iwillpissyourpants

[iwillpissyourpants]

If you could give every bg3 companion advice what would it be?

[iwillpissyourpants]

Yeah, that's about it.

Writing a fic when you're uninspired:

*writes half a sentence* *checks tumblr; no updates* *checks discord; all servers; no updates* *goes back to doc* *re-reads last three sentences* *removes last half sentence written* Hmm I want some tea ... *makes tea* *checks tumblr again; one new post* *checks discord; all servers; no updates* *checks four latest opened tabs* *remembers an old fandom you haven't thought of in years; goes to AO3 to see if there are any good fics for it* *opens three new fic tabs* *remembers that you're supposed to be writing* *writes a sentence* I'm kinda hungry ... *checks cupboards and fridge for snacks* *remembers that it's ten pm and you shouldn't snack at this hour* *remembers that you made tea; it is now cold* *drinks cold tea* *re-reads last three sentences* *checks tumblr; no updates* *checks discord; all servers; no updates* *in desperation, checks twitter; it is a cesspool of evil so you check tumblr again; one update* *reblog* Hmm, I have too many tabs open ... *opens a random tab; it is a 70K fic with 1K worth of tags that you last visited three months ago* *reads fic* Four hours later: ... I should go to bed. *closes doc* Total words written: 44

[iwillpissyourpants]

Some notes about this that I think is interesting. In low approval he's almost completely still and doesn't blink. Not even once. He's fully alert and on guard. He does NOT trust tav. In high approval he literally slow blinks like a cat and sways back and forth a little like he's giddy to talk to tav. He shows complete trust and absolutely adores them. Either platonically or romantically. Just some details that I think are really cool and show how much thought the devs put into these interactions. Even though most of the time we can't even see the faces he makes when talking to him.

[iwillpissyourpants]

Plot twist, The blessing worked. The guy was a sacrifice.

"So... wait, I'm confused."

"What are you confused about?"

"Well, he was praying to a God to bless our soldiers in the coming battle, and then he got struck by lightning."

"Yeah. And?"

"Is... is that like a good sign or not?"

"I mean, if he was praying to a God of lightning, maybe?"

"What are the odds of that?"

"Admittedly not high."

"So... we aren't getting a blessing then?"

"I'm gonna make the assumption that no, no we are not."

"Okay, just so we're clear."

[iwillpissyourpants]

some of yall need to understand that "my body, my choice" also applies to:

addicts in active addiction with no intention of quitting

phys disabled people who deny medical treatment

neurodivergent people who deny psychiatric treatment (yes, including schizophrenic people and people with personality disorders)

trans people who want or don't want to medically transition (yes, including trans masc lesbians with top surgery and trans women without bottom surgery, yall are so weird to them wtf)

and if you can't understand that, then you don't get to use the phrase

[iwillpissyourpants]

meet in the middle

[iwillpissyourpants]

ASKING AFTER THEIR FRIENDS I Baldur's Gate III

[iwillpissyourpants]

Chapter 16

Multiple police cars were in front of your house and you were sitting on the grass. Kunikuzushi was by your side pulling you close to him as you looked like you could throw up any moment.

He didn't know what was on the letter because his first instinct was to grab you and comfort you as you sobbed in his arms. 

You were not allowed inside so he put his jacket around your shoulders to keep you arm and made sure it was comfortable for you to lean on him.

An elderly police officer walks towards you, hesitantly approaching you at this moment, knowing it was a bad timing but also knowing he had to question you.

"Miss, sorry to interrupt you but could I ask you a couple of questions?" He said professionally, yet uncomfortably looked away. Fumbling with his hands which didn't go unnoticed by Kunikuzushi.

Kunikuzushi was immediately glaring at the guy but you stared at the older man in front of you and nodded.

You moved your head from Kunikuzushi's shoulder to make proper eye contact with the man even though all you wanted to do is wake up from this terrible nightmare.

"Please state your name and address first."

You answered with a hoarse voice and he continued.

"Could you tell us what happened before you found the letter at your door?"

"I was.. Walking.. Towards my house and.." You struggled to continue. Not because you didn't remember, but because you didn't want to relive the moment inside your head again..

"She found the envelope on her doormat. She picked it up and opened it." Kunikuzushi, who had gotten irritated, answered as he held your hand.

"Sorry but are you Miss L/n, I don't think so?" The police officer looked a bit irritated as his interview was interrupted.

"Does it really matter now? Can't you see how traumatized she is? Are you blind or really this stupid?" Kunikuzushi yelled, now standing on both feet as well, attracting other officers to also listen in to the conversation. 

"Maybe if you would just stay out of it, this would be much easier. I'm the supervisor here and you are nothing, a nobody." 

"Oh you think you are better than me, right? You worthless shit. Have you really gone braindead to not have a single ounce of care to realize in what mental state she now is?" Kunikuzushi looked the police officer dead in the eye as he walked closer while the police officer tried to keep his distance. You tried to get up on your feet, not wanting him to escalate the situation even further. 

"Oh so now you're calling me heartless? You disrespectful piece of shit. You young people are so rude and you know I can get you arrested." He threatened back but Kunikuzushi didn't blink once. He, on the contrary, smirked and stepped forward. 

"Try me." The simple words that set off the police officer as imaginable steam came out of his ears. Other officers quickly went over to grab him in an attempt to stop him, but it didn't work. 

You too, quickly run up, ready to defend Kunikuzushi from the unbelievably corrupt police officer. Using his title and authority to try and arrest Kunikuzushi for no crime or unlawful activity was definitely a crime. 

You stumbled in front of Kunikuzushi as the police officer was about to land a hit, instead of hitting Kunikuzushi like he was aiming at, he hit you right in the head and you fell back into Kunikuzushi's arms. 

