss him, I don’t mind that, and I’m not worried.”

You wrap your arms around his neck, “I hope so dearly that he finds what I have, someone that means to him what you mean to me.”  

Everything’s a blur. Well, not everything but some things are. You and Yuna have been dancing for what feels like hours and hours, until your surroundings were spinning a bit too much and you couldn't anymore.

At the moment, you’ve plopped down on the black leather seat of a booth, Yuna on the other side, and your eyes focus mindlessly on people still on the dance floor. 

You start to feel tired after a while, but you’re not exactly sure how long you’re sitting there. A deep exhale leaves your lips as you rest your head on the table, your hair surely going everywhere.

It’s easy to say that you’re a bit more drunk than you’ve been in a very long time.

A hand starts to rub your shoulder, but you hardly notice until a voice also calls your name. Tiredly, you lift your head, a smile immediately pulling on your lips when you’re faced with your favorite pair of brown eyes.

“Gguk?”

He hums, hands fixing your hair and tucking it behind your ear.

“What… you doing here?” you ask, and to no surprise at all, it comes out… a bit slurred.

“Yuna called me,” he smirks, nodding his head toward your friend who holds her phone to her ear, also looking tired as hell. Maybe a little less than you, though. “Yoongi’s on his way for her.”

“And you came for me?” you can’t help the adoring pout from forming.

Jeongguk laughs, grasping your arm. “Of course. Now, can you walk outside by yourself? I’d carry you but people might think I’m kidnapping you.”

You nod, letting him help you out of the booth, and with his support, you’re able to walk. After hearing Jeongguk greet Yoongi, you turn to wave goodbye to Yuna–you know you’ll be texting in the morning anyway–and allow Jeongguk to lead the way.

He walks slowly, and you hold onto his arm maybe a little too tight. When you catch a whiff of him and are reminded how incredibly good he always smells, you can’t resist leaning your head against his arm too, sneakily sniffing him. 

He’s dressed in a basic black sweater and jeans on the baggier side, and he looks so good. As you follow him through the crowded bar, you close your eyes, imagining… him. 

He’s yours, and he’s perfect, and he’s kind, and he’s lovely.

And he’s hot. Stupidly fucking sexy. 

Before you know it, you’re sitting in the passenger seat of Jeongguk’s car, and he’s leaned over you to fasten your seatbelt. Which you won’t deny is kinda cute of him. But it also leaves you once again enveloped in his masculine scent, and you think your heart might somersault out of your chest.

“There,” he steps back, smiling down at you happily in the most devastating way that makes the corners of his eyes crinkle. God damn him for having such a hold on your heart.

Unknowing of your thoughts, he closes the door and rounds the car to get inside on the driver’s side.

You watch his hands as he starts the engine, and you let out the biggest breath you think you’ve ever taken. Jeongguk glances at you briefly with a curious look.

“I’m so happy I found you again,” you slur, feeling almost like you’re about to cry.

Jeongguk just chuckles, filled with fondness. “Technically, wasn’t it me who found you again?”

“What?”

“Yeah? I approached you, so technically, I found you.”

You narrow your eyes, choosing to look out the window, “Don’t make me take it back.”

Jeongguk’s laughter fills the car, and you feel him grasp your hand. It’s sweet, the way he holds it, and he even brings it to his face to kiss the back of it. 

However, somehow, you dropped your mind and it ended up in the gutter. All you can think of at that moment is his mouth. His lips and his tongue and his teeth. You think back to him between your legs, how he places kiss after kiss just like that one on your legs, higher and higher until he–

You squirm in the car seat, and Jeongguk lowers your still intertwined hands to focus on the road.

Five minutes later, and he pulls up at your shared street. Unsurprisingly, he exits the car and heads over to your side, opening your door while you're still struggling with the seatbelt. It looks like he wants to help you, but it snaps open right before he can. 

Like a real gentleman, Jeongguk offers you his hand and pulls you up and out of the car, closing the door behind you and locking the car. 

“Now…” he starts, and you’d recognize that spark of mischief anywhere, even when you’re plastered.

Your eyes widen when the ground disappears from under your feet, but you’re experienced enough by now to automatically hook your arm around his neck as he carries you bridal style toward the heavy door.

It takes you two tries to enter the code and thirty seconds to even remember it in the first place. Meanwhile, Jeongguk is just waiting patiently. Maybe also quietly chuckling.

He then carries you to the elevator, where you at least manage to press the number six on the first try.

Being carried by him makes your drunk heart melt, but it doesn’t help very much with how you were feeling in the car. Or even the bar.

Because underneath the sweatshirt, you can feel practically every solid muscle in his arms and chest. Completely unashamed, you stare at him through the mirror in the elevator, not even reacting when he raises a brow at you back. 

It’s just everything about him. His fucking hair, framing his face so perfectly, even when it’s still pretty short. And his neck… you turn your head. You’re able to see the faintest outline of that huge fucking vein that really pops out when Jeongguk’s doing strenuous exercise, and you want really really badly to kiss his neck.

Unfortunately, the elevator dings right then, and Jeongguk steps out. You lean your head against him as he walks to his door, and then you sigh when he has to let you down to open the door.

Surely, picking up on it, he wastes no time in picking you back up though when you’re both inside and your shoes are off.

“Time for bed,” he smirks, but doesn’t steer his steps toward the bedroom but the bathroom. “But let's get your makeup off first.”

“Nooo, Gguk, I’m too tired,” you whine, closing your eyes and going limp in his arms to prove your point.

For a second, he stops. Then he turns around and enters the bedroom instead. You keep your eyes closed even as he lays you down on the bed and leaves the room.

It’s quiet and peaceful for a moment. At least a bit, truth be told, your ears still ring a tad from the bar’s loud music.

Then you feel something kinda wet against your cheek.

“What’re you doin?” you ask, struggling a bit to open your eyes.

“I know you’ve said you feel bad if you sleep in your makeup,” he answers warmly, “So I’m removing it.”

It’s your makeup wipes he’s using, you realize. You also note that he’s very careful, wiping the black eyeliner and mascara from your eyes before taking a new wipe and going over the rest of your face. 

If you were sober, you’d gush to yourself about how nice it feels, not only to have Jeongguk’s gentle hands on your face, but to be cared for like that. 

“Okay, I’m done. Now, sit up.”

A bit unwillingly, you flutter your eyes open again. Jeongguk is sitting on the bed beside you, holding your toothbrush out to you in one hand and a cup in the other.

“Or do you want me to brush your teeth too?” he jokes, but once again, if you were sober, you would’ve thought about how he doesn’t look like he’d mind all that much.

With a quiet huff–that grants another chuckle from Jeongguk–you sit up and accept the toothbrush. He sets the cup down on the bedside table before he disappears into the bathroom.

Left alone, you decide to just get the brushing over with, stopping once your mouth is full of foam to spit it out in the cup. Turns out that the task also wakes you up a bit, and when you’re done, you think that you might as well go and put the things back in the bathroom.

You don’t know what you expected because Jeongguk has most likely never in his entire life slept voluntarily in a shirt, but when you enter the bathroom, you’re faced with his naked back.

“You done?”

Your head snaps up, and you meet his eyes through the mirror above the sink. He’s just putting back his own toothbrush and turns to take yours as well, rinsing it and the cup before placing them back.

It’s when you see him (un)dressed for bed, in only a pair of black shorts that you remember that you’re still in your black jeans and intricate top. Fittingly, you also spot the t-shirt he must’ve been wearing under the sweatshirt, laying discarded over the washing machine.

Almost too happily, you grab it, smiling cheekily when Jeongguk notices what you’re doing.

“No, not that one. It’s dirty,” he warns, but you hold it up briefly, and there aren’t any stains on the white fabric.

“No, it’s not,” you bring it to your face to breathe in his scent. It smells just like him and not bad or dirty in any way.

“Give it,” he warns, but you can tell even in your drunken state that he’s not all that serious. And you want it.

“No.”

He tries to swipe it from you, but you hold it to your chest with everything you’ve got. “Gguk, I’m not giving up. It’s mine.”

“Fine,” he sighs in defeat, still smiling in amusement.

When he goes to wash his face, and you’re certain he won’t try to steal it from you again, you pull your top over your head and thereafter unhook your bra. They fall to the floor, and you put Jeongguk’s shirt on. 

Usually pretty good at picking up your stuff, you decide to leave your clothes in a pile on Jeongguk’s bathroom floor, adding your jeans to it after pushing them down your legs.

However Jeongguk, still smiling as he turns around after having dried his face on a towel, doesn’t share your intentions and bends down to pick them up. He places them where he originally put his clothes, and then he approaches the door and you. 

You back up as he comes closer, noticing how his smile smoothly turns into a very attractive smirk. He’s so… so.. attractive. So gorgeous, so stunning.

“Time for bed, okay?”

You peer up at him with wide, innocent eyes. “Carry me?”

He laughs, but closes the distance to pick you up–by your thighs this time–for the nth time only that night. Like always, you wrap your arm around his neck, enjoying the feeling of his warm muscles through your–his–shirt.

He heads for your side of the bed and tries to lay you down again, but you don’t let go of his neck, instead you wrap your other arm around it too.

“Are you gonna let go so I can get in bed too?”

“No.”

“No?” he chuckles. One of your hands ventures just below the back of his neck to feel his shoulder muscles.

“Gguk?”

“Hmm?”

“I need you to rail me.”

He stills, but doesn’t redirect his gaze from your face. You think you hear him let out an amused breath, but you can’t really focus on that because soon after, you feel his hand on your naked thigh.

The touch is light, just his fingers stroking slowly over the skin on your outer thigh.

“I want to do everything you ask of me, believe me,” he smiles down at you. “But not that. Not while you’re drunk.”

“But you’ve fucked me while I was drunk before,” you pout, arms pulling him closer. “And you’re so hot, I want you all over me. And in me. Please, Gguk? I want you.”

“Yeah, when I was drunk too,” he chuckles. “It’s different like this; I’m not gonna do it.”

If you were sober, you would’ve moved on already, but drunk you is not as clear in the head, and she keeps sulking.

“You know what?”

“What?” you ask, entirely mesmerized by Jeongguk’s pretty face.

“If you’re a good girl and go to sleep now, I’ll ‘rail you’ tomorrow.”

“Promise?”

“Sure.”

“Okay then.”

He waits for you to let go of him, but you don’t. 

“Honey, you gotta let go of me so I can sleep too.”

“Can I kiss you at least? Not even with tongue, just a kiss?”

Laughing quietly, Jeongguk nods, and you immediately press your lips against his. But you can’t really stop yourself from also moving your mouth and pressing short kisses to the rest of his face. He laughs but lets you kiss him all you want.

“Best boyfriend ever. And so sweet and kind. Love you so much I think I might die.”

“Don’t die, please. Are you done?” he questions when you loosen your hold on him just enough to look at his face.

“No, never!” But before you can kiss his cheek for the seventh time, Jeongguk ducks under your arms. “What? No,” you whine.

“Hold on,” he chuckles as he rounds the bed, “I’m just getting into bed.”

With half-closed eyes, you watch him get under the duvet only to hold it open for you, and you don’t need more of an invitation than that.

Your head is pounding when you wake up the next morning. The sun shining through the blinds is too bright, and you groan quietly.

Right then, Jeongguk enters the bedroom, holding a tall glass of water in one hand and something small in his other. He gives you an empathic look.

“How are you feeling?”

“Like death,” you reply, trying to look at him properly but it’s too bright. You can at least tell he hasn’t gotten dressed yet, still shirtless and in the shorts he slept in.

“Figured. Here, take this and you’ll hopefully feel better.”

You sit up and reach your hand out to take the painkillers from him. Once you’ve popped them into your mouth, he hands you the glass, and you chase them down with the water.

Placing the half-empty glass on the bedside table, you lie back down with a huff.

“Sleep some more?” Jeongguk assumes, and you nod in response.

“Okay,” he heads back toward the door, “let me know if you need anything. And of course, when you’re feeling better, it seems like I have some railing to do.”

His teasing words have you almost choking on your own saliva, and when you sit up halfway to look at him just as he’s leaving the room, he’s smirking, clearly very entertained.

“You’re a menace!” you call, hearing his laughter. 

With warm cheeks, you bury your face in your pillow.

At around two p.m., you flutter your eyes open, finally feeling better. At least good enough to leave the bed. 

So you do. But you don’t bother getting dressed, instead exiting Jeongguk’s bedroom in just his shirt and your panties. 

The TV sounds through the apartment and you soon find him in the living room, still shirtless and tapping away at his laptop. 

You’ve had some time to… uh, consider your actions from the night before, and you know you’re a single suggestive word from Jeongguk away from blushing.

He looks up at you when you approach, but the smile he gives is more sweet than smug.

“Feeling better?” 

You nod, grabbing a blanket from the armrest because it is a little bit chilly in your current outfit. It makes you miss the warmth of his bed.

He places the laptop beside him on the couch, and you take the opportunity to climb onto his lap with the blanket hanging from your shoulders and cuddling up to him.

“You’re so warm,” you groan, leaning your head against his neck and placing your hands against his chest.

Jeongguk rubs your back soothingly and you can hear his chuckle.

“By the way, I’m sorry for yesterday. For being annoying and, uh, coming onto you like that.”

“Oh, absolutely don’t worry about that. If anything it was cute and quite entertaining. Kinda also pretty good for my confidence. I’m sorry for teasing you about it.”

You straighten up on his lap, now able to look him in the eyes. “Gguk, don’t apologize. You know that I think you’re funny? And that I think it’s even funnier when you think you’re funny. Besides, you were a lot more teasing in college and it didn’t exactly stop me from falling head first for you.”

He pulls you closer, gazing up at you lovingly. “And if your confidence wasn’t great before last night, I’m sure it’s perfectly fine now with the way I was stroking your ego,” you huff.

At least Jeongguk took your words to heart, because what he says next makes you gasp.

“It wasn’t the only thing you wanted to stroke last night.”

“Jeongguk, oh my God!”

As soon as you’re able to pick your jaw off the ground, you lower your hands to Jeongguk’s naked sides to tickle him. He laughs, more so because of your reaction than your tickling, but you don’t care.

Eventually, you stop, trailing your hands back up his chest and to his face as you’re both catching your breaths. “I love you, Gguk. Just the way you are, without any filters.”

“I’ll make you regret saying that,” he jokes.

“Doubt it,” you smile happily before taking on a cheekier tone, “Also…”

Eyebrows raised, Jeongguk hums questioningly.

“…I think you have some railing to do.”

He blinks a few times before his lips form a smirk, “Oh? Well, your wish is my command.”

And with one hand on your back, he manages to somehow lay you down on your back on the couch and lean over you, looking like a literal dream with his slightly messy black hair and teasing eyes. You’re so happy, and your cheeks hurt from smiling.

“I mean, only if you want to.”

“Honey, you do know that all you’re wearing is panties and my shirt, right? I couldn’t resist you even if I wanted to.”

The seasons change, and soon, winter melts away.

When summer arrives–your first as a couple–it’s only natural that you tag along to Jin and Mina’s vacation house. By now, Jeongguk is much more relaxed around you and his friends, to the point where they aren’t as scared to tease him anymore. For a long while, they walked on eggshells around him. Well, sometimes they still do, at least when it comes to certain topics, but not as much.

“So what would you pick for me, then? There are two that people usually pick for me, can you guess them?”

You concentrate on Tae’s face where he sits on the other side of the wooden outdoor table. He keeps a neutral face, skin sun-kissed and black hair slightly bleached.

“I have no idea. Penguin?”

“Penguin?!”

“Yeah?” you shrug, “Is that so weird?”

“Yes? People usually say tiger or bear.”

“Oh. Well, I can sorta see it, but I wouldn’t say it was very clear. Not like…

“Jeongguk.”

“Jeongguk. Okay, I can agree on that one,” Taehyung says, observing the man sitting beside you.

“Yeah, I don’t usually go around, liking people to animals, you know, but I’ve never seen anyone resemble a deer so much.”

Taehyung’s eyes widen, “A deer?! Are you crazy, woman?”

You look at him questioningly before turning to your boyfriend, inspecting his face like you don’t spend most of your waking time gazing lovingly at him. 

“...Kangaroo?”

“Okay, you’re mental. You’re supposed to know him better than anyone, but you can’t even tell that he’s a bunny?”

“A bunny?”

Your face is colored by confusion as Taehyung rises from his seat. “Yes.”

“I don’t know. I mean… it’s the Bambi eyes for me. So either a deer or a kangaroo. Kangaroos are basically just jacked up deer that are able to walk–hop–upright. Boxing and all that too.”

“I get your point,” he hums, grabbing your boyfriend by the hair. Jeongguk, who was reading something on his phone, lets him but narrows his eyes.

“What are you doing?” you ask, watching him attempt to start a fire with Jeongguk’s hair between his hands. 

Taehyung steps back, smiling proudly when one side of Jeongguk’s hair stands upright, like a… cone? Quickly, he nods to himself and repeats the process on the other half.

“Look at this. Ggukkie, do the thing.”

“No.”

“Yes, do the thing.”

“Fine,” Jeongguk sighs, looking at you and scrunching his nose. Even his front teeth peek out, and it’s absolutely the cutest thing you’ve ever seen. 

“Oh god,” you gasp. “Tae, you’re right.” Naturally, your hands fly to Jeongguk’s face, holding it in your hands with wonder in your eyes. “You are so cute. My bunny.”

Slightly more accepting of your shenanigans than Tae’s, Jeongguk lets you squish his cheeks and kiss his pouty lips.

“Love you too, bye.”

After ending the call to your mother, you lock your phone and place it into your pocket. You hadn’t talked to her in a week, so she had lots to say. About thirty minutes of it, actually.

When you return to Taehyung and Jeongguk, Jin and Jimin have joined as well, talking amongst themselves. As you near the table, you let yourself take in the sight of your boyfriend’s back. He’s wearing a black t-shirt with his black shorts, and you particularly like… well, his back. 

Reaching him, you drape yourself over him from behind.

“Hi,” you greet quietly, not wanting to interrupt whatever they were talking about, and you place your hand and the apple you’d retrieved from the house in front of his face.

Jeongguk holds your hand still as he takes a bite, mumbling something to Jimin soon after.

You’re in the middle of very discretely sniffing Jeongguk’s hair when a call of your name grabs your attention. Turning your head, you find Jin looking at you, and soon enough, the rest of the guys too.

“Was there a certain time when you realized you loved Jeongguk? Like, do you know the exact moment you fell in love?”

“Yeah,” you answer casually, taking a bite of the red apple.

“Really? When?” Jin wonders, and you feel a surprised and curious Jeongguk try to turn his head in order to look at you.

Unable to see your boyfriend’s face, you ask him, “You remember when we used to study in the library?”

“Yes?” 

“That one time when you first complimented my nails?”

“Yeah…”

“You also warmed my hands in yours, and I knew then.”

“What?” he breathes, “But that was… It was…”

“Early on?” you continue for him, “Yeah, but you were so sweet to me. And funny. I felt like I got to know you so quickly, and you really brightened my mornings. I just really enjoyed being around you, so honestly, I was down bad before it even started.”

“He’s crying!” Jin laughs, clapping his hands together.

Jeongguk huffs, doing something with his hands you can only guess is drying his tears. “No, I’m not!”

“Told you, you owe me twenty!”

You gasp, “You guys are mean, betting on who can make him cry,” you scold, hugging Jeongguk to your body and rubbing his arm.

“We didn’t. We were just talking about the fact that he’s not as big of a crybaby anymore. He only really cries for one person.”

“Yeah,” Jimin adds, “It’s kinda cute, actually. He’s all tough now, but anything remotely sentimental from or about you, and he’s weeping.”

“Dude, why didn’t I pick her as my target? She’s so sweet–I want someone to be sweet to me, too,” Taehyung complains, making you roll your eyes. If you know one thing, it’s that he does not have the hots for you in any way.

“Why does everyone think I’ll love just anyone?” you question.

“Because you do?” Taehyung replies, one brow raised. “You literally just said that you loved Jeongguk after, like, two weeks.”

“It was more than two weeks. Besides, I’d already had my eyes on him for quite some time.”

“Oh?” Jin voices, curiously leaning in. 

You also think you hear Jeongguk utter a surprised ‘what?’ as he tries to look back up at you again, this time more successful, and you meet his wide eyes.

“I meant, like, appreciating you from afar. In a totally non-creepy way. Everyone knew who all of you were, and I just thought you were handsome.”

“Why didn’t you talk to me?” he asks, sounding almost distraught.

“Cause I knew you wouldn’t have spared me a second look,” you smile, “We were in totally different leagues.”

“Definitely not true, you’re actually a lot prettier than him,” Jin assures, making you laugh.

“I just knew nothing would come of it. We were in different social circles, and I knew you were into more… casual things. I wasn’t, so it wouldn’t have worked out. Besides, for a period of time, I had a boyfriend.”

“Oh, yeah. Asshole,” Jeongguk grumbles.

He continues to complain, and you smile as you hug him tightly.

“I mean, I get why you didn’t talk to me cause I was an ass too, but I still think you should’ve.”

You just chuckle and kiss his cheek.

You’re really, really fond of Jin and Mina’s vacation house. It’s been three days out of seven, and so far, you’ve had a blast.

On the third day, you all squeeze into two cars with the beach as your destination, and the boys are incredibly excited. Remembering when you first met Jeongguk again and he told you that they only play soccer ‘on the beach, during the summer,’ it’s clear that this is what he meant.

You’re not exactly a soccer talent, yourself, so you settle for lying down on your towel with Mina and Ryujin to soak up the sun. 

Unpacking the towel and the book you’re currently reading, the bottle of sunscreen also tumbles out of your bag. You’ve already applied a layer, but as you peer over to the big bag of stuff that the guys brought, you see them excitedly unpack a ball and, while tackling each other over it, run toward the goal posts sticking out of the sand in what could be considered quite a sad excuse for a soccer field. Not that they seem to mind.

“Gguk,” you call, “sunscreen, please.”

“Yes, in a minute,” he calls back, and you see Jimin hit his shoulder softly, most likely teasing him.

“Now, please.”

Defeated, he says something to the rest, probably to continue dividing themselves into teams, before he jogs up to you.

He’s smiling when he reaches you, “Hey.”

“Hey,” you reply, taking in the sight of your incredibly hunky boyfriend. He’s wearing black swimming trunks, matching his dark tattoos and even darker hair. It’s been maybe four months since he cut it last, meaning that it’s at his preferred length, almost obscuring his vision. You, yourself, haven’t been able to make up your mind. Every time he switches the style of his hair up, you think you fall in love all over again. 

Not only that, but two months ago, he surprised you with a lip piercing. The silver ring glimmers in the sun where it sits snug around his bottom lip, and it moves when he talks. 

Sometimes, or honestly, more than he probably should, he plays with it. You try to remind him not to bite at it to spare his teeth and the not fully healed piercing, but he forgets. And, he looks insanely hot, concentrating on something and biting his lip.

“You have to take care of yourself, okay? For me at least?”

“Yeah, sorry, it’s just that I’m so excited.”

You grin, incredibly endeared, and open the bottle. 

“Oh, I can do it, you don’t have to. I’m a grown man, after all.”

You ignore his smirk, squirting some into your hand before offering him the bottle. “I can help do your back?”

He only nods at that, turning his back to you. But as soon as you lay your eyes on his wide back, you realize you might’ve overestimated yourself. How could you just slather some sunscreen on him when he’s so… tan, and when you put your sunscreen-free hand on him, he’s so… warm…

You’re only human, and you do end up breaking and wrapping your arms around his waist instead. Only wearing a bikini, he’s so warm and firm against your skin, and Jeongguk, who’s started applying the white cream to his arms, only chuckles at your dreamy sigh.

“I love you,” you mumble earnestly with your cheek pressed against his back.

“I… know?”

His slight hesitancy makes you snort, and he tries to look at you from over his shoulder. You tighten your arms around his waist.

“What am I supposed to say when I’m not allowed to say it back?”

“I don’t know, and you are allowed to say it back, but you have to agree that it relieves a lot of pressure to not be expected to, right? I know that you love me, and you know that I love you, and it shouldn’t be expected as a response. You say it because you want to, when you want to.”

