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pyramultimuse · 16 hours
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For most of the ride Killian had focused on the other pirate, admiring the peacefulness of rest while he napped and the beauty of sadness when he awoke. He had a book to read and occupy himself for the trip, though it was mostly to ease away that feeling of being watched. This man was entirely his and yet not at all, with every fiber of Edward's being he wanted to be anywhere but here. He wondered if trying to win him over was pointless.
After awhile the forest gave way to coastline and a large portside city that was bustling with life. Out in the water there were fifty large ships of all kinds and dozens of smaller boats, rowboats and fishing boats. Killian reached over to the window to unlatch and open it up so they could enjoy the salty sea breeze. He took in a deep breath and sighed in content, he's missed this scent.
"Port of Camelot, place where everyone from the different lands of this realm come to trade goods." The dark one said as his eyes drifted to the large castle that overlooked the beautiful port then looked over to Edward. "You don't have to stay at my side, you're free to explore. The day is yours to do whatever you want, buy anything you want. Plenty of magical artifacts come through here, maybe you'll something." Killian said as he offered a small coin pouch that gave the pirate as much. As the pouch was dropped in Edward's palm there was some magic that returned a small amount of Edward's feelings. It wasn't immediate but the ability to feel anger was there.
The carriage came to a stop and Killian stepped out first and took in his surroundings. He could cause some trouble but he was weary of all the knights. "If you don't find what you're looking for by the time evening comes we can meet at the tavern next to the shipyard." Killian points out the enormous building at the end of the port that was the shipyard where ships would be built or stored, this was where Killian's kept his ship safe.
ᒥ🌟ᒧ—         When he's fixed up, Edward just sighs. Well, less for him to worry about, he thinks to himself. Not that he really cared to begin with, hence why he willingly came out just dressed. He, oh-so-badly, wanted to roll his eyes, but of course he can't. "Killian," He mumbles, showing that he'd comply. "That's a long time, gonna nap, Killian." Edward moves to lay out on the seat, he lays on his back with an arm draped over his eyes. His hangover may be cured, but he was still knackered from a night of drinking.
Edward wouldn't nap the entirety of the trip, about an hour in he sits up and digs through the chest for some food and drink. No more hunger strikes, it seemed. It had been his anger as the basis for those, clearly. Without it, he'd just do what was expected of him with melancholy. Those big, brown eyes of his were very expressive, like gazing directly into his soul and all the emotions that swirled within. Surprisingly, he wears sadness well. Anger may have been hot, but sadness on Edward was nothing but beautiful. Or so he'd been told when he was younger, and by a lover, of course, so there may have been some bias.
Its the way his brow crinkled, the glossing of those brown hues, and the way his lips pursed. As he chews his food, he stares out the window with that solemn expression. As beautiful as the sadness was on the outside, on the inside it was a hellscape. His thoughts raced with uncertainty and anxiousness. If he hadn't been busy eating, he would have stopped his leg from bouncing a mile a minute.
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pyramultimuse · 18 hours
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When Edward comes out simply dressed Killian gives him a once over and with a snap the man feels his skin refreshed, hair clean and detangled.
"Killian." He insisted at Edward informality of just calling him man. "Or I'll have you start calling me master." Once Edward chose the side he wanted to settle on Killian decided to lounge on the opposite side, one leg up on the plush seating and leaning against the side so he could look out the window when he felt like it.
After the carriage door was closed they began to move, it being a relatively smooth ride. "There's food and drinks in that chest if you're hungry, it'll be two hours until we're at the coast..." The dark one said as he picked up a small box and opened it, music box with a cone shape horn. He turned the little crank a couple times and instrumental music began to play a tune that would work nice with a shanty, upbeat but not too loud as he just wanted to fill the silence.
ᒥ🌟ᒧ—         Relived of the hangover, Edward sits up, surprised. Well, that was handy...Just magic away the gross, miserable feelings whenever need be. As much as it used to annoy him, that was a bit impressive. He didn't need to see Killian cast the magic to know that what's happened, a hangover like that doesn't just cure itself in a moment, it would have been a whole day affair. His time he gave would be spent getting ready, not that he used the whole hour doing so. If anything he took just under five minutes, enough time to put on clothes...That was it. Nothing else done. Old habits were hard to kick, and he had a terrible habit of lacking in self-care.
