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shy-sapphic-ace · 14 hours
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just asked my professor if he wants to feature on a song LMFAO
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shy-sapphic-ace · 14 hours
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yes girl I think it’s incredibly sexy how indecisive you are about every single decision in your life. I also love how you haven’t let anything go since you were 12. can we make out now
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shy-sapphic-ace · 14 hours
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hey boss i can't come in today it's a sunny day and there's a lovely breeze coming in through my window, yeah it's rustling the branches of the tree outside that's finally bloomed so it's pretty serious
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shy-sapphic-ace · 14 hours
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Whale Shark Gliding Through Bioluminiscent Algae _ Mike Nulty
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shy-sapphic-ace · 14 hours
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i love the phrase "cruel and unusual." not only is what you're doing mean but it's also quite frankly fucking bizarre
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shy-sapphic-ace · 19 hours
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BRO
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shy-sapphic-ace · 19 hours
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i actually do kinda like delivering groceries on the side because it gives me such a unique cross-section of the community. i never know whose groceries im shopping for until i finish the delivery and see them/their home and it's like it adds more detail to the picture of who they are. the baby supplies going to the apartment that i know for a fact is one bedroom (they'll be moving soon - i bet they're apartment hunting, i hope they find a place). the new cat litter box, bowl, and kitten food going to the house covered in "i <3 my dog" paraphernalia (a kitten definitely showed up on the porch recently and made itself at home). the fairly healthy boring grocery order that includes an incongruous tub of candy-filled ice cream going to the home of an elderly woman with toddler toys in the yard (it's clearly for her grandkids, whom she sees often).
shopping for someone else's groceries is a fairly intimate thing. i've bought condoms and pregnancy tests, allergy medicine and nyquil, baby benadryl and teething gel, a huge pile of veggies paired with an equally huge pile of junk food, tampons and shampoo and closet organizers and ant traps and deodorizing shoe inserts and a million other little things that tell a million different stories in their endless combinations. one time someone had me buy one single green bean. i messaged them to confirm that's actually what they wanted, and they said yes - neither of them liked green beans very much, but they had a baby they were introducing to solid foods, and they wanted to let him try one to see if he liked them. another time i had someone request 50 fresh roma tomatoes - not for a restaurant, but for a person in an apartment. the kitchen behind them smelled like basil and garlic when they opened the door. another time i brought groceries to three elderly blind women who share a house. that was one of the few times i have ever broken my rule and gone inside a place i've delivered to, because they asked if i could place the grocery bags in a specific location in the kitchen for them to work on unloading and there was no way i was going to refuse helping.
i gripe about the poor tippers, but people can also be incredibly kind. one time i took shelter from a sudden vicious hailstorm inside an older lady's home in a trailer park, while i was in the middle of delivering her groceries. we both huddled just inside the door, watching in shock as golf-ball-sized hail swept through for about five minutes and then disappeared. she handed me an extra $10 bill on my way out the door.
when covid was at its deadliest, people would leave extra (often lysol-scented) cash tips and thank-you notes for me taped to the door or partially under the mat. i especially loved the clearly kid-drawn thank you notes with marker renderings of blobby people in masks, or trees, or rainbows. in summer of 2020 i delivered to a nice older couple who lived outside of town in the hills, and they insisted i take a huge double handful of extra disposable gloves and masks to wear while shopping - those were hard to find in stores at the time, but they wanted me to have some of their supply and wouldn't take no for an answer.
anyway. all this to say people are mostly good, or at least trying to be, despite my complaints.
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shy-sapphic-ace · 21 hours
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I call upon the fan fic writing gods to bless you with the perseverance to finish one of your unfinished drafts. 
May your fingers dance along the letters upon your device with ease, may the devil of distraction stay far from you, and may your work not need much editing.
I pass this blessing upon every fan fic writer out there.
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shy-sapphic-ace · 21 hours
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occasional posts from users
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shy-sapphic-ace · 21 hours
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Frankly some of you should be hornier over weirder shit. The fear of being too genuine is the enemy of art. Be a bit of a pervert. It's good for the health. Doesn't have to be a sexual thing just own up to being a bit obsessed in some cringe shit it's fine.
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shy-sapphic-ace · 21 hours
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man this year is gonna be the year i either die or become someone else i dont know which one maybe both
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shy-sapphic-ace · 21 hours
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Shapeshifter who gets horribly grotesque and mutilated when flustered
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shy-sapphic-ace · 1 day
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the problem with being creative is that you start to feel very guilty when you haven’t created anything in a while
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shy-sapphic-ace · 1 day
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So I’m on a trip with my robotics team and there’s only two “girls” (me, an enby, and a cis girl), so we get our own beds in our own room, but the guys are rooming four to a room, but there’s only two beds in each room. Which means that two guys are sleeping on the floor every night.
I’m not joking. They were literally arguing over who’s sleeping on the floor tonight (apparently they plan on rotating).
And I asked them “why don’t you just share a bed?” And they all gave me the same answer:
“No, that’s weird! That’d be gay!”
And I just looked at them and I decided to break the bad news to them
“If lying next to another guy makes you wanna suck dick, you already wanted to suck dick.”
I’ve never seen so many Straight Guys™️ enraged by a single sentence before
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shy-sapphic-ace · 1 day
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#:0
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shy-sapphic-ace · 1 day
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shy-sapphic-ace · 1 day
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Being a young adult is so strange. You enter a coffee shop. The 20 year old girl waiting behind you cried all night because she just came to a new city for university and she feels so alone. That 27 year old guy over there works a job he is overqualified for, he lives with his parents and wants to move out but doesn't know what to do about it. That one 24 year old dude already has a car, a house, and a job waiting for him once he graduates thanks to his dad's connections. The 26 year old barista couldn't complete his higher education because he has to work and take care of his family. The 28 year old girl sitting next to you has no friends to go out with so she is texting her mother. That couple (both 25 years old) are married and the girl is pregnant. The 29 year old writing something on her laptop has realized that she chose the wrong major so she is trying to start all over. We are not alone in this, but we are actually so alone. Do you feel me
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