“No, you’re definitely right. It’s just that you say it so much that I never get the chance to? I wanna have a nice moment and tell you that I love you, but you always beat me to it. In fact, not only do you grab the nice moments, but you hoard all the moments.”

“Well, that sounds like a you problem. You gotta improve your game,” you shrug. “Get good, you know?”

“I’ll remember that,” he threatens vaguely while chuckling. “Also, weren’t you supposed to sunscreen my back? I’ll need to get back before Jin starts to scream.”

“Yes, but what if you just stay here with me? We can lie on my towel and… hug.”

“Scandalous,” Jeongguk laughs, hoisting your arms higher on his abdomen to spread sunscreen in their previous place.

“Hey! Need him back!” someone calls, and you huff, reluctantly letting go and straightening up.

“Sorry, Jin, a minute!” you inform, finally running your sunscreen-filled hand over Jeongguk’s back. You have to make a conscious effort to not start massaging the spots you know are usually sore, because you feel like his friends won’t ever invite you again if you’re only going to hold your boyfriend hostage.

To make it even harder for you, Jeongguk groans and shifts to give you better access. You don’t even think he does it consciously, just by habit. After all, massaging him after the gym really is a cherished routine.

Soon enough, you pat him on the back, a signal that you’re done, and he turns to give you a small kiss as thanks, also mumbling an ‘I love you’ before he leaves. 

You smile to yourself as you watch him jog to the others, unknowing of the thick layer of sunscreen on his right shoulder and how, hopefully, it’s gonna leave him with tan lines in the shape of a heart.

Karma definitely catches up to you soon enough, though. 

You’re lying on your towel, eyes closed and the book having been abandoned on your bag next to you, when the sun clouds over. You crease your forehead. The forecast didn’t say anything about clouds, and there certainly weren’t any in the sky like… thirty seconds ago.

So you open your eyes.

“Hi,” a smirking Jeongguk greets, standing over you and blocking the sun. “We’re taking a break,” he informs, and behind him, you see Taehyung talking on the phone to someone.

“Oh?” you rise to your elbows, looking up at him. He’s grinning and visibly affected by exercise, his chest still moving rapidly.

“Yeah. So, I thought I’d take you up on that offer of yours.”

“My offer? You mean hugging?” you chuckle, sitting up.

He sets his knees on your towel, reaching for your water bottle, “Yes.”

You watch fondly as he gulps down the water, one drop escaping his mouth to trickle down his neck and onto his chest.

“You know, this is really great. Seeing you have so much fun.”

He moves the bottle from his lips, wiping his mouth with his forearm. “Yeah, this is like the best part of the year. And with you here too? Why are you looking at me like that for?”

“I just think you’re very sweet and handsome. Like, incredibly so.”

“Are you saying you have a crush on me?” he jokes, placing the bottle back beside your bag.

“Yes. The biggest, fattest crush that’s ever crushed. But it seems I’m not the only one.”

“Huh?”

“Three o’clock. The row of women conveniently turned right about this way?”

Discreetly, at least enough, he turns his head. “Oh.”

You snicker at his reaction, wondering if he just hadn’t even noticed the audience as him and his hot friends showed off their athleticism. 

“Hmm. Are you… jealous?” he asks, peering down at you with nothing but trouble in his eyes. 

“No.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. I know that you're mine. And why would I deny them the pleasure of watching you? If anything, I wanna show my incredibly talented and hot and sweet boyfriend off.”

“Possessive? I like it.”

“That’s what you gathered?” you ask, tilting your head and watching as he gets on all fours and slowly closes the distance. “What are you up to?”

“Just making sure they know,” he says, his face mere inches from yours. “I mean if anyone was wondering.”

He’s smiling happily right up until the moment he touches his lips to yours. It’s still a bit of an odd feeling, the warm metal against your mouth, but you definitely don’t mind. He knows that too, that you’re only ever supportive of how he chooses to express himself. 

“There are kids here,” you mumble smilingly against his mouth, and he pulls away.

“I know,” he pouts, “but we can still hug.”

“Gguk!” you hear Jimin call, and you chuckle at how Jeongguk shuts his eyes in disappointment.

“Go,” you assure quietly, “have fun. You and I have all the time in the world.”

It’s four p.m. when Jin steps on something hard in the sand and hurts his foot enough not to want to continue and instead limps dramatically to the little kiosk and its ice cream line. With the majority of your focus on your phone, you note how Taehyung and Jimin plop down on their towels next to Ryujin.

“Play with me.”

Once again, Jeongguk stands before you, happiness and mischief oozing from him.

“Soccer?” you question with your eyebrows raised in surprise. 

Jeongguk nods enthusiastically.

“Gguk, I’ll die.”

Although you wholeheartedly enjoy seeing him do physical activities from a few feet away, men in general, and not least your boyfriend, tend to be… intense. You know that he would never intentionally hurt you, but war flashbacks still fill your mind of your junior high class playing soccer and the guys being so set on winning that they neither realized nor cared that they knocked (smaller) people over.

“Oh, come on,” he pleads, “It’s just you and me, and you know I’d never let you get hurt.”

With no further arguing from your side, you’re gently pulled up off the towel and onto the small soccer field.

“Try to score,” Jeongguk instructs, and it’s only then, when he places the ball in front of your feet that you realize what he’s planning. Smirking, he walks backward until he reaches the old and worn goalposts, void of anything resembling a net.

“I’ll break my toes off?”

He chuckles at your bad excuse and gets into position, “The ball is soft. Just make sure to score.”

It’s the way evil flickers in his eyes and pulls on his lips that has you suspecting foul play. That look is seldom good.

“You can’t chase me if I don’t,” you warn because hunting you down while you squeal in horror has proved to be one of his favorite things to do. 

Jeongguk shrugs, which only confirms it for you, and you point at him. “You’re gonna chase me, aren’t you?”

“Then make sure to score,” he teases.

“So you admit it?”

He smiles, “No. Now, just do it.”

Sighing, you eye the ball and your boyfriend, who’s gotten into the typical goalie stance with his knees bent, feet apart, and his hands out. In response, your adrenaline spikes. 

It’s not that you’re scared of Jeongguk because he’s truly the sweetest man, especially to you, and you know he’d probably never forgive himself if he ever hurt you, but being chased is just… terrifying. It’s fun, you won’t lie, but it’s terrifying.

The ball lies approximately thirty feet from the goal, and you know that, especially in sand, you’ll never be able to outrun someone as fast and athletic as Jeongguk, even with a thirty feet head start.

Additionally, even though there’s a zero percent chance of you scoring against him, you’re a hundred percent he’ll chase you even if you do.

Still, and much to Jeongguk’s amusement, you start to back up slowly, your eyes on the ball. Step after step, you back up, until you see both his and hear his friends’ confusion. Surely, you don’t need that much space to reach an appropriate speed?

But you know you were doomed to fail from the start, so why even try? Instead of running up to the ball, you turn, and you dash in the opposite direction, running for your life and satisfied with your maximized head start.

In the distance, you hear Jeongguk shout a confused “What the…” but also the sound of his feet hitting the sand as he sprints to catch you.

Luckily, you spot Jin, still at the kiosk but now with half an ice cream cone in his hand, and you pray that you’ll be able to reach him before Jeongguk catches up. Jin probably doesn’t care too much about protecting you, but if there’s anything he won’t decline, it’s a good brawl with Jeongguk.

“Jin! Help!” you squeal as you reach him, barely having time to round his body and put him between you and Jeongguk before your boyfriend reaches you. “I’ll buy you two new ice creams!”

Jin licks his ice cream casually but doesn’t mind you holding onto him as a human shield. “Why would I get involved in your little lovers’ quabbel?”

“He said you were getting too old to play soccer,” you lie from behind his back. 

“What the fuck?” Jin exclaims, and from what you can see of Jeongguk as you peer around Jin, his eyes widen comically.

“I did not.”

“You little fucker, you think you’re gonna be young forever or what?” Jin scolds as he pushes the remainder of his ice cream into his mouth, which is honestly quite impressive.

As the guys start to push at each other–Jeongguk to get to you and Jin to protect you only to spite Jeongguk–you back up, happy with your plan. 

Unfortunately, Jin doesn’t spend a ridiculous amount of hours at the gym like Jeongguk, and it’s only a matter of time before he’s sidestepped. But not after they tumble around on the ground for a moment, sand flying everywhere.

As soon as he sees that he’s been overcome, Jin gives up and calls ‘good luck’ at you. Similarly, the moment his friend is no longer an obstacle, Jeongguk sets his eyes on you.

“Oh, you little… I’m coming for you,” he threatens, and you turn to dash away again, but of course, with only a few rapid steps, he’s caught up, and you’re lifted off the ground.

He laughs at your screams, immediately carrying you toward a specific destination. “How about you and I go for a little swim, huh?”

“No,” you whine, but you’ve stopped struggling, “The water’s cold.”

“You haven’t even felt the water,” he chuckles, “It’s surprisingly warm.”

“You’re a menace,” you groan as he continues into the water.

“And you’re a cheating liar.”

“Touché.”

Since he’s holding you bridal style, the water reaches your butt first, and you have to agree that it’s definitely not as cold as you thought. Additionally, Jeongguk is very slow and gentle as he walks farther out.

He continues until only his head is above the surface, meaning you wouldn’t reach the bottom if you tried. So far out, you shift in his arms, holding onto his neck and wrapping your legs around his waist.

“You’re very clingy,” he teases.

“You don’t get to complain since you were the one who dragged me out here. I just don’t like open water where just about anything could take me.”

“This isn’t open water, though. It’s a few feet into the water on a public beach,” he explains gently. “There’s nothing here that could ‘take you.’ Except me, but it’s a bit risky in public, don’t you think?”

“Jeongguk!’ you gasp before your amused smile turns fond, “You know you’re a little bit of an idiot?”

“But I got you.”

You sigh in defeat, “I know.”

For a moment, you don’t say anything, and the only sound is the waves rippling softly around you.

“Do you want me to take you back?” he asks quietly.

Meeting his eyes, you spot the tiniest bit of a certain emotion flash. It really is rarer and rarer these days, but you’d recognize it anywhere.

“No,” you assure softly, running your hand over his shoulder. He rubs one of his along your back. “As long as you hold me like this.”

“Okay.”

You smile, pulling yourself even closer to his body, to the point where you’re cheek to cheek.

“I’m… really happy,” you say so quietly no one else would hear even if you weren’t alone, far from the closest beach goer. “Life was really boring without you.”

You still call them date nights even though you’re living together and have been a couple for almost four years. They happen with varying frequency, sometimes you settle for movie nights every other day for two weeks straight, and other times, you splurge and go out to dinner multiple times a week. 

Tonight, Jeongguk surprised you with a fancier dinner at home, a thing he’s done now and again. You’re always smiling from ear to ear whenever you get to spend time with him, and it’s certainly no different when he’s cooked and set the table with candles.

“So, he wants you to do an extra shoot then?” you ask, taking another bite from your fork.

“Yeah. Said he’d be in touch soon to book,” Jeongguk answers from the sink where he’s opening another bottle of wine. He’s wearing a dark blue dress shirt, tucked into black slacks, the sleeves rolled up and a few buttons undone. He never stops to take your breath away.

“That’s great, Gguk.”

“Mhm. You want some?” he comes to stand beside you, holding the bottle over your nearly empty glass.

“Sure.”

You watch the red liquid be poured into the glass, and then as Jeongguk places the bottle on the table.

“Hey, I wanted to ask you something,” he says.

You swallow the food in your mouth, about to reach for the glass, “Sure, go ahead.”

“Will you marry me?”

You stop breathing. When you turn your head, Jeongguk is sinking to one knee and opening a small, black box you didn’t know he was holding.

At first, you’re speechless. Marriage is one thing you haven’t talked very much about, especially after becoming what you’d call ‘stable.’ You just always assumed he didn’t want to, that the thought only brought him anxiety, and as long as you got him, it didn’t matter to you.

“Gguk, you know I love you–”

“–But?” he continues nervously, “...Don’t tell me you were gonna break up with me? Cause that would be awkward.”

It’s the sad and heartbreaking chuckle he lets out that snaps you out of it. “No, no, of course not! I love you, and I want nothing more than this and you, but we don’t need the rings and the documents for that, you know? You don’t have to do that for me, okay?”

“But I want to. I really do,” he assures, his confidence returning slowly but surely.

“Are you sure?”

“Incredibly. So… will you?”

Your eyes fall from his to the velvet box in his hand. “Oh, love. Of course.”

With his smile growing, he takes the ring out and with his other hand, grasps yours to slide it onto your ring finger.

Maybe surprisingly, or maybe not, the only tear in the room trickles down your cheek.

“So, we’re getting married?” he asks, sounding happy yet in disbelief.

“Yeah. I mean, you proposed, didn’t you?”

“And you said ‘yes?’”

“Then… yeah?”

Overcome with joy and love, you surprise him by throwing yourself at him, and he laughs as he falls to his butt, his hand shooting out to hold your back protectively. You end up on his lap with your forehead against his when you remember that you didn’t even stop to look at the ring.

“This is lovely,” you gasp, admiring the thin, silver band adorned with a small, pale blue teardrop in the middle.

“You like it?”

“Of course, I–I couldn’t have picked out anything better, myself. It’s like… like a little…”

“Forget-me-not?” he finishes for you.

“Yes. I love it. But, Gguk… it must’ve cost a fortune, please tell me it didn’t?”

He grins, “It didn’t.”

You narrow your eyes at him, “Are you lying?”

“No. It didn’t cost much, cause… well, I made it.”

“What?”

“Yeah. I mean, I had to pay for the material, of course, and I paid my uncle to help me, not because he required it, but because I wanted to.”

The blue stone glimmers under your gaze. Sure, you knew Jeongguk was handy, even having been taught some carpentry by his uncle when he was younger, but this?

“Jeongguk, you made this?”

“Yes?”

“For me?”

He strokes your back fondly, “Yeah.”

“Wow,” you gush dreamily, admiring it from every angle. “I don’t even know what to say.”

“You appear very happy for someone who said marriage wasn’t important,” he teases, and you look down at him with all the love you hold for him.

“I wouldn’t have minded if we didn’t, but I love it now that it’s happening. And I love you, that you did all this,” you hold your hand up, “and that you want to be with me like I want to be with you.”

It’s a regular day in November when Jeongguk unlocks the door to the apartment and kicks off his shoes before he trudges into the kitchen with the package under his arm.

He remembers how you, this morning, said you’d meet up with Yuna after a meeting at work, so the dark apartment is no surprise. The package is, however, since he can’t recall ordering anything that would be arriving today.

Jeongguk turns the lights on and places the brown package on the kitchen table to look for a knife. With one in his hand, he slices the packaging tape off and opens it. 

Turning it over, it appears to be… a book?

If he hadn’t already double checked that it was addressed to him and not you, he definitely would’ve. There’s a simple sketch of a swallow on the cover, but as he reads the title, it doesn’t appear to be about birds, at least not non-fictional.

‘The little bird and its love poems’

The author isn’t anyone he recognizes, not that he’s very up to date on them anyway. Curious, he opens it to the first page.

‘To my J, who can make even a writer lose their words.’

His head spins as he pulls out a chair and sits down at the kitchen table. 

It’s six p.m. when you reach what was once only Jeongguk’s apartment complex and take the elevator up to the sixth floor. Since selling your home a while ago, you really haven’t looked back. You barely spent time there anyway.

The second you unlock and open the door, you hear rustling, and another two seconds later, he stands there, red-eyed and sniffling. 

“D–did you? You..?”

Lowering your gaze, you see him holding your book to his chest. “Didn’t think it would arrive today,” you smile as you take off your shoes and jacket, putting them away slowly without looking away from him for too long. “But yeah.”

He just stands there, his pierced bottom lip trembling, and you approach him with open arms. But before you can embrace him fully, he wraps one arm around your waist and lifts.

Without a word, Jeongguk carries you into the bedroom and drops you onto the unmade bed to pull the covers over the both of you as he lies down.

You’re still smiling, even wider when he pulls you closer. 

“I love you,” you whisper into the darkness where it’ll get hard to breathe soon.

“Thanks, I got that,” Jeongguk mumbles sarcastically, sounding all choked up, and it makes you chuckle. 

“How much did you read?”

“All of it.”

“Which was your favorite?” you ask, stroking his hair.

“The last one, I think. ‘The adventure.’ Fucking ruined me.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment.”

“Yeah,” he sniffles, his voice quiet. “…Why didn’t you use your real name?”

You open the duvet to let in some fresh air. “I guess I just wanted to write it. For me, to get it out of my system, and for you, as a gift. I don’t need anyone else, like our friends or all of your followers, to know my thoughts and feelings so deeply. Just you, and this way, it’s just between you and me, but it’s also out there.”

Jeongguk sniffles again, “I like that. Thank you. It must’ve taken you so long, though?”

“Yeah, I guess. I started not very long after we got back together the last time. I’ve always wanted to write something, but I didn’t know what, and I just had all these feelings clogging my brain, and I realized that if I didn’t start with this, those uncontained feelings would color everything I tried to write.”

He rests his head on your chest, “You know, I never thought anyone would write poems for me?”

“I know. But I did.”

“I’m warning you, I’ll be working on a revenge plan.”

Turns out that even if sales weren’t extremely important to you, your collection of poems accidentally gathers the attention of a well-known book circle and ends up doing quite well.

It’s a little less than two years later when you meet your own eyes through the mirror. It’s been hard, but you’ve fortunately managed to keep any tears at bay so far, and you admire your make up along with your dress. 

Satisfied, you run your hands along your waist over what you’ve sewed yourself. This time, the dress is everything you could’ve ever dreamt of.

“You’re really happy, aren’t you?” Yeji speaks from the rattan chair in the corner of the room.

“Yeah,” you sigh happily, “I know you’ve been through this too, but I just can’t wait for it to start, you know? The rest of our lives together.”

“I know.”

Sitting on the make-up table, Yuna takes a sip of her champagne, “I think he’s probably freaking out a lot more than you are,” she chuckles.

You smile, endeared, as you’re picturing him getting ready, probably pacing the room nervously. “He’s sweet.”

It took almost a year to plan your early November wedding. It’s smaller than Yuna’s, mostly family on your side and more friends on Jeongguk’s. You both quickly agreed to do your vows in private, and although he didn’t say it, you think it’s partly because Jeongguk wouldn’t make it through hearing yours in front of everyone.

Despite there definitely not being a reason to be nervous, you find yourself picking at your bouquet as you wait behind the doors, ready to walk down the aisle. Your father dabs his eyes with a napkin discreetly before he offers you his arm.

Then, the music starts, and the doors open.

When you first spot him, he’s standing with his back toward you, but only half a second later, he’s turning around. He’s wearing a traditional black suit with a bow tie, his slightly wavy hair of medium length–at least considering what he’s used to–brushed away from his face, and he looks like he just stepped out of a fairy tale. Your fairy tale.

The feeling must be mutual because he stares at you, those wide, Bambi eyes immediately glossing over. In response, you smile comfortingly at him.

Of course, it doesn’t work, and as you near, his tears finally spill over. There’s a collective awe sounding through the room, fond whispers echoing, and when you reach him–and your dad gives you away–you’re not sure if Jeongguk can see anything with how teary his eyes are. 

Behind him, you hear his groomsmen chuckle, but you know it’s out of love and adoration.

“Hi,” you greet quietly, taking Jeongguk’s arm.

“H–hi,” he stutters, his breaths uneven.

Although the officiant is waiting for your attention, you instead wrap your arms carefully around Jeongguk’s neck.

“Hey, shh, It’s okay,” you soothe, “Imagine it’s just you and me.”

“Is that supposed to help?” he hiccups, and you think it’s Jimin who laughs. It’s been a long time, probably more than a year since you’ve seen Jeongguk shed a tear at all, but you guess they were right back then, his friends. The only person he cries over is you.

“Yes. Close your eyes,” you instruct, lowering your hand to rub it across his back slowly, “and take a deep breath.”

Jeongguk ends up needing a few of those deep breaths before his breathing is under control and you can turn your attention back to the officiant, who smiles fondly at the two of you. 

Jeongguk manages to keep himself collected for the rest of the ceremony, and even if one tear escapes during the first dance, you’re quick to dry it. You can’t blame him, though, not when there’s only you and him on the dance floor and your cousin Jihyo starts to sing.

Wise men say

Only fools rush in…

“This was a good decision. Marriage, I mean,” he nods, and you lift your head from his chest to look at him, “Even though this song makes me wanna bawl all over again. I never would’ve guessed marriage was my thing–fuck, I didn’t think anyone would ever actually love me, much less want to marry me–but here we are,” he chuckles, ignoring the sad look you give him. “But there’s a… stability in it that I like. So thank you, for giving me a chance. Or like, five hundred. ”

“Yeah. It’s not as easy for you to run away now,” you joke gently. 

However, despite Jeongguk’s progress, he looks away briefly. “I’m sorry. For all the things I put you through. I really am, and I’ll be fo–”

“–For the rest of your life. I know. But look at me?”

“You’re the prettiest I’ve ever seen, yeah.”

You laugh quietly, “No, that wasn’t what I meant. I meant that in a ‘look at me, I’ve got everything I could’ve ever asked for’ way. And you know my deepest, darkest desire?”

“Yeah?”

“I think this is pretty darn close.”

Take my hand

Take my whole life, too

For I can't help falling in love with you

It’s later during the reception that Jeongguk can’t find you. How hard could it be, finding the most stunning woman ever, also happening to be the one in the white dress, he thinks, but evidently, you’re gone. He looks through the venue, but doesn’t find you dancing with anyone on the dance floor nor talking with someone in a corner.

It’s only when he walks past a window that he spots that white dress. He stops.

The venue you chose lies on top of a hill, overlooking a river. Down where the water meets land, there’s the smallest of piers. And that’s where you stand.

Jeongguk continues to the exit, opening the doors to stand outside. It’s dark, outside candles lining and illuminating the gravel path down to the pier.

Surely, a lot of people would consider it weird to invite your ex-fiancé to your wedding, but he truly didn’t mind sending Namjoon an invite. Neither does he mind that it’s your ex you’ve snuck off to talk to on your wedding day. 

He doesn’t plan on approaching you, just to wait for you. Even from a distance, it’s mind blowing how you take his breath away. 

He almost feels the need to pinch himself because how did everything he ever wanted come true? You’re speaking with the man you were going to marry, but the gorgeous white dress you’re wearing isn’t for Namjoon, it’s for him. He’s the one with the matching wedding band on his finger. Him. You’ve actually married him. 

For a second, he’s scared that he dreamt it all, that it’s someone else’s wedding he’s at, and he nearly pats his sides in search of the camera bag hanging from his shoulder.

“Oh? Hi, have you seen–”

He turns, relieved to be back in reality. The person speaking to him–who also just noticed the two of you down at the pier–is Namjoon’s girlfriend.

Returning his attention to you, he’s just in time to watch you nearly throw yourself into Namjoon’s awaiting arms.

“Does that… worry you?” she asks quietly, but Jeongguk only shakes his head.

“No. Are you? Worried?”

“Strangely enough… no.”

He doesn’t talk to the woman much more after that, and soon enough, you and Namjoon come walking back. You look happy as you tell him something, holding onto his hand so as to not trip in your heels, and he’s smiling down at you too.

But the moment you look up and notice Jeongguk, your expression changes. He can tell that you were happy for Namjoon, excited that he’s found someone he really likes, and that things have worked out for him. You’re smiling happily for him because you still care for him.

But when you meet Jeongguk’s eyes, it’s different. There’s an indescribable excitement brimming in your beautiful eyes, a longing in your smile that he shares and that’s come true. 

Three weeks after the wedding, you step out of Jeongguk’s car–well it’s yours too since you decided that having two was redundant and yours was sold. He’s quick to round it, immediately reaching for your hand and pulling you into his side so quickly you almost bounce off him. Of course, he catches you, reveling in your laughter. 

Under the sign declaring the little shop a tattoo one, he opens the heavy door and gestures for you to enter first. It’s much warmer inside than the late November air outside, and as you look around, you unzip your jacket.

Despite being together for quite some time now, you’ve never actually been to the tattoo shop, which is partly because it’s been years since he got a new one done. However, he’s deemed that a few need to be touched up, and that’s why you’re here.