Dressed, he made his way to the entrance of the castle. In the doorway, he hesitates for a moment. Ed was nervous to step through, perhaps this was a cruel trick and he'd face repercussions if he dared to step out. However, seeing the carriage, he figured it couldn't be a trick. Why go through all the effort just for a mere trick? He takes a tentative step through the doorway, and once he's through he sighs with relief that nothing happened.
As he walks down the steps, for a moment he considers making a run for it, but surely that wouldn't go well. The Dark One had magic on his side, a chase wouldn't even happen, it would be a snap of his fingers and Edward would be back inside to be tortured. He wished he could get angry at his complacency, yet there was nothing but the deep settling shame.
"Awright, man. Here," He mumbles, climbing up in the cab of the carriage, intending to sit opposite of Killian. Edward doesn't have the best time in a carriage, based on the so few times he's been in one. He spends the time mostly zoning out while staring out the window, though if spoken to he'd reply.
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pyramultimuse · 22 hours
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"Take your time, You'll know where to find me when you're ready." Killian cast his magic out to relieve Edward of his hang over as well and went to prepare for travel. He his magic were limited, and there was a limit how far he could move a person so they would need a means of getting to the coast a different way.
The dark one went outside to use his magic to create a lavish carriage with two dark horses to pull it and a being that may or may not be human shrouded in a hood and cloak that would drive. Inside there were plush red seats across from each other, they could sit together or across from one another with the length they could comfortable lay down. Unlike normal Edward would be able to exit out of the castle and join the dark one when he felt ready.
ᒥ🌟ᒧ—         After he settled in his own room and the shock of waking up in Killian's wore off is when the hangover made itself known. And not just a hangover, but a wildly upset stomach from the amount of sugar he had the night prior as well. Sweets were a real weakness of his, he didn't come by sweets often, but when he did, Edward always went overboard with them. Curled in bed and trying everything in his power to not focus on the pounding headache or his churning stomach, there's a knock at his door.
"Yah, sure, man. Just...Give me an hour," Edward winces, regretting speaking so loud to be heard through the door as his head throbbed. He did want to go, he missed the sea something terrible, but he needed some time to bounce back from his night of mistakes. The initial hour was always the worst, but after he could man up and get on with his day. He just needed a little time of being miserable before he'd put on his big boy pants and move on.
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pyramultimuse · 23 hours
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The dark one doesn't wake when Edward leaves and he's able to sleep out unnoticed to go to his room or anywhere else in the castle. He sleeps for a little bit longer until the light angles through the curtain and shines on Killian rouses him. The throbbing migraine with a hangover hits him and he snaps his fingers to heal and it takes himself a few more minutes to wake himself up.
He remembers that he promised Edward to take him out today to visit the ocean and maybe spend a few days at sea on the Jolly Roger. He gets up and heads out into the hall as he sensed that Edward had gone back to his own room. Killian knocks at the door with his hook. "Edward?" He calls but doesn't enter. "Do you still want to take that trip I suggested last night?"
ᒥ🌟ᒧ—         Its the smell of Killian on the pillows that seems him rouse with a start, he knew it well after the other had held him the evening prior. With a bemused and sleepy expression mixed into his features, he looks around the bed noticing it wasn't his own. "Ya gotta be fuckin' kiddin' me..." He says in astonishment, realizing he must have drunkenly stumbled into Killian's room. It's the second time in a week he's mistakenly slept in the Dark One's bed, he was starting to think it was the other's magic at play, because how does that happen twice? Speaking of the Dark One...Edward looks around the room, because the man wasn't in the bed this time. He then spots him in a chair by the fireplace.
Ed did not want to wake the other, or even acknowledge he was in the guy's bed again, so as quietly as he can he slips out of the bed. Maybe he could sneak out without disturbing the other, that was ideal.
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pyramultimuse · 1 day
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"Hm, You were not magically stuck to the chair" Killian told him. The magic he had just felt was actually a spell to make sure that the man indeed would have only good dreams when he slept this night. No nightmares or fear would come to him.
