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Good evening,

Pease consider this my notice of resignation from my position as Intake Coordinator at Awake & Aware. My departure date is April 17th.

I have loved working here and my exposure to DBT has been life changing. I leave with a heavy heart as I know the good this company does and the positive impact everyone here has had on me. However, I have been offered a part-time job working with my dad in the mountains that I have accepted. This offers me the opportunity to go back to school and pursue my love of astrophysics while also affording more time with my family and being in the outdoors. Additionally, I prefer a work environment with more privacy where I can have uninterrupted time diving into complex projects for hours on end and while I so enjoy the clients here, it has been mentally taxing to not have a more quiet work environment. Lastly, I am expanding my family and my priority is to create a simple lifestyle focused around quality time with them. I seek to live a more simple life with more time with loved ones and with mud in my shoes instead of behind a desk.

In preparing for my departure, I would be happy to re-write the current procedures I have created for this position to reflect the new changes in Valant and additional duties I have such around psych surveys and squarespace. Additionally, I would love to assist in training my replacement and seek to make my transition as seamless as possible.

Thank you all for the love and warmth I have felt while being here. It is a breath of fresh air and I am

Sincerely,

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what belongs to me?

Does my name? Because the other day I spoke with someone who had the same name so who is the imposter?

My thoughts? Are they mine to a point? I think of living.

My body?

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A quiet train where I can hear the meeting of sound waves of lips of passengers nearby who are whispering to each other. Each sound feels like a pop in the air and I can almost hear the crests of each wave linger in the air. Makes me feel like my ears are drinking coffee. It’s a soothing sound. I want to make a short film about it with just whispering. Maybe I’ll do that when I get home.

I’ve been wanting to write poetry about experiences I am having and felt at a loss. I find little romance in cities, fancy buildings, people staring at their phones, people posing for photos… it’s icky. I don’t desire to change my perspective on it. This is the last time ever ever ever that I travel and spend time in any big city. The more time that I spend in cities the less I feel. Its the human experience equivalent of the less sign “<“ and I want to disappear. I can’t help but compare myself to the other women here and it makes me feel silly to even leave the house. It’s likely a moment of weakness but I haven’t felt this ugly since the second grade. I could starve myself for weeks and still not feel worthy to sit in the park bench. Everyone here is white. Every city I go to I see white. No one is tattooed. I’m suffocating in it. I want to go to the mountains now. Instead, I’m spending days in Spain trying to hold back tears. Sometimes I’m just so darn sensitive that it’s any wonder I leave the house at all.

The only other thing I found inspiring on this trip was the opened cream balcony door in the hotel that let in a small breeze that made the room look like a French loft. I could stare at the sunset through the doors like I was looking at Monet.

Thankfully, I have found solace in physics. I wish I had brought my calculus book. I had a feeling I would need math in this trip. However, I’m trying to grasp quarks, gluons, confinement and I really have to push my mind to grasp the concepts presented in the brief history of time. This is my second time reading this section and it feels like I’m closer to grasping

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counting

On Thursday, There were two crows sitting in the middle of the baseball field

On Friday, there were 11 arches in the backdrop of the opera

On that day, I bought two drinks; a glass of cab and a small hot coco

On Saturday, I covered one white fridge in art

Today, there are two lovers sitting on a green couch making a life for themselves.

SRV