millaniumcat

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Reality for Kaz Brekker

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This post by @dwyntwo has been in my head

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Show Wesper would absolutely make out during the Ice Court Heist like the desperate mad lads they are because they aren't sure they're going to make it out alive.

Prove me wrong, Netflix. I dare you.

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Dark side of the loom

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I will never stop with the Nina and Kaz haircut jokes

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i forget how much jesper was going THROUGH it in crooked kingdom. he punches kaz, gets into a big fight with his dad, and kisses kuwei - all in TEN PAGES

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Wylan, coming home some time post-Crooked Kingdom: Hello, people who do not live here

Nina, Inej, and Kaz: Hi

Wylan: I gave you a key for emergencies

Nina: We were out of Doritos

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ah yes. the two ultimatums. kiss pretty girl w tongue or kiss pretty guy with tongue.

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wylan (other than kaz) is the only other crow who can braid inej's hair perfectly. i don't make the rules.

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three times Kaz was the Professor Teenage Criminal Prodigy-

-and the one time he wasn't

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The Crows’ Sibling Alignment

this is going to be ramble-y and probably only make half-sense but here we go.

Matthias is an eldest sibling. It’s canon, it’s obvious. He holds the weight of the world on his shoulders trying to be responsible in the group of people he’s been given.

Nina is a middle sibling with younger sibling traits. She had to fight for positive attention in the Little Palace, and learned that negative attention is still attention.

Inej is a youngest sibling. Ignoring the show, and taking a guess about Suli culture, I’d say she grew up around her cousins and they were all sort of raised together. Although she may not have any biological siblings, she was always the baby.

Kaz is a youngest sibling. No one else could have that much audacity.

Jesper is an only child with eldest sibling traits. Going from golden child to family disappointment is a pipeline 90% of eldest children have to go through. (Myself included). He puts a lot of pressure on himself, and wants to be good for his Da but he struggles.

Wylan is an only child. It’s canon, it’s obvious. But not only is he an only child, he’s a homeschooled only child.

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‘he has terrible taste in women’ my brother in ghezen that man is a homosexual

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Imagine this. The stadtwatch finds a tunnel underground somewhere in Ketterdam. They're like "Wtf is this doing here", climb in and follow the tunnel, thinking it's leading them to an underground crime syndicate or something, only to find Kaz freaking Brekker at the end of it with a shovel in his hand. They just stare at him for a moment and he stares back until he eventually says "Leave" with his appalled, scratchy ass voice as if they just broke into his living room and invaded his privacy. The stadtwatch officers are entirely confused and unsure how to handle this situation, so they just awkwardly retreat, one of them even mumbles a "Sorry".

Kaz turns back to his work shaking his head, being all like "The NERVE of some people"

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TW:Gore, Dead body, Blood yk the whole package

Turn up brightness if you can't see it

Hc: Wylan becomes more unhinge after the crew's heists and starts using bodies around Kerch/harbor and collects materials from their bodies

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Jesper: My life isn't as glamorous as my wanted poster makes it look like.

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Idk why this is so funny to me but it absolutely is

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He may not have won, but look how happy he is for others! He is too precious and sweet for this world.