The dark one stayed at the table for an hour as he drank the last bottle of rum. Alone with his thoughts of what he was doing, planning to do with Edward was depressing. He had become such an awful being that the only way he could get any companionship at all was through enslavement and manipulation. He thought about his crew, friends and lovers lost in his pursuit of killing the former dark one and becoming the man he was today. No, he was a monster.
Bottle of rum empty he left the dining room and the torches and candle light blew out with the magic as he headed up to his room. Ready to drop down into bed, once more there was the form of Edward all cuddled up in the dark one's bed. He sighed heavily and petted at the other's head. "You tempt me without even meaning to do so..." Killian murmured, this was all unintentional by Ed he knew. Once was an accident, twice is a coincidence and he did not believe in coincidence.
Not making the same mistake again Killian would go over to to the plush armchair in front of the fireplace. It began to burn on his magical command to warm the room as he settled down. Head resting against his fist and he stared at the softly crackling fire until his eyes grew heavy and sleep claimed him.
ᒥ🌟ᒧ—         Edward doesn't notice the pout, his eyes are still on the sweets, which he snags one more of. His stomach was going to hate him later on from the amount of pastries he consumed, but in the moment he doesn't really care. What he does notice is the gesture that allowed him to stand up, he raises a brow. "Oh shit, forgot I was stuck here...There's another example where 'm not feelin' much of that free will ya claim I got." Drunk off his ass, its said as a jest and meant no other way.
Up he gets, munching on his last pastry, and walks off for bed. "Night, man." A simple response back, no wishes of good dreams or even a good night said. Perhaps it was because he was drunk, or he just wasn't the kind of person to say cheesy things before bed. Whatever the case, Edward goes to bed for the night. The next morning he wouldn't wake up until late, where it was almost midday.
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pyramultimuse · 1 day
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They continued to drink and pleasantly eat for a little while longer and Killian really enjoyed the company. With both of them happily drunk but not to the point they couldn't function it was the nicest company the dark one had with awhile. So when Edward got to the point where he voiced he was ready for bed there was a pout for just a moment before he hid it with another sip from his own bottle.
"Good night Edward, I hope good dreams grace you this evening." Killian said with slightly slurred words as he gestured with his hook that the other had permission to leave the table and go to bed.
ᒥ🌟ᒧ—         He makes a face hearing that, as if he doesn't believe the other is that old. Because he doesn't. "...Heard some people say 'm livin' in the golden age of piracy. Sounds like a crock of shit, piracy been around a long time and will be 'round long after me. Not that it matters much ta me anymore, considerin' 'm stuck here." He shrugs, not a inkling of contempt in his tone. Edward has truly conceded. Not that he had much choice in the matter, he couldn't feel any anger to rebel against his plight.
He snorts at the idea of Izzy leading a ship, "My Iz? Captainin'? Never, the crew would mutiny within a day, toss his ass overboard. Guy is too much of a hard-ass, he's only safe from the crew 'cause I keep up the nice guy act around them. They'll follow my orders 'cause 'm fun, Izzy is just a little fecker." In goes another pastry along with more rum. He really should slow down soon, or there would be quite a mess. "If he could captain a ship, he would be. But he can't, he's too strict."
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pyramultimuse · 2 days
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Also having another pastry he takes a bite and licks up the cream and also washes it down with more rum. The sugar of the food just enhancing the effect of the alcohol they were drinking. Making their drunkenness come all the more quicker. Hearing about the strictness of the first mate that was left behind Killian hummed.
"That would do it. Have to have a firm hand to captain a ship, but if you're too strict then the men will become unhappy. Unhappy crew will make things change one way or another." Killian was glad that his former crew never did anything like that but he had heard of other crews mutaning and it was an awful thing. "Whoever captains the Queen Ann in your absence, I hope she's sailing strong." He said and lifted his bottle in a small toast to the other's ship.
ᒥ🌟ᒧ—         He makes a face hearing that, as if he doesn't believe the other is that old. Because he doesn't. "...Heard some people say 'm livin' in the golden age of piracy. Sounds like a crock of shit, piracy been around a long time and will be 'round long after me. Not that it matters much ta me anymore, considerin' 'm stuck here." He shrugs, not a inkling of contempt in his tone. Edward has truly conceded. Not that he had much choice in the matter, he couldn't feel any anger to rebel against his plight.