Jeongguk’s tattoo artist is a very kind and polite man named Han. He pulls up another comfy-looking chair in black for you to sit beside Jeongguk. 

“So what have you been up to since I last saw you?” he asks as he prepares the ink on the little tray placed on a rolling table.

“Well, I got married,” Jeongguk grins and looks at you. “Three weeks ago.”

“Oh, really?” Han looks away from the tools to let his gaze travel between the two of you. “Congratulations!”

“Thank you.”

You bite your lip, for some reason feeling your cheeks heat up just the slightest.

“You’re very talented, Han,” you change the topic, “You’ve done almost all of his tattoos, and most are just so cool and pretty.”

“‘Most?’” he chuckles, making you backtrack.

“No, no, I meant that they’re all very well done. There’s just one I don’t particularly like, but that’s due to meaning and not execution,” you explain.

“Oh, which one is that?” he inspects Jeongguk’s naked arm where he’s seated on the chair in between you and Han, in only a t-shirt on his top half.

“You don’t say anything, only pointing to the anatomically correct rotting heart. 

“Oh. Yeah,” Han chuckles, making you wonder if he perhaps knows of its backstory.

Jeongguk grins at you and lifts his hand to pat you lovingly on your head. You adore him and his style, and you’ll always be supportive of it, he knows that. Except for the heart. That’s when you’re a self-proclaimed party pooper because although you’re still kinda sweet about it, you do dislike the meaning. He knows that too, and he thinks it’s a little bit funny (and cute) that you care so much about his metaphorical heart and how he sees himself.

And truth be told, he wouldn’t get that tattoo today, but he still doesn’t mind it. It tells his story, and it looks cool.

You don’t fight his patting, “I just think he’s a sweet guy, and I wouldn’t allow him to get something like that today.”

“What would you ‘allow’ me to get, then?” 

You shrug, “I mean, there are a lot of things I wouldn’t mind.”

“Do something, then,” he says happily.

“No, I don’t know if I want any more, at least not now.”

“I meant on me. Han, will you let her do something?”

“What, Gguk?!” you question, not only his words but also his sanity, “No, I’d ruin your skin. Besides, I’m sure it’s like a federal crime.”

“She can decide something, and I can tattoo it?” Han suggests, holding onto Jeongguk’s arm and lowering the needle to his skin.

“Yeah,” Jeongguk peers up at you happily, used to the pain of tattoos.

You’re not smiling as joyously, “Are you sure? I don’t think there’s any use in telling you they’re permanent?”

“You’re my wife, and if you want to choose something for me, I want you to.”

Despite it perhaps being too spontaneous of an idea and also very possibly a bad one, you can’t argue too much. There is something you really would like on him. A certain motive that you’d really love.

“Okay. It’s a tiny one, I’ll do it in grayscale like the rest so it doesn’t stick out too much.”

“You can do color if you want,” Jeongguk reaches for your hand with his left one. “Or just whatever you want. Write your name in your favorite color.”

You stare at him for a few seconds, but he doesn’t waver.

“You’ll regret saying that when I make Han tattoo a pink dick on you.”

Both of them laugh, but Han still shows you where to find an empty sketchbook to draw in and without showing Jeongguk, you get to work.

When he’s done with the touch-up, Han follows you to the farthest corner of the shop where you tell him about the tiny, little outline of a heart you’ve drawn and how you want it in thin red, next to the rotten one.

By his own idea, Jeongguk looks at you the entire time it takes Han to tattoo him, which isn’t more than a few minutes, and he doesn’t peek until everything’s done and you’re following him to the shop’s mirror.

He’s twisting his arm around to see it clearly since it’s halfway hidden beside the big, decaying heart. He’s not smiling anymore, but he’s got that wide and glossy Bambi-eye look that’s so sweet.

Reaching him, you lean your head against his other arm. “I know you think, or at least thought that there was something wrong with your heart. But it works just fine. Almost perfectly, even. And it’s so dear to me. You are, every little part of you.

“But if you ever doubt it, then you’ve got my heart too. It’s not perfect either, but it beats for you.”

It’s a quiet Jeongguk that leaves the tattoo shop with your hand warmly held in his, but he’s not sad. He’s happy and still a little emotional, you can tell. 

Under his jacket, the little red heart drawn by you is wrapped in plastic, and a bit shyly, he admits that he thinks it might be his favorite tattoo yet. 

Of course, despite telling him it can symbolize either of your hearts, he says that he likes the thought of it being yours more. You, however, definitely think his is a better fit.

Because Jeon Jeongguk is a lot of things, but more than anything, he’s a lover.

The adventure

When I close my eyes for the last time,

and all is said and things are through,

I hope you know that

my favorite part of this adventure 

was you.

author's note: so that was it lol, please tell me if you liked it because i really spent time and effort on this big boy of a fic 🥺 and again, here's the playlist!

#evolution of a lover’s heart

[ittomi]

evolution of a lover's heart  | 07

the rules are simple: first one to take the virginity wins.

pairing: fuckboy!jk x f reader

genre: fluff, angst, college au, (post collage au), fuckboy au, bet au

word count: 18.8k

warnings:  as usual, feelings. but also: still domestic abuse, blood due to a minor sewing machine accident :o drunk gguk, complicated family relationships, shirtless jk boxing and sabotaging of a workout that leads to sexie times including pre-negotiated games, jk being a sweetie, some penile fondling lol and mild female masturbation

rating: NC-17 – Adults Only

masterlist

part 7/8 <previous | next>

© evolution of a lover’s heart is copyright jeonstudios 2023. this fic can not be modified, re-posted, or translated without my permission.

author's note: hello!! so, i promised i wouldn't split it anymore but the whole things is more than 35k words and tumblr wouldn't let me post all that as one post... so part 2 of the finale, aka the very last part, will be up in probably 2 days!

Sleep doesn’t come to you. To be fair, you’ve only given it fifteen minutes tops, but you know your body and mind well enough to know when it’s a lost cause. 

So you throw the duvet off you, and you let your feet take you back to the kitchen, this time with a notebook and pen in hand.

You’re a writer. You write. You take your feelings, especially when they’re big and heavy, and you put them into loosely related words. 

But just like slumber, they don’t come to you when you sit at your kitchen table in the dark, the only light source being what’s reflected by the moon.

Sad. Heartache. Guilt. 

Of course, you don’t write those down; that’d be a waste of paper.

Before you know it, you’re finally sobbing. You wonder if Jeongguk ever thought you’d punish him for doing something he considered wrong? Was he scared you’d throw the heart-shaped pizza in his face? Rip the tiny little Forget-me-nots into pieces? 

Ask him to leave because he forgot a date?

The parallels cut through your chest. More so because you also left him at the bar. You didn’t even stop to think more about the situation than that, although his abuser was there, so were his friends, and you didn’t doubt they’d be there for him.

Unlike you. 

Lights moving on the street make you wipe your tears and lean closer to the window. You watch a car pull up and a door open. It’s Jeongguk, and because you know him so well, you can tell not only by his clothes but the way he moves. 

He enters the code and disappears behind the door. You wait a few moments, checking your phone in the meantime. One a.m. He must’ve ordered his own Uber not long after you left.

Soon enough, light floods a few windows on the sixth floor in the complex across the road. You sit there with your pen in your unmoving hand, and that’s when you remember your parting words. Or more specifically: his.

‘And just… call me. If you wanna hang again.’

If

You put your face in your hands as another sob wrecks your body. He didn’t expect you to want to see him again, did he? 

For ten minutes, your pen scribbles in the notebook, and although one or two more tears slip through, you manage to calm down, at least a bit.

Then, dressed in your navy pajamas and with two keys in your pocket, you cross the street.

It’s only when you’re outside his door that you realize you should’ve probably reached out before. But you’re already there, and although his windows were dark when you left, you don’t think he’s already asleep.

To be on the safe side, you knock a few times before you twist the key in the lock.

“Gguk?” you call quietly.

Dumping your shoes at the door, you venture through the darkness until you reach his bedroom. The door has been left open by a sliver, but you knock on that one as well.

When you peer around it, he sits on the side of his bed with the duvet thrown to the side like he’s on his way up. And your heart beats with longing at the sight of him. 

Even through the dark, you can see that he has, as usual, foregone a shirt and is only dressed in a pair of black shorts. His hair is slightly messy, not like he’s been sleeping but at least lied down.

“Are you okay?”

His voice, deep and worried, causes something to break inside you, and your eyes tear up again. “No.” Tentatively, you step closer. “I can’t sleep, not without you and not knowing if we’re okay.”

“Stay? If you want?” he breathes, and it’s all it takes for you to approach his bed.

However, you don’t go for what’s your unofficial side, but you find yourself in front of him.

His skin is warm when you ghost your hand over his arm, and his eyes are a mix of warmth and understanding with a trace of worry. 

“I’m sorry for leaving like that,” you whisper.

He grasps your hand from his arm, holding it softly and rubbing his thumb over the back of it. In turn, you climb onto his lap, letting go of his hand in favor of wrapping your arms around his waist and burying your face in his neck.

Jeongguk rubs your back. “It’s okay.”

You feel your emotions start to bubble up inside you once more, and the tears are blocking your throat.

“No, it’s not,” you argue. “I should’ve stayed with you.”

Finally, a tear spills over again, and your voice breaks, “But it broke my heart, Jeongguk. Hearing all of that? You defending it?”

“I’m sorry, I just didn’t want you to worry about something I don’t think that much about anymore.”

“Tae said she called you. When we were… you know? So are you sure? Do you really not think about her?”

He’s quiet for a while, seemingly gathering his words. “I’m sorry, I’ve never–you’re the only one I’m interested in, and I’ve never spoken to her while we were… together or what it is that we’ve been doing.”

That’s not even remotely something you were worried about. You never suspected him of somehow cheating on you, and you don’t care in case he spoke to someone else when you were broken up. You care that he perhaps spoke to her.

“But you talked to her? Why?”

He takes a few seconds, most likely to gather his thoughts.

“I guess… sometimes being on rock bottom is easier because you don’t have to worry about falling. It’s easier to already know that you won’t succeed than to hope you do and be a disappointment when you don’t. 

“It’s true that I don’t usually think about her, I’ve been so busy thinking about you. But after I broke it off with you, I was lonely… and I just wanted… someone. Maybe to treat me how I deserved and sort of reassure me I did the right thing. But I didn’t actually see her; haven’t done so since we stopped dating years ago.”

You sit back to look at his face, brushing his hair back with your hand. 

Treat me how I deserved

Realizing what he means by that, a pulse of pain shoots through your veins. When you first met Jeongguk, you wouldn’t have described him as innocent. He looked like sin incarnate, always welcoming the next woman to commit acts you wouldn’t speak of in church.

And perhaps he isn’t entirely innocent either, but the way he looks up at you, in no way manipulating, could definitely convince you of the opposite. He’s honest–pure, in a way–longing to belong and prove himself but doubting that anyone really wants him.

“Do you want to talk about it?” you whisper. “You don’t have to, but… it still affects you, doesn’t it?”

Jeongguk looks around the room, quietly contemplating until he exhales heavily and lowers his gaze to somewhere around your mouth.

“What did they tell you? Tae and Jin?”

“Not much, just something about flowers and an… incident at a bar.”

“Okay… you know that I tried dating, right? Well, Tzuyu was the first woman I dated after you–uh, I guess you and I never really… anyway, I met Tzuyu around a year after college. I was out with the guys and ended up following her back to her place. At that time, I had no interest in dating. Or I did, I was just too scared to actually try anything, so I went back to only doing one-night stands. But she asked me to stay the night, and there was… something about her that I…”

He trails off, looking away as if it makes it easier for him.

“I realized later that she sorta had your mannerisms, like her body language reminded me of you, like when you move–she had the same–I don’t know… And I thought that maybe if I really tried, that I could be good for someone. I think she realized pretty soon that I had no clue what I was doing, but I was just grateful to be given a chance. 

“But I remember… being on edge all the time. I made a lot of mistakes, got the wrong gifts, the ugly kinds of flowers, dressed wrong for the occasion, didn’t jump to pay the bill quickly enough, didn’t know when she wanted me to kiss her goodnight or that she just wanted it to be on her cheek…

“I wanted to be a good person, to deserve being loved for once, so I started trying to think of everything. Every little detail that could go wrong, that I could do wrong, but evidently, I didn’t have any experience, and I couldn’t predict anything. And honestly, I still don’t know much. I tried to do everything right, but it rarely worked out that way.”

You focus on your fingers that you let tangle in the hair at the back of his neck. It feels soft against your skin. 

“She told me that I couldn’t expect anyone to love me when I never made any real effort, and when I asked what to do, she said love is easy for the ones meant for it. If I disappointed her, she usually told me to leave, said that my presence wasn’t the gift I thought it was, to go and ‘see if she called.’ She always did sooner or later, and I was always grateful for being given another chance. That somehow, someone still wanted me despite my incompetence. She didn’t… slap me a lot, just a few times. Mostly, she just expressed her distaste in words.

“I stayed because on the off chance that I didn’t fuck up, it could be nice. I liked going out with her and looking like I belonged with someone. Like I wasn’t so dumb and undesirable that no one wanted me for more than a quick fuck. And even when I failed, it wasn’t so bad, I just told myself that I’d do better next time and that I deserved it. But Tae and the others noticed and convinced me to stop seeing her. She kept calling and texting me for a while, I think she just thought I was hot and a good fuck and that she liked to show me and the control she had of me off.

“I guess that maybe some things remain. I don’t really see why anyone should have to put up with me when I mess up, so I’ll leave. But I mean it when I say that the… slaps… weren’t that big of a deal. Sure, it wasn’t… nice, but realistically, a slap isn’t going to do much damage to someone like me.”

You can barely see his face with your eyes filled to the brim with tears. Another one rolls down your cheek, but Jeongguk stops it with his thumb.

“Don’t cry, please. Not for me.”

Of course, saying that has the opposite effect on you, and three more tears spill over in quick succession.

“Gguk, I’d cry all the tears in the world for you,” you sniffle, stroking his cheek. “And it’s not about how much or little it hurt, it’s that–that a partner is someone you should be able to trust, someone that wants the best for you. I get that you’re big and strong and could take it, but you shouldn’t ever have needed to take it. If your significant other does something you’re not happy with, you talk about it. Not try to injure them physically or psychologically.” 

He doesn’t say anything, most likely thinking over your words.

“Thank you for telling me, and you know… you know how I feel about you? Right?”

He nods.

You remember telling him just a couple of days ago, but you can’t keep your mouth shut anyway. “That your presence is the best thing you can give me? That I adore everything you do because you always put your heart and soul into it? That I adore you?”

“I know. And I know that what me and Tzuyu had wasn’t good or healthy, but It’s just hard to break old habits, I suppose.”

“Just whatever you do, never talk to her again. Promise me you’ll never let anyone treat you like that. Never ever let anyone talk down to you, and never let them think they can touch you like that, regardless if it hurts or not.”

He nods again, a small little reassuring smile on his lips.

“And whatever happens between us, if we ever break up, just know that I’ll be doing welfare checks on you. Every third month or so I’ll stop by, and if you have a partner; make sure you’re loved and being treated well.”

This time, Jeongguk is the one to brush your hair behind your ear, smiling in endearment, “I hope that never happens. I only ever want you.”

He watches as you pat your eyes and cheeks with the sleeves of your pajama shirt in an attempt to get rid of the tears. It works alright, but your voice still sounds very choked up when you say, “Good. Then I can love you and treat you like you deserve.”

It looks like he contemplates something, before he nods once, “Sounds good to me. Let’s sleep now.”

Humming in agreement, you move off Jeongguk’s lap and onto the bed, wasting no time in making yourself comfortable next to him. He opens his arms, welcoming you into them, and of course, you’re not one to decline sleeping in his embrace. He’s so warm, so firm and stable, and he smells like safety and comfort.

But before you can let sleep take you, a question lies on your tongue.

“Gguk?”

“Hmm?”

“Did you think that I wouldn’t want to see you again?”

“I don’t know,” he admits right by your ear. “I only realized after you left that I should’ve probably told you all of this before and that I guess I have more baggage than I initially thought. And… baggage can be a dealbreaker for some. So, I wouldn’t blame you, if you decided that it was too much for you to deal with.”

Once again, your heart hurts. God, if there’s one thing you’d wish for, it’s for Jeongguk to see and realize how much he means to you and that you’d never leave him, not for anything.

“I wasn’t upset that you hadn’t told me, just that someone did that to you and that you excused it so easily. But nothing has really changed, you can have all the baggage in the world, and I still wouldn’t trade you for anything.”

You hear his heart beat in his chest. He mumbles a ‘Thank you,’ and tightens his arms around you. But there’s one other thing.

“Did you see her? Tzuyu?”

“No. I left pretty soon after you did, just spoke a bit with the guys first. Didn’t exactly look for her.”

“And how are you feeling?”

“Now? Good. A lot better.”

As Jeongguk’s presence calms you down, you start feeling it too.

“Gguk?”

“Hmm?”

“I’ll make everything better. You’re mine now, and whatever happens, I’ve got you.”

“Do you really have to go?”

“Yeah, you have no idea how excited Yuna is for this movie; she’ll skin me alive if I cancel,” You chuckle, watching a half-naked Jeongguk through the mirror. He stands behind you, a bit to the side, somehow both pouting and glaring at the eyeliner in your hand. “Besides, weren’t you going out with the guys tonight, anyway?”

He grumbles something you don’t understand and keeps staring as you finish your eyeliner on both eyes.

“Put it down,” he instructs when he sees you do the final evaluation and nod in satisfaction.

You raise an eyebrow but do like he said (you were going to anyway).

“Is it like… dry?”

“Yeah, why?”

But the only answer to your question is Jeongguk grabbing you and somehow wrestling you to end up thrown over his shoulders.

“Gguk!” you shriek, but all he does is laugh.

“Can’t believe you’re so rude,” he complains as he marches through the door back into his bedroom. “I was nowhere near done.”

As expected he lays you down on the mattress but gives you no chance to escape before you’re held hostage in his arms. 

Seemingly to his surprise, you hug him back, snuggling into his neck and pulling the covers over your bodies. “Ten minutes then I have to finish getting ready.”

“Really?”

“I mean…do you really think I’m leaving you and this warm bed voluntarily?”

“I don’t think you’re leaving at all, actually.”

“I’ll die if I don’t, and not even you can protect me against Yuna.”

“Hmm,” he seemingly… agrees? and you sigh comfortably, closing your eyes.

“I have a question…” Jeongguk reveals quietly.

It makes you open one eye, “Huh?”

“So… my mom called yesterday. It’s her birthday in a week, and I’m driving there, but I–she wanted me to ask… would you want to go with me?”

“Meet your mom?” you raise your eyebrows, both eyes definitely open now.

He nods. “And her husband and my little brother.”

“Yeah. Of course, Gguk.”

You can feel his exhale of relief against the skin of your neck.

“But what do they think we are? What do they know?”

“About that… I have another question…”

“Okay?”

“Would you…Do you think that you’d want to be my girlfriend?”

Grinning, you turn to face him, rising to your elbow. “Of course. I’d love to. If you’re sure about putting a label on it because we don’t have to, you know?”

“No, I want to! I’ve basically waited almost six years to finally get to ask you.”

“That’s so sweet though. Like high school sweethearts.”

“I didn’t meet him until college.”

Yuna and Yeji both dismiss your correction, their focus entirely on Yeji and her storytelling.

“Yeah,” Yuna agrees, “You know I really didn’t like him at first, but the redemption arc? And poor boy, he’s suffered suffered. Lost her once, almost had to watch her get married to someone else, lost her again–although by his own doing–but now, I really hope it works out. God knows I’ll have his ass if he fucks up intentionally again.”

“So, are you gonna play or what?” you ask, gesturing toward Jeongguk’s big TV and the multiple consoles underneath it.

“Oh, yeah!” Yeji exclaims, “Please thank him again for letting us use his stuff.”

“He’s out with the boys anyway. Besides, he’ll do anything if it makes me more interested in his games,” you snort.

“And you basically live here too so it’s practically your stuff too,” Yuna chuckles. “When are you moving in together?”

From the corner of Jeongguk’s couch, you watch Yeji start a game. It’s one you can’t remember the name of, only that it’s one she was extremely excited to find out that Jeongguk had managed to get on release day.

She gets comfortable on the other end of the couch, and Yuna sits in Jeongguk’s big, matching armchair, legs pulled up underneath her. Even Prof, who you’ve borrowed

 for the weekend–is curled up on the fluffy carpet.

“I don’t want to rush anything. I have a key here, and he has one to mine, and although I’d love to live with him full time, I think it’s best to wait a little. We’ve never really been… stable? Stuff has always happened, some outside our control and others… within it, but, yeah, I think it’s better to wait.”

Yeji’s eyes are glued to the screen as the character on it shoots someone. “I’m really happy for you, I know he’s your ‘The one.’”

You bite your lip, warmth spreading over your smiling cheeks. He really is.

“Oh come on,” Yuna groans, pretending to chuck the controller at the TV.

Yeji laughs at her inexperienced friend and even you grin. 

“You need to press one button at a time. Run first, then jump, and then grab. Otherwise, you won’t be able to reach the rope,” she explains.

“Yeah but it’s so hard?”

Before Yuna can restart, you hear the key twist in the door. Yuna, Yeji, and even Prof–all sitting on the floor like children underneath the huge screen–turn their heads toward the hallway.

You take a look at your watch. It’s almost precisely midnight, but regardless, Jeongguk was supposed to stay at Jimin’s tonight after the bar.

“Hello?”

You frown in confusion. That’s not Jeongguk’s voice, it’s… Taehyung’s.

Seconds later, he comes into view. He looks sober through the dimmed light, but Jeongguk, who’s leaning against his friend with his arm thrown over his shoulder, is probably not. His hair isn’t extremely messy, but definitely more so than when you last saw him, and you can’t even tell if his eyes are open.

“Delivery of one giant baby.”

Not as interested in actually playing the game, you were lying on the couch before sitting up, worried.

“Gguk? I thought you weren’t gonna sleep here? Are you okay?” Your eyes find Taehyung’s. “Is he?”

“I’m not a baby!” Seems like Jeongguk isn’t just as plastered as you previously thought. He lets go of his friend and bends down to remove his shoes clumsily before he staggers toward you.

“I mean, you’re definitely someone’s baby,” Taehyung grins, redirecting his attention to you once more.

It takes two seconds, and then Jeongguk beams, suddenly incredibly proud. “I’m someone’s baby,” he boasts, and you think you hear one of your friends snort.

Taehyung speaks again. “I don’t know what happened, he just drank a bit like the rest of us, said he missed you, drank some more, and wanted to see you, so I walked him.”

“Oh, love,” you open your arms when Jeongguk falls on top of you. “Kind of you to walk him, Tae.”

“Oh, it’s no problem,” Taehyung assures before looking around. “Maybe I should’ve convinced him to stay and go back with us, though. Didn’t know he’d interrupt girls’ night.”

“It’s okay,” Jeongguk suddenly speaks, his cheek resting on your collarbone. “I can be one of the girls too. In fact, I’ve got the best boobs in this building.”

Chuckling, you run one hand through his black hair and the other over his leather jacket.

“Uh, my boobs are, like, at least twice as big as yours,” Yuna comments, glancing back at you over her shoulder.

“I said best, not biggest,” Jeongguk argues. “I had to work for mine, you were just born with them.”

“I wasn’t born with them, dummy.”

“Oh I’m sorry, you were born with the genetics and DNA and shit for them.”

Although… feisty… as you look down at Jeongguk, you can tell he’s exhausted. He struggles to keep his eyes open, and his breaths are already deepening.

“Let’s get you to bed, huh?”

Nodding tiredly, Jeongguk lets you help him up from the couch.

“Thank you, Tae. Why don’t you let us know when you’re back home or with the others?” you suggest, realizing you don’t know what he’s planning. The night is still pretty young, after all.

“It’s no problem, and I’m gonna head back to them, I think, but sure, I’ll send a text,” he smiles.

Even if you’re sure Jeongguk could change by himself, you decide to help him, and he happily lets you.

In the darkness of his bedroom, you slide the black leather jacket off his shoulders and lay it on the bed in the meantime. He’s wearing another button-down, tucked messily into some black jeans and with the first few buttons undone. 