It was like a dramatic scene as you felt blood dripping your forehead to panicked people running around. 

However Kunikuzushi was shockingly also part of the  panicked people and quickly yelled at the other officers to call for an ambulance. He looked furious. A death glare was permanently on his face each time he looked at the scared police officer. 

He held you tightly in his arms and tried to stop the bleeding with his hands, even ripping off a part of his clothing to try to pressure the point of where the blood was coming out. It didn't help much and the blood was dripping down your kimono, staining the beautiful silk that was definitely worth thousands. 

You tried to keep your eyes open but struggled as the noise mixed with your pain confused and hurt your head. 

You felt your vision fading away as you saw the lights of an ambulance in the distance.

Couple of weeks earlier... 

"What do you mean the bomb has been disabled??" La Signora yelled to one of her subordinates. 

"U-uhm well we just found out this morning.." 

"Be more specific."

"Well u-uh it's last known location was thousands of kilometers from the target's home address.. And then the mark on the map just disappeared!" 

Signora sighed, trying to compose herself. 

"And why didn't you activate the bomb as soon as you picked up any movement away from her home?" 

"Nobody was watching the bomb's location at the time.." 

"WHERE WAS EVERYONE THEN?" 

"We were watching her and.." 

Signora turned around, walking towards her desk and placed both hands on there. Her subordinates looked at each other with a knowing look at what was going to happen.

They quickly shut the door as Signora screamed. They could feel the feeling of vases being thrown at them even if they weren't inside. It was not the first time this happened. 

To shake off the uncomfortable feeling they quickly left and went somewhere else to hide and hope Signora would forget about the incident.

"Those stupid fuckers always fuck up somehow.. It was such a simple task too.."

Suddenly a knock on Signora's door interrupted her anger.

"It's me~ Can I come inside?" An all too familiar voice said and Signora didn't respond.

The door opened anyway, moving the broken pieces of a vase as well as letting the person who knocked in.

"What do you want, Dottore."

"Heard you from someone you want to take revenge on our dear Balladeer~"

"Just shut the fuck up and leave-"

"How about I help you with torturing him?"

Signora raised her eyebrow in interest. She turned around facing the Doctor and crossed her arms as she looked for any sign of foolery but didn't find any.

"I'm listening."

The Doctor grinned as he already had a plan in mind. He too wanted to take revenge on Scaramouche and make him suffer, however if he wanted to do that, he had to use you, Scaramouche’s dear lover.

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Notes:

:)

Summary:

You've dated Scaramouche in your high school and college years but just as you wanted to announce your pregnancy to him he broke up with you without any reason. He left you to be a single mom for 7 years. But now that your daughter has been missing and abducted for a year and you've not been doing well and out of a sudden he showed up into your life again trying to apologize for his past mistakes..?

Taglist:

@swivy123 @kichiyosh1 @wwwrizchan @k1t0 @killumeow @pinkdreamerbailifflawyer-blog @samarill @xiaotopia @aqualesha @eattingshits @omoriaddict @mave-in @sketcheeee @xiaossocksniffer @elernity @ohmyfinggod @luvkvni @kunikissr @meadowofdarts @kaoriie @scaramochies @ekriis @rizakari @xxrexx @lovingveliona @magica-ren @lilybythevalley @theflatdoorkicker @lazy-sanns @reixtsu @fullw0rld @kunikuzushis-darling @childesgingerhair @kochothehoe @mercy-not-merci @ash1

[iwillpissyourpants]

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#astarion #baldurs gate 3 #bg3 fanart #baldurs gate fanart #bg3 #astarion my beloved

[iwillpissyourpants]

I may not have appreciated it at the time, but I do now. Thank you.

[iwillpissyourpants]

The snow had piled in a fine layer over the garden, green poking through the blinding white.

She brushed through the cold, ice already melting in the spring sun, to stroke the lax fronds.

"Come on, pretties. Time to wake up!" She whispered and smiled when the snow was shaken off by leaves stretching up to greet her.

[iwillpissyourpants]

I’m so fucking sick of it

Bruce Wayne IS NOT BATMAN!!! Leave the damn man alone! No offense but Bruce Wayne is a fucking idiot

Have any of your seen a single interview with him? The man legitimately didn’t believe narwhals existed

[iwillpissyourpants]

[iwillpissyourpants]

Even pouting, he looks beautiful

I LOVE HIIIIIM

[iwillpissyourpants]

Thinking abt Soap who thinks/feels fairness is extremely important and who would fight tooth and nail to get justice for someone who he cares abt being mistreated in any way... just thinking abt how he wouldn't care about the consequences it would have on himself, and how he would stick up to any authority if he felt like it was needed.

Thinking abt there being some kind of disagreement with Price, probably a complicated issue. Price is getting orders that make no sense, tf141 is being punished for mistakes that the higher ups made, and Price can't really do much about it without sacrificing his job. Soap can't accept it though, telling Price he's become too complacent, tell him he won't follow these bullshit orders under any circumstances. He won't stand by and watch his team get harmed and/or killed simply because their bosses are too scared to fix their own damn problems.

Idk there's no real conclusion to this I was just thinking abt Soap and Price having a fight

[iwillpissyourpants]

I think the GoT dragons look dumb :/ it just doesn't make sense to me

[iwillpissyourpants]

Friendly reminder that while Palestine should be free, Jews shouldn't die. Israel doesn't represent most of its citizens. Like how most Americans I know are Pro Palestine despite Genocide Joe being the president. This isn't the fault of Jewish people. It's the fault of Israel, or the IDF.

Free Palestine.