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People who ‘love nature’ but violently hate their native coyotes, spiders, snakes, and scavengers are fake.

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black cats are wonderful because you can stare into the void and not only does the void stare back, sometimes it trots up to you happily and begs for pats

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Gryffindor: You despise me, don't you?

Slytherin: If I gave you any thought, I probably would.

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amazon bring me….my child

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not watching the grammys and i’m glad about it because i hear ed sheeran won best pop album over people like lorde and kesha…if i wanted to watch trolls steal things from strong women i’d watch dora or something

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I’d like to be him

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hey fellas last night i took a medication which is more or less the anxiety equivalent of a horse tranquilizer & essentially enterred the fifth dimension of sleepwalking in which i awoke but enterred a dissociative fit so strong i was really confused why my loving girlfriend was not my good friend and fellow viking bjorn, who i had to bring some furs to. also i might’ve cried about this. don’t remember

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security called me at work today and told me they saw me outside chasing a frog around on the security cameras. i wasnt in trouble they just wanted to let me know they saw me. i didn’t catch him.

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My paper wants to see my ace friends

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speaking things into existence WORKS

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