“You’re very… fashionable lately,” you comment teasingly, dragging your index finger down the exposed part of his chest. 

“You like it.” You’re not sure if it’s a question or a statement that comes from  a confident Jeongguk, but you nod regardless.

“Yes, I think you look very handsome.”

He looks down at you with a small lazy smile. Lovingly, you grab his shirt right over his heart and squeeze it before you let go, turning around to find his sleep attire. You open his closet and pull out a drawer, immediately spotting his navy pajamas.

“I’m really, really pathetically in love with you,” he mumbles, eyes only half open when you turn back.

“There’s nothing pathetic about love,” you say, folding the pajamas over your arm. Once again in front of him, you lift your hands to his face, cupping his cheeks sweetly. “But I’m really, really head over heels in love with you too.”

Jeongguk leans his head into your left hand.

“Now, what do you wanna wear? Blue ones okay?”

“No shirt.”

“Okay. Get changed, and I’ll get you some water?”

He hums in response, and you exit the bedroom, walking past the living room where Yuna and Yeji are still playing on your way to the kitchen. Well there, you grab a tall glass from the cupboard and fill it with cold water.

When you return, you spot Jeongguk through the open bathroom door as he brushes his teeth. It’s impossible not to smile to yourself when you see his face in the reflection of the mirror above the sink and realize that his eyes are closed. 

As you wait for him to finish washing up, you place the water on his bedside table and fold the shirt he didn’t want to wear back up again to return it to his closet.

It doesn’t take long before you hear the patter of bare feet behind you and what you think is a yawn, but before you have time to react, an arm snakes around your waist. You’re dragged back until you fall down onto the bed along with the perpetrator who wastes no time in pulling you close.

Although you’re not going to bed just yet, you allow yourself to bask in the moment and in Jeongguk’s satisfied hum that sounds from behind.

“So you’d really consider me your baby?”

Fondness colors your entire expression even if he can’t see it. He’s always been the cutest drunk.

“Of course.”

“Hm. I’ve never been someone’s baby before.”

“Well, you’ve definitely pretty much always been my baby.”

You feel him snuggle closer from behind. “Like you’ve always been my baby?” 

“Yeah. I suppose,” you chuckle.

For a minute, you run your fingers over his arm, until you suspect he’s drifted off, and you do your best to sneak away and shut the door as silently as possible behind you. Yeji and Yuna, you notice, are also keeping their voices down when you return to plop back down on the couch. 

“You really are cute,” Yeji grins, hand stroking Prof’s black fur as it’s Yuna’s turn to play. You feel your cheeks warm up.

“Yeah, it’s sweet, isn’t it? How in love they are?” Yuna sighs almost… dreamily without tearing her eyes away from the screen.

Now and again, Yuna’s opinion of Jeongguk surprises you. Or more like, her words do. You know she doesn’t despise him like she did in college, she made that very clear when she convinced him to tell you how he felt, but you also know she was quite upset after his most recent… mishap.

You lean back, gazing down at your hands shyly despite no one watching you. “I love him, I really do.”

At your quiet confession, Yeji looks back at you with an understanding smile. “We know. And I really hope everything works out, and that it’s smooth sailing from here on. God knows you deserve it.”

Suddenly, you hear footsteps approaching, and a tired Jeongguk appears in the doorway, sleepily rubbing his eye. 

“You left,” he mumbles in pout, still looking so sleepy you think your heart might die on you. Not only is it the adorably messy black hair and pouty lips, but also the warm golden skin, the broad, muscular shoulders, the bulging, veiny arms–one covered in tattoos–and the faint lines of his relaxed abs.

“Yeah, I’ll be with you in a while,” you straighten up to say, “so go to sleep.”

But to your surprise, Jeongguk doesn’t turn around to head back to the bedroom.

“No.”

You watch as he approaches you on the couch and just like earlier, drapes himself over you.

“I’m staying here. With you.”

Sighing under the heavy weight, you still can’t stop the smile from showing or your hands from running over his shoulders.

“You just want to eavesdrop on the girl talk,” Yuna accuses, but the look she gives you is a lighthearted, amused one. One that assures you she’s fine with the party crasher.

Of course, Jeongguk didn’t see it. “Uh, no? I know all about what you talk about. Boys and abs, and I couldn’t care less. I’m just here 'cause I missed her all day.”

You bite your lip to not laugh out loud, and you wonder just how much of that he’d say out loud if he was sober.

Yeji and Yuna snicker to themselves, but it doesn’t seem to affect Jeongguk, who snuggles closer and lets out a big breath.

A little tough but still manageable, you reach for the wool blanket folded over the couch, pulling it to you and unfolding it to lay over your bodies.

By then, Jeongguk’s eyes are closed, and it seems like he’s already mostly asleep. For about an hour, Yuna and Yeji continue playing, at first keeping the sound level low but soon enough noticing that Jeongguk truly is out and won’t wake even if they laugh. When they leave, you drag Jeongguk back to bed before you take Prof outside for a last toilet break, and afterward, you get in bed, cozying up, all three of you.

“Have you seen the car keys?” Jeongguk stresses, and when you peer over at him, he’s lifting the fruit bowl as if the keys would’ve somehow made it underneath it. 

“I saw you put them into your pocket five minutes ago.”

Meeting your eyes, he digs his hand into both front pockets of his black slacks, the keys dangling from his finger soon after.

“Thanks. And, uh, the necklace?”

“In the bag,” you point to the hallway where a light blue gift bag stands.

“Oh. So when are–”

“–Gguk, breathe,” you interrupt, closing the distance between you and fixing the collar of his dark blue shirt. “What’s got you in such a rush? We’ve got loads of time.”

He obeys your instruction, and you watch his chest expand and fill with air before he breathes it back out.

“I just–I guess I’m kinda nervous.” He fiddles with his fingers.

“Why?”

“Well, you know… they aren’t exactly the most pleased with my choice of work. Or that I’ve never brought a partner home before now. Or how I look. Not that they usually comment on everything, but you know, I can tell. And you're in the same type of line of work–creative–and I don’t want them to, I don’t know, insult you somehow…”

“Because of my profession?”

“Yeah. Or maybe call you dumb for settling for a photographer? Try to use you to make me feel dumb and guilty so I’ll change my mind and start working as an accountant or something.”

“Settling for a photographer? A really, really talented, hardworking, and appreciated photographer?” you smile. “Don’t worry about me, okay? And I know it’s easy for me to say as my family has always been supportive, but as long as you think you’ve chosen the path that’s right for you, try not to take it to heart.”

“I’ll try, and I know I did what was right for me, it’s just that sometimes, their insisting makes me second-guess myself. ”

“I understand. But it would be such a waste, not having you do what you do. The world would be a much more gray place.”

He huffs, but you can at least tell you won him over.

The drive is smoother, less anxious than what preparing for it was. It takes roughly an hour, almost as long as a trip to your parents’ does, only in basically the opposite direction.

He lets you pick the music, but you choose to zap through the radio channels instead of playing from your phone. It’s only background noise anyway.

Mostly, it’s his family you talk about. You’ve never known much about them, but even in college, you knew Jeongguk practically only studied ‘economic shit’ because they wanted him to. What you’ve learned since has undoubtedly brought dimension to his family, but you can’t say you adore them just yet.

It’s his mother’s birthday. She lives with her husband and their son–Jeongguk’s ten year younger half-brother. His mothers divorced his dad when Jeongguk was nine, and soon remarried. 

From what you know of his relationship with his dad, you’d say it seems slightly less… complicated. They don’t see each other that often anymore, and he probably doesn’t tell his son how proud he is of him either, but he at least doesn’t seem to have anything against his choice of profession.

You hold Jeongguk’s hand as you walk up the driveway to a very middle-class-looking home. No Picket fence but a green lawn and a white-painted house with large windows.

Holding a bouquet and the little gift bag in one hand, Jeongguk lets go of yours to ring the doorbell, and it isn’t long before you hear footsteps on the other side.

When the door is opened, the woman on the other side beams. “Hi, come on in,” she greets happily, engulfing Jeongguk in a side hug as you enter.

It’s cute, seeing him bend down to hug her, and you realize that he looks a lot like her. The eyes and lips are definitely traits he’s gotten from her.

She seems very kind, and she greets you too, just as politely. “We’re so excited to meet you! And you,” she pokes Jeongguk’s shoulder, “it’s been so long since you last came to visit.”

“Sorry, mom,” Jeongguk apologizes sheepishly, “at least I’m here now. Happy birthday.”

He hands her the bouquet and the gift bag, and she gushes over it as she fishes out the small box and opens it.

Meanwhile, a man appears. “Hi, I’m glad you could make it.” He greets and shakes your hand, “I’m Seungwon.”

Jeongguk, instead of hugging the man like he did his mom, just gives a slight bow of his head.

“Nice to meet you, and thank you for inviting me,” you smile warmly.

“Oh, this is lovely,” Jeongguk’s mom exclaims, pushing the flowers and gift bag to her husband while she holds the necklace in the air. “Thank you so much.”

“It’s no problem, and, uh, I had help picking it out,” Jeongguk gestures toward you.

“Oh no, I just helped him narrow it down, but it was his choice in the end.”

His mom continues to gush over the gift as you’re led into the living room, and you note that Jeongguk’s brother hasn’t made his appearance yet. 

“So, what have you been up to lately?” his mom reaches for a vase on the top shelf of a display cabinet. “Not getting more tattoos, I hope.”

Although it’s said with a bit of humor, you can also tell what her underlying opinion really is. Jeongguk shifts from one foot to the other beside you, and discreetly, you step closer, leaning into him and stroking his back over his shirt.

You know that he feels shame for being who he is and also for being treated the way he is.

“No, no tattoos,” he mumbles, smiling a bit awkwardly.

“Good. Now the next step is just to laser them away. Other than that, you look so handsome tonight, really dapper in a shirt like that! Where’d you get it?”

You all look down at his shirt. It’s dark navy, bordering on black, it has a collar, and the buttons that run down the middle are hidden behind a panel of the same fabric.

“Oh, Y/n actually sewed it for me.”

“Really? Wow, you’re so talented. I absolutely love it.” She lowers the flowers down on the coffee table and smilingly backs out of the living room with the vase to fill it with water.

“Thank you…” you trail off, turning to look up at Jeongguk. He merely glances at you quickly and smiles stiffly.

Dinner goes… well. Okay, at least. If nothing else, you’ve found a new understanding of Jeongguk and his relationship with this part of his family. They’re not… mean. Not in the way that leaves you angry and confident in your emotion, but instead, you leave, feeling a tenth smaller and somewhat… second-guessing yourself. 

Something else that happens, something… odd… is when you’re asked about your interests. You of course answer that you like to write and read and watch movies and sew. And you mention Prof and how you like taking him for walks.

“I love dogs,” Jeongguk’s younger brother, Jeonghyun comments. It makes you smile, seeing that familiar kind of spark in his dark eyes. He’s in his late teens, nearly as tall as Jeongguk, but with his hair styled more upwards at the front. 

Then you remember, and your face takes on an expression of sadness. “I heard about… your dog, Gureum, was it? I’m so sorry, losing a pet is never easy.”

But where you expected understanding and somberness, maybe even a tear from a particularly sad family member, there’s only surprise and confusion. Jeongguk shifts beside you.

“Uh, we’ve never… had a dog?” Jeongguk’s mom states, though the confusion turns it into a question.

You furrow your brows and turn to look at the man beside you. “But… you said your family dog died? When you cried at the reunion?”

Smiling toward his plate, Jeongguk brings his napkin to his mouth and dabs his lips. “I lied.”

“Huh? Then what…”

“I cried over you, actually.”

The still very confused audience loses your focus as his words settle and the realization sinks in. With an empathic look, you lift your arm to Jeongguk’s shoulder and let it run over his shirt to the back of his neck where you stroke his skin. 

Your gaze is still locked on the man you love so painfully much when he chuckles and decides to offer his befuddled family a short explanation.

“We went to a college reunion together as friends back when she was still engaged to her ex.”

Silence envelopes the room, and you honestly feel a bit bad for unknowingly bringing the topic up, but it only lasts a few seconds.

“Oh, that’s… kind of a sweet story, actually,” Seungwon says, and you agree; it’s sweet but in a heartbreaking way.

However, Jeonghyun doesn’t share the sentiment, or at least he doesn’t voice it. “Wimp,” he grins.

“Uh, excuse me?” Jeongguk blinks dramatically with raised eyebrows. “Do you want me to tell mom what–”

“--No, no no, I’m sorry, you know I didn’t mean it,” the younger one backpedals, smiling pleadingly. 

Jeongguk narrows his eyes playfully. “That’s what I thought.” 

You look at the two brothers just as puzzled and curious as their parents.

When an hour has passed since you finished eating, Jeonghyun excuses himself, saying that he has homework he needs to finish. Like a domino reaction, chairs move over the carpet as the rest of you decide that you’re also finished and should start to tidy up.

“I’ll take those,” Jeongguk’s mom reaches for the plates you’ve collected from the table, but you continue, grabbing utensils to put on top of the stack. “Oh, I don’t mind helping!”

A second of contemplating flashes in her eyes before she agrees to let you help. For some reason, Jeongguk, who just returned from the bathroom, grasps your wrist as you’re on your way to follow his mom to the kitchen.

You see the worry brewing in his eyes, but you’re not scared of his mom, and maybe, getting to know her better could be beneficial.

“It’s okay,” you whisper. “Go and make the bed ready or something.”

“Just… leave if she says something. We don’t have to sleep over, I don’t mind driving. Or we could even take a cab or something, but just know that you don’t have to listen to anything that makes you uncomfortable.”

“I know, Gguk. I’ll be fine, okay?”

Nodding, he lets go of your hand and watches as you leave the room.

One by one, the two of you rinse the dishes and utensils and load them into the dishwasher. You compliment Jeongguk’s mom on the food, and she lights up at your words. Her eyes shine, and then she gazes at you for a second and… chuckles. Not disgusted or demeaning, but… lightheartedly.

“What?” you question, a somewhat confused smile pulling on your own lips.

“It’s just… you’re not exactly what I pictured for him.”

Surprised and a little startled, you blink, “Uh, what… what do you mean by that?”

Your hesitancy apparently makes her realize something. “Oh, no, not in a bad way. Just that, well, look at you,” she nods toward you as she hands you another plate to place in the dishwasher. “You’re very pretty, very put-together and bright and proper. You and him seem very different.”

You glance down at your outfit. A white blouse adorns your top half and high-waisted blue pants your bottom. It doesn’t say very much about your style, just that you chose to play it safe tonight.

“And he’s always dressed in black more or less and with all those scribbles on his arm. But I’m happy for you, I really am. Maybe he’ll come to his senses about things, or at least stop to think before doing them.”

Your brain and your heart are pulling at you in two different directions. The last thing you want is to pick a fight with Jeongguk’s mom, maybe even be the reason their relationship worsens, but…

“You know that it hurts him, right?” your heart wins, and your voice asks as quietly and non-confrontational as possible.

She looks at you.

“I don’t want to influence him in any way; I love him just the way he is, and I think he’s incredibly brave, daring to go his own way–to pursue happiness instead of doing what was expected of him. He’s still a sweetheart, even with the tattoos and all the black. And as for his job? Can I ask you… Have you seen his pictures? Read the comments and reviews people leave? He is so talented, so gifted. He brings people’s visions to life, eternalizes their most important moments for them.

“But he’s still sweet and soft, I know you know that too, and yeah, he did go his own way, but it hurts him to know that he doesn’t live up to your expectations, that he had to choose, even if he won’t tell you that himself.”

You bite your lip as you watch her. She looks away, thinking, but you believe she’s considering your words. And of course, you pray that you didn’t step too far out of line.

“Yeah…” she breathes distantly, “I’m… I’m happy he’s got you. Thank you.”

Not exactly what you expected, but at least you’re not screamed at and thrown out, so you nod gratefully. 

“And thank you for helping,” she gestures toward the clean kitchen before starting the dishwasher. Its humming fills the room and eases whatever tension’s in there.

“My pleasure.”

She excuses herself after that, leaving the kitchen, looking deep in thought, and maybe it’s just your hopeful heart, but you think you saw a hint of remorse in the crease between her eyebrows and swimming in her dark eyes.

Sometimes, people get caught up in old habits, doing things they’ve always just done, and maybe sometimes, things change without them noticing.

For five seconds, you stand alone in the empty kitchen before you turn to exit it too. The TV sounds from your right, and you hear Seungwon’s voice welcome Jeongguk’s mom into the living room. 

Assuming Jeongguk went up to his old bedroom, you set your sight on the staircase in front of you, but before you can take the first step, you’re pulled by your left arm.

Back in the dining room, your wide eyes look up to find Jeongguk smirking down at you. Immediately, you think back to the conversation you had with his mom, and if he was down here, just a room over, then he surely heard things. The question is only what. And of course, what he thinks about it.

“You know, I didn’t mean to eavesdrop,” he starts, still holding onto your elbow as he pulls you closer. “But–”

“–You did?” you finish for him, hand reaching up to find the collar of his shirt. You’re actually really happy with the finished garment, but you can’t say you don’t miss the strip of his chest he usually exposes these days.

“Yeah.”

He looks happy. It’s everywhere, from the somewhat cocky smirk to the crinkling outer corners of his eyes, but you feel like you need to hear his thoughts.

“And? I mean, how much did you hear?”

With the utmost care, Jeongguk lets go of your arm to cup your cheek instead, his thumb stroking lightly over the skin under your eye. “I think… I’m incredibly lucky.”

You don’t really know what to say, too caught up in his genuine dark eyes and the warmth of his palm against your cheek.

“Come on, I wanna show you something.”

Jeongguk’s hand falls from your face to grasp yours and lead you out of the dining room and toward the back door. Looking down, you see that he’s holding a folded-up gray blanket that you hadn’t even noticed.

It doesn’t take you long to realize that he’s taking you outside and that one, he’s already wearing his black sneakers, and two, your shoes are still at the other entrance.

“Gguk, my shoes are at the front door,” you whisper as he grasps the door handle to twist it open.

He turns back, eyes dropping to your sock-clad feet. To your surprise, he shrugs, turns back around, and opens the door like your words didn’t mean anything.

Or so you thought.

He hands you the blanket, “Hold this.”

And before you can voice your concerns about going outside in the slightly wet grass of his parents’ backyard, Jeongguk turns to face you once more, smiling carefree as he bends down and picks you up bridal style.

“What are you doing?” you giggle, trying to keep quiet.

“Already told you; I wanna show you something,” he explains, carrying you through the open door and spinning back around, “close it for me?”

Doing as told, you shut the door, and happy with the result, Jeongguk starts walking.

The yard is mid-sized, containing a freshly mowed lawn within a surrounding, tall, wooden fence. On the right, two thick trees are rooted, stretching their branches as far as they can, and under them, a little pond begins. 

Under the branches and in front of the pond, you spot the back of a dark blue hammock.

It’s to that hammock Jeongguk’s steps are approaching. “You like it?” he teases warmly, obviously having noticed your awe. 

“Yeah. It’s so… serene.”

It really is. Since it’s late October and the year is nearing its end, the air holds a certain chill, especially at this hour. The sky is dark but clear of clouds, and the moon casts its reflection onto the motionless water, joining the warmer bursts of light coming from the house behind you.  

“I’d sit here all day, writing or reading,” you dream out loud.

Jeongguk chuckles as he sits down with you on his lap, grabbing the blanket from your hands to spread over your bodies. 

With you sideways over his lap and your arm around his neck, your hand soon finds the tresses of dark hair at the back of his neck. In turn, Jeongguk holds your waist, one hand dipping under your shirt to stroke the skin there.

You exhale. The air let go from your lungs contains a combination of relief and tranquility. Today wasn’t necessarily a rough day, but it did take energy. In the end, it worked out well, probably as well as it could, and you can’t imagine the relief that Jeongguk’s feeling.

“Thank you,” he speaks quietly, choosing that moment to also kick off from the ground to make the hammock swing.

You look at him, inspecting the side of his face as he gazes forward.

“For what?” you ask, assuming it’s about what you said to his mother.

“For… being who you are. Caring for me.”

Moving your hand, you let the back of your fingers stroke his cheek briefly. “You don’t need to thank me for that.”

But he looks at you, a determined tick between his eyebrows. “I want to. You make such a difference, you have such an influence on people.”

Despite everything that’s happened, you know very well (at least deep down) what Jeongguk really thinks of you. He’s explained it before, and you can see it in his eyes, but it doesn’t keep your heart from warming. 

Although you’d argue that he thinks you’re a bit too good, it’s vastly different from how you’ve lived your life, partially in the shadows and not really seen.

“They like you, I can tell. Even Jeonghyun, and he’s usually not very interested in ‘grown up’ guests these days, but he clearly likes you enough to stay as long as he did.”

“Or maybe he stayed as long as he did because he missed his brother? Wanted to spend time with you regardless of who you brought?”

“Hmm… no. I mean, sure, maybe he did miss me, but I think he mostly really liked you. Maybe even got a crush; I think there was a little too much of a sparkle in his eye.” 

It’s the tone, the slightest little teeny tiny bit of… faux jealousy that makes you laugh. “Too bad. Besides creepy, ethically wrong, and… illegal, I’ve found my person already.”

Jeongguk raises his hand to grab yours that rests in your lap. The blanket hides them from sight, but you feel his hand envelop yours, eventually intertwining your fingers. It makes you smile. 

You love his hands so much; they’re so capable, so strong and warm and masculine, but they’re also so… pretty. You lower your other hand too, slipping it inside the blanket to hold his one hand in both of yours, tracing the prominent veins with your fingers.

A few seconds pass, Jeongguk pushing off the ground again when the hammock starts to slow down. “I’m just relieved it went okay.”

You squeeze his hand once. “You worry too much.”

“I know,” he agrees quietly before suddenly changing the subject. “So… I thought about… what does your family think about us? I mean, I know you told them about…”

“–Being your girlfriend?”

“Yeah. Almost doesn’t seem real… But I remember before, the first time I met them at yours, and your mom heard my name and just looked at me like…”

“Like she knew I’d loved you since college?”

His head whips up to look at you. “Di–did you tell them? About college? What happ–what I… did?”

It’s easy to see the fear and pain in his eyes as he reconsiders what he knew about your family. He’s surely thinking back to when he met them, ashamed of himself.

“No, I didn’t,” you explain softly. “But back then, I did tell my mother about this boy I met, about his kind brown eyes and how he broke my heart when it didn’t work out.”

Jeongguk wants to interrupt you, but you don’t let him.

“Jeongguk, a heartbreak doesn’t need to be intentional, my mom knows that too. I never mentioned you by name or revealed any details.”

“Then how did she know it was me?”

You turn your head, eyes gazing up at the night sky. “I never told anyone where I got the inspiration for my tattoo from, just that it reminded me of someone. But when a man I knew a long time ago shows up, a man with a tattoo of a swallow and sweet brown eyes? It had to be you,” you chuckle.  

When you look back at him, Jeongguk seems to be deep in thought.

“I know that you say that you’ve… loved me for a long time. But…”

You hum when he trails off, encouraging him to continue.

“But did you love love me? Since then? Or did you move on and you… caught feelings again?”

“I did love love you,” you answer truthfully, gently even though you know you’ve definitely told him how you felt in college before. 

“Gguk, I was head over heels for you. And, I guess afterward… I thought I had to move on and start over as usual, but whereas I stored my feelings for you away like I did everyone that hurt me, the ones I held for you never died out. I tried not to think about you, especially when I met Namjoon because it made me feel bad to have my heart skip a beat as I thought about another man, and I knew I wasn’t going to see you again. And since I loved Namjoon a lot too, it became easier over time. But… deep down, I–”

“Felt like something was missing?”

“Yeah.”

“So, we could’ve really been on our sixth year together if I hadn’t fucked up? I wasted five years, and even then, it was basically just a weird coincidence that we actually met again.”

The way he purses his lips tells you how upset the thought makes him. Both that you could’ve spent five more years together, and that, realistically, you very much could’ve just… never met again.

“I think, in all the universes, we were meant to find each other.”

Your words seem to relax him a bit, although he evidently still wants to argue. “But still, we could’ve had five more years?”

