pasdeclaire

[pasdeclaire]

i feel like everything is in vain.

I feel like everything I do is not enough. I wanted them to know, to be interested, I wanted to be able to share and not be afraid to be who I am. But I don't even know who I am. I shaped myself so much that sometimes I catch myself remembering the lies I told to be part of something. Sometimes, even more so, I find myself thinking about doing this. I want to show, and I NEED to be. I wanted to be important, important to the point of people asking about me, who I am, my tastes… I am more than my appearance, which, by the way, I don't really like, but I haven't had time to think about it. To be honest, one of the things that didn't make me commit suicide was this lack of information about myself.

I wonder if one day it will be possible, and if the time in this life would be enough to understand the complexity of being me, both for myself and for others.

[pasdeclaire]

april meal plan ᡣ𐭩

monday/wednesday/friday/saturdays:

breakfast - cappuccino whey

morning snack - fruit + orange juice

lunch - rice, salad and protein

afternoon snack - protein bar.

dinner - NO!

same on tuesdays, thursdays, but w/out afternoon snack.

on sundays, omad.

i'm a ballerina so i can't do nf for a long time, unfortunately.

#tw ed but not sheeran #ed br #ed dairy #ed diet inspo