He snorts at the idea of Izzy leading a ship, "My Iz? Captainin'? Never, the crew would mutiny within a day, toss his ass overboard. Guy is too much of a hard-ass, he's only safe from the crew 'cause I keep up the nice guy act around them. They'll follow my orders 'cause 'm fun, Izzy is just a little fecker." In goes another pastry along with more rum. He really should slow down soon, or there would be quite a mess. "If he could captain a ship, he would be. But he can't, he's too strict."
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pyramultimuse · 2 days
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Killian listened with interest hearing about Edward's ship, it sounded like a grand vessel. He chuckled hearing about how all the regions seemed to be enemies of the pirate ship. "Some things never change, eh? Glad to hear that the age of piracy is still going strong though. It's been... A hundred, maybe a hundred fifty years since I left. I'm sure the legend of Captain Hook has been long forgotten." The dark one said as he started to take part in matching Edward's drinking, deciding it would not be enjoyable staying sober while his companion was getting drunk.
"I'm sure your first mate is capable." Killian said in response to Edward's worry. "You mentioned he's the one that takes care of your crew, so running the ship should be a breeze while he's all that's there."
ᒥ🌟ᒧ—         He helped himself to a few more desserts than he should have, but he had an incredible sweet tooth that he simply couldn’t resist. Seeing so many sweets that he could take, he couldn't help himself to more than just a few. "War ship, ey? Nice. The Queen Anne's Revenge was a French Slave frigate, La Concorde, took that shit as fast as I could. She's got 40 cannons. 30 meters, full rigged, gotta have 300 pairs of hands ta sail her." A lot of men under Edward's lead to sail his ship. "If she's still sailin', I mean. Don't know what those ponces will do without me ta keep their hides safe from the British. Or the French. Or the Spanish. Just about everyone, I guess." He pops another pastry into his mouth before taking another swig of the rum bottle.
"Real beauty of a ship, she's a little worn, but that just means she's well loved, right?" Earlier he was talking about how he didn't know how to love, but now he's talking about how much he loves his ship. He takes another pastry to eat, seemingly enjoying himself now.
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pyramultimuse · 2 days
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Seeing that the other did indeed brighten in mood a few more bottles appeared on the table for consumption. He smiled and stayed at the table to eat and drink with Edward, though not as much. After awhile of eating and drinking, dinner was finished and some dessert appeared in it's place. A tray of small tarts that looked like hand sized little strawberry pies and round flaky puffs filled with cream.
He chuckled at the slurred mistaken name. "The Jolly Roger, like what a pirate flag is referred to." Killian corrected and took one of the cream puffs to indulge in. "She's a 32 cannon war frigate, welsh built I believe. Beautiful as she is deadly. Sunk quite a few english ships in her years before we got stranded in this realm."
ᒥ🌟ᒧ—         Just the fact he can drink more seems to already brighten his mood, as he starts eating more than just the previous nibbles. "Ya can stick around, 'm serious about it turnin' my mood around." Feeling like he had a good chunk of of food in his belly the drinking begins. It's ravenous, like the rum was water and he was a man stuck out in the desert for weeks on end. The amount he swallows down in a short time is almost inhuman, even. His liver must have been pretty shot if he made a habit of drinking like such often.
Edward truly indulges, only slowing down to take a few more bites of food between giant gulps of rum. Food absorbed the rum, meaning he'd could drink double what he should. His goal wasn't to make himself sick, but he seemed well on the path to doing so. "Now," Having had enough, his words were slurred. "Ya got a ship, huh? The Rolly Jodger, right? The one ya mentioned ya were a captain of under the name Hook, right?" Ed questioned, perhaps prying a little too much, as well as messing up the name of the ship. "What is she?"
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pyramultimuse · 2 days
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Killian is about to answer but then told that the truth wasn't wanted. He made a gesture with his hook a little magical help to bury the memory and forget that trauma. He drank a bit and enjoyed it, Edward had his own drink but it wasn't enough to get a seasoned pirate like him even buzzed. Killian considered the effects it would have on Edward, but he also didn't want to deprive the man of his familiar comforts.
