leo-i-dont-know

[leo-i-dont-know]

your child had to learn to love themself after years of hating themself because of constant criticism, they had to learn to love every part of themself, their “flaws” and who they are. if the only love they ever got was from themself, then maybe you didn’t do such a good job as a mother

[leo-i-dont-know]

i would like to stop making realizations about my childhood now. i think i've learned enough, thanks.

[leo-i-dont-know]

🎶 Where were you when everything was falling apart? 🎶

[leo-i-dont-know]

me

[leo-i-dont-know]

[leo-i-dont-know]

the fact that I repeat "I'm sorry" and "i (just) want to be good" over and over and over almost compulsively whenever I have an emotional breakdown is probably very indicative of something deep in my psyche and the way that I perceive myself on a base level

[leo-i-dont-know]

i’m missing parts of myself left with hatred, with anger.

[leo-i-dont-know]

"We are different it would be a dream for you to go back to your childhood.

For me, it's a nightmare."

[leo-i-dont-know]

How many of you can relate?

I most def can...

[leo-i-dont-know]

[leo-i-dont-know]

Common acting by emotionally unstable/immature parents:

they become defensive when you disagree and may attack back;

they are dismissive of your emotions/don't really try to connect with you;

they make everything about them and how they feel, especially your emotions/reactions: you have the power to make their mood;

they do not create a deep bond with their child: they don't know you deeply and it may make you feel lonely, but expect vulnerability and comfort from you even without asking for them;

they blame you for whatever reason (especially things they have done);

use parenting to boss around the child and show their power/that they own and command their child: you have no privacy or boundaries of sort;

may guilt or shame you into doing things for them;

have no tolerance for stress/get easily angered;

have a difficult time apologizing and may turn it into blame/go away;

are emotionally insensitive or misbehaving, or not constant in their responses/feedback;

they may also show more compassion towards people/situations outside the family.

[leo-i-dont-know]

nah babe it's just that the trauma is traumaing today so i might not respond to your text

[leo-i-dont-know]

[leo-i-dont-know]

"I'm trying."

"Well, you aren't trying your best."

"But I am!"

"Still, your best is not enough."

"That's because nothing I do will be enough in your eyes. I don't even know why I'm still trying my hardest to please you."

-by ahopelessromantika-

[leo-i-dont-know]

[leo-i-dont-know]

[leo-i-dont-know]

The landscape is your eyes.