polyam-mess

[polyam-mess]

HELP ME I OOVE HIM SO MUCH. I AM LITERALLY. PASSING OUT. GSHAHAAAARRTTTFG....he makes my heart race bro gaejthfak3ktj r jrjjj r djejrjrjrj I look like a damn Tomato.HE HAS ME KICKING MY FEET AND FUCKING.....GIGGLING....AND FUCKING...............TEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHWHWHWHWHWHWHWHEHEHEHEHEHHEHE💞💞💞💞💞💕💞💕💕💕💕💕💕 I just wanna....smooch him so much I'm DYING.

[polyam-mess]

I hate him so much. I have done so much for him. been there as much as I can. I've helped how I can. I risked my own safety with my family for him. he said he would start talking to me more and he lied. I just miss him. and the fact that I think I'm attracted to him is awful. I don't have a crush on him but if he asked me out I'd say yes. I get jealous of people he talks to. I cry when he doesn't talk to me the same. I hated when he told me about that girl he liked. I hate being like this. he will never see me as anything for than a friend. I've tried to not feel this way too. if anything it gets worse. he treats me awful. he only pops in when he wants to vent. then he leaves. I mean it could be worse. he used to pop in only to ask for nic and then vent..I felt so used. I hate that I'm so worried for him. I know he isn't doing the best. I'm scared that he will do something. the fact he is dead for months doesn't help. it's gotten so bad I fucking have to text his sister to check on his ass. God damn it why does he have to be like this. :(

[polyam-mess]

gods this is really embarrassing to admit. it started as a joke and shit but I really really like him. he's so fucking cute- I don't understand why he doesn't think so. I think everything about him is perfect. God and his laugh? gives me butterflys. I love his freckles and dimples..I love his smile. he can be a little "mean" sometimes but I genuinely do not care. I love him. I don't even have the words to properly portray how much I like him. I think about him and smile..my face gets red when people make jokes about us together. I try to play it off and shit so I don't seem so mushy and gross. what if he doesn't really like me back? what if April lied to me. what if he doesn't like the fact that I'm so attached to him? I just want him to feel the same about me as I feel about him. I understand that's unlikely because of how he is. he doesn't get attached. I can wait. i would wait years for him. as long as it takes. anything he wants. if he wanted me to never talk to him again I would for him. as long as he is happy. fuck he shows me music and I don't even like country. I just listen to it because he likes it. I don't find alot of interest in anime anymore but I'm trying to regain interest in it for him. those coffee candys? they aren't my favorite but I'd pick them for him. I'd get candy from teachers just for him. that flower I gave to him? it broke my heart when I found out it was ruined. I picked that one specifically for him. it's okay though. I forgive him. I'll always forgive him. I love him so fucking much. one day I'll hopefully try to get the balls to ask him out. but what about Justin? I love him too. what if he isn't okay with me being poly? what if he isn't okay being with me because I'm trans and he isn't gay. so much could go wrong. I'd rather shove my feelings down my throat and choke on them than ruin my friendship with him. maybe one day I'll gain the balls to ask him out. I doubt it though.

#if he finds this ill kms #id be so embarrassed #id actually pass awah #hes for real so cute though #love him

[polyam-mess]

I've been with him a year and 3 months almost!! I'm so happy. I love him so much. I love being able to tell my family about him now..even my dad! My father!! My family likes him even though they poke fun at him..i don't care what they think about him. he is my beautiful boy and I would rather die than leave him <33

[polyam-mess]

we had a little minecraft date today as even though it didn't go as planned...at all I still enjoyed talking to him because I love him. I love him more than life itself. I don't know what I would do without him.

[polyam-mess]

I had a dream about us..a dream that he was here with me at my house. we had lunch. my parents were gone. we were eating and hanging out and then my brother made a comment that had him hugging and kissing me I had wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged him so hard. I was so fucking embarrassed and then my parents came home and I freaked out so I kissed him and pushed him out a window- where he banged on it for a while then just....left- I love dreams about my boyfriend so much

[polyam-mess]

god where do I start? he is literally the light of my life..he is just so perfect to me when he says my name or calls me hun it gives me SWARMS of butterflies..I love how he treat me and nothing could change how I think of him. I love his hair his lips his eyes he is beyond beautiful and his personality definitely matches he is just so captivating that I dont know what to do with myself he is just so addictive if I could talk to him every second of the day I truly would he just makes my day so much brighter and I could not be more grateful.. I am so smitten with him I felt like I have known him for ages..its amazing.. thank you for choosing me <3

