myawfod

[myawfod]

Glass Snakes

Eicher Glass on Etsy

#NEED

[myawfod]

You order a package off Amazon. When the Amazon delivery guy shows up to your door, instead of giving you the package you bought, he beats the shit out of you. Then, when he sees that you are not dead yet, he calls all of the Amazon delivery people in the area and they all proceed to beat the shit out of you. Miraculously, you survive. Another miracle: a friend in your neighborhood caught the assault on video. After a month of recovery and extensive hospital bills that you have no idea what to do with, the video has gone viral. You read the comments below. “This is what happens to people who fuck with Amazon!!!” Someone says. “I’ve never been beaten up by Amazon employees, and I’ve been using them all my life!” Someone else comments. Later, you start to see articles popping up about your story. They all mention that when you were 17, your license was revoked for reckless driving. In a Facebook post on your mom’s feed, someone is going on a rant about how not all Amazon delivery guys are bad, and that if you look really close, the “bad” ones are just stressed out. Your name is trending on Twitter. Jeff Bezos films a response to your attack, denouncing the video of you getting beaten to within an inch of your life by his employees as becoming “a symbol of hate towards Amazon.” The people who attacked you still deliver packages around your neighborhood. You saw one of them just yesterday as you were watering your plants. You still can’t pay your hospital bills. Your phone dings- Twitter again. “Maybe if you didn’t order from Amazon,” someone pipes up, “this wouldn’t have happened!”

#acab #btw

[myawfod]

[myawfod]

😭😭😭😭

[myawfod]

A thing I love to do is telling prepper dudes that one of my disaster readiness skills is making stuffed animals. They never get it. Like, my dude, when things get very bad and we're all sharing overcrowded shelters, you're gonna want the power to comfort children. Trust me.

[myawfod]

its so funny to me that people on twitter n tiktok are like "ok but porns still banned on tumblr so at least we're better then them" as if they dont have to typ3 w0rd$ I1k3 th!$ to get around their censors

[myawfod]

purpose of this poll: basically im wondering if my gran having a pistol was a typical american experience

[myawfod]

coworkers under 35 love me for my cowboy bebop jacket, coworkers over 35 love me for my cd player, management loves me for my mental illness-fueled punctuality. everyone feels vaguely wary of me for my overall poor impression of acting like a human

[myawfod]

I interrupt your scrolling to say: this is the love of my life, Minnie.

This is my angel, the light of my life, my reason of getting up, my actual child, and I will hear no words against her. Reblog to show her the love she deserves.

[myawfod]

till deactivation do us part

[myawfod]

hate when a batman artist isn't committed to bruce's lame bat schtick... give that man a bat insignia on the bottom of his boots rn

[myawfod]

please please please please reblog if you’re a writer and have at some point felt like your writing is getting worse. I need to know if I’m the only one who’s struggling with these thoughts

#like all things: cyclical #you must have somewhere to improve from #and nothing is linear

[myawfod]

listen, if you want to be with someone that has ADHD and doesn’t / can’t take medicine for it, you have to understand that we just forget. Yes, we know you had us write it down and put it somewhere obvious, we still forgot. Yes, you just said it 10 times, we still forgot. Yes, you literally, to our face, seconds before, told us in detail, we turned around and forgot immediately. we forget, everything, immediately, most of the time.

[myawfod]

[myawfod]

oh my god

[myawfod]

I got six words for you: I got four words for you: I got 2 words: Fuck you

[myawfod]

RB if you think CD drives in computers are not obsolete, but in fact still necessary, despite being artificially phased out