lemonjohnson-blog

[lemonjohnson-blog]

deuteragoniist:

▐ ↳ ◸ Oh why did he have to be the one stuck working with the other. A faked laugh, and a role of his optics, he looked at the other, and sighed.

             ❝ Yes. Aha, sad child. Brilliant, really- truly is. You should have gone into comedy instead of whatever mess this is. You would have killed it… probably literally knowing your track record but hey, what do I know. ❞ ◿▐ 

“Oh, oh riiighhtt.” He said patting the android on the head.  “You’re one of my sad children. Clearly second generation with that weak sass. Why do you sound so, pathetic. I thought they were suppose to make you charming. That’s why they went with the British accent. Not really, you look like the boys further down in the lower labs. Did Greg remember to drain those?”  

#deuteragoniist #Welcome to Aperture Science {Main Verse}

[lemonjohnson-blog]

#Lemons and Science {Aesthetic}

[lemonjohnson-blog]

eldritchsales

“Who let the eldritch representative into my office? We’re not having their union meeting until Thursday!” He glared at this assistant who shrugged looking nervous. "Great job Greg.” Cave adjusted his coat glaring at . “Hello, Cave Johnson CEO of Aperture Science.” He smiled looking the creature up and down. “I wasn’t really expecting any visitors till Thursday. Afraid most of our Test Subjects are.... Busy.” 

#eldritchsales

[lemonjohnson-blog]

engineeringfear:

         「 Flug mumbled something that might have sounded like “yeah, sure” and fiddled with his goggles. 」

    ❝ Ah–yes, the shower curtains. And the other inventions. Anything that might not be quite, ah…how do you say…ready for public release? Provided you’re allowed to show me, anyway. ❞

         「 Flug was here to steal ideas. He was a villain, after all. He clasped his hands behind his back and smiled a little under the bag. 」

“We do have brilliant blue blast proof curtains we are testing.” He held his hand for the lab coat and goggles. “Now, you have singed all the wavers right?” He asked looking the man up and down. He was lanky he wouldn’t last long in the test field. He looked more suited to be among the boys. “Are you a cellar dweller?” Cave asked with a raised brow. 

#engineeringfear #Throwing Science at the Wall {Crossover Verse}

[lemonjohnson-blog]

Cave Johnson here, there seems to be a breach here in the lab. Well, we thought it was a breach.  Really it’s just Greg’s legs running around on the lower floor.  (Muffled screaming)  Oh relax at least the boys found it.  Good job team! 

#Johnson Here {Cave Johnson's recording}

[lemonjohnson-blog]

engineeringfear:

         「 Flug tapped his fingertips together, hurrying to come up with some explanations that weren’t quite the truth but would pass for it. 」

    ❝ I do. It’s uh–for safety. Protocol and all…and no I’m–not from Black Mesa. I’m from an–independent study. A representative they sent to check up on your work and stuff. Being an inventor as well…I’m–we’re curious as to what you have here. ❞

         「 He didn’t miss the almost ‘test subjects’ that slipped out. He’d just have to not get caught in the crossfire. 」

“Son, you’re at my lab. My Safety Protocols don’t call for guest to wear lab coats or goggles. I’m positive you’re just here to see how we make our grade A shower curtains. The bag can stay, I’m sure it must smell like someones lunch. If I’m lucky it’s Greg’s.” 

#engineeringfear #Throwing Science at the Wall {Crossover Verse} #((Look at this sassy man... Who doesn't care about your feelings ))

[lemonjohnson-blog]

engineeringfear:

    ❝ Well, uh, sir, it’s–sort of standard for me now. And my goggles protect me from going blind. Uh…usually. But also, there’s the fact that I don’t really–work. Here. For you. So I wouldn’t get compensation anyway. I’m just here for the uh–tour. ❞

“I’m gonna be level with ya. Who wears a lab coat on a tour? Are you with Black Mesa?” He said eyeing the man. “When did we start giving tours? Is this Greg’s idea?” He groaned rubbing his eyes. “We must be scrapping the barrel for tes- I mean guest if we’re offering tours.”

#engineeringfear: #Throwing Science at the Wall {Crossover Verse} #(( Pffttt hello~ Welcome to Sass Johnson... He's gonan make you great at SCIENCE XD))

[lemonjohnson-blog]

engineeringfear  “Son, I’m gonna be honest. Paper bags aren’t good lab practice. One blast of any of our various body enhancing or dehancing gasses. BOOM! Your blind for a week no workmen comp.”

#engineeringfear #Good News! {Unknown Verse}

[lemonjohnson-blog]

#Wheatley #Personality Core

[lemonjohnson-blog]

#Lemons and Science {Aesthetic}

[lemonjohnson-blog]

tag dump 

#Fuck your lemons! { Cave Lives AU} #Welcome to Aperture Science {Main Verse} #Johnson Here {Cave Johnson's recording} #Lemons and Science {Aesthetic} #Good News! {Unknown Verse} #Throwing Science at the Wall {Crossover Verse} #Control Group {Answered Asks} #We'll Do What We Can {Meme} #It's a Lively One {Crack} #Advice From the Lab Boys {Out of Character}

[lemonjohnson-blog]

@deuteragoniist “Who lost this sad child?” Taps mic turning on PA “Attention, attention would the owner of this, sad, just so very sad, child come to office and pick him up? Seriously this kid is bringing me down.” 

#deuteragoniist

[lemonjohnson-blog]

@spacey-enthusiasm “Well, aren’t you.... Do you even work here? How did you get into my office? Greg!! GREG! Honestly you better not be creepy like Greg’s nephew.” 

#spacey-enthusiasm

[lemonjohnson-blog]

Cave Johnson here, just a reminder, if you signed up for testing out our new clean energy fly car. You’re gonna be disappointed. The last test subject took it for a joy ride.  Poor sap. He’s at the bottom of the gorge now.  

#Johnson Here {Cave Johnson's recording}