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𝗶𝘁 𝘄𝗮𝘀 𝗷𝗮𝗺𝗲𝘀 𝘄𝗵𝗼 𝗵𝗮𝗱 𝗮𝗻 𝗲𝗴𝗼 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝗶𝘇𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝗮 𝗹𝗮𝗸𝗲

𝗯𝘂𝘁 𝗮 𝗵𝗲𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝗺𝗮𝘁𝗰𝗵 𝗶𝘁...

mskingbean89 "all the young dudes" on ao3

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“My Father’s going to kill me.” It was so much easier to say father than mother. Sirius didn’t want to think about what his mother would do."

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"here was proof of what he’d known, secretly, to be true: he didn’t belong. He was a disappointment. If his parents didn’t know by now, they would tomorrow"

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"Sirius felt a sudden surge of emotion. He wasn’t sure what it was about James Potter—the smile, the happy confidence—but somehow, hearing him talk like things would be alright made Sirius feel as if, maybe, they really would be alright. After all, it was true, wasn’t it? Sirius hadn’t wanted to be in Slytherin, not really. And he loved the color red."

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"If I’m going to be the family disappointment, Sirius thought, moving to his trunk, I’ll be the best bloody disappointment they’ve ever had."

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"Sirius put on Abbey Road so that James and Peter could listen to it, insisting that he was about to change their lives. To his irritation, the other boys kept getting distracted—James kept asking questions about the words, and Peter wanted James to play chess

“Sorry mate,” James shrugged, “It just doesn’t sound that different from other music to me.”

“You uncultured swine!” Sirius threw his pillow at James, who laughed and batted it away, “The Beatles are gods among men. If Remus were here, he’d agree with me!”

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canonically, nico has smiled and laughed, like, a lot. i jump every time i see “smiled” or “laughed” next to nico’s name. its uncanny.

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(I'll be honest, I don't really remember what the book says about this. And it’s also important to note that canon and fanon got mixed up in my head so much, so I can`t separate them)

But!

Just hear me out! Ok? It could be painful but anyway

Think about how Sirius came to Grimmauld Place for the first time since Azkaban. Firstly, he didn’t just come there after 12 years in prison. He came there for the first time since he was 16! But that's not the point.

The portrait of Walburga! I'm sure Sirius spoke to her!

Walburga couldn't just remain silent when she saw Sirius. She screamed at him, how he dared to come there, tried to kick him out of the Grimmauld. So Sirius immediately ordered Kreacher to cover the portrait. He tried to remove her from the wall… many and many times, but it was unsuccessful. So he had to accept that his mother would continue to grumble from under the cloth. Every time Sirius passed by, she continued to mutter, sometimes scream, and insult her own son. She called him a disgrace to the family, a blood traitor and said that he was not her son, not Black, and had no right to be here, she wished him death a lot of times. Walburga wanted to get him, to hurt him, and Sirius knew it. He knew he should ignore her. He tried, tried very hard to ignore insults from the woman who gave him life. It happened that several times he stopped in front of the covered portrait, but after a second, he gathered his strength and kept walking. But at one particular moment, something broke inside of Sirius. He furiously pulled the cloth off the portrait.

Just think about that conversation, if you can call it a conversation, that happened next.

Please, I'm begging, someone write extremely angsty and heartbreaking fanfic about it.

And also a few things that, in my opinion, happened then:

No matter how emotionally Walburga had screamed before, but the moment Sirius tore off the cloth, shouting “enough!” his mother sat there calmly with the coldest expression on her face, and the first thing she said was: “I’m not surprised that you betrayed Potters. You've been a wimp since childhood". And it was the moment they both new it, she got him, it was the point of no return.

It also seems to me that Walburga would blame Sirius for the death of his brother. Not because she thought so. Because she was hurt by the loss of Regulus, and she wanted to hurt Sirius the same way.

When Remus entered the Grimmauld Place that day, the first thing he heard was Walburga`s grating voice, resonating through the house in insults. She kept exclaiming all those awful things about family betrayal, Regulus`s death, and Potters, she even mentioned Remus. The next thing he found was Sirius on the floor in the very corner of the room, in complete darkness, because Sirius got used to this after 12 years. To the darkness and cold floor. Sirius sat there looking as miserable as never before. He was hugging his knees and rocking back and forth paranoidly. His eyes were red, tears were streaming down his cheeks, and all Sirius could say was a quiet and repeated "enough" mixed with sobs.

And also think if there was a portrait of Regulus in the house and if Sirius ever spoke to him.

this pics was created by Ai. I couldn't choose which one is better, that's it

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*Remus and Sirius bantering*

Snape, *sneering*: Look at you both. Fighting like an old, married couple

Sirius, *smirking*: Yeah, but with amazing sex

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lil wolfstar headcanon that just came to me

both Remus and Sirius have cried to Rock ‘n’ Roll Suicide by David Bowie (separately and together)

listen to it if you don’t know what I mean

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Vibes.

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sirius again hehe

i mean honestly who’s surprised at this point

i’ll never stop drawing them hehe ;)

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remus would not be one of those people who only listens to underground music and avoids anything mainstream and really loves being unique and an individual and not like anyone else.

that man is the most sheep person ever. he already has enough stuff that sets him apart from his peers, he would not actively be trying to further that! that man wants to fit in so bad and be like everyone else. he'd pretend to like popular bands and films and act like he gives a damn about quidditch.

like, especially as a teenager, remus was so preoccupied with fitting in with the masses but could just never succeed cause he was too gangly and awkward and poor and weird and could never shake off the rumours he was mentally unstable (hence the nickname 'loopy lupin'). which is one of the biggest reasons the marauders was so important to him. because it was the only thing where he fit in and belonged.

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james : good morning!!

regulus: what a beautiful day to shut the fuck up.

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Ah, yeah- suddenly it makes sense

Sirius totally is the kind of guy to use overconfidence and humour as a coping mechanism. He can fluctuate from "I'm the greatest gift to wizard kind" to "I don't deserve to even exist, I'm sorry for breathing" in seconds and I don't know how Remus manages to keep up with it, but I'm suddenly beginning to understand his addiction to coffee and why he's so tired all the time.

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Sirius totally is the kind of guy to use overconfidence and humour as a coping mechanism. He can fluctuate from "I'm the greatest gift to wizard kind" to "I don't deserve to even exist, I'm sorry for breathing" in seconds and I don't know how Remus manages to keep up with it, but I'm suddenly beginning to understand his addiction to coffee and why he's so tired all the time.

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Man you're so real for this. It's like both Wolfstar and Jegulus coded. Not all of us chosing the most heart crushing songs for our biggest ships istg.

Sirius totally is the kind of guy to use overconfidence and humour as a coping mechanism. He can fluctuate from "I'm the greatest gift to wizard kind" to "I don't deserve to even exist, I'm sorry for breathing" in seconds and I don't know how Remus manages to keep up with it, but I'm suddenly beginning to understand his addiction to coffee and why he's so tired all the time.