"You can drink as much as you want tonight." He answered after some thought. "Do eat what you can manage. If you end up sick it's best to have something in your stomach so you aren't vomiting up just rum and bile..." Killian said not wanting the other to drink himself ill but wouldn't stop him if he felt the need to over indulge. "You can go to your room or I can go to mine if you'd like to drink alone."
ᒥ🌟ᒧ—         "So, that was like a real thing? Not just an illusion in my head, huh?" He stops pushing his food, addressing the window situation. Edward decides, suddenly, he doesn't want to think about it again. It was too much in his fragile state. "Nevermind, don't tell me. I'd rather not know..." The man finally begins to pick at the food on his plate, taking the smallest bites. If he wants to stomach his food, he has to push all the memories aside.
"Can I get drunk? I wanna get drunk..." Ed finally looks up at Killian, of course it was about one of his vices that gave him the courage to do so. Well, the courage to ask permission. If he was told no, its not like he could throw a tantrum or lash out, he'd just accept it with silence. "...Would cheer me up, I don't know..." Now he's trying to convince the other that it was a good idea to let him get plastered.
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pyramultimuse · 2 days
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Killian mad a slightly soured look as he couldn't argue that the other was wrong for that. "Your anger masked everything else, other important feelings buried down that you weren't letting yourself feel. You'll get it back when I feel you wont let it control you." And when he felt like it wouldn't be used on him. When he felt that Edward grows comfortable or atleast tolerates him Killian does plan on giving it back.
He begins to pick at his food and what he doesn't expect at all is the apology. Killian looks at him surprised and there is honesty behind it, not just saying it to put him in a better mood. After a moment he nods in acceptance and picks up his bottle. "I'm sorry I threw you out the window. I tried to give you space in the bed so I wouldn't startle you too much when you woke, that obviously didn't work... It was not your fault I got hurt and I lashed out in my own anger, for that I do sincerely apologize." Killian said though he had a feeling that the other wouldn't believe him. Still he wanted to voice his genuine apology because Edward hadn't deserved that.
"We'll head out tomorrow and spend some time on the coast. I've missed the sea as well..." Killian said and took a long sip of his rum.
ᒥ🌟ᒧ—         "You won't even let me feel certain emotions, man, thats far from free will..." He feels his lip quiver some and bites down on it, trying to hold back more tears. Numb, he needed to numb and not think too hard about it. He takes a few deep breaths and calms himself. As for food, he takes a plate and gathers the smallest amount to push around and pick at. Killian sussed it out right, there wasn't much of an appetite for Edward.
"Sorry, for whatever I did to deserve this..." Edward mumbles in the midst of pushing his food around. It was, perhaps, the first time he uttered the word 'sorry' not just to Killian, but the first time in a long while. It felt foreign on his tongue, like it just didn't belong. Without anger he was just left to overthink the feeling saying such a thing left him, silent. "I would like outta of this place, even if it's just a quick sailing trip..."
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pyramultimuse · 2 days
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He'd continue to stroke and caress Edward's hair and face. At the dismissive answer he nods slowly, Edward giving the answer that is least likely to be punished. "You still have your free will, you can tell me things you want. Things that you'd enjoy. You may be somewhat on a leash, but you are able to take the lead as it were as long as you don't yank at my hold." Killian explained and was glad as he wouldn't have to deal with any more tantrums and violent outbursts.
The dark one climbed off Edwards lap now that the man had calmed down, numbed himself as it were. "I'm sure you aren't feeling up to eating right now, but try to atleast nibble at a little bit of what's here. You're still recovering from going without for so long." Killian didn't want him going on another hunger strike but after all that crying he was sure the man didn't have much of an appetite.
He went back to his own seat and helped himself, though he too wasn't feeling all that hungry and only took a small portion. Much rather focusing on the fresh bottles of rum that appeared for them.
ᒥ🌟ᒧ—         He peers up for only a moment, a numbness in his expression. The numb always came after the sadness, it was his second defense. Instead of lingering on the distress, he simply shoves it down and stuffs it away in the back of his head to let it fester until next time. The cycle repeats. "Nah..." He mumbles, answering Killian's intital question. "Showed up in the middle of the forest, nowhere near the shoreline." And since then he's just been moving from small village to small village, following empty leads and rumors of magic beans.