“You don’t know that. What if in the universes where we do get together immediately it doesn’t work out? What if you tell me about the bet, I forgive you and we go on that date, but then six months later I die in a car accident?”

Jeongguk’s wide, horrified eyes tell you that maybe you took it a bit too far, but you only sigh still somewhat happily.

“What I mean is that you shouldn’t beat yourself up over it, okay? Sure, a lot of… not so great things have happened during these five years, but there’s no use in adding more regrets to it now because it turned out well in the end, and we’re still young, aren’t we?”

Jeongguk pouts, but you can see that you won him over. “I guess,” he says and rolls his eyes.

“I guess,” you mock, laughing happily when he turns to face you with his eyebrows raised. He’s terrible at hiding his happiness too.

“Now you gotta tell me some childhood stories, and tomorrow I need you to bring me absolutely all the photo albums,” you order as you shift on his lap, sinking down further and leaning your head against his neck. Jeongguk snickers but doesn’t fight your request. 

Jeongguk’s struggles get easier as time goes on. During the first few months, he evidently struggles a lot with who he is and who he should be, but then, something happens.

There’s a change. A shift.

He was supposed to be out late tonight, having prepared you that he most likely would sleep at Tae’s since he had a huge apartment near their bar of choice for the night. But a woman spilled splashes of her drink on his shirt as she walked by, and that soured his mood. When he later texted you a cute little note and your answer came in short–polite but short, he decided to just leave.

He didn’t think anything was necessarily wrong with you, he just didn’t have a good time, and would rather see if he could spend the night with you, bettering both your moods.

It’s only ten thirty p.m. when he unlocks his front door, smiling when he hears the sound of your sewing machine. He can practically see it, you, concentrated to the point of looking angry, with your lip bitten as you start another project.

After locking the door behind him and removing his shoes and jacket, the first thing Jeongguk does is yank the shirt off him, leaving his top half naked as he heads directly toward his bedroom.

Not bothering to waste an entirely clean shirt, he settles for the black t-shirt already hanging over the chair in the corner.

If he stopped to think about it, he’d find it a bit odd that you haven’t called out to him yet, but then again, he’d probably blame it on the volume of the machine.

However, the dumb smile he’s wearing falls when he enters the kitchen where you’ve set up your stuff.

The machine’s noise echoes through the kitchen, and it’s no wonder you hadn’t noticed him, startling when you see him. 

Immediately, you wipe at your eyes with the back of your hand that’s filled with tissues. 

“Hey… what’s wrong?” Jeongguk calls, heart aching by seeing the tears you try to hide. He moves to your side. “Are you crying?”

It’s not very convincing, the smile you force between silent tears. “I’m fine, I promise. I just had a little accident. I… sewed myself in the finger.”

When Jeongguk inspects your hand, he sees that parts of the white tissues you hold–pressed against your finger–are slowly turning red.

“Let me see,” he urges, but you shake your head.

“It’s nothing bad.”

The whirring begins again as you restart the machine, and Jeongguk stops his thoughts to look at the fabric draped through it.

“Is that Mrs. Lee’s dresses? I thought you were done with them?” he questions.

A neighbor of yours, Mrs. Lee, had asked you to alter four dresses for her young daughters to wear to a… what was it? Wedding? Baptizing? Jeongguk can’t remember, but he knows you already returned them, altered to her wishes.

“Yeah, she gave me the wrong measurements, so I have to redo, well, everything. And she brought her niece’s too,” you chuckle, but there’s no humor or joy in it. Just sadness, stress, and …heartbreak?

He lowers himself to his haunches beside you, noticing the traces of blood on the white machine. “Hey, let me look at your hand. If it’s not bad then let me at least bandage it.”

“Gguk, I need to get this done, maybe later.”

“When did you say the… event was?”

“Tomorrow. They need them early, but I can still make it if I just–”

“–Stay up all night?”

You don’t answer him, at least not verbally, but your pursed lips and sad eyes are answer enough. Judging by how long it took you to alter the dresses last time, Jeongguk isn’t sure you’re going to make it. If you do, it’s only if you spend every waking moment working on them.

He hates to see you so stressed and honestly, taken advantage of. He could almost understand if it were a friend or a nice neighbor who just happened to find themselves in the shit, but Mrs. Lee could learn a thing or two about politeness.

“Was she at least nice about it?”

His suspicion grows when you don’t say anything, but he notices you sinking in slightly on yourself.

Jeongguk reaches over and turns the machine off. “Hey, what did she tell you?” he asks, his voice quiet and understanding. 

You keep your teary gaze locked on the needle that’s halfway through the dress, your fingers holding the fabric in place.

“I said that there just wasn’t enough time to do all five dresses tonight,” you mumble quietly, “and she asked me if I wanted to be known as something more than the neighborhood slut.” 

Jeongguk blinks his wide eyes in utter disbelief before his blood slowly but surely starts to boil. “What?” 

“Yeah. I mean, I guess I sorta had it coming; a new guy moved into the neighborhood, and I wasted no time dumping Joon to be all over you.”

“That’s not true. She doesn’t know anything,” Jeongguk attempts to convince you. He wishes you’d look at him. 

Gently, he reaches for your hand on the sewing machine, taking it in his. “Do you want to continue?”

“It’s okay, Gguk, it’s just one night. I’ll try to finish them.”

But he sees how tired and sad you are, and he knows that you aren’t about to fight for yourself.

“I know you’d try, but do you want to?”

Of course, you can’t lie to him, even if you find it too hard to actually say the words.

“Gguk, I appreciate it, but I can’t stop now. They need them for tomorrow. I can’t disappoint her like that.”

“I can.”

You won’t fight for yourself. But he will.

“I’ll tell her I had something of mine I needed you to fix first. She can think I didn’t let you so that it wasn’t your choice, I don’t care.”

He sees the worry in your eyes, “Please, there’s no need for you to get involved. You know how she likes to talk to everyone. The whole neighborhood will think you’re an ass.”

“I don’t mind, she can talk all she wants. If she wanted your help then she should’ve asked nicely and in time. And when she didn’t, she should’ve definitely accepted a ‘no.’”

But your pleading eyes make him falter, and he kneels again.

“Do you really not want me to?”

You don’t give him an answer immediately. 

“Gguk…”

But that’s answer enough for him already.

He waits patiently by your side as you finish up the one seam you were in the middle of doing, and then you hand him the red dress. There’s still that uncomfortable expression on your face, but Jeongguk knows he’s doing the right thing, and he knows you would’ve told him if you really didn’t want him to. 

He puts the dress along with the four others you hadn’t gotten to yet in a plastic bag and wastes no time in putting his shoes back on. He doesn’t bother with a jacket since it won’t take that long.

For someone who’s so intent on being good enough for you, he’s not at all nervous. He’ll be an asshole, he doesn’t give a single fuck.

It takes a few minutes for him to leave his apartment complex, cross the street, and enter yours. You told him the exact floor and door Mrs. Lee lives in since he didn’t actually know, and when he’s outside the door, he knocks on it rapidly.

Sure, it’s almost eleven p.m., and evidently, she has kids, but Jeongguk doesn’t care that much. If anything, he feels bad for them for having her as their mother.

“Excuse me?” the short woman utters as she opens the door. Clearly, by the black robe on her body, she was either asleep or going to be soon, and that makes Jeongguk even angrier. 

Logically, he realizes not everyone can sew, but to sleep soundly while you work your ass off, so stressed that you not only sew yourself in the finger but don’t even have time to take a break and clean it up.

“Here,” he speaks emotionlessly and thrusts the bag in her direction.

“What… Oh, is she done already?”

Jeongguk almost laughs but stops himself. “No. You’re gonna have to find some other dresses or something, I don’t know.”

The older woman takes the bag and opens it to look inside, anger visibly starting to surface. “That little…”

“Oh, don’t you dare,” he warns, glaring furiously. “Do you realize how much time it would’ve taken for her to finish all five dresses? She wouldn’t have been able to leave the sewing machine for even a second, all night. And believe me, she would’ve done it. Not because you deserve it, because you’re the rudest, most entitled fucking woman I’ve ever met, but because she’s a goddamn sweetheart. I stopped her because I’m not gonna let someone like you use her till she breaks while you get a good night’s sleep over here. So, do me a big, fucking favor and don’t talk to her again, got it? She’s not gonna help anymore.”

Mrs. Lee glares back at him but doesn’t say anything, which Jeongguk takes as a victory. He hasn’t run into her a lot, but whenever he has, he’s noticed that she’s appeared a lot “friendlier” to people not looking… like him. 

Honestly, she wouldn’t even look at him properly whenever he’d meet her at the elevator in your complex, and sure, he’s used to older women finding him scary-looking so he didn’t care that much, just nodded in greeting. 

Perhaps the exposed tattoos, piercings, and furious glare did the job. He starts to back away before his mouth opens again, practically on its own accord.

“I’ve loved her for so fucking long, and she… All she ever does is try to make everyone else happy, but she’s finally–” 

He doesn’t know exactly where he’s going with it, he’s just trying to make her realize that you’re not a slut, you didn’t throw away Namjoon for just a random guy. There’s so much more to the story, things he can’t tell her either way. 

So he gives up, assuming he got his point across anyway. “Just don’t talk to her again.”  

He marches away, back to the elevator and his own apartment complex. When back in his own home, he kicks off his shoes, and immediately calls your name.

“Bathroom,” he hears you call back, and as he reaches the door, it’s open, so he enters.

Your voice is quiet, and you’re carefully looking through his bathroom cabinet. “Do you have any bandaids?”

Seeing you hold your injured hand to your chest, paper tissues still pressed toward your pointer finger by your thumb, reminds him of when he first saw you again, and you had a bandaged wrist.

“Here,” he says, turning to the larger cabinet that’s placed over his washing machine. He takes down the first aid kit from the shelf and puts it on the sink. “Can I see?”

You nod, and so he asks you to sit on the lid of the toilet and kneels before you.

Your hand is trembling when you put it in his, palm up, and as gently as he can, he removes the bloodstained paper.

Prepared to see the worst like the needle having gone through your nail or somehow even bone, relief floods Jeongguk’s heart when he sees that the little dot leaking blood happens to be just beside your nail. It’s far out enough to not have hit anything too bad, even if he’s sure it hurts. 

“Okay, it doesn’t look too bad. Let’s rinse it first, okay?”

You nod in approval, standing up and letting him maneuver your hand under the tap. Jeongguk opens it and lets the water run over your finger for a bit, and when he feels like it’s done its job, he tells you to sit down again.

From the first aid kit, he retrieves an antiseptic wipe just to be safe. Maybe overkill, but he’s heard that fingers, particularly anything close to a joint, are sensitive matters, and infections can be detrimental.

You allow him to clean both sides of your finger, not showing if it stings. You just look sad, helpless even.

“So how did it go?” you ask tentatively just as he disposes of the wipe into the sink to deal with later.

“I cursed her out,” he smiles, but he can tell by how your eyebrows raise only in the middle of your forehead that you’re not very happy by that. 

“But I made sure to let her know that you were absolutely set on doing it for her, and that I was the one who wasn’t gonna let that happen. Because I think she’s rude and entitled, expecting you to work endlessly throughout the night for free when she’s resting her little head on her pillow. And I told her not to speak to you again.”

Apparently, but not very surprisingly, being blame-free seems to relax you, and you nod, looking to be thinking about something.

“Gguk, a regular bandaid will be fine,” you assure when you see him reach for the gauze. 

He pouts in protest. He can’t help that he wants to take care of you to the best of his abilities, especially when you’re still teary-eyed and breaking his heart. But he obeys, huffing slightly when he has to put the gauze back and get a plaster instead, something he wouldn’t even have bothered with if it were his own finger.

At least you wear a fond and perhaps even relieved smile when he kneels before you once more to carefully wrap the plaster around your finger even though you definitely could do it by yourself.

“There, all done,” he grins up at you as he lets go of your hand. But then he remembers something. “Wait. One more thing.”

Confusion flashes across your face, but you lift your hand to him again. His smile grows further when he takes it and brings it to his mouth, placing the sweetest of kisses on the back of it.

Happiness fills his chest when the action makes you giggle. You lift your other hand to wipe the remaining tears away with your sleeve.

He keeps your hand in his, stroking his thumb over it. “What do you want to do now?”

“I don’t know,” you exhale in an exhausted whisper, “I’m really tired.”

“Do you wanna start a movie with me, you can sleep if you get too tired?”

His proposition makes you nod eagerly.

It takes Jeongguk approximately four minutes to choose one of your favorite movies, turn it on, and flick the lights in the living room off. Then he gathers a few pillows and blankets in the corner and gestures for you to climb onto his lap.

You do, placing yourself sideways like always and leaning your head against his neck. In turn, Jeongguk holds you close to his chest.

“If she says something to you again, just walk away, okay? And tell me, please?” he begs a few minutes into the film.

“Okay,” you mumble back without taking your eyes off the screen.

“Good… I just can’t believe she would say that to you. Especially after you’ve already altered her dresses once. Like, I’m terrible at math but I’m pretty sure it’s not that hard to take measurements? How do you fuck up all four dresses?”

“She didn’t actually take them,” you reveal, still engrossed in the movie. “She told me she knew her kids well enough to ‘estimate.’”

“What?” Jeongguk coughs, “She guessed?! And then returned them the night before to threaten you to redo them, even going as far as to add another dress as well?!”

“Basically, yeah.”

Jeongguk scoffs. “The nerve of some people.”

You hum tiredly in agreement, and slowly but surely, Jeongguk returns his attention to the movie playing.

Until it happens. 

You’re sleepy, he can tell despite not being able to see your face. Your breaths are heavy and warm where you breathe them against the side of his neck, and he wonders if you even have your eyes open anymore. Your hands, always finding some little part of his skin to stroke lovingly, are too tired, folded up in your lap.

Even your voice sounds tired, but he hears it clear as day.

“Thank you.”

And it’s those two words that begin the shift in him. His spine and something in his heart, or maybe around it, solidifies as it sinks in that he’s found it.

Who he can be to you. His purpose. He does have something to give in return, and his entire body fills with relief and joy and pure determination.

Although it of course would be easier if you learned to stand up for yourself–and he knows he’ll always encourage it–in an ideal world, you would never have to change any part of yourself. 

And he can give that to you–at least he’ll do his goddamn best to–let you be yourself, and fend off anyone who wants to tarnish the love and generosity that is you. That’s his purpose. 

It gets easier after that. Sure, there will always be moments where he wonders if maybe you wouldn’t be better off with someone else, but those thoughts lessen, both in frequency and power.

Honestly, Jeongguk can’t take all the credit for his improved confidence because the largest influence has been, well, you.

Besides gently bringing up the topic of therapy—something he’s not really sure of, at least not at the moment—you’ve taken his mental health into your own loving hands.

Because even if he wants to claim it to be a walk in the park, sometimes the past still gets to him.

He sits on his bed, leaning back against the headboard and with his laptop across his thighs, scrolling the internet. Thanks to Facebook and its weird algorithms, he stumbles upon an article about anniversaries and how to best show your loved one your appreciation.

And so the cogwheels start to turn. Or maybe a piece of dirt gets lodged in there, stopping the entire machinery that is Jeongguk’s head.

His eyes drift from the screen, staring unfocused at the bedroom window.

”Would you wanna go for a walk with me later?”

He turns his head toward the sound of your voice and finds you in the doorway, hand holding onto the doorframe and almost leaning your face against it.

”Yeah,” Jeongguk nods, mustering a small smile.

But if one thing’s true, it’s that you rarely miss when he’s back in that mindset.

Your eyes search his face for a moment, and he can feel all the warmth and love and care seep into the room just because you’ve peeked your head inside.

”Bad thoughts?” You ask quietly, your soft voice carried through the air.

Jeongguk exhales. ”…Yeah.”

He watches you push off the doorframe and take the steps until you’re at the foot of the bed.

”Is it something you wanna talk about?”

You’re so sweet, so understanding and unjudging, where you come to sit on the edge of the bed, watching him with your head tilted slightly. 

A sigh leaves his lips, and his shoulders slump. The sky outside the window is gray when he peers through it.

”We don’t have an anniversary, do we?”

”Sure we do. We had to start seeing each other some day.”

”Yeah, but… None that’s worth celebrating? We can’t… the day we met in college… I can’t celebrate that,” he casts his eyes down, shame filling his body like it always does when he thinks about the bet and that it’s the only reason you ever got to know each other.

”And we can’t pretend like my five-hundred first date attempts are worth celebrating either because then, I—” fucked everything up again.

”How about a month ago? When you asked me to be your girlfriend? I’d say that would be a natural choice?”

Jeongguk nods, doing his best to pretend that your answer satisfied him. It did when it comes to the specific date, but after, he’s just stuck on the concept of an anniversary with you. He’s terrified of forgetting it, of not being able to convey to you just how much you mean to him.

Of course, you notice that too, and decide to crawl over to where he’s sitting. Slowly, you grasp the laptop from his hands and shut it to place somewhere else on the bed, and when he looks at you, questioningly, you tell him to lie down completely.

When his head hits the pillow, you make yourself comfortable where you’re sitting beside him, and then, he feels your finger on the side of his face. It’s right at his temple; your nail moving in tiny circles across his skin. 

He barely manages to contain the shiver that wants to travel through his entire body. ”What…?”

”Okay, so you know in Harry Potter and… I can’t remember which one… The fifth? Sixth? When you get to see Dumbledore use his wand to pull memories from his mind? Into the weird bowl?”

You’re smiling, the tiniest bit of mischief blended together with the happiness. ”That’s what I’m doing now, but with the bad thoughts. Although, I’m not gonna look at them, we’re just gonna take them out, okay?”

It’s a bit silly, seeing you pinch the air between your index finger and thumb and pull something invisible from his temple, but Jeongguk can’t help but smile.

“Then, we’ll cast a spell that prohibits them from being in this room,” you declare, putting your fist up with just your index finger sticking out as a wand. You move it in circles toward the bedroom door. “Wingardium… capricciosa… or something, I don’t know.” 

Jeongguk snorts, and maybe it isn’t even that silly because he finds that it does work, and every subsequent room you ban the bad thoughts from make it easier for him.

You also help him with his confidence, in more ways than one. Maybe more than you know as well.

To be fair, even if Jeongguk isn’t as proud of his body as he was when he was younger, it’s probably the thing he’s the least self conscious about. However, he can’t say that you’re not stroking his ego, intentionally or not.

In initially incredibly bad news, the gym Jeongguk visits has had a water leak. He feels for the owner and mourns the expensive machines that were destroyed, and while the facility gets renovated, which will take weeks, maybe even months, Jeongguk has ordered a bit of equipment himself.

It’s mostly dumbbells and mats of different kinds. And the punching bag, hanging from a stand that he was able to borrow from a friend. There’s also a frame for him to practice his pullups on, one that can be dismantled and stored away when not in use.

And where do you come into the picture? Well, Jeongguk has noticed that as soon as the sound of equipment being gathered and prepared, you seem to always ‘happen’ to find yourself in the same room, a book in your hand. 

Weirdly enough, it’s been the same book for multiple weeks, and you don’t really seem to make any progress with it. Truthfully, he doesn’t mind. If anything, he thinks it’s cute, hot, and it gives him the final push to work harder.

Sometimes, he wears a t-shirt or a tank top with his shorts, other times–like today–he chooses to go shirtless. 

“Oh, are you gonna work out?” you ask innocently, sitting down on the couch with that same book in your hand, already opened. 

It’s not even funny how much effort it takes for him to not abandon the task at hand and instead get cozy on the couch, wiggle his head onto your lap and have you pet him into relaxation. You just look like such an angel, so pretty and so sweet where you sit, dressed in his gray hoodie that’s far too big and with a white, pleated tennis skirt. 

He’ll do that later, he promises himself, but first he has to get his workout in.

“Yeah,” he nods, pulling out the portable punching bag from the wall where it’s usually stored when not in use. “Can I put on some music or will it disturb you?” 

“Of course,” you smile, and Jeongguk nearly snorts but manages to keep his cool. He knows you’re not gonna do much reading anyway.

It takes him maybe a minute to scroll through spotify on his phone, all while you find where you left off last time. But when the rock music sounds from the speakers, he sees in the reflection of the dark, turned-off tv-screen how you peer over the pages.

As a warm up, Jeongguk brings out his jump rope and places himself on one of the yoga mats to dampen the sounds traveling to the downstairs neighbors.

It’s easy to say that you’re hypnotized.

You manage to half read, half observe as Jeongguk warms up with his jump rope, landing softly on the yoga mat he’s rolled out on the living room floor. It’s crazy how firm he is. 

His hair bounces, and his pecs do just a bit too since he’s tensing them, otherwise… he’s strong and firm and… mouth watering. His abs flex, and so do his arms, and his shoulders, and the way his veins start to pop more than usual just makes you crazy.

Instinctively, you lick your lips, thankful that Jeongguk doesn’t keep his attention on you. He jumps to the rhythm, sometimes higher and slower, other times he swings the rope quicker to do a double jump.

You don’t think he’d mind if you told him that you’re only in the room to observe and basically admire him, and definitely not to read, but you don’t want to disturb him.

He works up just a light sweat, and you have a hard time tearing your eyes from his glistening skin when he puts the rope away on the floor and positions himself before the punching bag. He’s already wrapped his hands like he does, and you bite your lip when he slides the black boxing gloves onto his hands and fastens them with his teeth. God.

Then, he starts.

You’ve been a writer almost your entire life. At least since you learned to form words by putting letters in different orders. You find them flowing almost excessively from your brain, able to convey just about any event or information you want and in any feeling.

But there aren’t enough words in any alphabet or in all of them combined, to describe Jeongguk and his bulging muscles. He punches the bag of sand, gives it a real beating, and your heart beats in a different kind of way. It’s the way his entire body works, how his abdomen tenses when he swings his arm, or how the muscles ripple in his back when he does those quick hits. Bam, bam, bam.

The hand holding the book rests uselessly in your lap, your finger firmly holding it open, but you can’t make yourself care all that much.

Jeongguk goes at it for a few minutes, until he suddenly stops to throw a glove off, bend down, and take a swig from his water bottle on the floor.

Then he turns to you, still breathing heavily, and smirks. You’re quick to raise the book again, pretending to read.

“Is it good?”

“Huh?”

“Your book?”

“Uh…”

“The one you always ‘read’ when I work out? But that you never seem to finish even though I know you can read like four hundred pages in a day, easy.”

Shit, you’ve been found out.

“Uh…”

“You know, you’re really not as innocent as you seem.”

So you drop the book beside you on the couch, not caring about losing your place because let’s be honest, whatever words you did read definitely weren’t absorbed by your brain in any way, shape, or form. 

“Okay, but you! cannot blame me!” you point your finger accusingly at a still smirking Jeongguk.

“Have you seen yourself? You should be happy I’m at least not all over you like I want to be. You know this is practically straight up porn?”

Jeongguk laughs, thoroughly amused as he turns back to fix something with the punching bag.

Despite always falling easily, you never thought you’d be this in love with someone. Yes, you can’t get enough of Jeongguk physically, but your love goes so, so much deeper than that. 

Taking one last look at his sweaty, bulging back, you rise to your feet.

“Hey,” you call for his attention, coming to stand next to him. Curious, he looks down at you just as you place your hand lightly on his shoulder, rubbing your thumb over his skin. “Do you wanna go out tonight? To eat, I mean? Do that thing where we don’t plan anything and just see where we end up?”

Jeongguk is still breathing heavily, but not as much as before, and he nods happily, “Sure.”

Excited and just honestly so incredibly happy, you shoot him a smile as you back away, your hand falling from his shoulder. “Leave at seven?”

“Wait, where are you going?” he grabs your wrist, confusion written all over his face.

“I thought I’d leave you to get your workout done in peace. And I might as well get some things done too.”  

“I didn’t say I wanted peace, though, did I?”

Before you can answer his mischief-reeking answer, he pulls you back, and you crash right into his sweaty body. By instinct, your hands land on his upper arms.

Like always, there’s an excited spark in your eyes. “No, but what if you need it?”

Jeongguk’s arm tightens its hold on your waist as he peers down at you with a certain kind of evil that you know very well by now, “What if I don’t? What if I want you to watch?”

“Gguk, you’re sweaty.”

He smirks, looking so confident you barely know what to do with yourself.

