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Ok but if we become best friends and you treat me right then there’s pretty much nothing you can do that I won’t be understanding over, like you could kill someone and I’d show up at your doorstep at 2 in the morning with a shovel and a can-do attitude

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the stereotype that women talk more than men is infinitely amusing to me because men are literally incapable of shutting the fuck up

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have you noticed that when someone goes ‘i was bitten by a dog once and now I’m kinda wary around them’ most people are like ‘aw, I understand’ but if a woman says she’s been raped/abused by men in the past and is now scared of them she gets told she’s paranoid and needs to get over it?

I noticed that.

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putting milk in the bowl first is divorce worthy

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why is the word cock so sexual and thick sounding but dick is just like. an unintimidating penis. hey lil guy

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do you ever use a pen and you’re just blown away by how smoothly it glides across the page and how the ink flows out so beautifully like tears of jesus or something

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Chris Pine: I need to get into character for this scene.

Chris Pine: Hmmmm….. What would William Shatner do?

Chris Pine: ….Nailed it.

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I love comparing the Avengers actors twitter bios because on the one hand, there’s Mark:

And then you have RDJ:

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sometimes even i can’t tell whether or not i’m being sarcastic