Edward moves his head off Killian and shifts uncomfortably beneathe him, "Whatever ya'd like ta do. Just along for the ride, I guess..." As dismissive as it sounded, it wasn't out of anger as he couldn't feel it. Rather, it was defeat. There was nothing he could do, after all. He was at Killian's whim, everything he tried could be easily countered with magic. Absolutely powerless, and he felt nothing but true defeat.
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pyramultimuse · 2 days
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Killian is glad that there is no flinching away, he was sure there was still fear but there was acceptance. He felt a smugness in him, victorious in his pursuit of claiming this poor man. The dark one had plans for him in the future, maybe one day they could be a team, but for the moment Killian was relishing in this moment. The comfort he provided was soothing to both of them.
He held Edward in his arms, fingers combing through his long hair and rubbing at his back. They sat in silence for a few minutes, no longer feeling the trembling of shoulders or the dampness of tears on his neck. "You've been cooped up in here for too long. Have you been to the ocean of this land?" Killian asked and tilted his head, pushing back some of Edward's hair to look at him but not forcing him to look up. "We could go to a tavern, I could show you my ship and we could go sailing. Being out on the open sea might feel like home, atleast it is from any pirate I've met. Would you like that?"
ᒥ🌟ᒧ—         His breath shudders with the touch, and his tremors begin again as he now fears the gentleness being taken away. He never experienced such a gentle touch, he never been open to it before. Even just a small gesture went a long way for Edward. This was wrong, all the manipulation going on, he knew it, but desperate for the feelings to go away he'd do anything possible.
The hand moves away and Edward whimpers again, it's pathetic and sad. He needed the anger, for the shame weighing on him was maddening. "Can't love...Don't know how...Never have..." He lowers his head again, his mind flooded with his real thoughts. The self-loathing, how could he love another when he couldn't even love himself? He wasn't just undeserving of love of others, but himself.
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pyramultimuse · 2 days
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His hand only moves a few inches away and Edward whimpers again in fear, this time of being without the touch he was graced with. Killian returns his hand to the other's cheek and rises out of his chair. "The only ones who can't love are those without hearts." The dark one said as he moved over and took a seat on Edward's lap.
He wrapped his arm around Edward and his hand moved to the back of Edward's head to gently guide it down to rest against his shoulder. Killian began to pet at the long grey locks and nuzzle at him affectionately. "It will come to you in time, dearie, it'll be a warm fluttery feeling that'll make you feel weightless... For now just take deep breaths, everything will be okay."
ᒥ🌟ᒧ—         His breath shudders with the touch, and his tremors begin again as he now fears the gentleness being taken away. He never experienced such a gentle touch, he never been open to it before. Even just a small gesture went a long way for Edward. This was wrong, all the manipulation going on, he knew it, but desperate for the feelings to go away he'd do anything possible.
The hand moves away and Edward whimpers again, it's pathetic and sad. He needed the anger, for the shame weighing on him was maddening. "Can't love...Don't know how...Never have..." He lowers his head again, his mind flooded with his real thoughts. The self-loathing, how could he love another when he couldn't even love himself? He wasn't just undeserving of love of others, but himself.
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pyramultimuse · 3 days
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The surrender came quickly, the other had no will, no strength against these emotions that he wasn't use to having. When Edward leaned closer the dark one brushed back some of the long grey locks. Then the soft gentle hand caressed his stubbled face and with it was a little of the soothing comfort that the pirate was looking for.
"Because we both believe we're unlovable and yet we crave it so much. The moment you summoned me I knew we were a match." His hand moves under Edward's jaw and he turns his face so their eyes could meet. "I don't expect you to love me in a day, but with time I will do all I can to earn it." The dark one says as he pulls his hand away.
ᒥ🌟ᒧ—         Edward could never handle these kinds of emotions, not without his means of self-soothing. Left no other choice he leans towards Killian, not voicing what he desired, but asking for it through gesture. It was literal emotional manipulation, his emotions were being manipulated against him and he was powerless to it. He still had very little trust in Killian, as this torture would certainly happen again and again, but to make it stop now he'd do anything. If giving in to the other's demands was the only way, for now, so be it.
