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This is why you don't sleep with the Tyrant King - The consequence is children

Constantine avoids involvement with the Infinite Realms for two reasons.

Who wants to deal with all those Ancients in the first place?

He’s avoiding yet another unhinged ex of his.

Of course, hooking up with Pariah Dark wasn’t really an actual relationship, more like a one night stand via dream walking (Nocturn owed Pariah, but seeing as it would be insane to release the Tyrant King from his endless sleep, he’d give him a dream partner every couple centuries) - regardless, Constantine doesn’t want to deal with that.

So yeah - the fact that the Justice League is attempting to summon the High King into the Watchtower has him wanting to drink more than usual.

Of course he gave warnings, but they’re dead set on doing so. A green folder had appeared in the secure “cursed artifacts” vault with no trace of whoever left it there. How else were they gonna find out how it got there?

So Constantine’s stuck there to set up wards, and is trying to find his way out of this one.

When the summoning circle worked, no one expected the teenager to pop out of it. 

Instead of Pariah Dark, or even the sarcophagus showing up, there was a white haired ghost boy with glowing green eyes the same color as the flames of the Crown of Fire. Except he didn’t look exactly like the others ghosts. He had a human skin tone, his proportions were exactly like a human teenager’s, and he was wearing a black and white hoodie with black sweatpants, for God’s sake. 

… Were ghosts able to reproduce with humans?

Before any of the Justice League can get into questioning, Constantine speaks up:

“You’re not the Ghost King.”

Green eyes settle on him, lighting up with recognition - Danny knows exactly who this is, with the amount of complaints on his desk about the blonde. Clockwork also informed him (he didn’t want to know but now he does) of the man’s stint with Pariah. 

Daniel “Commit to the bit” Fenton chooses to do just that.

“Of course not,” The confusion crosses the face of the heroes present- “That’s just because I haven’t had my coronation yet! I’m the Crown Prince, it’s practically the same thing!”

Oh, and the dread and realization crossing Constantine’s face is almost enough to make his core purr in amusement. 

“Now I will gladly answer all your questions, but first!” His eyes swept over the heroes before raising his hand and pointing accusingly at the British warlock.

“John Constantine,” his voice boomed, the temperature of the meeting room dropping as his face stretched with a smile too big and too pointy, “You owe me fifteen years of child support.”

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fixed it

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The reveal went right. Too right. Jack and Maddie will do anything to protect their son. Vlad will do anything to protect his new daughter. Dan will...suck it up.

When Danny told his parents he was Phantom, not only did they take it well, but they immediately started rallying to get the Anti-Ecto Acts taken down.

They rewrote their research, reached out to other Paranormal Scientists, and did everything they could.

That was when the assassination attempts started. They were all targeting...Danny. Not Jack, Maddie, or Jazz. Just Danny.

Moving Danny in with Vlad didn't stop them; if anything, the assassination attempts got even worse.

During a fight with one particular assassin that got past Vlad's security, Danny, Dan, and Dani knocked over some of Vlad's more...unstable experimental Ecto.

It...changed them. Reflected the age of their Ghost selves.

Danny and Dani are now two years old. Dan is somewhere around twenty-four.

Vlad...thinks this is perfect. He has an idea. The government is trying to kill a sixteen year old, they won't look at a couple of toddlers.

He smuggles them out of Wisconsin and gives Dan a bag. Inside of that bag is cash, fake IDs, and all the fake history Dan would need to start a new life. His cover is he's a single father to a set of twins.

Vlad looks pleased with himself. Dan valiantly restrains from punching him.

It has nothing to do with the fact that there are two toddlers watching him with way-too-big eyes.

Dan...sucks it up. He's an adult now, he can just kill all the agents, he doesn't understand why Vlad is so desperate to run. But whatever. Fine, he guesses.

He starts his shitty new life.

His only saving grace is that his neighbor, a guy named Roy Harper, is also new to the whole parenting shtick. They end up hanging out more often or not, letting Roy's Lian play with Danny and Dani, and typically babysit for each other if they can.

~~~~~~

Years later, Dan ends up saving Lian's life during a huge attack on the city that caused the apartment to collapse.

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Poll: if your mom remarries when you’re 26 years old is that guy still your stepdad or is he just your mom’s husband.

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sometimes in klife thers a cat oin you and you just have to deal wiht it

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⬜️ moon-moon4w00-deactivated

It's super problematic and you should be ashamed for ever liking it. Humans asking their lycan partners to turn them because they think it'll help them "bear the curse" is just disgusting and a gross misunderstanding of what being a werewolf is actually like. No one would ever choose this life. I've literally never met anyone who has, and I'm convinced anyone saying otherwise is a liar. If I had the choice I would have never done it.

🍖 roadkill-meatloaf Follow

That may be true for early iterations of the trope, but in recent years lycans using it far outnumbers the humans using it. Also last time I checked some of the first writers to use the trope are werewolves now. I think one is a werebear actually. And they love it. We don't live in the dark ages anymore. There are resources to help us now and we don't have to hide in shame. I think anyone who genuinely wants to be in this community should be allowed to.

Source: My girlfriend turned me because I did my research and I asked her nicely because I'm sexy like that.

⬜️ moon-moon4w00-deactivated

You're a freak and a degenerate and bring a bad name to all lycans.

🐾 superhowllock Follow

What about when you doxxed knotexplosion for the crime of *checks notes* being a fursuiter. Did that not bring a bad name to lycans?

🌜 impawssible Follow

THEY DEACTIVATED

Anyway, part of lycan acceptance is also accepting if and when people want to become one. No one bats an eye when humans say they want to be a vampire, so why should being a lycanthrope be any different? Both have their pros and cons obviously but so does being a human. Everyone has problems now let's go get you some fruit.

🦴 pupperoni Follow

Wait we can still eat fruit??? I've been avoiding it like the plague because I thought it was bad for us.

🌜 impawssible Follow

In all seriousness, in my experience just follow guides on what's safe to feed dogs and you'll be good. Now go eat a pineapple.

🌜 impawssible Follow

WAIT-

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LESBIAN VISIBILITY DAY (!!!)

GET PERCEIVED 👁️👁️

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0 cis women have been harmed by gender neutral language around pregnancy

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jesus take the (third) wheel

(side note they have the opportunity to do the funniest thing ever in s3)

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Other Universes

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Transgender Day of Visibility.

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Can we normalize the idea that women can have deep voices? please?? Especially for trans women who feel gross or out of place for their deep voice.

Please, break the standard that all women have high pitched, perfect, feminine voices.

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“I miss him…” 🧸🐰🎤🎸

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Mama Bat Masterpost

From a prompt by @tourettesdog .

Danny is hungry and homeless in Gotham city. When he gets caught stealing food, he points at the nearest adult as his guardian in hopes they'll play along and stop him from getting reported to the authorities.

That nearest adult is Cass Wayne.

Intro

Chapter one: meet Tim and Alfred

Chapter two: meet Damian and Batdad

Chapter three: meet Stephanie and Dick (two part reblog)

Chapter four: meet Barbara (first section posted)

Chapter five: meet Jason, oh no

Chapter six: bonding with Uncle Damian as the news gets out too far

The legal problems