“I happen to know for a fact that you don’t mind getting my sweat all over you.”

“Oh?”

“Mhm. So, since you want to watch and I’m not done with my workout, why don’t we make this a little bit more interesting?”

You already know by his playful eyes that he’s up to no good, but before you can question it, Jeongguk steps forward while holding you so tightly that you trip backward. Of course, he doesn’t let you fall but lowers you smoothly to the floor.

Clueless, you search his face in an attempt at revealing his intentions, “What are you up to?”

“Already told you, I'm working out,” he gets into position above you, his still wrapped up hands on the yoga mat on either side of your face. “Soft enough?”

“Mhm,” you confirm.

Like always when Jeongguk shows how sweet and thoughtful he is, you can barely keep your hands and your love to yourself. But to your surprise, he catches your hand as it touches his cheek lovingly, and he lowers it.

“Uh, uh. No touching,” he teases, and your mouth falls open.

“What?”

It apparently brings him joy to see you both surprised and pouty because he chuckles.

“You heard me. You can watch, but you can’t touch.” 

“Oh, you’re cruel.”

Unsurprisingly, Jeongguk continues to laugh, amusement glimmering in his eyes. You had your guess as to what exercises he planned when he planted his knees between your legs and his hands beside your head, so it doesn’t come as much of a shock when he adjusts his weight to his feet (which he put your brick of a book under) and starts lowering himself.

“You can’t do this to me,” you complain with a pleading look, “you’re so close, within reach, but I can’t touch? I haven’t even hugged you since this morning, and you say I can’t even feel you up?”

Of course, having another person under you when you’re doing push-ups doesn’t call for the best result, and Jeongguk can’t get as low as he should to really get the most out of the exercise even with the added height of the book, but it doesn’t seem to bother him.

He moves so that his face stops just to the right of yours, and he’s just so close. Warmth is radiating from him, and it’s almost physically painful to not reach out.

At first, he doesn’t say anything, he just keeps his eyes on you with one brow raised. Giving him your absolute best, most devastating puppy eyes, you grin when he relents. “Twenty seconds. Use them well because after that, you can’t touch.”

Of course, it doesn’t take you longer than half a second to throw your arms around his neck and hug him best you can to your body. The force causes him to temporarily lose his balance, and he repositions again so that his weight is supported by his knees instead of his feet while you basically squeeze the life right out of him.

“Love you so much,” you gush quietly, and although he tries to act unaffected, you feel his chest shake with quiet laughter. “So, so much. My dream boy, so sweet. Wait, is feeling you up included?”

He smirks; you can tell even if you can’t see it, “You only have ten seconds left, though.”

“Evil, Gguk, evil.”

However, your boyfriend’s cruelty doesn’t stop you from taking advantage of whatever you can get, and so you trail your hands lower over his back. Just to be a little shit, Jeongguk adjusts his hands on the mat, and you know it’s only to give you an extra feel of his muscles rippling under your fingers.

This is all incredibly funny to him, especially when you can’t help but let out a groan. One of your arms remains around his neck, and you run the other hand over his upper arm, his side, and down his chest and stomach.

“Time’s up,” he declares.

“No,” you whine, clinging onto his neck. If you’re not mistaken, you think you hear him snort quietly.

“Yes. Now let go or I won’t let you watch anymore.”

“I don’t believe that. You said you wanted me to.”

You pout as Jeongguk supports himself on one hand, the other prying one of your arms from his neck and then the other all while somehow managing to still hold the first wrist. And chuckling, of course.

“You know, one might think you only love me for my body,” he smirks down at you, moving so that he’s gripping both of your sleeves in one hand over your head.

“Jeongguk, I take full offense by that. I would love you just as much even if you didn’t work out.”

“But you wouldn’t find me as attractive.”

It’s the way his eyes still shimmer with confidence that prevents you from going all serious in order to assure him that you absolutely would.

“I would. I admit that seeing you like… this… may, uh, influence me in some way, but that’s just biology, it’s short term, and it’s unreliable.”

“Biology, huh?” he teases, and it’s so hard to focus when he’s above you, looking like that. His hair is starting to grow out again and the black strands have a slight wave to them as they’ve collected some of his perspiration. 

You’re almost thankful for his hold on your sleeves because his skin is too tempting, too warm and soft, and just a bit sweaty, covering the solid muscles underneath. 

The worst part, however, is of course his face. Jeongguk is smiling a charismatic, lopsided smirk that has more than your heart throbbing, and his eyes convey happiness and love, no matter if he makes a half-assed attempt at seeming stern. 

There’s no trace of fear of hesitancy anywhere, something you don’t pay much attention to at the moment, but a pattern you’ve definitely started to notice over time.

You gaze up at him somewhat longingly, “Yeah. Monkey brain, you know? It sees muscles and goes ‘strong man, make baby.’”

Jeongguk’s smirk widens into a grin, “Just any ‘strong man?’”

“No, just you. So maybe it’s more like, ‘strong, sweet man, let him impregnate.’”

“Impregnate, huh? Are you trying to turn me on?”

“No,” you inspect his face, looking for hints, “Are you? Turned on?”

Dramatically, he shakes his head, “No. Definitely not.”

After that, Jeongguk resumes his push-ups, concentrating just a little bit harder since he’s basically only using one hand. The other, still gripping your sleeves over your head, pretty much only aids his balance.

He doesn’t look at your face, although you’re certain he can see the dreamy expression on it from the corner of his eye.

“You’re so handsome, did you know that?” you gush lovingly.

“Yes.”

“And so sweet. At least most of the time.”

“I know.”

“Do you also know that you make my heart race?”

“Yes.”

He can’t stop his smile when you exhale out of frustration. 

“Gguk, I can’t believe you’re doing this to me,” you complain, wiggling around on the mat.

“You got to touch like two minutes ago.”

“Yes, but it’s not enough?”

“Sucks,” he offers nonchalantly on his way down. 

So, you decide to switch tactics.

You lower your voice, taking on just a hint of seduction. “I know you want it, though.”

And to your satisfaction, you see him glance at your face even if he doesn’t falter, so you continue. 

“You like being touched just as much. And to touch.”

“Do I?” he grunts, and you can tell the exercise is starting to get to him.

“Mhm. Just think about it… My fingers in your hair, my nails on your back… My hand on your co–”

“You can try to dirty talk all you want, I’m not giving in this time,” he interrupts.

Honestly, you don’t doubt that he’d accept his defeat if you chose to continue because just like you, you know Jeongguk craves physical touch, and there’s only so much he can take before he caves.

But again, you change your plan.

This time, you manage to wiggle one hand free from his grip.

“I’m not gonna touch,” you assure when he gives you a warning look. 

Luckily, you’re only wearing a soft bralette type of top underneath your gray hoodie (which is Jeongguk’s, actually) and it makes it easy to first slowly pull the fabric up to your chin and then, well aware of Jeongguk’s gaze, the top.

He stops doing his push-ups, frozen with his arms straight. “What do you think you’re doing?”

“Nothing. But just know, since I can’t touch you, I’m not sure you’re allowed to touch me, either.”

His narrowed eyes are incredibly comedic, and it takes everything in you not to laugh out loud.

Innocently, you trace your fingers lightly over your skin, from your stomach up to your exposed breasts. Your left nipple hardens when you circle it a few times, and you definitely hear Jeongguk groan quietly.

“What was that?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

But funnily enough, he shuts his eyes tightly before he goes back to his push-ups. 

And your heart hurts with endearment, and it’s so fucking hard to not rip your other hand free from his hold and throw your arms around his neck to kiss him absolutely silly.

Taking it a bit further, you reach your free hand down to your skirt and pull it up around your waist. Carefully, without touching Jeongguk even as he moves, you place your left foot against the mat, your bent knee close to his hip.

“You’re up to something, aren’t you? Trying to make my workout fail?”

“No,” you lie sweetly. “But I do know another way for you to work out.”

“Does that involve fucking you, perhaps?” he asks nonchalantly, but you can taste the building arousal in the words, and you know that you’re not the only one starting to get affected.

“I don’t know, maybe?”

Of course, it does. 

“What was that?”

“My hand.”

“You’re breaking the rules,” he informs, opening his eyes to look down at you.

But you’ve still got your tits out, and you watch as Jeongguk’s eyes lower and he licks his lips.

So, you smile innocently, “Technically, you’re the one who’s touching me. I’m just holding my hand here, and you’re putting your stomach against it.”

“You think you’re gonna get away with this?”

“Yes, because you can just choose not to touch my hand.”

Just as the words leave your mouth, Jeongguk lowers himself again, his flexing stomach bumping into your hand.

“Or you could be a good girl and follow the rules.”

“Oh, but I am a good girl. All I want is to show you how much I love you, but you’re not letting me. Yet, I’m still following your rules and not touching. You’re the one who’s being bad because you know how good it would feel to let me touch you. You know how bad you want it and that you’re gonna give in sooner or later because, although you’re strong, you’re not that strong.”

He doesn’t respond to that. At least not with more than narrowed eyes that tell you he knows just as well as you do that he’s a weak man when it comes to you and your touch.

When he descends next, your hand is lower on his stomach. Every time, your fingers creep lower, inching closer and closer to his black workout shorts.

Until you touch them, and Jeongguk falters in his movement. You trace your fingers slowly along the waistband, reveling in how his push-ups seem to slow too.

“Tired?” you ask Jeongguk, who’s breathing heavily.

“No, I’m just gonna do a bit of planking.”

You watch as he lowers himself to his elbows, but the thing is that he becomes so close that there just isn’t enough space between your bodies. You feel his chest against your exposed skin and his hip against the inside of your raised thigh.

“Didn’t think we we’re supposed to be touching,” you tease into his right ear, honestly loving the feeling of his chest against yours. 

“No, but we’ll just have to manage.”

He’s not putting any weight on you. Except for something you feel against your hand that rests on your lower stomach. 

Briefly, you bite your lip, “You’re hard.”

“Am I?”

“I’d say so,” you confirm as you let your fingers explore over the slippery fabric. 

At first, you trace the outline of his hard cock as best you can, absolutely loving how it makes Jeongguk’s stomach flinch and his breath shake next to your ear when you apply just a bit of pressure.

“And to think I was considered the fuckboy,” Jeongguk mumbles, and you nearly snort.

“You’re saying you consider me a fuckboy?”

“Sorry, a fuckgirl.”

You grin, “Jeongguk, I’m not nearly as experienced as you are. Then nor now.”

He repositions himself back up onto his hands, thus lifting his body off yours with a strained grunt, “Could’ve fooled me. You have this innocence about you, but you’re truly just a little vixen.”

Although already missing the heat of him against you, you allow him to move away from your hand, letting it lie on your stomach. A memory comes flooding back, making you smile as you admire his face above yours.

“I guess I was the one who did it, then?”

Jeongguk is reasonably confused by your words, raising his eyebrow before he switches the hand that holds your sleeve captive.

“Huh?” he questions as he dips down to continue his push-ups, now supporting himself mostly with his other arm.

“Captured your heart.”

On his way up, he stops. You can almost see the way it clicks in his mind, and you think about how the time you spent together in college was so short yet so important that every little word, every little touch or gesture has been ingrained in the both of you.

“Yeah,” he agrees, a small but fond smile pulling on his lips. “Which was for the best anyway. I wouldn’t know what to do with it.”

Before you can react, your brain still processing the heart clenching words, Jeongguk leans down and quickly pecks your mouth.

You must be such a sight to see, lying with your tits out, hand captive beside your head, and puppy eyes directed at the man above you.

Wanting to tell him how he’s had your heart in possession for a very long time now and–besides accidentally squeezing it a little too hard once or twice–has done a very good job at keeping it safe, you lift your free hand.

However, you only feel Jeongguk’s soft but a bit sweaty hair between your fingers for a very short moment before he sits back on his knees and removes your hand.

“No touching,” he smirks gleefully.

You gasp, “But you just touched!”

“I definitely did not, I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

In stark contrast to his words, Jeongguk leans down once more, this time with his focus set on your right breast. He places a wet, open mouthed kiss on your nipple, taking it into his mouth and sucking on it briefly before giving it a quick but so, so gentle bite.

It’s over before you know it, your little devil of a boyfriend gazing down at you expectantly.

Well, that surely means that the game is on.

“No touching, huh?” 

“Absolutely not.”

“Okay, if you say so,” you agree innocently, although you’d be surprised if Jeongguk actually bought it. “Continuing with the push-ups?”

“Yeah.”

Smiling at him, you watch as he begins again.

It’s quiet for a few seconds, the tension growing as you stare at each other, both knowing that the ball is truly in motion.

Amused, you place your free hand on your chest, and you almost break out in laughter at the vision of Jeongguk’s eyes following your fingers. 

Gently and slowly, you trace your nipple like you did earlier, noticing how he for a moment seemingly forgets what he was doing and pauses.

Clearing your throat, Jeongguk snaps out of it and despite resuming his exercise, his gaze is still zeroed in on your hand.

So you move it. Incredibly, painfully slowly, you glide your hand sensually down your stomach until it disappears from view.

Due to the angle of Jeongguk’s body, he can feel your hand against his crotch every time he dips, but you’re not focused on touching him at the moment.

It takes a bit of skill and timing, but soon enough, you manage to lower your panties enough to kick them off with your legs. 

“You know where my hand is, right?”

What feels even better than the feeling of your middle finger carefully circling your clit is the look on Jeongguk’s face. 

He tries so hard to act indifferent as he grunts a “I have my suspicions,” but you know he’s suffering.

You wait until he’s got his face right next to yours before delivering a whisper.

“I’m really wet.”

“Oh? And how does that concern me?”

“Because it’s your fault.”

“Is it?”

“Yeah, so you should do something about it.”

“I thought I wasn’t allowed to touch either?”

“Didn't seem to stop you before?”

“Excuse me, miss, are you implying that I’m unable to follow rules?”

You almost laugh out loud at how he’s pretending he didn’t just suck on your tit. “Yes.”

He scoffs, “You’re wrong. And I’m busy here, actually.”

“Oh, okay. So you don’t mind if I get myself off here, by myself then?”

For a split second, Jeongguk falters, but he’s quick to regain his composure.

“I mean, that’s very disrespectful of you, but who am I to stop you?”

“How kind of you. I might have to reward you for that.”

“Reward me? I don’t need a reward.”

“No? I was thinking about… maybe letting you have a taste? You don’t want that?”

Jeongguk goes quiet, and you know that he really wants to keep his act up, keep the game going, but can he? Eating you out is probably on his top three list of things in life.

“Just imagine this… me giving you, say, half an hour to do exactly what you please. My thighs around your head…”

You watch as he gulps, and you almost feel sorry for him. Almost. 

“And it’s right there, just for you… I know you like to take your time, and I know you’d really want to make me come on your tongue again and again, even if I’m sensitive. Feel my thighs start to shake? Hear my breathy moans of your name? My fingers pulling on your hair?”

You continue to smile as he struggles to keep a neutral face, and you know very well that he’s imagining your every word.

“Or if you don’t want that, you could fuck me.”

“I already told you” he huffs, “I’m busy over here.”

“Sucks. I guess I’ll have to do everything myself.”

“Yeah, help yourself.”

Jeongguk resumes his push-ups only to go still the next moment. “What do you think you’re doing, miss?” he gazes down at you with a raised eyebrow.

“I’m helping myself? But I’m not touching so don’t worry,” you grin, feeling his cock twitch under your fingers.

Grunting, Jeongguk shuts his eyes tightly, and you’re left marveling at him above you. “‘Not touching?’ I can feel you touching me, honey.”

Like before, you rub him a few times over the fabric of his shorts, but soon enough, your fingers venture below the waistband. 

“I have no idea what you’re talking about, honey. Are you saying I can’t follow rules?”

“Yes, that’s exactly what I’ve been trying to say, a–actually,” he stutters endearingly when you grip him in your hand, only to find that his tip is already wet with precum.

Caught up in the feeling and overall atmosphere, neither of you say anything for a couple of seconds. You keep exploring his cock–a part of him that you know like the back of your hand by now–running your hand up and down in a manner that could definitely be considered teasing.

Until it hits you that according to Jeongguk’s game, he shouldn’t be enjoying it as much as he currently is, which is gently and barely noticeably thrusting his hips into your hand. You pause, your hand stilling around him.

“You know, you don’t look very busy,” you tease. “I thought you were supposed to be working out?”

Giving you a glare that consists of equal parts fondness and frustration, Jeongguk narrows his eyes. He doesn’t say anything, just shakes his head in pretend disappointment.

But he does go back to his workout, only giving you a curious look as you keep your hold on him. 

It’s almost laughable the way he starts to complain about you tricking him, ‘pretending to be a sweet girl when really you’re not,’ and ‘all you want is for him to suffer but luckily, he’s a strong-minded person, always in control of his desires.’ 

To be fair, you do laugh at that. Just like you laugh at how he–while you’re in the middle of lowering his shorts to underneath his balls and taking his cock out–mumbles something about how he’d never let ‘some vixen like you deflower him before marriage.’

Still, he does his push-ups smoothly, even when you stroke him, so you’ll have to give him that.

Until you lower yourself just a bit along his body and wait for him to be as close as possible to drag his head along your slit. He coughs then, blinking down at you otherwise motionlessly. “Are you trying to deflower me?”

“No. Absolutely not. I’m just helping myself,” you shrug innocently.

While Jeongguk keeps his suspicious gaze on you the entire time he’s able to, he allows you to set up a nice pace where every time he descends, you drag his hard cock up your slit, coating it in your arousal.

Although, it’s not as if he’s unaffected, because his teeth have got quite a hold on his bottom lip, obviously in order to keep himself quiet. 

Someone not being quiet is you. Well, you wouldn't describe yourself as loud, but with Jeongguk as close as he is, he hears every little sigh and moan of his name as you rub him against your clit.

“Such a shame you don’t want to touch,” you breathe, your chest heaving almost as much as Jeongguk’s.

It feels so good, and you can feel how he’s adjusting his movement, adding just a bit of thrust to his hips.

“It’s such a shame, because I’m really, really wet. So wet that even something big could slip right in.”

Teasing him, you hold the slippery head of his cock right at your entrance for a moment before you continue to rub it up to your clit. 

You repeat the action about seven times, Jeongguk slowing his movement every time you hold him there.

But on the eighth time you spend three seconds just circling the head against your hole. You’ve closed your eyes and leaned your head back, enjoying both the feeling of him and knowing he’s enjoying it too (and suffering a bit).

Although the initial goal of the act, you’re caught by surprise–a loud gasp leaving you–when he abruptly pushes in.

It’s not that he was rough, but you can definitely feel the desperation to be inside, and it’s evident in the groan he lets out. He stops then like he always does in order to make sure you’re not hurting.

“Look what you made me do,” he huffs, booping his nose against yours before continuing to complain. “Sabotaging my workout on top of deflowering me.”

You chuckle, raising your free hand to caress his shoulder, a well-known gesture for him by now that you’re okay and he can keep going.

Pulling out halfway, he thrusts back in, making you both moan.

“I didn’t do anything, you’re just weak.”

“I know, but at least let me pretend.”

Having fully abandoned his game, Jeongguk finally releases your other hand, and you waste no time.

“Does this mean I can touch?”

Seeing the excitement on your face, Jeongguk snorts. “As if you’ve done anything but touch? Besides, I’m literally balls deep in you; I’d say we’re already touching.”

“I take that as a ‘yes,’ though,” you grin and wrap both your arms around his neck.

He laughs, and you can feel his chest shake with it.

“Although this is super hot, maybe we should move? This mat isn’t very thick, and I don’t want you to get hurt.”

Despite feeling him slip out of you, your heart beats in excitement, and you nod. Oh, to be loved by him.

“Okay, hold on tightly!”

You do as you’re told, tightening your arms around his neck and grinning when he somehow manages to get up with you in his arms. 

Immediately, he steers the two of you toward the bedroom.

“Sorry for sabotaging your workout,” you apologize meekly, still grinning so hard your cheeks hurt. “Do you know when the gym will be finished?”

“Look, I thought we went over this already. One, you have my explicit permission to touch me anywhere and anytime, and if, for some reason I’m not feeling it, I’ll let you know. But trust me, you’ll understand. Two, I’d rather do literally anything with you than… well, anything without you.”

You know that. A while ago, you spoke about boundaries. And it ended with you both agreeing that there basically are none. Well, you agreed that you both trust each other to only ever touch when you wholeheartedly believe the other wants it, and to talk about it if you’re unsure or want to try something new. It’s the entire reason you acted so freely.

Dropping you onto the bed, you watch as he removes his shorts entirely, and you follow suit, pulling the hoodie over your head.

“Besides, I think I broke some kind of world record for most push-ups done. God, I’m gonna be so sore tomorrow,” you pout, amused at how he whines and rubs at his left tricep.

“I’ll make it better,” you assure, because you always do when he’s tired and sore, a well-cherished routine by now. “Also, entirely un-horny, but you’re so cool; it’s so impressive that you can even do them on one hand like that.”

“Keep the skirt on,” he pleads when you go to remove it, and you roll your eyes but obey. “And thank you.”

“Okay, well are you just gonna stand there or are you gonna fuck me?”

“Oh, I’m definitely gonna fuck you, do you know how insane I am right now, I’m literally half a second away from losing my last screw and going entirely bonkers.”

<previous | next>

author's note: please tell me what you thought!!

tag lists: had to remove the tags when editing

#evolution of a lover’s heart

[ittomi]

rough edges pt. 16 (m)

pairing: jungkook | reader genre: college!au, badboy!jk word count: 16k warnings: mentions of death, drugs, executions, drinking, unprotected sex, anxiety. 

a/n: we’re at the beginning of the end! thank you for waiting <3

1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 6.5 / 7 / 8 / 9 / 10 / 11 / 12 / 13 / 14 / 15 / part 16 / masterlist

RE asks tag / pinterest board

The atmosphere in the office is tense as it has ever been. Long shifts, overtime eating hours off everyone’s rest. The entire bullpen smells of coffee, the one thing everyone has been surviving on. Seokjin pours himself another serving, this time into a large tumbler. 

Continua a leggere

#rough edges

[ittomi]

the art of trying | jjk (m)

>>pairing: jungkook x reader / dilf!jk x grocery store clerk!oc

>>genre: friends with benefits, smut, angst

>>word count: 29.3k 😁

>>warnings: dom jk, sub oc, age gap, oc club era 🪩🥂, oc heart to heart with…, enter mr park seojoon !!, budding friendships 🥰, mending of relationships, enter dilf !!, reconciliation finally, but still we yearn, and jk is still a little stewpid, however!! he is doing his best!!, mostly oc pov i think, warning for a little bit of sad bc she is sad !!, but not too sad 😼, enter jock !!, dilf jk stuff: asking for permission, saying thank u, etc., fore play in the form of a lil dry humping 🫶🏻, finishes (multiple),, oral (m & f), dirty talk, lovesick gross smitteness 👎🏻, jreampie 👍🏻,  and finally, enter nari !! (🧋)

>>notes: finally am i right 🤣

this is part of my dilf jk series that can be found on my masterlist

>>summary: you’re trying to forget jungkook, but he’s trying to make sure you remember why you shouldn’t. 

Continua a leggere

#the art of wanting

[ittomi]

25 | Legends of Darlaria

⨰ summary: You wake up amidst a war with no recollection of your past. Faced with suspicion and distrust, you struggle to assimilate into a foreign nation—otherwise known as your home. But on your enlightening journey to search for your identity, you come face to face with the General of the Army.

⨰ pairing/rating: yoongi x reader & jungkook x reader | PG-15

⨰ genre: 70% angst, 30% fluff | war!au & magic!au

⨰ warnings: profanity, mention of death

⨰ wordcount: 4.4k

⨰ join the taglist! (pm/send in an ask/reply/reblog)

⨰ previous | series m.list | next

⧖⧗Circa Saphh⧗⧖

Where did he go wrong?

He and Lieutenant Ki had once been so close. They assumed their positions of power at the same time. They learned from each other, grew together as well. Hell, he looked up to her. She taught him the value of each individual soldier. She taught him how to use empathy in a war. She taught him never to treat anyone like a pawn on a gameboard. So why did she use him? Did she lie when years ago she confessed that she regretted ever thinking she could be a better leader than him? Had she always been waiting for the right time to swoop in? 

