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[lowlevelofserotonin]

I wish I could split in two and let part of me die. A piece of me really wants to no longer function. But a chunk of me knows that I have to stay. I have to make everyone happy. Keep everyone safe. But I’m ready to be set free. I can’t stop shaking. My eyes puffy and teared. My lungs gasping for air. This is no way to live. This is no way to live. There is no room for love. No nothing, when you’re the damnedest.

[lowlevelofserotonin]

i :) don’t :) wanna :) be :) alive :) anymore :,)

[lowlevelofserotonin]

it’s sad how with bpd even when i’m feeling good i can’t enjoy it in the moment because i know it won’t last for much longer..

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"Where do you see yourself in 5 years?" Dead, hopefully

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I want to kill myself thank you for asking

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[lowlevelofserotonin]

the borderline fear of accidentally harming your partner if you split and thinking about all of the mean things you could say and how terrible you could be towards them. I don't want to hurt them but the thought is lingering in my mind. I love them so much i don't ever want to hurt them or make them scared of me or make them hate me. they mean too much to me.

[lowlevelofserotonin]

Getting better is a lie. Who the fuck actually recovered from BPD?? I read that some people recover and don't even fit the criteria for BPD anymore. How the fuck?! You must have a huge support system and they must never hate you. I'm alone all the time and left to destroy myself. Shit doesn't get better. It's all a lie. People are liars. And this life is a cruel joke. People pretend. And I don't trust anyone. I'm going to destroy myself quietly and they won't even know. Nobody checks on me. Nobody ever tries to save me anymore.

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Snale

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having an intense emotional reaction and being called dangerous and scary when you know a literal hug would calm you down is one of the worst parts of bpd for me that make me feel so misunderstood

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