mmacdauthor

[mmacdauthor]

people are way too comfortable being dismissive of children and teenagers. if a toddler comes up to you and starts explaining skibidi toilet lore or if a 13 year old asks you if you want to hear about their mha ocs you have to listen with utmost sincerity or at least pretend to. this is the only way you will get into heaven.

[mmacdauthor]

— have you tried the peat over here — yes. i have tried all of this peat — i do not think you have tried this peat. if you had tried it you would have remarked upon it — i have tried it — you would have said, "this peat is as salty as day's honest work, and as sweet as the first sip of vodka past my lips at sundown" — is that something i say? — yes. you say it all the time — i don't think i say it all the time — yes, you do. and you would have said it when you tried that peat — let me try it again, then — oh, now he's interested — mm. wow. ok — you're not going to say it? — say what — you know what — it's nice peat. no strong associations

[mmacdauthor]

ME

[mmacdauthor]

the story of kfc fucks me up man. the colonel founded this gas station that expanded to restaurant, the chicken at the restaurant gets popular, makes KFC, it gets big and he sells it to a corporation for a lot of money. realizes he got sorta scammed out of the true worth of kfc so tries to get more money and they refuse and the courts side against him. then he starts a new chicken restaurant claiming the corporate people were not making chicken to his standards and kfc sued him because kfc owned the colonel's likeness and the courts agreed. a corporation owned this man's name and appearance. he wasnt allowed to use either, thus legally erasing his reputation making it harder for him to get taken seriously in any food venture. the man, to the day he died, was going into kfc's and throwing fits because the food had fallen into such bad shape he hated it was associated with him. and it's like, whether he's a bad man or a good man or whatever, a corporation owned his identity, stopped him from using his reputation and identity in other businesses, and refused to acknowledge his outrage that they changed his recipes and still attributed it to him. this is literally the obnoxious plot of a jay and silent bob movie, but it was this dude's real life. what the fuck.

[mmacdauthor]

[mmacdauthor]

I Can Eat Glass

I Can Eat Glass was a linguistic project documented on the early Web by then-Harvard student Ethan Mollick. The objective was to provide speakers with translations of the phrase "I can eat glass, it does not hurt me" from a wide variety of languages; the phrase was chosen because of its unorthodox nature. Mollick's original page disappeared in or about June 2004.

As Mollick explained, visitors to a foreign country have "an irresistible urge" to say something in that language, and whatever they say (a cited example being along the lines of "Where is the bathroom?") usually marks them as tourists immediately. Saying "I can eat glass, it does not hurt me", however, ensures that the speaker "will be viewed as an insane native, and treated with dignity and respect".

[mmacdauthor]

tbh the rat balls article confirms a lot of what i worry about these days which is that no one is actually reading anything. people are just mashing "ok" on things and don't actually care. there's no actual quality control because to turn things down for their quality means turning down money for a submission

[mmacdauthor]

Source

Source

Source

[mmacdauthor]

[mmacdauthor]

I have been somewhat obsessed with the phrase "In what scientists are calling 'pretty gay,'" for many years because of this ancient xkcd

[mmacdauthor]

i'm a dark bodhisattva. i could escape samsara any time i wanted but i stick around to give ascetic monks heroin and blowjobs and also to kill anyone who gets close to nirvana

[mmacdauthor]

[mmacdauthor]

"Somebody needs to do something about Sephora 10-year-olds...these i-pad babies are so rude and don't do what they're told....oh my God, these kids can't read and have no social skills...Ugh, look at these little consumers and their Stanley Cups."

I am, in fact, actively worried for these children and I refuse to hate them for the ways that society, as a whole, has failed them.

[mmacdauthor]

[mmacdauthor]

yeah im still thinking about the minotaur sorry but just . imagine youre born wrong. imagine your entire existence is a punishment from the gods. for something you had no control over. imagine your mother holds nothing but contempt for you. she wont even look at you, not really, & she keeps crying & you keep crying & reaching towards her with your little arms & someone drags you away from her. & they keep you hidden & alone & a stranger comes & builds an impenetrable prison around you so youre doomed to forever haunt these endless corridors & youve never known kindness or companionship or love. & when they call you a monster. well. you believe them

[mmacdauthor]

[mmacdauthor]

The Two Types of “Mysterious Small Town” Stories