[polyam-mess]

holy shit I love him he is so perfect in every way his eyes are so pretty I love his smile I love his little chipped tooth I love his cute nose I love his face shape I love his hair I love his dumb sense of humor I love how he says my name I love his laugh I love how he acts to me I love when he calls me hun I love when he says he loves me I love his voice I love how he dosent care about the shitty things I do. he just loves me....god I just love everything about him he is constantly on my mind no matter what..I just adore him so much I dont know what to do with myself I mean fuck 10 months with me? i dont understand..but god am I grateful I dont know what I would do without my beautiful boy

I love you so fucking much justin <3

[polyam-mess]

IM LISTENING TO THEIR PLAYLIST AND AND AND AHHHHHH I LOVE THEM SO MUCH I COULDN'T FOCUS BECAUSE IVE BEEN THINKING ABOUT THEM ALL DAY- I LOVE HIM SO FUCKING MUCH HOLY SHIT- JAY KEPT TEASING ME BECAUSE I WAS MAKING LOVEY DOVEY FACES AND SHIT AJDJJRJR I CANT HELP IT SHE IS JUST SO FUCKING AMAZING I CANT HELP BUT SMILE AT THE THOUGHT OF HER SKRJJRJF IF ANYONE TOLD THEM OR SHOWED THEM I WOULD DIE ITS SO EMBARRASSING TO ME- THEY NEVER MAKE ME FEEL WEIRD FOR IT BUT ITS JUST WEIRD FOR ME TO EXPRESS MY FEELINGS SO EXPLICITLY TO SOMEONE- GOD I JUST LOVE HER SO MUCH!!💕💕

[polyam-mess]

he dosen't use pet names but that's okay because when he says my name its special enough. when he says my name I feel all mushy and gooey- i get butterflies at the thought of it. I dont know why..I dont feel like that when others say it just him..god he is literally just perfect in every way. I love him so much. I would do literally anything he asked of me. no matter what It is. <3

[polyam-mess]

oh my god he is so pretty I dont even know how I ended up with him I dont even know why he likes me. he is so fucking cute and sweet and oh my god. i dont even know the words to describe how much i absolutely love him when i was trying to talk about him at school i literally started crying because of them- he is just so fucking amazing- last night I went to sleep thinking of him and listening to his playlist I EVEN DREAMT ABOUT HIM- HE MAKES ME SO FLUSTERED istg I just absolutely adore him IM SMITTEN. I love him sm JWJRUFIFUR 😭

[polyam-mess]

istg they make me so happy they can literally exist and breathe oxygen and I absolutely gush..they breathe and I'm so unbelievably proud of them I cant even properly express my love for them in words. I could go on and on about how much I absolutely adore them and how I'm smitten with them as much as humanely possible but it will never actually explain how strongly I feel about them. they make me so happy and I've never felt like this with anyone. I'm so grateful that I've met them I would do ANYTHING for them.

[polyam-mess]

HES SO AGHHHHHHHHHHHH I LOVE HIM WHY IS HE SO CUTE FOR. LIKE ITS SO STUPID HE ISNT EVEN DOING ANYTHING BUT HE JUST MAKES ME SMILE GRRRRR I LOVE HIM SO MUCH IM GONNA COMMIT A WAR CRIME/J

[polyam-mess]

he is beautiful, handsome, pretty breathtaking, gorgeous, attractive, charming, heavenly, stunning, exquisite, cute, magnificent, divine, alluring, pleasing, lovely, delightful, appealing, gorgeous, glamorous, irresistible, exquisite, aesthetic, magnificent, divine, dazzling, fascinating, fine, good looking, graceful, grand, splendid, superb, wonderful, ravishing, radiant, ideal, nice, excellent, enticing, admirable, angelic, beauteous, fetching, adorning, adorable, flawless, perfect, desirable snazzy, striking, eye catching, fabulous, top notch, sensational, tempting, magnetic, captivating, bright, my light, tantalizing, enchanting, pleasant, glorious, spectacular, fantastic, dandy, hunky, jaw dropping, blissful, sumptuous, extravagant, extraordinary, out of this world, perfect, wonderful, kind, caring, comforting, beloved, accommodating, most amazing person I've ever met and I love him so fucking much <33

[polyam-mess]

oh my FUCK..

I love them so fucking much why are they so fucking pretty I have done nothing but think of them all damn day I can't get them off my mind not even a little bit..their eyes their smile? oh my great god I love them so much why are they so fucking perfect. I love them so god damn much I'm gonna cry

I'm so fucking gay for him

[polyam-mess]

AHHHHH HES SO HANDSOME I LOVE HIM SO FUCKING MUCH HE IS SO AMAZING OH MY GOD I LOVE HIS FACE AND HIS PERSONALITY

I LOVE HOW HE DISPLAYS HIS LOVE! THE RANDOM COMPLIMENTS GIVES ME BUTTERFLIES THEY ARE SO CUTE! ITS SO FUCKING ADORABLE I WANT TO JUST..MARRY HIM AND TREASURE HER