My Biggest and Most Annoying Fictional Horse Pet Peeve
Big Horses are a Very New Thing and they Likely Didnât Exist in your Historical and/or Fantasy Settings.
Youâve all seen it in every historical piece of media ever produced. Contrary to popular belief, a big black horse with long legs and long flowing mane is not a widespread or even a particularly old type of horse.
THIS IS NOT A MEDIEVAL THING. THIS IS NOT EVEN A BAROQUE THING. THIS IS A NINETEENTH CENTURY CITY CARRIAGE HORSE.
All the love to fancy Friesian horses, but your Roman general or Medieval country heroine just really couldnât, wouldnât, and for the sake of my mental health shouldnât have ridden one either.
Big warmblood horses are a Western European and British invention that started popping up somewhere around 1700s when agriculture and warfare changed, and when rich folks wanted Bigger Faster Stronger Thinner race horses.
The modern warmblood and the big continental draught both had their first real rise to fame in the 1800s when people started driving Fancy Carriages everywhere, and having the Fanciest Carriage started to mean having the Tallest and Thinnest Horses in the town.
Before mechanised weaponry and heavy artillery all horses used to be small and hardy easy-feeders. Kinda like a donkey but easier to steer and with a back thatâs not as nasty and straight to sit on.
SOME REAL MEDIEVAL, ROMAN, OTTOMAN, MONGOL, VIKING, GREEK and WHATEVER HISTORICALLY PLAUSIBLE HORSES FOR YOU:
âPrimitiveâ, native breeds all over the globe tend to be only roughly 120-140 cm (12.0 - 13.3 hh) tall at the withers. They all also look a little something like this:
Mongolian native horse (Around 120-130 at the withers, and decendants of the first ever domesticated horses from central Asia. Still virtually unchanged from Chinggis Khanâs cavalry, ancestor to many Chinese, Japanese and Indian horses, and bred for speed racing and surviving outdoors without the help of humans.)
Carpathian native horse / Romanian and Polish Hucul Pony (Around 120-150 at the withers, first mentioned in writing during the 400s as wild mountain ponies, depicted before that in Trajanian Roman sculptures, used by the Austro-Hungarian cavalry in the 19th century)
Middle-Eastern native horse / Caspian Pony (Around 100-130 at the withers, ancestor of the Iranian Asil horse and its decendants, including the famous Arabian and Barb horses, likely been around since Darius I the Great, 5th century BC, and old Persian kings are often depicted riding these midgets)
Baltic Sea native horse / Icelandic, Finnish, Estonian, Gotland and Nordland horses (Around 120-150 at the withers, descendant of Mongolian horses, used by viking traders in 700-900 AD and taken to Iceland. Later used by the Swedish cavalry in the 30 years war and by the Finnish army in the Second World War, nowadays harness racing and draught horses)
Siberian native horse / Yakutian pony (Around 120-140 at the withers, related to Baltic and Mongolian horses and at least as old, as well-adapted to Siberian climate as woolly mammoths once were, the hairiest horse there is, used in draught work and herding)
Mediterranean native horse / Skyros pony, Sardinian Giara, Monterufolino (Around 100-140 at the Withers, used and bred by ancient Greeks for cavalry use, influenced by African and Eastern breeds, further had its own influence on Celtic breeds via Roman Empire, still used by park ranger officers in Italy)
British Islesâ native horse / various âMountain & Moorlandâ pony breeds (Around 100-150 at the withers, brought over and mixed by Celts, Romans and Vikings, base for almost every modern sport pony and the deserving main pony of all your British Medieval settings. Some populations still live as feral herds in the British countryside, used as war mounts, draught horses, mine pit ponies, hunting help and race horses)
So hey, now you know!
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James Buchanan Barnes was a childhood friend of Steve Rogers. He was assumed dead after falling off a train, but survived thanks to Arnim Zolaâs experiments. HYDRA brainwashed him, making him a ruthless killer responsible for many deaths. He was missing an arm, so HYDRA replaced it with a cybernetic one. HYDRA then froze him in suspended animation. Bucky was MIA for long periods of time âtil HYDRA saw fit to unfreeze him. Over the next fifty years, Barnes was activated to assassinate Nick Fury as the Winter Soldier.
Blood in the Breeze, by Alice Zhang.
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Winter 1939, Bucky Barnes trying to cheer up a sick emo kid Rogers, making up The First Winter Army.Â
*ink, watercolors*
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we should globally ban the introduction of more powerful computer hardware for 10-20 years, not as an AI safety thing (though we could frame it as that), but to force programmers to optimize their shit better
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Trying to figure out if youâre ace or aro can be so much harder than other sexualities because itâs like, trying to find the absence of something. Imagine youâre at a pond and you want to know if there are any turtles, or fish. Say you find a turtle and youâre like âgreat! Now I know there are turtles.â Or a fish, now you know for sure there are fish. Or you find both, and now you know for a fact there are both turtles and fish in the pond.
But like, if you donât find any turtles it might be that there are no turtles or maybe youâre just really shitty at looking for turtles and maybe you THINK you saw a turtle over there or maybe it was just a stick. Maybe there are only a few turtles. Maybe you need to do something special to find the turtles. Maybe a bunch of these rocks are actually turtles but you couldnât tell them apart. Maybe there are no turtles. You have no idea. Meanwhile some people are saying âOh there have to be turtles! Youâll find them eventually ;)â or âHow many turtles have you found in your pond?â or âTry planting some vegetables at the shore to attract the turtles.â Or âOh no! What disaster happened to your pond that there are no turtles?â And youâre just standing there wet with an empty net and a tired expression.
But whatever because whether there are turtles or fish or not your pondâs ecology works just fine without them because thatâs what eco-communities do they form a system around what they have. You arenât missing anything if you donât have turtles you just have a pond system without turtles. If someone tried to change you by pouring a bunch of turtles into your pond it would probably fuck something up.
So you donât have to be entirely sure. You donât have to search every inch of the damn pond before you can decide there are probably no turtles. If you want to take the aro or ace label because you think it fits go for it. And if you do find your turtles you can rename the pond. Thatâs fine.
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neurodivergent child: *asks a lot of questions because something doesnât make sense to them*
parent: why are you arguing with me.
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So we all know that Tumblr is US-centric. But to what degree? (and can we skew the results of this poll by posting it at a time where they should be asleep?)
Reblog to increase sample size!
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