"W-Why me?" He asks through shaky breaths. Why him? What did the Dark One want so badly from him? "W-What ca-can I p-possibly o-offer y-you?" There were thousands of other people more gullible than him, surely any other man would have fallen for such a deceptive deal, but why him to begin with? Edward wasn't all that charming, handsome, yes, but his personality was rancid beyond belief. No love, nothing authentic, could from his blackened, broken soul. What about him had the Dark One fixated on and determined enough to keep him around?
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pyramultimuse · 3 days
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"There is no more hiding, Edward, I'm not going to allow it. The more you try the worse you'll feel." His tone still soft had a firmness to it as the dark one set the napkin down in front of Edward on the table and gave him some space.
The more Edward tried to emotionally retreat the worse he would feel. There was no comfort found in his normal tactics in solitude. It made his heart ache more, causing these feelings to become more intense and hurt. As Edward sobs more to the point he no longer able to hold back and begins to openly week he is reminded of the magical bond to the man beside him. Unlike the last time where it felt like chains crushing his heart, in this moment it feels like an embrace. The warm and soothing feeling he was hunting for envelops his heart like cozy blanket.
"Do you want to feel better? Look at me, dearie." He spoke but it was not a magical order and could keep his gaze averted. "I'm not going to hurt you any more, there is nothing left. Surrender to me and I will care for you in the way you always longed for someone to, that you thought you were undeserving of."
ᒥ🌟ᒧ—         When he saw the hand moving towards him, in spite of the offering, Edward instinctively flinched away. A soft whimper escapes him, the anger may be gone, but there was plenty fueling his distrust. He didn't take the napkin, instead settling for the sleeve of his black blouse. He'd prefer to provide himself comfort even if it hadn't been Killian as the one offering such.
In fact, he seemed to be curling more and more in on himself. A bit of self soothing, making himself as small as possible so he didn't have to feel the ocean blue gaze set on him. Was this the worst torture yet? Yes, the window experience was pretty intense, so maybe that ranked number one. But this? Certainly a close second in Edward's book. To make him feel what he worked so hard to bury? It was agony, and that did nothing to help him curb the tears and sobs, sobs that were now poorly muffled into his arm.
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pyramultimuse · 3 days
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Killian quietly drinks as Edward is faced with a new reality without anger. This in turn was unlike any torture as now the pirated was forced to accept himself for what he was. It hurt to have all these emotions bubbling up and all spilling out with the tears that the seemingly older man was trying his best to hide from view. The bottle makes a soft thud as he sets it down and he picks up one of the cloth napkins on the table.
He reached out and offered it to Edward to use to wipe his tear. In a soft gentle tone Killian speaks to him. "Hate me all you want. But you are mine and I accept you in your entirety, Edward. I will always provide and care for you." Killian tells him in as comforting a way as possible. It took taking everything away so he could be the one that Edward clings to, the only thing that could protect him from this land. He tore this man down to his foundation so he could build and mold him from the ground up.
ᒥ🌟ᒧ—         "Fuck!" He yelps once he realizes he's back in the chair. And it begins, more torture, surely. Initially, Edward is fuming with boiling up rage. It's all he can feel, all he wants to feel. And just like that, it fades. And all that's left has him shaking in fear. So many years he received lashings, verbal and physical, for showing this part of himself. Along with fear came a deep feeling of shame, as though he allowed himself to give in to the urge rather than it forced upon him.
Tears fall and he lowers his head quickly to hide them behind his long, grey hair. He was overwhelmed by many emotions, and had no anger in him to tune them out. Edward couldn't hide them away, and so they all came spilling out. The fear, the shame, and the sadness. Overwhelmed by the mess that was his head, Edward remains silent with his features hidden away. He couldn't muster up the strength to curse the other out, his anger was gone and it left him silent.
Tense shoulders shake from silent sobs and the fear he felt should further abuse come from his show of weakness. His anger was a hefty defense being able to fight back all those emotions, it seemed. And without it and everything coming out, its revealed Edward is a very broken, sad husk of man.
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