It’s true that their friendship dwindled ever since she became his lieutenant, but he always thought it was because they were attempting to keep things professional. He always thought it was because she didn’t want to cross the line after Doyun left. Was it really because she resented him? And now that she’s one step closer to becoming the General of the Solarian Army, she can’t take his bullshit that she endured for years? 

Threatening usurpation, for fuck’s sake! Even he admits he had been a blundering, stubborn fool, but she didn’t have to involve the whole army. She didn’t have to involve you.

He’s been back in the officer meetings, where everything feels the same: the repeating codes, the battle plans, the arguments. Nothing has changed. Yet, he feels out of place. He feels as if the little authority he had is gone. He wonders if his own officers deem him pathetic. He wonders if they secretly wish he had stepped down to let Lieutenant Ki take the reins. He even wonders if they wished he died when he was lying there, immobile in his tent.

He can’t trust anyone anymore.

Not like he trusted Doyun. 

He soon realizes no one has called him by his name in a long, long time. Doyun was the only one who had the guts to do it; she had always seen him outside of his identity as the Solarian General. But she’s dead now and there’s no one left to see him as who he really is: Yoongi. Just plain Yoongi. The one who is a medium of all four elements, not just fire. The one who used to cry a lot. The one who would rather be scolded by his mother than rat out those who’d caused trouble. The one who never wanted power but was forced to take it because of his bloodline.

But maybe there’s still hope. Because with you, he feels safe. Because other than the fact that you address him with honorifics, you make him feel like he is just like any other Solarian in the nation. Because with you, he knows that even if he were stripped from his title, you’d stay by his side. So maybe he can trust you too. You’d already apologized to him after all. Just three days after the threat, you’d barged into his tent in near hysterics, telling him that you miscalculated and that you’re ashamed of yourself and that you should’ve been there for him instead of plotting behind his back. But he was never angry at you in the first place. There was nothing to forgive. He knew the threat wasn’t your idea. 

What he had really been anticipating was Lieutenant Ki’s apology. But it never came. She simply pretends as if nothing happened. As if she didn’t casually threaten to turn his soldiers against him if she didn’t get his way. How much does she look down on him for her to be so brazen? It frustrates him. He’s not perfect, but he still deserves an ounce of respect from his own lieutenant.

He hates himself for getting so caught up in Lieutenant Ki’s betrayal like this. Since when did he have an ego? Since when had he gotten so stubborn? He tries to channel his energy into making sure you won’t lose your life out there. He often supervises your training and nitpicks everything about it. He decides to create the battle plans three weeks in advance to prepare. Then, he makes you go over the battles over and over and over again. He secretly wishes you perform badly just so he can rescind his approval with good reason. But he’s seen your skills; you’re no average fire medium anymore. The passion you have for Solaria, for everything you believe in has only grown since you reconnected with the spirits of fire. He knows deep inside that after the first one, you’ll be going to battles regularly.

It terrifies him.

He can’t remember the last time someone died from something other than a battle wound. 

⧖⧗Circa Opal⧗⧖

The moon is dim today, but that only allows for the stars to shine brighter. You stare up into the sky, nestled in front of Heli, petting his warm fur and thinking to yourself. It’s a chilly night tonight, but the winds that flutter the leaves of the trees at the edge of the forest don’t really bother you. Instead, it’s peaceful. When you close your eyes, you feel like you’re lazily drifting away into the night, floating up and up until you’re resting amongst the stars. It’s a good feeling.

“May I join you?”

Your eyes flutter open, heart already leaping in your chest. 

It’s him.

“Of course,” you say, moving over a bit so he has room to sit in Heli’s warmth. The fire tiger welcomes him with a small huff. He situates himself right next to you—close enough that you can see him quite well despite the darkness, but not too close so that you’re touching. You haven’t talked to him privately since you apologized to him. You’re unsure if that’ll make this conversation awkward—if a conversation even happens, that is. The General seems completely fine with being silent. So are you.

He’s been watching over you for the past several weeks. You can tell that he’s worried by the way he nitpicks your every move and has you coming over to his tent nearly every day to go over the battle plans again. It’s a little endearing to see how much he cares. But it’s all the more pressure for you to come back completely unscathed. 

“You’ll get to see war tomorrow,” comes his soft voice. “I hope you’re not too scared.”

“I am a little bit,” you admit. “But I’m more afraid of what will happen if I were to perform inadequately.” You turn to him, a teasing smile on your face. “I’m terrified that I won’t meet your expectations.”

“What a strange fear,” he says. “Most soldiers are afraid of death. You seem to be afraid of me.”

You laugh. “I suppose I am.”

“Do you recall the battle plans for tomorrow?”

You grin, nodding your head. “I could rewrite them with my eyes closed.”

“Good, good,” he replies. “So don’t wander off.”

“I won’t,” you say. “But I can’t promise that I’ll always be in your line of vision, either. I don’t want you worrying about me on the battlefield. You should only be worrying about yourself.”

He just hums. “I’ve done this a thousand times over; I think I’ll be fine. I just don’t want you to come back traumatized.”

“I think I’ll be fine, too,” you say. “Technically, I’ve done this before. Maybe my instincts will kick in. And… and maybe being on the battlefield will jog my lost memory.”

“Possibly,” he answers. “But do you want your memories to return?”

“If you asked me just a year ago, I would’ve hesitated and then said ‘yes.’ But now… Now I think I’ve moved on. This feels like my life now.” You scratch behind Heli’s ear, which makes him purr happily. “I no longer want to be the person I was before. Who I am now matters so much more.”

He nods. “I agree.”

“I don’t want you to overexert yourself tomorrow, though,” you say. “It would be your first battle since your injury.”

“I’ll be fine,” he says. Then, he grins a shit-eating grin. It’s something that you rarely see on him, but something you’d like to see more of. “Weren’t you the one who told me to worry only about yourself?”

You scoff. “Well, yes, but…”

“Then let’s stick to your advice,” the General says. “Let tomorrow be a mystery to us both.”

“A mystery,” you repeat. “I’m not sure if I enjoy mysteries.”

“I find that hard to believe,” the General replies in his quiet voice. “Tomorrow is a mystery. Overmorrow is a mystery. The day after overmorrow is a mystery as well. Is it not that our entire lives are just a mystery unfolding?”

You turn to the General in surprise. “I never thought about it like that. I suppose I was wrong, then. You do make quite a good point.”

“Why thank you,” he answers with an endearing smile that seems to warm you from the inside.

There’s a few seconds of silence before you decide to speak again: “Are you scared? For tomorrow?”

“Am I scared?” He cocks his head. “Only that you’ll be out there with me.”

You laugh. “I promise I won’t get hurt.”

He only raises his eyebrows. “If only it was something you can control,” he sighs. “All I can do is wish you luck tomorrow, my officer.”

Your face feels warm, although the breeze has become quite chilly over the course of the conversation. Even small moments like these are enough to send you over the moon. Small moments when he glances at you when he thinks you’re not looking. Small moments when he calls you his officer. Small moments when he shows how much he worries. After finally having gotten your way through an unforgivable threat, you thought you were walking on thin ice; instead, he’s been kinder than ever. It makes your heart clench just thinking about it, and you wonder more often these days how things would’ve turned out if it hadn’t been for the damned war.

“I wish you luck too, sir,” you say.

He just nods, closing his eyes and letting the night breeze caress his cheeks and brush aside his dark hair. You do the same, allowing your other senses to heighten. You hear Heli’s soft purs, the whispering wind, the soft crackles of the fire tiger’s flames. You can smell the freshness of the nearby forest, the crispness of the night air and the familiar scent of the General as well. 

As the two of you sit comfortably side by side, feeling tomorrow’s battle looming over your shoulders, you realize you wouldn’t mind a good mystery. Even if uncertainty makes you nervous, you are certain about one thing: there’s more to come from your relationship with the General. Who knows? Maybe one day you’ll finally call him by his name. And he, yours.

You toss and turn in your sleep the whole night, and by the time you wake up, it feels as if you haven’t slept at all. As you untangle your blankets from your legs, you think that maybe you are subconsciously scared. It’s a battle, for Sooht’s sake, and the last time you went to one of these, you came back with broken ribs and a wiped memory. 

But you shouldn’t be scared, right? Not when Suhyun and Nayoon have told you that you’re more than ready. Not when you know the General will keep you in his peripheral vision and stop at nothing to ward off danger. Still, you’re nervous. Death makes you uncomfortable. Pain does too. What if you shut down on the battlefield? What if you freeze? What if you crumble? And worst of all, what if you feel pity for the enemy?

The Darlaeans are still humans, even though they feel too monstrous to be so sometimes. You don’t think anything could force you to kill one of them. The worst you’ll do is inflict injuries, but of course not fatally. The mission is to gain ground, not kill everyone in your path. But the mission often gets muddled amidst the anger, the frustration, the blood and the dead. You’re scared that you’ll get caught up in a fight of hatred when you should really be fighting for freedom.

But you digress. Maybe you’re overthinking this. Or maybe this is something that should be overthought. You just hope that the casualties are low today and the General comes back home safely.

When you finally manage to rise from your cot, you nearly step on the container that Joon had made for you three years ago. From your turbulent “sleep,” you must’ve knocked it out of its hiding place. Settling down on your straw mat, you reach for the container.

It almost feels like the spirits have orchestrated this very moment. 

Just yesterday you talked about your desire to never remember your forgotten memories. So what about the necklace? If it’s the only relic of a past that you don’t want to remember, should you dispose of it? Is this a sign? To get rid of it before you fight for your nation? Or… are the spirits trying to tell you to wear it once more?

It’s true that you were wearing it when you woke up three years ago in the medical tent, confused, in pain and terrified, but still alive. In a way, the necklace could very much be a good luck charm. So should you wear it to this battle, too? To make sure you get out safely, for the General’s sake?

You seem to answer your own question, already taking the necklace out of its case. It’s more beautiful than you remember. Simple, but elegant. The white gem sparkles even though no light shines upon it. And for some reason, you feel comfort holding it so close to you; warmth spreads through your body, making the ends of your fingers and toes tingle. But maybe you’re just imagining it.

Nevertheless, you bring the necklace up close to examine it, running your fingers along the chain and admiring the dainty clasp. You almost forget what’s waiting for you later in the day while you marvel at its beauty. But someone reminds you just in time.

They clear their throat outside of your tent. “You can back out now before it’s too late, Officer.”

You smile, shaking your head. “What was that, sir? I can’t hear you from outside my tent.”

You can hear his playful sigh. There’s a bit of a rustle, and then he’s entering the space. “I said, Officer, you can back out now—” He halts mid-sentence, staring at the necklace in your hands, his expression suddenly unreadable. 

“O-Oh, this?” you say, a little uneasy at his reaction. “I… I had it on me when I woke up three years ago. I’ve been keeping it safe all this time, but I realized it’s sort of my good luck charm. I was thinking of wearing it today.”

To your relief, the General nods, his eyes softening. “I’m sorry. I was just surprised I never saw you wear it before. It’s beautiful.”

“Thank you,” you say, lifting up the necklace to admire it more closely. “Can you… can you help me put it on?”

“Yes,” he answers. “Of course.”

You move your hair out of your way, turning your back towards him as he approaches you slowly. You hold your breath as he gently places the necklace around your neck, his fingers warm and tender as he locks the clasp. Even when he lets go, he is careful, doing it carefully so that you’re not jarred by the coldness of the chain. And even when he lets go, his fingers linger as if he doesn’t ever want to pull away. “A fancy good luck charm, isn’t it?” he whispers, though you’re not sure why.

For some reason, you whisper back, “I suppose it is.”

You can feel his warmth on your back—or maybe you’re just imagining it. He’s so unbelievably close. You freeze when you feel his fingers caress your hair. All too soon, you’re holding your breath again. Is time speeding up or slowing down? You can’t quite tell. And as he gently covers the clasp of your necklace with the locks of your hair, you close your eyes and let out a shaky breath. He feels so close. This feels intimate.

You don’t know if you should speak, for what would you comment on? You’re afraid of ruining the moment, breaking the trance that both of you are seemingly in. But then he speaks for you.

“I trust you,” he whispers.

You blink. He trusts you? Out of all the things he could’ve said… he trusts you? You turn around and find him staring at you, black eyes swimming with an emotion you can’t quite discern. But after several seconds, he shakes his head, face reverting back to his stoic expression. “Gather your soldiers, Officer,” he says. “The trek to the second sector will take two hours.”

He leaves as swiftly as he had arrived, and you’re left alone in your tent, watching the red curtains flutter. He’d left so quickly that you didn’t even get a chance to tell him that you trust him too. Not that he doesn’t already know. 

 The two-hour trek feels too long.

As the Solarians began winning the war, it’s been taking a longer time to get to the battlefields—a tribute to all of the gained territory. What used to take an hour has doubled. It’s a good thing, perhaps. A sign that the end of the war can come, and in Solaria’s favor. 

You walk next to Captain Kim Sebin, who still mostly keeps to themselves. Their face is unreadable and frankly a little solemn. You don’t want to be invasive, so you keep silent. Besides, what would you talk about while marching toward a battle? ‘Oh, look how nice the weather is! In a few moments, we’ll be massacring hundreds and hoping we won’t die!’

In front of you is Hyojung, who, upon the General’s insistence, will be fighting solely on Zeru. The air horse trots across the terrain, head held high and wispy tail swishing confidently from side to side. He turns his head back every once in a while, though, to see if Hyojung is faring well. While the second sector major’s legs have made a decent recovery in the last two years, she still has difficulty running. To hide her liability on the battlefield, she gets to fight on horseback, which is usually reserved for the General.

But the General never seems to mind. In fact, it’s much rarer to see him on Zeru’s back when leaving for or returning home from the battlefield. “The injured need it more than I do,” is what he always says. So he walks by Hyojung and Zeru’s side, leading the rest of the second sector soldiers to the battlefield. 

Behind you, the soldiers are chatting about. With the battle being in such low stakes, most of them don’t seem too nervous. After all, some of them have been doing this for much longer than you have. You try to keep your mind numb. You try to focus on the ground underneath your shoes. You focus on the tiny blades of grass that have sprouted arbitrarily along the dirt terrain. You focus on the weather, the heavy feel of the air, the light taste of the wind.

And soon, you reach the battlegrounds. 

There is fog in the sky today. When you squint across the land, you can see glimpses of the Darlaeans—their legs, some parts of their torsos—but their faces have been obscured. 

What an eerie sight.

You place a hand on your racing heart to calm it down. 

Deep breaths. Deep breaths.

Next to you, Captain Kim begins to sort the soldiers into formation. They wordlessly turn to you, expecting you to do the same. So you begin issuing orders, trying to hide your shaking hands behind your back. Someone puts a warm hand on your shoulder.

“Good luck.”

It’s Hyojung. She gives you a supportive smile, and even Zeru paws at the ground and lets out a small whinny. You nod. “You too.”

You watch from the front of the lines as the General steps forward. How terrifying would it be to be at the very front, leading a battle? To be the first person that everybody wants to target? How terrifying is it to stand there alone, with no one to protect you? 

From the other side, you see a tall figure standing in front of the Darlaean army. The Forgotten Kingdom’s General. The fog envelops their body, hiding away everything except for their shiny black boots. Leather. Your soldiers have warned you about this; the Darlaeans kill innocent cattle and exploit their hide, their meat, their bones. It’s quite disgusting and even thinking of it makes you shudder. How can they be so cruel? You also catch a glimpse of the Darlaean General’s long cape, the ends of it fluttering in the breeze. How ostentatious.

The two Generals stand in solitude, and for a long minute, it feels like a waiting game. Who will make the first call? Who will begin the fighting, the death, the pain? The tension makes you nervous, and your hand instinctively flies up to palm at the diamond pendant underneath the collar of your uniform. 

“Hey.” You turn your head slightly to see that your co-captain is talking to you. “Don’t be so nervous,” they said. “You’ll be fine.”

You give them a weak smile. “Thanks.”

But your legs are shaking against your will. Your hands have become so sweaty and clammy that you wonder if you’ll even be able to wield fire with them. Why weren’t you this nervous the night before? Why are you in a near-panic state now?

You know why.

Because this feels so real. And a part of it… it feels familiar too. Somewhere in your mind, you know that you’ve lived this moment before, standing on the battlefield, nervous, with your hand placed on top of the pendant of your necklace. Screaming, crying, wailing, cracking, slicing—you hear it all in your head. Your eyes are seconds away from glazing over, from dissociating, but then you see a vivid purple streak in the air. It’s bright, so bright that it pierces through the fog and manages to blind you for a split second. 

“It’s starting,” you hear whispers from behind you. 

“That was the cue.”

And sure enough, the General answers with a roaring flame that shoots from his fingertips and soars straight up and across the empty field. Scarlet red intertwines with deep violet and they explode together in the murky gray sky. Your heart seems to stop beating.

You hear the valiant cries of soldiers from both sides. You hear the thunderous footsteps of those advancing the terrain. You see your own two feet beginning to carry you forward. You hear your own breath—a little too loudly. And your heart beats too quickly in your chest. 

But there’s a part of you that is glad to be here. A part of you that is proud. You fought for this. You want to be here. 

You can see them now. The Darlaeans. Their murderous faces, their black uniforms, their outstretched arms.

It’s terrifying. They look like they want to kill you.

You’re falling behind. 

Soldiers before you in the lineup are already throwing fire at the enemy. Some are dodging the Darlaean’s metal spheres. Others are sprawled on the ground, crawling away or not moving at all. The ground becomes tainted in red. But instead of being paralyzed in fear, you continue to run forward.

Someone tries to shoot an attack in your direction. You move to the side just in time to hear the metal sphere whiz past your head. Another tries to block your path, hand already outstretched to attack, but before they can, you blind them with a blast of fire from your fingertips and run. By the time they regain their vision, you’ll be long gone.

The adrenaline keeps you steady and as you begin to gain traction, the fighting feels more and more natural. You dodge every attack, weave through the bodies on the floor, send blinding light toward those who block your path—it feels like a repetitive, yet lethal game. One wrong move and you could be dead.

Out of the corner of your eye, you see the General. He’s favoring his left shoulder, but faring quite well despite his limited movements. He lights his enemies on fire. Wherever he goes, bodies burn and drop to the ground into ashes. The red flames reflect in his black eyes, and for a moment, you realize he looks menacing. Sweat drips down his face, tinging the ends of his hair, too. There’s blood on his hands, but you don’t think it’s his own. He seems to have been trailing behind you this entire time, ready to take action if anyone were to hurt you in any way.

A part of you is grateful, but another part of you worries. Maybe he doesn’t trust you after all. Why else would he be trailing behind you? Does he think you’re not capable of— 

You meet eyes with a man. A man who halts when he sees you too.

You don’t know why but your hand flies to your pendant, which had untucked itself from your uniform.

Something electric sizzles down your spine.

Your jaw goes slack.

Your vision becomes blurry.

Suddenly, images flash before you.

Him reaching behind you to clasp your necklace on. Him leaning down to kiss your cheek. Him wiping the tears rolling down your face. Him making you laugh, him making you smile, him making you cry. Fighting with him, dancing with him, running with him.

It all comes so quickly. Too quickly.

You’re left breathless.

It’s him.

The man in your dreams.

The man who gave you the necklace.

The man who loved you.

But…

Why is he wearing the enemy’s colors?

Why is he raising his bloodied sword?

Why is there a flash of light?

Why are you suddenly falling?

And why? Why do you hear the General screaming your name before your world goes black?

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⨰ a/n: i had the most horrendous, absolutely disgusting week ever 😭 i ended up sleeping quite literally 2 hours per day, but i absolutely didn't want to disappoint on the literal FINALE of legends of darlari's ACT I. i apologize if there are more errors than usual, but this is it! the completion of the first act. thank you for reading this far; it's been an amazing journey writing this story, and i hope to offer more in the coming acts!

please consider telling me your thoughts with a comment, an ask or a reblog :) i love hearing readers' impressions/rambles/predictions! if you want to join the taglist, send in a private message, ask, reply to this post or reblog with your request!

#legends of darlaria

[ittomi]

24 | Legends of Darlaria

⨰ summary: You wake up amidst a war with no recollection of your past. Faced with suspicion and distrust, you struggle to assimilate into a foreign nation—otherwise known as your home. But on your enlightening journey to search for your identity, you come face to face with the General of the Army.

⨰ pairing/rating: yoongi x reader & jungkook x reader | PG-15

⨰ genre: 70% angst, 30% fluff | war!au & magic!au

⨰ warnings: profanity, implied mild depression

⨰ wordcount: 6.0k

⨰ join the taglist! (pm/send in an ask/reply/reblog)

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⧖⧗Circa Ruby⧗⧖

Within one circa of physical therapy, the General is able to walk around just as he normally had. He’s still unable to fully utilize his right shoulder, but the healers have been saying that he’ll make a good recovery. It’s good news for everybody.

You’ve been spending a considerable amount of time with him. Of course, the time you spend with the General is kept quite professional. Both of you treat the single conversation where you’d both admitted to everything as if it had never happened. But deep inside, his words lull you to sleep, echo inside your head when you wake up and follow you around when you complete your duties for the day.

But Officer, I don’t want you to think for a second that this will change how I feel for you.

You hope it might be the same for him—that he hears your earnest confessions in his head, even when you’re not with him. But on second thought, the empty yearning you’re forced to feel—emotions that can never be expressed in fear of blundering both your reputations and authority—you would never want another to go through them. Even if it means he no longer feels the same way that you do.

At first, you’d been in despair. It isn’t fair. He had no choice but to become the General of the Solarian Army. He was automatically handed the position after his younger brother had passed. But what if he never wanted to lead an army? What if he wasn’t born in the Min Clan? Then would he still hold the belief that love and war cannot coexist? And what about you? If your past self—whoever she was—had decided not to enlist in the army, would she have also thought differently? In another life, it could’ve been possible. And knowing that fact was heartbreaking. It made you want to lie down and take a nap so long that when you woke up, the war would be over. Or you’d be dead. Whichever came first. 

But when you think about it now, you feel fine. Sure, it hurts a little—nothing can ever come to fruition despite how you both feel. But it’s for the better. And besides, you have never stopped seeing him since then. Even back when the General was bedridden, he’d often called for you, whether to discuss battle plans or for you to read him some excerpts from borrowed books. And now that he’s able to walk around again, the two of you have begun the habit of going on brisk morning walks together, at the edge of the forest. Today is no different.

“How are you feeling today, sir?”

He nods a good morning to you and promptly answers your question. “Better than yesterday, Officer.”

“That’s been your answer for the past several days,” you smile. The two of you begin to walk to the edge of the camp, bordering the trees at the entrance of the Alderian forest.

“But it’s the truth,” he answers, hands lacing behind his back as usual. “I’ve been recovering well as you may have already gotten from the healers.” He pauses. “I hear you’ve been discussing with them quite a bit about my health.”

You whip your head around at the General, only to find him grinning just slightly. You can only scoff in reaction. “And you’ve been secretly asking my major if I’ve been overworking myself!”

“I didn’t want you to waste your time with me when you’re already fatigued,” he says. “Your health and duties are more important than keeping me company.”

You can feel your cheeks grow hot. “But of course! You don’t have to worry about me. I can handle quite a lot.”

He glances at you—you can see it out of the corner of your eyes. “Then don’t worry about me either. And for the same reason.”

You smile. “Yes, sir.”

He looks straight ahead, but you can see the faintest smile on his lips. 

There are often silent moments when the two of you walk together. But the silence is comfortable—peaceful, too. His presence keeps you warm on cold autumn mornings, even if you keep a considerable amount of distance between the two of you. Yet you don’t need proximity to feel close to the General.

Today, just like always, you slow your walking once you reach the central medical tent. You always hate when this time comes. Because it’s the time that your walk with the General comes to an end. It’s the time that he walks back to his own tent and you walk into the medical tent, ready to deal with the groans of pain and the stench of the dying. 

“Thank you, Officer,” he tells you—just like always—“for keeping me company.”

“Of course, sir,” you reply. 

Just like always.

His gaze on you lingers as does yours. And you love the way he looks at you, eyes softened, lips slightly parted, cheeks tinted a rosy hue. The latter might be due to the cold, but you like to imagine that it’s due to something else. Something that he’s feeling.

But before anyone can notice, and before you’re ever ready for him to leave, he always turns away. And just like always, you watch him go, longing for the next day to come so you could do this all over again.

⧖⧗Circa Peridot⧗⧖

There’s been a gaping hole in the army since one circa ago when the General had been attacked and injured. It’s extremely noticeable to Suhyun, who refused to step up to become the temporary General of the Solarian Army. It wouldn’t be right of her to swoop in to claim such a big title the moment the General became injured; she would look power-hungry and selfish, and that’s not the kind of leader Suhyun strives to be. And besides, she’s still far from prepared to take on such a big role.

Without Suhyun taking the General’s place, the officers have offered to equally share the General’s duties; yet, she had refused that, too. She’s his lieutenant. She should take the brunt of the work. And so she did. It puts some strain on her life, but she reminds herself constantly that this situation is infinitely better than the General being dead. At least now, she knows that this chaos is only temporary.

She has been working with a team of healers to investigate the properties of the fragment of the metal sphere that had threatened the General’s life. So far, they’ve figured out that if the fragment is locked away in an airtight container, it ceases to spew out lava every two minutes. They don’t know why, and they’re still unsure if these properties apply to the full sphere. It’s still an investigation in process.

So far, the officers who do go out to battle, everyone except you, have been ordered to attempt to bring back a fully intact metal sphere, but the efforts have been fruitless. Still, Suhyun hasn’t lost hope just yet. 

Sometimes, though, she feels as if the whole nation rests on her shoulders. She supposes this is how the General always feels—as temporary king, as the leader of the entire army, as the sole ruler of a nation at war. She now understands the gravity of having such a high position. Sometimes, it’s too much. Sometimes, she cries into Jaeno’s chest at night and wakes up with tear streaks dried to her cheeks. Sometimes, she even leans on you because, somehow, you’ve been handling the news of the General’s injury better than anyone in the campgrounds has. 

She realizes that she had been wrong about you. When adversity strikes, you do not crumble and fall as she had. Instead, you lead with stability and a sense of calm. You might initially panic—because who wouldn’t—but you recover quickly, think quickly, too. For Sooht’s sake, you’re the one who saved the General’s life! You need to be out there on the battlefield.

She must tell the General. But how? He’s always been so against you fighting. She suspects it’s something personal, but there’s nothing personal about a captain doing her duties! Your strength and mental resilience could bring who knows how many more victories? You write the battle plans, but if you were to act upon them too, the Solarians would be unstoppable!

“General? I’m sorry to ask to barge in so suddenly, but there’s something that I’d like to discuss with you,” she calls outside of the General’s tent, twisting the rings adorned on her fingers.

She hears a bit of silence, a bit of rustling and then a calm answer: “Come in, Lieutenant Ki.” When she obediently steps in, she notices that you’re setting wet cloths and empty dishes back on a tray. A surprised “O-Oh!” slips from her lips.

“Suhyun!” you exclaim, lifting the tray and inching towards the exit of the tent. “Sorry about being in your way; I’ll be out in a second.” After you give her a knowing smile, you turn to the General, and Suhyun can’t miss the way that his cheeks are flushed more than usual. “I’ll see you later, sir!” 

She watches in awe as he smiles. She can’t remember the last time he’s done that in front of her. Even when you wave goodbye to Suhyun and disappear behind the curtains of the tent, the General’s gaze lingers on the fluttering pieces of fabric, almost as if he was wishing for you to come back. She’s seen that same look on her boyfriend several times before. There’s really no doubt about it that there really are personal matters between you and the General. And maybe it’s not her business to care, but when these matters begin to affect the General’s judgment… then maybe that’s when she gets a say.

The General clears his throat, slightly shifting from his position on his cot. “What was it that you’d like to discuss with me today, Lieutenant Ki?”

“About Captain Ryu, actually,” she says, walking closer to the General. He visibly tenses up but lets her continue. “Sir, I want you to reconsider her duties. As a captain of the second sector, she is qualified to fight in battles.”

He raises his eyebrows. “Why the sudden change of mind?”

“I used to believe that she is unfit for the violence and cruelty on the battlefield. I believed that she would not stand a chance against the blood and the dying. But,” she says, taking care to choose the correct words, “I have seen her react to disaster better than I ever could. When you were barely conscious, sir, when you were practically lying on your deathbed, she was the one who stepped up and gave orders to save your life. She did not crumble as I feared she might under unfavorable circumstances. She, in fact, shined brighter. She knows how to lead in chaos, sir. I believe this gives her every right to be allowed to fight.”

The General’s face is contorted. “Well… She… I…” He takes a deep breath, seemingly gathering his thoughts. “Your example, Lieutenant Ki, would make her an excellent healer, but I fail to see how this will make her a good fighter on the battlefield. She may be able to delegate tasks exceedingly well in the medical tents, but the battlefield is certainly a different story.”

“With all due respect, General, is it?” Suhyun says. “We all began somewhere. I would argue that we were even less prepared than Captain Ryu is now when we were thrown into our first battles. Her experiences in the medical tents, as an officer, as a captain and a battle coordinator are more than enough to sustain her success out there. She can be an even more valuable asset to your army; I believe the battlefield will unlock the potential within her that we never even knew was there.”

“No.”

“No, sir?”

“I’ve said it time and time again, I will not allow her to fight.”

“General, with all due respect, that doesn’t make any sense,” Suhyun says. She knows she’s pushing things, but how can she not? She wants to fight for you—because she knows how much you want to be out there, fighting for your nation. Suhyun also wants to fight for Solaria, which will only benefit from your involvement. “She is a captain—not just an officer anymore—and with her new title and position should follow the correct responsibilities. There will always be soldiers out there who will undermine her achievements and her authority if she has less battlefield experience than they do.”

“I gave her an order and I expect you to respect it, Lieutenant Ki.”

She can feel herself wilt, but she can’t back down now—not without finishing things her way! You’re counting on her; she promised you days ago that she’d change the General’s mind. And it took Suhyun three days to gain enough courage to confront him. She’s not letting all that preparation go to waste.

“I trust you, General,” she says, slowly, carefully. “I really do, but I just can’t come to understand this decision. Please, if you could explain why she cannot fight, then I’d be delighted to obey.”

She can see him hesitate. “She just… she can’t. She’s not good enough.”

“I have overseen some of her training and have only heard of great things from Major Im,” Suhyun refutes. “She’s well over the minimum qualification level to be on the battlefield.”

“We can’t let her die.”

“But we can let the others?” 

“Well then, she is our sole battle planner.”

“We can find her a suitable apprentice.”

“But she’s already balancing multiple jobs.”

“Nothing that we can’t fix with a little bit of adjustment.”

“For fuck’s sake!” the General shouts. “I said ‘no!’ Do you not fucking understand what that means?”

Suhyun takes a step back. 

She’s rarely heard him raise his voice at others before, and he’s especially never done it to her—until now, of course. And though her hands suddenly feel clammy and her throat feels dry, she doesn’t feel shame. Instead, all she feels is something searing hot boiling inside of her, threatening to spill out into words. In the end, it does: 

“You’re being irrational!”

The General’s eyes widen. He makes no other indication of how her words might’ve affected him, but she knows that he’s shocked. She also knows she shouldn’t continue—even raising her voice at the General of the Solarian Army could be classified as insubordination. And sure, she’s being a hypocrite, too. Yelling irrationally at the General won’t solve anything except make things worse, but the past two circas have been hell for her. Can’t he understand? 

“I worked my fucking ass off ever since your injury!” she shouts, pointing an accusatory finger at him. “Do you know how stressed I am all the time? I haven’t gotten sleep in three days, running around the entire campground trying to listen to every issue and complaint, working my job but also yours, too. I don’t think I’ve sat down for a proper meal since Circa Alexandrite, for Sooht’s sake! I have battles to fight in, cooking duties to tend to, and even officer meetings to facilitate! 

“Just yesterday, for the first time in my entire life, I wished to go back to Ara. I just… I needed to quit everything and leave. But I stayed. I took on all of your responsibilities without so much of a complaint in front of you because I know you have it worse. I know you feel like a burden. I know how much pain you’ve been in. I’ve tried to understand, General. I really have. But this is too much. Let her fight! You know she’s overqualified. You know she’ll do well. You know how much she wants to do it! If she fucks something up, I’ll take the entire blame. So for Sooht’s fucking sake, let her go out there! Please, just please don’t give me another problem to be worrying about.”

She’s crying and she knows it; her vision is blurry and she can barely make out the General’s countenance, but she knows from the ringing silence that it can’t be good at all. If this is what gets her demoted, then so be it. She’s done competing for power; she’s done kissing ass and biting her tongue for a promotion. She’ll happily call out the General’s bullshit. It’s her job to do so, anyway—as his right-hand officer.

“I’ve always respected you,” she says, heaving for breath, her voice trembling. She wipes her tears with the back of her hand. “You’ve always listened to your soldiers, your officers, the people… You’ve always wanted to rule differently from your clan. But tell me, how are you any different from your brother now? How are you any different from your own mother?”

Maybe she went too far. Maybe she was being too mean. Maybe she should’ve persuaded him gently. But she’s human too! She has emotions. She gets angry and annoyed and irritated too. There’s a limit to how much utter bullshit she can take, and she doesn’t fucking care if it’ll backfire in her face anymore. Everything she does is for Solaria, and if her superior is guided by his personal feelings, then maybe she doesn’t want to work for him anymore. Maybe she’ll take matters into her own hands.

She stares daggers into the man in front of her, yet he still refuses to look up. Refuses to speak. 

It’s strange.

When she has outbursts such as these, she usually finishes them feeling much better. But why does she feel worse? The tears also won’t stop. She doesn’t know why. She should be angry at him! She should hate him for being so blinded by his feelings! Yet… something twists inside her stomach when she thinks of how deeply her words might have cut him. He’s already injured—did she really have to rub salt in his wounds? Did she really make a grave mistake? Oh, for Sooht’s sake, she can’t bear to be in the same vicinity as him anymore. And so, for the first time in her life, she leaves without his dismissal, stumbling out of the tent in desperation to get away.

Yoongi’s left in complete silence—an eerie standstill. He stares into his hands, feeling oddly numb.

How are you any different from your brother now? How are you any different from your own mother?

Well, in truth, he feels ashamed. Lieutenant Ki is right. What he did just now—what he’s been doing regarding your involvement in the army has been akin to what his mother and brother have done: selfish and intolerant ruling. He knows that if Doyun were here, she might have even slapped him for being so stupid. But he can’t help it. He barely got out of the battlefield unscathed, which means it’s an even more dangerous place for you, a newcomer. It’s illogical; he knows. It’s an abuse of his power, a misuse of his authority. But he’s lost everybody he’s cared for in his life to this damn war. Can’t he bend the rules just this once? It might not be the most rational thing to do, but since when have feelings been rational?

⧖⧗Circa Saphh⧗⧖

You’ve been visiting him less these days. Ever since he lost his temper at Lieutenant Ki last circa, his tent has been fairly bare, save for the healers who visit occasionally to check up on his healing process. You’ve suddenly become unavailable for your morning walks together. He doesn’t know if it’s because Lieutenant Ki told you about the argument or if you’re really that much busier now. Or maybe… Maybe you don’t want to see him anymore. Maybe you believe that if you cease to see him, you’ll cease to care for him. It’s the worst theory of the bunch—the one that hurts him the most. Because he can’t imagine ceasing to care for you. 

Now that he sees you less, he thinks of you more. It drives him insane.

When he goes on his assisted strolls with healers, he sometimes catches sight of you, running errands, training, walking with your sector’s soldiers. Those moments are always special to him because even seeing your face is enough to make him feel a little bit better. But he wonders if you ever notice him. He might be imagining it—he really hopes he is—but he thinks you might be avoiding him. In fact, everyone has. Soldiers do not even bow in his presence anymore, which is fine since that’s what he’s always wanted… Still, the sudden switch is unsettling.

He hasn’t talked to Lieutenant Ki since their argument, which means he hasn’t been getting updates on the officer meetings and the logistics of what’s been going on in his army. But he also can’t bring himself to seek after her and scold her for keeping him in the dark. There’s a large part of him that feels guilty for that day. He had been the one who had raised his voice at Lieutenant Ki first; he had been the one who had been purposefully ignorant and stubborn and irrational and stupid. He had also been the one who had been so oblivious to her internal stress and struggles. So in the end, he can’t necessarily blame her for keeping her distance. And seeing that there haven’t been any more disasters, Lieutenant Ki’s been running things smoothly around here, so he doesn’t really feel the need to interfere, either.

But he misses the presence of his officers. He misses having visitors other than healers in his tent. He misses those morning walks with you, your conversations (no matter how short), your voice, your smile, your company. Should he apologize to you?

But why? For barring you from completing your true duty as a second sector captain? For indirectly confessing his feelings to you when he’s your superior? For being born as the heir to the Solarian Army? For not reaching out to you first?

How pathetic would it seem if he tried to get ahold of you through one of the healers? But he can’t bear seeing you now—not when you’ve been actively avoiding him. Not when he’s surely done something wrong.

Mornings and nights alone in his tent are beginning to get quite lonely. He learns how to deal with the pain, his aching body, but it’s not so easy to learn to be alone with his own thoughts. He often feels powerless, stranded on his cot, with no one but himself and the figments of his past, haunting him. It feels like circas since he’s last dealt with his duties as the General. His brisk morning walks around the edge of the campgrounds morph into a mourning session within the burial grounds. He visits his brother, his sister, his mother, father, grandparents and his ancestors… He even visits Doyun, but those visits rarely do anything except make him feel worse. The hours of the day begin to blend together—to the point where he can no longer differentiate between morning and night.

He’s helpless—physically unwell and mentally fatigued. Yet, he doesn’t know what to do about it. At this point in time, he wonders if he’s old news. If the rest of the army has accepted the fact that Lieutenant Ki is now their new General. If he’s been disposed of.

He should be angry. Angry that he’s lost his position, his respect. Angry that he’s fumbled what the Min Clan has built and prided themselves in for centuries. Angry that he’s useless. That he slipped from his high seating, unable to claw his way back up. Angry that you haven’t been talking to him. Angry that Lieutenant Ki no longer looks up to him.

But he isn’t angry. Is it sadness? Despair?

No.

He simply feels numb. 

He’d rather feel something. Anything.

The weather has been getting colder these days, but even the cold doesn’t seem to bother him. But then again, the healers have also spoiled him with a few extra blankets and a couple of more oil lamps, which he believes he doesn’t deserve.

Even the good news that his shoulder’s been doing better doesn’t change anything.

But that’s when he hears your voice. “Sir?”

He nearly jumps up from his cot, which could have single-handedly reversed the hard work of the healers, but he manages to remain calm as he slowly rises. His balance wavers as he creeps closer to the entrance of his tent. Is that really you? He isn��t hearing things, is he? Has he regressed in health? Has he missed your voice so much that he’s beginning to hear things that aren’t there?

“Sir?” you call again. “May I come in?”

No, that’s definitely you.

He doesn’t know why after all these weeks you want to see him now. Still, he can’t help the hasty, “Of course,” that spills habitually from his lips.

You immediately part the curtains, walk into his tent and meet him face to face. You’re startled, probably not expecting him to have already gotten up from his cot. “O-Oh!” you say. “You’re standing.” Then, you look at your feet as if you’ve already humiliated yourself in front of him.

“I am,” Yoongi admits. He pauses. “It’s been a while.”

“I’m sorry.” You really do look apologetic.

“It’s fine,” he says. “I imagine you’ve been busy.”

“I have,” you reply, still refusing to meet his eyes.

“Have you been well?”

You shift your feet. “Yes.”

“Good,” he says. “Good.”

Unbearable silence.

Why is the atmosphere tense? Where is the comfort, the warmth that he usually finds when he’s with you? Why are you being so curt? Why do you refuse to look at him? Is he that repulsive to you? Do you no longer feel the same? Are you angry at him?

“I’m sorry,” you whisper. “I’m so sorry.”

Yoongi frowns. “There’s no need to apologize for being busy.”

“I-It’s… It’s not that,” you say. You mumble something so quietly that he doesn’t quite catch it.

“Sorry?” he says.

“I’m here to come to an agreement,” you say quietly. 

“An agreement?” he asks, frown deepening. “Whatever for?”

“For my duties as a captain,” you say, head still lowered.

“Oh.” Has it really been about this all along? You’ve been avoiding him because of his decision to bar you from the battlefields? “Unfortunately, I have already made my decision,” he says, voice soft. “I’m sorry, but I’m not open to any negotiations.”

“I’m… I’m afraid you don’t have much of a choice,” you say, and for the first time since you’ve entered his tent, you look up. Your eyes are surprisingly void of emotion, despite your quivering voice, and you look stern, eyes unblinking and mouth set in a stern line. “Your army has agreed on serving Lieutenant Ki—and only Lieutenant Ki—until you allow me to fulfill my duties as the second sector captain.”

He blinks. Then he blinks again. Impossible. It sounds rehearsed. As if those words would never come out of your mouth without another’s influence. But Lieutenant Ki would never stoop this low… would she? And even if she did, to have you be the one to break this news to him? 

“Am I being threatened with usurpation?” he asks. It surprises him how calm he is at the moment, how well he’s taking the news. 

His composed behavior even seems to surprise you as you struggle to find your next words. “It won’t be a threat if you only allow me to do what my title entails,” you say, eyes pleading. 

“Did Lieutenant Ki put you up to this?”

“That doesn’t matter,” you say. “I want this. I’m the one who wants to risk my life for this nation. Please. Don’t try to stop me.”

He shakes his head in disbelief. “Did you think I wouldn’t notice? I’ve already been cut off from the army. No one except healers has visited my tent until now.”

“I don’t want you to be humiliated,” you whisper. “That was never my intent. But…”

“But you would risk my humiliation and authority to fight for Solaria.” 

“That’s not what I mean,” you say, frowning. “We aren’t doing this because we don’t respect you. We just… This was the most effective solution we, I mean, I could think of.”

He hums. “Even if I don’t accept the agreement, things will still go your way.”

“It’s true. Lieutenant Ki would see to it that I would be allowed to fight.”

“Then this isn’t really a fair solution, isn’t it?”

“Well… Yes. Since it was created with only one outcome in mind,” you say, though you look sorry about it.

“I suppose I don’t have much of a choice.”

“Unfortunately not.”

“How much of this was your idea?”

You seem visibly thrown off by his question—and rightfully so. But he’s curious. Threatening usurpation is traditionally punishable by death. Of course, Yoongi had always been willing to break that tradition. Yet… who had thought so little of him that they believed this threat would back him into a corner and force him to make an agreement? 

“All of it,” you say. But you’re lying. Years and years of experience in the interrogation room have taught him how to differentiate between truth and fabrication. “I didn’t ever mean for things to get so big,” you admit. “I’m sorry.”

So you’re protecting the person (or persons) who gave you the idea. He has his suspects, of course, but he doesn’t think he’ll be able to fish that information out of you today. He sighs, shaking his head. He just wants this to be over. But for Sooht’s sake, she should’ve known—the person who orchestrated this entire ordeal—she should’ve known better. Lieutenant Ki should’ve predicted that threatening his position would do more than force him into a corner with his tail tucked between his legs. In a covert sense, it would single-handedly undermine his authority. Doesn’t she know that for years he had been insecure about the power he had at the tips of his fingers? Did she really have to come for something that he was already so unsure about? And to use you as her messenger!

But despite his thoughts, a simple, “I hope you don’t regret it, Officer,” leaves his mouth.

That single sentence brightens your entire face. “I won’t, sir,” you say. “I promise I won’t regret it at all.”

Though he loves seeing you smile, he can only seem to sigh today. “You are authorized for one low-stake battle. Your performance will be assessed, and only after I approve will you be able to fight regularly. Understood?”

“Oh, yes, sir!” you say. “Completely understood.”

He can’t answer, too consumed by his own thoughts. Is it the feeling of betrayal that seems to be weighing heavy in his mind? Or is it worry? He knows it’s selfish of him to extend his power to protect you, but after all the deaths he’s encountered throughout his lifetime, is it so wrong to hang on to just one person? 

“I told you it would work!” Suhyun exclaims, smiling widely as she moves in to embrace you. “I just didn’t think it’d barely take ten minutes. He agreed much quicker than I’d anticipated. But nevertheless, congratulations, Y/N! You deserve to fight for Solaria.”

“Thanks, Suhyun,” you say, but you still feel uneasy from the entire conversation. “I just don’t know if we should’ve threatened usurpation…”

“It’s not like we really did it,” she says, patting your back. “I only gave the soldiers a stern talk about not bowing to the General anymore—at least until he’s able to fight again. They did wonder why,” she adds after noticing the doubtful look on your face. “But I only told them that he wanted to step away from his work for a little bit during his recovery, and his soldiers bowing would remind him of the work he wasn’t doing. They seemed to believe me. Besides, this was really the only idea I had that would realistically work. And it did!”

You nod. “I’m glad it worked, but…”

“But you worry that he won’t be happy with you.”

You look up at her shocked at how easily she read your mind. “Y-Yes. That’s exactly it. If he thinks we backed him into a corner, then of course he won’t be very pleased with us. I don’t want him to think we were trying to subvert his authority. Suhyun, I’m pretty sure what we just did—even if it wasn’t real—is technically a punishable crime.”

“Traditionally, yes,” Suhyun says. “But the General tries to step away from the more extreme practices of his clan. I think it worked out fine. Sure, there are some things that could have gone better, but don’t you think the benefits outweigh the costs?” Even you have to admit that she looks a little disappointed with you. It’s almost as if she’s wordlessly saying, ‘If you have so many issues with my idea, then why did you agree to go through with it anyway?’ But maybe she’s right. Maybe you came off too strong. Maybe you’re being ungrateful. It’s thanks to Suhyun and her encouragement that you’re now able to fight for Solaria once more—after years of being unable to. Yet…

“What if he hates me now?”

Suhyun raises her eyebrows. “If anything, Y/N, the General will begin to resent me.”

“You?” you ask, eyes widening. “But I told him that it was my idea.”

Suhyun just smiles. “Y/N, he’s not stupid. He can see through lies most of the time. I’ve known him for a long time; just as he’s known me for the same amount. He’ll know I’m the only one who could suggest just a preposterous idea… and have it actually work.”

“But Suhyun, I’m not sure if that’s the best case, either! You’re his lieutenant, aren’t you? Shouldn’t you be his supporting officer?”

“I took a calculated risk,” she says with a shrug. “I agree with you, of course. It wasn’t right of me to threaten to take his position, but how else would he understand the gravity of the situation? I’m sure he’ll be wary of me now, but I did what I did for you. And for the good of the army.”

“Do you really think I’ll be of help on the battlefield?” you ask. “I… I don’t know if I’m worth all these calculations and plans and risks.”

“Even if you aren’t, which you are,” Suhyun says, “I think it’s best to enforce the duties of those in the army. Resentment grows when things are unfair, and I’d rather have an unhappy General than unhappy soldiers. And it��s not that I don’t want the General to be happy… I care about him too, Y/N. It’s just that I would never want to hear the things the soldiers have said about his brother to him. The General was being stubborn and irrational, and he said himself that he would never want to rule like his family. All I did was suggest that we slap some sense into him. For his own good.”

“It sounds like you’ve given this a lot of thought,” you say. “And you’re right. I agree with everything that you’ve said. I just—I worry.”

“I know,” Suhyun says. “The General does too.” She shakes her head, sighing out loud. “I respect him. I really do. It’s not his fault he was injured, and I can’t blame him for being stubborn, either. I know he struggles with his own authority, and sometimes it just ends up manifesting in unexplained, uncompromising orders. But I also know how betrayed he might feel. I did try talking to him; that was a bust. I didn’t know what else to turn to but this.” She sighs again, glancing over at you while twisting the rings on her fingers. “Let’s hope I didn’t miscalculate.”

You hope so too.

In the end, you got what you wanted. You’ll soon begin your rigorous training and finally, fight the first battle of your memory. But why? Why do you feel so shitty about it? 

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⨰ a/n: gasp! the second to last chapter before the second act??? it's unbelievable how far we've come with this story :) i'll save my official thoughts for ch. 25, but just know that i am so grateful to you for coming this far and reading about my characters' stories!

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